#i had lots of fun writing this tbh dfjsjhdfjsd

[basu-shokikita]

Dethentines 2024 Day 6

OT3

As it has been made exceedingly clear by now, Skwistok is my OTP. My one and only, my endgame, the only pair I can see romantically in Metalocalypse, etc...

Even so, I have a number of ships I enjoy in very particular ways and I thought today would be a good day to dip on that. So, for day 6 of Dethentines you're getting a Skwistokface extravanganza because I like it and I think it's underrated! God bless!

It wasn’t everyday that Murderface felt inspired, but when he did, it made up for all the other days. He was overflowing with inspiration and creativity, stimulated unlike any other, capable of writing the sickest solos and providing the most important contributions to the…

“Gods damns it, Moidaface, dat amsnt hows you plays de F sharps.” Skwisgaar interrupted him for the upteempth time. “I tolds you, you gotsa be on de fours frets.”

Murderface frowned. He honestly didn’t know why he had to convince Skwisgaar for his idea to be approved. It’s not like he was his boss, was he? They were all equal in Dethklok, right? Except for Toki, obviously, Toki couldn’t do shit.

But Murderface was an original member, he should have a say, just like the others. It’s not like Pickles had to talk with Skwisgaar first before Nathan heard him out. So, why did he have to do that? What, so because Skwisgaar was fucking hot and talented that made him better than the others? Was that what was happening now? Was that the band Murderface joined?!

“Soes…ams you gonna plays ors?” Skwisgaar asked, raising his one particular and condescending eyebrow. “I gots stuff to does.”

Like what? Bang old ladies and fret the guitar all day?

He was going to say that when a Dethphone started ringing. Before Murderface had the time to check if it was his, Skwisgaar had already pulled his own from his pocket. “Hullos?”

God. Now he was going to have a whole conversation when Murderface was trying to show him something amazing. He started replaying his solo while Skwisgaar mumbled on the phone.

“Ja…Ja, I ams with Moidaface. In de studios.”

Murderface was really getting into this solo. This shit was fucking great! What the hell was Skwisgaar talking about?!

“We ams playi- whats? Rights nows?” Skwisgaar glanced over at Murderface and then at his bass. “...Shores. Byes.” A click indicated the end of the call.

“Who wasch it?” Murderface asked while still playing, trying not to seem too interested. Was Nathan asking how they were doing? Pickles, maybe? Were they secretly excited to know what he was cooking up?

“Toki.” Skwisgaar said in a deflated tone and Murderface cursed at the guy in his head.

Fucking…Toki. 

“...And what did he want?” 

“He wanteds- Moidaface you ams screwingks de F sharps again!”

“Okay, scho why don’t you teasch me how it isch, schinsche you know scho much!” Murderface said defensively. He was starting to get really tired of Skwisgaar’s attitude.

“Dats whats Is beens…” Skwisgaar leaned forward and pressed Murderface’s finger against the third string on the fourth fret. “Just stays- Just stays…” He pressed Murderface’s finger harder but Murderface kept pulling it off. “Just keeps pressingks deres!”

“It fucking hurtsch!” Murderface yelled.

“It wouldn’ts hurts if yous actuallies prascktiscked!” Skwisgaar countered

Murderface glared at him with disdain. “Your teaching schuschks.” 

Skwisgaar’s eyes went wide for an instant and then he got up. “Alrights, dats it.”

“What?”

“Ams gonna makes you plays dats notes.” Skwisgaar looked down at him. “Gets up.”

“Why?”

“Gets up!”

“Okay, fine! Jeschusch!”

Skwisgaar frowned at him before he started surrounded him. 

“Wait, what are you-”

“Just stays stills, Moidaface.” Skwisgaar said from behind him. “You mades me do dis.”

“Do wha-” Suddenly, Skwisgaar’s arms were surrounding him and, little after, Murderface felt Skwisgaar’s chest press against his back. “What the-”

“Just follows my fingers.” Skwisgaar said in a low tone, his face next to Murderface’s. This time, his fingers were gentle when they pressed against his. “Dere you goes…and dens you can does dis…” He moved Murderface’s hand with his own. “Ja, dats good…”

Unfortunately, Murderface could hardly pay attention to what he was playing, as good as it was sounding. The closeness, the almost intimate way with which Skwisgaar was touching him, his voice in Murderface’s ear... 

Murderface couldn’t think, he couldn’t think, and it’s like the room was getting hotter all of sudden. Like the temperature had dropped to hell-like levels. Did he have a fever? Was he getting sick? Was he dying?!

“Sees how easies it ams whens you listens to me?” Skwisgaar said so smugly but Murderface was already sweating, unable to come up with a retort, unable to move even. “...Moidaface?”

“Ah!” A voice shouted, and Murderface raised his eyes. It was Toki standing at the door in shock, eyes like they were about to pop out of its sockets, his jaw dropped to the ground. 

“Oh, Tokes.” Skwisgaar straightened up. “I was just teachingks Moidaface hows to-”

But Toki wasn’t listening, walking fast towards them, an expression of unbridled anger in his face. His guitar, hanging from his neck, knocked against his thighs with each of his steps.

“Toki?” Skwisgaar called him with confusion.

“You!” Toki pointed an accusing finger and Murderface began to flinch. “You rats!”

“Whats?”

The veins on Toki’s face were terrifying. Oh, shit, he was furious, and Murderface never wanted to be near that. He closed his eyes in fear, awaiting for the impact.

Yet nothing arrived.

Suddenly, there was a pull from his arm. “You ams tryings to steals Moidaface from mes!” Toki exclaimed childishly. 

He opened his eyes in surprise and saw it was Toki’s hand grabbing him from the arm. 

“Heugh?” Skwisgaar raised both eyebrows. “No, I ams teachingks him de notes.”

“No, you ams stealings hims from me!” Toki insisted with a pout. He pulled from Murderface again. “Let’s goes, Moidaface.” He was strong enough that he was going to drag him away from sheer strength alone.

“Noes.” Skwisgaar was now grabbing Murderface from the other arm. “We ams goingks to keeps prackstickings.”

“Noes!” Toki yelled. “We ams goings to plays! Comes on, Moidaface!” His grip on Murderface was getting stronger.

“I saids noes.” Skwisgaar was frowning now. “We ams prackstiskings.”

Toki turned to him, offended. After a few seconds glaring at each other, he asked. “Why you gots to copies me?”

“Seriouslies?”

“Ja! Yous always copyings me!” Toki argued. “Yous always doings whats I does! And nows yous tryings to steals my friends! Gets yous owns!”

“Toki, Is never once copies you, ams you kiddingks me?! Yous always copyings me! Yous! And yous copyings me right nows against! Goes gets someones elses, goes!”

“Noes, I wants to plays with Moidaface!”

“I don’ts cares! We ams goings to prascktice!”

“Stops copies me!”

“You stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

Caught between the bantering and the pull of two different people, Murderface couldn’t think. He couldn’t process this. This was perhaps the first time in his life two people were fighting over him. And it was pretty flattering, he didn’t know Skwisgaar and Toki liked him so much. Could it be that he was underestimating his popularity all along? 

Nice.

“Fucks you, Skwisgaar, he ams comings with me!” Toki spat, pulling harder from Murderface.

“Fucks you, Toki, he ams stayings with mes!” Skwisgaar retorted, pulling just as hard from Murderface.

“Noes, he isnts!”

“Yes, he ams!”

“Ladiesch!” Murderface raised his arms, smugness all over his face. “No need to fight over me, there’sch plenty Murderface for everyone.” 

Skwisgaar and Toki stared at him, then at each other. Then, they got more aggressive.

“You ams just jealous Moidaface ams mines best friends and favorites evers!”

“Oh, ja?” Skwisgaar challenged him. “Wells, he ams my favor tits too, and he ams also mines new rhythms guitarists!”

“Whats?” Toki was baffled. “You cants do dats!”

“Oh, yes, I cans!”

“Wells, I loves him!”

“Noes, I loves him more!”

“Stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

…

…..

……..

Skwisgaar stared at Murderface’s unconscious body on the floor. “You thinks he ams dead?” He glanced at Toki.

“No ways.” Toki said. “He ams laughings, sees? Totallies alives.”

Skwisgaar leaned in to inspect Murderface’s face. “Oh, ja, he is.” He straightened up. “Whats weirdos.”

“Ja, he alls be fines.” Toki sounded disinterested.

“Soes, eugh…” Skwisgaar gazed at the guitar Toki was still holding, almost apprehensively so. “Whys you knocks him outs whens you arriveds?”

“Oh.” Toki’s face turned inexpressive, though if Skwisgaar had been any closer, he would’ve been the pink tinge on his cheeks. “I don’t knows. He ams just pisseds me offs.”

“Eugh…”

“Wants to prackstice?” Toki suddenly asked. “I brings my guitars!” He lifted the bloodied guitar.

“...Ja, shores.” Skwisgaar followed Toki. “Since whens you wants to pracsticke?” He asked with skepticism.

Toki shrugged and smiled at him. “It ams a good days, rights?”

“Rights.” Skwisgaar reluctantly agreed. As Toki cleaned the blood and dust off his guitar with his shirt, he wondered. 

What were the odds that the two laziest members of the band suddenly felt like working on the same day?