#i'm lucky the couch is dark fabric bc i would have been so busted if there were neon orange stains

[hollowboobtheory]

i want all teens following me to know that if you have a good relationship with your parents, there will come a time that you fess up to the really stupid shit you’re doing right now, and it’s actually really fun to watch their faces as you admit to that time that they were out for the weekend and you blacked out on grandpa’s special gin and nearly died bc like. what are they gonna do? they can’t punish you. this was years ago the statute of limitations has long expired. they just have to sit there and accept the fact that you were a massive fucking dipshit right under their noses and got away with it.