#i'll give it a 5% chance some version of that was in the script but he still said it like a madman | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tygerbug · 5 years

Note

Do you have any advice for aspiring filmmakers without an actual cast and crew and (as of right now) no ability to get a formal education? Tips on what to practice or challenges so when I actually start involving people, I'll have a decent grasp on what I'm doing?

This is a big topic to discuss. I’m gonna write a long one here and reminisce a bit about movies I made a long time ago. Hope you’re into that sort of thing.

Shoot some footage on your own, record some sound and learn how to edit! I was on a Mac so I used the now very outdated Final Cut Pro 7 for many years. Adobe Premiere Pro is more standard. I used that when I started out, and I use it more now, along with After Effects. I originally trained on an ancient version of Avid as well.

Try to get a single friend to help you! That will help. But you can also do animation, or film yourself, or film scenery, or voiceover. There’s plenty you can do on your own.

I started in the 90s, when camera technology was terrible. The cameras now are amazing! The economy is not. I started to have trouble making movies because I need to pay bills! It’s a cliche but people’s phones are better than anything we had then.

Currently I have a Panasonic Lumix G7 DSLR which shoots 4K, and cost maybe $450. I used to know every feature of my camcorders and be in complete control, but I honestly don’t understand this one as well as I should. It’s nice though.

Before that, in 2007, I had a Panasonic MiniDV camcorder which must have cost $4500 or so. I was still using it for some things until recently, when it started eating my tapes.

I have a Sennheiser cardioid XLR mic (from 2007), and a Tascam audio recorder hooked up to it (from 2019). Maybe $150 altogether. I’ve somehow had the same microphone stand since 1993, maybe longer.

I also have a Parrot teleprompter mirror, for when I need to record web videos and read text off a screen.

We bought a heavy expensive tripod in 2007 and I found it difficult to use. I probably broke the damn thing. It wasn’t working well. I was used to much lighter, cheaper tripods, and kept using my old one. Then I ended up buying two tripods cheaply. I think both were Goodwill finds!

I still have an enormous greenscreen setup we bought in 2007, very wrinkly now and rarely used.

With the old MiniDV cameras (or before that Hi8, 8mm and VHS) you needed a lot of light to get any kind of decent picture. I’d buy a $20 shop light from Home Depot and point it at the wall. It was very hard light, but bouncing it off something would diffuse it and light up the room. It was also very yellow and we’d put a blue theatrical gel over it to change that. It was also very hot and would make the room tough to film in! We also had little clamp lights with regular light bulbs in them as needed. You can get that stuff at Home Depot or similar for cheap.

Cameras today are a lot better, and even if the footage is grainy you can noise reduce in post with plugins like Neatvideo. You’ll want to be more subtle with your lighting than I had to be back then. But a lot of times you’ll still want a powerful light that will light up the room in a clean-looking way. Even then I’d often work with cinematographers for a more subtle feel. They would put diffusion material over the lights, or black foil to concentrate a more powerful light into a single beam. It’s worth experimenting.

I guess I’ll get very personal with this and talk about my whole history, because I’m like that.

I started out making movies as a kid in the 90s. I started out doing little animations on my own, which grew into a 90-minute sketch comedy feature (I was 15-17). I attempted to involve my friends from high school, but it was hard to get them to commit and show up, so a lot of that film was just me doing animation and puppets to fill the gaps. Once I premiered it, everyone got very excited at what I had accomplished without much help and wanted to be involved. I worked with them to figure out what they were interested in filming, and they contributed to the scripts and concepts and production.

We shot four more comedy features in the first half of that year, before I left for college (USC Film School in Los Angeles, 1999), often with a big cast and in all kinds of locations. I was also writing a satirical musical play at the time, and was starting to try to be a screenwriter (I eventually wrote about twelve unproduced screenplays). The main feature we shot that summer was a 2-hr parody of Star Wars: The Phantom Menace which would have been my first “real” screenplay, and which was based partly on the ideas of others in my friend group. There was some improv to the comedy. We also shot a 5-hour improv piece which was a comedy-drama (and then cut down to feature length) and which aged better.

I came back the next summer and shot two more similar features (which were in the same style as the Phantom Menace spoof and the improv piece respectively). I also ended up collaborating with other filmmakers on some stuff, which I ended up regretting due to the people involved. And I made student films, and a big, overlong drama feature while I was in college called Gods of Los Angeles (which took about three years). Later in 2007-9 (ages 25-28 or so) I directed Shamelessly She-Hulk, a superhero feature which is on Youtube. I also did more animation, and some quick, low effort webseries and web video stuff on my own, and I continue to do so. I’m currently working on some Unannounced Projects.

I often think that moving to Los Angeles and attending USC Film School was a mistake. It’s an easy town to get lost in and just sort of fade away and disappear, even before the economy crashed and things got a lot more expensive over the past 20 years. At any rate, my film education at USC was similar to my film education outside of it- The teachers would just tell us to pick up a camera and go, and do our best with it. It wasn’t very formal. What film school did provide was an audience- Your fellow students would all give notes tearing your student films apart, and I had to get a lot better very fast to keep up and deliver quality filmmaking.

So my advice is that you don’t really need a formal education in film to make movies, at least if you’re starting out and doing your own stuff. What you really need is to be young and have a certain amount of financial support on your side. Once I got older and had to work and pay my own rent during an economic recession, it was a lot harder to make films. If you’re still living with your parents, great! Or if you’re in an okay financial situation, great! Use whatever resources you’ve got.

Mainly you need free time, and people to help you. There’s a lot you can do on your own. As I said, my early experiments as a kid filmmaker were pretty much done on my own, and I sometimes had to create scenes on my own for every movie that followed. I might do a quick pickup shot, or re-record some voiceover. Making movies on your own isn’t an ideal way to work, of course, but a lot of people on Youtube are doing it!

I learned a lot about filmmaking by simply doing it. I’d made something like twelve features by the time I was out of college. Nothing I would still want to watch today, but I learned a ton by doing them. I expected I’d become a Hollywood filmmaker, but making that happen takes money and resources and connections I didn’t have (and still don’t). People don’t want to admit it, but it takes money to get noticed at all in Los Angeles. And when you’re older and need to pay bills, time is also money, so it’s very hard to find the time to work on projects unless you have some money in your bank account. If you have money and time in Los Angeles, you can go to more events, meet more people, pay to enter your scripts into contests and things, and there’s not much of a chance you’ll get noticed by doing that either. But money and time allow you to make more art and try again.

At any rate, if you’re just starting out and learning, there’s plenty you can do on your own, but ideally you want to have a partner who is just as interested as you are, at least during the shooting. I have often spent years editing feature film footage on my own. WhoSprites, Shamelessly She-Hulk, The Thief and the Cobbler Recobbled Cut and Gods of Los Angeles all took years to edit. But the actual shooting of She-Hulk and Gods of Los Angeles and all my earlier features was usually done very quickly.

If you’re young and working with friends and collaborators to create a feature, like I did many times in my teens and twenties, there’s a certain momentum which is key, and very easy to lose. You can get a group of young people together to film a feature for a week or a month, and they’ll work very hard. All the features I ever shot were like that, where I had one or two main collaborators who were there every day for a week or a month or a few months, and we just worked and worked and worked, while other people came in and out.

The movie I did in college, Gods of Los Angeles, I flew my friend Dave in to star in it. That was summer 2002 and we had maybe a month to shoot with him, as well as do a road trip to South Dakota for an amateur film festival where we shot some other stuff as well. We worked on the movie every day. Other actors would come and go but I only had Dave as an actor for that period. Sometimes we were sleeping on the floor at a friend’s place before filming there - we were all over town. Dave lost weight in the desert on the road trip. But we had that momentum to get as much of the film done as we could. It was this ridiculous long script, like four hours worth of story. We ran out of time and I ended up cutting a whole act out and shooting a rewritten ending the morning Dave had to get on the plane back to Connecticut.

We had that momentum to work and get the feature done. We were young and in college, and it was summer. We had no bills to pay. We had free time. We shot most of the feature during that month. We worked around every other actor’s schedule but Dave and I were there every day.

After that, and when the school year began again, production was a lot slower. Trying to get any actor to show up for a shoot was tough. We went months inbetween shoots and it took a long time to finish the last few scenes.

I did notice I’d gotten a lot better as a filmmaker during that shoot. We had filmed Dave’s stuff during this crazed rush, and all the later stuff I was able to shoot in a much more controlled way. No-budget filmmaking, in my experience, is always a disaster. Everything goes wrong and you prove your worth as a filmmaker by rolling with it and still getting the scene done even if you don’t have that actor or that location or whatnot.

You learn a lot by just doing it, as a filmmaker, and it helps to be young and without bills to pay. If you have one good collaborator who is willing to really join you on this journey for awhile, for a week or a month or parts of a few months, you have a movie. All of my movies were like that.

Los Angeles never agreed with me, physically or in any way. I moved to Los Angeles 20 years ago, and left ten years later. I spent that whole first ten years wanting to leave. I knew immediately when I stepped off the plane that I’d made a big mistake. I did leave, for five and a half years, and then ended up back here. I had big dreams, but everyone in this business has big dreams. I expected Hollywood, but it felt more like tripping and falling into a white-walled room which locks behind you and sinks down into the ocean, and nothing else happened for twenty years.

So I’d often leave Los Angeles for awhile to make a movie with friends elsewhere. I went back to Connecticut one summer, and I went to the Midwest twice (a mistake), and roadtripped to South Dakota. I had just unsuccessfully tried to move back to Connecticut one Christmas in 2006, and ended up in some shitty apartment with two people who were trying to kill each other. Pretty typical for my Los Angeles experiences. It’s just a dangerous town when you don’t have money. You always feel like a criminal, and I can no longer count the situations I lived through where my life was threatened. That was almost a constant.

I needed to get out of there, and someone I’d met while doing stand-up comedy called me. He had a rich mother, and he was bored and wanted to learn how to make a horror film. For the hell of it I’d written this script about Marvel’s She-Hulk character. I’d written it in a week. My scripts usually took a year but this was an easy write. He read it, and he decided we should film that script.

I did warn him that it was a fanfilm, so we could never really make money from it, or release it on video, or show it at festivals, especially back then. I don’t think he fully understood that until we were four months into production and had shot most of the film, at which point he shut things down.

But for four months we worked together every day. Our She-Hulk actress came in pretty much every day for a few weeks to film on greenscreen. A lot of times we were shooting one actor at a time because of scheduling, and we pretty much shot the whole thing in that apartment in Santa Monica. I’d put sticky paper up to turn the walls green or black. We just kept at it, getting through a huge amount of material every day. It’s not great to shoot a big superhero feature one actor at a time. That was tricky to edit together later. But working with one actor, or two actors, at a time, is very controllable. You’re not wasting anyone’s time. You don’t have scenes where one of the actors doesn’t have much to do. They’re always working. Sometimes we had a bunch of people onset at once, and sometimes that was more chaotic. It did mean we had more people to work the lights and sound and effects. It can be tricky to get Los Angeles actors to commit to this sort of thing. You’re never sure who you can really rely on and who is going to flake out on you. We ended up shooting with fewer actors and less crew, and doing our best with it.

And when you’re not paying people, sometimes actors will quit on you. We lost one of our two lead actresses on She-Hulk, and by the time I’d recast her months later we didn’t even have money anymore, or most of the original actors. I was shooting on my own for no money. We had auditioned 400 people for the film. It was a huge, long process where I called in anyone in Los Angeles who would work for no money. But some of my first choices didn’t want to actually do the film in the end. I got my first choice for She-Hulk, and got the best people for the parts. But I recall that original actress saying she’d rather be waitressing and making money.

It was always easier to find great actresses who weren’t working. Finding guys who were any good was always tougher. On my college movie Gods of Los Angeles in 2002, I kept losing the male actors I originally cast in every single part, after a day of filming. They weren’t willing to spend that much time on such a ramshackle, no-budget feature where I was learning as I went. The women were all cast from the start, and stayed put.

I shouldn't admit this, but on both Gods of Los Angeles and Shamelessly She-Hulk I eventually had to cut scenes and edit around some male actors, who hadn't quite completed their entire parts, but had come close.The people who stayed, stayed because they believed in the project. We didn't have much money, but I was always a good dialogue writer, and was writing very meaty parts that actors enjoyed playing, even under the circumstances. And the circumstances were messy. (Screenplay structure was more of a weak point, though I got better at that too in my unproduced work.)

She-Hulk was a big role - she had tons of dialogue to get through - and we often shot her alone. We just kept working, and we had that momentum, and we wrapped her part in a couple weeks. Finishing the rest of the film later was a slower process.

But it’s about working within people’s schedules. That gets harder the older you get, because people have bills to pay and things to do.

On She-Hulk, one older actor usually had a beard for other roles. I wanted him to shave it for the part. One day he told me he’d shaved his beard and would want me to shoot his whole part in the next three days or so. We were already booked up for those days with lots of shooting with other actors. But we brought him in at night, and shot most of his part alone. Or in the morning, when he was already starting to grow the beard back.

I once shot a comedy feature in a week, where we all became horribly sick and injured in a dozen different ways. The director was depressed and not in the mood, and in retrospect was bullying me the whole time I knew him. It was horrible, but we still shot the feature in a week.

The Phantom Menace parody was filmed over a month or two, as was the one we did the next year. In both cases I was working every day with Dave, and other people would come in and out depending on their availability. So we had that momentum.

We also found time to shoot a comedy/drama improv feature. I had two collaborators on that first one, and we rehearsed for a couple of weeks while shooting the other movie, then shot the whole damn thing in one night. We tried to do it again the next year but everyone was too tired. We hadn’t really had a break, and Dave had barely slept all month.

Looking at the footage from those (summer 2000) movies later was a turning point for me. I was a dumb kid of about nineteen making dumb movies on low quality video cameras, but I was also a perfectionist. And I lost my temper a lot on that shoot, while trying to get my friends to take the shoot seriously and get the footage I needed.

As a director, if you lose your temper you’ve lost control of your film. You’ve lost the respect of those around you. It’s not going to get them to take you seriously. A director needs to be the nicest guy onset. You’ve got to make people comfortable, and feel like their contributions are valued. They should feel safe, and comfortable enough to give their best work to you. You need to earn their respect. If you have the right collaborators, they will do brilliant work for you, if you let them be themselves.

I was tough, as a director. I would shoot a lot of takes, until I knew I’d gotten the footage I needed in the edit. With enough preparation, four takes should be enough, but it’s not unusual for me to see 16 takes in the edit for more complex scenes. We wouldn’t do a ton of rehearsing. We’d shoot and fix problems on the fly.

I wouldn’t lose my temper. I’d just ask them to do it again, until we had a version where nothing went wrong technically, or with the performance. If an actor isn’t playing the scene right, it’s usually a bad idea to tell them how to read the line. It’s unprofessional but it’s also not how actors work. Fixing the exterior performance is phony. They need to feel and understand the scene inwardly. If they’re not playing the scene right, you haven’t explained it right, and you need to talk to them for a bit about what their character is feeling.

Or maybe it’s just a dumb scene and the actor isn’t feeling it. While looking back at the She-Hulk movie, there are a few lines which make me cringe, which I wish I’d rewritten. Easy jokes, which border on offensive or vulgar and don’t suit the character or the film.

I was looking at the raw footage from one of those scenes recently. I knew the line was bad at the time, and clearly I feel awkward directing the actress to say it. I ask if she can say it with a little more feeling, since she was playing it off very flatly, as if embarrassed of the line. She said “No, because it’s a stupid line!” The footage cuts off there. She wasn’t wrong. We should have rewritten the line, and she gave the best performance she could under the circumstances, because she needed to communicate that her character was embarrassed of the line too.

When I was making movies in college, I was still embarrassed that I’d lost my temper during the shoot in summer 2000. I was trying to be nicer as a director while still pushing hard enough to get the shot. I overcorrected. I have wavy hair which gets unmanageable unless it’s cut very short. I would let my hair grow longer than that, and I’d really look like a mess. A scruffy kid with glasses and mad scientist hair, wearing a red windbreaker jacket and scuffed-up jeans. I looked like a slob! I thought it helped the actors relax and not have to take things as seriously. I grew up in Connecticut as this gifted overachiever, always pushing very hard and being very intense about things. In California I was learning to slow down, and calm down, and go with the flow. I think it helped me, but I went with the flow so much that nothing ever happened in my career for twenty years!

But some of that was just that I wasn’t presenting a serious image to the world. I was presenting the image of a guy who really hated himself. I thought of myself as a clown. I felt bad that I was making my actors work so hard and do so many takes, and I thought I had to be the guy onset who was making things seem much more relaxed and casual, but also pushing them very hard to do brilliant performances and shoot a lot of takes. I should have loved myself more, enough to clean myself up and look professional onset. My appearance was at odds with the high-level filmmaking I wanted to do, because my self-esteem and self-image wasn’t there.

As a creative in Los Angeles, at least to an extent, you are who you pretend to be. The industry is full of pretenders. The industry is biased toward people with money and connections, but people with money and connections are also just more presentable. I had very high standards for the filmmaking I was doing, but I looked and acted like a weird kid! It’s amazing that anyone took me seriously enough to work with me. To an extent I had trouble making friends and felt very isolated, especially among people who really wanted to work in the industry. My friends tended to be people who didn’t fit in either, and who wanted to leave Los Angeles at the first opportunity. I took myself very seriously as an artist, but a lot of people at USC took me at face value instead, and seemed to hate me instantly! Young people can be very cruel. Well, all people can be very cruel.

I used to do stand-up and improv as an idiot character called Radio Man. When I’d perform him live on campus, people would treat me like I actually was this ridiculous character. I was thrown offstage by security several times! Maybe I should have pretended to be cool!

I feel like that was partly my problem with networking and trying to make friends in the industry and get work that way. This is an oversimplification, but I felt like the mindset in Los Angeles was very different. Not better or worse than New York and Connecticut, but upside-down. New Yorkers can be gruff until they get to know you, and they’re more open with how they’re really feeling. People in Los Angeles tend to wear a mask at first. They want to smile and seem pleasant and impress people in a non threatening way, and it’s a front. You find out what they’re really like later, if they like you. You see their dark side. I’m generalizing of course, but I was never a very social person, and this was all backward from what I was used to. People were being very guarded and false when I was trying to be open and truthful, and vice versa even! I was zigging, they were zagging. I felt like people hated me immediately wherever I went! Or at least couldn’t figure me out and weren’t impressed. I wasn’t great at putting up a front and impressing people. And in Los Angeles it’s hard to impress people anyway. You’re talking to creators, who are all boasting about what they’re doing as a multi hyphenate. At that point I’d made a bunch of features as a writer/director/editor, but I was still a dumb kid with few resources and no connections.

Youtube has changed everything, but it’s also not a filmmaker’s medium. Most of the people who are getting successful on Youtube are doing video essays as themselves, straight to the camera. People aren’t really getting known for making short films and features like we used to do. I still remaster material from the 2007 She-Hulk production for Youtube, and it feels very out of place with everything else that Youtube is.

That can be a positive, I suppose. It’s not a big deal for a filmmaker to record themselves doing video essays and reactions, and Contrapoints for example has stepped up that game with her colored lighting and aesthetics, bring a feature-film quality to Youtube.

I’d like to think there’s room for lots of different kinds of content on Youtube, and as a small creator it’s unfortunately very hard to get seen, so you might as well create what you like, and what really matters to you. The algorithm seems to push certain kinds of content (including some gross political content which is definitely helping cause the end of the world). The algorithm is also impossible to predict.

I had barely touched my main Youtube channel in eight years until recently. That was a mistake. I was sort of grandfathered in as an older channel, and once I put up new content in 2018, sometimes the algorithm would smile on me and give me millions of views. But it’s impossible to predict. One or two popular videos and the rest go thud.

I considered that a channel for the She-Hulk movie and my Doctor Who animations, and other filmmakery stuff. But I’d stopped editing that film, and was doing some very dumb web videos on my own instead for awhile, which I uploaded on another channel. I started other channels for my film restoration work. I hadn’t considered Youtube as a career. It was simply an outlet for the various things I was doing.

If I was starting a new channel now, I wouldn’t be getting the views I get on the old channel. It’s probably best to do everything in one place, do it well and make it easy to find.

As for the other stuff, the filmmaker stuff - actually learning how to make a film - just do it. You’ll learn as you go.

In my high school movies, these early comedies, I barely knew where to put the camera at all. At first I was shooting long wide shots, then some closeups. All very basic stuff. I was leaning heavily on the dialogue. Without dialogue I didn’t have a movie. There were only a few sequences I storyboarded or even shot a lot of angles for. Usually it was when we were parodying an existing movie, and recreating their shots. That was always fun- recreating a famous big-budget Hollywood movie on a budget of zero, and making it work somehow.

I learned a little more each time for sure, but in film school we had to do these little short films with no dialogue. I was leaning on the same style I’d had in my high school comedies. My first couple of shorts had the same goofy feel. One of them used pop culture references instead of having characters and story. And without dialogue that didn’t work. It was about some friends of mine as an action-hero fighting team (and not a very impressive one). It was pretty dumb.

This was for a class (in 2001) which originally shot on 8mm film, so it had to be silent. We were shooting on MiniDV instead, so we could have shot dialogue, but that’s not what the class was about.

I couldn’t use any of the tricks I’d had in my comedies. I had to tell a story without dialogue- something that people could take seriously. I didn’t even know how to get a performance out of someone without dialogue, which became immediately apparent. I couldn’t use any of my strengths, and that was great because I had to learn quickly.

My third short was vastly better. It really told a story without words. I shot a few more like that later, including four on 16mm film.

These were all supposed to be 5 minutes. I think short three was 16 minutes.

My fourth and fifth student-film shorts actually had heavy dialogue, but I was still learning very fast and challenging myself to do something different.

I scripted the fourth short without dialogue. It was about a dying cartoonist, and was intended as a very personal, serious drama. Writing it without dialogue forced me to come up with visual ideas to keep it interesting. I then rewrote it with dialogue but kept most of those ideas. I’d already been writing serious screenplays for awhile but this was my first serious film- a big step for a goofy kid like me! It was 18 minutes long.

As I recall, I got in trouble for using dialogue so heavily, and my grade was taken down a few notches. That happened a lot at USC, always on the films I was most proud of!

My fifth was an animated adaptation of the Terry Pratchett novel, MORT. It was crazy over-ambitious for a five-minute short at the end of the semester. I’d written a 45-minute script, and I had to shoot it in a weekend and edit it in about as long. I got my friends together and we recorded the voices in one long night. I played Death and I certainly sounded like Death by that point. For the animation I made some clay figures with drawn cutout faces, in real-world locations. It was nothing fancy, but I really did shoot it in a weekend, and made it work in the edit as best I could. I was new to Avid and digital editing generally. I released a 25-minute animated film, having cut out anything I didn’t absolutely need to tell the story.

I was proud. I’m sure I got in trouble for it! I wasn’t alone either- Someone else in the class had shot a dialogue-heavy adaptation of The Catcher In the Rye.

In another class, when shooting on 16mm film, the films really did have to be 5 minutes long, and not a second longer. We only got one or two takes because film stock was limited, and you really had to tell the story visually.

Due to shenanigans I was forced to take the class twice, and did better work the second time. With a partner I shot a fantasy film The Journey of Truesong (with thrift-store costumes), and a time-travel musical with CGI and splitscreen effects, all done in-camera. We also got in trouble for both, because both involved dialogue and were against the rules. We’d made the most exciting films in the class, and got punished for it. That sort of thing happened a lot.

I remember on The Journey of Truesong, our actress was vegan, and I didn’t know. I’d brought ham sandwiches for lunch. She was too polite to say anything and starved the whole shoot. When we opened up the fruit (and I think trail mix) her eyes went wide and she chowed down. Ask your actors about food restrictions and make sure you have a way to feed them! We were in Griffith Park, miles from anywhere!

A few years later I filmed a scene for She-Hulk, again in Griffith Park, with four actors. They were supposed to barbecue hamburgers in the scene itself, so I bought a grill and figured that would be our meal for the day as well. I wanted to wrap an actor playing a bad guy so he could go home, so we shot his scenes first. The sun was going down by the time we grilled the hamburgers. The scene was grainy since we were losing the light, and getting the grill running was taking time. The actors had to get a little silly and improv around it, and I reshot some of it later in a different location (obviously so). By that point the hamburgers and other food had been sitting out in the sun for hours and were absolutely inedible. Everyone was starving!

Today you could maybe use a food delivery app. Maybe not, because we were still in the park in a very remote location. It was a disaster of planning on my part, and I think an actor quit after that. When you have no budget, going out on location means going out on a limb and hoping it works. In this case I wasn’t able to feed my cast. The actresses rolled with it and forgave me. An actor didn’t.

Food is very important, and easy to overlook! If you’re shooting in your own home, or a very controllable location, you can keep food in the fridge. On location in the park, in the heat, the food had a very limited shelf life, and so did the actors.

If we weren’t out in the middle of nowhere, we might all drive to a fast food restaurant to eat. That can take up hours in the middle of a shoot if you’re not careful. Having enough food onset certainly helps.

I had very high standards for the sort of actors I’d cast. In high school I was just casting friends, but I grew out of that. Even so, I think that someone who will really stick with you and is willing to put in the work with you is just as important as raw talent. If someone can’t act, maybe they can run the camera, or hold the microphone, or just generally help out onset and with the production. They can drive around, get the food, set things up that need to be set up. They can be an extra, or a costumed character. There’s so much that needs to be done, and no-budget shoots immediately become a trashfire of problems because it’s hard to get it all done in time. Things will always go wrong, and you prove yourself by how you deal with all of that.

I know that got very personal, and very long.

But I hope that helps!

#long post

3 notes · View notes

spooky-muldy · 7 years

Text

Emoji Movie Script

Here it is, Spanish version and other languages coming soon:

The world we live in. It's so wondrous, mysterious, even magical. No. No, not that world. I meant this one. The smartphone. Each system and program and app is its own little planet of perfect technology, all providing services so necessary, so crucial, so unbelievably profound. Look who just sent me a text. Addie McAllister? Must be a mistake. Or a joke. Or a scam. Don't send her your Social Security number. Dude. She's right there. That's our user, Alex. And, like every freshman in high school, his whole life, everything, revolves around his phone. And, as the pace of life gets faster and faster... Phones down in five. And attention spans get shorter and shorter and... You're probably not even listening to me right now. Who has the time to type out actual words? And that's where we come in, the most important invention in the history of communication... Emojis. That's my home. Textopolis. Here, each of us does one thing, and we have to nail it every time. The Christmas Tree just has to stand there all festive. Merry Christmas. It's still September, Tim. The Princesses... I am so pretty. They just got to wear their crowns and keep their hair combed. You guys, we are so pretty. Devil, Poop, Thumbs Up. They just show up, and they're good to go. But for the faces, the pressure is on. Crier always has to cry, even if he's just won the lottery. Hooray! I'm a billionaire! The Laugher is always laughing, even if he's just broken his arm. I can see the bone! Now, me, I'm a Meh. So I got to be totally over it all the time, you know, like, "Meh, who cares?" Which is not as easy as it sounds. Morning, Mrs. D. I see you have the little minis with you. They're so cute. That is so adorable, I can't take it! Now I'll never get them to sleep. Stick to your one face, weirdo. No! No! It's hard to always act blase, when living in Textopolis is just so exciting. Hello, good simians. Those are some sharp attaches. Yes, well, we have business to attend to. What kind of business? Monkey business. I sounded British! Meh. That was really good. Meh. Meh. That was a great... -Whatcha doing there, mate? -Practicing. Today is my first day on the phone. Boy. I'm gonna be so meh. What are you gonna do? Me and the boys are gonna throw ourselves on the barbie! Here's my sauce now. G'day, mate. Hey. Konnichiwa. Sorry, emoticons! I hate knocking over the elderly. Here, let me help, let me help. My colon! Is that the time? Hey, my eyes are up here, pal. Yeah! All right! Right on time. So, last week, Alex sends me next to this guy. That kid! Where does he get this stuff? Why are you laughing, freak? Now, unlike me, my parents are total pros. Gene, please tell me you weren't laughing just now. In public. He was. I remember. Let's go somewhere more private. I have some bad news, Gene. And I'm afraid you'll have the wrong reaction. Okay. What's the wrong reaction? Anything other than "meh." Come on. I don't want to be late. I'm not letting you go to work today. Wait, what? You're just not ready, son. Come on! Working in the cube is an emoji's whole purpose in life. Everybody my age is working on the phone except for me. Sweetie, that's not true. Yeah! I'm gonna work on the phone, and I'm only 10. That's because I believe in you. Should we wash our hands? No, no, no. We're number two! We're number two! We're number two! See? I... I know I'm different, okay? But when I need to, I can be meh. I just... I want to be a working emoji, you know, like... Like everybody else, and then... Then I would finally fit in, you know? You fit in, honey. No, I don't, Mom. I never have. But I can change all that if you'd just let me. Just give me a chance. But what if you get sent out on the phone, making the wrong face? No, Dad, I'll make the right face. Look. Meh... You're so handsome when you make that face. I think he's ready, Mel. Meh. Come on, Dad. Let me prove it to you. If you really think you're ready. I am! Yes! Yes. I promise, I won't let you down. Stop. Congratulations, everyone! What an exciting day for all of you. It's really her. Pizza! Hey! Your first day on the job. Hi. Hi. Don't be nervous. I won't bite. Hi. I'm Smiler. Don't touch me. Hi! Okay. I mean, hey. As you know, I'm Smiler. I am the system supervisor here because I was the original emoji. Here's how it works. It's nothing fancy. Wait a minute. It's really fancy! You each have your own cube on the emoji bar. If Alex chooses you, should you be so lucky, your cube will light up. It's showtime. The scanner will scan you, and that scan will get sent right up to Alex's text box. And let me tell you, guys, there is nothing like getting scanned for the first time. You're gonna love it. Really. Now, over here is the favorites section where you'll find all the most popular emojis. And, of course, you'll find my cube here. You are smooth. Just doing my duty. What? What did I say? Rocket looking to party. Come on, tell me you aren't just a little bit tempted. Steven, for the last time, I don't want to buy a time-share. Come on, man, it's Hi-5. You know me, I'm a favorite. Alex hasn't picked you in weeks. And if he stops picking you, you're no longer a favorite. It's got to be some sort of mistake. I mean, look at me, I'm an attractive hand giving a high five. Fist Bump. Come on in. Hey. Fist Bump? He's a knucklehead. Literally. Look at him. I can look like that. Cramp. Huge mistake. Help. Help me. Help up the hand. There you go. Thanks, mate. Hey, little Meh, how about you create a distraction, and then I'll just slip under the rope? Is someone lost? Smiler, hi. Just leaving. Yeah, you know, just killing time before I go back to my cube in the far corner where Alex can't even see me anymore! You may not be a favorite anymore, but you will always have a place in the cube. Yeah, in the nosebleeds. I'm standing right here. Words hurt. The most important thing I can tell you is to just be yourself. Blah. I was made to be happy, so I am always smiling. Places, please. Emojis to your cubes. Attention. We've got incoming. Got to be meh. Got to be meh. My gosh, my own cube. I can't believe it. I could put a plant over here. And over here could go an inspirational calendar. Okay. Got to be meh. Got to be meh. Look at our son down there. I'm just beaming with pride. You don't think he'll actually get picked, do you? Hie-ro-gly-phics. Hieroglyphics was an ancient language of picture forms. Does that remind anyone of anything? Hello? A language of pictures. Anyone? Early hieroglyphs date back as far as 3,300... I got to reply to Addie's text. What should I write? Nothing. Words aren't cool. Okay. Be cool. Be cool. All right, Alex is not sure how he wants to play this. I would really love it to be me. Beam me up! Beam me up! I need Thumbs Up on standby. Yeah! Thumbs Up is going in! Wait! Alex is changing his mind. He's moving. Okay. Looks like it's gonna be Meh. I'm so nervous, I could almost shrug. We are go for Meh. Initiating scan. Okay. You can do this. I can't do this! I can't do it! What is this? Stop the scan! I can't! It's too late! Meh, meh, meh, meh. My goodness, I'm freaking out! What's he doing? He's making the wrong face! Good for him! Little... Wait, what? Be meh! Be meh! Be meh! Abort! Abort! Shut it down! Shut it down! What is that emoji? Wrong emoji sent! Evacuate the Meh cube! Evacuate the cube! I got to get out of here. Get that bozo out of there! I'm trying! No! My God. The humanity. Medic. Sorry, everybody. That was not what I meant to do. I kinda... I kinda panicked. Are you even a Meh at all? Course he is. He's my spitting image. If you have expressions other than meh, what you are is a malfunction. Malfunction? No! I can be meh. Just give me one more chance. That's not gonna happen. You know what would be really fun? A board meeting. Where we could figure out what to do with you! I knew there was something wrong with him. A malfunction? What's gonna happen to him? He can't work on the phone. What would Alex think? What do his parents think? I just wanted to be useful, you know? Fit in. Now everybody thinks I'm a malfunction. I am a malfunction. Even if you are a malfunction, Gene, your mom and dad still love ya. I knew you weren't ready. Let's get you out of here and take you home. One day, all this will blow over, and everyone will almost forget about what you did. Until then, you should probably stay locked up in the apartment. Wait. You want to hide me away? You're embarrassed of me. It's for your own safety. We're trying to protect you, son. Gene? Where are you going? I'm not gonna run away from this. I'm an emoji, and even though I'm not sure exactly which one, I've got to have some sort of purpose here. I know it. Gene, no. Sweetie, please. Boy. A malfunction... Order! Order! The motion is carried. So, how'd it go, Gavel? Hey, Light Bulb, tell me what's going on in there. What? Poop, what is it? Tell me, turd. Tell me true. What happened? I know it was an accident. We all have accidents. You're so soft, Poop. Not too soft, I hope. Gene! We were just gonna come looking for you. Why don't you come inside the boardroom, and we can have a teeny, weeny chat. Um, I came up here to defend myself, but you seem pretty happy. So, good news? Right. I'm always happy. Right. Hashtag truth. Well, the only thing that could ever make me unhappy is if one of our emoji team made a mistake, which caused Alex to lose faith in the phone. And then our whole world gets wiped out. Smiler, I double-pinky-swear promise to you that I will never, ever make a mistake in the cube again. We know you won't, Gene. We know you won't. You know, the first time you said it, it sounded genuine, but then you repeated it, and then, that was weird. That's because we're setting you up with our best Anti-Virus Bots. So, they'll like... They'll just... They're gonna fix me? Actually, delete you. But yes! If you get deleted, you don't have to worry about what your purpose is or the future or why you're such a malfunction. 'Cause you're deleted, right? All right, good talk. Bots! No! Don't let him escape! Party time! Wait a minute... The air is better here. Beer, Tea. I'm Coffee! Sorry. Sheesh. So edgy. My old cube. Take a hike, Mike. -My name's not Mike. -What? There's AV Bots coming! For me? Just because I'm in the wrong section? Holy deleto! What do we do? Quick! This way! Let's go. Don't tell anyone you're about to see this. They'll never find us down here. Where are we? The basement? No. Welcome to the Loser Lounge, where the emojis who never get used hang out. Go fish, Fish Cake With Swirl. Sweep so you won't cry. Sweep so you won't cry. Sweep so you won't cry. I almost got deleted. Me, Hi-5. Hey. What's up, Hi-5? They weren't trying to delete you. They were trying to delete me. You? What's so important about you they'd send out an entire team of Bots? They say I'm a malfunction. You bringing malfunctions in here now, Hi-5? For crying out loud, Abandoned Luggage, that had better not be my leftover Chinese food. What Chinese food? Do you have any idea what it's like to be living large, hashtag blessed, the favorite of the favorites, and then demoted to this pit of despair? Here, will you hit my calluses for me? At least you're a working emoji. That's all I ever wanted. Well, if that's all it'll take for you to be satisfied, then just find a hacker and get reprogrammed. It's not that complicated. Where would I find a hacker? In the Piracy app. Duh. Who took my clear nail polish? Piracy app? To get there, I mean, I'd have to leave Textopolis. So? I've done it. Would you be a brother? One of the Princess emojis left the phone altogether. Now she lives on the cloud. That is good. I'm sure the hacker that helped her do that could easily reprogram you. The name's Jailbreak. Jailbreak? That's great! Reprogrammed. I just need to be reprogrammed, and then, I can finally be the Meh I was meh to be. Help me find that hacker, Hi-5. Will you? Please? Maybe this hacker could help you, too. Like rewrite some code, get you into the favorites section. Wait a minute. I've been trying to use my charisma and sense of entitlement to get me back on top, but all I need is a hacker. Today's your lucky day. Let's roll. Hey, can I come, too? Talk to the hand, Red Wagon. I thought I was. Bye, Felicia. Ciao, Fish Cake with Swirl. Daddy's heading back to the VIPs where he belongs! Wait. What about the Bots? Good point. Good point. Ouch! Hey. I shouldn't have picked the cactus. I just... I shouldn't have picked it. You didn't even try to get the tree. It's baffling. Let's go. Hi-5? Hello? Hi-5? Where are you? I'm right here! Gene! Here we are, end of the text app. No way. Come on, Gene. It's perfectly safe. Gene, help me! The wallpaper monster's got me! No! Hold on, hold on! Hi-5! No. This is all my fault! I'm so sorry, Hi-5! I'm... I'm just messing with you. It's one of those rubber finger-monster puppets from the '80s. I collected the whole set. All right, you coming? What do I do? What do you mean? Just take a step through the other side. This is it. The next time I come back here, I'll be a real Meh. Hi-5? No! Are you finished? Where are we? Welcome to the Wallpaper. This place is incredible. Each app is its own unique world. That's my face. You're on my... Thank you. What is this place? WeChat. It's like a whole other world. It is. What are they? They're Bubble Pups. They might be cute, but, man, are they clingy. Whee! They're stickers, Gene. Try to get with the program. This is so cool. Wait. What's in that one? -Guys, look at this picture. -Look at my baby. This is what I ate for breakfast. -This is what I ate for lunch! -Here's me on a hike! Here's me in the gym! Here's me in the bathroom! Everybody's talking about themselves. How does he know so many people? None of these people know him, but they like him, and that's what matters in this life, popularity. I... I think I'd... I think I'd rather just have a real friend. A real friend? How's that gonna get you anywhere? What you need are fans. They give you complete and unrelenting support. As long as you're on top. Poor Gene. I blame myself. I blame you, too. I just wanted to be supportive. You just wanted a vacation. You take that back, Mel Meh. Bots. If they haven't found Gene by now, he must have skipped town. You mean the Wallpaper? Our boy's on the run. How about we find him ourselves? Yeah, for sure. Tell all Bots to follow those Mehs. I'm sure they'll know all the freaky-deaky apps Gene will hide out in. I'm really good at making plans, you guys. Right? Here we are. The Piracy app. This is where we'll find Jailbreak. Um... But this is the Dictionary. That's just what Alex wants his parents to think. This is called a skin. Really? What could a teenage boy possibly want to hide from his parents? Just try to keep up. This place can get a little rough. Ahoy, mateys. Look who's back! Hi-5! I'm a bit of a celebrity here. Always welcome.! Loser! Come on. Follow me. Great. Emojis. I thought the conversation just got dumber. Internet trolls. Just ignore them. Eventually, they'll get a job or a girlfriend or some sort of purpose in life, and they'll stop. Virus. We'll just... We'll just walk over this way. Hi! It's so great to see you again. Do I know you? It's Spam. Just sign here and I can get you special discounts on vitamins and credit card offers that can save you up to 25%. No, no, no, don't get sucked in. Back off, Spam! It's the only way to deal... Back off! Thank you very much! You can illegally download our CD right here. Hey, Trojan Horse. How are you? Yeah, what'll it be, hand? I'll have a bottle of "Hack Daniel's." Maybe with a plate of cheese and hackers? You trying to find a hacker? You can just ask, you know. Sorry. Um, yes. We're looking for a hacker named Jailbreak. I know a guy that can hook you up. Right over there. He looks capable. No, not him. Her. Wait. He's a she? Hey, Jailbreak. Mind if we join you? Yes. That's the thing about the Internet, isn't it? You can never tell if someone's being ironic or sincere. I sincerely, unironically want you to go away. That's a good one. So, here's the thing. My friend Gene here has a little problem. Well, see, I'm supposed to be a Meh, but I don't really feel... Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, that's good. And we thought you could help, since you got the Princess, you know, off the phone. Not interested. Hold up. That's not a Meh face. Bots! They're after me! How are you doing that? Look, it's just something I can do. Can you help us? Follow me. Bots! Delete my history! I corrupted the entire hard drive. I made the most delicious cinnamon buns. Maybe if there was something to, you know, jog my memory. Come on! Move! Hey, Trolls, why is that mailbox wearing a tuxedo? Hi! It's so great to see you again! Call me! This tunnel will get us out of here. Move! Did that cloud taste sweet to you?! Help me! Help! I'm stuck! Sweet motherboard! Where am I? Get me out of here. Hey, Palm Face. Try getting him out the top! Already on it! Hold tight, Gene. This feels very odd, and it smells. I mean, it smells good, it smells delicious, but I still don't like it. The game obviously thinks you're a candy, even though you're weirdly misshapen, you know? What are we gonna do? Stay very still. Don't worry. We've got your back. Right, Hi-5? Hey, Fingers! You want to focus? For your information, I happen to have a sugar addiction, and it's a very serious... Listen, Finger Head! We have to get Gene out of the game without blowing him up. I don't want to blow up. We have to match up the candies, so that Gene will drop to the bottom. And we can't match him with any yellows, or else... Don't do that. Please don't do that. Watch. Match three in a row. Don't blow Gene up. Got it. And we have to be very careful. -Yeah, yeah, yeah. Careful. -Candy! Watch it! Hey! No! No, no, no! Slow down. Not the yellows! Not the yellows. I said careful! My mom just joined Facebook. Can you believe she wanted to friend me? Hey, Addie, I was just wondering if you are... Tasty. What? Um... Excuse me? Sweet. Hey, Addie! Hi, Nikki. See you later, Alex. Sugar Crush. So over this. Wireless Wireless. How may I help you? I'd like to make an appointment. It's like this phone is playing games with me. Hey, what does this do? No! Get me out of here! No! Stop it! Stop, stop! It's not working. Well, there's one option left. We line you up with the yellows. But you said not to do that. Special candies get transported to that jar. The game might think you're a special candy. And what if it doesn't think I'm a special candy? Well... Jailbreak, hello? Hello, Jailbreak? Sorry. What if it doesn't think I'm a special candy? I'm not too worried about it. Okay, just do it. Gene! Gene? Hey. No! Gene! You're alive! You were trying to see if I had somehow turned into candy, weren't you? Yes, I was. And you have not. Hey. Looks like something popped up on Alex's calendar. I'm sure it's nothing. Alex made an appointment at the phone store. No! Calm down, everyone! Calm down. Don't worry. Everything is fine. Maybe Alex just wants to buy some accessories. His appointment is with technical support. Well, I'm sure we still have plenty of time to figure this out. His appointment is for tomorrow. Then maybe it's just for some routine maintenance. Actually, it's to erase the phone. Listen, Gene, I'm about to become your knight in shining armor. You are? Yeah. But first, we need to get uploaded to the cloud. That's where we'll find the source code to reprogram you. The cloud? Isn't that off the phone? Ding, ding, ding, ding. You got it. Yeah, the cloud. Off the phone. We're in Candy Crush, obvs. I know a shortcut to Just Dance, which is right next to Dropbox, where we can get uploaded to the cloud. Of course. Just Dance, then boogie over to Dropbox, catch the link, and zoom. Hold up. Here's the stinker. Before they let us into the cloud, we have to get past this firewall. The firewall uses face identification. Yeah, the firewall. Which is really annoying, because I've already tried to get through. Guessed wrong once, and now I'm locked out for life. Locked out for life? You're thinking, 'cause I can make different faces, the firewall will think I'm different emojis. Yeah. I wanted to say it 'cause it was my idea. You know, women are always coming up with stuff that men are taking credit for. You know what... Well, then let's hit the road. Hi-5, you coming? I'm coming! Why do I always think I'm gonna come around on black licorice? My precious. Hey! Move it! Certain death, here we come. Let's try this one. YouTube? What a visual treat. And I don't even need a remote. That guy is so expressive. He reminds me of Gene. Yeah. Something really wrong with him. Our son is a malfunction, and you should never have let him go into that cube. Don't blame me for this, Mel. I am hopping mad at you. See? Mary, I think we're being followed. But don't overreact. I told you not to overreact. What are you doing now? They'll be in there for hours. Mary, where are you going? I think we should go our separate ways, Mel. I thought I knew the Meh that I married, but maybe I don't. But, Mary... This tunnel will help us avoid the Bots. Thanks for helping us. It's really nice of you. NBD, dude. The truth is, you're helping me. Come on, let's move it. Why so slow? Hi-5, stop. Why are you getting so close? What's with you? Back off. Can't stop now. I'm having a sugar rush! I'll go around you. If I stop moving, my heart's gonna explode! Coming through, Jailbreak! Look out! Hey! Watch it, Knuckle Butt! I can't feel my face. So, Jailbreak, back there you said I'm helping you. I've been trying to get past that firewall for months. Come on, come on! The faster we get there, the faster I become a favorite! Look at me! I just want to bounce out of here, get off the phone, and live on the cloud. What just happened? You don't like it here? There's so many rules here. What is up with that? The cloud is supposed to be amazing. There's so much to see and do. Sugar crash. I can't hold on anymore. Catch me, Gene. Catch me! And you can be whoever you want. Thanks. You're free! Come on! My gosh, my hands are sweating. You are a hand! Yeah! You know, come to think of it, I don't really remember there ever being a hacker emoji. Um, you know, you're taking up too much of my brain space. Let's keep the chitchat to a minimum. Someone likes you. What are you talking about? This is just like when Peace Sign gave me just one finger. I knew she was in love with me. Let's go! I'm never eating another piece of candy ever again. Hi-5, don't do it. Don't you do it. It's already been in there once. Don't do it. Are my fingers getting fat? I'll tell you what, this bandage wasn't so tight before. Okay. We get through this app, and Dropbox is right on the other side. We just need to keep it super DL in here. And no matter what, we can't turn it on. OMG, this turned it on! What? I'm a hand. It's a big, red button. What's happening? No, no, no, no, no! Welcome to Just Dance! Follow my moves and you get to move forward. Do the wrong moves and you get an "X." Three strikes and you're out. Out? What does she mean by "Out"? Digital death. Thanks to you, Fingers. Now we're gonna have to dance our way out. Which is all right with me, 'cause I can shake it like Michael. Or Michael's glove, anyway. Are you ready to dance? This is bad, Gene. I can't dance. I got no groove. Come on. Everybody can dance. Not me, okay? I'm really stiff. See? I can't... Don't understand. Okay. No, no... Stop, stop. She has to stop. I see now what you are saying. Just follow her moves. Ready to dance in three... This I can't do. Two... Dude... Just shut up and... Dance! It's too easy! Hee-hee! Shamone! Jailbreak! I got you. Look. Just feel the music. Express yourself. Through dance? Yeah, you got it! Go, girl! Now throw some sauce on that dance burrito. I'm doing it! I'm fully nailing this dance! You got it! Great job! You're moving on to free dance! Impress us with your moves to move forward. More dancing? You're killing it, Gene! Slay! Nice! Shake it, Gene. You won't break it. Wait a minute! I've never seen that dance before. What's it called? Um... The Emoji Pop? I love it! What? You do? Everybody, do the Emoji Pop! Hoo! Yes! Princess. You're the Princess emoji? You never got off the phone. Welcome, new players! What? Who? No! We got to go. Don't worry. They're robots. They can't dance. Downloading funk protocol. "Can't dance," he says. Move! Congratulations. You're a disco diva. Hey, Alex, you gonna dance for us? Alex, that's extra homework for you. Hey, Alex, you gonna shake it? No! No, no, no, no, no, no! Alex must be deleting the app. Watch out! We got to get out of here. Come on! This song is my jam. Hi-5, come on! Let's go! Hurry! Hi-5! Gene! I got you! Gene... Hi-5! Gene. Hey, wait. Where's Hi-5? Alex trashed the app. And Hi-5 right along with it. Wait, what? Wait, trashed? Hi-5 is in the trash? He wanted to dance. But I knew it was a bad idea. We got to get him out of there. Gene, Dropbox is right here. That's our ticket to the cloud. And the trash is on the other side of the phone. We don't know how many other Bots are out there. I'm sorry. No way. We can't go without Hi-5. I don't care how far away it is. That's my friend down there. I'm not just gonna leave him to get deleted. What? What is it? I've always just thought you got to look out for number one. Well, what good is it to be number one if there aren't any other numbers? Okay. I'm sorry. This is my malfunction. I just... I can't be meh about anything. This is why I'm going to get reprogrammed. Well, it's actually kind of cool. Wait, really? You know, I think I know a shortcut. We can take the music streams in Spotify. Let's go give that big hand a hand. Come on. Alex trashed the Just Dance app, and our Bots are offline, and it's giving me a real headache. I am so angry. I really need to stay happy. Can we please lighten the mood? No one can resist una fiesta! Not that happy. We've only got four hours before Alex's phone appointment. If they find a malfunction on the phone, we are all gonna be wiped. Yeah. She said, "Wiped." Aim higher, Steven. I didn't want to have to do this, but it is fun to press buttons. The illegal upgrade. Now that makes me happy. I just want to dance. Dance, please. Arr! Quiet, you sassy gypsy. Where am I? Hi! It's so great to see you again! You're in the trash, Fingers for Brains. Get away from me, Troll. Hi! It's so great to see you again! I got to get out of here. You can't. And at the end of the day, the trash gets emptied, and we're all gonna die! No. No, no! This is the last face you will ever see. No! This is Spotify? Yep. Every one of those streams is a different song. Is it safe? Yeah! Are you sure this is a good idea? Fastest way to the trash, dude! Could we at least pick a calmer stream? Okay, buzzkill. Alex. A bunch of people are hitting the promenade. I think Addie might be there, too. That's perfect! I have an appointment down there, anyway. I've got to get this phone fixed. Hey, bubble butt. Yeah, you do. Much better. So, I got to ask. Is it true that when a princess whistles, birds fly down from the skies, and... Hello, stereotype. That is a complete and total myth. I'm sorry. Did you realize that on the first emoji set, a woman can either be a princess or a bride? That's why I need to get to the cloud, where you can be whoever you want to be. Get ready. Whale song coming. -Wait, wait. Whale what? -A whale song. From Alex's biology presentation. You're not gonna see that sitting around in a cube. It's funny. You want out of the cube, and I want in. Gene, if that means you can't be yourself, what's the point? You know, I think you're pretty cool just the way you are. We're gonna need this. In the trash? Me? I used to be somebody. Here I am. Look. In an old e-mail Alex never sent. "Addie, blah, blah, blah, blah, bla-la-la-la." And then there's me, Hi-5, right there, doing my job. FYI, nobody cares about you. Just leave me, Troll, and let me die in this dump alone. Let me look for the world's smallest violin in here, so you can play it. It's the Hand Angel of Mercy. She's finally come for me. Give me your hand! I mean, give me yourself. Take my hand, angel. I'm ready to take my place amongst the other great hands of the past. It's me, Gene! Gene? I got him! Take me with you. Hi-5! Let go of me. Don't leave me down here! You were wrong, Troll. People do care about me. And I'm not upset, Troll. Do you see how not upset I am? Gene, you came back for me. You saved me. It wasn't just me. Jailbreak helped, too. And she's a hugger. Give her a squeeze. No, no, no. There really is nothing greater than the feeling of being truly free. You filthy trolls, I inhaled your stench, but I was once one of you, so I, too, feel your pain. Now go. Be free! Should be smooth sailing from here. Gene. Gene. Gene? Are you Instagramming? Where is my Gene? Mary. You've really done it this time. No, you haven't. Mel? What are you doing in Alex's trip to France album? I was looking for you. None of this is your fault, Mary. It's mine. What do you mean? Is that a tear on your cheek? It's my fault Gene is the way he is. I have other expressions, too. I think they've just been buried away. But with Gene going missing and thinking I might have lost you, too... Mel. Why didn't you tell me? I didn't know myself. Right now, I'm so overwhelmed with passionate feelings for you. Mary, my love for you burns with the intensity of a red-hot flame. I like that, Mel. Let's go find our son. Together. We'll always have Paris, Mary. So, you're a princess. I saw your little tiara. Very fancy. Is it true when a princess whistles, birds fly down from... That's what I said! No, guys! That's a stupid myth! What software version are we living in? Go read an e-book. Educate yourselves. Just look behind you. What the... What is that? Smiler must have upgraded her Bots. Let's get out of here before it... Hi, Gene. Remember me? Smiler. I'm coming to you live from the amphitheater. Why don't you come back to Textopolis and we can talk through our differences, okay? My friend here will escort you, all right? I'm gonna see you soon, buddy. Bye, now. We're actually gonna delete him in front of everyone. Psst! It's still on! It's still what? Jiminy Sassafras! Move! Separate! Tangle him up! Jailbreak! Gene! This way! It's still after me! Let's go. We have to make it to Dropbox. Yes! No! Go low! Don't worry. It can't get in. It's illegal malware, and this app is secure. Come on. Welcome to Dropbox. You are about to leave the phone. Remain seated, please. You might want to hang on. Why do they call this Dropbox, anyway? This is why! I see that now! Yeah! I think we're about to see that candy corn again! We made it. Hoo! Guys, guys, chill. We still have to get past that. Holy... Yeah. Hello. Welcome to the firewall. How may I help you? All right, here goes. What do I do? Sit in the corner and don't say a word. Keep those sausage fingers to yourself. Yes, Your Majesty Princess of Nightmares! Now, Gene, step onto the password icon, and I'll feed you the passwords. Okay. Okay. 10-11-2002. 10-11-2002. Access denied. Okay, try a different expression. Is it gonna blast me every time I mess up? Yeah, kinda. What do you mean, "Kinda"? Ready? Welcome to the firewall. His favorite food. Chimichangas. Chimichangas? Access denied. This might take a while. Boy. Krav Maga. Krav Maga. Major Lazer. Major Lazer. Abuela Dora! Skate or die. Access denied. Denied. I don't get it. We've tried all the important things in Alex's life. His favorite pet, sport, his favorite grandma. I'm sorry, Gene. I let us all down. You know, if I had to come up with a password, I'd probably use the name of a girl I liked. I've been all over the phone. He's never mentioned a girl. Yes, he has. Hi. When I was in the trash, I read a very interesting e-mail, but I'm just the dunce in the corner, forbidden to speak. What e-mail? Sorry, what? What e-mail? To a girl at school. He was declaring his feelings of love for her. I guess instead of sending it, he tossed it in the trash. Hi-5, this is very important. What is her name? Her name, yes. Excellent question. It was Tina. Karen. Marge. Lindsey. Alison. Sarah or Lupita. I want to say Lupita, but that doesn't feel right now I'm saying it out loud. Jennifer. Got to find that e-mail. Phillipa. I think I can access the trash. Annabelle. -I got it! Addie! -Yes! Yes! That's it! Addie! I knew I'd get there. "Dear Addie, you and I, we're like diamonds in the sky. "You're a shooting star I see, "a vision of ecstasy. "Shine bright like a diamond." And he used a high five, see? I guess now we know why he trashed it. Shade. Guys, should we try this? Addie. Access granted. Snap. This place is amazing. The cloud. I can't believe it. One little emoji could sure get lost in a place like this. I guess we should make you a Meh before that Bot comes back? So, we're gonna... We're gonna do that now? We had a deal. Right? Yeah, okay. Right. I, guess I'll start hacking. We did it, Gene. All our dreams are coming true. I'll be an Alex favorite again, and you'll be a real Meh. Yeah! Yeah, but this all seems kind of super-fast now, though. Doesn't it? Hi-5, I just didn't expect to be having these feelings right now. Well, maybe you should go and express them while you still can. So, I've been... I mean, um... Ever since we... Jailbreak, you're the coolest, most interesting emoji I've ever met. And after all the adventures that we had, I'm just not sure I want all that to go away, because my feelings right now are, like, huge. I just think that they could be enough for me to want to stay the way I am. If it means I could stay here with you. Like, forever. Forever and ever and ever. Maybe longer than that even. Like in the fairy tales. Like, what is "? Is that a good "? Gene, if this is about you deciding not to be meh, then I am all about that. I like you just the way you are. But I had a plan. Right. I'm not just some princess, Gene, waiting for my prince. I mean, what you said was beautiful, but... Gene. You're all meh. The source code worked! Turns out I didn't need it. For the first time in my life, meh is all I feel. No! Gene! Hi. I have an appointment. I'm a little early. No problem. I can take you right now. Jailbreak! Don't do that! That freaky huge Bot has got Gene back inside the phone. What? He left looking more meh than the meh-est meh face I've ever seen. What did you say to him? It's what I didn't say. We've got to go get him. How are we gonna get in there in time before he gets deleted? I can't believe I'm doing this. You tell anyone you saw this, and I'll crack more than those knuckles. Birds do love princesses! It's not a myth. It's not a myth at all! What happened to becoming a favorite? Guess I'd rather have one real friend. And let's go get him. I can't wait to see the look on Gene's face! Look at that expression. Is that for realizing you've put all of Textopolis at risk, causing Alex to question our reliability? Hey, that's going too far, even for me. If we can delete this malfunction before his appointment, they'll discover there's nothing wrong with the phone. Any last words? Meh. Well, it's too late for that. Delete him! Wait. You delete Gene, you'll have to delete me, too. I have the same malfunction Gene does. Dad? Gosh, I don't know what to do. Yes, I do. Bot! No! Sorry, Mrs. Meh. I did not see that one coming. Smiler, I think you might be making too much stink out of all this. Really? How about you're next? I was wrong, Gene. I should've believed in you all along. What a touching daddy-son reunion moment. It reminds me of the time I deleted you both. Wait. That's this time! Delete the two malfunctions! No. How's that for an... Great. I can't reach! No! What did you do to my beautiful... My tooth. Hand, button. Jailbreak? Gene. You really are a Meh. What happened to looking out for number one? Being number one doesn't matter if there aren't any other numbers. Alex's appointment! He's deleting the phone! No, no, no! Show me Alex. Are you sure you want to delete everything? Do it. Red alert! Red alert! Alex, no! Game over. Fellas, I'm afraid this is last call. Dude, Addie's here. You should go over. Every time I try, I screw it up. I don't know how to tell her how I feel. If we help Alex connect to Addie, maybe he won't delete us. I might be able to bypass the wipe and get a text through to him. But we'll only have time to send one. Maybe I should go. He has love in his eyes. Send me. Alex looks nervous, too. He's more shy than nervous. Stop! It's Gene. He's all of those things. An emoji should only be one thing. Really? The Princess! Linda! Not now, Mom! Gene, you got this. That's not me anymore. But I have to try. It's starting! No, it's ending! I'm working on it. Mom? Dad? No. I'm in. Last time I was in this cube, I screwed everything up. Gene, why do you think I came back? It's because of you. Me? It's all inside of you, Gene. Just try to bring it back. And do you. Hi-5! I don't want to wave good-bye. It's now or never, Gene. Jailbreak, now! Check out this emoji. No way. Hey, I got your text. That's one super-cool emoji. I know, right? A lot of feelings in one. I get it. I like that you're one of those guys who can actually express his feelings. Yeah. That's me. So, do you think you'd want to... Yes. I'd love to go to the dance with you. Hey, excuse me. We made it! I could've lost you, Peter Pinkie. Or you, Reggie Ring Finger. Even you, Tiberius Thumb. Change your mind? Yeah, maybe it's weird, but... I'm gonna hold on to it. Gene, you did it! You saved us all! Mel. Gene! Gene! Gene! Gene! Gene! Gene. Gene. Gene. Gene! Gene! Gene! Gene! Gene! Gene! Gene! Gene! Gene! Gene! They love us! And Hi-5! And Hi-5! And Hi-5! And Hi-5! They love both of us! Hey, what up, Gene? Slap me some skin. And a little porridge for the pinkie. Hey, Hi-5, save me a dance for later. As long as you're not all hands again. Back on top of the hand pile. You're not on the list. -Wait, what? -What's going on? From now on, everyone is welcome! Wait, what is all this? It's for you, Gene. Everybody, the Emoji Pop! This is jazzy. Yeah. Go, Eggplant! Go, Eggplant! Go, Eggplant! We are out of Alex's pocket, emojis. This is not a butt dial. To your cubes. -Are we up and running? -Roger that. Good, 'cause we got incoming. Looks like it's gonna be Gene. Hey, Gene, ready to try out your new cube? In three, two... Read more: https://www.springfieldspringfield.co.uk/movie_script.php?movie=the-emoji-movie

#emoji movie #emoji movie script #movie #movie script #script

1 note · View note