#i would say that i was the 'classic case' of transsexualism in that i always intuitively knew from an early age...

[uncanny-tranny]

So, I put this observation under the tags to a funny post, but it had me really reflecting on my childhood, and it's a topic I always keep in my mind.

I remember growing up with queerness as this taboo - something which was a he-who-must-not-be-named basis. I remember listening to the adults in my life talking scandelously about anything remotely queer. I think a lot of people are under the impression that children are simply dumb as rocks and can't understand anything, and while I didn't understand queerness, I understood that that was what I was.

I remember exploring my gender in the confines of cisheterosexual normativity. I saw myself in all of the male princes, the heroes, the idea that I could emulate the qualities of a Good Man when I was older, and it was weird. I knew that much about me, but I also knew that these ideas were never made with me in mind. I think that's a big part of what held me back from actively combating the life that felt forced onto me.

Part of me wishes to go back to the time I reveled in imagining myself as Prince Charming just to say that... you're right, you were Prince Charming. You saw the world that turned its cheek to you, and you retreated inward. Your heart was always on your sleeve, but you can make it. You will, you must.

[transmascjfk]

i'm,, trans and hc chihiro to be a male..

i'm sorry, but i don't quite understand how that's transphobic. could you please explain how chihiro is transmisogynistic? (sorry if i come off as rude - that's not my intention and i genuinely just don't understand, though i would like to!!)

What is transmisoginy?

"Transmisogyny is a distinct category of transphobia in that transmisogyny mainly focuses on trans women and other transgender individuals who demonstrate femininity, whereas transphobia is a more general term, covering a broader spectrum of prejudice and discrimination towards transsexual and transgender individuals. Julia Serano states in Whipping Girl that "when the majority of jokes made at the expense of trans people center on 'men wearing dresses' or 'men who want their penises cut off' that is not transphobia – it is transmisogyny. When the majority of violence and sexual assaults committed against trans people is directed at trans women, that is not transphobia – it is transmisogyny." "

Chihiro is written to mock trans women, to say that in reality trans women are secretly men, she is a man who is weak and uses being trans as a way to escape her problems, this is a thing that is also said to trans men a lot, that theyre just trying to avoid the hard parts of being a woman by becoming a man. Even if the writters intended it to be like that or not (which they probably did because transphobia is a big thing that happens a lot, obviously) it's still transmisogynistic. Thats that on that

This is a pretty common transphobic trope actually, the "Turns out this one character was actually from the opposite sex??!!", theres more examples of this in other games outside Danganronpa.

But also her experience is pretty different from other examples, her experiences are way too similar with trans womens experiences.

This is mostly for the cis people who call her a crossdresser and refuse to change their mind, on it, sit down.

Written by a trans man.

Don't tell me whats transphobic and what it's not transphobic if you're cis. Just sit down and read.

Tw: transphobia, transmisoginy, death mentions and blood in the pictures.

The game implies a lot of stuff with her dialogue, it doesn't straight up says "I don't want to be a woman anymore, I'm a man" like everyone claims it does.

[ Alt text 1:

Chihiro Fujisaki: I'm going to get stronger...and accept who I am... ]

[ Alt text 2:

Chihiro Fujisaki: Strong enough so that when someone says "even thought you're a boy" I'll be okay. I'll get better! ]

[ Alt text 3:

Chihiro Fujisaki: I wrapped myself in lies. I'm weak. I want to destroy that version of me forever! ]

[ Alt text 4:

Chihiro Fujisaki: ... I want to change. ]

[ Alt text 5:

Chihiro Fujisaki: I have to change. I don't want to be weak anymore ]

She goes to Mondo not because hes masculine, but because she admires him and his strength. She never once says it's because shes a man or because Mondo is a man.

[ Alt text 1:

Chihiro Fujisaki: Maybe talking to Mondo about it will help give me some courage... ]

[ Alt text 2:

Chihiro Fujisaki: I admire... your strength... ]

These dialogues can be read in two ways, the first one being the one the game tries the hardest to put in your head thats shes a man, all of this guessed by other people btw not what she herself says. Which is really transphobic, because she was written as a trans woman and then theyre like "uh no actually hes a man, because he was born as one but hes a coward so he started to dress as a woman to hide from his problems. Because thats what people do right? People who dress as their oppossite gender are so pathetic, specially men amiright? Ahaha"

Reading it in this way really weird, you're doing a lot of mental gymnastics because you would literally call her a trans woman with all of this if the rest of the trial, that consists of cis people assuming shes a man, didn't happen. And sadly you're following transphobic ideas by this. Because the canon is transphobic and transmysoginistic.

And the other way is just read what she says, that she just wants to be stronger and stop lying to everyone, basically about being cis, because shes not, shes amab (assigned male at birth) and thats probably what she said to Mondo, but most people when a trans person who already passes or is in their transition comes out many people tend to think "oh so youre your gender assigned at birth and not the one you claim to be?", because they don't get what being trans is and they think only "biological gender" is a thing. Basically, misgendering and invalidating the trans person.

I can guess all of this just because of how vague they decided to make her dialogue, not even showing how she tells Mondo about being amab.

What did she said to Mondo? "I'm trans"? "I'm a man"? "I was born a man"? We dont know, because they didn't show it and she died right afterwards and then everyone was like "Chihiro was secretly a man" to solve the case and thats it. A lot of people in the discourse get their information from Monokuma who isn't either Chihiro or even Mondo. Monokuma knows many things but he can't read minds to know if she was really trans or not, only she could say it but she died so she couldn't explain if shes trans or not.

[ Alt text:

A youtube comment by Gail Frisbee, posted 4 days ago, this comment was edited by the autor. The comment says:

"It's honestly increible to me when people try to argue that a scene in which a female-presenting character gets their genitals groped and then is posthumously referred to as a male from that point on can't be transphobic just because that character calls themselves a boy in some other side content later. It's on about the same level of intellectual honesty as claiming that Quiet from MGS5 isn't really fanservice because she totally breaths throught her skin you guys.

As it turns out, if you really dig down deep into the lore, Chihiro is a fictional character and the same people who wrote the genital investigation scene also wrote the lines that character says in the game as well. It's a shocking twist, I know." ]

Her fears of being outed and people founding out her secret (being trans) or being transphobic is used as a gross big twist. A trans woman being used as a mockery of trans people? Great totally normal (/sarcasm)

Read this post made by a trans woman. I'll be using this only part but it's still a great read.

[ Alt text:

So. There is a lot to unpack here, but I want to start with something that specifically hurts me as a trans woman, and that's how the game flippantly uses real world horrors trans people face as shocking reveals and twists. You can go down the list for "worst nightmares" of trans people incluiding:

Threatening to be outed against your wishes

Outing yourself to a trusted friend and being met with rejection, or worse, violence

Having your body and privacy examined and invaded

Having your deadname used and being misgendered after death, when you can't correct them ]

Now, let's go to her backstory for a bit. I will be using the wiki for this. (Which sadly uses he/him for her 💔)

" When Chihiro was a child, he became the subject of harassment and bullying. He was always told to "be a man" and that he was "so weak despite being a boy", and because of that, Chihiro slowly but surely began to develop a "weakness complex". In order to escape the bullying, Chihiro began to dress as a girl so that people wouldn't bully him as a weak boy. "

This doesn't sound like a normal crossdresser, this sounds like a trans woman who was bullied for being different when she was younger, like many trans people, and then she decided to transition because she's a woman, she wanted to be more feminine and stop being seen as a person shes not. Specially after so many people tell her to basically man up when she doesn't want that, because shes not a man.

Have you ever heard of the classic stories of "since I was little i knew i was different, i was a boy who liked playing with dolls and was more feminine than the rest" or "i used to be a tomboy when i was little, i had mostly male friends, i liked playing with car toys and was more masculine than other kids" coming from trans people? This just sounds as these types of stories to me.

People also like to say that alter ego uses he/him pronouns and says shes a boy. Many trans people can misgender themselves for personal reasons too guys, she could've been trying to misgender herself because she didn't felt like she wasn't enough to be a real woman, this happens a lot to trans people. If people constantly tell you that you're not actually transgender or you just feel like you're faking it then you might actually believe it, thats were most "detransitioners" come from. And thats basically what they made her, a detransitioner.

Some of you might also don't get how shes trans because you think she doesn't perfect or exact trans stereotypes. Trans experiences can be similar on the feeling of not fitting in, dysphoria, etc. But trans experiences, stories, transitions and complete lifes can be very different, because we all (including cis people) live different lifes, experience, process and cope with things differently. So i can understand why you might not get her being trans coded at first, don't worry. But try instead of just not caring because you don't get it at the first try, to see what trans people say.

This whole discourse its mostly cis people talking over trans people about their own experiences (incluiding the dead trans coded characters experience) saying if theyre valid or not and denying stuff not wanting to learn anything, completely refusing to it because "In canon hes a boy" ok then in canon shes written in a transphobic way too but most of you don't care about that. You would rather call her a crossdresser than try to acknowledge how obviously trans coded she is and how thats used as transphobia.

The way most cis people act in this discourse is very transphobic to me to be honest, if you think you're a good ally but act like this then you should get more educated on the topic as a whole and about trans people too.

-the trans Chihiro flag to finish this up, she has a bit boobie! good for her! good for her.

[dwestfieldblog]

THERE IS NO SAFE WORD

ATEH MALKUTH, VE-GEBURAH, VE-GEDULLAH, LE-OLAHM...

Anybody who understands my music will never be unhappy again. Beethoven. That sounds like a cue for a song...and here it is...

Well, now we know the actual defined amount of stubborn dumb stupidity for sure in America. Over 70 million morons. Loved seeing Trump jr call on his dad to wage ‘Total war’ (A phrase Goebbels used in Berlin 1943 when the allies were approaching... and we know how that ended, go on Big Don, do the honourable thing for the first time in your foul life.) Junior also said ‘It’s time to clean up this mess and stop looking like a banana republic’. Why yes son, it is, so off you all pop. Daddy is busy implanting his loyalists in the Pentagon and already thinking of running in 2024 but by then he should either be in prison or in exile on a tiny freezing Scottish island with a one hole golf course where he can still cheat. Seems likely he, family and their backers are planning to make good use of their through the looking glass rabies crazed sheep and continue to destabilize America for the Kremlin. Loved that the orange psychopath tweeted early ‘I WON THIS ELECTION, BY A LOT!’ and watched as he demanded all votes be counted...and the more they were, the more he lost by. HILARIOUS.

And his call to arms to ‘Stand back and stand by’ to The Proud Boys, who are not far right Nazi thugs at all no sir. To misuse Hunter S Thompson’s genius for the hundredth time, I hope that this is where the wave (of populist filth Trump has been riding) finally breaks and rolls back. But over 70 million morons say different. The 80 million who voted for the other guy must be happy there are so many who can clean the streets and fill the shelves at food shops. Education needs to be improved in America and Britain next year, a ‘LOT’.

January 20th 2021...Celebrate with joy the end of a despotic douche bag...allow the world to feel lighter. Republicans, you should feel ashamed. America, this bastard has been undoing your Constitution like a prom queen’s girdle for a button mushroom quickie rape for four years and couldn’t have cared less about Covid and how many of you died...as he said ‘It is what it is’. So SAD!!!! Arf. Donald, you are and were nothing more than a spoiled five year old brat with as much empathy for humanity as a lizard. A banishing ritual will need to be performed in around the White House...call up the Native Indians, the witches and South Park and cleanse the area of astral poison. The swamp will be drained when the deranged incubus’s entire family of scheming wannabe aristocrats vacates for good.And don’t let him sit at a little table to pardon them and himself.Lowlifes...speaking of whom...

It has taken a lot to make me smile this year (what, you too huh?) but seeing Rudy Giuliani giving a press conference between a porn book store and a funeral parlour in a parking lot did it. The T family, Jared, Rudy, Pompeo, Paula White (the Unchristian millionaire), the slurring ‘star witness’ Melissa Carone, spokeswoman Kayleigh with her cute little cross and all the rest of those despicable liars must all be flushed down the drains, no second chances, repentance or absolution.And as for Dr Scott Atlas telling the American public to ‘rise up’ against the safety measures called for by the state against Covid...A doctor telling you to ignore the rule against large indoor gatherings etc. A doctor.RISE UP? 12 million cases in the US as of mid November...254 thousand dead. That number is rising fast. Good luck from keeping the world falling on you Atlas, Wonder what the orange one offered him to blab such stinking dung. Another doctor with a hypocritical oath.

The smug toad Steve Bannon on yet another shitestirring podcast,spoke about beheading virologist Dr Fauci and the Director of the FBI Christopher Wray...‘I’d put the heads on pikes, right. I’d put them at the two corners of the White House as a warning to federal bureaucrats, you either get with the programme or you are gone.’Twitter banned him outright (and how long did that take?) but the ever wonderful facebook didn’t think that advocating murder online like any other good fundamentalist was reason enough. They believe in the first amendment, hurrah for the robot Zuckerberg.Like? Dislike? Delete, good luck.

And meanwhile the EU budget, involving 673 billion pounds for Covid connected concerns has been blocked by the continuing charming behaviour of Hungary and Poland. And why would they do that at this time of dire need? Why, because the release of the funds is dependent upon the rule of actual law in each of the countries to which the money is allocated. They have some very naughty politicians there who are upset about this and the darlings have taken it personally. These men could well be directly responsible for hundreds of unnecessary deaths. Hungary’s PM Orban said the clause would ‘jeopardise trust’ between member states. Well pal, they already don’t trust you due to your actions in the last ten years over freedom of speech, assembly, judges etc etc.

The Polish ‘Justice’ minister said the clause was ‘...really an institutional political enslavement, a radical limitation of sovereignty’. Sounds like Nigel Farage.(btw, Love that he lost 10 thousand pounds betting on his golden mate to win the US Presidential election. Oh well, you can pick that up fast enough from taking the Euros you rail against eh? Got to relish the classic two faced double English standards he stoops so low to wave so high) Anyway, I digress, if it seems unfair to Poland and Hungary that they act more like actual democracies rather than extremist populist swine, perhaps they should also leave the EU and team up with Mother Russia and Uncle China.Again, Vladimir must be well pleased with how Europe and America are collapsing.

Belarus...the ‘police’ are beating up women, using stun grenades on unarmed pensioners and teens. These are not police and have nothing to do with any law other than that of the jungle. Lukashenko is their Trump, a man who always swore his country would be independent of Russia and then accepts 1.5 billion dollars in loans. Good luck with paying back the interest with your soul Alex, needs must when the Devil drives eh? Loved how those loyal to the dictator described the protestors as truants and transsexuals’. 150,000 of them? Seems a lot. But never mind, hired thugs and sadists are always easy to come by, whatever the country and whatever the year. Easy work and fun if you enjoy it, conscience free. Sure they are just trying to feed their families.

China wants a global QR Covid code, making tracking humans even easier via their brilliant technology. Let’s see who falls for that one, would you want yet more personal data known by those who created the virus and shot their own children? (For the record, I do not think Covid was taken over there and released by enemy agents and I certainly don’t think it was created by accident any more than the updated version will be.) Making a fortune out of others’ misfortune seems quite like disaster capitalism for communists.  Drug companies will be hoping the 19 virus will ‘mutate’ to 21 and 22 in order that we will all need annual vaccines.

Prague, on the anniversary of the Czechoslovakian Velvet Revolution on November 17th, 250,000 march against their PM, (an ex informer to the communists) who has been Premier for too many years...another rich businessman deep in corruption scandals, I loved his comment after witnessing the thousands that he didn’t ‘understand’ why they were doing it. That said, there were many protesting against the use of...face masks. Ok, by all means choose not to wear them. Then stay the hell away from everyone else until you are vaccinated and don’t you dare go to hospital when you fall ill. Deal?

Englerland...The manic baldhead liar Cummings has at last been kicked out of Downing Street and a fine and noble advisor he was to the PM eh? Herd immunity my arse. Seems possible he might work for Farrage and continue destroying the system from within. Fnord. God help us all, the ‘UK’ is hosting the United Nations Climate Change conference in November 2021 and taking the presidency of the G7 in January...with Boris at the helm? Nobody takes this blustering useless lying cretin seriously unless their jobs depend on him. Tory supporters, what does it take for you to see reason, how much evidence of unending failure? At very least replace the Chumocracy rampant in the government or Doom, damnation, despair, death and more doom will repeat.Nice to see we get the vaccine tested on us first...guinea pigs are safer for the rest of the world on an island...

Fascinated to see that 20m pounds were not available for poor children’s free school meals but 21 million in taxpayers’ money for a go between businessman to get PPE (piss poor excuse/personal protection equipment) for NHS staff, was. How much did the go between pocket? 55 thousand dead in UK, fifth in the world,so proud of the levels of national intelligence and Govermental planning. Brexit and Covid in a double whammy with the most incompetent and corrupt government in my lifetime. As John Lydon used to rant on a perfect loop;’ This is what you want, this is what you get’. Possibly I am abusing his actual meaning, sorry Johnny. No future for the UK...None for me anyway...

Was the UK and America’s snowflake nonsense, seeded with the birth of instagram, tik tok et al/ forums with young folk seeking approval from their peers and feeling important when they were ‘Liked’? A few years later in the (ha ha) real world, they are easily insulted by others who do not find them having much depth or value. Kids’, being ‘liked’ is not the same as being respected, or loved. Pretend alpha males, being feared is not respect either.

‘Since words contain both denotations (referents in the sensory-existential world) and connotations (emotional tones or rhetorical hooks) humans can be moved to action, even by words which have no real meaning or reference in actuality. This is the mechanism of demagoguery, advertising and much of organised religion’ RAW. It also explains why, in tandem with tones, symbols and an altered brain speed,directed Will can cause change in ‘realities’. The litany of ritual, the mantras of magick and images focused to fire with the Tantric arrow. Oops, missed again. Anyway...back to the negativity☺‘

...as population increases, wages fall but later prices increase....and the relation between them –is to be considered the index of revolutionary potential...and can be predicted as precisely as eclipses in astronomy’. Robert Anton Wilson, The Widow’s Son (Hilaritas Press) 1985.

Thanks to Covid, hundreds of thousands of businesses have collapsed; the jobless or part timers are unable to pay rent or feed their families...and receive little or no support from governments who have either pocketed their taxes or just given rewards and contracts to their friends. The overload stress levels and knock on effect on those who had the virus and still suffer -or those who could not get into hospital for treatment will be massive. Every populist knows there has never been a better time to manipulate the fear and anger of the masses. Demonstrations, riots and harsher laws will spread each creating their own chain reaction.Watch out for Nationalists pointing fingers, don’t buy their snake oil. Avoid giving groups like QAnon any of your energy, paranoia is a creepy way to live and a sleazy way to die.

Ten months of reading emails which come across like distress signals or suicide notes from friends or that scene in Interstellar when the son knows his father could be dead by the time the message gets through. BUT...‘Help may arrive invisibly and unexpectedly from unknown sources’. Be open to this. Be sensitive and attuned to quantum parallels, there is a reaction going on to all the uff and crud, sidestep, step to the side... Allwhere and all now. You don’t need to ‘believe’ this, just be aware, sense it.

TANA, ORPHEUS, ARADIA, LUCIFER (or Robin, Marian, Orfee, Bride, all ye gentry come from Side)...Protection and guides, projected archetypes created by our minds and evolved by themselves...

We, as a species, exist in a world in which exists a myriad of data points. Upon these matrices of points we superimpose a structure and the world makes sense to us. The pattern of the structure originates within our biological and sociological properties.Persinge and Lafreniere.1977.

The intelligence should direct the will. Aquinas. The light of the body is the eye; if therefore thine eye be single, thy whole body will be full of light. Matt6:22.

Have tied the last five years together and I have a feeling my time in this country is coming to an end, give it seven months perhaps. Thank you for reading, hope some was entertaining...Withe much Love from Donkey Oti, and Onan the Barbarian, stay healthy, wishing you the best Christmas and 2021 possible, Ba-ra-ka, Et in Arcadia Ego . Love, always.                                

[gaudeixcc]

Peloton News – G17 tour – Halfway between the Sun and the Moon.

At least once a year for the last 6 years, we have been away on a cycling tour.

It all started with JT and I and a trip to Majorca.

Here’s a fact for you, long brushed under the carpet of time. I actually arranged most of the riding and routes on the first trip. Yep.. I did.

I Google-Earthed each route to make sure it was an actual road and not some farmer’s track. I mapped them, Garmin’d them and then sent them to JT.

All was well.

Some of the iconic long-time favourites were first born here. Col De Sa Batalla, the decent into Soller.

There were also a couple of howlers in there too. The strip in Magaluf… not my finest cartographical moment. JT trying his best to hide his ‘WTF-face’ as we glided down the main strip on a casual Saturday afternoon. Since this point, his patience his shortened considerably and his control-freakery at all things planning has well and truly taken a Japanese knott-weed grip on the roster.

I didn’t mind handing the planning gauntlet back in all honesty. It’s easy enough to do, but the absolute merciless hammering you get from the baying Peloton should you as much as put a wheel wrong takes what little shine there is off the whole process. That and the constant squeaky-wheel that is our diminutive friend, always asking for a progress update. He would see it as delegation…. But that would assume that some level of responsibility had passed to allow minor decision making…

‘Big assumption’ the little man would no doubt counter.

At times I’ve felt very much the beaten-wife…” I just do it to keep him happy… you know… for a quiet life and all that”

I say all that though… but I know that deep down… every member of the Peleton loves his ruthless efficiency at planning and organising. For most of the team, all that is required of you is to follow a list of instruction on what to pack (I mean, it’s like a professionally guided tour, it really is) and then turn up at an airport on the time written in the e-mail (plus numerous reminders).

Turn up, go where told, cycle, arrive home. Bosh. That’s it But, as long as Gaudeix are going on tour, JT will plan it and sanction the decisions, I’ll sort the caps and the shirts (for the Grande Tours) and then completely exaggerate everything via the printed word and everyone else will turn up and contribute to making these trips what they are… a great experience. Each and every one.

This edition of Peloton news will take a slight departure from the usual recounting of tour heroics.

Yes, I will be covering some of the big moments as we work through the following process…. however I feel a slight shift in format is required to keep things a little fresh.

‘Feedback… it’s the breakfast of champions’…well, so sayeth an old Peloton laggard…. a man who hasn’t edged his cycling beak out of the comfort of his nest (meringue?) for some time.

I couldn’t agree more.

In my stationary cupboard team (I’m proud of each and every one of them), we have deep and intensive feedback sessions…. Not so much your classical 360 degree feedback (i.e. the ‘to me, to you’ type session so favoured by many a progression management guru). No, I like to call mine the 180 sessions… I tell ‘em what I think… if they know what’s good for ‘em, they listen. Easy.

And so my little Peletonistas…. The price of a tour ticket is a seat at the 180 degree listening post. Pin ‘em back please, I feel wisdom a coming…

Dripping

Pros

·      Excellent preparation this year.

·      Did the most miles

·      Talked up his ‘yellow cap’ chances (more to follow on that subject)

·      Didn’t bonk

·      Looked like a giant in some photos

·      Has invented a new shade of pink (Dripink)

·      Didn’t crash

·      Shouted extra rides

Cons

·      ‘Yellow cap’ effort…. A little like that old Morecombe and Wise sketch… all the right clothes… just in the wrong order…

·      Still surging (although much enhanced ability means he now troubles those ahead as opposed to those behind)

·      Still saying a ‘hail Mary’ on every landing. “I always say it and we always land safely”… difficult to argue with… I’ll let Macca stew over the best way to explain correlation

·      Animal cruelty or butchering a pair of beautiful white leather Rapha shoes…. Which is the most morally disturbing?.. … answers stapled to a cat to the usual address please

JT

Pros

·      Got yellow (just).

·      Solid riding

·      Down-hill ability in marginally sketchy conditions was excellent. I watched whilst tailing him. Unusual.. but in mixed conditions, he’s too fast for me.

·      Booked the flights… did all the initial ride prep a couple of years back when he was in one of his awkward ‘between jobs’ situations…. You know the ones…. where he gets rumbled for extracting cash from a large corporate, then somehow manages to get even more cash from said corporate and then lands a promotion with another corporate… who export him to solve a problem (but still give him cash)… realise he ain’t letting go… and then…(it’s a strange noise if you’ve ever heard it)… the corporate just sighs… JT rubs one dry hand against t’other…. And the family moves on. (As an aside, I’m running a book on JT retiring at 50, golden handshake, golf handicap down to single figures, member of an exclusive club…. 3/1. I’m hedging that with an outside bet with the local bookies that sees him busted for snorting coke of the arse of a transsexual rent-person…8/1). Still… he asked for and took no credit for any of the planning this year…. but he deserved it. Well done sunshine.

Cons

·      He still likes to gently wake me at 3am by drinking 2 pints of water in a way you would imagine a parched elephant with a heavy cold might attack a half empty bath…. Seriously… I thought internal organs were going to felch from his nose…

·      People-tolerance levels still only marginally warmer than sub-zero

Damo

Pros

·      Every year we see a little bit more of the true cyclist. Crushingly consistent at the top of the pack

·      Nearly aced yellow as well as pink

·      Aced pink (not just a wrong righted from the year of JT’s catastrophic ‘we’re leaving the Euro’-type pronouncement either… )

·      Shoes

·      Bike

·      Bike

·      Bike

·      Cannondale

·      Bike

·      For Damo.. was surprisingly un-grumpy…and… rode back more than once for a straggler.

·      Bought me breakfast a few days later

·      Relentless replaying of the ‘red nose’ gag on Moley. It was a narrow bandwidth of attack, but it was superbly executed.

·      Cyclist mentality

Cons

·      Has a habit of being dismissive of exceptionally difficult rides. I remember Paris Roubaix… My Comment: “Fuck that was tough eh Damo… I ain’t doin that again…ever”……reply: “was alright.. I’d like to do the full route. It’s only as hard as you make it”.

·      A quiet Mr Sock this year

Macca

Pros

·      Well kitted out… as per…

·      New shit on his bike (it’s like a ‘where’s Wally’ game with Macca… we all know he’s got new shit going on…. But who can spot it?).

·      Consistent riding from the Robot

·      Bought me lunch and talked soothingly to me at the airport. Thank you Macca.

·      How the fuck can a man have that much time off work, not cycle and lose weight… I mean what the fuck…. If I had had a quarter of the ‘leisure time’ that our flying man has had… I would be the size of a house… even our old chum Amesy… he has to work 14 hour days just to keep his biscuit habit the right side of obsessive.

 I genuinely think Mark is half-man, half-machine. I’m going to have a chat with his roomy, Damo. I have a theory that when he goes to bed, he secretly plugs himself in to charge. You can bet your he’s got an Apple lightening connector…. Perish the thought that he would have something as vulgar as a kindle re-charging point.

A little like his over-sized iPhone charging case, Macca has additional spare batter capacity. We saw it a few years ago when he dressed all in white and revealed his penis to the world. (I say penis, on reflection I think we’ve found his charging point.)

Cons

·      Less tolerance than Trump (or should that be fewer, Mark?)

·      Has perfected the withering look (closely followed by the sarcastic smile). This little beauty is normally reserved for Dripping and I when we have the temerity to propose some sort of cycling knowledge… I mean… the very thought….

·      One of 2 people who constantly correct my grammatical meanderings. (In my view apostrophe’s should be used gushingly and with abandon)

Colchester Mac

Pros

·      Enthusiasm

·      Enthusiasm

·      Enthusiasm

·      Dug deep and rode consistently

·      Nearly witnessed our joint demise atop Stelvio… who’d have thunk it… both nearly killed by a motorcycle falling from the sky

Cons

·      Shouting 2 words and 2 words only at Italians (‘Bon journo’… I can still hear it at night when I listen to the wind on cold evenings)

·      Descending as if riding a tandem. Why have the safety of distance when you can have the knife-edge of proximity!

RTA

Pros

·      Very very nearly got Pink.

·      Very strong riding

·      Modest

·      Sacrificed the most difficult climb… one he would have aced.. to support Drip… top effort RTA and it didn’t go unnoticed.

Cons

·      Only one thing here to see folks…. The fake home-made Rapha shoe.

Moley

Pros

·      Took the stick from Damo with broad shoulders

·      Always smiling…

·      The seminal tour moment for me goes to Moley.  Day 3 had me looking deep into my soul… I’ve never crested a more difficult combination than Mortirollo followed immediately by Gavia. I genuinely think it took me near to my cycling edge of pain. But Moley… he laughed in the face of my anguish and he went deeper…. I’ve never seen a man so wracked by the utter effort and ensuing exhaustion… the day Moley crashed through the saloon doors atop Gavia, cowboy-style, slumped down in his seat…. Tears in his eyes, will live with me a long time….a truly heroic effort. No one worked harder that day.

·      Best bike bag by some margin

Cons

·      Starts talking about his chances of winning pink a good 6 months in advance

·      He has publically confused the sun with the moon. Tricky heavenly bodies to differentiate, admittedly. One a sphere of hot plasma, about 300,000 times the mass of the earth, accounting for 99.86% of the total mass of the solar system…. The other a debris strewn dead lifeless satellite with a reflectance marginally greater than asphalt…. I mean it’s a tough spot even with a sharp eye….

 And finally….. me

Pros

·      Didn’t fuck up the planning

Cons

·      Nowhere near enough mileage

·      Didn’t make nearly enough of the Moley ‘moon/sun-confusion’ moment

·      Nearly killed a man in a wheel chair along with the pensioner pushing him

  …and there we have it. Another one is under the belt and locked into the memories

My final reflection takes me back to Damo’s comment in the Alps a couple of years back….

‘Wherever you are, be there’..

When I ride in the mountains and I look up…I am always, always there. Always. The high mountains…..my favourite riding.

Tour selection for G18 will start shortly.

Ride safely my little fuckerettes….

Hoppo

[ruubzway-blog]

Becoming a black man: as more people of color transition between genders, the ways that racism is different for men and women come to the surface.

He also believed in which God created miracles. 7 train in Queens, she realized that she was becoming followed by a man. they [Black trans men] can speak with us concerning being women, along with we could talk to them about DWB." Mitchell concurs. What he we had not counted in had been changing the means by which he drove. Within a number of months involving starting male hormones, "I got pulled over 300 % a lot much more than I had in the prior 23 many many years of driving, almost immediately. in Brazil, a court ruled within August 2007 that sexual-reassignment surgery will be covered by the particular constitution as being a healthcare right. "More than the actual usual trans man, I'm any Black man," Mitchell says. so he had been somewhat surprised about the changes that will came after he began taking injections with the hormone testosterone--the degree in order to which in turn he became any target as well as the emotional changes he felt like a Black man. [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Near the finish involving 1970, when Mitchell was 18 a extended time old, he hitchhiked with a pal in order to Corpus Christi. Finally, he could be taken seriously through the guys at House Depot. Regarding example, your woman says, there is actually lots of hostility within the white transgender neighborhood towards Christianity, and some of the will be justified. Talking to Mitchell, it's straightforward to imagine him in the pulpit. With the actual chronilogical age of three or perhaps 4, he knew that he would become a boy, no matter having been born into a girl's body. "Many with the items that I notice in the globe and lots of of the items that I react to in the world have an overabundance to accomplish using how I am treated as a Black man as opposed to how I am handled as a trans man." Roberts also highlights yet another tiny however important detail associated with trans life for folks involving color: There's any amount of animosity between trans ladies as well as men inside the white community that does not are present to the identical diploma inside the Black community. "We had been almost all raised inside a church." Trans men of colour are finding which some things stay the same on both facets in the gender equation. "I'd maintain intensive treatment by the time these people realized I was a new trans man." She concedes your woman knew which Asian women had been exoticized, but "it's a essential factor reading with regards to some thing in the guide and another to end up being operating along the street." Mitchell furthermore finds in which he's inside a special situation now to mentor small Black men. Gomez says that a guy would phone him a new "bitch" and then leave it from that. Regarding example, several a lengthy time before transitioning, he ended up questioned by a cop for simply sitting in his own car late at night. Cultural expectations, with regard to example, are hard to shake. Inside typical men's locker-room humor, his sergeant produced a penalty jar where the cops needed to deposit 0.25 if they referred to Ward by method of a female pronoun. At the conclusion of the day, Roberts furthermore says, "People don't see me like a trans woman. This ended up being the first occasion the health-related clinic in the United States performed the particular surgery, and thus while it remained uncommon in order to be approved with regard to surgery, it was at least a possibility. Listening to always be able to Monica Roberts, it's difficult to imagine a time when she wasn't a new leader. She's adamant which Black trans people need their own spaces. "She sees here is man, nevertheless your woman understands this man can be the girl daughter." [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Prado Gomez, the 33-year-old Chicano that transitioned throughout 2001, describes the actual circumstance along with racism and also violence as a "trade off." Now Park finds herself occasionally the target around the subways inside New York City, where the lady lives. "At a few point they would discover I was female" as well as that might diffuse your situation. At the actual time, a Black transsexual woman had already been the first person to be able to undertake sex reassignment surgery in John Hopkins University, according for you to Joanne Meyerowitz's classic book How Sex Changed: A History of Transsexuality in the United States. Avon Wilson's transition in 1966 with John Hopkins marked any turning point pertaining to the transsexual community. Your transition around the job had been no small feat, since it meant relocating for the men's locker space along with showers. But Ward's coworkers and supervisors, like his family, accepted him. He didn't want to run the risk of drawing awareness of himself as a Black man and the girl as a mixed-race Latina that sometimes is actually perceived as white. . I can't be likely 90 miles an hour or so along the highway. Maybe it was due for the toll that living in the "tranny closet" had taken on the girl self-esteem. Texas, in which the legal drinking age group was lower than within California. Left largely unexamined, however, has been your issue regarding racism and how trans men and some women encounter it. [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] He fulfilled several Black trans men at a conference nevertheless took many many years to think concerning his own transition. "Cops known as me an asshole until they will noticed the particular F on my license," he recalls, and small verbal fights on the trail back then didn't escalate. It's difficult to say how many regarding these tend to be individuals of color, yet 1 on your internet group pertaining to Black trans people called Transsistahs-Transbrothas features about 300 members, and another group specifically regarding Latino trans men provides 98 members. It's distinct with regard to Black transsexuals, Roberts says. "There's a new great deal of information sharing ... while trans women inside many cultures get been marginally accepted, they will have been mostly limited to traditionally feminine roles as caretakers--a scenario which is changing now throughout places like Ixhuatan, Mexico, where Amaranta Gomex, any muxe, or even trans woman, ran for political office throughout 2003. Whenever he and the wife moved via California in order to the East Coast, Mitchell refused to allow the woman's drive around the cross-country trip. "She drives too fast," he says, chuckling and also adding, "I didn't want to get pulled over. He anticipated which he'd develop a beard, which usually he eventually would and enjoys now. she got positive reactions, your woman says, "because I was basically doing the actual classic perform involving Black females inside the community in terms associated with uplifting the race." Experiencing racism as a Black man, though, doesn't necessarily give Mitchell and also Ward the bond with their peers, which grew up in Black male bodies, experiencing racism as Black boys after which men. He finds that people now look at him along with concern in bars and restaurants where he when utilized to go for a excellent time. As somebody who came regarding get older inside the lesbian community and it has feminist politics, Mitchell jokes with Black boys who talk about "fags" and also reference women as "bitches." He pulls the teenagers aside as well as uses a little reverse psychology, telling them that will it's okay if they're gay. I became the enemy." Targeted pertaining to "driving while Black" wasn't new to Mitchell, who is 46 years old. "It is much more with regards to integrity and a a sensation of becoming the truest individual I could be," he says, adding that his gender transition has been concerning "having my insides and my outsides match finally." Rather than see himself as joining a bunch associated with men that are perpetual targets, he feels he's joined a new community associated with men which are strong however, not embarrassed with their tenderness. The transgender neighborhood provides experienced any boom inside visibility in the final decade. Louis Mitchell is the type of man who right away puts folks at ease as he advises them about how exactly inexpensive the housing is within Massachusetts. He calls himself "a large Black man" (he's 5 feet 9 inches tall and also 250 pounds). Several involving this originates with regards to through well-liked culture, including the particular acclaimed 1999 film Boys Don't Cry plus more recently with Mike Penner, the actual Los Angeles times sports columnist that arrived on the scene as transgender and it is now referred to become able to as Christine. Several of that is due for the fact that white trans females in many cases are dealing using a loss associated with energy within public life, while white trans men tend to be coming in order to positions involving energy and all its ensuing emotions and also consequences. Now, Mitchell finds which he doesn't engage within small transgressions similar to jaywalking or even spitting about the sidewalk. Inside 2006, after much soul searching, he began attending divinity school. "You may use a minister up here pontificating about the pulpit about Sunday," your woman says, "but the particular real energy at the rear of the throne will become the women's auxiliary that's meeting on Tuesday." Trans people involving color are usually discovering which they come along with an extremely different relationship to become able to gender transition when compared with white people. In case I'm going 56, I want being concerned." "More when compared with I'm the trans man, I'm a new Black man," he says. He knew his voice would deepen and that his relationship along together with his partner, family along with friends would change in subtle and, he hoped, good ways, all involving which in turn happened. Monica Roberts, who is 45 many years old, transitioned in 1994. Once the teens protest that will they're not, Mitchell says, "You have no respect for women, and you're simply fixated about gay men. It was astounding," says Mitchell, who's Black and transitioned while living inside the Bay Area region along with now resides in Springfield, Massachusetts. In short, individuals associated with color know that racism functions differently for men and women, as well as transgender folks such as Mitchell and also Ward are generally getting to experience this coming from each facets with the gender equation. "I perform a great offer of online shopping now," says Ward, that got tired of getting followed within e-book as well as garments stores. In the final 4 years, there's in addition been an boost in the number of individuals seeking top surgeries, or even elimination of their own breasts, according to Michael Brownstein. most of the particular leadership within the Black community is actually made up regarding very powerful women. she ran house and slammed the doorway shut. "I often wear shoes I may operate in," Park says. Johnnie Pratt, any Black trans man who lives in the San Francisco area, additionally jokes he now enjoys certain perks. "What I did not prepare for had been becoming a new Black man," he says. http://www.thefreelibrary.com/Becomingablackman:asmorepeopleofcolortransitionbetween...-a0173677740 However, Mitchell continued to spot as being a butch, even though he felt he has been masquerading as a lesbian. They Will observe me as Black ... There, he satisfied drag queens, and in which he felt hopeful for the really first time. Throughout the particular cross-country trip along using his wife Krysia, he refrained from being affectionate with asian tranny her throughout public. He will be simultaneously warmhearted along with sure of himself. The Actual widespread use of the World wide web and additionally the new on the internet social networks may additionally be helping to break the isolation that will trans individuals usually feel inside their own communities. Being an effeminate Asian male, Park says, "tends to--if anything--put an individual either in invisibility or derision, ridicule [and] harassment. but in the wedding it arrives for you to Black trans folks, she says, it's impossible to merely disappear from your church. "You can't omit Christians in the wedding you want individuals of color" from a conference, your woman says. The idea just is. He could offer a new two-bedroom condo just as easily as convincing a congregation to become honest using God. Roberts as well as the woman's Black trans-women pals possess experienced something else since transitioning: "We've noticed the power shift," your woman says. a small exchange associated with words could lead for you to more violence. A 44-year-old police officer, Ward began hormone treatment options inside 2004 and transitioned although operating for the LAPD, where he's now an instructor with law enforcement academy. The Lady in addition writes these days for a nearby LGBT outlet and also sites at transgriot.blogspot.com. and that's the thing that folks notice. Just what am I supposed to think?" Her father, any nearby radio commentator, attemptedto groom Roberts for leadership as his eldest child. "I didn't feel regarding it therefore much," he says with regards to cops. She didn't determine it had been as they observed the woman's as an Asian woman as well as a transgender Asian woman. The Lady understood the influence of Black women. I am a new Black man, and therefore if one thing can be stolen although I'm in the neighborhood, then I am the suspect." These social and also political changes possess ushered inside a period when it is increasingly suitable for men and a number of women to improve their physical bodies to complement his or her gender identity. He had grown used to ladies clutching their purses at the sight of him. Yet Roberts furthermore noticed a difference within the responses the girl received using their own company individuals to her leadership as a Black woman. but in case an individual are perceived being an Asian woman, what happens will be the exact opposite, which is sexual fascination and also even harassment." Mitchell already had a goatee without getting hormones along with had been used to getting followed in stores. "I never know if they're just awaiting one thing to occur in order to roll up, and also I do n't need locate myself in custody. There's a lot of this during my hometown." As Well As consequently as Roberts transitioned, she has stepped into that role. "I am the only one my mother trusts," he says. It's similar to gravity. "When people are afraid of you, a person quit wanting for you to hang out in these places," Ward says. Growing up within West Covina in Southern California, Mitchell attended church together using his mother and also devoured history books. That Will would be just precarious along with dangerous throughout so many ways." Ward, similar to Mitchell as well as Gomez, felt he had planned pertaining to just about each and also every adjust that will belly using transitioning. In certain countries, trans activists are going in order to court as well as winning crucial changes in public policies. Therefore he prayed which he'd develop into a boy's body when he reached puberty. but "he did certainly not really sweat me too much once he came up towards the automobile as well as divined that I was female," Mitchell recalls. Just as crucial continues for you to be the task regarding transgender individuals themselves, who have transitioned due for the a lot more widespread availability of hormones and surgeries. Park is currently 46 years old along with a founding member of the particular The Huge Apple Association regarding Gender Rights Advocacy, which in turn got legislation passed throughout The Huge Apple Town to protect transgender folks through discrimination within housing and employment. Mitchell says his manhood isn't concerning the racism he encounters. In transitioning via living as an Asian man to an Asian woman, Park found that she ended up being finally capable of have "the joy regarding actualizing something I've often wished to be," Yet the lady additionally finds that they has gone coming from invisibility to a visibility that's at times unwelcomed. When living in San Francisco, he moved out in the historical gay neighborhood of the Castro while he got tired of being followed in stores. While is common with regard to Latinas, Gomez features raised his brother's 2 kids together using his partner, Mariah, and is now taking care associated with his mom, which suffers via Alzheimer's disease, Gomez sees no contradiction inside the fact that like a man, he bathes his 60-year-old mother. Now in the Black male body, however, Mitchell may be pulled aside for little infractions. Her mother is a teacher, and he or even she has been surrounded by females who were historians and leaders in the community. The Actual important thing is, we're Black first." Pauline Park additionally found that transitioning to become able to become a woman of color altered the woman's place within the world. "I'll become capable of walk down the trail and never end up being raped, unless they are totally aware my status [as a new trans man]", he says. Inside 2006, she took over as third Black individual for you to get your Trinity Award, which recognizes individuals with regard to their contributions for the transgender community. A Korean adoptee who had been raised in the Midwest, Park transitioned in 1997 yet made a selection to not necessarily physically alter your ex body. The idea required a bit bit longer [to drive cross-country] 'cause I had to drive like a Black man. "It's will simply no longer some strange factor that they notice. Recently, when she got off the actual No. "But there's any various type of threat coming from men." LOUIS MITCHELL EXPECTED the great offer of adjust when he started taking injections regarding hormones eight years back for you to transition from a female body to the male one. London Dexter Ward, an LAPD cop who transitioned within 2004, sums it this way: a white person who transitions to a male physique "just became a man." Through contrast, he says, "I became the Black man. in current years, there's also been the developing number of memoirs, such as the Testosterone Files by the particular Chicano as well as American-Indian poet Max Valerio, as well as more academic publications on the subject, similar to the Transgender Research Reader. Roberts was raised throughout Houston, Texas, and in the Black church. Yet, it absolutely was merely following transitioning that Roberts felt in a position to adopt on this kind of leadership role. Now, Gomez is aware of he offers to be a lot more careful. Rather when compared with passing as heterosexual, an escalating number of these inside the final decade have got identified as "trans" and begun support, advocacy and also legal-rights groups. Then, 15 years ago, any friend of his began the complete procedure of transitioning into a male body. As more people regarding colour transition, Mitchell's experience is becoming an increasingly typical one. The exposure to racism is actually flipped in any few ways pertaining to Black trans women. In 2005, Roberts and other transsexual along with transgender activists started the initial conference with regard to Black trans people. "Black culture will be matriarchal-based ... Since a Black woman, she is satisfied for you to will simply no longer become considered, as the girl says, "a suspect." Since transitioning, she's got certainly not been pulled over for "driving while Black," although the lady rapidly adds that it has happened in order to a buddy whom can also be the Black trans woman. "It's a few living with regard to them, at this point," Mitchell says. that didn't happen, significantly to always be able to his surprise. While it's incredibly difficult to say how many individuals identify as transgender, your National Middle with regard to Transgender Equality has estimated that will around three million people are transgender nowadays in the United States. Prior To transitioning, he says, "They'd always be considering me like, 'Shut up girl.' Now they want to talk to me." Before transitioning, Gomez was utilized to getting pulled over within the car along along with his brothers simply by cops within San Francisco. any well-known physician specializing in gender surgeries throughout San Francisco. He can with regards to four for you to six top surgeries any week, and the particular man notes which although 3 decades ago, trans people would come to his office alone, these people are actually arriving together with partners, siblings and also buddies with regard to moral support. He didn't consider a lot of about racism. "That lit a new fire which I couldn't place out," he says now. The racism in which Black trans men encounter is just section of the story, regarding course. He considered the particular consequences of transitioning, which includes your impact on his mother, who he's very attached to, as well as the loss regarding him associated with his lesbian community. Daisy Hernandez is actually managing editor involving ColorLines. London Dexter Ward in inclusion has seen his lifestyle change because involving the ways in which racism is gendered. In Asia, Latin America and also Africa, the actual place associated with transgender people is likewise changing. In case your queens might be women, his thinking went, then there may be options for him to live as being a man. Before transitioning, Mitchell recalls becoming "cavalier and reckless" by what he would in public areas along with with regards to his interactions with police officers. The idea happened in Louisville, Kentucky, exactly where she now lives