#i'll finally get that kaveh fic done!!!!

[nc-vb]

I thought I had three exams in the next two days but I only have two!!!!!!! THEN I'M FREEEEEEEEEEEEEE

[caspersickfanfics]

Current WIPs

If anyone has thoughts/questions about any of these or is excited for a specific one please let me know as it might help me focus on a single fic for once LOL. Otherwise uhhhhh just wait a bit and hopefully I'll finish something up soon-ish.

Messy (500 words of brainstorming): Kaveh, sick out of both ends. Struggling bc idk how graphic I wanna get here 🙈

Too Feverish to Think (nearly 4000 words): somehow this has become two separate fics...... one where Cyno's emotional with Nari and another where he's convinced he's poisoned and doesn't want anyone to come near him (featuring Kaveh/Alhaitham and Tighnari ofc). Sneak peak to version 1 here.

Group Sickfic (1500+ words of brainstorming): seasick Cyno, Alhaitham, and Kaveh. Based on this HC post.

Waking up Puking (500 words): Link Click fic!!!!! Finally!!!!!! Sick Lu Guang cause I wanted to do something with the bunk bed situation but now it's giving me troubleeee

Away from Home (3500 words): Prequel to Sharing a Receptacle. Nari goes to the desert with Cyno and gets sick along the way. I wanna do backstory stuff with this one so it's still kinda in brainstorming phase

Out of Character (300 words): sick Kaveh! I'm scared to write him and Alhaitham, I'm not sure I can make them mean enough to each other and still capture the gay vibes

Migraine (5500+ words but only like 1200 are gonna stay... the rest I need to delete cause I hate it :) ): Tighnari has a migraine and is cranky with Cyno I've been working on this one for literal months why is it not done yet i'm going to scream!!!!!!!!!

Chaotic Body Temperature (600 words of brainstorming): Cyno gets a strange sickness after a trip to Dragonspine. Based on this HC post.

Fake "Faking It" (500 words of mainly brainstorming): Sick Arataki Ito with Kuki Shinobu as caretaker!

Evil Tighnari (500+ words of brainstorming): More of a psychological torture fic than a sickfic. Whumping all of the Sumeru gang but especially CynoNari ofc. Expanded on here, please check the warnings!

Kidnapped CynoNari (1800+ words): this one will have a lot of warnings and it's like. half torture half sickfic with a lot of handwavey plot stuff.

[caparrucia]

1 and 23

1. favorite fic you wrote this year

The best fic I wrote this year is resurgence (Malos-centric, Malos/Jin, Xenoblade Chronicles 2), which I know is a niche fandom and a niche story, but it's dear to my heart just because it really IS the best thing I've written in quite a while, like prose-wise.

But my favorite fic as far as "this is my baby" feelings, it's gotta be so we made the hard decision (Regis/Aulea/Titus, puppyverse AU, FFXV), which is a fic no one asked for, and therefore not a lot of people cared about, but goddammit, I've been meaning to write about that OT3 for literal YEARS and I finally got around to it. It's my favorite ship and my favorite OT3 dynamic and there's a lot of fun thoughts about disability, polyamory and just a ton of biting from three dysfunctional dipshits that, nonetheless, really fucking love each other. They deserve their happy ending even if their happy ending is full of biting each other til eternity.

I'm currently very happy with maelstrom soul, heart of stone (Zhongli/Childe, dragonheart AU, Genshin Impact) and a lot of it is "current fic" syndrome, but it's shaping up to be one of my favorites, too.

23. fics you wanted to write but didn’t

I'm treating this as a haven't yet, as a opposed to a didn't and never will: but there's companion fics for the other Genshin regions, that take place in the sake universe as the Zhongli/Childe fic. I started on the Zhongli/Childe fic, but once I'm done with that one, I'll pick up any of the other four.

The 4ggravate polycule fic I'm really looking forward to, mostly because Wanderer+Kaveh friendship is hysterical and Wanderer accidentally forcing the polycule to include Alhaitham without really realizing that's what he's doing is hilarious. It also includes my favorite scene which is Kaveh wholesale defenestrating Alhaitham right in front of Cyno, who always really thought if he ended up arresting a lover, it'd be Tighnari's ACAB ass.

There's an Inazuma fic I've been chewing on that's mostly Ayato casually dismantling the tricommission system to basically bully Ei to actually do her job and actually fucking RULE for once, and it's mostly a back and forth between him and Yae with the entirety of the Inazuma cast unwittingly or unwillingly playing the role of chess pieces. It also features a really fucking hilarious Ayato/Kokomi political marriage subplot and no one can't tell who started it or if they're pro or against it or if at any given time they're working towards or against it, and it's driving Gorou and Kujo Sara to drink heavily.

I have a few ideas for a Fontaine fic, but I'm waiting for the archon quests to wrap up before I start figuring out where the pieces go. Mostly it's about Neuvillette needing quite a few hugs, Wriothesley and Clorinde being the definition of BBF (Bisexual Besties Forever), Furina getting to be a person and failing miserably before she gets the hang of it and an eventual sappy, ridiculously saccharine Navia/Furina that triggers the "must protect!!!" instincts of anyone who happens upon it.

And there's of course the MondsDONT polycule shenanigans which is halfway done, and it's mostly Diluc navigating the codependant mess that is his partners, their partners, and Venti. Oh god, Venti. Fuck him. It's a mess. Beds are literally set on fire. Twice. It's fine.

[swanfrcst]

year end fic meme 2022!!!!

am i getting worse and worse each year 💀

Total number of completed stories: 3 on ao3. 3 on google docs that i haven't posted yet...i'll get around to posting those when i'm not feeling lazy jfaksndlf

Fics Posted:

On AO3:

The King's Avatar

left with a beautiful memory: my zhangjialefest2022 submission!!! tbh i never would have written this fic if not for really wanting to get something out for 02/22/2022 (even if i wasn't able to make the exact date), but i'm really happy i did write it in the end. it's always missing zhang jiale hours :''))) i am pretty happy with it tbh!! i feel like i was able to include a lot of my zjl headcanons/meta thoughts!

Good Hunting: this fic was a year and a half in the making!!! i am very proud of it actually. hmm what to even say about this! i think my prose slaps, i'm quite satisfied with the narrative, i had a mini breakdown about a stupid minor detail that waylaid the fic for months, and i wrote the last section, the transformation sequence, really early in the process and i'm still very happy with it!!!!! ahhhh having a fic i still feel this good about is really nice.

MDZS

(no) love left: a triple drabble i wrote for the seasons of drabble exchange! my first mdzs fic, and i still like it a lot! jiang cheng & wei wuxian is my favorite mdzs relationship, so ofc i had to take a crack at it :''')

not posted:

Genshin Impact

venti stormterror's lair fic: it's a fic about venti and his relationship with stormterror's lair! wrote it for the scenes of wonder genshin zine...so technically it's public and posted? i just haven't posted it on ao3 yet...if i do it the next few days i'll link it here :'') . i actually do like this one! wanted to exercise my descriptive writing muscles; i don't know how well i did but it was pretty fun to write

ganyu & liyue fic: in a very similar vein, it's a story about liyue changing through ganyu's eyes :') i'm....not super happy with this one ahahaha </3 which is also a reason it hasn't been posted yet. sigh i don't know how to clean it up though!! so the chances of me dumping it on ao3 is pretty low atm...maybe i'll throw it on tumblr first?? ahhh idk!

Witch Hat Atelier

Apprentice's Journey: a fic about qifrey and the girls i wrote for the hempishere witch hat atelier zine! i actually completely forgot about this fic....it was actually such a bitch to write. i had to rewrite it after the first draft was done because of shitty planning.....i'm still not satisfied with the final result but oh well :(

oHHHHHHHHH i just remembered i have some random drabbles?? i will...post those......maybe......maybe ill just . post them at the end of this post LMAO

Total word count: 9041 on ao3.

What WIPs are you working on?

added this question this year LOLOLOL i do have some """"active"""" wips!!!! it's mostly genshin!!!!!!!!! i have a ganqing wip i've been chipping away at for a while now that i do quite like :'D then.....two other genshin fic that i'm writing for two different free/open enrollment genshin zines! one is a lumine & albedo & venti fic that's just kind of about how all three of them are sussy non-humans. the other one is....a bit cringe LOL actually i don't even want to talk about it </3 it's supposed be yanfei & yelan with a fables theme but while i have an outline i do not like it very much :(

BTW my most exciting wip is a nahida & kaveh fic that is currently titled "nahida is my baby girl but kaveh is my babygirl. i hope you understand." however i word vomited a couple hundred freewrite words and now i have no idea how i want to keep writing it. pain pain pain.

i also?? wrote a couple hundred words for a sousou no frieren concept but ehhh that one's fighting me too. not enough meat on the concept sighhh

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d predicted?

actually...when you add in the stuff i haven't posted on ao3........including wips....i've written quite a lot! i just wish i had more to post :'')

What’s your own favorite story of the year?

good hunting :)

Did you take any writing risks this year?

hilariously, i think it's joining those two free zines 💀 i'm NOT good at writing to a deadline!!!!!!!! or a prompt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i don't really want to fail to submit something but i think im gonna flop lmao

Do you have any fanfic or ofic goals for the New Year?

lol...in this question last year i talked about my xsq & smc fic (good hunting) which i've actually finished!! i'm procrastinating on editing it, and actually want to post it for rare pair week so uhhh....yay to me for finishing it? but i guess my goals is to clean it up for rare pair week posting.

HIGHLIGHTING THIS FROM LAST YEAR BC GUESS WHO ACTUALLY FINISHED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Good Hunting is a fic i'm still proud of so :''''')))) WOOOOOOOOOOO

i also want to finish my 100 sentences blossom duo fic that i started when i first joined qzgs fandom for zhang jiale fest!! i would like to participate this year!!!

this did not happen hahahaha i wrote a whole new fic instead </3

anyway....my goals....write more i guess 😭 i want to write more things that aren't for posting!!! i have so many stupid and self-indulgent stories rattling around in my brain and i want to make some sort of record of them :''))) sometimes i think of banger lines too that get lost immediately afterwards too and itd be nice to save those :'')))

Most popular/most under-appreciated/most fun to write/story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters:

most fun to write was definitely (no) love left! my recipient had some REALLY banger prompts like dreams/nightmares so i tried to play a bit with that kind of atmosphere/imagery!!! i think it turned out pretty well.

Hardest Story to Write:

Apprentice's Journey, the fic I wrote for the Witch Hat Atelier zine. goddddd that fic was a nightmare to write!!! like pulling teeth!!!!!!!! i've discovered i am NOT good at planning. i need to think very hard about thematic through-lines but sometimes i end up fucking up anyway and need to rewrite the whole thing. but a good thing about this fic is i had some banger lines :))) and maybe i'll post the scrapped bits separately later.

Biggest Disappointment/Biggest Surprise:

None

***

random drabbles i dont really want to post elsewhere

crawl back to

in the burial mounds, wei wuxian is broken down and remade. piece by piece, the graveyard strips wei wuxian of flesh and bone. the shattered skeletons of animals and humans and creatures unidentifiable clamor hungrily. they are desperate. they are cruel.    

wei wuxian drags his body forward. he does not know where he is going. sometimes, he does not know if he is alive. wei wuxian has long passed knowing if he wants to be alive. 

he is limping—he is stumbling—he is crawling—his hands are wet and sticky. under the dim light of a sun he cannot see, a river of red burns against the barren dirt.

late

a chengqing au that appeals to one person (me) where jiang cheng saves wen qing because he thinks that keeping wen qing “hostage” in lotus pier might be able to convince wei wuxian to come home…

jiang cheng—sandu shengshou, sect leader, estranged shidi to the villainous yiling laozu—leaves for the burial mounds with a mission. 

he’ll succeed. he has to. surely wei wuxian won’t be able to deny him this time, not when he’s come prepared with a trump card. surely. 

later, when jiang cheng returns to lotus pier, his feet carry him directly to a secluded room. locked and warded, but not heavily. before he can form a coherent thought, he pushes open the door. 

inside: wen qing, sitting on a plain bed. she jerks to attention, hope glittering in her eyes. 

“...he’s not here,” wen qing says after a long moment.  

what can he even say? there are emotions he doesn’t have a name for digging a nest in the pit of his stomach. battering his ribcage. tearing into his beating heart. 

“by the time i got to him,” he rasps, the words like brambles scraping against his throat, “it was–” –i was– “–too late.”

dirt on your cheek

under the flickering candle-light, beidou is all languid grins and loose limbs. even here, in ningguang’s private chambers, beidou radiates sleek confidence.

ningguang lifts her hand to the handsome curve of beidou’s face, tracing the shadow of beidou’s eyepatch.

beidou lifts a questioning eyebrow.

“there was something on your cheek, that’s all,” ningguang says. her fingers linger for a moment longer.

laughing, beidou pushes her down onto the bed. “can’t have anyone think the great ningguang is sappy, huh?”

ningguang lets herself fall gracefully, a pleased smile curling up her lips. “i suppose you’d know a little something about that.”

[slowips]

I saw your post about your planned works for 2023! Ngl I may end up stealing that idea (if it's alright with you). Maybe putting the word out that I'm working on things will give me the motivation to finish HAHA. I'm excited for your Gorou one! o3o

Your answer got the darkest themes was really interesting though! With the push for everything to be like... idk. Moral? A lot of more sensitive topics get pushed to the side bc we don't want to seem like we condone those things even though we find them interesting to explore and write about. It kinda sucks at times. That being said. That first one is one I'd never be able to write. LOL Not because of my personal feelings on the matter, but because I'd be writing it like, "If they just COMMUNICATED, this WOULDN'T have HAPPENED." Miscommunication/lack of communication is my pet peeve. LOL Granted, it's not always that simple, alas, I oversimplify things uwu

((Also the funny thing abt the third one. I actually have a non dark fic abt something similar. For shock factor, something sorta similar ends up happening in the fic, but you find out that the person/reader has been consenting to it for literal years. It's an Albedo fic lol. Idk how I'm gonna post it tho bc I'll probably have to make a cw, but idk how I'm gonna do that while also conveying the message that it's a completely PG story))

I write my stories the same way though. Like I have a general idea of what I want to happen, but I need to write everything chronologically. When I can't write the next part, the story ends up stuck in the shelf for months... Or sometimes I don't know what to write next so I write multiple routes and then everything gets mixed up lol

You're very diligent with getting into character's heads though! I kinda do the same with my research, but I don't have a written psychoanalysis of them. I mentally compare them with my experiences irl with ppl, etc, and then use that to make assumptions. As for voice, when I'm thinking of making them say something, I try to imagine the VA saying it. If I can't hear it, I change the wording. LOL

I'm looking much forward to Kaveh's release though!!! I want to see what he's like away from Alhaitham. Seeing him in Alhaitham's story quest just made me... sad. But take your time playing it! Also no worries on replying to my long replies too! LOL I can only reply when I'm mentally ready which sometimes takes weeks haha... Or like you, after I've done the appropriate research. Like I still need to reply to that ask you sent a while back. Still trying to figure out how to word myself at one part.....

feel free to share with ur your wips! i'm not the first to do it, and i LOVE reading people's wips. something about seeing it grow to its final form... (emotional). can't wait to see what you'll be giving us for 2023, hehe.

i think another reason why writing of such themes is not prevalent is because (1) it's mentally draining to write, (2) it's hard to gauge a stranger's threshold for such things, and most importantly (3) people who write fanfiction are just here to see their favourite characters in scenarios they like—for tooth-rooting fluff or gut-destroyer angst.

but, yeah, it sucks that people assume you support such things just because you write them. personal take is that writing is powerful because, if an author plays their cards right, it makes you think. it's a great way to explore the grey areas of life. can be very dangerous if consumed thoughtlessly though.

i scream at miscommunication when the thing that happens as a result of it doesn't do anything to move or develop a character. just. drama. i believe that's what ruined the love triangle trope for many? correct me if i'm wrong, lol. but as much as i find the trope annoying too, i have my own fair share of miscommunication. (at least it gives me character growth, LOL.)

a rating tag will definitely help. marking it as teens and up or mature with cw is already a warning that the fic heavily deals with the themes, but if it was pg i would assume it's just a brief mention. (can't wait to read it... even if i know about the shock factor so it's not shocking anymore, haha)

LOL the alternate endings... so true. right now my cyno fic has 3 routes. thankfully, i've narrowed it to 1... the problem is the scenes needs to be re-arranged with the scene i've not written being the introductory scene. if that's the case, i might as well rewrite the whole thing, right? (my brain doesn't work normally, help). on the bright side, i can say i wrote a lot this year, lmao.

i like the idea of comparing characters with your personal experiences! i saw you compare kaveh and alhaitham's relationship with your own, and that was so mind-boggling. it gives a unique spin to each character. (adopting your headcanon, sdfds)

thank you for your compliment, though i can't say i've been diligently jotting down notes. i only have cyno's for the longfic i plan to write for him. you gave a nice tip for writing dialogue. will think about it for my next fic except... sometimes i think about their dialogue in chinese-ish sounds, and then i don't really know how to translate it, HAHA.

if kaveh is a 4* star i'll cry because my luck with them is horrible. (i only got gorou last patch. unforgivable.) i hope he gets a hangout. i want to know what he does in his spare time, on his understanding of kindness, etc. you're right we should get more kaveh development outside of alhaitham. so far, he's just been That Character that sells alhaitham.

haha, i prefer thoughtful replies so i don't mind the wait :3c thank YOU for sharing with me your views. it means a lot to me, hehe.