#i had the world's worst insomnia breakfast and sat in existential dread
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#described in alt text#i did not fall back asleep in case you were wondering#i had the world's worst insomnia breakfast and sat in existential dread#all alone in the darkness. unable to cry but also unable to fathom a future that wasn't exhaustion.#but fortunately i work from home with flexible hours (which is a whole other Ordeal but it comes in handy at times)#so i got in about an hour + of sleep at 9am in which i invented two fictional youtubers and stopped watching one channel#because it looked like he was peddling vaguely antisemitic dog whistles of the left-wing variety#no these did not correspond to actual antisemitism. my brain made up a youtuber and then invented an antisemitic dog whistle#and debated whether or not he knew what it meant and decided to stop watching anyways#all in my sleep might i add.#as in i dreamed i woke up and was kind of perplexed by how realistic and mundane the youtube video was#this was all in the dream#anyways this is a sign that i am too online and need to Stop#but now i am mostly fine and the existential dread is gone#but the existential dread is gone :)
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