#i think masato's so indignant because it's a matter of It's Too Good To Be True

[todayisafridaynight]

Daigo has so many genuine connections, all these people who would stand by him regardless of if Tojo still exists. It just sort of feels like it plays to the way Masato is just chronically blind to the love around him and the strength of Ichiban's whole thing and surrounds himself purely with transactional relationships. It's the way Mine viewed the world before he met Daigo, but Masato is purposefully cultivating this environment around himself. Masato HAD those bonds where Mine didn't, but Masato's "those who use and those who are used" still feels like a worse distillation of Mine's philosophy, or at least that the two rhyme even if they aren't the same. Daigo originally defying Mine's worldview led to a longing to understand it and be a part of it; Daigo defying Masato's would probably just lead to more seething lol. Tojo going away, not only is just 'oops daigo already planned on that' robbing Masato of the satisfaction, idk it just further highlights that without being wrapped up in the status of Chair that these people are still with Daigo. Aoki bought his connections through lies and money and destroyed the only ones he sincerely had by following "use or be use" to its end, but Daigo could just fuck off anywhere he wanted and still have not just friendship but as Masato might see it absolute loyalty (esp in a Mine lives scenario; Aoki's lil pet bastard Kume's devotion is absolutely a speck vs **Mine** ). Both Aoki and Daigo can lose their positions of power, but its only Masato who feels like he's lost everything. sdfklfsjld idk goodbye anyway the brainrot is strong please keep going I'm here for every second

OK BUT LIKE. ALL OF THIS. ABOVE MY FIREPLACE AND FRAMED

the note bout mine and masato's worldviews IS SUCH an interesting point too: in essence they both believed the same thing (genuine bonds are a myth and people only use each other), it was just that mine held onto the small hope that he'd be wrong one day. by the time daigo does prove him wrong, he's almost automatically willing to accept it. his problem is that he became so attached to daigo that when the possibility of him being taken away became real, he went off the deep end

in masato's case. Lord he's a field day to explore psychologically maybe in another post, but he did have those bonds mine wanted so earnestly for more than half his life, exactly. ever since arakawa saved him- hell, even after sawashiro realized the life he inflicted upon him, masato was showered with nothing but love from the arakawa family. it's a wonder that despite that fact, masato still insisted he was neglected and alone. settling for relationships he knew were fake and for the most part temporary, he wanted to protect himself- he didn't want to be attached and become hurt and vulnerable again

it really is a cruel twist for masato and daigo and how they end up: despite daigo actually having grown up alone, that didn't stop him from having a warm and inviting attitude towards people and giving him a sizable amount of people who'd follow him to the ends of the earth. inversely, masato had become greedy and wanted more adoration, even if it was superficial or surface level.

[schrijverr]

TRY NEW THINGS!

Summary:

Starish discovers a secret talent, but why did Syo hide it? What could have happend to let his passion go?

(warning: angst)

Natsuki x Syo

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Syo's month hadn't been that great. In fact it was pretty shitty. Shining had made something up again. For one month Starish would try something new every week, Twitter voted.

First they had failed at cooking, then they had tried their best at basketball (which, in Syo's defence, he would totally be good at if it wasn't for his height), then they had to jump out of a plane, which wasn't a great experience for Syo and now this. Ice-skating.

It wasn't that Syo was going to fail or be bad at it, it was quite the opposite, he was going to be good, because what Starish didn't know was that Syo had skated when he was younger. And he had been good, he even had competed on a high level. So with his luck the people at the rink knew him and he didn't think he was ready for those cringy video to be found by the internet. I mean he was comfortable with his body, but damn those suits were tight. 

So with a dry mouth he entered the rink with Starish trailing bhind him only to come face to face with: "M'dam?" The older women turned at the voice, "Syo is that you?" The cameras turned to them, crew feeling that this was a good moment to capture. 

"Yeah, long time no see." Syo answered, "How've you been?"

"I've been great, but what are you doing here. You went of to become famous with music, or something. Did you fail and come back to cry?" She smirked at the last part.

Syo made an indignant sound, "No I'm here with Starish, honestly didn't you at least try to see if I made it."

"Nope, if you made I would’ve found out someday." She sounded indifferent, but the humourous glint in her eyes was evident.

Before Syo could react to the jab that was made, Tokiya cut in: "I'm sorry to interrupt, but what the hell is going on?"

The two looked at them like they had forgotten that they were there. Then Syo bowed and made an arm gesture at the lady and said: "The great Yui-san, preferred to be called M'dam, everyone meet my former coach."

She just facedpalmed at the whole ordeal.

"Coach!" Starish basically yelled. 

"Why are you all so surprised?" M'dam said, "Didn't Syo ever tell you? He used to figure skate at high level." Syo turned red, as he went to deny everything, "It wasn't a big deal, please can we just get started."

"Ok.” M’dam arched her eyebrow at Syos denail, but went on anyway “Everyone 10 laps around the rink, warming up is important!" M'dam shouted and Starish set of. Syo and Otoya were the fastest, Natsuki not far behind.

"Ok, now we're going to stretch. Everyone on the floor! Touch the ground with your stomach!"

Starish dropped down and tried to do the exercise, but most barely reached their toes.

"Honestly do you even stretch at that fancy academy of yours, look at Syo he's basically relaxing. At least he didn't forget my training." It echoed through the rink.

The rest of Starish turned to Syo who was indeed touching the ground with his stomach. He looked peaseful and calm as he lay there. 

"What, how are you doing that?" Otoya asked, "You never do that at school."

From his position Syo shrugged and said: "I thought it would be rude to do the exercise so easily, so I just did it normally. Besides it too much work to do it when it isn't necessary."

That last comment got him a kick in the side from M'dam. "We'll see if you talk like that on the ice, it has been a while since you've been on it." She said, trying to make him nervous.

And Syo was nervous to get back on ice, but that changed the moment he stepped on the ice itself. It felt like coming home, skates on, feet on the ice, surrounded with cold air. It just felt right.

He skated around the rink, closing his eyes and enjoying the sensation. The rest, a bit shakier on the ice skating, followed him wobbly.

M'dam had put on skates as well and she gestured everyone to come to her. After they had gathered around she told them what they were going to do, a simple jump. That wasn’t all to hard, but most of the starish members landed flat on their butt. Gawking at Syo who effortlessly jumped on the ice landing perfectly. This was certainly not something they’d expected, especially from their youngest, not always the most coordinated, member.

Behind them M’dam shook her head and smiled. “Still the same as always” she said, effectively scaring starish.

“How come?” asked Masato.

“He really never told you.” she said and muttered something to herself. “He tries to deny it now, but he was very good. It is no luck that he has trophies on his wall. The guy worked hard for it. The ice was his home and it is nice to see that after a two years it still is.”

She smiled fondly at his peaceful expression and then turned to starish again, fondness melting of her face. “Well, don’t just sit there, come on people. Hurry. No laziness allowed.”

Her yelling had startled Syo who was now laughing at them. He skated towards them and skidded to a hald before them. “Rule number one: no laziness. Heard it too many times. She can be very strict.” he smiled at them and helped Natsuki up. The rest he left to their own devices.

He started to teach Natsuki the basics and after a few minutes he actually got it one time. A bit shaky, sure. But that didn’t matter as he and Syo were laughing every time he tried. He attempted again and, of course, fell over pulling Syo with him. He landed on top of him and for a second they just stared at each other, Syo laying on Natsukis chest. Then they burst out laughing. It was a very intimate moment. A moment of joy where they forgot the world around them.

M’dam leaned in by Ren and whispered: “Are they a couple?” To which Ren had to shake his head, he answered: “No, tho we expect them to at least have a crush on one another, but both are too stubborn or shy to admit it.”

“Mmmhhh,” M’dam cleared her throat and yelled: “You guys are shit at this lets try something else obviously you guys aren’t made for jumping.”

This broke Syo and Natsuki apart who suddenly realized how close they were. Quickly breaking away, they flushed a bright shade of scarlet. M’dam decided not to tease Syo moved on: ”Maybe in stead of jumping you can try spinning. Syo?”

Syo skated forward and let her take one leg in her hand while he moved his body in a horizontal position. M’dam explained the basics and showed it by spinning Syo and letting go after a while, letting him continue to twirl.

At this point Masato and Tokiya noped the F out and left the rink saying that they wanted to keep their ability to move properly and that that was not the way to achieve that goal. The rest of starish tried, keyword tried. It was kinda sad and Syo saw that M’dam was reaching the end of her patience, so he said: ”Maybe we should call it a day. Two members stopped and this disaster that is you guys will only end in injury which isn’t something we can afford.” M’dam was eager to agree, but had to make Syos month shittier by saying: “Syo maybe you could do one of your old routines? You don’t seem rusty to me and it will be a great note to end on.”

He’d tried to get out of it, but still here he was on ice about to skate is youth Olympian debut routine. It was one that he held near and dear to his heart which made it a bit better. He had made the music itself. He’d become first that day and made an epic entry in the world skating community. It was sad that he had to part from that so soon. Luckily he didn’t have time to overthink it when the music started.

He skated it. Muscle memory kicking in and providing him with the choreography. It was as if he’d never left the ice. A wobbly land here and there, sure, but still as breathtaking as it had been the first time. When he was done starish loud applause got Syo out of the headspace back into reality. He skated to the exit and looked at them. He saw their faces of awe, but most importantly Natsukis face. He looked as of he saw a miracle take place, eyes wide with wonder. Then the cursed word came out of his mouth: “Why did you ever stop?”

And that was the breaking point. Syo broke down. Literally, he crumpled down to the floor and started crying uncontrollably. Sobs raked through his body as he shook with sadness. The rest had no clue what to do with this Syo, they had never seen him like this, he had always been strong. In the end Natsuki dropped down and hugged him. He whispered sweet nothings in his ear, saying that it was alright.

Then in a raspy voice from crying Syo said: “No, it’s not ok. I had to throw all my hard work away. Skating was my everything, music was second in life. And suddenly all of it came crumbling down before my eyes.” He continued sobbing leaving them all speechless.

“So when you said you loved music more you lied?” M’dam almost didn’t dare to ask it, but she did. Syo looked up. He was a mess, tear streaks on his cheeks and hair ruffled from burying his face in Natsukis side. He nodded his head and spoke again: “Yes, I lied. It had been a normal doctor check up and he told me if I continued jumping like that for two to four more years I could lose the ability to walk completely. My knees just weren’t build for it. So I sucked it up and decided to retire. Do one last show, win gold and go out with a bang. It broke me that I’d never got to the normal Olympics. So when I retired I poured myslef into music. Practicing every day. I swore to myslef that I wouldn’t go back to the ice ever again. I applied to Shining Academy and got in. After I got in I decided to celebrate with breaking my oath, I went back to the ice and just did it for fun. It still is my happy place.”

Starish and M’dam were sad for Syo. It was painful that he had to give something he loved doing up for the sake of his health, but they were glad that he made the decision to not harm his body.

“You did succeed in going out with a bang.” M’dam broke the silence, “I mean gold and a world record isn’t nothing.” He smiled and nodded a fond look in his eyes (the kind he only had when he looked at Natsuki) “Yeah”, he whispered, that was epic. Everyone was so sad to see me go. I got so may messages and shit. Ouch!” He rubbed his head.

M’dam had hit him and scolded him: “Of course dumbass, what did you expect going out there on stage getting your medal and suddenly announcing that this was your last time and walking of like that! If I didn’t know from the beginning I would have beaten your ass up. You also ignored all the journalist and if I remember correctly your only quote in the matter was: “I might be done here, but don’t think you’ve seen the last of the bi ass.” effectively coming out at the same time.”

Syo turned scarlet and didn’t dare to look at starish. M’dam eyerolled and sighed an exasperated sigh and said: “Guess you did not tell them that either.” Which caused an outburst from Syo: “Well what did expect, for me to give them the exact information to hate me and kick me out?”

This shocked starish. Ren said: “Why would you ever think we wanted to kick you out?” To their horror Syo made a confused face as if he thought that it was obvious that they didn’t want him there. Natsuki came to the rescue: “Of course we don’t want you to go. We love you! I mean sexuality isn’t a good enough reason. If that were the case I would be out to. Since I’m pan, but you want me out, do you?” Syo shook his head, he didn’t want that. “See, I’m sure we all have something like that. Right guys.” He turned to the rest for backup.

“I’m gay.” that was Masato.

“I’m demi ace.” said Tokiya.

“I would be you bi partner in crime.” of course Otoya would frase it like that.

“Yeah, same.” was Rens lazy answer.

Syos eyes grew wide. “You don’t hate me?” he said.

“We could never.” answered Natsuki and hugged him again in the process giving him a peck on his temple.

Starish groaned. “Get a room” yelled Otoya and Ren at the same time. This made them redder then a tomato. Then Syo decided he was brave and asked: “I will,” then turned to Natsuki, “If you’ll have me.”

“Sure pick you up at eight tomorrow?”

Maybe this month wasn’t so shitty after all, Syo thought.

Which was ruined when they got back and looked up his old skating vidoes. God Ren really didn’t need to remind him how tight and revealing his outfits had been.