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“Can Love Really Stretch So Far” PART 2 The Electric Boogaloo
So I finally got around to writing that TFP Soundwave “nice ending” since a lot of people were upsetti that his ending was just me bullying him in the original fic, SO!!! Here’s a snippet of what I have so far. This new fic is gonna fit into the series theme of health by basically covering depression and healing weakened/unhealthy Spark Bonds.
If you can already guess how this is gonna play out I’ll write the first person who tells me a drabble lmao
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Soundwave had lost the will to function.
This was not a surprise to him, as apparently it was a long time coming. It was only because of his little shuttle that his optics were opened to his own reality.
That he had been ghosting through functioning for millennia by now, a piece of his spark flaking off with each deactivation of his cassetticons. The light of life in his optics dimming as he wadded unthinkingly and unknowingly further away from his dreams, his want for equality, his hope for a better life for those he loves.
Loved.
Soundwave had lost the will to function, and he was ok with this.
He hadn’t realized that he had a warped view of love until it was forcibly taken from him. He never realized how addicting it was to have his spark filled with warm affection, of promises of devotion, of pleasant tingling that he could get lost in, until as suddenly as it appeared, it was gone.
He hadn’t realized that those warm, comforting feelings that came with a healthy Bond were no longer present in his Amica Bond with his Lord, until he felt them missing when his little shuttle had left, taking their strange Conjunx Bond with him.
Soundwave had lost the will to function, and those he thought cared about him never even noticed.
After his little shuttle and his strange crew went back to their world, after they had decimated the Decepticon army and left them in ruins, Soundwave merely drifted. He wasn’t really aware or cared to be aware of what was going on around him. What he saw in his little shuttle’s memory files was like opening his optics for the first time.
It was like seeing his world, his choices, his actions in a brand new perspective.
And he hated all of it.
Soundwave had lost his will to function, and it started long before he met a little green shuttle named Cosmos.
But still, he functions, because what else can he do?
Nothing, really. He’s powerless to change his life now. Forced to watch all his bad choices and actions crumble around him. But they feel distant, like he’s watching a scene from a holo-vid, not experiencing his own life.
He watches the Nemesis fall from the sky, and crash into one of this planet’s oceans, sinking to the bottom like the useless weight she is.
He watches his Lord descend into lunacy from his losses-- or was he always this insane and Soundwave had just never noticed?
He watches the dwindling army finally become wiped out in its last battle with the Autobots.
He watches, and sees, Knockout and Breakdown fighting, red badges centre focus on their frames. He finds he no longer cares about their cowardice, for he also does nothing to stop them from slaughter their former underlings. Is that cowardice of himself? Treason? He finds he doesn’t care.
He watches, and does nothing, as his Lord is brought down not by his own arch rival, his longest enemy, and his only equal in battle-- but by the young yellow scout. He feels the thin, weak, neglected Amica Bond he once shared with a well-spoken, hopeful mech named Megatronous snap like an old, dried out rust stick. Easily and in a million pieces.
He watches as the Autobots take a moment to realize the gravity of their actions, that the war is truly over with the single thrust of a blade, before one of them thinks to look up at him. It was Knockout, the medic’s wheels spin nervously on his back, like he expects Soundwave to attack them or something foolish. Then Breakdown, moving to cover the little red medic on instinct, most likely responding to his healthy Conjunx Bond. He must feel the good doctor’s anxiety. Soundwave misses feeling that.
He watches as the Autobots raise their arms at him. How foolish, he did nothing to stop them take down his Lord, why would he fight them now?
He watches the look of confusion cross their faceplates as his servos grip his Decepticon badges on his shoulders.
He watches as they gasp when he rips both of them off and toss them to the ground. What do they expect? The Decepticon cause is no more, they just slew him, his energon is still pooling around their pedes. He has no right to be wearing the insignia of an ideal he no longer follows, or the badge of the Lord he let be slaughtered in front of him. With that thought, he also reaches up to unlatch the faceplate he has worn for so long, discarding the pane of glass that had been his only method of communication for vorns on the ground with little ceremony or second thought.
He watches as the world’s colour changes before his optics, it becomes brighter, more colourful, vibrant. Is this how his little shuttle experienced life? Without the dark hue of a visor hiding him away from what was right in front of him? He kind of hates it.
He watches as Optimus Prime moves towards him.
He watches the Prime freeze as he speaks for the first time in over four million years: “Autobots: Victorious. Soundwave: Offers congratulations. Request: Do not follow.”
He watches as the Autobots lurch forward to grab him as he transforms.
He watches their silhouettes shrink as he flies off, the smattering of their blasterfire nowhere close enough to his frame to stop his flight.
Soundwave had lost his will to function, and all he can do is watch the remains of his life vanish behind him.
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Soundwave has no idea where he is, nor does he care to find out. He flew for what seemed like vorns, yet also only felt like breems. He flew until he saw where the land on this planet ended and only another ocean stretched out in front of him.
Not feeling like flying until his fuel ran out, dooming himself to drop from the sky and sink to the bottom like his former warship, Soundwave landed.
It was a small island he found himself on, one with a small mountain range, covered in organic forests and one small human settlement that he could see, but didn’t care about. He bypasses the human controlled area quickly, and instead landed at the base of a mountain.
He had finally caught his little shuttle at the base of a similar mountain.
Losing himself in the memory of the chase, Soundwave could almost feel the emotions running through his spark once again. The pleasure, the terror, the thrill, the resignation, the power, the helplessness, the desire, the revulsion, the static, the static.
A hesitant, yet insistent, pinging came from Laserbeak, reminding him to finish seeking out a hideaway. He sent a conformational ping back, and began to circle the mountain side.
A little ways down he found what he was looking for, a cave opening. Laserbeak dutifully undocked without prompting, and flew over to explore the crevice. He stood there, silent and unmoving until she returned, docking once again and sharing her findings. The space was a little narrow, but he would be able to fit in with some maneuvering, but down a ways the cavern opened up a little more, large enough that he would be able to stand and stretch without problems, but little else.
It would do.
With that Soundwave began to crawl through the opening, and twist around the narrow passage until it opened up into that promised larger space. He settled along the far wall, struts splayed out on the ground in front of him, back strut resting against the rough rock.
“Laserbeak: Disengage.”
He could feel confusion through their connection, yet she was loyal and detached herself as asked. She floated for a little bit, unsure of what to do or where to go, before settling on her Host’s pede, turning a single optic up at his bare faceplates.
“Laserbeak: Free to leave. Soundwave: No longer fit in role of Host. Recommended: Trail Autobots to find new Host.”
Her outrage, confusion, and hurt burst across his spark like blasterfire. Her plating ruffled in anger and indignation. How dare Soundwave try and get rid of her!
“Correction: Soundwave loves Laserbeak.” As he said this he realized it was true. He cared deeply for the casseticon, and really didn’t want to lose her like he had lost all her siblings, and yet… “Soundwave: Unfit to love Laserbeak. Actions: Brought forth the downfall of Decepticon cause. Actions: Let siblings offline. Actions: Let Bonds grow weak and unhealthy. Actions: No longer able to provide for Laserbeak. Consequences: Laserbeak will offline if she stays with Soundwave. Solution: Laserbeak must leave to continue functioning.”
She stared up at him, worry and resignation coming to him through their Bond. What about him? What would happen to him if she left?
“Soundwave: Lost will to function. Consequence: Directionless. Solution: Deactivate here. Recommended: Laserbeak continue to function with new Host.”
She stared at him, her end of the Bond oddly silent. After a little while, she rearranged her wings and flew off, disappearing through the cave tunnel.
Soundwave tried not to feel hurt as he watched her go. Instead he powered down into a light stasis.
#personal#soundwave#tfp soundwave#laserbeak#tfp laserbeak#maccadam#maccadams#my stuff#coswave#im gonna try a new writing style too#its gonna be repetitive and like almost NO descriptive stuff which sucks because thats all i do when i write#but ik when im depressed i think in repetitive motions and SW seems like a kinda guy not to focus on minor things like how the clouds look
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