#idk why im posting this yolo maybe if i talk about it and there is a smidge of public interest ill be spurred to finish it

[spearxwind]

I never posted this joke back when I first draw it (and i refuse to share the old art) but back when I made talas I made a horrid joke the punchline of which was him just eating a whole guy (dan) accompanied by a slide whistle noise and I thought and still think its one of the funniest things ever and i need to redraw it so bad so i can post it but my god it's definitely a lil hard to translate in the new setting bc it requires another character who is also a freak to be committing violence. But yeah basically I will be drawing that someday let this post be a warning

[horce-divorce]

hey, you. yes you. follower, mutual, mutual-in-law, other tumblr comrades hiding here amid the last bastion of the aughties internet. do you hate and resent social media? does it give you anxiety to visit Facebook or Twitter, leaving your desire to feel connected left unsatisfied? do you long for the days of yore when we used to log onto some obscure forum and roleplay our OCs seemingly without a care in the world?

ok so like.... wanna come hang out w me on my forum w me???

yeah it ain't much right now, but hear me out.

for years social media has had a chokehold on the internet, and it got REAL hard to have your own unique space that wasn't contained within some bigger network. i get it; i also haven't left facebook, despite my posturing and threats, because noobody else did, either, and I wanted to stay in touch with them.

but proboards still exists. it has this whole time. neocities now also exists. the web revival is small but happening, and people ARE finally leaving social media, for better or worse-- some cutting off digital connections entirely rather than just finding different ways of connecting.

if we want to keep (or reintroduce) those elements of web 1.0 that we long for-- the customization/involvement in web dev, the community elements, the organization without algorithm, the charm of it all-- we have to be the ones to preserve that, and like... we can! we can just do that, friends. we literally have the ability right now. here it is. you miss forums, you say?? yet, will you not post on one???

so far there is no real guideline for this forum so don't worry about that. i made it for me and my friends so we can still have somewhere to chat if they're in FB jail or whatever. there's no other goal or unifying criteria. most of my friends are queer and disabled, so you'll wanna be able to get along w queer disabled folks, but you don't have to be one yourself. you dont even have to be my friend already, getting to know each other is kinda the whole point! and maybe it'll change, maybe if people actually come hang out w me the concept will solidify or we'll come up with a solid theme, or a new name or something. that'd be great cus I kinda hate that we called it the common room now, i wish it was something less ... british sounding :-) lmfao but w/e. im not gonna make a new one unless anyone is actually talking to me. or if I think of a good name myself maybe idk. we'll see

i'm honestly down for whatever, I am just so tired of seeing so many people agree that we all miss forums, and no one doing anything about it. considering a) proboards has been here the whole time and b) we all hate social media vocally and c) some of us are even like "I Loved forums! I miss them! why are they not a thing!" well!! that's kind of on us? they ARE a thing! so why did we stop using them? IDK! join mine and make it A Thing again!!!

or better yet, make your own!! if you hate my lack of direction, you can just do that instead!!! make the epic ATLA RP forum you always wanted to!!! live your damn life!!! YOLO and corporations are stealing your time and life force away, learn bbcode while you still can!!!!!!

⭐ J O I N M E.... it'll probably be boring but in a more chill and positive way than social media <3 ⭐

[mull3ts]

— 2021.

hey shawties <3

another day, another slay. TAKE THIS POST AS A TUMBLR WRAPPED EXCEPT IM DOING IT AHA. anyways, this year was rather eventful 🤨 i hope you've all had a good year, MINE WAS LIKE A SOLID 8/10 THERE'S GONNA BE TWO MAYBE THREE IMPORTANT THINGS THIS POST IS GONNA CONTAIN SO LETS START.

1. I graduated :D

bWAHAHHAHHHAHHAAHAH i finally graduated college like a total girboss. ik what you're thinking, i WAS IN COLLEGE?

y e a h

i girlbossed, got by bachelor's of science in psychology, and am now an assistant professor in abnormal psychology thEn after i finish a semester of assisting in that i was offered to teach forensic psychology :D because i got a minor in, yk it doesnt matter aNyWAYS SO YEAH THAT'S, THAT'S WHAT I'LL BE DOING.

2. IM GETTING MARRIED???????

yeah ik that sounds really weird to say and to type out, bUT IM GETTING MARRIED????

idk when to tell yall but here we are 🙄 IM MARRYING YOUR PADRE THIS FEELS REALLY WEIRD TO TYPE OUT WTF anywhosies but now his era of always going to tiffany makes sense now. IK WHAT YOU MIGHT BE THINKING, MADRE??? WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN??? WHEN DID HE PROPOSE??? it happened like on my birthday i cnant. anywhosies- it's happening. in the spring. because I LIKE HOW IT LOOKS OUTSIDE IN THE SPRING AND I HAVE THIS FILM THING CALLED EKTACHROME 100 SPEED AND ITS FUCKING PRETTY. SO I WILL BE A MARRIED WOMAN, IN THE SPRING.

I FEEL SO AMAZED YET ODD, IS 22 YOUNG TO BE MARRIED? I HAVE NO CLUE IM JUST YOLO-ING. SOMEBODY ASK ME A FUCKING QUESTION TO MAKE SURE THAT IM SURE ABOUT YOUR PADRE BECAUSE YES I DO LOVE HIM SO VERY MUCH OH MY GOD THIS IS HAPPENING TO ME.

i need to breathe 🤨

tO cLARIFY THO I AM NOT LEAVING RIGHT NOW, I WILL PROB MAKE MY DEPARTURE FROM THIS BLOG IN A FEW MONTHS SO DONT WORRY! :D

3. the blog.

whAT'S GONNA HAPPEN TO THE BLOG??? LUCKY FOR YOU ALL WHEN I MAKE MY DEPARTURE FROM THIS BLOG IN THE SPRING/SUMMER, THE BLOG IS JUST GONNA GET REBRANDED :D the one and only, @je-no will be the admin of this blog, SO YOU'LL GET CAM, SHOW CAM LOVE SHE'S GREAT, SHE'S MY BBGORL YALL, MY IRL WIFE GO SAY HI TO HER CAMILLA MY BBYGORL, MY SLUT IF YOU SEE THIS I LOVE YOU WHAT A BISEXUAL ICON SHE IS I DONT KNOW WHY I MENTIONED THAT I LOVE HER anyways all that's prob gonna change about is the url, layout, and admin. the url is gonna change to @/mull3ts SO IF YOU SEE THIS BLOG BECOME THAT YK WASSUP.

ikik, MADRE WE WILL MISS YOU, I WILL MISS YOU TOO. so for that very reason the @/earth-to-that-asian url will become a side blog that i'll still check every now and then if you still wanna contact me from the grave or ask if i have a kid or got a divorce, but im sure cam will prob give you abi life updates. she'll queue all of those beautiful drafts i have and still give you more of what's expected, nct dilf and stepbro so you all will still be fed with quality content.

Surprise, surprise—camilla the great loves dilfs

I'LL EXPLAIN EVERYTHING ELSE WHEN I ACTUALLY LEAVE THO DW :D show camilla love and she will return it by marrying you and calling you her bitch, i promise she doesn't bite, gO TALK TO HER, SEND HER AN ASK RN AT @je-no

m'kay, now that everything is absolutely out of the way, i'd like to thank anyone who's honestly ever come in contact with this blog because it honestly means so much. to all my moots, anons, and everyone ever, from the bottom of my heart—thank you. my heart esp goes out to my shawties who've deactivated, you are never forgotten to me babes. i hope you all have an amazing 2022, ONLY THE BEST FOR THE GIRLS, GAYS AND THEYS—DEMOLISH 2022 WITH THE SHEER FORCE OF DAT ASS

— sincerely, abi.

look at that ass, look at that fucking ass. do you shit with that ass babygorl? dayum shawty u thicc asf gimme sum of that...

happy 2022 <33

[alukaforyou]

and ALSO sry to post bs on main im mostly just talking to myself in my personal tag half the time so yolo, no need to respond to this or reassure me or whatever but these days i licherally question how much of my - sry to sound like a broken record - bs is dépression or just my shité mentality, like i rly was not designed to last, huh? physically or mentally? lol. like who gets motion sickness on swings lmao anyways. i think i give up too easily. theres a bunch of reasons y but i dont feel like saying. its a different thing to kind of kno something, and to admit / speak it (confront it). i could psychoanalyze myself all day and tell u exactly why some things are the way they are but its too unpleasant to neatly state stuff like that u kno?? like... *i kno* but im not gonna say i kno. anywho, i digress. so i give up easily and kind of have a defeatist mentality too, its so exhausting lool. actually its weird cuz duality of man, i'll be rly determined / stubborn abt doing some stuff and not care abt fear of failure with certain things but when it comes to My Life / My Future i just think i cant rly do anything? i mean that literally like i got no skillz *laugh crying emoji* not particularly good at anything, and art - the only thing im maybe arguably ok at - i dont wanna do as a career, that is art therapy for me i dont feel like commercializing it. not interested in working in my major, maybe things wouldve been different if i went to culinary or cosmetology school?? that sounds fun. or if i majored in bio cuz i was so good at that, or even if i majored in japanese language or literature or idk. but no regrets tho cuz i learned a lot abt drawing in art school which i can use for myself. and hmm i like staying home and not rly going out of my way to meet new ppl so connections what? i h8 hearing how most opportunities come through the ppl u kno cuz its true and ik like 10 ppl tops so hm very sexi of me :^) i just feel like im p much f*cked and it rly doesnt help that i have no functional dreams, goals, or aspirations nor the confidence and drive to work towards anything so ah ok cool. u kno suga's songs "the last" and "so far away" ? that p much sums up my feels minus the part abt having to deal w fame obviously LOL. its so easy being a student (for me at least) but being a good student isnt really worth a whole lot in the """""real world""""" and the current education system doesnt even rly prepare u for reality or w.e like Deep Sigh also the political climate rly lookin like shité out there like hmmmmm do i even wanna try so hard to be here anymore tho??? also going back to the self confidence thing, ya idk her LOOOOL like it doesnt very much bother me tho? i really, honest to god have no idea what my redeeming qualities even are. being nice? and my mindset re - tolerance and compassion for others, etc, ya im rly proud of that actually but besides that i mean like what can i Do tho like hm im not particularly good at anything also im hideous like uglee but thats ok too like none of this Bothers me, thats just literally how i Am so ok fine, but i feel like it makes it hard for me to exist in the world i happen to be in??? and i realize im speaking with a huge bias here cuz my brain is totally out of whack im p sure if some1 saw me / read this they would lit be like um u literally do not have it hard girl, which is fair ur kinda right actually from an objective pov, probably? its amazing how um. hard? of a time my brain is having given my relatively ok circumstances but thats just how it is ig. and if i may quote shakespeare - o full of scorpions is my mind. and its weird cuz duality of man - i actually have a lot of good times w friends and whatever i have a lot of fun, im not even very Sad or in Agony its all very a mild? sensation? but that might be because my plan b is to simply *** so nothing rly fazes me anymore lool.

its usually a v confusing emotion, im either feeling happy, or if not that, very ???? im literally that duwang quote get a feeling so complicated its just "ajdjsjsja" idk its not overly repulsive and upsetting im like :s LOL u kno wat at this point idek what im even saying anymore but its good that im writing whatever cuz im gonna need to look back on this later and organize my thoughts for presentation cuz remember i have a s.o now???? i wanna let them kno so we r on the same page, and i dont feel like im tricking them, i thought it over more and there are like 4? major cards i wanna lay out on the table early on and they are 1. im not that close w my family emotionally so do not seek their approval or expect to deal with them much. 2. personal ideology / political views like im bi lmao and pro lgbt if that wasnt obvious also i dont rly wanna be around racists / terfs etc and if ur right wing or not on that respect women juice uhhh bye.. 3. my weak ass mentality how i might Maybe *** in the future like no promise but errrr theres one more but its a little more negotiable and also too early to discuss so i wont mention it but i already got the first two outta the way so ya. theres the most troublesome of all, #3. the last thing i wanna do is traumatize someone that loves me (and i love back) with that kinda thing, its too late for my dear friends whom i love, sorry i didnt kno i was gonna be like this LOL yall already got attached but its a little different with my s.o cuz i feel like its not too late to uh.... stop getting as attached LMAO like dam i've known my girls for almost 10 years whereas i've only known my s.o for like a month.

and this is totally not gonna come across right but if my s.o very understandably desides to dump me id be SO RELIEVED LIKE WOOOO ok cool cuz like essentially what i'd be saying is you are getting attached to someone who's future is not as stable as other people, including u. *huge exhale* from the bottom of my heart, my bad lol. and then i probs wont ever get involved w. a s.o again, sorry to reference snk in 2020 but remember how e*win smith is single cuz he doesnt kno when he will ***? big mood. i have never acted out on my interests before but i was like ok for once lets go off the shits and do smth ooc, i uh... didnt expect for it to actually go anywhere tho so now im like ???? i shouldve thought it through more tho, like i felt low key irresponsible af and selfish and dumb for getting involved w. someone even tho i Know how I Am like...... Also i just lov being single and staying home and chilling alone lmao like i seriously...... never get loney....

ok so what was i talking abt? how the passage of time makes me nervous cuz idk how i can manage to keep up w it??? how i feel like i cant do jack shit???? that life is hard???? and maybe a bih just wants to rest? permanently?????? i think the most irritating part of all for me, like what i am most mad about at myself is that i have no dream. yikes. naruto, do u think thats sad? well yoongi said its okay, and what counts is just being happy, so i will console myself and forgive her and idk just try my best for the time being??

[makreon]

it’s been six months and you haven’t heard my story about my past relationships. i remembered when we’re still new as official boyfriends, you asked me about this but you said you’ll ask me again if you’re ready to hear it fully and when you’re not jelly anymore (uwu so cute). pokes. it’s been a long time already since i already forgotten the heartbreak from them and duh, i’m only looking at you for six months now and counting. so, i hope you don’t mind if i open this up to you (just so maybe you’ll get to know my background and please don’t judge me that much 🤧) — ex #1 he was my first boyfriend upon joining igrp. we were at stay. he was baekhyun and i was sehun. we started as friends since we get along with each other plus we’re both exo-ls and we rp our ults. but then, yours truly is so oblivious and i didn’t get his signal that he likes me that’s why he’s so clingy and he likes to hangout with me. fast forward (because i have forgotten already the details lmao), we became boyfriends after two months of being friends. but then i got busy from school and i felt guilty for lowkey neglecting him because i can’t manage my time to rp while dealing with my thesis, tho i manage to talk to him like a few times in a day (tho we only have long chats during weekends). then one day, i happened to see the exo gc was suddenly alive because of new noisy members, including chanyeol. there, i get the chance to bully the hyungs because i was bratty maknae. days passed by, and i go lie low in rp again, but i once visited baek and exo gc. that i happened to see. baek is calling chanyeol ‘daddy’ in gc. i tried to remain calm and backread for more details because maybe it’s just a joke, right? but i see no hints. of course i have to question baek for that. he said he was sorry. he didn’t inform me that he was dared by kai to call chanyeol for days. i told him to stop it because it’s making me jelly. he said okay until we reconciled. but then as the time goes by, idk if it’s just me and my insecurities of chanyeol being so close to baek that grew inside me, but i really can see they were so noisy in stories (tagging each other and bullying) even in posts. it’s like i’ve been forgotten. it’s like baek doesn’t have a boyfriend. so it led to confrontation that i have to ask him if he likes chanyeol more than me. he replied that “maybe if you weren’t that busy, i wouldn’t like him.” was it my fault that i have no time for him? maybe yes because if i work enough to make time for him, this wouldn’t happen. so there, in the end we both left stay and chose to let go of each other.. — ex #2 months after, it was finally my school breaks, yay! and i was in the mood to rp again, so i joined moonlight rp as johnny and there was once a jimin who arrived and flirted upon his first day icb. again, fast forward, i decided to date him after a week of sleeping beside him lmfao skdnfkd. anyways our phase was so fast, but i slowly learned to love him and he learn to love me too as the days goes by. then one day i happened to know he’s someone i know from stay who is currently taken. it was so damn awkward when i asked for confirmation and sudden breakdown at the same time since i knew i wasn’t the only one he’s dating. yeah. multi-dating sucks. i hated it. it’s like lowkey cheating but not really. nevertheless,  i still continued to date him after finding that out because i loved him and i can’t just let go? tho it hurts a lot since i know when he’s not replying me for more than four hours. i already knew he’s with his other partners. i grew tired from being the last option, for being too extra in gifting him and in expressing how much i loved him. wherein he doesn’t equally love me. even though it was really painful, i decided to broke up with him. at first, he doesn’t want me to let go and one thing i really didn’t like about him is he lied right in front of my face. he said i’m the only one he really loved and he didn’t date any other guys beside me. like lol i even confronted you about that, how dare you to twist your answer now? it wasn’t a peaceful heartbreak so i just decided not to reply him anymore or else he will keep saying flowery things again (i looked rude but dnvkdnv nvm)

that’s how i decided to rp a younger idols since my confidence went really down  and my trust issues went high. i chose renjun among dreamies because he’s underrated and i was thinking no one will ever fall in love with me again since im just gonna be a baby to all lmao. but then, there’s you out of nowhere. you didn’t even just hit on me right away. it was a slow progress that i didn’t even noticed you have feelings for me. i was slowly being drawn to you but at the same time i keep on restricting myself not to fall again because i’m merely saving myself for another heartbreak. it was long ass ride of thinking but in the end, i chose to swallow all my words. there i decided to yolo and fall for you freely. and that was a best decision i ever had because i have you now uwu.

— 

so that’s my story. tbh i thank them because i gained experience loving persons and i learned a lot to be a better boyfriend in the future. now i can really say i’m better at understanding and being patient to you. i’m still trying my best to express my love and i do really hope it reaches. so, thank you, next @ them because i live for my mark lee now~

[thegeminisage]

since i FINALLY finished the comic page im gonna make the poor choice of playing zelda ALL NIGHT get ready for The Longest Post which is full of Big Super Spoilers

since lynel thoroughly kicked my can last night i need defense food and preferably stronger weapons

i technically already had more than enough shock arrows to proceed but i wanna kill him!!!!

LMFAO I JUST COOKED SOMETHING THAT GIVES ME 21 EXTRA HEARTS...HOLY FUCK

okay but in all seriousness i only have like 3 defense things........

i guess i'll try it fuck i dont feel like scouring the world for ironshrooms rn

ok. slept on the bed to get my stamina wheel & 3 hearts, will use my 21 hearts when those run out, got 3 defense things for about 14m of defense, I Can Do This

really i wish i had a one-handed weapon, two-handers are so slow :/

well here we go again :|||

lol why does my heartrate always go up for shit like smh.....

getting better at dodging

ooh he hates my ice arrows

HAHAHA I MOUNTED HIM

maybe i can get a snapchat pic

YES i did i didn't attack him in that perfect moment but hey some thing are more important

NOOO FUCK I DIED

I FORGOT TO REFRESH MY DEFENSE ELIXIR BC I HAD GOTTEN UP AND FORGOT IT WAS ALMOST OUT

JESUS FUCK

im so fucking annoyed lmao i was so close

oh well at least now i can use that whole mount

aaand again

oh. im out of ice arrows.

YIKES i forgot to refresh my thing again just for a sec and almost died

YES i got a perfect dodge purely on accident NICE!!!!

i can see everything from shatterback point, even naydra, but im too scared to jump while the beast is down there

no yk what fuck it. im turning this paraglider around

first tho i really wanna wait to see if i can catch another rainbow...they were so pretty and i lost the other pics i took when i died ):

oh!!! there it is!!!!! and i was just about to give up

ah it last such a short time - but it comes at the same time every day, around 4:05

i'm sure it won;t appear here anymore after the divine beasts knocks it off with the water though, haha

okay.......time to dive

/saves first

AHAHAHA I DID IT

WOW THAT THING IS SO HUGE UP CLOSE BYE

i mean it didnt even move im just Scared. ok

duuude i gave the lynel pic to the lady and got swim pants?! FUCKING SICK where do i get a helm

okay time to go free the divine beast!!

haha wait i came out here without defense stuff. i didn't cook anymore

oh well yolo

or actually this is a game so i live as many times as i want #determination

i do still have some extra hearts left, and stamina, and some healing items, and even some electricity elixirs, sowow!! okay! still huge!!!!!

ah i love sidon so much

he tries so hard and he's so ready and he loves his people so dearly

i bet he's gonna die lol

if it's like, a sage thing, maybe he has to replace mipha if she really is gone

jesus please don't die sidon PLEASE

OH MY GOD I GET TO RIDE ON HIS BACK?

JFC THIS MUSIC IS SO COOL!!!! AAAAKDSHFGKLJ

OH MY GOD HE'S TALKING!!! IN THE FIGHT!!!!! IM CRYING THIS IS SO COOL SKDFHBG

oh my gos he's talking he's talking there's voice acting im literally dying i cant handle!!!!!! this!!!!!! i lvoe him so much

omg omg

dude that was SO cool

and link got to ride on his back and then say goodbye!!! and sidon BELIEVES in him!!!!!!!!!!

god i wish i had gotten the helm before i did this haha i looked up the location but i don't think i can back out now

MIPHA?

MIPHA IS TALKING TO ME??

I CAN HEAR MIPHA'S VOICE

I'M CRYING I KNEW SHE WAS STILL ALIVE

i feel like she's about to die like the old man like Move On but

to see her again!!!!!!! im so emotional

oh my god oh my god

no okay i can leave and i need a second too im gonna go get the helm

apparently theres a quest you can do that doesnt give you the helm but tells you where to find it? but i can do that later rn i just want complete armor

alright nice full set hell yeah

HOLY fuck i was paragliding back and i tried to paraglide over the divine beast and it fucking OBLITERATED ME jesus CHRIST

dude there are these absolutely freaky eyeball things you gotta shoot to get rid of gunk and the music gets all creepy near them lsdksjfgh

oh no i found the cockpit but it's all closed up...is her corpse in there? her ghost? oh my god it says the terminals are unactivated

i'll be honest im a BIT stuck here i hate to have to use a guide, but

NO wait oh my god my runes!!! dumbass

i can lift the bars lol

oh my god the CONTROLS are on???

I CAN MOVE IT?? HOLY SHIT

this map is fucking 3D a 3D map!!!! in the other games they were flat holy shit!!!!

i can even see it moving on the minimap!!! holy FUCK

LMAO i was trying to move this crank with stasis and all along i needed to use magnesis. jesus

uh the music got freaky as fuck after i did the first terminal??? no?? thank you????

LOL YOU GOTTA RIDE THE TRUNK oh my god. oh my god.jesus christ

i am so small. it is so big. oh my god

I FEEL UNSAFE!

who is the boss of this dungeon? there's gotta be a boss

don't tell me i fight it

or the undead mipha

jesus god

i have had to ride this trunk 3 times now and i am not at all comfortable

reminds me of the big windmill in mirror's edge

okay yep i did all the terminals and now the music is downright terrifying!!! nice good Okay

HOLY FUCK WHAT IS THAT BLUE LIGHT

MIPHA?

NOT MIPHA!!!

"my demise 100 years ago" is she Really gone

omg no mipahs talking to me as i fight!!!

im straight up gonna look up what to do im too weak and defense-potionless to do this the hard way

ooh motherfucker doesnt like my shock arrows and lynel bow ahaha

huh that was actually like SUPER easy compared to some of the other stuff i've done

eeeewwwwww

MIPHA? ARE YOU ALIVE OR DEAD IN THERE? oh god oh god

holy fuck

i straight up just cried

she's a spirit and i thought she was gonna like, move on? which is sad enough

but no she's hanging around to pilot the divine beast from the afterlife

she even talked to it i was so sad it's been her only companion for a century of course she fucking talks to it

and i was staying strong!!! i was!!!!!

but she talked about how she wished she could see her dad again and i cried lmao why does this game give me dad feels of all things

i hope she gets to see her dad one more time too i'm so sad she's really dead and not alive like link

jesus fuck

oooh dorephan's talking about the master sword...gimme gimme gimme!!!

aww he was nice to sidon as everyone should be!!!!

holy shit he's really big?? i didn't realize it but he's like twice link's height JESUS

man. i am fucking wrecked lol

time to...explore...the rest of the province...i guess

i got a trident but i can never use it bc it will break. it was mipha's!!!!

on the other hand all three pieces of armor, my shield, weapon, AND bow are all zora themed i took a pic of myself to remember it by lol bc they will all break

i wonder where i should go after this...?

my brother went up to death mountain but i kinda want to do something different so we have something to tell each other about

but i kinda want to do the same so we don't spoil each other

i also REALLY wanna do the southeastmost province for some reason, all that water

tbh tho im getting ahead of myself i still have lots of this left to cover

it's getting harder to tell where i've already been, haha - when the things had borders and there was less visible that was easier

ooooh mipha's ability brings me back from death and she speaks briefly to me ;_; and it's active again in 23 minutes nice!

so i guess each champion gives you a different one and you can chose which to have active but tbh this one seems like it's gonna be the most helpful already

aww i did a little quest in kakariko to root out a theif and i love the way they built up dorian's past that's so cool

i think i was supposed to be able to pick up that yiga dude's sword tho and it glitched on me bc i was too fast :/

ugh i'm doing this oen shrine puzzle where you have to mount a male deer

and i finally mounted one after losing 10000 times and it was past some hills it wouldn't climb down

every time i find one thats close enough they fucking bolt im so fed up :|

and my sheikah sensor isn't picking up any more so i must have literally scared away all of them. fantastic. what a huge waste of time!! guess i will go somewhere else!

also can't solve the puzzle on how to open the shrine at veiled falls so im just batting a thousand today so much for sidequesting tbqh

FOUND A BLUE MANED LYNEL

SO MUCH NOPE

urgh and a blue hinox

exploring might not be worth my time either tbh

yeah no that's two shrines i haven't been able to open and this has stopped being fun, got one more ridge to explore before im done with this province - and some weird islands waaaay out there too but idk if i can get to them yet, and i'd just as soon wait until i unlocked the one next to them

yyyeah looking at them from here it makes much more sense to explore them when i get to that province

at least im all done with this one!! still plenty of sidequests and stuff, but those i can come back t more easily...it's harder to remember which terrain i have and haven't covered when i don't do it like this

i was thinking about how big the divine beast was when i saw it in the distance and

this sounds nuts but i bet im right - what if that flying island thing is a divine beast. WHAT IF

and that is The Day's Liveblog, more tomorrow, except probably not much bc of stream

[heartbroken-journals]

Nov. 16// 8:34 pm// 5 days after breakup.

Car ride home :

I talked out loud of what I would say if he would have wanted to talk to me. first I would hear out his apology (if there is one), and then follow up with thanking him for having the decency of doing so. I would then tell him that I am grateful for the last 5 years of our relationship. both the good and the bad. it wasn't always bad, in fact, we had SO MANY memories and him and I shared, that I couldn't have ever shared with anyone else. we took risks from the very beginning, and even ended our relationship with a risk. I would ask him if there was something that I could have done better, if there was a way for me to fix any of my errors. then I would tell him how I knew that he loved me, but he just didn't know how. I would tell him that I needed more, and I took screen shots of some of our old messages where he says he wants to change and where he acknowledges his errors. I appreciate that about him, he is always there to listen and never shuts me out. I would thank him for giving me the opportunity to see what being in a relationship this long would be like and for the adventures. I would also thank him for bringing zeus into my life. he is like a son to me, and will always be. its not his fault that his parents are breaking up, and I hope that I can still be part of his life. 

I would probably end with telling him that I want to be friends with him and remain in each others life, I feel like we owe it to ourselves to do that. and then tell him I want the rest of my stuff back that I left at his house. 

never thought id be single again, never thought id have to start over. but here I am, doing just that. it’ll get better, and I know that. this is just the beginning of my new life, but this is also my new chance at a real love, a real commitment, a serious relationship. 

all I gotta say is that I'm deserving of so much more. I want a man who is going to be obsessed with me, never hide me, never be ashamed of me, always wanting to show me off, and someone who will chose me everyday for the rest of their lives. I want someone who takes initiative, someone who is going to sweep me off my feet. someone who I don't have to guide through an entire relationship. I'm such an amazing gf. any man would be so lucky to date me. I'm such a good time, but I also got goals in life, I know what I want and what I don't want. my ex fucked up big time. as a matter of fact, all of my ex’s fucked up. have any of them ended up with a girl like me? NOPE. I've always been over the top. I have so much love to give and I refuse to waste it on people who aren't going to appreciate it. 

yeah, I still love my ex, I'm still I love with him and that won't just go away like that. its going to take time. but I can't just sit at home crying for someone who isn't going to come back, and who most likely won't change. 

but what if he does come back? what if he wants to get back together?

if that's the case, he will have to jump through fire for me to prove to me that he has in fact changed, he would have to apologize to my family for the damage he has caused us, and he would have to work 100x harder to get to where we want to be. 

it sounds unrealistic to be honest. its sad actually. if he really was in love with me, truly, none of this would have happened. 

life man. life has a way of throwing a curve ball at you, to teach you a lesson, but also to tell you he’s not the one, or he's not the one right now. he lost the girl of his dreams. 

now he’s going to have to go through life thinking of what could have been, what life is like without me. he’s going to fuck other girls, probably won't use protection, he’s going to get something maybe, or even get someone pregnant if he hasn't already. 

im also curious as to why he hasn't changed his fb profie picture or even deleted my picture off his instagram? maybe he’s not ready to tell the world? idk. maybe he’s trying to hurt me? I mean I know he went to salsa club last night and he wasn't ashamed to post about it. 5 days after a break up and he seems to be doing fine. 

I think about the response he said to my sister about him being ashamed to his core, and wants to take it all back. was that the truth? it felt like it at first but now I feel like he’s moved on to a “fuck it” “yolo” phase. idk. 

I still cry, but I don't cry because I want him back. I cry because it hurts to have to think about be loving another man, me wasting 5 years of my life on someone who was just going to do this to me. THATS WHY I CRY. 

shit sucks. 

im thankful for friends who are there for me, for my support system, for everyone who has heard me out, especially my dog. she’s heard a lot. 

I'll get through it. I know I will. I promise. I'm bigger than this. I got this.