#i know the whole 'black women strong' thing is yknow a thing

[magicstormfrostfire]

I hate being told how 'strong' I am when I say I'm so tired.

[queenofthefullmoon]

An exhaustive list of Bloodborne bosses I would or would not date

Father Gascoigne

We’re starting this list off with a strong yes. You may be like, but Blue, this is a married man with two daughters! To this I reply: I pretend not to hear it. Also, not to be horrible, but his wife is dead while I’m right there baby, with my blunderbuss and my axe, and I’m ready to risk it all. YES, I know he’s a very stinky man, but you gotta make compromises sometimes. What’s that smell? Ah, the sweet dilf, it sings to me.

Cleric Beast

Let me be clear, I’m not a furry, but the Cleric Beast has stated some facts and made some points! The only reason why I’m not to keen on dating it is that it can’t best me in battle, which is something I’m always looking for in a partner.

Blood Starved Beast

Our first no of the list, I’m not very into skin flaps and poison, which the Blood Starved Beast has plenty of. Moreover, I’d have to get Djura’s approval, and that scares me beyond anything else in Yharnam.

Vicar Amelia

Another Cleric Beast, this time with a bit more flair to it. First of all we just have to admire the way she transforms, very sexy and bloody, which is something you’re gonna want in your relationship if you’re someone who likes fun. (Thiccar) Amelia, cradle me like your golden pendant.

Hemwick witches

Another hard no here. No offense, but I like having eyes, and dating a pair of witches covered in eyes that they’ve been harvesting for years doesn’t seem like a good idea to me!

Shadows of Yharnam

Honestly yeah? You get 3 cool partners in black robes for the price of one. They all wield different weapons, which makes for two excellent things. First of all, you get a very efficient bodyguard team (useful at parties, when a hunter gets drunk on blood, or when you open your front door and a beast is there). Secondly, if you want to have a fun sparring match with your partners, which we all know is a fundamental activity in a couple, you have very varied options!

And a bonus for animal lovers: they can spawn snakes at will for you!! Never a boring day with your 3 hooded partners.

Rom, the vacuous spider

NO. Don’t date Rom. She’s baby! She doesn’t understand what’s going on. Instead, here’s a list of nice activities you can do with Rom:

- Read her stories

- Trims her back growths

- Clean her teeth

- Make her some cute little glasses

- Knit matching socks for her and her children

- Teach her new spells

- Not date her

Darkbeast Paarl

Paarl is a similar situation as Rom. He’s just a little puppy… He doesn’t know what dating is. He knows what going on a walk means, though! So go on, go on a happy little walk with Paarl. He’ll love it, you’ll have fun, everyone will be happy.

Amygdala

Yes. Evidence that it’s a good idea is: lots of arms (good hugs), can grab the shit out of me, CAN and WILL crush me, can sometimes shatter my consciousness with its eldritch powers (very sexy), can send me in other dimensions, will annihilate my enemies with a funky laser beam, and the most amazing feature: can pop it’s eyes out of its skull like a stress ball (fun trick to show your friends at parties). The ideal girlfriend.

The One Reborn

NO!!!!! There’s a lot of freaky stuff I’d date in Bloodborne but the One Reborn is NOT one of them. Firstly, it has 6 nannies. Do I look like the type of person who wants their dates consistently moderated by 6 Pthumerian elders? No!!! I’m a free bitch baby!! And in addition to that, Juan Reborn just has too many limbs. It’s not okay. If we ever got engaged I wouldn’t know where to slip the ring.

Micolash, Host of the Nightmare

Would I..? No, I wouldn’t… Unless? Haha, just kidding. Wait… Actually… Um.

I mean… If you’re into bastardous hysterical little men who howl while running around, sure. BUT beware… You might lose him in a mirror and never find him again, which I find very inconvenient. Imagine going shopping with a guy who compulsively disappears in mirrors. Imagine explaining to the store employees why your dumbass boyfriend broke all their mirrors.

Also, how will we kiss?  With the cage on the way?

Oh god, do I have to wear a cage too?

Celestial Emissaries

I’m not against having a multitude of partners but I’m afraid that might be too much for me. Also, they look like little tiny bebes. I know I’ve said before that I wasn’t ready to be a parent, but I might make an exception for the Celestial Emissaries — let them chill in my home, make them pb&j sandwiches, stuff like that.

Ebrietas, Daughter of the Cosmos

Dear Ebrietas… I have a lot of fondness for her but she looks way too much like mac’n’cheese for comfort. She’s invited for sleepovers and all, no doubt about that, but I see our future together as platonic.

Martyr Logarius

Now Listen… Logarius is an Enemy of women. The proof of his crimes still remains in Cainhurst castle. Do I want to date the genocidal Yharnam Santa? Are you really asking me that? Do you take me for Executioner Alfred? I am not crazy. I will not date Martyr Logarius and his red skulls spamming ass (however miss Annalise queen of the Vilebloods, call me).

Mergo’s Wet Nurse

Um yes of course? Tall dark eldritch wife? I feel like Mergo’s Wet Nurse is the Dancer of Bloodborne, where I’m in a situation where I’m presented with the ideal girlfriend and people expect me to say no because she’s an enormous eldritch entity who could kill me in one hit or whatever. Do you think me a coward? Do you believe that I am not willing to risk it all for invisible girls? Think again.

Gehrman, the First Hunter

Ew no! Gross! He’s gonna make a doll designed after me and I will have to call the police!

Moon Presence

On one hand yes (see Mergo’s Wet Nurse) but on the other hand… I feel like the Moon Presence would be too possessive and easily jealous. I just need some freedom, yknow? The liberty to go out and make friends with other Great Ones. And I know she would NOT like that. She’d ask me if I’m the only Great One I’m talking to and I’d have to nervously hide my phone and say Yes Babe Always Babe, lest she would shackle me to an unending dream. I’m not about that life.

Ludwig the Accursed/the Holy Blade

I genuinely don’t know what to say. The screaming horse man? Am I— the horse boy? Him? No. I… I’m not gonna. I love his sword. Lots of class. Very good theme song, could be cool to have him as a friend (maybe I could ride him around to different locations?) but to date? Kiss his horse mouth? KISS HIS EYE MOUTH? You could say that… Neigh.

Laurence, the First Vicar

NOW WE’RE TALKING BABEY… All the class of the Cleric Beast with FIRE included! Picture this: it’s the winter, it’s snowing, and you’re cold… NOT! You are dating a FLAMING BEAST, you are never cold. Laurence has one proper arm to hold you and one arm that’s a constant flaming inferno, which means he’s great for the summer and the winter, depending on which temperature you want to be at. Your enormous flaming boyfriend will always be at your side.

Living Failures

First of all mood, second of all, this is kind of a Celestial Emissaries situation where I’m not against having many partners but I don’t want a whole congregation of them. There’s just too many Living Failures. I also like dating people with faces? And that aren’t, like, blue. So it’s a no from me, but I’ll befriend them. I’ll go garden with them and all. We can have a girls’ night, it’s all good.                      

Lady Maria of the Astral Clocktower

I’m gonna have to be predictable and say yes here, but fair warning, Lady Maria isn’t for everyone! I know she looks like the perfect wife, but get this; this lady is a hunter. She’s only a lady because she’s related to royals. She has nothing ladylike in her. You think she takes baths? You think she knows what self-care IS????? I laugh at your ignorance, at how you misunderstand her. Maria is a stinky girl; but she is MY stinky girl.

Orphan of Kos

I don’t want to date the Orphan of Kos because he was literally just born and still has his placenta attached to him.  I don’t care for infants, and I don’t care for violent infants. I wouldn’t even want to invite him over to play with the Celestial Emissaries or something. He’s like that asshole child in kindergarten who hurts the other kids for fun. Am I being harsh to a literal baby and an orphan at that? Maybe. But Kos herself couldn’t tell me I’m wrong.

Bonus chalice boss: Yharnam, Pthumerian Queen

Now listen here… Yharnam is a queen, tall and kinda eldritch, absolutely rabid, which we’ve established is my type. Shall I step on the toes of Oedon and declare her mine? Perhaps. She has a very powerful scream, which worries me in case of a domestic fight, but overall I get to marry a kind of eldritch queen, which is alright in my book. I know she has an equally eldritch baby, but it’s formless, so it doesn’t bother me that much.   Dark Souls 1 ll Dark Souls 2 SOTFS ll Dark Souls 3

[totallypathet]

Episode Nine

Is it just me, or is anyone else less of a Jeff Goldblum fan after that show? Very bizarre. Speaking of bizarre, can we talk about Roople's wardrobe this season? Theres been a few looks I've absolutely hated, but that look he wore on the main stage was actually heinous. I mean honestly, what is he spending that fracking money on? Bc it ain't wardrobe, hair or makeup.

Let's chat quickly about the mini challenge as well. Remember when mini challenges were fun, light entertainment sketches instead of straight up advertisements? Greed ain't a good look Roop.

The main challenge this week was a really great concept. It worked well in season 4 (except for PhiPhi, but that's to be expected), it makes sense to bring it back for another election year. I also think it was a great choice to bring it back this year, it opens the door for really important political conversations - like the struggles of being LGBT+ in conservative states, being black or a POC in the US in general, being an immigrant... I'm so glad that the space was given for the queens (Widow and Jackie in particular) to have those conversations. However, I think there was too many queens to make that debate coherent. They didn't give it enough time, the editing was bizarre, and it was really tough to follow what was actually happening and who did well/didn't do well.

All that said, let's jump into the breakdown...

1. Crystal Methyd

Crystal makes me proud every week, and this week was no exception! She just jumps from strength to strength and I love her more and more each week! Her debate was pretty good, I love that she really leant into the drag aspect, and (obviously) her mullet, and she made me laugh! I enjoyed her. And her loooooook on the runway!! She was giving me lifeee, I just absolutely loved it! I didn't get what carson was saying about it being too much at all - it was very Alyssa Edwards, like it should be too much but it just works. The hat, with the blue hair, and her make-up, I loved all of it. Great night for Crystal!

2. Gigi Goode

Gigi suffered from the edit I think this week. I get that she was going for this robotic character, but she didn't really get the time to build, it was too fast paced. But also I definitely get what the judges were saying, she's clearly not very politically engaged, which is a shame. I think in these times we all have to be a little bit politically aware - I'm not saying you have to know every detail and get news alerts every 5 seconds, but you just have to know a bit, yknow? I'm not even American and I feel like I probably know US politics better than Gigi does.

Also, we've seen the robotic character before. Show us something new.

I didn't live for her runway either. It seemed like a less good version of her entrance look. It felt lazy somehow, and I just wonder if Widow had worn it would the judges have gagged over it so much? Or did it only work bc Gigi is a skinny white queen? I dont know. I think Gigi should have been lip syncing this week - but I guess the producers know they can't pit her against Widow because Widow would wipe the floor with her.

I feel like Gigi is coasting, and it's a shame. She's better than this. I wonder if maybe she might have needed another couple of years just to really solidify her star power.

3. Heidi N Closet

The thing that confused me most about Heidi this week was that in the work room she had that really great slogan "no more closets" that she was toting, then she didn't say it once in the challenge? I didn't get it. Regardless, I thought Heidi was great in the challenge! She looked the part, she gave me that conservative Southern Belle character with her (literal) pearl clutching, I enjoyed it. She looked like she was having fun, and that's my favourite thing on this show; when I watch a queen have fun, I have fun. Loved it.

Her look on the runway was cute, she did the assignment, she looked great. It wasn't particularly creative, but I enjoyed it. Really strong night for Heidi.

4. Jackie Cox

Jackie was so so so important this week. Of course, as Persian LGBT+ representation, she's always important, but this week really opened the door for her to delve deeper into her story, and talk about how important it is to be politically aware, how affected immigrant families are under Tr*mp's presidency, how affected Muslims are, the importance of voting, what the word "American" means... so so so important. I'm so glad she told her story, and I'm so proud of her for representing her heritage.

Having said that, she wasn't great in the debate. I thought the Canadian thing was funny, but it didn't develop, it just sort of flat lined. And it was a shame, because she fully looked the campaign trail part.

Her runway look was perfect. It was so powerful, and so beautiful, and it will have touched so many LGBT+ muslims around the world.

5. Jaida Essence Hall

Jaida was so good this week. I loved her character in the main challenge, it was so absurd that it was just hilarious! And she managed it being absurd and funny on the top layer, and underneath was this perfect satire and cynicism. And she was so quick! So witty! And she looked like she was having so much fun. I remember I said a few weeks ago that I felt a little bit disconnected from Jaida, but this week i felt like we were just seeing pure Jaida. She was just enjoying herself and I related to her so much. I was so happy watching her this week. She fully deserved her win.

However. I hated her runway. I dont know why! I just really hated it. Her hair and makeup was beautiful (of course!) but that outfit was just... I don't know, it confused me. Maybe that was the point, maybe it was an extension of her character in the challenge and I just didn't get that!

6. Widow Von Du

I'm so sad about Widow. I absolutely adore her, she was one of my absolute favourites from the beginning; watching her go right after Jan was so hard.

I do think she deserved to be in the bottom, which is kind of shitty because she didn't do a bad job at all! It's just that she wasn't that funny, and we all know that that's the trick to this show. She really looked the part, and she had some jokes, I just wonder if she was off rhythm because she was so tired. And then as soon as she got frustrated on the runway, we knew it was all she wrote. Which is also shitty! She was frustrated, and she had every right to be! It seemed like she couldn't do right in front of the judges. I felt like she was just airing her feelings and expressing her emotions. I don't know why the judges are so opposed to that on the main stage. Like it seems to be fine when they just demurely cry, but as soon as they have something to say about the critiques, no matter how valid it is, they get bashed for "not taking constructive feedback". I dont like that - she's upset, she should be allowed to be upset. If you dont like it that much, cut it out in the edit, but damn she's allowed to have feelings.

Also I loved her look this week. So powerful, so important, so beautiful.

I just hope she knows how incredible she is, and is able to recognise how great her work was throughout the show.

I do have a couple of other things to say about this episode (me? Have opinions? Unheard of!).

First of all, Jeff Goldblum was way out of line talking about Islam being homophobic/sexist. Jackie was making an important statement about how important representation is, and it was totally inappropriate to turn that into a religious debate. I do think it's so important to talk about LGBT+ rights and womens rights globally, but it's also really important to distinguish between culture and religion. And even more important to recognise the difference between governmental culture and social culture. It's an incredibly nuanced topic, and he clearly isn't well informed. To be honest though, even if he hadn't said it the way he said it; he shouldn't have been talking over her about issues that directly affect her. The whole thing was inappropriate. At worst, it was racist/islamophobic, at best it was tone deaf and misjudged.

Secondly, let's all just take a moment to think about how this episode dealt with politics, politically charged subjects and patriotism; and how interesting it is that the two queens who chose to represent black and Muslim empowerment were in the bottom two. Just something to think about.

[rockybalfeatherboa]

getting these mtl headcanons outta my system

This is a long ass post but these r some random metalocalypse hcs that I feel kinda strongly abt some r real silly ok here it goes 

Aka me projecting

Toki - Enjoys activities like roller skating, weight lifting and boxing (that’s why he’s yknow fucken ripped) - Also enjoys model cars but not nearly as much as his beloved fighter planes - Thick brows - Hair is very thick and smooth (and,,pretty) but he doesn’t put a lot of work into is making the other guys kinda jealous - Sometimes shaves his legs below the knee but that’s it - Does shit like host teen choice awards and guest star on children’s tv shows BUT THEN acts surprised when kids love him,,,tf bitch this is ur fault - Absolutely loves physical affection he fuckin loves hugs and kisses!!!! - Prefers making out and titty groping groupies (and maybe a blowjob) over having sex with them .. but will still do it if he feels like he’s up to it - Kisses with his eyes open (and overall just real fuckin weird ok) - Keeps the video from Juliette sarmangsadandle in his nightstand he treasures it - Mostly writes his own keyboard parts for songs - Band thinks he’s hilarious when he doesn’t try to be but when he tries to tell jokes they don’t work ,, but he’s really funny in Norwegian it’s just the jokes don’t really translate too well so he just,,keeps it to himself - Pickles taught him how to smoke and now they like to chill and smoke together it’s like “their thing” - But he’s really picky about it he only smokes indica - (This is me projecting) Learned the phrase “if u feelin froggy then jump” and never stopped using it

Skwisgaar - shaves e v e r y t h i n g bc of 1) the aesthetics and 2) loves the way it feels - long lovely legs - huge fucken feet - has a klokateer pluck and tweeze his eyebrows them shits be on fleek - cries in secret at least once a day it’s become routine - He kept in touch with his Swedish gf for a while but then fell off and went back to hoeing #hoe4lyfe - Secretly wishes he can go back to wearing all white but he has to maintain brand recognition bc of the band - Wears very slight sweet smelling cologne behind his ears and wherever else cologne goes - Either eats a fuckton or not very much during the day,, keeping his metabolism on her toes - Guitar playing for him is like ultimate stress relief and also he fidgets with it he loves that thing - Has a book of various songs or riffs that he’s written on the guitar that dethklok will never ever use - Wears highlighter - Has run into one of his grown ass children in the bank one time and had to get the fuck out of there immediately,,they didn’t realize it was him tho -  Puts his feet on nathan just to bother him - Great teeth / really conscientious about hygiene - Cold hands and oily skin type - He has a pretty good sense of rhythm but ,, he can’t dance he can’t dance for shit oh my god it’s a disaster to look at - “I look like I can’t cook… that’s accurate” - When he drinks wine he does that thing where he swirls it around like a bougie piece of shit - Lactose intolerant :/ - Talks with his hands a l o t it’s over dramatized and very fascinating to watch - Responds to compliments with “I know”

Murderface - closet gay*   *gay but he grew up in such a homophobic environment so he tries to ignore it and pretty much force himself to be straight, explaining his constant trouble with women (Bc the attraction isn’t genuine ) and his fragile masculinity (so he’s always a “fellas is it gay to-“ or a “no homo” type of guy ),, his self esteem issues don’t help this out at all - big fuckin crush on skwisgaar (and skwis loves the attention) - sleeps with a retainer - hair is so dry,,,,,,please give this man some conditioner oh my god - knows pretty much everything about the civil war and the American revolution literally ask him anything he’s like a textbook - Somebody come get this man a pedicure - He has a lot of fans and they adore him it’s just that he’s oblivious to it,,, ppl love murderface!! - He’s not as ugly as he thinks he is or that people make him out to be, it’s just that people may think that only Bc the rest of Dethklok is so pretty. He kinda just ends up looking the worst by four-way comparison. It’s just a different type of look he has there’s nothing really wrong with his appearance - Imma go head and say it,,,he uses “y’all” - He and toki have actually made some decent songs for planet piss but it’s usually when they’re jamming out so they pretty much never get recorded 🤷🏽‍♀️ or remembered - He can move his dick voluntarily I mean I already knew that people with dicks can do this but murderface has like a whole new level of control with his - Got banned from Fintrolls bc he pissed in the olives but he just keeps coming back bc what are they gonna do? nothing - He takes his weapon/torture device collection very seriously like when u walk into his room u better not touch a damn thing or so help me -

Pickles - has nose piercings but doesn’t wear em - Small ear gauges - Strong toned legs especially shins and calves - Has not had a swig of h20 in 6 years but somehow has nice skin (a mystery) - Loathes Seth but absolutely a d o r e s  the baby!!! He loves that damn baby and always appreciates when Seth or amber send pics or FaceTime call !! Fuckin uncle pickles!! - Helps toki compose his keyboard parts for songs (Bc he too can play the piano) - Kinda flexible but not as he used to be,,he used to be able to do a full split - Likes to bug Charles a lot bc they’re the closest in age , sometimes they hang they’re good buds - Watches shitty reality tv (bad girls club, LHHATL (it has to Atlanta), etc) as a guilty pleasure - Kind of an asshole but in a way that leaves u wanting more - Played basketball freshman year of highschool,, he was ass at it lmao - Idk how much this has to do with being a headcanon but if pickles was a vine he’d be “I said whoever threw that paper, ya moms a hoe” he just carries that energy - Smells like a light combination of weed and cologne it’s really nice - Will tell one of his band mates to go blow their nose if they’re sniffling too much

Nathan - doesn’t like it when people touch his hair without asking but HOWEVER if u ask before u do he’d probably say yes ,, just gotta warn him first damn - Hates hates h a t e s feet it’s like a weird squirmy phobia. He’s ok with his own feet and just *seeing* other peoples feet but let someone’s bare foot touch him and he’d probably black out tbh - Really socially awkward outside of his stage presence but I think we all knew this - Nathan’s really sweet he just ,, u gotta know him - Really emotional when he’s drunk - Secretly cussing out everyone in his head - He doesn’t completely dislike physical affection but he’s not crazy about it either - Also kisses with his eyes open (but unlike toki he’s trying to work on it) - Dad bod but we all knew this too - Slightly introverted ..he likes to party and shit but can only take that much social interaction for so long then it’s time for him to go home - Eyes are so striking and pretty oh my god it’s like they’re shining it’s all his gfs favorite thing about him - ,,,,,,,thicc - He’s one of those people that rip off their hangnails instead of cutting them 😖 - He can throw down on the grill goddamn why isn’t he in charge of snacks? - Knows how to suture a wound with some level of proficiency - He loves his parents he just hates how they embarrass the fuck out of him god leave me alone mom and dad! - This is ironic to the last thing but remember that video where it was like “son let me hear some of your music” “I don’t think you’d like it” “c’mon let me listen” and the song is just “I hate my dad I hate my dad I hate my dad” the whole time yea that was Nathan in high school - Strong arms (b,,beautiful) - As a kid he used to poke at roadkill for uhh entertainment - Used to be self conscious about his reading glasses but doesn’t gaf anymore - Severe case of resting bitch face he’ll literally be chillin but his face will be mean muggin but that’s just the way he looks - Tried PCP and ended up having to be chained to his bed betcha he’ll never smoke that shit again - likes crime investigation shows and serial killer documentaries - Will n e v e r  refuse a fresh hot salted pretzel

[faelapis]

Gem Designs

anonymous asked: hi, how do you feel about gems looking like humans? i've seen a lot of redesigns made to criticize that that tap more into an eldritch horror aesthetic, making them look like monsters or mythical creatures. do you think it would be better to have the gems look more different?

those redesigns are fun - i haven’t seen it as a serious criticism, but they’re always creative. more to the point... there’s a reason aliens often look humanoid in media: it’s humanizing. it helps the audience sympathize. in a 11-minute show like su, you need to be able to convey visual information about a character quickly. this is a great video about why it’s done - it focuses on non-humanoid aliens, but it gets the point across. 

the designs of su are rather fun, horrific and strange sometimes, though: having humanoid limbs be “standard” conveys information about fusions by having their number of body parts be a part of their personalities, as well as suited for their fighting style (three arms for a yo-yo fighter like smoky quartz, six arms for a multi-weapon wielder like alexandrite).

in the case of the cluster, which is way outside the human norm, it also conveys the Otherness of this kind of existence, and the “wrongness” of half-dead, non-consensual fusion experiments. 

one thing i love about the designs of all gems? their limbs, especially upon regeneration, are like wooden marionettes. this is incredibly fitting, as their bodies are just illusions piloted by their living gemstone. 

their holograms are basically light-puppets, hosts the gems generate, who only exist as long as the gem is connected to that temporary host - it exists until the gem regenerates a new form (like... a gem’s old body is gone forever. it was just a hard-light illusion. her eyes and fingers and hair is all-new, and it will dissipate when the connection to her gemstone is broken - the only “real” part of her). 

the gems are explicitly non-organic, and having their base materials be injected into the earth like viruses is a cool touch, also enhancing their Otherness by the fact that birth and death don’t work like we’re traditionally used to. 

there’s also a lot of fun to be had by the enormous size differences in the show. pearls are basically little dolls compared to diamonds, and even the best of shapeshifters can only stretch their forms so much, which ties into the storylines around ‘fitting’ into your caste or being ‘defective’. 

oh and, representation: characters like garnet, ruby, sardonyx, ect, are all obviously black, and female-aligned gay people can relate to pearl, ruby, sapphire, rose, ect, despite them being aliens. i feel this would be much less obvious if the gems were less humanoid, and this would also go against body type variety if pushed far enough outside the humanoid zone. the show focuses much more on the gems being like us than unlike us - the surprises usually come from how we are different, like the gems not aging. it would perhaps be a stronger argument that the gems aren’t “really” gay/black/non-binary/asian/bi/ect. representation if the gems didn’t “look human”. 

the show is very proud, in particular, of mainly being about women/female-aligned aliens and humanizing them in a show that “anyone” can enjoy. many gems defy gendered expectations without living inside the human patriarchy, where a woman “shouldn’t” be as tall, muscular, chubby or strong as jasper and rose. rather, the tall and beefy jasper is the ideal of her kind, and canonically-XXL rose is revered for her beauty. 

yet another reason? guys, we didn’t always know the gems were aliens. this is something i feel people forget - for a while, steven assumes the gems are just... magic. yknow, like witches or something. we know their bodies are an illusion, and it’s slowly hinted that the gems might be alien invaders, but it’s not outright confirmed until “the return”, when greg screams it out loud (and the homeworld trio arrives in their big, green alien ship). 

having them be ‘obviously’ alien by looking like lizard-people or tentacle monsters kinda ruins that whole twist. this would be a shame - i think it’s one of the more interesting revelations in the show. it helps build the important episodes of s1B, as well as raise interesting questions in s1A (lapis says “home” is not on earth, but what does that mean? did the gems leave or... arrive here? what are they? - stuff like that) after the gems are already humanized and assumed to be “like us” in some way. the show also plays with a lot of alien motifs in s2: there’s episodes like “joy ride”, aka the alien cornfield episode, and the cluster is the Eldritch Horror to peridot’s Little Green Man (of who both are sympathetic, which i think is really cool). 

the connections between gemkind and humanity is also, obviously, a big theme for the entire show. yknow... communication, building bridges, learning from each other, facing problems head-on rather than running from them, finding common ground. hence steven being steven.

so there’s a lot of reasons to have them look humanoid! personally, i think representation is the most important part, because su gives us a lot of characters we’ve never seen before, especially not in children’s media. 

if you DO want your dose of less humanoid interpretations of the gems, though, look no further than @radioactivesupersonic‘s abstract gem series! their design of characters like rainbow quartz, blue diamond and sapphire are all fantastic. just because i like the canon designs doesn’t mean there aren’t cool alternative interpretations out there ~

[zeddraws]

Brown People Have Feelings Too. The title is one I've contemplated for a few days. This is because I wasn't entirely sure how to pitch my views of the experiences of brown people. Yet, after a collection of experiences during my recent holiday to Croatia, I decided that the phrase from my title was necessary. As a brown person, and others with my complexion(feel free not to) they would agree that being brown isn't easy. Many of us are blessed to grow up in a cosmopolitan society where differences are celebrated with a plethora of skin tones, languages and cultures, let alone the modern movement twitter hashtags such as #UnfairAndLovely and #PraisinTheAsian and so on. However, I couldn't feel any of that pride once I went abroad. At first when I went to Athens, Greece earlier this year. I felt the stares of the locals the entire time I was there. Once were entered touristy areas we (I was accompanied by another brown person) felt more comfortable because we managed to see other people that looked like us. Thus making us more comfortable. It's a standard game we play, 'Spot the Brown Person'. Seems ridiculous I know but it happens! But what struck me the most was my recent experience on a tourist 3 island boat trip in Croatia on a pirate style boat (which was totally freakin' awesome and we took a gazillion selfies on it!). When we first boarded my mother instantly befriended a friendly Bulgarian man who agreed that he has noticed a different treatment to certain people. He told my mother about how he witnessed a Lebanese family being treated unkindly by a bus driver on a recent trip. By this point my family and I hadn't received any unkind treatment by any of the staff or locals, but we couldn't help but noticing receiving less smiles than other families. Later on in the trip was when we experienced unpleasant behaviour. On the trip we would return to the boat after each island. The second time we returned to the boat, our seats were moved to make way for the lunch buffet that was provided. We noticed a number of people had changed seats, and luckily we found some seats on the corner in the shade; ideal for my mother with sensitive skin and a problematic foot. Ten minutes after we sat down an older couple sat on the chair next to us, picking up makeup wipes that were left on one of the chairs. Now, for the life of me, I KNEW I wasn't being paranoid, I could just feel this woman's dirty looks. After a few huffs and dirty glances, the woman with attitude and her husband waddled off and left us be without saying a word. So I thought nothing of it.. THEN, what came next could only be described as a toddler tantrum from two parents, as a man with a strong American accent, came bustling towards us barking 'I can't believe this! I reserved this for my family! We reserved these 5 seats for us to sit together!' Now, my mum being the QUEEN that she is, she didn't move an inch. She very calmly stated 'There was nothing on these seats and our seats were moved, everyone has moved seats'. The man continued to bitch and moan 'what am I supposed to do? I have to swarm my family yknow!?' Now from where were sitting, we were bemused. This man was bitching, and I stick by my choice of 'bitching', at my family taking us 3 chairs when there were 4 chairs free and a spare chair behind the 4th right next to him. My sister even said 'there's a spare chair there' but was ignored. The wife came along and too started to complain openly to her husband 'where is my mask!? I need my mask! I left it and I need it' but never directly asked us. IF she had, she would've understood that there was no mask when we sat down and clearly it was loved by either the boat's staff or by their elder relatives that had sat there previously during dirty looks beforehand. I stood from my chair and said 'you can sit here I don't mind standing' and the husband said 'No no you don't have to stand' to which I thought to myself...'so why are you complaining? Why are you emphasising the issue if you don't want a solution?' So I sat and didn't budge. The son was the sweetest, roughly aged 7-9 who innocently said to his mum 'can't we just sit here' referring to the empty seats that were directly behind them. They begrudgingly listened. This trip to the final island of the those was the most uncomfortable 20-30 minutes of my life. We were made to feel so isolated and rejected when not too long ago we were enjoying ourselves and mixing with people from different countries. Nothing was overtly spoken to suggest it was a race issue, or wether it was sexism. But it was an argument that didn't need to happen. After the final island we climbed aboard the pirate ship, more cautious than previously so. We found seats away from the apparently 'claimed' corner and sat in the middle of the deck. We noticed a group of young men had sat in the corner and I knew exactly what my mother was going to say. 'Let's see if they receive the same treatment' to which we already knew the answer. When the rude people returned we heard their irritated voices sing 'not again!' as they witnessed the catastrophically unmentionable incident that their 'rightfully owned' seats had been taken. I'm telling you now, if my mum had popcorn in her hand it would've suited the look on her face. The big eyes emoji would've best suited the look on all my family's faces! The husband bitched, the wife bitched, and one gentleman moved to let them sit. However the rest didn't give a shit and it was glorious. They begrudgingly moved elsewhere, accepting the defeat hey deserved. And again the young boy with his pure innocence was the only one I felt sorry for, but he didn't complain once. The only thing I could hear was my mother's sarcastic 'oh dear' as they walked past, embarrassed of their failed conquest for those golden, sacred chairs. It was a small but satisfying victory. But looking back I couldn't help but be bothered by the experience. Why didn't I stand up to the husband's horrible attitude? Why did the men in the chairs receive less of an argument than we 3 brown women did? Why did my family receive less smiles from staff during the whole trip than other families? To be clear, the men who sat in the seats after us were all young, well built, white men. They also didn't receive nowhere near as much confrontation and complaint as my family did. So maybe the issue at hand is more to do with gender as opposed to race. But it was that incident that highlighted every interaction that happened afterwards. I noticed we got less 'service with a smile' as others. I noticed less staff wouldn't ask us questions about our day. Was it indifference or fear? These are experiences felt by my friends of colour too. Black friends stared at and even taken pictures of abroad without their permission. Sometimes the look of fear. Am I being ignorant because I've lived in London too long? Heck, even when I attended the University of Portsmouth I couldn't help but feel like the token brownie during my English Literature lectures. Is this something I should just accept? Has London spoilt me in terms of believing that diversity is accepted outside of the major cities? These questions plague me because I can't help but feel that asking them is redundant. Not everyone is equal in everyone's eyes. There is an underlying prejudice I can't help but feel the burn of when I'm looked at by certain people. I know this isn't as bad as being spat at called 'paki' (which did happen to me walking home after school aged 15), or having letters on fire pushed through your letterbox (this happened to my grandparents' close friends not far from where we grew up) but it still bothers me. What is the solution for this issue? I'd like to know. Am I supposed to not travel to certain places because of this? Is it safer to keep quiet and accept these incident rather than speak up? I'm not sure. It's a shame because on the outside I'm sure it seems like I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill. An insignificant blip in what was an amazing trip abroad for 7 days. But, when you notice these 'looks' all your life, and hear sometimes your closest loved ones whispering ignorant comments about your religion, culture or race, you can't help but build up a feeling of resentment inside. You can't help but feel marginalised by the society you want to be an active part in. I shouldn't have to say it but it's true. Brown people have feelings too.