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havethetimeofyourstyles · 3 years

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Chapter Seven.

a/n: hello! this is the last chapter of book 1! thank you for the few who had read and left me nice messages and feedback, i truly appreciate it with all my heart. the next chapter will be posted in two weeks from now. also, please please please reblog and leave feedback for the content you’re consuming for free; it truly helps motivate content creators to keep posting. for now, enjoy this chapter <3

SERIES MASTERLIST | word count: 17.7k

warnings: sexual content, panic attack, and mentions of drug use (from minor character)

come talk to me about WTSGD! i’d love to know your thoughts!

June 2, 2018

Hot grainy sand seeped in between the crevices of their toes as they ran around, chasing one another while the hot sun shined brightly on their backs. An in sync laughter erupted through them as Luci had jumped on Harry, causing him to fall back on the sand.

They were a picture-perfect moment, simply consumed by one another that envisioning life without the other was pure torture.

June was the last month of her break before she was off to Singapore to film for Crazy Rich Asians. Throughout the entire month of May, she was booked between rehearsing with her acting coach and auditioning for this role. The entire process didn’t take as long as Ocean’s Eight since they’d given her the role within a week and a half of just auditioning for it. She was entirely surprised at how quick it was to make that decision, but Samantha had told her that her talent had gone a long way and they wanted her. Luci was absolutely thrilled, and she was at a place where she didn’t feel pressured or overwhelmed with the workload. Thea and Samantha were gems to work with; they both made sure and asked several times if she wanted to take on another project right after finishing her first one, and Luci realized why shouldn’t she? Opportunities aren’t usually thrown at her this fast, so she took the chance and landed the role.

However, taking on another role just meant she’d have to leave again, meaning she’d have to be apart from Harry. Luci, in a way, would call herself selfless to where she would give up her dream if her loved one asked her to; but she had the tendency to make impulsive decisions without consulting everyone that was going to be affected by her long but temporary absence. Such as Harry and her family. Her family, as she knew, would tell her to go for it and that she shouldn’t worry about them when she had another opportunity lined up for her. As for Harry, she hadn’t thought about the fact that they were going to be apart for another four or five months. She didn’t think about the fact that she was spending the majority of their relationship apart from him and in different time zones. She didn’t think about him when she immediately said yes to taking on another project.

The anxiety had crept up on her when she told Harry the news, and just like the supportive boyfriend that he was, he was absolutely thrilled and excited for her. She hadn’t matched his excitement, and that was when he knew something was wrong.

“Talk to me, Ci.” He rubbed her back comfortingly.

“We’re gonna be apart again,” she said sadly. “I don’t wanna do this.”

Harry took a deep breath. “Don’t wanna do…us?”

“No. I don’t wanna work if we’re going to be apart. I wanna stay with you.” Her eyes were filled with tears. Her voice was heavy as she felt like her throat was closing in on her. Harry saw and felt the ache she had felt in her heart. And all the same, it broke his heart.

“You have to do this job.” Luci looked at him with sad eyes, half hoping he wouldn’t have said that.

“But…”

“My love, do you realize what this could mean? That movie is going to be huge. Just imagine all the people you’d work with if you took on this role. Your name is going to spread like wildfire after that!” His tone was hopeful and supportive, everything she could ever want in a partner. “Please tell me you won’t quit this job. Your dreams are finally coming true, why stop now?”

“Because I wanna be with you.”

“You are with me! I appreciate you wanting to be with me because trust me, I really want you by my side all the time, but don’t worry about me, okay? You’re not going to lose me.” He shook his head, looking so deeply into Luci’s eyes as if he were engraving his words into her mind.

All she did was nod, not trusting her voice to mutter out a response. She trusted Harry wholeheartedly, with her entire life. Later that evening, she told Thea that she was one hundred percent committed to the movie.

They had about three weeks to spend as much time together before Luci had to leave again. Aside from Harry finishing up the school year and Luci having meetings every other day with her managers and some of the producers from the film to sign off on some contracts, they’d managed to make ends work. They made sure to make up for some lost time from when Luci was still filming for her first movie; they spent mornings sleeping in until one would wake up and tease the other, which would result into having a lazy and sleepy morning sex; they went on countless dates, and truly gotten to know one another without any distractions.

Harry insisted on going to Coney Island Beach, which Luci was always up for. Luckily, no one recognized her, interrupting their perfect day together. They spent the day hand-in-hand, chasing one another into the water, and laughing until their stomachs ached. After a tiring moment of running around and being goofy, they settled onto their beach mat as their chests heaved up and down. Water droplets rested against the ends of Harry’s hair as he looked at Luci, who was wiping off the sand that had stuck to her thighs as she was completely unaware of his stare.

“Tell me about your earliest memory.” Harry requested.

Luci smiled at the thought. “I was four-years-old. My family and I went to Mexico for the summer. We’d gone all over the country before so I have bits and pieces of all the cities we’d gone to.” Harry listened as she talked about her childhood memory. “I remember all of the kids clubs that our parents checked me and Nathan into. There was this one kids club in Cancun where it was The Flintstones themed, and we got to paint shirts with Bamm-Bamm on it—I still have that shirt till this day.” Luci reminisced on the recollection of the summer during her younger years.

Harry’s eyes widened. “Really? That shirt is, like, twenty-two-years-old now.”

“I know!” Luci laughed; a sound that was glorious to his ears. “I just can’t get rid of it. It’s really the only thing I physically have from my childhood besides all of the video tapes my dad took of us during that trip.” She sighed, reliving those moments in her head. “What was your earliest memory?”

“I was probably about five-years-old, but I remember my mum and dad got us a dog. We named her Bunny; although I think I named her myself because I was attached to her the moment we got her.” Harry smiled, and Luci giggled as she imagined little Harry meeting his dog for the first time. “She was a golden retriever, and was always the happiest. When we’d get home from school, Bunny would always be waiting by the door, and would follow me around the house everywhere; sit next to me while I was eating at the table, laid her head on my leg when I was watching TV, and would sometimes sleep with me—I’d just have to sneak her into my room because my parents didn’t allow it. We had to put her down, though, because she had some kind of infection. She lived a very good life. I hope she didn’t complain.”

Luci fondly smiled at him. She loved learning about tiny but significant pieces of Harry’s life, and it just made her love him even more than she already did. Love? The thought momentarily and internally freaked her out, but then she realized that those thoughts were correct. She loved Harry.

He was thinking the exact same thing she was, as if their minds were linked in a special way that they could only convey. Curling his lips in, he felt his heartbeat pick up into an erratic pace that he felt like it was about to burst from just looking at her. His stomach fluttered with butterflies, erupting into a cave of monarchs, suddenly feeling nervous. He blushed, fidgeting with his ringless fingers that felt dry from the grainy hot sand.

Was this what it felt like? He pondered in his head. He’d never felt like this before, never felt this feeling with his past partners. And he knew the difference quite well because when he looked back at his previous relationships, he saw a time frame that only fit into a certain moment in his life. But looking at Luci right now, he saw the entire world. The sun shined brighter when he thought about her. His every sated thought was consumed with her, and that thought scared him, but it was thrilling and exhilarating, leaving him wanting more.

“Luci.”

She looked up, flashing him her smile that he’d fallen for over and over again. “Yeah?”

Taking a deep breath, he spit out fire, “I love you. I think I have for a while now,” and made the spark ignite in her stomach.

Her eyes widened, speechless. And that was when Harry thought he completely messed everything up and ruined their domestic and happy routine. That was until she said, “I love you too, Harry. You make my heart beat ten times faster.”

“Really?” A sheepish smile landed on his face, and Luci thought he was the most adorable person she’d ever met.

Nodding, she scooted closer to him, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “Really.”

“You make me so, so happy.”

Just as they shared a loving and tender kiss under the sun, momentarily, all their worries went away.

When it was time for Harry to say goodbye to her, it never really got easier watching Luci leave. By the end of their paradise break where they’d spent days and weeks together nonstop, he had dropped her off at the airport and watched as she stepped onto the escalator on her way to TSA. The entire scenery and feeling felt somewhat familiar to him, but he still felt pain in his chest every time he had to go back home without her, where she wouldn’t be across the hall from him. It was like watching her leave for the first time all over again, as if his mind hadn’t quite grasped at the concept of being alone for another few months again after spending a few weeks together.

He only hoped it would get easier.

Luci had erupted a light inside of him that he’d never known was there before. He had spent years of being in the dark, years of not knowing where to go because that certain light wasn’t guiding him. But the darkness seemed to fade away ever since he’d met her. That beautiful smile of hers was the sun that seeped through the windows in the early morning. But when the source and power for that certain light was gone for months, miles away, then all electrical power goes out too.

Harry carelessly threw his phone on the bed, masking the urge to scream into agony. He pulled at his hair, inhaling and exhaling through his nose to keep him calm. His anxiety was bubbling up, and he felt his hands shake.

It had been a long week for him, and it started from Monday as it carried on to Saturday. On Monday morning, he was late for work; he slept through all three of his alarms that he’d set up the night prior, making sure they were at a decent volume. He woke up an hour later, rushing to get dressed for the day. As he was brushing his teeth, he spilled toothpaste on his white shirt as if he wasn’t late already, he had to change again.

Tuesday through Thursday were a mess for him; he wasn’t his usual self and he felt very off. It had gone to the point where his students had noticed and asked him if he was okay right as they were leaving for lunch. Of course, he told them that he was fine, but as soon as they left, he spent his lunch time crying, not getting a chance to eat his food.

On top of the horrible week, he hated giving quizzes on Fridays, but he had to anyway because after every story his class finished, there was a quiz—it just so happened to be on a Friday. As he was packing up, getting ready to leave, he made sure the quizzes were nice and stacked before he put it into his messenger bag, but the unfortunate perfect timing had occurred and his coffee spilled all over the papers, leaving a brown, wet stain on more than half of the quizzes. He wanted to quit right there, on the spot before he let his students retake the quiz all over again. He did his best keeping his composure until he got home, slamming the door and completely dropping all of his belongings on the ground, not caring about the mess.

Harry didn’t know what caused him to have such an off-putting mood, but the thought of missing a certain someone had lingered in his mind, screaming at him to conclude his breakdown.

All he wanted was to see her, talk to her, hug her—but she was miles away.

Luci had been hopping from country to country in Asia, filming and working for two months already; and within those months, she had only contacted him five times. Despite being together for seven months, he didn’t want to constantly text her, asking for her attention because he didn’t want to think he was needy. But this time, he really needed to talk to her.

Grabbing his phone that he threw on his bed, he dialed her number. He heard the phone ring once, twice, and a third time before he’d lost all hope that she wasn’t going to pick up. But then, the ringing stopped, followed by a soft: “Hello?”

Hearing her voice after a couple months made Harry let out a sigh of relief but was soon trailed with a few tears. Luci heard sniffles and soft cries, and she felt an immense amount of guilt in her chest.

“Harry? Baby? Are you okay?” The sound of his name on the phone didn’t do her beautiful voice justice. “H, you’re scaring me.” She sat up on her bed, way too big for just one person. The white and soft sheet surrounded her, and every time she woke up and fell asleep, she thought about Harry and wished to get lost and tangled within these sheets with him.

He sniffled, leading into a deep breath. “Sorry, I know it’s early over there-”

“No, no. Don’t be sorry. Are you okay, my love?” She asked concerningly.

“I-I don’t know. I’m just so overwhelmed and…” she heard him start to breathe heavily, and she only wished she was right across the hall from him to take him in her arms.

“Harry,” she interrupted. “I’m going to need you to breathe for me, okay? Slow and big inhales and exhales. Breathe with me.” Harry nodded, even though she couldn’t see him. He took a seat in front of the bed on the floor, propping his knees up so he could place his elbows on them as he leaned his head down in between his arms, making a small cave as he protected himself from any more overwhelming emotions and thoughts.

For the next minute or two, they breathed together on the phone, and it calmed down hearing her breath deeply. Luci held it together, not wanting to break when she was the one that was supposed to calm him down.

“Are you ready to talk about it?”

Harry gulped, closing his eyes before he told her about his week. He hadn’t talked to her for the entire week, so he didn’t spare any detail on his messy and awful week. Luci listened intently, not wanting to give her attention away from him even for a moment; she pressed the phone against her ear as she laid on her side, cuddling into her pillow and blanket as she pretended Harry was right next to her. Luckily, her call time was at ten a.m, so she had a good three hours to talk to him.

“I just don’t know what I’m going to do about these quizzes.”

“Hmm, let’s see. Like, all of them are ruined?”

“Pretty much.”

“Well, you could be honest with them. I’m sure some of them hadn’t read the material, so they might’ve not done so well. So, you could tell them that they were ruined, and just give them a chance to catch up on their readings and study the material.” She advised. “I mean, it’s a quiz—it shouldn’t interfere too much with the teaching and schedule and all the grading, right?”

“Not really…” he answered, thinking about her suggestion, and it was a really great suggestion, might he add. “Yeah, I think I’ll do that. I’d feel absolutely horrible if I made them retake it. I didn’t even want to schedule a quiz on Friday anyways.”

“And that’s what makes you a great teacher,” she said genuinely.

“Thank you, Ci. And thank you for answering, I know things are hectic and our schedules don’t line up.

Plus the time-zones…”

Luci felt her heart sink, a frown etched on her face. She knew she wasn’t texting or trying to call him, and that’s where the guilt crept in. In a way, she felt like she wanted space, like she didn’t want to consistently check up on someone back home. But the more she thought about it, the more she felt terrible because she knew that Harry’s added stress was because she hadn’t spoken to him in a week. She ignored all of the incoming text messages, leaving them unanswered while being in a country she’d never been to before.

Her anxiety was also acting up because of how exhausted she was from flying from one place to another and the jetlag she endured. To add to her exhaustion, she was also overwhelmed with work, causing her to curl into a ball and ignore the rest of the world whenever she got some downtime.

“You shouldn’t have to thank me for answering, Harry. I-I’m sorry I haven’t been talking to you. I’ve just been swamped with work and being tired all the time, and the last thing I wanted to do was talk to you—it’s horrible, I know. Like, I genuinely hate myself for not wanting to, especially with how far apart we are,” she admitted. Harry couldn’t help but feel his heart crack a bit; he hadn’t expected her to feel or say that. He assumed that the time apart had left her itching to see him, just as much as he wanted to see her.

After a few seconds of silence, Harry was unable to put together the exact words he wanted to say because he was so thrown off by what she’d said.

“Harry, I’m sorry if I upset you. You have every right to be angry with me.”

He took a deep breath, shaking his head lightly. “I’m not angry. A bit hurt? Yeah. But I can’t control how you feel, and you can’t control how you feel either. Don’t feel obligated to speak to me, I know you’re busy and all…” His tone wasn’t enthusiastic, but could anyone blame him? His girlfriend just told him that she didn’t feel like talking to him for the entire week, maybe the entire time she was gone.

The switch-up was inevitable. This past week, Luci wanted space and Harry unspokenly gave her that space by not wanting to appear as clingy, but just when she’d disappointed and upset him, all she wanted was to be in the same room he was in, holding him tight.

“Anyways, you should get going.” Luci’s brows furrowed as she looked at the digital clock on the bedside table, reading 8:23 a.m.. “I’ll talk to you, uh, soon.”

And this time, when he unspokenly asked for space, she had given it to him.

“Okay. I’ll talk to you later.” A small pout landed on her mouth. For a moment, neither of them wanted to hang up, not wanting to leave this conversation with such an awkward-filled tension that won’t be able to be fixed until later on. “Harry?” Luci spoke up right before he was about to hang up.

“Yeah?”

“I love you.” She held her breath.

“I love you too, Ci. I’ll see you soon.” Harry hung up the phone as Luci let out the air she was holding in, but she still felt weight on her shoulders.

He was glad that he was able to talk to Luci and that she was able to calm him down with her soothing and soft voice; but that night, he still went to bed with a heavy heart, surrounded by the scent of her on his pillows that she’d left behind.

November 1, 2018

Harry was waiting by baggage claim, waiting for Luci with her favorite bouquet of flowers in his hands. His hands gripped the stems of the flowers, wrinkling the brown paper as he contained the shakiness.

It had been a little over four months since he last saw Luci, and nervous was an understatement. He thought that after the weird and awkward talk in August, things wouldn’t be the same and they were going to end things. But Luci was trying—they both were. She ended up talking to him and calling him any chance that she got, which wasn’t much, but it meant everything to Harry that she was trying. Plus, a little space never really did any harm.

His foot tapped against the polished floor, making a random beat with his boot. People brushed past him, reunited with their loved ones and friends they hadn’t seen in x amount of days; and when he saw the burgundy colored luggage with a black name tag tied around the handle, he knew she was home.

Appearing in slow motion, their eyes met and it felt like they’d been stunned by an electrifying force that compelled them together. Duplicate smiles were spread on their faces, never leaving sight of one another as they tried getting through the crowd of people who were exiting from the international gate. Once they were close enough, Luci held out her arms while Harry met her in the middle, wrapping his strong arms around her waist, hugging her tightly. Luci held him firmly, hands going straight to the bottom of his head as her fingers gently scratched the curls that delicately rested on the back of his neck.

She felt hot kisses on her neck and a happy smile against her shoulder that it felt like he was tattooing it onto her skin. Luci began to pull away, kissing along the side of his neck and to his lips, taking in and savoring the feel of his soft and pink lips.

They simply didn’t care that they were in the middle of the airport, in the middle of baggage claim where everyone could see them because who cared? They weren’t going to see these people tomorrow nor were they going to remember their faces, so they greeted each other in a long and soft kiss where they smiled against one another and held each other tight.

Pulling away, they both giggled before Harry handed her the bouquet of flowers that made her swoon.

“Welcome home, baby.” He pecked her lips once more.

She smelled the flowers, smiling into them as if she were a bee collecting pollen before she wrapped one arm around his neck, pulling him in for another tight hug as she planted a big kiss on his cheek, making him blush.

“I’m home,” Luci said once she pulled away. “Now, please, take me home.” She chuckled, dramatically sighing exhaustively as if she was going to sleep immediately when they got home.

Harry wrapped his arm around her shoulder, pulling her into his side before he led her to the parking garage.

“Let’s go home. New York misses you a lot.”

After a long ride back to Brooklyn, their lips immediately connected right when they entered Luci’s apartment while Harry kicked the door closed with his foot, extending his arm back to make sure it was locked. She quickly but gently set the flowers on the counter, so she could put them into a vase later since she had more important matters on her hands.

As Luci was walking backwards, kissing Harry, he led her to her bedroom. She pulled away, walking past him as she headed for the bathroom before turning back around, facing him.

“What are you doing?” He asked breathlessly.

Luci swiftly removed her sweater, revealing an olive green sports bra. She then pulled her leggings down, kicking them off as she exposed her black cotton panties to him. Taking off her sports bra, she never disconnected eye contact with Harry, driving him wild as he started to grow in his pants. He brought his fingers up to his bottom lip, pinching it in between his fingers as she slowly slid off her underwear. She was completely bare in front of him, her clothes at her feet; Harry inhaled sharply at the sight of her naked, and Luci smirked at his reaction.

“I’m going in for a shower. Wanna wash off hours being on a plane.” She headed into the restroom without another word, leaving Harry standing stunned in the middle of the hallway.

“Does that include me too?” Harry called out.

She chuckled. “Hell yeah, baby. Get in here.” Her voice echoed from the bathroom as she started the shower. Harry rushed, taking off his clothes as the bathroom started to steam up from the temperature of the water.

When he opened the glass door, her back was facing the entrance of the shower as she tilted her head back, allowing the hot water to stream down the valleys and crevices of her body. Harry’s mouth was ajar, cock twitching as he watched her. He closed the door behind him as he stepped into the shower, wrapping his arm around her waist and catching her by surprise as she let out a squeal.

Her back was pressed against his chest, hands roaming around her wet body as he squeezed her breasts. Harry pressed a soft kiss against her shoulder as part of his head was getting wet. Turning them around, the water streams hit his back as he continued to kiss along his neck and shoulder, biting down at her skin. She let out a soft moan at the feel of his lips, extending her arm backwards so her hand was placed on the back of his head.

“Missed you,” she whispered, resting her head on his shoulder, exposing her entire neck. Harry couldn’t pass up the offer to wrap his hand around her neck, squeezing lightly as she slightly moaned.

“Mm, missed you so much more.” Luci turned her head to meet his lips, and she already knew she was going to get a stiff neck later on, but she didn’t care; she wanted to kiss him for as long as possible. His hands trailed down to her clit, making her gasp in his mouth as he started to rub the bud softly, circling his fingers around just like he knew she liked it.

The bathroom was filled with the sounds of heavy breathing, lips kissing, and the shower stream that was hitting their bodies and steaming the air, adding to their passionate tension from when they first were wrapped up around each other.

Harry pulled away, pushing her against the wall while he kissed her shoulder once more, and Luci loved it every time he did that; it was a sweet and simple gesture, but it had complete control to get her riled up. He trailed his kisses along her back, kissing down her spine before he stopped at the top of her ass, biting down gently; Luci held the tiled wall in front of her for stability. Harry slowly licked the flesh of her ass, making his way inwards to her core. His tongue teased and rimmed her hole, making her pulse.

“Harry…” she called out, and he playfully answered ‘yes’ as if he didn’t know what he was doing. She rolled her eyes, gripping the back of his head. “Don’t tease.”

“Alright, alright. Only because I’ve missed you so much and have been dying to taste you again.” He kissed her ass once more before he leaned his head down to lick up from her clit to her wet hole. He sat on his knees, not caring if his knees would ache.

He sucked and licked her clit before inserting a finger into her entrance. The sensation made Luci moan loud; her grasp on his hair tightened as if she was trying to pull the strands out.

“Fuck, baby,” she whined, throwing her head back as she closed her eyes.

Unexpectedly, Harry licked at her tighter and puckered hole, testing if she liked it or not; and he received a moan of ‘yes’ in return, so he continued licking her everywhere before her breath was staggered and she came on his tongue. Harry held her body tightly so she would slip from the water rushing on them.

He slowly turned her around, kissing her lips in a heated passion that could only be received from her. Once Luci regained momentum, she took his cock in her hand, slowly pumping as he rested his forehead against hers, hands on both sides of her cheeks as he breathed heavily. Her other hand fondled his balls, rolling them in her hand, and it was his turn to throw his head back.

As Luci stroked him, she kissed his chest, leaving a few hickies to his collarbones.

“You’re so fuckin’ good, holy shit.” She watched his every reaction; watched him bite his lip into agony, eyes shut closed, and hips unconsciously bucking into her hand. “Don’t wanna come right now.”

The main event was just a slip away, so she let go of him, and he’d already missed the feel of her around him. He connected their lips together; Harry bit her bottom lip as he slightly pulled at him, driving her crazy.

“Fuck me, please,” she pleaded, wrapping her arms around his neck, pulling him the closest he could get as she lifted one leg up, using her leg strength to rest it beside his hip. His cock rested against her stomach, occasionally twitching from the slightest friction it was getting from her skin.

He smirked. “Are you begging?”

She playfully rolled her eyes. “Yeah, I’m begging. So what? I want you to fuck me now,” she said sternly.

“Okay. Wait, need to get a condom-”

She pulled him back. “I've had an IUD for a few years now, and we’re not sleeping with anyone else, right?” She asked teasingly, and he shook his head. “Good because I wanna feel you bare. Need to feel you.”

“Fuck me,” he muttered under his breath. He grabbed a hold of himself, pumping slowly as he gripped the back of her thigh that propped against his hip. Running the tip against her slit, he collected her arousal and orgasm, making her shiver before he slowly slipped himself into her entrance.

Their mouths were wide open once he was fully in. The feel of each other as they were completely bare and raw was an unbelievable feeling that neither of them could decipher.

“So fuckin’ tight.” He was breathless as she squeezed around him, waiting for her to adjust to his size. She muttered a ‘please,’ and Harry started to thrust quicker. Her soft and wet walls hugged him tightly, making him groan louder as he leaned his forehead against her collarbones. Luci’s fingers raked the back of his shoulders

“God, H, you feel so good.” Her head hit the wall behind her, and Harry pulled his head out of her chest.

“Yeah? Tell me how good it feels,” he demanded. Despite having her eyes closed, she could practically see the smirk that landed on his face at the mention of how good he was making her feel. “Tell me, Ci. Look at me and tell me.”

Her eyes fluttered open, meeting his dark jaded eyes. “So good. Could feel you everywhere.” Her words came out in between her breaths, moans, and Harry’s thrusts.

He kissed her. “Tell me more. Tell me everything”

“I’ve missed you inside of me. Thought about you everyday. I would touch myself before I went to bed, and it didn’t help.”

Harry gripped her thigh hard, sure there were going to be bruises forming tomorrow. “Why didn’t it help?” He asked, picking up his pace.

Luci inhaled sharply as she cried out. “Because no one could make me feel good. No one but you.”

“Hmm, that’s right, baby. Only me. Such a good girl.” The tip of his cock brushed against her special spot, and she rolled her eyes back in ecstasy. He repeatedly hit that spot, linking his hands behind her neck for leverage.

“Yes, yes, yes.” Her brows furrowed, biting her lip. Harry leaned down to suck and kick her tits, and Luci felt him slap one of them, making her get the idea of slapping something else, so she said, “Slap me, baby.”

Thinking he meant her ass, he swatted one of the cheeks hard.

“No.” She paused, bringing his hand up to her cheek. “Slap me.” Luci kissed the inside of his hand.

His eyes widened. “Baby…” his thrusts slowed down, and Luci was right on the edge. He knew they talked about it the first time they had sex, and the first few times they had sex, he was testing out the waters on spanking, to which she absolutely loved feeling that certain type of sting.

“Please, want you to.” She looked at him with pleading eyes. “Wanna feel it burn.”

He debated in his head. “You’re sure?” She nodded, and he knew she could do better. “Words, Luciana.”

“Yes, I’m one hundred percent sure. I’ll tell you if it's too much. Just wanna try it out.” She confirmed. The pressure in her stomach felt like she was going to burst, so she started to buck her hips, moving herself on him, making him groan.

“Okay. We need a safe word…just in case.”

“Mango.” Was the first thing that popped into her mind; it was also her favorite fruit.

Harry chuckled. “Alright, mango it is.” He started thrusting again. His hand caressed her cheek as he brought his lips to hers, placing a sweet kiss to her luscious lips. “I love you.”

“And I love you, too. I trust you.”

Those words brought him reassurance, that she trusted only him to do this with, and that made him feel so much better about doing it. He nodded, continuing to fuck her into oblivion. Her eyes began to close and he felt her squeeze around him, making him jolt.

“Hey, look at me. Want you to look at me when you cum.” Her eyes quickly opened, looking deep into his eyes that drove her crazy. “Fuck, you’re so beautiful. So, so beautiful.” Not too hard, he slapped her cheek, making her head swing to the side before she brought it back to look at his face. She had a sly smile on her face, as if she were the villain who would laugh every time the hero punched them. The impact had made her wetter, more eager to come.

“Again.” She demanded, and he complied, slapping her twice more before she told him that she was coming.

“That’s it. Such a pretty girl. Look at you cumming for me.” He kissed her forehead as he slammed his hips into her.

Luci was spent, putting her full weight on the tiles, holding onto Harry’s shoulders, depending on him to keep her up; he wasn’t going to let her go, not ever. He wasn’t going to let her fall because he would catch her over and over again.

“I’m gonna cum…” A throaty moan was released from his mouth.

She grabbed his face, pressing their foreheads together as she said, “Please, cum in me. Want it.”

With her filthy words, Harry let out a harsh breath as he filled her up with his warm spurts of his pleasure, hips jolting as he rode his high out. He quickly kissed her, tongues swirling together as they swallowed each other’s moans.

“Fuck, you’re so good to me.” He mindlessly breathed out. His cock slipped out of her once she brought her leg down to the ground, making her gasp in sensitivity. Soon, she felt the result of his pleasure trickling down her leg, and Harry was sure that was the hottest sight he’d ever seen.

For a few moments, they held one another under the shower—thankful the hot water hadn’t been used entirely while they were fucking. Harry pulled away, cupping her cheeks as he looked at her.

“Hey, you okay?” He asked, and she nodded. “D-Did I slap you too hard?”

Luci shook her head. “No, no. It was perfect, thank you.”

He chuckled, softly rubbing his thumb against her soft cheek that he’d hit a few minutes prior. He placed many kisses to her skin, like he was subsiding the stings with his affection. “Learn more and more about you everyday; whether we’re having sex or not.”

“Hmm, I love you.” She kissed his neck, causing him to wrap his arms around her waist tighter.

“I love you more.”

Finally, they were together again.

November 3, 2018

A stunning red cape-gown dress by Ralph Lauren sat perfectly on Luci’s body as her makeup artists were putting on the finishing touches to her glam.

Today was the premiere for Ocean’s Eight, and nervous was an understatement. She’d been looking forward to these types of events since she was a little girl; watching movie premieres on the television, hoping and dreaming to become someone who walked the red carpet. Time flew by quickly because her dreams were about to come true. All she was missing was her boyfriend.

After their reunion sex in the shower, they called it a night by eating some takeaway from Tasty plates. While her legs were resting on his thighs, she’d asked if he wanted to attend the premiere with her as her special guest. His answer was understandable, but she’d just wish he was next to her to calm her down.

“Luci, please don’t take this the wrong way. I support you in everything that you do, you know that. I-I just don’t know if I’m ready for that. The thought of standing in front of cameras just makes me sick and nauseous. I don’t know…” She understood well, and saw where he was coming from because frankly, as she was getting ready for it, she could be sick any minute.

She told him that it was completely okay, and proceeded with their night.

“And done.” Her stylist, Jacqueline, announced, topping her makeup off with a dust of powder. “Luci, you look amazing.”

“Thank you all so much. Best glam team ever.” The five people in the room clapped and praised her words. A security guard escorted her out to the car that was waiting in front of the hotel, ready to take her to the premiere.

Once she got into the black SUV, her driver greeted her. “Hello, Ms. Suki. I’m Philip. I’ll be driving you around today.”

“Hi, Philip. How are you?”

“Doing very well, Ms. Suki. How are you?”

“Oh, please call me Luci. But I’m okay—a bit nervous, if I’m honest.”

“It’s an exciting time. You’ll do great.” Philip provided words of encouragement, which she was thankful for. Luci learned that Philip was from Spain, and had been living in New York since he was ten. She asked if he missed Spain, and he answered with. “Sometimes. I was quite young when we moved, so I didn’t really know any better. But the one thing I do miss is my family and how they speak—I didn’t know I could miss someone’s accent so much until I learned more about my culture. And here, I wasn’t surrounded by that. I’ve missed my abuela calling me ‘Felipe,’ which is my actual name.” Philip pulled up to the curb where there were countless media people with large professional cameras that were flashing brightly. Philip had definitely distracted Luci’s nervous thoughts as she hadn’t realized they were at the premiere already until he parked and dropped her off. “Goodluck, Ms. Luci. I can't wait to see the film!”

Someone from the outside of the car opened the door for her, and before she stepped out, she said ‘goodbye’ to her driver. “Thank you for driving me. I wish you well, Felipe.” She gave him a smile, trying her best to perfect the accent; Felipe looked at her with an appreciative smile, holding his hand to his heart. He hadn’t heard anyone say or try to say his real name ever since he moved, and for that, he will be forever grateful and honored to have met Luciana Suki.

Camera flashes relentlessly went off in front of the Ziegfeld Theatre in midtown Manhattan. Luci balled her hands into fists as she stepped onto the blue carpet, the cameras directed towards her. She looked at Thea, who had met her at the premiere since she was her plus one, and Thea gave her an encouraging nod before Luci took a deep breath and walked in front of the white backdrop that had a large picture of the cast portraying their character in front of it. Shouts of direction were thrown her way, asking her to give their camera a big smile, and the only thing she felt was overwhelmed at everyone shouting at her, but she masked her emotions well. She was an actress, afterall.

Harry was watching a live stream on his laptop, and he clapped to himself once he saw Luci step foot onto the carpet and in front of the cameras. He thought she looked absolutely beautiful, and he’d told her so when she sent him pictures of the entire look, saving them to his phone. He smiled to himself as he watched her, and he noticed a certain expression of uncomfortableness, making his smile vanish quickly. With a worried expression, he watched until she made it to the end of the red carpet, meeting with some interviewers, waving at fans who didn’t know who she was, and into the theatre. He let out a deep breath, glad that she was able to get through the media portion for the premiere, but he couldn’t help but feel guilty.

On cue, his phone began to ring, and he saw that it was his mother, so he answered with an unenthusiastic tone.

“Hi, mum.”

“Harry, hi. How are you, darling?” Anne asked, cup of tea in hand.

“I’m doing okay. How are you?” He tried picking his mood up from off the ground for his mum, but he wasn’t successful at it.

“I’m doing great. We miss you. Now, do you wanna tell me how you’re really feeling? Could practically feel your mood all the way over here.” Anne tried making a joke to pick up the mood. “Does it have to do with Luci?” Harry had mentioned Luci right when she’d move in across the hall. From then on, it was like he couldn’t stop talking about her; the moment they became friends and when they started to hang out more with one another, to when he asked her to be his girlfriend—he never missed a phone call with Anne when he didn’t mention her. Of course, he told her about her career and how she was making her way up the ladder; Anne was quite excited about that because she would get to watch her movies, but then she put the pieces together and figured out that only meant Luci was apart from her son.

Harry took a deep breath, sighing. “Luci’s at her premiere right now, and I was just watching the live stream for it. She looked so beautiful.” Harry never failed to mention how gorgeous she looked, and it made Anne’s heart smile. “Two days ago she asked me if I wanted to join her for the premiere, and I said no. I said no, mum!”

Her brows furrowed. “Why’d you do that?”

“Because I was nervous to be in front of the cameras. I knew I’d have to walk the carpet with her because she’d want me to, but just thinking about it, I don’t know if I’d be able to handle it. But watching the live stream just a few minutes ago, I saw how nervous she was; she didn’t have anyone beside her. It’s her first premiere ever, and I wasn’t there because I put my feelings before hers because I was selfish.” He felt an immense amount of regret in his chest as he started to cry. Luci wouldn’t get a ‘first’ premiere again, and he missed the chance to be with her, to celebrate a huge accomplishment.

Anne’s heart sank at the sound of him crying. “I’m sure she won’t be too upset at you because she seemed pretty understanding of it.”

“Of course she did—she had to. Things were weird at one point when she was in Singapore, and she’d only just gotten back home two days ago, so I doubt that she wanted to argue. I…I just feel so bad.”

“Well, the only thing that would fix it would be to talk to her. Tell her you’re sorry and how you feel. You’ve got to communicate with each other.” She advised.

The art of communication between them wasn’t entirely horrible; for one, it was difficult to communicate as it was when Luci was always working and in a different place with a fifteen hour time difference. Two, they were in a new relationship—no matter if they’d been together for ten months, they were still a new couple because they’d been separated and apart longer than they were physically together. So, they were still learning and figuring out how to do that with each other.

“Okay. I will…” he agreed.

Moving on from that topic, Anne told him about work and the cats, and how much she missed him. He told his mother that he’d see her on Christmas, which she’d been ecstatic about having her two children in the same house again.

“Maybe you could bring Luci?” Anne subtly slipped in the idea to him.

Harry chuckled. “I’m not sure. She goes back home for Christmas.”

“Alright, just a suggestion. Make sure she knows that she’s welcomed.”

“I’ll be sure to tell her.”

After bidding each other goodbye for the past ten minutes, they finally managed to get off the phone after a few more conversations.

Now, all he had to do was wait for Luci to get home and hoped she wasn’t mad at him.

It was around eight in the evening when someone knocked on Harry’s door. He was cooking a later dinner for himself as a spontaneous idea had entered his mind to make homemade pasta. So, his hands were covered in flour, and he was lucky he had an apron on because his clothes would have flour all over it.

Washing his hands, he headed for the door, wondering who could be knocking right now. When he opened the door, there she was: his Luci, standing in a beautiful red gown as she held her clutch in her two hands in front of her stomach. Her hair, makeup, and composure was absolutely stunning. She held herself with grace, with poise.

He was stunned. “Luciana…”

“Hi, Harry.” She smiled. His eyes raked up and down her body, completely stupefied by her beauty; the contrast of feeling intimidated under his stare only ignited a sense of confidence for how he was looking at her. “Not gonna let me in?” Harry quickly moved to the side, opening the door wider for her as she nonchalantly walked into his apartment as the train on her dress trailed after her.

A smirk landed on her face knowing Harry was looking at her as she walked in, and that ultimately boosted her confidence. He waited until the material of her dress was fully inside and not within the door’s swinging motion so it wouldn’t get caught under the door.

She turned around, facing him and his eyes never left her. “How are you, my love?” Luci had a smile on her face that Harry would never get over; it permanently remained in his dreams.

From what Harry could tell, Luci wasn’t mad or disappointed; she looked delighted and relieved to see him.

“I’m doing better now that you’re here—and not that I’m complaining whatsoever, but isn’t the afterparty still going on?” He wondered.

“It is. I only stayed for an hour or two. I’d rather be here, though.”

Harry blushed. “I’m glad you’re here. You look…fuck, Luciana, you look absolutely beautiful.” He rubbed his forehead as if her beauty had completely overwhelmed him, made him feel lightheaded.

Luci was going to get changed before she knocked on Harry’s door, but she wanted him to see her in her gown, and his reaction and all the sweet compliments were totally worth staying in her dress.

“Thank you, H. That’s very sweet.”

“How was the premiere?” He asked; Luci took a seat on his couch, taking off her shoes before she propped them up on his coffee table as Harry followed, sitting right next to her. He grabbed her legs, bringing them across his thighs as he began massaging her feet, up her calves, and trailing up thighs—close to her inner thighs.

Luci shifted, getting comfortable, wanting to clench her thighs together with how good his hands felt on her. “It was good! I was pretty nervous, but I had fun. It’s, like, kinda weird watching myself on the big screen. I don’t think I would get used to that.” She chuckled, leaning her head on the back of the couch. “I should get the professional pictures tomorrow, and maybe we could put them in our scrapbook?”

Harry nodded. “I’d love that. I’m glad you had a good time.” He smiled softly before he went completely silent, stopping the movements of his hands. Luci could tell something was bothering him and had been for a while now.

“Hey.” She reached over to touch his hand. “Talk to me. You look like you have a lot on your mind.”

“I was watching the live stream of the premiere, and I just wanted to say I’m sorry.” Luci’s brows furrowed in confusion. “I-I should’ve been there with you. I mean, I was completely selfish for not being by your side for your first premiere. I was thinking of my own feelings and how I would feel being surrounded by the chaos when I didn’t even think about how you might’ve felt. And I regret it so much. I’m so sorry.”

He brought her hands to his lips, pressing multiple soft kisses to the inside and back of her hands; Luci slightly frowned, shaking her head.

She placed her hands on the back of his neck, placing a kiss on his forehead. “No, no. It’s okay. Hey, I’m not mad. Don’t beat yourself up.”

“But…you’re supposed to be mad.”

“I’m not supposed to be anything besides yours.”

He nodded as his heart fluttered at her words. There was no look of annoyance or worry about how he politely declined her invitation.

“Just know that I regret my decision on not going with you.”

“It’s okay. There will be plenty of premieres—hopefully—but for now, it’s in the past and we can’t change that.” Harry let out a breath of relief. “Now, what are you making? I wanna join in.” She changed the subject to a much lighter one, hoping to get his mind to stop putting blame on him. Harry pushed his tears back, leading her to the kitchen, and she was excited to see the rolled out dough on the countertop. She clapped, telling Harry that she was going to get changed.

She came back in a pair of white pajama pants that had little chicks on it and a black sweater; her makeup was wiped off, jewelry was taken off and put away safely on her side of Harry’s bedside table. He looked at her in awe—the same look he had when she was dressed and glammed up; his look for her would never change.

Tears and worries had been forgotten as they rolled out the pasta dough, making different kinds of shapes and sizes. They played the ‘Mamma Mia!’ soundtrack—since that was Luci’s go-to soundtrack since the movie was a “cinematic masterpiece” as she should say—singing and harmonizing They opened a bottle of wine and raised their glasses to love and more opportunities.

November 5, 2018

“Okay, since your birthday is in three days, and I can’t keep a surprise to save my life…I booked us a dinner reservation in the evening.”

Luci looked up from the November issue of the Vogue magazine that she was mindlessly flipping through. Her eyes lit up. “Really? Where?”

“I need something to surprise you with, so you’ll know when we get there.” Harry kissed her cheek. Pouting, she gave her best puppy eyes. “Not gonna work, baby, but nice try.”

Her face switched back to neutral. “Fine. You’re lucky I love you.”

“Yeah, I know you do,” he teased.

“I really do.” She put the magazine down on the table in front of her, climbing on his lap. “Like, a lot.”

“And I love you more. Now, how about I give you an extra and early birthday gift?” He asked, rubbing his hands down her back and to her ass.

Her hips slightly grinded down on him, causing him to fidget. “Oh, yeah? And what would that entail?”

“Let’s go to the bedroom and find out.”

Before she got the chance to answer, he unexpectedly ran to the bedroom, dragging her along as she squealed. Their smiles hadn’t disappeared from their faces, and they were hopelessly happy and in love.

November 8, 2018

The school bell rang, making everyone pack up their belongings as they headed out the classroom door. Usually, Harry would stay back and get some grading done, but today, he had errands to run before his date with Luci for her birthday. He’d been so excited since the moment he told her that they had plans, which he was lucky that he hadn’t spoiled the entire evening right then and there.

For her birthday, Harry had planned to take her out to a nice restaurant—not too fancy since fancy wasn’t really their vibe, but it was nice enough that they needed to dress up. After their meal, he planned to take her to the arcade where he would win her an arcade ring from one of those claw-machine games—that ate people’s quarters quickly—were almost impossible to win anything from, but he was determined. The arcade ring could scare her away as she may think it would be the next step to their relationship but it wasn’t anything too serious because neither of them were ready for that nor had it been discussed. He’d love to marry Luci, though, if he was being honest. They hadn’t even been together for a year, but he just had a certain feeling in his heart that she was the one—a feeling he hadn’t felt all of his life and in his past relationships.

After their arcade shenanigans, Harry would take her to a café that closed later than usual, where they would share a Danish to satisfy their sweet tooth, and have coffee or tea that would make them wired so they would have to stay up to have romantic and sweet sex; and in between rounds, they would eat the birthday cake Harry bought her.

He had it all planned out, and he was eager to see the excitement and surprise on her face.

Putting his folders and belongings into his bag, he said goodbye to the last student who was walking out of his classroom. With a big smile on his face, he rushed as he was packing up, seeing as he was in a time crunch. He closed his door and made his way down the hall before he was stopped.

“Hey, Harry! Wait up.” Harry turned around, seeing Carina jog towards him as her heels clicked against the ground.

“Hi, Carina. What’s up?”

“I was wondering if you wanted to go out tonight? My friends and I are going to this bar, and they have live music there, so I figured you’d be interested in that.” Her hands locked behind her back as she briefly looked down at her feet before looking up with hopeful eyes.

“Oh, uh, thank you for the offer.” Carina had the face of rejection…again. “But today is my girlfriend’s birthday and we’re going out tonight.”

“Right, got it. Girlfriend.” She stated. If Carina was honest, she didn’t Harry had a girlfriend, and she felt like her constant invitation to hang out made her look dumb.

“I’m sorry. I should get going.” He started to back towards the exit of the school as he waved.

“Yeah, have a good night. If by some miraculous reason you change your mind, call me. We’ll be out all night. You can even bring your girlfriend.” Despite the fact that she’d gotten rejected three times and there was a girlfriend in the picture, she’d kept her hopes up. She was just going to stand on the sidelines, and somehow, one day, Harry would stop playing the game and join her.

“Uh, sure.” He waved once more before heading out. Without much thought to Carina’s invitation, he carried on to his schedule and he stopped by the stand-up shop on the sidewalk that was close to his school to buy Luci’s favorite bouquet of flowers. He saw that the ones he’d given her when she arrived home a week ago were still alive and fresh, but she mentioned that she wanted to put some in her bedroom—to brighten up her room. So, no harm in getting another bouquet of flowers. The vendor who owned the shop had noticed he was a regular, which he was grateful for, and told Harry that his lady must be a very lucky one since he’d always made sure to get her the same one. But Harry quickly countered that he was the lucky one.

Next, he stopped by the bakery to buy her a birthday cake. Last year, he hadn’t gotten one for her and she ended up blowing candles from the bowl of ice cream they ate later that night, so he figured a proper birthday cake would top it off. He’d pre-ordered the cake a few days before—a small circle cookies n’ cream ice cream cake, enough to fit both of them. He bought the numbers ‘2’ and ‘7’ and had the baker write ‘Happy Birthday, Luci!’ in red frosting—her favorite color.

When he was finished with everything he needed to do, it was nearing four-thirty and the train ride back to home during rush hour would be dreadful, so he headed back home. He was glad the bakery shop had given him a brown paper bag that was big enough to put the cake in because he couldn’t risk the train suddenly stopping and having the cake fly across the subway cart.

It was five-thirty when he opened his front door. Their reservation was at six-fifteen, so he needed to get changed and properly ready for his girlfriend, and then he’d knock on her door.

A black button down shirt sat perfectly on his torso as the top two buttons were undone, showing his cross pendant, a peek of his tattoos, and the-barely-there but growing chest hair. He wore cream colored pants that fit him perfectly, flaring at the bottom and stopping at the perfect length to show his black Gucci boots that he’d been eyeing for a while and saved up for. He messed around with his hair; it had grown much longer and he hadn’t cut it since last year, but it showcased his curls impeccably.

Taking out the cake, he lit the candles up, placing them out the empty spaces around the writing before he carefully took the cake and flowers across the hall, knocking on her door.

He waited a moment before knocking again, and even then, he didn’t hear the familiar shuffling inside that always made him chuckle because Luci hated making him wait. After waiting for another minute or two, he knocked once more before he walked back inside of his own apartment, blowing out the candles before setting them on the table. He grabbed the spare key that she gave him and walked back to her door. He was starting to get worried now, and all he wanted to know was if she was okay because who knew what could have happened inside her apartment. So, he unlocked the door and let himself in.

“Luci?” He called out, slowly walking through the hallway. He took a glance at the main portion of the apartment, but it was empty. He then made his way to her bedroom and bathroom, and there were no signs or traces of the birthday girl. Furrowing his brows, he wondered where she could be. Harry took out his phone and called, texted, and sent her voicemails at least ten to fifteen times each.

He sat on her couch waiting for Luci to walk through the door, saying that she was sorry for being late. But as the minutes and hours went by, she didn't show; there were no texts or calls—nothing. It was nine at night when he decided to go back to his apartment. He waited for her for four hours, and the only thing that he was thinking about at the moment was: she forgot or she didn’t want to spend her birthday with him. Either one was fine, all she had to do was shoot him a call or text, and then he wouldn’t be so mad or annoyed.

The ice cream cake was melting on the table as it’d gone through hours of not being supervised by the cold freezer. He thought about just throwing the entire thing away, but then he remembered the hard work the bakers had gone through to make this cake, so he stored it in the freezer and wiped down the table before grabbing his phone, finding the person he wanted to contact and hit call.

“Hello?”

“Hey. Are you still out?” He asked.

“Yeah, we’re at Cherry on Lafayette in Soho.” The person on the other side of the call said, smiling, glad that Harry was going to join them.

“Okay, I’ll meet you there.”

Harry didn’t have a clue as to where Luci was, who or if she was with anyone, or if she was okay. All he wanted was for Luci to be okay, that’s all that mattered to him. Perhaps also an explanation as to why she hadn’t shown. But if she was going to be out all night, then he would too.

With that, Harry grabbed his keys and headed out.

Happy Fucking Birthday Luci.

It was 1:15 a.m when Harry turned the corner of his hallway. He wasn’t sure if going out was the best idea in the world. His mind seemed to be on auto-pilot, as it had the control to rile himself up, making him angry at his failed plan to make Luci’s birthday special to anxiety-driven thoughts that made him insecure, wondering if he did or said anything wrong to her that caused her to not want to spend time with him. He stood outside of his door, leaning his forehead against the doorframe as he fished for his keys in his pocket; at the same time his phone buzzed.

Taking it out, he knew it wasn’t Luci, but it was Jeff.

Did you get home okay?

Typing back, he replied with Yeah, standing in front of my door right now. Thanks for tonight.

Of course, man. Anytime. Goodluck with Luci.

Harry didn’t reply anymore. Instead, he put his phone away and took out his keys.

Jeff had invited Harry out for drinks with their other friend, Mitch, but Harry declined, telling them that he had plans with Luci. But since those plans didn’t pull through, he joined his friends from uni, which wasn’t the smartest idea because all he did was drink his feelings away and he hated doing that. He had ranted to Jeff and Mitch about how his night did a complete one-eighty as he hadn’t expected to be sitting at the bar with his friends but instead, in bed with his girlfriend.

Jeff was Harry’s best friend, and he was his first friend he’d met when he was at UCLA, and they both had the idea to move to New York after college, so they did it together. A year into living in New York, Jeff had met Mitch, and they’d got along so well that Jeff decided to keep him around as a friend and introduced him to Harry. All three of them had been a group of three for two years, and they’d been lucky finding one another.

Another pair of shoes had walked down the hall, making Harry turn his head to see who was coming.

And in a gorgeous evergreen dress that landed above her knees, Luci was walking down the hall. If it was any day or any situation, Harry would have bedroom eyes, undressing her from head to toe before pulling her in for a kiss. But it wasn’t, and he was annoyed and pissed.

Luci was fiddling with her keys as she giggled to herself once her eyes were set on Harry. His brows were furrowed as he watched her, and she didn’t seem to care about the extra presence in the hallway—let alone, the fact that it was her boyfriend.

“Where’ve you been?” Harry asked in a quite demanding tone. Luci scoffed as if she was annoyed, and Harry was shocked that she was the one that was irritated.

“Harry, not now.” She hadn’t even turned around to face him, not even to apologize for not showing up; she just continued trying to find the right key and keeping herself up on the poorly chosen heels she’d worn for the night that made her heel blister.

“Not now? The fuck you mean ‘not now?’ Did you forget we had plans?” Luci turned around, and Harry could clearly see that she was drunk—not to the point of knocking out, but it seemed like she was coming down from being at that point because she clearly managed to get back home in one piece without someone helping her. “Where’ve you been, Luci?” He asked once more.

“I’ve been out.”

“Yeah, I figured,” he said sarcastically. “Where?”

“Went out with Nina to a club somewhere in Manhattan. Had a few…a lot.” She chuckled at the memory of her night.

“Did you get my calls? My texts?”

“Harry…I get you’re my boyfriend, but I don’t need to tell you my every move.” Luci rolled her eyes, huffing. Her drunk mind was going against all respect she had for the man in front of her. “Seems like you’ve been out too, but you don’t see me questioning you.” She pointed at him.

The disappointment in his face never left. “I get that, and frankly, I don’t want to know your every move. But I told you that we had plans. The least you could do is call me to cancel, but no, you stood me up.” He tried to hide the sadness in his voice but it was transparent. Luci clearly heard it quite clearly, making her heart sink. “I understand that it’s your birthday and you could do whatever you want, but if you didn’t want to spend it with me then you could’ve just said so; if you weren’t gonna make it on time, you could’ve just said so.” He paused, taking a breath. “I-I was standing in the hallway for ten minutes with a cake, and waited for you inside your apartment for four hours.”

Guilt was suddenly thrown at Luci as she looked down at her feet and curled her lips in. Tears had glossed over her eyes, but she denied them to stream down her face because she didn’t deserve to cry, she didn’t deserve to act like the victim in this situation. She kept her eyes to her feet and hands; she couldn’t even look him in the eye or else she'd let out a loud sob.

“Harry, I’m sorry…” she started, testing her limits as she looked up at him. “I should’ve called.”

“Yeah, you should’ve,” he said sternly. There was an awkward pause, neither of them not knowing what to say. Harry was exhausted from overthinking and all the emotions that had gone through his head, but it gave him a piece of mind knowing that Luci arrived home safely and in one piece, so he didn’t have any other reason as to why he should be standing in the hallway. “I hope you had a good birthday.” Was all he said before he walked back inside of his apartment and shut the door, not giving her a chance to respond.

Luci sighed, letting out the sobs that she’d been holding in before she knew that she’d made a big mistake.

November 21, 2018

Luci opened her door to her family, greeting her excitedly. They hugged her tightly before pushing past her and inside of her apartment. Beatrice and Ren had asked Luci if they could stay at her place for Thanksgiving, and Luci wasn’t going to say no to that. They’d arrived a day before so her parents could prepare dinner as they didn’t want to rush for tomorrow. Luci had gotten them all of their groceries that they needed for the dinner, insisting that she’d buy it at the beginning of the week since the stores would most likely be packed the closer it got to Thanksgiving.

“I’m so happy you’re all here,” she told them. Beatrice looked up from the cutting board, smiling brightly.

“Well, Ana, if we hadn’t come here, you had to come to us.” Nathan stated jokingly, putting her arm around her shoulder.

Luci was happy Nathan wasn’t working during the Thanksgiving week and was able to join their parents on the trip. She’d missed all of them being in the same room; Luci had visited them before she left for Singapore, but it was only a brief day where Nathan wasn’t able to see her, so she was ecstatic her brother was there with her.

“Yeah, and it’s fun being in a star’s home.” Ren teased.

Luci giggled, shaking her head at the joke. “Barely a star, Pa.”

“Are you kidding? You definitely are a star! Already filmed for two blockbuster-hit movies all within a year. You’re moving up, Lulu.” Ren’s encouraging words made her smile; she always admired how her father was always so uplifting and optimistic.

“I agree, Lucky. And there’s many more opportunities to come, I can tell you that.” Beatrice pitched in, not looking up from the vegetables that she was chopping with the sharp knife. Luci smiled, grabbing the small piece of carrot that she cut up before popping it into her mouth. As a mother could read their children’s minds, Beatrice noticed that Luci wasn’t herself. Usually, Luci would be very talkative and interactive when she was with her family, but now, she was quiet. “You okay, Luci?” Her mother asked.

The only reasonable thing she could do, while Luci didn’t want to ruin their night, was to tell her mother a little white lie.

Luci nodded. “I’m fine, Ma.” Deciding not to press her daughter any further, all Beatrice did was nod, taking her word for it but she’ll ask once more when the time was right.

In all honesty, Luci wasn’t fine, which was obvious given her and Harry’s situation and the place that they were in at the moment. Ever since that run-in the night she got home from her spontaneous birthday adventure with Nina and some friends, he hadn’t talked to her much. He’d talk to her when he had to, when he didn’t have a choice; and it was quite hard to avoid your neighbor, especially a neighbor who was always looking through the peep-hole for your whereabouts and knew his exact schedule.

She missed Harry, and she didn’t know how long his disappointment for her would last.

The Suki family gathered around Luci’s coffee table, eating their traditional Thanksgiving foods; they shared laughter and stories. When Luci moved to New York, she was so afraid of being alone without her family, but she came to realize that the reunions were always so exciting and fun because they talked like they hadn’t seen each other in years.

“Luci, is Harry coming by?” Ren asked. Luci had told them about her and Harry’s relationship when they’d been together for two months. It was during a group FaceTime when Luci had just woken up and was getting ready to leave for work. She was groggy and half asleep, as it was already noon on the East Coast—telling them that she’d visited Harry for his birthday, which caused an uproar. They were supportive nonetheless.

At the sound of Harry’s name, she gulped, taking her time to chew and swallow her food before she answered her father. “Uh, no, I don’t think so,” she responded, which wasn’t technically a lie because she didn’t know of Harry’s whereabouts.

“Ah, that’s too bad. We’d love to meet him properly. The last and only time we met him was at your first show last year, and you two weren’t even together yet! Crazy how time flies by, but anyways, he was a nice guy—would love to have a chat with him again.” Luci pointed her eyes at Ren, knowing what that chat could entail. “What? I’m not gonna corner him. I won’t hesitate to do so, but so far, he’s treating you well, so I can’t complain.”

He’s treating me well, but I hadn’t been treating him the same, Luci thought to herself.

On cue, there was a strong and loud knock on the door, which startled the family. Luci looked around with wide eyes before she got up from her seat and headed towards the door. Looking through the peep-hole, she saw Harry, which was a surprise.

She opened the door. “Hey-”

“What is this?” Harry interrupted. Luci stepped into the hallway, shutting the door behind her. He held his phone up to her face, and she scanned the article. Her eyes progressively widened as she quickly read it.

Presented on his phone was a thread of text messages from some woman that had sent Harry pictures of her and Nina on Luci’s birthday, dancing on the tables of a bar in Tribeca. There was another picture of her and Samuel; she had her head thrown back, laughing at something that he said but she was too drunk to remember. Another picture was when Samuel leaned into her ear, whispering something that she hadn’t had a clue about. If she was being completely honest, the pictures looked intimate; they were in close proximity because of the loud music and she noticed Samuel’s eyes sparkling as he looked at her.

Harry’s face was neutral and emotionless, but the fact that he showed no reaction or emotion only terrified her more because she knew behind the inexpressive face, he held anger inside.

“Where did you-”

“It doesn’t matter where I got this from. Now, tell me…what the fuck is this?”

“Harry…please let me explain.”

“I’ll give you five seconds to start explaining or else I’ll lose it-” The door behind her opened, revealing Beatrice.

“Harry!” She exclaimed, as if she hadn’t heard the loud voices from inside the apartment.

He immediately put his phone down, and if he wasn’t so shy in front of cameras, then he’d definitely hit the nail in the entertainment industry because he was quick to put up a front and mask his emotions that Luci was amazed at how fast he was able to do that.

“Beatrice, hello. It’s nice to see you again.” He smiled.

“We were actually just talking about you! Luci mentioned that you weren’t stopping by.” Luci closed her eyes; she loved her mother, she really did, but she really needed her to not talk.

“Did she?” Harry asked, amusing her.

“Yeah. Did you want to come in? We have plenty of food.”

Despite all feelings against Luci at the moment, she was still his girlfriend, and the last thing he wanted to do was be rude in front of her family. So, he told Beatrice ‘yes’ before walking past Luci and into her apartment.

It felt like it’d been ages since he was at her place—the unfortunate event of playing the waiting game. The air felt different, and for a momentary thought, it didn’t feel like home, but he assumed he’d only been thinking that because of everything that was happening between them.

Ren and Nathan greeted him excitedly, like the universe was listening to their conversation and had decided to bring Harry to Luci’s front door. Harry helped himself to a plate of food as his mouth watered at the aroma and sight of homemade food before joining the bunch on the couch.

They all chatted quite well; there were no awkward moments in between. Ideally, Luci would’ve loved this moment if it were any other time. Seeing Harry communicate and laugh with her family should make her heart swoon, but her heart didn’t have the ability to do that, as of now, because all she was thinking and worried about was Harry’s reaction and how he felt when he saw that particular article.

“Harry, I’m assuming you already saw Ocean’s Eight?” Nathan asked.

He nodded. “Yeah, I did. Luci’s…great, isn’t she? Like, proper talented. No wonder she was casted so quickly for her second movie.” Even though he held an ample amount of irritation towards her, he would never talk badly about Luci.

Harry looked at her, sitting beside him, finding her eyes already looking at him with a small smile on her face as if she was thanking him for always saying kind things about her; he turned away quickly before she got any ideas.

After a few more conversations and a pie for dessert, they all decided to call it a night. Harry thanked them all for letting him be the addition to their Thanksgiving dinner, and Beatrice had told him that he was welcomed any time for the November holiday, even though he didn’t celebrate it.

“I’m gonna walk him out.” Luci announced, but no one really listened as they cleaned up.

They headed out her door before Harry walked into his apartment, not bothering to close the door because Luci was following him. Finally, they were alone and had time for a decent conversation. Nerves crept onto her skin because all she could think about was how this conversation could end; they could talk it out and he would eventually forgive her, or he could break up with her and that would be the end of Luci and Harry. And for the first time, she hated the butterflies that erupted in her stomach; she hated the nervous feeling she felt in her chest; she hated the pounding of her heart as she looked at Harry because they were bad nerves, not the ones that made her feel giddy.

“I’m gonna give you a chance to explain. I don’t want to let this slide nor do I want to assume anything, so you’re going to explain everything that happened that night because the least you could do is that.” Harry crossed his arms as he spoke; the sight was intimidating.

Luci nodded, understanding. “Okay.” Harry didn’t say anything else, he sat on his couch as he waited for her to begin; Luci took a deep breath in. “So, Nina texted me and told me to go to her place for some day drinking because it was my birthday and she missed me, so I agreed to go. She texted me at noon and I got there around one, and there were a few other people there—already wasted. I didn’t know what the occasion was because I doubted those other people knew it was my birthday.”

“Other people?” Harry asked.

“Yeah, Samuel and some of Nina’s friends that I don’t know.”

“Samuel as in that guy you used to be with?” Harry also couldn’t forget about that time he saw both of them in the hallway, watching Samuel kiss her cheek. Without him fully knowing, he was jealous; he hated how much that simple gesture affected him.

Luci gulped. “Yeah. He has a girlfriend—Daisy, remember?” He inhaled, nodding. “I was surprised he was there, too—I didn’t know he was gonna be there. Anyways, we started drinking for hours, I’m pretty sure. I’d completely lost track of time because of how drunk I was already. But I knew it was late because it was already pitch black outside. Everyone wanted to go to a club that night, and I said ‘yes,’ but before we left, Nina and her friends were up in her room doing lines, and they offered me…”

Harry furrowed his brows concerningly. “Did you?”

“No, no! I didn’t. That part I remember because I didn’t want to be involved in that stuff. So, I sat back and waited for them. I must’ve fallen asleep for a little bit because Samuel woke me up and told me that we were leaving.”

Throughout her and Nina’s friendship—Luci didn’t think they were that close as Nina thought they were—she wouldn’t have guessed that Nina was using. But she figured that was the reason why Samuel was there, to provide them with a stash. It was quite a shock to Luci, even in her drunken state. Nina’s friends had continuously asked Luci if she wanted to try it, to go up into the bathroom and line it up on the cold counter by the sink, but Luci declined, telling them that she was okay and that she would wait for them. Paying no mind to her, they all went upstairs; Luci heard laughter coming from the second floor along with slight moaning after each line. She put herself to sleep, which her drunkenness helped; and for what seemed like hours, Samuel had woken her up and they left for the club.

“Okay, so the picture of you and Samuel? What’s that about?” Harry questioned.

If Luci could remember every single word from that conversation, then she would gladly tell him, but she doesn’t; she only remembered bits and pieces of that night before she went home. But she did know that nothing but a friendly chat occurred. “We were just talking, I swear. Nothing else happened. I remember he was apologizing for how he left things and he was telling me that he was happy about all the opportunities that I was given, and he talked about Daisy; that was it.” She paused, waiting for Harry to respond, but he stayed quiet. “And then I went home, realized that I missed our date and I was so mad at myself, and I know I shouldn’t have been annoyed or acted like a bitch to you because I had no right to act like that because you didn’t deserve it. I’m so sorry.” She apologized genuinely.

Luci had been beating herself up over what she did, and Harry noticed. He was good at reading her mind quite well, reading her like a book. He knew that she didn’t regret going out because she missed going out freely with her friends, but what she regretted was not going home earlier so she could make it just in time for their date; she regretted not contacting Harry, telling him that she was out or that she was going to be late so he didn’t have to wait for a night of anger and loneliness. He knew that much. If she hadn’t been so regretful, then this situation would’ve turned out very different, but she simply made a mistake, and Harry wasn’t going to let her beat herself up over that. People make mistakes. It happens.

“Okay…” He simply said. Luci looked dumbfounded over his words and how he felt. “It’s okay. We’re okay.” She let out the biggest breath of relief before wrapping her arms around his waist, laying her head against his chest. It’d been a very long two weeks since she was in his arms, since she’d heard his heartbeat close to her ear, and she never wanted to go a day without them. Luci had missed Harry; although he thinks he missed her more.

She tilted her head up. “I’m so sorry.” Tears filled her eyes.

“It’s okay.” He rubbed her back in reassurance, kissing her forehead. The slightest touch of his lips on her skin made a chill run down her spine; the familiar electric force had shocked her in the best and relieving way.

They stayed in each other’s arms for a while, not letting go of one another as if they were compensating for the time that was lost when they weren’t in each other’s hold, time that was wasted. After a while, Luci lifted her head up again, exhaustedly looking deeply into Harry’s eyes; he could see how tired she was since she hadn’t gotten a decent amount of sleep since their argument.

“Can I sleep here with you?” She asked hesitantly.

“What about your family?”

“They’re okay. I slept on an air mattress anyway because Nathan took the couch.” Harry slightly smiled at that. He loved how she was so selfless when it came to her family. He could tell just how much love she had for them just by simple gestures and how she admiringly talked about them.

“Okay, let’s go to sleep.”

He led her to his bedroom as they both climbed in under the sheets, pressing their bodies close to one another as a way to warm each other up. Their hearts were beating incredibly hard against their chests that poured out so much love, never once stopping the overload. They looked at each other, admiring the other’s features that they had memorized. If someone had asked them to draw a portrait of their significant love, they would draw each other with perfect precision.

“I love you. I always will.” Luci said within the midst of appreciating one’s art.

“I love you too.”

They quietly and slowly drifted off to sleep. Luci was the first to meet her slumber, and as Harry watched her as he scratched her head, watching the way she would deeply inhale and exhale, he then fell asleep.

That night, their sleep was undistracted and peaceful, and one of the best night’s rest they’d ever gotten within the past two weeks without the knowledge of the storm that was coming.

December 28, 2018

The indescribable bliss and love had lasted for thirty-six days until shit broke loose again.

For thirty-six days, Harry and Luci laughed, made love, spent their days together, and simply enjoyed the other’s presence. Their argument was long forgotten and in the past; Harry had forgiven her for everything she’d done and said that night on her birthday, and all was good again.

They were separated during Christmas; Harry went back home to Manchester as Luci went to Massachusetts. They considered spending the holiday with one another, but it wouldn’t have worked out since Harry’s family was in a completely different country. Luci, a person who can’t stand not seeing her family during the holiday, was thinking about going to England with Harry since he’d told her so many times that Anne would love to meet her and Gemma in person, but he couldn’t take her away from her family. So, he told her that there will be another time to do so, just not during a busy time.

Despite the time off, Luci was getting calls from Thea and Samantha, asking her if she’d want to work again in the next year, which Luci said an obvious yes to, so they booked her an audition for a television series that was about solving crimes and detective ethics; the first episode for the series was airing in the Fall of next year. She’d have to film throughout the end of Spring and going into the Summer, but it wasn’t as hectic and fast paced as a film production, thankfully.

Both Harry and Luci had decided to go back to New York just a tad bit earlier than when they’d usually leave for the holidays. Luci was excited to see her boyfriend again, and Harry? He couldn’t say the same.

Some random thought in his head told him to check his emails when he was waiting for his luggage at baggage claim. He mindlessly scrolled through the unopened emails that mostly included the subscriptions for his streaming services, his favorite clothing stores since he had a habit of shopping online way too much, and random stores that he never bought anything from but typed in his email anyways to get a free coupon for a percent off of something. But an email that caught his eye was from one he couldn’t recognize—most likely a pseudonym to reach him.

The email read: Might wanna check this out with a link that took him to a well-known media site, The Mass, that was known for twisting a celebrity’s word around. Not thinking of it too much, he read the headline that contained Luci’s name. He smiled a bit as this was the first article that was ever released of her. Just as he was about to send her the link, he kept scrolling, scanning over every word that was stated in the article. His smile had disappeared within every sentence that he read. His brows furrowed as he processed the words he was reading. And his heart sank throughout the entire article.

He put his phone away, grabbing his luggage that had circled around at least twice, and headed home. Harry tried to stay calm throughout the entire trip back home but his mind was swirling with unwanted thoughts, betrayal, and doubted love.

As he stood in front of his door, the door behind him had swung open, and before he got the chance to turn around, a pair of familiar arms were wrapped around his waist.

“Hi, my love. I missed you.” Luci’s hands rubbed up and down his chest, missing the feel of him. He hadn’t said anything, not one greeting. Instead, he turned around, making her grip on him loosen as he looked down at her. She was smiling, clearly clueless as to what he was feeling at the moment and oblivious about the article that was published about her.

Luci tiptoed to reach his lips before giving him a kiss. Just through that kiss itself, she knew something was wrong; he didn’t even kiss her back, which only pained both of them.

“Are you okay?” She asked. There was a bit of silence; the only thing that could be heard was Harry’s heartbeat that was pounding through his ears. “Hey, talk to me.”

Taking a deep breath, he started, “It took you thirty-six days for you to mess it all up again.”

Brows furrowed in confusion, Luci pulled back slightly. “What are you talking about?” She asked softly.

“Did Thea not tell you about the article that was published about you?” She shook her head, and Harry took a deep breath; he didn’t like that he was the one that had to inform her about it. “Someone sent me an article that was published on The Mass. It was an interview that took place after you filmed for Ocean’s Eight.”

Fuck.

A sudden realization hit her as she remembered the things she said in that interview—none of them were necessarily bad, but she did lie and say that she didn’t have a boyfriend when Harry was waiting for her at home.

The interview with Audrey had completely slipped her mind. She thought it would have been posted after the premiere, or even after filming was finished, but there was no story or article on her for months on end, so she’d forgotten about it and thought that it was completely dropped.

Her guess was that since her name was being put out there after filming for two big films, more people would want to read up on her. And she was glad now that people were more likely to search up her name on the search engine, but she really wished a section of that article didn’t exist.

“When did that interview happen?” He asked, breaking her out of her thoughts.

Luci took a deep breath. “In April.”

Harry closed his eyes for a moment, rubbing the skin between his eyebrows before he opened his eyes. “April. We were together in April. In fact, we never stopped being together. Why would you say you didn’t have a ‘lover’ or a boyfriend?”

“I…”

“Do you not want to be together? Is that what this is?” His tone was overbearing as it started to become more stern as he kept pressing.

“Of course, I want to be together-”

“Because it really seems like you don’t. Fuck, Ci. Do you even love me?”

“Yes! I love you!” She raised her voice, interrupting him as she wasn’t giving him a chance to speak. “How could you even question that?” Her eyes were filled with tears with how overwhelmed she was. “I love you so fucking much that it hurts. You’re everything to me, Harry. I want you all the time; I knew that from the moment I met you. So don’t doubt my love for you ever again.”

There was something attractive about declaring your love to someone so passionately in the middle of an argument that it almost made the other person want to rip their clothes off and fuck them in the hallway. That’s what Harry was thinking about right now, as inappropriate the timing was. Rage filled Luci as she proclaimed and spewed out her love; Harry, her love for Harry was her extreme joy.

“I don’t understand how you could say something like that, though.” He sighed, crossing his arms.

“I didn’t think this is what you wanted. You do realize that my name is spreading? And once they find out about you, all they’ll do is want pictures of you, even when I’m not with you! Is that what you want? Because I don’t. That’s a huge invasion of privacy that I’m not willing to share. No matter how much I love you, I don’t want to share you with the world.”

He nodded, understanding her words. But he felt a bit overwhelmed at the moment, and just needed time to breathe. “Okay. Just…just give me some time. I’m kinda overwhelmed with everything.”

Luci sighed sadly, but there was nothing she could do; she wasn’t going to deny him the space that he requested. “Alright.” She watched him open his door before entering, turning around to face her. “I love Harry. That’s going to change, I hope you know that.”

“I do.” He nodded. “Goodnight, Ci.”

Closing his door had, in a way, represented putting his guard up. He had been living freely with his guard down for a little more than a year, and this situation and the one prior had scared him a bit, so he needed to take some control in his feelings and his life; and if putting one guard up out of the four, then so be it.

Luci had spent the night alone, which was the exact opposite of her expectations when reuniting with Harry. She cried into her pillow, regretting every bad decision she made that had caused pain to him.

She then realized that he never said he loved her back, and he always said it back.

December 30, 2018

Luci didn’t have a clue as to how she survived the two weeks that Harry was mad at her because it seemed like the day and a half she was living through seemed much longer.

They hadn’t spoken since their reunion that turned into an argument, leading to Harry being disappointed in her…yet again.

Her anxiety was sky-rocketing; perhaps, that may be because she’d messed up twice already, so her thoughts had been on edge as they told her that this was the end—that he was done with her shit. She held so much love for him that she hoped that he didn’t see it as the end of the road—Luci didn’t know if she could handle that heartbreak, even though she was the one who caused him some pains and aches.

He doesn’t deserve that, he never did.

You don’t deserve him, her subconscious told her. Rolling her eyes to herself, she tried to push the negative thoughts out of her mind as they were driving like it was a race track, making her head hurt. The knock on her door had taken her out of her own head.

When she swung the door open, Harry was standing on the other side. He gave her a small smile—not the smile that he usually greeted her with, which she awfully missed very much, but it was a smile that was shown because he didn’t want to make it clear that he was disappointed.

“Hi, H.” Luci greeted softly.

“Hey, uh, are you busy?”

She shook her head. “No, I’ve got time for you.” Her words didn’t mean to come out in a flirty way, rather she meant them well and clearly.

“Okay. Do you wanna go to our spot?” He asked hesitantly. Harry had to encourage himself to even knock on her door, and he hated how tentative he was; that’s your girlfriend, for fuck sake, he had told himself.

“Yeah, of course. Let me just get my things.” Luci was always up for a trip to Coney Island; the spot that they made theirs. The spot that held so many memories and the most significant memory that beach held was the start of their love for one another.

Sure, it wasn’t the best idea to visit the beach during the wintertime, but neither of them cared enough to think about the temperature or if the soft grainy sand was covered in snow; they just needed to be in that specific place with one another.

The ride there was a quiet one—not so much peaceful as their minds were running haywire, but they’d managed to get to the cold beach without saying a word. They simply fell into an in sync step, walking side by side as their glove covered hands were stuffed inside of their own coat pockets for extra warmth when Luci would usually hold his hand inside of his pocket and cuddle up against each other as they walked through the cold.

Settling on the familiar spot on the snow covered sand, they stood a foot apart with their arms crossed as they watched the ocean crash onto the shore. Warmth radiated off their bodies due to the tension and nerves that coursed through their veins, which suddenly made the cold bearable as they stood next to each other. The only thing that was heard was the sound of nature, the sound of Mother Earth’s specialties that had surrounded them into a bubble of stillness. The silence was deafening.

Luci loathed the tension-filled silence; it definitely wasn’t her favorite thing when it came to her relationship with Harry. She had approximately three moments with him that included nerves filling her body; when she was in Singapore and told him that she didn’t feel like talking to him; the unfortunate event on her birthday that was entirely her fault; and the event that they’re going through now, yet again, her fault. She tried her very best to never get that certain feeling again, but she felt like a failure in doing so. And the only way they were going to fix it was by getting vulnerable, getting real; she’d felt like she did a very poor job with communicating on her end, and she was going to try to fix it.

“Someone had once told me that I was unlovable,” she started. “They said those words right to my face, and you could imagine how shocked I looked when they said them. They’d told me that the reason why I wasn’t in a real relationship all my life was because no one wanted me; they didn’t even look twice when I walked past them. No one was interested in me.”

She sighed, looking at Harry from her peripheral vision, and he still had his sight facing the water, but she knew that he was listening intently.

“And that’s hard coming from a family that was filled with so much love and respect for one another. It was a different reality than what I was used to. My parents make it seem so easy to love me, even though I’m a pain in their ass, but they never really complained about all my wants. When that person told me the harsh reality, I pushed people away. Whoever got close. Even when people had asked me out and seemed like they were interested in me throughout the years, I pushed them away and rejected them because I didn’t want to endure the pain that was inevitable.”

Turning her body towards him, she was shaking from the cold but also the ability to be vulnerable in front of her boyfriend for almost a year.

“Harry…” she called out softly. He looked at her, completely facing Luci. “I’m sorry for everything. I truly am. I’m sorry for pushing you away, and for not being here enough. I’m sorry for taking your kindness for granted and for making you doubt my love for you. You don’t deserve any heartache, and I promise, I’m still trying. I’m still new to this relationship stuff, so please be patient. I will spend forever trying and trying, trying to make you happy.”

Her words almost made a sob rip out of his mouth, but he contained his emotions well. Luci was cold, pouring out apologies and begging her for his forgiveness; she was new to vulnerability.

“I know I made a mistake—several of them—but I’m trying. If you…don’t want to be with me, then that’s understandable; I won’t blame you because, yeah, I haven’t been that great of a girlfriend to you and you deserve so, so much better; and I am sorry I couldn’t be that person to make you happy.” Her voice trailed off, cracking. Harry’s heart nearly broke at the sound of her voice as he tried to contain his emotions. “But miraculously, if you decide to forgive me, then we could work everything out. We’ll still grow and learn new things about each other, and it’ll be good from there, right?”

The sound of hope in her voice rang in his ears, and he couldn’t dare to listen to the heartbreak if he were to call it quits, which was a shock to hear her say that because she must’ve thought he was ending it for good; that thought made him sad. An abrupt flashback pounded in his brain as he remembered the happy memories they had with one another. A simpler time before the rain.

Just last year, they were in this exact same spot, watching the sun go down with one another in their arms. But as of now, they were standing a foot apart from each other, instead of sharing a kiss at how their relationship had made it through an entire year of ups and downs; they were unsure of their next move.

They had kept one another warm in the cold weather that breezed through them, but now, it seemed colder than usual. The air had wrapped its coldness around them, engulfing them into a hug.

Why didn’t the sun setting come with a warning sign to let them know what kind of storm was coming for them? It felt like their worlds had washed away into a whirlwind of displeasurable emotions; one they’d hoped they were strong enough to break through the storm.

Quite early in their relationship, they knew their relationship was going to be something special; they knew it was going to be one that was worth all the pain they’ve endured in the past; they knew it was the long haul that would last. The one obvious question that had run through their head like it was plastered on the big screen and written on the whiteboard was: how did everything go downhill so quickly?

He loved Luci with his entire heart. Sure, she’d made a few mistakes, but who hasn’t? They still had some issues to work out, such as communication and trust aspects of their relationship. But he wasn’t ready to let her go, and he really wasn’t planning on it. So, he said:

“We're gonna work this out.”

that’s the end of book one!

please come and talk to me about your favorite scenes and moments, and your thoughts and feelings! thank you so much for reading <3 book two will be posted soon!

#harry styles fanfiction #harry styles angst #harry styles smut #harry styles fluff #harry styles ff #harry styles fic #harry styles x oc #harry styles series #harry styles writing #harry styles au #boyfriend!harry #teacher!harry #actress!oc

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