#i originally came up with it as part of my riot grrrl au i think

[causewealwayshaveeachother]

she/they bi trans butch lesbian nick

bc. nick dresses like a butch lesbian

pins: x x x / ritual 6 / ID in alt text

some hcs:

nick is very much the sort of "i am a woman because i'm a lesbian" sort of gender

not nonbinary, just likes she/they pronouns

she's out to her family, and to her girlfriend (and her girlfriend's dad) and that's it. coming out is hard. it means people asking questions and changing perceptions and losing friends. there's also just, like, so many steps. there's too many things you need to do. hell. hell. what if they just didn't -> it also might mean getting switched to the girls' lacrosse team, and like, nick is all for trans inclusivity in sports, but like, these are her guys. and also the team she knows how to work with. really, they ought to make it co-ed

nick is the handsomest butch princess at the princess dance party <3 -> alternatively, nick attending a short-notice princess dance party in her normal clothes + a pink feather boa and plastic tiara for that nuanced gender experience

nick's little sister is the coolest kid in her class because she has a "secret sister" -> adults assume this is an imaginary friend. kids assume she's a superspy like kim possible. nick's sister doesn't confirm or deny anything because she's good at secrets

carrie likes having "girls' nights" and painting nick's nails while they gossip and vent. nick doesn't get any particular gender euphoria from having painted nails, but it is gender affirming in the "this is a thing girls do together" sense

nick's very happy with their gender presentation, actually

being only out to carrie is part of why they stay in their on/off relationship for so long; nick doesn't want to lose being able to go over to carrie's house and just vibe knowing that all 2 people there know she's a girl. she really doesn't want to have to come out to more people -> nick liked hanging out with carrie more before they were dating. but there's no going back now! -> it's not like you can just go back to being friends with your ex or anything!!

nick, posessed by caleb: well THAT's definitely not my gender. nice to have those lingering doubts handily done away with. also, i would like to not be posessed please

nick is now significantly less okay with being constantly misgendered by 99% of everyone they know! -> cause yk. being possessed by a transphobic ghost pretending to be you for months. it has what one might call An Effect

after all the caleb stuff, nick ends up hanging out with the whole ghost band gang more & makes trans friends for the first time! -> they also learn that you can, actually, go back to being friends with your ex, if you're willing to like, have an honest conversation and talk it out

with all the openly trans people in the ghost band gang (flynn, luke, willie, reggie in particular as a fellow transfem) nick feels a lot more comfortable and undaunted by the idea of coming out to them since, like, they already know what's up -> nick's like what's up i'm a she/they bi lesbian and flynns like damn same and then they high five

bc she's now regularly hanging out with a whole bunch of people who know her pronouns and thus hearing them used with some regularity, she starts to get used to it for the first time :) -> downside: now it feels bad when people don't use them. that plus yk. The Caleb Thing means that now they kinda really want to be out, instead of relegating All That to a nebulous future where it's easy and not complicated. Oh Fuck That's So Much Shit To Do. luckily, she has her friends by her side :)

julie and flynn (and luke and alex and reggie and willie and the molinas) help motivate & support her to actually go through with coming out instead of just continuing-not-to-but-now-it-feels-bad -> and help her remember & deal with all the Billion Fucking Steps and Paperwork. executive dysfunction is easier with a friend<3

when nick comes out publicly, she literally just starts wearing pronoun pins. no other changes in appearance whatsoever. she already dressed exactly how she liked :)

when she gets her name legally changed, she just changes it to nick, bc changing your legal name to a nickname of your deadname rules