#i think a lot of my feelings and frustrations with maarva come through in it

[andorerso]

i was wondering if you could talk a little bit about why you don’t like marva? (loved the new chapter of don’t say you love me)

Hoo boy, where do I begin? Put under a read more for spoilers, and for the anti-Maarva rant incoming.

First and probably biggest reason is the kidnapping. Drugging and taking a child from his community and his only remaining family, a child who's terrified, who's clearly never seen technology like theirs before, who doesn't even speak their language... She's quite literally the textbook example of the white savior trope, and most baffling of all, this is portrayed as a mostly positive thing. (Well, not even mostly. Other than Cassian still looking for his sister and their relationship being strained, I struggle to see where the show called out Maarva for her actions because well. It didn't.)

Then there's the way she treats Cassian after that. She's belittling, dismissive, borderline emotionally abusive, constantly puts him down and talks down on him, always criticizes him... She treats Bee kinda shitty too, mind you (for example snapping at him to shut up rather cruelly if you ask me.) Then she abandons Cassian when he needs her the most because now she suddenly cares about fighting the empire? And once again, it's portrayed as this selfless heroic act because I guess fighting the Empire is more important than anything. Fine, if that's what you wanna go for. Except that she doesn't fight them. She doesn't do anything, and this "noble" act of sacrifice is completely meaningless. It does nothing else but hurt Cassian. She took this child from his home, never took accountability for it, never treated him right as a mother, and now when he has no one else left and he's just begging her to go with him because despite everything, he does love her and he doesn't want to be alone and he doesn't want her to be in danger... she turns him away? And for what? So she can stay on Ferrix, sick and stubborn and refusing to take her medication and just being a nuisance to everyone? So she can die alone a month later without having any closure with her son? Okay. Makes sense. Oh wait, I forgot. She makes a speech. Groundbreaking.

What's especially annoying to me is that the narrative fully takes her side and never bothers to call her out on any of this. Yes, some people just don't have good mothers, and that'd be fine as a story, even though I'd still dislike her, but what makes me hate her even more is that the story doesn't seem to consider her a bad mother. The story wants me to like her. We're told she's a beloved part of the community, that she's a selfless mother, that she's an inspiring leader. Except that's not what they show us. Fiona Shaw herself talks about what a selfless hero she is for quote-on-quote rescuing Cassian, and it feels like I'm getting whiplash because did we watch the same show? Rescuing Cassian is not how I'd put it. She full on drugged and kidnapped a child, that's not a noble or heroic act of self-sacrifice.

Maarva never shows any warmth towards Cassian. Even in episode 7 when he goes back to her and episode 11 when he tries to call her, it feels like a boy desperately trying to please and live up to his mother's standards because she never made him feel like he was good enough. And that really is just the last straw. I wouldn't forgive her for kidnapping him, but I had hoped, initially, that there'd be consequences to this, that she'd show remorse at least. But I don't think Maarva ever really thought she did anything wrong because the story doesn't think she did anything wrong. And instead of trying to make it up to him like Clem seemed to have tried, she just gives him even more emotional damage.

I just can't tolerate her. Even her love for Cassian seems selfish at best, so there's nothing redeemable about her in my eyes.