#i was gonna watch beauty and the beast (the czech one) but this sounds more fun tbh

[cinephobia]

About to have myself a mini Żuławski marathon lets gooooooooooo

[opacarophile]

1st semi final in a nutshell

Azerbaijan: So they send the real-life Moana to the stage escept she was wearing a white dress

Iceland: Iceland sends some weird version of Justin Bieber who has a cute smile, but kiddo, this ain’t enough to make up for this extremely boring song

Albania: *sings in its language* I DON’T UNDERSTAND A SINGLE WORD BUT DAMN THIS VOCAL RANGE WTF? 

Belgium: *can’t decide if she’s gonna wear a dress or pants so they use both* *hairstylists were drunk* so to sum up: good song, bad staging

Czech Republic: *mikolas stops by to perform before school* okay so Mikolas is a peace of candy and i would totally smack him. plus he had a back injury and still danced which was impressive. BUT!!!!!!!!!! why were they recreating the music video? Plus...catchy song but not impressive. seems like sax guy returned to eurovision to slay one more time. except he didn’t. 

Lithuania: OKAY SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN HOW THIS SONG GOT TO THE FINAL PLEASE! also congrats for the WILD choreography *applause* 

Israel: This year China is taking part in Eurovision which is great. Except it’s not and Israel is mixing so many cultures in its performance that i got a cultural shock just from watching lol. chinese lucky cats? netta dressed as a geisha? also turns out she is really bad live...anyways...catchy song BUT IF THIS THING WINS I AM GONNA BE SO MAD I SWEAR. 

Belarus: Seems like Alekseev has stolen the rose from The Beauty and The Beast just for this performance. I really like him as a singer but he sings this song so bad live that it makes me sad. Also this rose was such a cringe...like what’s the story there, fella? You have some flower fettish or what? Also side note, i really like the fast version of this song, which is like SO dramatic!

Estonia: *no windows we hurt during this performance* So apparently Elsa decided to retire as a queen and start a music career........JOKE ASIDE: Estonia’s song is so beautiful and Elina has such an amazing voice that i’m gonna cry. 

Bulgaria: NOW LET’S TALK ABOUT THIS SCI-FI GORGEOUSNESS THAT HAPPENED ON STAGE LAST NIGHT *this is gonna be long so PREPARE*

Okay so what Equinox did last night was more than amazing. I was so excited to see their performance and I barely made it to the end alive! That harmony and the fact that they took the maximum of this stage and made it look so amazing and beautiful...I CAN”T! 

Also side note but i was going to have aa heart attack because i thought they were not gonna make it to the final.

F.Y.R. Macedonia: so....seems like she didn’t know how to wear a blazer and put it on the wrong way huh? then she took it off to make it look better and GUESS WHAT..it did not go out as planned *lol*

Croatia: let’s take a second and appreciate how gorgeous Frankia is. Okay? Okay. This song is so cool and it actually sounds like it’s a part from a Fifty Shades of Grey movie *lol* 

Austria: I could listen to his voice forever. The song is not that impressive and......he was dressed as the Tin Man from Wizard of Oz, but a really, really poor version of it.

Greece: I AM SO MAD OMG SOMEONE PLEASE SERVE JUSTICE FOR YIANNA TERZI!!!!!!!!!!!! Why didn’t they qualify??? I know that the staging was kinda boring BUT THIS SONG IS EVERYTHING....SO HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? SUCH A GREAT VOICE...SUCH A BEAUTIFUL SONG...

Greece, you will be revenged! 

Finland: I am so disappointed that the magician who was supposed to do the magic trick and throw knives did not show up to the stage! anyways...what was with this spinning wheel, Findalnd? she sings she’s not scared...and you do this?? this is not extreme enough....push her off a plane...make her jump from a bridge...

Armenia:  wasn’t Joci Papai representin Hungary last year?? IS THIS ALLOWED? also...this was a good song

Switzerland: I feel so sad that this song did not make it to the final...Such a great performance....and this badass energy, this swiss rock and this blond hair and cool look...

Cyprus: Eleni is QUEEN! She actually reminds me of a Cypriot version of Beyonce. Excpet I don’t like Beyonce and Eleni is MUCH GREATER. Like such moves...such energy...such confidence. Eleni came and slayed Eurovision. 

Also it’s so funny how international this whole perforamce is: eleni is Albanian, representing Cyprus, but she lived her whole life in Greece and sang an English song with a Spanish title lol