#idk what happened to the sound but my computer is struggling so. im not uploading this again

[cringesnail]

Etoiles upholding the french tradition of doing illegal things without anyone noticing

[smallestclowninthecircus]

Tma season 2 notes baybeee

I made myself take several breaks so I could give my frie d who is listening to it at the same time as me a chance to catch up. Honestly just posting them so I have them saved somewhere but whatever.

ep 41: real graham wrote keep watching before he was replaced. Jon feels like he's being watched. But they werent replaced by things related to the eye. It's the web that's on the box that replaces them. Endless hallways and doors to nowhere. I bet nicholas will have ideas what entity this relates to. If it even does. They're like the tunnels in the one with the builder guy. Tunnels closing in etc. Also like the cave diving one. He's assuming it's just one

ep 42: so 100 gecs? (IM SORRY I LIKE 100 GECS BUT LMAO) so there's some entity related to music right? There's the piper episode and the 27 w/ the calliope. Ah yes, this season is gonna be the season of Paranoid!Jon

ep 43: section 31? fucking books. god no. smashed lights? cult lady did that. covered the lights too. she mentioned a spooky clown doll. thats not random.

ep 44: is this that same circus that got mentioned before? it is! the pipe organ! pop off organ! pipe off! mouth on the stomach! yes! mouths in unusual places my beloved!

ep 45: antiques! like that one ep!

ep 46: every time books get mentioned i sigh. hhh sus smells. it got brighter. I get the vibes occasionally that the dark and the eye are sorta at odds with eachother. GRRR BARK BARK LEITNER. ayyy ex altiora. entity go brr. which entity do we thing it is? my guess is The Dark. The book buyer's name is Mike. He has scars? Electricity? The childhood friend of the guy who got it later on perhaps? The Vast? its formatted like an entity idk. This happened before the other one. He got trapped in the wood carving. a win for the web lol spiders go brr

ep 47: did i hear spiral? ITS THE NOT THING FROM THE EPISODE WITH NOT GRAHAM "it didnt move, it shifted" is like the exact same sentence as before. ay john's starting to remember. the laughing woah thats weird. is "michael" one of the entities? "you make it seem like theres a war" supports my theory that theres a struggle between a couple of the entities. I said i thought it was the eye and the dark i believe but im not sure. its whatever entity michael is vs the worms? what did nicholas say the worms were again? The Corruption? still dont know which one michael is tho.

Had to take a break after that episode. smth about the quality of michael's voice makes me feel like im gonna slip into one of those states where it feels like nothing is real, so i got a nice cold glass of water.

ep 48: jesus ok this one's kidna corny. you're telling me love made the crowd go away come on now. Ur losing it big J. also shouldnt it be more sus that "sasha" is so unaffected by the worm incident/ finding of gertrude's body

ep 49: haven't we heard hector's name before? oh is he the crime guy? fucking jared... so it's a throat? chompa chompa. (it's just a little bit hot) the good part about these episodes is that we know whoever's telling the story isn't gonna die. even if it's a close call, they're not dead. hotworth? ok not jared keay. it bothers me how theres so many repeated names, can they not come up with other names? "sasha"'s computer is breaking... sus. Elias our favorite weed man! jon ur so paranoid lmao

ep 50: robert smirk, at it again. this is like that one episode with the old dude who locked his door. who said idle beforehand? was it smirk? fingertips. thats so weird lmao. bahahah tim

ep 51: simon fairchild. im sure jon will mention the name at the end i cant remember where we've heard it. this is just like the cavediving episode. a hand? there was a hand in the last one right? the scalpel! and an eye thing. she's trying to throw them off.

ep 52: thats the guy from before! with the hearts! god i hate this guy writing the statement hh. lights blowing, and brackish water. we know how this ends but its still tense. rainer? reigner? rain man. we've seen him before

ep 53: pls not a leitner. oh boy mans scratched out his eyes. rip skelly. why would gertrude have had this statement off the books? jon stabbed himself?? bruh im? big man are you okay

ep 54: cockney boys! ayy its our favorite delivery men. she cut out their eyes. she knew that the eye was a thing?

ep 55: oily residue like the retirement home!

ep 56: worms? no. spiders?? bruhh. aaah yelling :(( aww martin anyways yeah i called it about paranoid!jon he needs to take a nap and drink some hot chocolate and calm down for once please

ep 57: just remembered, i think theres an entity called The Lonely?? This feels pretty lonely idk. fairchild, lukas/ lucas, some spooky place in norway idk. "sasha" knew he was recordinig hmm suspicious cmon jon figure it out. Sasha and tom. hm sus. for records sake i feel liek i should note here that I did have it spoiled to me simply that that's not sasha, but thats really all. i assumed it was like the thing that happened to graham in S1

ep 58: i feel like i recognize the name eustice (?) wick. someone please tell me im not just watching jon's descent into madness over the course of this podcast. im hoping it isnt so but, (and pardon the dsmp reference) im getting real wilbur vibes from this one.

ep 59: oh dear ok account from the fielding house. swirling designs? Spiral time? oh boyy. oh wait! 6 inch hole in the middle! is it not a spiderweb type design on the table? thats what i had assumed but that description sounds more like a spiral thing. cobwebs is a Web thing. ayy nicholas was right! the box goes in the table! the place that she kissed him was burning. Raymond is an avatar of The Web and agnes is the burning one. Lightless Flame! Why did she save him? i guess she was against this guy eating ppl or wtvr but why was she at the halfway house then? I think she's like michael.

ep 60: the eye go brr

ep 61: breacon and hope once again. tom. sasha's boyfriend. vampires sleep in coffins. the guy just walking in seems similar to the mind control of the vampires

ep 62: bones! its that one leitner. is this mother keay? the mom of gerard? this is what happened to her right? her skin was found on hooks? oh yeah thats what i thought the pages are made of skin. yeesh. The End!! sounds like an entity. phrased like one, and i think i remember it. are the people trapped in the pages? or... kept?

ep 63: eaten by the darkness! cavediving episode! (just like eaten by the sky) did my brain make up one called The Vast? it feels like it should be one, and all these episodes have some similar description about their feelings when they do whatever chosen hobby they have. ok now this one kinda feels like the dark. lights going out and all that. ok so not really a The Vast thing, its more of a Dark thing. feckin smirk gah.

ep 64: dice! the death guy! the death game thing! the person tricked somebody else into becoming death and then they were immortal? but if the egyptians wanted to kill him or punish him or whatever couldnt they just kill him? it worked in the end when he had the person giving the statement stab him, that did the job and actually killed him

ep 65: finally jon is actually acknowledging something is wrong.

So we know Mary Keay was revived most likely with the book by gerard.

Gertrude was way more aware of the entities than Jon. mary keay referenced The End openly and she cut the eyes out of her magazines and all that which makes me think she was aware of The Eye

ep 66: please not buried alive pleeaase not buried alive. lukas of the tundra? didnt we hear the name lukas before? she wanted it to be difficult to find important files because that way bad people couldnt find them?

ep 67: agnes... the girl in the hilltop house? agnes poppin off!! he's really not gonna question how she knew where he lived?? oh no D: the tree. were they the ones working on the house? aww they kissi- OH DEAR. why did she kiss him? it seemed like she cared about him? also she could kiss that other dude on the cheek and he was fine, but maybe it was cuz she was younger? lightless flame go brrrrr.

ep 68: oh god books. yup its bitchboy leitner. mans said "this seems supernatural, its a werd book!" bruuh.

ep 69: heh nice. aw cmon jon listen to martin. gahhh spiders. is that the class we heard about in the other doctor one with the teeth apple? some kind of psych class? oh dear. fucking spiders. aaaah. web do be goin brr. it's like the girl in the homeless shelter! who made the guy leave and she took his bed.

ep 70: is this gonna be the book that mary keay had? Most likely a leitner no matter what. Oh boy latin. Why did it start in latin then become old English? I'm guessing people put them in the book? He cant burn it. Phrophecies go brr. He says eh it's a decade in the future it's fine. Its gonna have changed. Ayy called it. Just accept it, it's a magic book. His death is getting closer. Leitner didnt make them but just collected them? Gertrude burned the book! She burned them down there so no one would know.

ep 71: oh boy tunnels. Our favorite thing /s. is The Buried a thing? Idk this seems pretty buried. Oh dear he's trapped here isnt he. "Not enough space to move, never enough to breathe" is that from the computer episode? With the guy who uploaded his consciousness? Somebody living down there. Hmmmm. Guesses: tom, sasha's boyfriend. Gertrude herself? (Though I doubt it)

ep 72: sweeney todd moment. Meat. The slaughter? Idk we'll see what the supernatural part is. Meat is meat. Similar to the slaughterhouse episode. Is it fucking Jared I swear to God it better not be. Hooligan teenagers, you know how it is. Meat is me lmao. Is the kid gonna be in the freezer. Ok that's good. OWW. Oddly textured candles. Made from people? Human fat or smth? Tom from the meat processing plant!

ep 73: outer bay shipping. Bet it's a subset of breacon and hope delivery. The Dark go brrr. Uh oh mans is gonna die. Leo or whatever. Cult ppl go brr. The people's church of the divine host. Who is the divine host? Is it reigner or whatever his name is? I dont think Jon can quit tbh. Probably an anonymous tip but from who?? One of the entities?

ep 74: fucking teeth hhh. I dont know which entity is related to teeth. Spiral. Isnt the spiral an entity. It feels like it could be related to many things idk. Yeah this sounds like the spiral. Heart attack at 29? Jesus... michael! That's kinda what I was thinking. Sasha goin in the tunnels. Hmm sus. They move the floor. Wack. Bet its tom.

ep 75: Man with a lightning scar. Has one of the leitner books. The childhood friend of the one who first introduced us to leitner. Oh my god that sounds terrifying. Michael crew.

ep 76: scalpel? Hmm spooky. NotSasha... think jon think.

ep 77: another double! NotThem, The Stranger. Not related to the table?

ep 78: what was that at the beginning? Question mark?? Oh boy more NotThem. Decker... what is the deal with the table. Does it contain the creature? Fucking Michael. Bitchboi himself.

ep 79: yes pop off martin. Ugh fucking Michael just leave man. I hate that dude. New person. Hmm. No idea who it is.

ep 80: shitener himself! Ok sir tell us the entities. Ayy The Spiral. Ok we know what that one is. The Eye is the beholding! Oooh. The Stranger. Did elias just kill leitner? Popping off honestly.

[dean-the-smol-bean]

The Fall (62 Minutes Pt. 10 RE-UPLOAD)

Pairing: Dean x Reader, Sam x Best Friend!Reader

Characters: Dean, Sam, Ruby, Reader

Word count: 6k

Summary: deans back from the grave, and he has unfinished business with you.

Warnings: smut, nsfw, cursing, mentions of death, mentions of alcoholism, guns, ptsd

A/N: I have to reupload this because after tumblrs adult content sweep they flagged it as adult content, which is fun. They got a bunch of my fics that had gifs in them, and now I can’t even see some of them even though it says its “only viewable to me” which is just dandy, but im gonna try and get them back and re-upload them too. I have every chapter of 62 minutes in a folder on my computer though so thankfully I had this- thank GOD, it’s not like it’s the most pivotal chapter in the fic so far. It’s fine. I’m not annoyed. everything is fine. 

anyways the chapter is inspired by the song “the fall” by imagine dragons except when they’re fucking in which case I think it goes with take me to church by hozier? idk. it’s been like a year.  

Have a Request? Message me! I want to get back into writing and requests would be an amazing help.

Send me a message if you would like to be tagged in future parts!

“Miss me, sweetheart?”

 He smiled down at you sheepishly, as if he’d showed up late after a night out. As if this was normal. For a moment, you froze, unable to register what was in front of you.

 And then everything clicked into place, and you stumbled back to your feet, pushing yourself up using the back of the couch next to you and grabbing your gun.

 You lifted it up, having to use two hands just to keep it steady between your shaking limbs.

 Deans eyes widened, staggering backward. He raised his hands, trying to show you he meant no harm. Bobby had been right- maybe dropping in with no warning on the woman who allegedly hadn’t spoken in four months because of his death wasn’t the greatest idea.

 “Y/N-”

 “How dare you.” Your voice shook, but it wasn’t from tears (not yet anyway), it was from rage.

 “How dare you- you shifter- demon- zombie- bastard-”

“Y/N, please-”

 “NO! No. Don’t. Don’t you dare. How dare you even think of taking his image- of parading around in his skin- how dare-”

 “Y/N, honey, just listen for a second-”

 “Don’t honey me! You don’t get to call me that you- you… you aren’t him. He’s dead, okay, he’s gone- and- and I’m not gonna let you convince me otherwise. No one can. I- I can’t- I can’t let myself think for even a second that you might be-”

 You choked off, swallowing. Dean watched you with crestfallen eyes, desperate to scoop you up and take you into his arms.

 “Because- because if I do, and then you’re not- I don’t know if I could survive that.”

 Your voice broke, and it was no longer from rage. The crack was deep and sharp in your words; the kind of sound you only hear just before someone is about to break completely. Like the first, tiny crack before a dam bursts.

 And so it did. The tears came hot and quick, flooding down your cheeks. You were barely keeping up your gun, your arms weak as you tried to mask the fact that your legs felt like jelly.

 Dean swallowed, trying to keep himself from sweeping you into a bone crushing hug, inevitably getting himself shot in the process. He began in a whisper, low and calm, trying to comfort you despite the gun pointed (albeit weakly) at his face.

 “Y/N, listen to me, for a second, okay? It’s gonna be alright. I’m not a Demon or a shifter, or a zombie. I promise. Look, let me prove it to you, hold on”

 He lowered his arm, reaching to the back of his waistband.

 “I’m gonna grab my silver knife, okay? Look.” He pulled it out. “See? You know this knife. I’ve had it since I was seventeen. Pure silver. You’ve seen it a million times. Look, Y/N.”

 You watched, terrified, as he rolled back his flannel sleeve, revealing his taut forearm. He clenched his fist pressing the knife into his skin. You held your breath, waiting for the steam.

 He slid it across his skin, and blood dripped around the edges of his blade, dripping down his arm and onto the floor. It was a small cut really, just a few drops, but enough to show that he wasn’t a shapeshifter.

 “See? No sting.��� He raised his eyebrows and you. You said nothing.

 “Where’s your holy water?”

 You shifted back and forth on your feet, unable to force any words through your throat. You nodded feebly to the counter to his left, a flask buried under a stack of ramen packets.

 He brushed them off, picking up the flask and opening it. He held eye contact, raising it to you as if in cheers.

 “All me.”

 He took a gulp.

 A sob slipped from your lips, and everything just fell apart. Your knees gave, and you nearly dropped to the floor, caught just before you hit the ground, strong arms encircling you like a safety net, dropping down with you so the both of you kneeled to the floor safely, his arms tighter than they’d ever felt before. The gun fell with a clang, but you both ignored it, wrapping your arms around his neck and gripping his jacket, burying yourself in him.

 And then you sobbed. Heavy and loud, tears streaking into the soft, warm, living skin where his neck and shoulder met.

 Finally, when the sobs subsided, your hiccupping slowing to a minimum of once or twice every few minutes, you spoke, voice still raspy.

 “How?”

 Dean pulled back a little so that he could get a good look at you, shaking his head.

 “I… have no idea. I just woke up in my grave, and... now I’m here. Good as new.” He paused, pursing his lips in thought.

 “I take it from everything that just happened, you weren’t the one who got me out.”

 “No.”

 He glanced away, thinking. You were both still pressed firmly against each other, kneeling on the living room floor, wrapped around each other.

 “Okay, okay good.” He leaned forward, kissing you on the forehead, a wave of relief rushing over him.

 “Good.”

 For a minute, you both just sat there holding onto each other silently, not doing anything, just relishing in the feeling that you were both there.

 Suddenly, Dean spoke up.

 “Hey, Y/N?”

 You quirked your head up to look at him.

 “Hm?”

  “There’s something I need to do. That I didn’t get to.”

  You furrowed your brow, confused, ready to force yourself to stand, to tear yourself away from him.

 “What’s that?”

 He paused, eyes roaming over your face frantically, taking in every detail, convincing himself it was real. Convincing himself he was really about to do what he thought he was.

 “This,”

 And then his lips were on yours. And it was more than anything either of you could have possibly conjured up in your feeble imaginations, fantasizing about one another in dingy motel rooms when you had nothing better to do.

 You were soft, so impossibly soft and sweet. Like honey and lavender and chocolate and all the sweetest things together wrapped up in a little present just for him.

 He was soft too, oh so surprisingly soft. Your lips moved against his perfectly- it wasn’t magic, no. It was a kiss. But it was a kiss waited for, for over fifteen years. It was a kiss long since imagined by both participants. It was a kiss between two people that were so desperately in need of each other and in love with each other that even though it wasn’t magic, no force in the world could ever tear them apart.

 But finally, when they did part, it was of their own will. Dazed and a little bit bruised in the lips-  which were pink and plump and absolutely distracting had it not been for the fact the both of you were struggling to get your eyes open.

 “God, I really wish I’d done that a long time ago.” He breathed, barely able to keep himself together.

  “Mm-hm. No more wasting time,” you nodded, pulling his lips back to yours, cupping his cheeks. He grinned into your mouth, breathy laugh muffled by his lips molding into yours.

 Without really thinking, he stood, pulling you to your feet with him, somehow managing to keep your lips interlocked as he did. You took one, maybe two steps back, and the next thing you knew, you were tumbling down, bum pressed against the arm of the sofa. Dean, lost in your lips, plummeted down with you. You froze, the both of you stuck between each other, deans entire body pressed up against you, his elbows the only thing keeping him from crushing you completely, lost in each other’s eyes.

 And then you laughed. Wholehearted and light, and just as he did in the fall, Dean followed after you. You couldn’t remember the last time you laughed this hard- or at all, really.

  God his laugh was gorgeous. Full and hearty, his eyes crinkling up in the corners, head thrown back (quite awkwardly in the position he was in), shaking with joy.

 As the laughter drifted out of you, slowly dissipating into the quiet of the cold, winter cabin, so did the realization that you were here, in his grasp, right in front of him, drift over the both of you.

 He repositioned himself, bringing his hand- rough and calloused- to the side of your face, stroking his thumb over your cheek.

 “God I missed you.” He breathed.

 You swallowed, the revelation of the person you love being alive and well, right in front of- or rather- on top of you, sending your heart racing.

 He leaned down, pressing his lips back into yours, sweet and slow this time, but somehow all the more passionate. You raised your arms, carding your hands through his hair, tugging softly on the silky strands.

 “Dean,” you panted, barely able to speak between kisses, desperate to keep your lips close to his.

 “Need to feel you. Need you. All of you.”  

 He grunted a little as if trying to hold something back.

 “I know. Me too.” He whispered, his voice muffled between your lips.

 It was more than just sex. More than just a need for something you’ve wanted since you were fifteen. It was the need to be able to feel one another, completely. To be able to know that you were both there, standing next to each other. Safe. Sound. Whole.

 Finally, he pulled back, and you whined, But he pulled you up with him, standing on your feet for only a second, before his strong arms slid down your form, sweeping you off of them. You didn’t think, you just moved, connecting your lips with his and clutching him closely, wrapping your legs around his waist.

 You felt as he made his way towards the stairs, and you separated your lips from his so he could see. Instead, you made your way down, kissing and sucking every square inch you could get your lips on and before you knew it, he was laying you down on your bed upstairs.

 He followed your lead, kissing down your neck, slow and easy, taking his time.

 His hand wandered, eventually finding their way under your shirt, trailing up your stomach and your sides. You were suddenly very aware of the fact that you were wearing almost nothing. That your heart was beating harder and faster than you ever thought possible. That this was actually happening.

 He pushed up your shirt, nearly above your breast before you blushed, tensing up involuntarily.

 He stopped, pulling away immediately, sensing your discomfort.

 “Hey,” he exhaled, a hand coming up to stroke your cheek.

 “Is something wrong? Because we can stop if you don’t-”

 “No, no I do,” you assured, lifting your hand and resting it on his neck, playing with the hairs at the base of his head.

 “It’s just I… I don’t know, you’re so- and I’ve wanted this for so long- but what if I’m not-”

 What if you weren’t good enough? Pretty enough? Skilled enough? Dean Winchester had been with a lot of women in his life- a lot of gorgeous ones at that, and none of them ever left unsatisfied. Most times neither did he. What if you couldn’t compare? What if he sees you and decides to change his mind?

 He cuts you off.

 “Honey,” he sighs. “You are by far the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on. No one could even compare.”

 It was like he read your mind. You searched his eyes, desperate to find some sign that he was lying, that this was some joke- because it had to be- and you’d rather figure that out now before you got even more attached.

 But there was nothing.

 Your body relaxed a bit, and he smiled.

 “Ready?” he asked, and you bit your lip, nodding.

 He moved his hand, palm pressed lightly against your abdomen, sliding across your skin softly. He pulled at the hem of your- well, his- shirt, and you pushed yourself up so that he could lift it off of you.

 Before you could even think to be self-conscious, his pupils dilated, sucking in a breath of air.

 “Fucking gorgeous,”

 His eyes raked over you, and even though you had yet to take off your panties, you’d never felt so naked. His gaze was indescribable, but in that little room, just for a moment, you felt as beautiful as he saw you.

 His lips dropped to your skin, pressing softly between the valley of your breasts. Then, they latched around your nipple, sucking softly and nipping ever so gently with his teeth. You shuddered, arching your back slightly as he brought his left hand up to tend to your other breast. He twisted the nub between your fingers, heat pooling between your legs.

 He stayed there for a while, switching between each breast, making sure to give them equal attention.

Finally, he continued down, leaving wet open mouthed kisses down your stomach.

  Before you knew it, he was kneeling at the end of the bed, your legs hanging on either side of his head.

 You pushed yourself up on your elbows so that you could look at him, and he watched you intently, reaching behind himself and shucking off his t-shirt.

  "Oh my god, Dean, what's that?"

  You practically jumped up, straightening up, forgetting completely that you were nearly naked, and that Dean Winchester was between your legs.

  "What- oh. That." he glanced at his shoulder, and you frowned.

  "Yes, that! Are you okay, what the hell is-"

  "It's alright, beautiful, I promise. It was there when I... 'woke up'. I'm okay, really. It doesn't hurt." he assured. You stared at it, in awe.

  Slowly, you leaned forward pressing a kiss in its center.

 You leaned back, and he smiled at you.

  "All better." he breathed, and you rolled your eyes, falling back on your elbows.

 He held your gaze, pulling you forward, lifting your legs so your thighs rested on his shoulders, and then he dipped his mouth.

 He didn’t go straight in like you imagined, even over your panties. No, instead. He pressed his lips to the inside of your thigh, just shy of your now soaking heat.

 “Christ,” you sighed, letting your head fall back against the soft pillows of your bed.

 After quite a bit of kissing, nipping and sucking between your legs- once you were sure you had more than one bruise down there- he pressed his mouth against your panties. You shuddered, his mouth closing slowly in an open mouth kiss.

 He started at the top, pecking down your panties, which somehow felt both way too thick and impossibly thin at the same exact time.

 Just as you were about ready to beg, you felt him hook his thumbs in the waistband of said detestable underwear. You lifted your hips as he pulled them down, slowly kissing each inch of skin as he passed it by.

 You leaned up, trying to get a good look at him, but it didn’t last long, because he was back between your legs, and just as soon as you lifted your head, he locked eyes with you, stretched out his tongue, and slid it up your pussy in one long, perfect swipe. You fell back against the bed once more

 Meanwhile, Dean- who was thoroughly enjoying himself between your legs- couldn’t think of a better moment in his entire life.

  God you tasted good. No girl he’d ever been with had tasted this good. He looked up, sliding his tongue in delicate circles around your clit, watching as you arched against him, hands dropping down and raking through his hair.

 And fuck, you were gorgeous. Your skin was so soft and creamy, every curve and edge of you perfect, just waiting to be grabbed, and kissed, and admired.

 You moaned, and he nearly lost it. His pants were tight, strained uncomfortably against the tent pressing at the front of them, and he was sure he was already hard enough to cut glass. But he didn’t care because all he wanted to do was taste you. Dip his tongue in your waters and drown in them.

 You were a fucking goddess. He was sure of it. There was no other explanation- you were a goddess, and your body was the temple in which you resided. He sat on his knees in front of you, desperate to worship.

 He wrapped his lips around your clit, and you whimpered, yanking his face even closer to you.

 He moaned, sliding his tongue into you as deeply as he was able. You moaned too, high pitched and strained, and you writhed so much under him that he had to place a hand on your stomach to keep you steady.

 The other hand, however, was free. So with nimble fingers, he slipped two of them into you, pumping them in and out, moving your tongue back over your clit and alternating between flicking and circling it. It took him a bit of exploring, watching you intently, but he finally brushed up one little part of you, bumpy and ridged under his fingers. You cried out, loud and raspy, your back arching involuntarily.

 “Oh god-”

 He grinned, and he curled his fingers, pulling them towards himself in a ‘come here’ motion, each time brushing against that one spot, causing you to go insane, his tongue still working mercilessly.

 “Yes, god, yes. Right there, don’t stop, oh fuck- Dean-” he reached up and removed a hand from his hair, bringing it to your hip, intertwining his fingers with yours. You gripped him something fierce, fingers nearly turning white, and he stared up at you, sultry, his own fingers still pumping in and out.

 “Yes, yes, Dean. Fuck, Dean- Dean, Dean, Dean, Dean-” you kept going until his name was the only thing you knew. Nothing else could get in or out of your mind other than him, and his hands, and his tongue, and his lips, and fuck- just him.

 You cried his name one last time as the coil in your stomach snapped, your walls clenching around his fingers. He moaned into you, but it was drowned out by the sound of you screaming his name, though he couldn’t complain in the slightest.

 When you finally came back to earth, sweaty and panting, you realized he was kissing his way back up to your stomach.

 His lips closed around yours, and you sighed, and you could taste yourself on his lips- it wasn't something that had ever particularly got you going but, god, you swear- Dean could do just about anything and you’d melt.

 “You’re so beautiful,” he sighed, breathing the words into your lips between kisses as if trying to breathe the idea down your throat.

  “I love you,”

 When you could finally think in full sentences again, you responded by pushing at his shoulder, signaling for him to roll over. He did, flopping onto his back next to you. You rolled on top of him, leaning down and kissing his neck. You took your time, tasting him, leaving marks- you wanted the whole wide world to know he was yours, and you were his.

 You reached down, fumbling with his belt a bit before sliding it out of its loops, tossing it to the side. You unbuttoned his pants with little effort, barely sliding them down before reaching in, grabbing his member and pulling it out, rock hard in your palm.

 You didn’t see it because your lips were still entranced by his neck, but you could feel him, and god- he was huge. You didn’t need to see him to know that he was the biggest you’d ever been with- eight inches at the least.

  You ran your thumb over his tip, catching a bit of precum that had developed. He shuddered, biting his lip in an attempt to control his moan.  

 Continuing your movements, you began to make your way down his chest, kissing every inch you could, just like he had done to you, desperate to taste every inch of him.

 You didn’t get very far before he reached down, grabbing your chin with his hand and pulling you back up to his face, capturing your lips in his for a chaste kiss.

 “Not now, beautiful. I need you- need to be in you,” You nodded, and he rolled the both of you back over, so that you were lying on your back below him. He pushed himself up, hopping off the bed, standing at the end of it.

  You watched as he moved, hooking his fingers into the waist of his briefs and his jeans, sliding them off all in one. Your eyes widened, and you swallowed- the man was a fucking Greek god. His stomach, strong and toned, accompanied by hefty, muscled arms am shoulders, dusted with freckles, strong bowlegs and thick, sturdy thighs that drove you insane.

  And god, was he big. It was one thing to feel it, but now that you were really looking at it- it was no wonder so many women left him feeling dazed and confused- with a package like that, and skills as fine as his- you were a goner.

 He hopped back on the bed, crawling towards you, kissing all the way up from your feet to your lips.

 You slid your hands up to his neck, letting your legs fall open, and he reached under you, hand gripping your waist like it was the only thing anchoring him to earth.

 “You sure?” he asked, and you almost laughed. You’d been waiting for this your whole life, he had too, and still, he cared about nothing more than your comfort.

 You leaned up to him, kissing him softly, sweet and slow, trying to pour everything you felt out through it.

 “More than I've ever, been” you breathed, and with that, he pressed himself into you, taking it slow, aware of how big he was.

 Inch by inch he sheathed himself into you, brow knit together, mouth hung ever so slightly agape. You looked similar, your neck craned back, pressed against the mattress.

 Finally, his hips were pressed flat against yours, feeling fuller than you ever had.

 You whimpered, gripping his back tightly, nails digging into his shoulders, head buried in the crook of his neck.

  He let out a groan.

 “You good, babygirl?”

 You nodded, voice a bit strained.

 “Y-yeah. Just gimme a s-second.”

 He paused, unmoving, making sure his hips went nowhere, but kissing up and down your neck and your chest sporadically.

 There were a few moments where pain twinged, your walls not used to being pushed so far, but it didn’t take long to surpass, adjusting to his size, and when you did, you sighed, letting your head fall back against the pillows.

 You pulled his face down to you, kissing him fervidly.

 “Make love to me, Dean Winchester.”

  He groaned, dropping his head to your shoulder. Before you knew it, he was moving, your body already arching against him.

 He pulled out of you almost completely, before thrusting back in, causing both of you to let out a long moan. He continued, thrusting his hips slowly, in and out.

 It took him no time at all to find that spot again, and when he did, you screamed, digging your nails into your shoulders so deep you thought you might just break skin.

 He took note and made sure to pound into that spot exactly, over and over, mercilessly.

 He slid his hand down between you, reaching for your clit and rubbing in quick circles, causing you to cry out even more. You felt the coil winding up in your stomach, getting ready to burst once again, and just as you were about to reach your breaking point, you shoved him over, rolling the two of you into opposite positions.

 He stared up at you for a moment, wide eyed and surprised, and you tossed your hair to the side, panting, still sheathed around him.

 “You’re fucking gorgeous, you know that kid?”

 He slid his hands into yours, tangling your fingers together, pulling you down to his lips so that he could kiss you again- he hadn’t done it nearly enough, not yet, not ever.

 Leaning back up, you ran your hands through your hair, keeping it from your face. Separating your hands from his, you planted your palms firmly on his chest, arching your back, closing your eyes as his cock swiveled in you, brushing hard up against your g-spot. Your mouth hung open, past the point of even moaning. If you hadn’t been dizzy with pleasure, you would’ve noticed Dean gaping up at you, practically drooling.

 “Fuck,” you said it at the same time- his, a breathy groan, unable to contain his awe for you and how fucking gorgeous you were. Yours, high and strained, unsure of how much longer you’d last if not even moving drove you this insane.

 But then you did, and you through your head back, brow furrowed, eyes screwed shut, the both of you groaning obscenely. You bounced on top of him and he watched hungrily, eyes and hands roaming over every inch of you, grasping at your sides, pushing himself up into you as you moved.

 And then you stopped bouncing, but you kept moving. You twisted your hips, swiveling them in circles.

 And then he let out an unfamiliar sound- weak and breathy, like a whimper, nothing like any sound he’d ever made before- but holy fuck that was good.

 He couldn’t take it anymore because he needed to touch you, every single inch- so he pushed himself up, wrapping his arms around you and pressing his chest against yours.

 He thrust his hips, sliding up and down as he pushed himself upwards and into you. You kissed him, heavy and wet, lost in the feeling of your him inside you. But then he brushed up against your g-spot again, and  you cried out, leaning down and biting onto his shoulder, raking your hands down his back, surely leaving marks.

 “Fucking hell. Love you so much. So much, Y/N.”

 he panted, pulling you back and into his lips, kissing you, slow and sultry.

 You whined, barely squeaking out anything, stuttering each time he thrust into you.

 The coil wound itself up a third time, and this time you were sure you couldn’t contain it. You bit down onto him again, clutching the strong muscles of his back as the earthquake approached.

 “Dean, I’m so-”

 “I know babygirl. Go ahead. I’m right behind you.” He panted, voice nearly as strained as yours.

 And as if on command, you did, screaming his name into his freckled shoulder, entire body shaking, pussy gripping his cock, throbbing around him.

 “Oh, fuck,” he bleated, his voice wavering.

 Just as you began to come down, you felt his hips stutter, pistoning in and out of you erratically, and you could tell he was close. You kissed the bite mark on his shoulder, and he slid his hands up your back, holding onto you for dear life. He was moaning and groaning and whimpering all at once, generally making the sorts of sounds you’d only ever dreamed of hearing.

  Finally, he grunted, letting out a long, low groan, and you felt him spill himself inside of you. You swiveled your hips on top of him, working him through his orgasm.

 He lifted his head up, slightly dazed, and he rested his forehead against yours, breaths mingling as you panted, trying to pull yourselves together.

 Finally, your lips met, barely touching, barely moving, just feeling each other.

 You stayed like that for a while, just kissing and touching and sighing. You were wrapped around each other, pressed up against one another as close as physically possible, your head buried in his neck. He peppered kisses across your shoulder, hands rubbing up and down your back. Suddenly, without warning, you began shaking. He heard you whimper into his skin, the feeling of warm tears dripping onto his exhausted muscles.

 “Y/N? Baby, what’s wrong? Look at me honey, come here-” he pulled your face to his, cupping your cheek and resting his forehead against yours.

 You covered your face, embarrassed- dropping your head to his chest, trying to keep your cries quiet.  

 “Baby, please look at me. Is something wrong? Are you okay?”

 He pulled you up to look at him once again, holding your chin between his thumb and forefinger, impossibly gentle.

 You nodded quickly, wiping the tears from your face.

 “God,” you groaned, scrunching your brow together, face palming. “I can’t believe I’m crying- fuck. This is- this is not how I imagined our first time. I’m sorry, it’s just-” you hiccupped, biting your lip.

 Dean shook his head, voice soft and sweet, brushing a strand of hair out of your face and behind your ear.

 “Shh, sh, sh, no, don’t apologize. You never have to apologize to me for the way you feel. Never ever. Tell me whats wrong, beautiful.”

 You paused, trying to gather yourself for fear of exploding emotions all over him as soon as you tried to speak.

 “It’s just- god, I love you so much. So fucking much- and when you- when you- when you died. I couldn’t take it, I just couldn’t. I didn’t eat. I didn't sleep. I didn’t shower. I didn’t talk. I drank too much- and now all of a sudden you’re here. And you’re with me. And you’re real, and you’re alive, and you’re okay, and fuck, Dean, I love you so goddamn much, it's almost too much to handle.”

 Dean pulled you, close wrapping his arms around you in a hug, kissing the spot where your neck met your shoulder.

 “I know princess, I know. I missed you so goddamn much. I thought I was losing my mind without you- and then when I saw you again, and I touched you, and felt you, and then we-” he stuttered, and as if he wasn’t still literally inside of you, he blushed at the mention of what had just occurred.

 “-it was like everything was happening all at once. All you, all around me.”

 He straightened up, staring straight into your eyes, determination coursing through his veins and dripping out his lips.

 “But you listen to me, Y/N Y/L/N, I am never leaving you again, you hear? Not heaven, or hell, or anything in between could keep me away from you.”

 You swallowed, nodding softly. You weren’t sure how he would do it, or if he even could, but against all logic, you believed him.

 You sighed, stomach pressed against the soft white sheets of your bed, chin resting on your pillow, arms wrapped comfortably around it. More importantly though- under the category of arms wrapped around things- Dean was behind you, kissing up and down your back unceasingly, unable to keep his hands- or his lips for that matter- off of you.

 “You imagined out the first time?” he spoke out of the blue, surprising you slightly.

 You craned your neck over your shoulder to look at him, furrowing your brow.

 “What?” you asked, unsure of why he would ask such a question out of the blue.

 “Earlier. You said this ‘wasn’t how you imagined our first time’. So you imagined it?”

 You blushed, turning back and burying your face in the pillow.

 “Mm-hmm.” You nodded, oddly childish for the question you were answering.

 You felt him grin against your back, lips pressing to the deepest part of the arch in your spine.

“What did you imagine?” he asked, and your cheeks went up in flames.

 “Nothing much.” You squeaked, unconvincingly.

 He hummed, smirking as he made his way up your back, nipping at your earlobe.

 “Is that so,” he teased.

 You shivered, trying not to give in as he kissed across your shoulders.

 “Shouldn’t we be going?” you yelped, pushing him off you and hopping out of bed.

 He laughed, falling onto his back.

 You leaned over, picking up your panties to slide them on, quickly realizing they were not wearable, tossing them to the side and walking to the dresser, pulling out a fresh pair and slipping them on.

 Dean stared unapologetically, watching as the thin, lacey fabric stretched over your bum, cupping it perfectly.

 “My god, you are a work of art.” He sighed, tilting his head to the side as if to get a better look. You whipped your head around, blushing

 “Shut up.” You mumbled, pursing your lips in a pout. He only grinned more. “Come on, I mean it, Dean! Wheres Sam? And Bobby? Do they even know you’re back yet?”

 Dean rolled his eyes, pouting as you slipped on your bra.

 “Bobby knows. I went to him first- he was the only one I could get ahold of. He sent me your way- not after soaking me in holy water though.” He complained. You laughed, sliding on a pair of jeans, wiggling your hips into them- an odd feeling after spending so long not caring enough to wear more than an old ratty tee.

 “Smart. And Sam?”

 Dean glanced at the window, sighing deeply.

 “Not yet. Bobby told me you were here, and my mind just went blank. It’s like I was on auto pilot. I had to see you.”

 Your ears tinged red, and you turned away, grabbing a shirt and pulling it over your head.

 “He really just leave you behind?”

 You turned to look at Dean, thinking back to that night, on the way back from burying him. None of you said a word, not except maybe Bobby, saying you should get some sleep. He knew you wouldn’t though, so he just marched up to his bedroom, the same as the rest of you, no idea how to move on from this point besides drowning his sorrows in liquor.

 You and Sam caught each other’s eyes, just before stepping into your rooms. You didn’t say anything. There was nothing that could be said. And then you both turned.

 The next morning the Impala was gone. So were all his things.

 You understood.

 In fact, you understood so much that you threw some clothes and a toothbrush into a bag, wrote a note, and hopped in your own car.

 “Dean…”

 “No, I’m serious. He just left you and Bobby behind? Went off on his own?”

  You whirled around, raising your voice.

 “Everything was different, Dean! I know we promised to stay together but… You were dead! None of us knew how to handle it- we were all just trying to cope. Hell, I left too." You raised your arms, motioning to the cabin around you. You sighed.

  "You don’t know what it was like, Dean.”

 Your voice dropped, eyes glancing to the floor, avoiding his gaze. Dean pushed himself up on his elbow, frowning, feeling guilty. As amazing as the last couple hours had been, your wounds were still raw.

 “Y/N, I-”

 You cleared your throat, cutting him off.

 “Yeah, uh, you should get dressed. We really should get going.”

 You leaned down, grabbing his jeans and his briefs, pushing them into his chest.

 You turned to go grab your boots, but he grabbed your arm, bringing your attention back to him before you could even straighten your back.

 “Hey,” he breathed, “I love you.”

 He pulled you down by your shirt sleeve, kissing you sweetly. You leaned away, blushing, clearing your throat.

 “I love you too.” You rushed, turning away and walking over to your boots awkwardly, feeling his eyes on your back. He grinned- adorable.

 You took a seat at the end of the bed, bending over and sliding on your first boot, listening as Dean rustled behind you, the bed dipping and lifting as he moved, pulling on his jeans.

 He stood, walking over towards the dresser to pick up his discarded shirt, pausing in front of the mirror.

 “Dear god woman.” He laughed, and you looked up, confused.

 Your eyes grew wide- all across his back, there were long, deep, red claw marks, covering practically every inch of him.

 “I mean, I knew I was good, but I didn’t know I was that good.” He smirked, and you glared at him, turning back to your shoes.

 “I hate you.” You grumbled.

 “Mm. That’s not what you were saying oh, ten minutes ago.”

 You rolled your eyes, unable to wipe that wretched pink off your cheeks.

 “You’re an idiot.” You quipped, quickly tying your second boot and standing. He pulled on his shirt, stepping over and dropping down on the end of the bed, facing you. He leaned back on his palms, legs spread, grinning up at you like a gorgeous asshole.

 “Yeah but, I’m your idiot now, so,” He raised his eyebrows, lip quirking up into a lopsided smirk.

 “Yes,” you nodded, sighing deeply, unable to wipe the smile from your face despite your best efforts. You grabbed his chin between your fingers, pulling his lips to yours. He reacted immediately, a hand on your neck, pulling you even closer, the two of you grinning like idiots.

 “Yes, you are.”