#idk its therapeutic and i smell so clean

[care666bear]

When are you gonna come fold my laundry though??

Payment in orgasms

Any day! I honestly love everything about doing laundry, to the point I do the ladies laundry I rent from because she hates it lool she pays me in homemade apple pie tho, not orgasms. I could argue apple pie is better but it's about lunchtime so I'm probably hungry and lying

[foxydodo]

do you have any older Stan headcanons?

Hey! You and another anon asked the same so here you guys go :’D Gay or Bi-Probably in denial for a long time and very confused bc he is often so emotional, it’s hard to differentiate between romantic and platonic feelings.

-There’s the interview where Trey Parker says Stan is the most likely to be gay out of the main 4. (Tho personally idk if he was just kidding bc of the way it was worded? Don’t know and don’t care :p )

Angsty, seemingly aloof or even arrogant to strangers but is just a really tired sweetheart.-Will attempt to break free but eventually crumble in your arms if you hug him. This boy is starved of physical affection :c

-Probably falls asleep on bus/car rides with their music blasting and you wonder why they even put on earphones.

-Pretends to apologize if they fall asleep on their friend’s shoulder but secretly wishes they can just stay that way longer. *coughkylecough*

-Sleeps with many pillows or a weighted blanket. Sometimes brings an extra jacket to hug to sleep.-Spaces out pretty easily. Hands in pockets a lot. Looks down at his feet while walking.-Cries a lot be it happy or sad. -Appreciates scenery and can get overwhelmed with feelings over certain lighting or scents.

Pescatarian or part-time vegetarian-He’ll still eat some meat on occasions or for half a week bc of dietary needs. Doesn’t go full on vegetarian bc he’s very conscious of what others might say.

Drinks black coffee-Simply bc he enjoys it and thinks it’s a cool thing to be seen doing. -Also lives on carbonated sports drinks and not water. Gross.

Kind of messy and still hoards things.-He has a lot of emotional attachments to inanimate objects bc of its sentimental value. He’ll refuse to throw out things like old clothing, receipts, broken items etc.

-Has a lot of things yet when it comes to essentials, he seems to lack in them. Such as a working pen for class. (One of my fav style hc: Kyle usually lends Stan his pens and they all end up in Stan’s bag or pockets. Stan has about 6 of his pens now and is still borrowing more. Kyle is obviously annoyed by this and starts clearing Stan’s bag lmao)

While we’re on belongings, his shirts mildly smell of alcohol (and maybe even puke).-This one breaks my heart whenever I think about it but I have yet another Style hc: Kyle gifts Stan t-shirts from his favourite bands. Stan appreciates them a lot and doesn’t drink as much whenever he wears those. They are fresher and clean, and are stored properly as compared to what he normally throws on the floor. They both don’t notice this but feel more positive which continues the happy cycle!

Exercises and trains excessively / Jock Stan-He’s a long distance jogger and he pushes himself to the point of asthmatic episodes sometimes. Ironically, that helps him feel alive and know that he does actually want to live despite his nihilistic views.

-He’s passionate about football like on the show so it’s something he strives to be the very best at. Gets a scholarship for it.

-Obviously popular bc of how good he plays and enjoys the attention but it actually makes him feel even more lonely. He can pretend to get along with people easily but not many gets to really know him. Also fearful of investing too much into relationships/friendships.  

Alternatively, musician Stan-I hardly see this but Stan might turn to playing music as an outlet for all his emotions. Also seeing how musically inclined Randy and Shelly are, I feel like there’s a possibility that Stan might be too. He’s also been shown to play various instruments or sing on the show.

-Kenny and him actually bonds over writing music together. Their songs ranges from melancholic lyrics that make you wanna listen to during rainy weather to singing about titties and getting drunk lol. They also write very pretty songs about death.-Loves music and appreciates a wide genre. Really likes rock music from 80s to early 2000 and alternative indie rock.-Pretty particular with the earphones and speakers he gets. Will tune stereo, bass and amplifier settings on his own. Speaking of which, I think he’s very into DIY and crafts bc it’s therapeutic to just sit down and create little trinkets from individual parts. This trait he follows his dad.

Still a huge animal lover.-Will probably make DIY pet shelters during winter to place around the neighborhood. Or all year since they live in Colorado.

-Wants to and attempts to adopt so many strays.

-BABY TALKS TO ALL ANIMALS AND HAS CUTE NICKNAMES FOR ALL OF THEM. “No Mrs.Poofytail, this medicine is good for you. You’re not getting the (homemade) salmon cookie unless you stay still and let me dress your wound.”

-Will punch you if you disrespect animals.

-Kinda cute if he starts his own store making animal treats/meals.

-Cries at baby animals. You’ll wonder what he’s browsing bc he is looking so intently at the screen and suddenly he bursts out “AWWWWHHH”. You also gotta imagine him being buff and in his letterman jacket while doing this.LOVES PUNS AND MEMES AND VINES-He’s such a dork! It’s one of the few things that makes him laugh easily. He especially loves puns. It’s kinda canon in TFBW where he tries to explain all his jokes to you in case you don’t get them.

-Is the kind of person that will jokingly ask you out at the supermarket while holding a broccoli that has a $0.99 sticker tag bc that’s his sense of humor.I think they’re all pretty established by the fandom tho! Anyway, thank you for your asks! :3