#idk why im so invested since it literally does not matter tho

[llycaons]

'prestige' is a bullshit and arbitrary signifier for tv shows and yet I (not a film critic, have a tenuous and hyperspecific grasp on media critique) have the delusion that I personally can determine prestige status

[supportive-editor]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Meme.

Mun & Muse

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

tagged by: no one! I wanted to do this myself-- asjfsdh, AND ADVERTISE SHIBU HEHEHEHE >:D tagging: @coffee-stains-and-migraines @jestersclowns @iustitia-punientis  @jesterofinaba @booksilent​  u guys dont have to do it tho wwww

MY MUSE IS:   canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless / complicated. ( basically a minor npc that showed up in maruki’s confidant and was introduce as a friend of his?? i just grabbed the man and made him some sort of canon-oc)

IS YOUR CHARACTER POPULAR IN THE FANDOM?:   YES / NO / MAYBE ( probably amoung maruki stans aka me n like 3 people on this site)

IS YOUR CHARACTER CONSIDERED HOT™ IN THE FANDOM?   YES / NO / IDK. (again, maruki stans-- AKA ME n 3 PEOPLE)

IS YOUR CHARACTER CONSIDERED STRONG IN THE FANDOM?   YES / NO / IDK. 

ARE THEY UNDERRATED?  YES / NO / IDK. (hey a/tlus u cant just make this guy show up for 2 scenes aND NOT GIVE US BACKSTORY .)

WERE THEY RELEVANT FOR THE MAIN STORY?   YES / NO 

WERE THEY RELEVANT FOR THE MAIN CHARACTER?   YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG. ( spoilers tho!!! id say like kinda relevant but also kinda not )

ARE THEY WIDELY KNOWN IN THEIR WORLD?   YES / NO.

HOW’S THEIR REPUTATION?   GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL. 

HOW STRICTLY DO YOU FOLLOW CANON?: HE’S A BLANK SLATE MY CANON NOW HUEHUEUEHUEHUEHUHEUEHUEHUHEUHEUHEUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHE. In all seriousness, I’ve only revolved his canon with Maruki and Rumi aka being a friend of theirs. While Maruki says they’ve met in college, I say they’ve been friends since high school! 

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka: try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.   —  @ Adult muses in their late 20s and 30s, Wanna Join an Emo-Metal Band? Also, do you want embarrassing secrets about MarukI? DO YOU LIKE DOGS? ESPECIALLY FAT SHIBA INUS? DO YOU LIKE FORMER-DELINQUENTS? ALSO DO YOU LIKE TIRED OFFICE WORKERS WHO ALSO HAPPENED TO BE LEADERS OF AN INDIE EMO METAL BAND!? AND THEN MISTER TATSUO SHIBUSAWA IS THE GUY FOR YOU!!!!!

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?) -- Honestly, he kinda seems like a boring office worker if you first meet him. Also he’s literally an npc-- Who only interacts with like 1% of the casts. So people might find it hard to connect with him. Unless we plot like a relationship!!! Then we can work on that!

WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO RP YOUR MUSE?   —   His stupidly handsome face showed up in Maruki’s confidant and I’ve been bewitched ever since. Also, he looks like an older version of the FC I have for him! Who happens to be a huuuge comfort character! I also have an Akira-- So I kinda wanted to experiment with Shibusawa! And well, with the help with some close friends and various inspiration from various games and anime of making this weird canon-oc, I’m pretty happy with him!

WHAT KEEPS YOUR INSPIRATION GOING?   —   If people say they like him and wanna keep interacting with him!! Esp... if they wanna befriend him in some way....

SOME PERSONAL QUESTIONS FOR THE MUN Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

DO YOU THINK YOU GIVE YOUR CHARACTER JUSTICE?   YES / NO / I SINCERELY HOPE I DO? (idek man im probably the only shibu out there jafds)

DO YOU FREQUENTLY WRITE HEADCANONS?   YES / NO / SORT OF (It’s technically canon since hes just.. an oc ! So anything i say goes >:3c )

DO YOU SOMETIMES WRITE DRABBLES?   YES / NO 

DO YOU THINK A LOT ABOUT YOUR MUSE DURING THE DAY?   YES / NO (I told u, I am bewitched by an NPC who shows up for 3 scenes )

ARE YOU CONFIDENT IN YOUR PORTRAYAL?   YES / NO / SORT OF ( NOT EVERYONE IS GONNA LIKE HIM I GUESS )

ARE YOU CONFIDENT IN YOUR WRITING?   YES / NO / A LITTLE BIT ( when inspiration strikes! I tend to repeat a lot of phrases tho. I hate that. )

ARE YOU A SENSITIVE PERSON?   YES / NO / SORTA.

DO YOU ACCEPT CRITICISM WELL ABOUT YOUR PORTRAYAL?   —   If it’s constructive yeah! again, Shibu is just a weird canon-oc. 

DO YOU LIKE QUESTIONS, WHICH HELP YOU TO EXPLORE YOUR CHARACTER?   — ABSOLUTELY!!!!!! I want to give as much character development for this guy.... 

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES TO A HEADCANON OF YOURS, DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY? -- This doesn’t apply to me lmao. 

IF SOMEONE REALLY HATES YOUR CHARACTER, HOW DO YOU TAKE IT? — I’ve had like one instance because of his association with Maruki. But I won’t get into detail about it. HOWEVER, if you don’t like him, the unfollow button is right there! 

ARE YOU OKAY WITH PEOPLE POINTING OUT YOUR GRAMMATICAL ERRORS?   —  I point out my own and fix it instantly because it’s embarrassing. 

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE EASY GOING AS A MUN? — I’d like to think so! I’m just very shy and very BAD at communication. d;kfjkalsdfj, ive been told way too many times I seem intimating BUT I CAN ASSURE YOU, I am just as intimidated as you are.  

[extreme-technicality]

i read ur entire ninjago post and now im lowkey invested,,, tell me abt ur daughter rumi

*evil laughter* yesssss, join meeeeee~~~

OKAY BUT MY EVIL DAUGHTER RUMI THO

She has like, fairly good motivations for Being Evil (as far as evil backstories go), and honestly if the writers had LET HER LIVE it could’ve been SO interesting, but I’m getting ahead of myself lmao. She was orphaned off-screen at the end of s1, and got adopted by the Ninjago Royal Family shortly after (why does ninjago have a royal family? who fucking cares lmao). BUT, she grew up hating the ninja because she blames them for her parents deaths. And since Garmadon was the one who actually killed the thing that killed her parents, he’s the only acceptable parental substitute in her mind. Basically, this poor girl has a lot of unprocessed grief and trauma and is coping as best she can - well, ish. She was actively choosing to manipulate literally everyone around her and attempting to bring back Lord Garmadon in his most evil form in order to enact her vengeance against the ninja specifically, but some people do that to COPE

And when I say she was manipulating everyone, I mean she was manipulating EVERYONE. Her parents, the staff, the other ninja - she played Lloyd like a fiddle at the start of s8, and the first hint we got was when she and Lloyd were having their heart-to-heart in s8e2(? I think). They were bonding over the stresses of their positions as leaders and the various masks they’ve had to wear and lay down, and Rumi mentions she has to spend most of her days in a mask. On the first watch, I took it at pretty much face value - she’s a princess, there’s a certain image and reputation she has to maintain, the mask she has to wear, and yeah maybe she likes girls instead of guys and that’s one more thing hidden under a mask, yknow? But once you find out that she’s SPEARHEADING the evil organization working to resurrect Garmadon, THAT CONVERSATION HAS SO MUCH MORE DEPTH!!!!! Honestly, the Rumi reveal is the best ninjago twist (imo) because it’s ASTONISHINGLY well-written!! There’s a few signs in the episodes leading up to the reveal, but they’re so subtle that unless you knew what you were looking for you wouldn’t see them!!!!!!! AND THEN THE DELIGHT ON HER FACE WHEN SHE COULD FINALLY SHED THE LAST OF HER MASKS AND WORK TO BRING GARMADON BACK AND HATE THE NINJA, LLOYD INCLUDED, OPENLY??? ABSOLUTELY UNMATCHED, MY BOY LLOYD WAS GETTING HIS HEART SHATTERED AND I FELT FOR HIM BUT ALSO SHE BECAME MY DAUGHTER IN THAT MOMENT AND SHE STILL IS

Also, there’s a lot about masks in the season - the monologuing from Rumi, plus the macguffins of the arc are three Oni masks: the Mask of Delusion, the Mask of Rage, and the Mask of Vengeance. The moment Rumi unmasks herself is also the moment she takes the Mask of Vengeance for herself, and if I had more brain power I would ABSOLUTELY analyze the FUCK out of that symbolism but I CANT RIGHT NOW AND AAAAAAAAAA

anyway lmao

Another thing I really liked was that Lloyd pointed out that she had a support network available to her, if she wanted it - doubtless the Emperor and Empress of ninjago could’ve gotten her therapy, she was in a stable environment, there were a NUMBER of people who loved and wanted to help her, but she CHOSE to stay rooted in her pain and trauma. She still deserved help!! But her ACTIONS were the problem, because she CHOSE those willingly, and the narrative points that out.

Regardless, she brings Garmadon back and he’s evil and heartless and they’re a perfect pair, honestly, he adopts her in a fashion during s9 and honestly it’s kinda sweet. I CRAVE fics where she lived and disappeared with her gf and Garmadon after s10 and they kinda fuck off for a bit, healing and becoming a Family (that does crime together on the weekend but shhhh) until Lloyd and the other ninja find them and go “oh hey ur our family too now, deal with it 😎”. UN FUCKING FORTUNATELY, she died and I’m high key mad about it!!!! Picture this: Lloyd and Garmadon are having another city-destroying fight, and Rumi goes “fuck this shit I’m OUT” and dips. She’s going through a building and comes across a family going through the exact same situation that resulted in her parents dying and her path to vengeance. She opts to save that family, and she gets a fucking BUILDING collapsed on her in thanks!!!! BRO OKAY LIKE I GET THE SYMBOLISM THEY WERE GOING FOR, BREAK THE CYCLE AND END VENGEANCE OR WHATEVER, BUT IT WOULDVE BEEN SO MUCH MORE POWERFUL IF SHE HAD SAVED THE PARENTS, THAT LITTLE GIRL, AND HERSELF IN THE PROCESS!!!! SHE GETS THEM OUT, IT LOOKS LIKE SHE DIED, TURNS UP AT THE END OF THE SEASON AND GOES TO THERAPY, SURVIVES S10 AND THEN FUCKS OFF WITH GARMADON TO REMEMBER HOW TO BE A FAMILY!!!!! IM GOING FERAL THINKING ABOUT WHAT RUMI COULDVE BEEN BRO!!!! SHE WAS ALREADY SO GOOD AND THEN THEY JUST!!! DROPPED HER!!!!!!!!!! AND I DONT THINK IM EVER GONNA NOT BE MAD ABOUT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY EVIL DAUGHTER DESERVED BETTER AND I WILL NOT SHUT UP ABOUT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ESPECIALLY since just about every season after she dies, there’s SOME reference to how hurt Lloyd is that she’s gone, or how badly she fucked him up, and basically just dragging out that fake forced romance longer than it kinda should’ve been dragged out. Literally none of that matters!!!! Or, it does, but not NEARLY as much as Rumi’s squandered potential matters!!!! And honestly I just think it would’ve been a much better dynamic if Lloyd and Rumi had gone from “hey I thought we were dating but you tried to kill me” and “I hate your fucking guts and blame you for the deaths of my parents :)” to “siblings who irritate the CRAP out of each other but are low key ride-or-die”. Let them be SIBLINGS for fucks SAKE

Oh I didn’t really talk about her gf did I?? Well one of Rumi’s underlings is a punk biker named UltraViolet and like, none of it was TEXT, but Rumi and UltraViolet DEFINITELY had something going on. I choose to interpret it as evil lesbians because I think it’s what they deserve, but that’s just me lmao (and I’m right)

Ooh no WAIT, UltraViolet got yeeted to prison post-s9, and honestly if Rumi has lived I think she would’ve faced the same fate (still, she needs therapy at SOME point), so in my personal canon the first thing Garmadon does after fucking off post-s10 is he busts Rumi and UV out of jail and then they like. Idk. Travel or something. Discover the meaning of family. Go to therapy together (how many times can I say therapy in a single post??? Let’s Find Out). Fucking LIVE dude, I just want them to be HAPPY

[lupihero]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; mun & muse - meme.

tagged by: @bxstiae​ thank u!! tagging: anyone who wants to do this ♡

fill out & repost ♥ this meme definitely favors canons more, but i hope oc’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. multi-muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

My muse is:   canon / oc / au ( has au verses ) / canon-divergent / fandomless

Is your character popular in the fandom?  YES / NO.

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

Is your character considered strong in the fandom? YES / NO / IDK.

Are they underrated?  YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main story?  YES / NO / MAYBE.

Were they relevant for the main character?  YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG.

Are they widely known in their world?  YES / NO / MAYBE.

How’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.

How strictly do you follow canon?  —  pretty strictly. tbh i think i could do with a little more canon-divergence but i usually focus pretty hard on canon and diverging too far in my own muses, unless they were poorly written, tends to bother me.

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.  —  need a sweet country boy with a heart of gold who loves hard and fast and considers everyone he loves as part of his family ? how about a boy that can kick your ass to the sacred realm and back with his bare hands and a dizzying amount of strength ? how about a big friendly wolf that really doesn’t act all that much like a wolf but is big and soft and a really nice companion ? a boy that carries on and sees the best in people despite his trauma ? a boy who’s an absolute fucking dork and loses his mind whenever he sees a cat ? will smith poses @ link

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?).   —  he’s the protagonist, he’s too nice, too likable, and he might be, from some perspectives, super overpowered. a lot of his flaws are issues that come with a lot of protagonist characters, like selflessness to a fault, recklessness, a desire to help no matter the cost, etc., and it might come across as overdone or unoriginal for someone like him.

What inspired you to rp your muse?  —  twipri has been my favorite video game of all time since i first played it the xmas after it came out, when i was 7. it was an unbelievably huge influence on my life, and got me through a whole lot of shit i’d have to go through up until i was a teenager. it was a constant for me, a comfort. and link, being the protagonist, was of course the center of it. i connected to him really hard, and becoming him whenever i played the game was like magic to me as a kid. honestly, i dont know why i didnt write him until this year, because he’s been such an easy headspace for me to slip into for years. ig i just figured it was about time? id already written both tp zel and midna at separate points, so it was only right to complete the trio ksjfgh

What keeps your inspiration going?  —  the game itself, its soundtrack, art, linked universe and its little fandom, and you guys! just seeing all of your posts and your passion for loz and its characters helps fuel the love i have for it too!

Some more personal questions for the mun.

give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

Do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO.

Do you frequently write headcanons? YES / NO. ( i have. built up a lot of hcs about this boy over the years )

Do you sometimes write drabbles?  YES / NO. ( i usually do write drabbles every now and then, idk why i haven’t for link yet )

Do you think a lot about your Muse during the day?  YES / NO.

Are you confident in your portrayal?   YES / NO. ( hmm i mean. i think i am, anyway?? i like the way i portray him, but i guess im sorta insecure about whether or not yall like my portrayal lmao )

Are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO. ( more or less, it depends on the day. back when i was a Gifted Kid my Gift was writing, and i was literally always chosen to read things i wrote aloud at school assemblies and things, so i. very much have a love / hate relationship w it )

Are you a sensitive person?  YES / NO. ( i mean. i try really hard not to be but :’^) )

Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?  —  tbh, i don’t know?? i usually do with other muses, but bc twi is very special to me i have literally no idea how well i would take it. of course, if u do have criticism ( of the constructive sort, of course ), i still welcome it

Do you like questions, which help you explore your character?  —  yes!!! if you ever have anything you wanna know about twi and the way i write him, please ask!!!

If someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why?  —  nope. unless it’s in the context of sharing hcs back and forth and building on each other or part of a friendly conversation, i don’t want to hear why you think i’m wrong. i still think about that personal that rb’d a hc i made a month or so ago and put in the tags all the reasons they disagreed w me and i wish i didn’t bc i hate it

If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it?  —   i?? dunno??? i guess i’d just tell them to unfollow. i’m not here to write link the way you think he should be written, i’m here to write him the way i want to.

If someone really hates your character, how do you take it?  —  hkljfg does anyone hate link??? like. he’s link. he’s neutral at worst. but it’s not my business if someone hates him, so to each their own ig

Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?  —  mm i don’t mind it, but i don’t really see the point. rp is a form of writing that doesn’t need much editing, and when it does, we are our own editors, so of course we’re going to make mistakes and overlook them. english is a complicated and hard language, and typos/misspellings/grammar errors happen and it’s not a big deal

Do you think you are easy going as a mun?   —  yes!! i’m a very laid-back person in general i think, and of course i have things i won’t tolerate and i’ll speak up when i need to, but at the end of the day rp is a hobby, and it’s something we do to have fun, and i know that having fun is the most important part of doing this. though, sometimes i think my anxiety & fear of confrontation might make me a little too lenient on things like my own rules tho kjfhg 

that’s about it, congrats for filling out!

[timextoxhajima]

IT WAS NUS! HAHAHAHHA and YES im glad someone can relate to that kind of feeling HAHAH and the 4 test and 3 submission in 7 days sounds so much like hell,,,

IM SO SORRY i actually feel so had for being such a coward and wanting to keep my identity so private,,, its just that i'm so used to keeping my fangirl and real life separate,, i used to didnt follow any of my irl friends on twt bc i was too scared to show my fangirling life, ( i dont even know why too),,, it was only until recently that i started allowing my irl friends to follow me on twitter, but i'm just not ready to do the same on tumblr,,, i know we are not irl friends but i feel like i've told u pretty a lot about myself and if some of my irl friends saw this they may know who it is???? does this even make sense? i know im just being extra,,,, but i still really hope we can be friends🥺🥺 i'd totally hit u up someday when i feel ready (I KNOW THIS IS SO EXTRA BUT I MEAN THIS HAHAHAH)

well,, it does sounds complicated,, you must've had it pretty hard yourself. i dont really know what advice i should say, but since it doesnt make you attached to each other, and you have a crush on someone else (especially bc it kinda make you feel bad now) you could,, you know,,, end it? i dont even know if this is the right advice bc I KNOW it must be so complicated and i cant even imagine how you must be so confused bc its not even a real relationshiop and even i cant help but wonder,, how would u actually end it? im sorry if this wasnt such a good advice i just truly wish you'll get trhu this🥺🥺 pls take care of ur own well being (by this i didnt mean just physically but also mentally)

and just to be sure i'd like to tell you that I DONT think you are a shitperson hahah i swear im just not that kind of person who just gives judgement to anyone,, i just never feel like i have the right to,, not to mention that you actually feel bad about it yourself so ofcourse i'd never have the heart to actually think bad about you, so dont worry!

i actually did a counselling practice today at school and idk but maybe because of it i feel like i really need to give you an advice that might actually help and im so sorry bc i dont think i did ? HAHAH i just really wish you can feel better soon tho <3 -🍋🍋

i actually have friends in nus med, and two of them are a couple hehe and yes 4 tests and 3 submissions in a day is very very close to hell. 

it’s alright about your identity! it took me VERY long to decide to even tell my close friends that I'm a fanfic writer. i started writing in 2014 and the first person i told was my boyfriend in 2016. but now because im taking so many modules on writing and filming, it becomes natural for me to share that i already have experience from writing fanfiction so it takes time! don’t feel pressured to reach out to me on a friend-basis instead of a writer-reader, i’ve only made actual friends (ie exchanging instagrams, phone numbers and discords) with two people here. trust takes time to build so i totally understand.

well, he’s not a very good texter and neither does he initiate meetings so right now im just holding myself back from advancing/initiating a talk. im just letting the whole situation rest as it was, cause ngl i was feeling like i was being used bec im always the friend that reaches out and not him so now im just refraining from going out of my way to make sure he’s alright. sounds a bit mean but if he doesn’t care despite me putting in my past efforts then why should i care anymore right? so i would say instead of ending it, im just gonna let it die down, im literally gna fuck off from his life cause it just feels like im not important simply as a friend anyway. 

yeah icb i have a crush on someone else UGH like i know it doesn't matter in any large scale i just hate it when i develop feelings for someone, even in the most minute way because it makes me feel like i cant go a day without investing in someone like, invest in yourself- bitch?? [saying this to myself ofc]

[brothalynchhung]

2017 overview

FOR FUCKS SAKEEE IVE BEEN DOING THIS FOR 5 YEARS LMFAOOOO anyways lets goo... this gone be a lot i learned a lot this year

the year started out...

kinda weird tbh like i was in a weird state

i was back to being obsessed following jk/gl lool

it was nice but i got to hopelessly obsessed

but they came back and it really motivated me it made me happy

hes so comforting until this day

he earned so much!! achieved so much! I'm so happy for him

i gained a lot this year too .. in a way

yeah 2017 was weird introspectively...

lot of internal rebuilding...

i did video 1 which was fun i got to make some cool shit and work hard on projects

i met my girl xy lol her talented ass

ate out a lot tbh i was a fatass beginning of 2017 wtf

still am tho wtf who am i kidding 🙄🙄🙄

jus classes with z as usual but winter 2017 was so weird cuz like.. i barely went to any of those classes LOL

video 1 was fun

adv com theories was ass idk how i got a B+ in that class i failed everything LMFAOO

phi was whatever

women and media was weird cuz of that weird girl but we got a good mark so whatever

quantitative LMFAOOO fuck that class and that bitch ass prof i didnt learn shit

other than that personally...i was going through some mental shit.. i felt alone. i felt out of it. i felt regretful

i felt so regretful i felt like shit

i fell into such a nostalgic moment like i just missed everything

jk kinda reminded me of like.. how i was? happy? in 2016 i kinda of left everything and secluded myself in a weird way other than fighting with ayt/mh on some bullshit i just was out of it.. i was chilling with weirdos lol

i was thinking like.. i miss how it is??? I'm not that different? i like all the people from my past why are we not that close

spring day came out.. that hit it. bullseye. 

childish gambinooo....

just really looking back, looking back on who i AM who I WANT to be truly. who i really want to be around and create

i valued my friendships

i was super creative... working on my book, investing in artistic pursuits.. 

i wanted to recreate everything i lost, i wanted to reclaim my trauma with that bitch.

i got to spend fun times with my friends, running around train tracks becoming closer again like how it should have been all along

jk had me looking forward to leaving to dubai

and so i did. 

i tried chasing him there but it didnt really work out

its not really meant to be sr...

he's just an inspiration for what you want and for who u are

the whole groups a blessing lol

even tho i left that shit cuz it got too much and too weird why bitches gotta make shit mediocre🙄

anyways dubai was kinda ass but i got to realize something important... who i miss, who i wanted/wished were with me, who actually cares about me..

WHO ACTUALLY CARES ABOUT ME

yo sr... if someone really cares.. they'll take the effort. STOP chasing people who don't care.. STOP damaging yourself and the people who love u for people who don't give a fuck

i dropped that bitch so hard i hope she fucking rots in hell

2017 . APRIL 2017 LAST TIME EVER I WILL EVER SEE THIS BITCH. NEVER AGAIN.

my life got so much better.

dubai was a detox but after i came back it was so good

hot as fuck

ramadan lol

fat as fuck -_-

dubai was just weird lol kinda realized its not my place but it was nice(ish)

need to learn not to rely so much on material shit lol

my family is the best

they really tryna teach u and care for u, u will never have another family.

also met nr!!! she was sweet kinda weird tho lMAO the cat shit jesus lol 

misk lol

WENT TO LONDON IT WAS AMAZING I LOVED IT

but fuck... lmao u know what the fuck u did yesterday -_- u DUMB bitch lmao who cares tho (...>_>)

came back... greeted by my friends who care 

chilled with them, adventures with them

but came back.. sorry. sorry to myself. sorry to the people i hurt

ayt, mh

i was thinking about it since winter i knew i had to make it right again, i knew i was wrong, that fucking bitch fucked shit up for us, we could have had so much memories in 2016 if shit didnt go sour

i gave the wrong person another chance they didnt deserve

so i reflected.. and swallowed my fucking pride

apologized. to who i needed to

and u know what? we good. like it was never bad. we good

...thats real. no flop shit, no fake shit, we good. loyalty. blessed.

u really gave the wrong bitch another chance u real did

stupid ass

then it was good.. adventures with my friends, rebuilding, forgetting, growing

together.

beach!! hiking!! badminton in the middle of the streets singing backstreet boys!! lol music!! 

KENDRICK LAMARRR

i made friends w ht again amazing lol

really remade friends w a lot of people lol

kendrick was so good tho fuck he was amazing my eyes were tearing/shining i cried like 5 times LOVE.. PRIDE. fuck those got to me

my ass saw get low live?? by YG fuck i love him too 

best night

amusement parks x3.. lol mtl with my fams..

yo me and lina got so close

i love my family. always.

NTCCCLMAOOOO 

they gave me so much hope after i dropped stb cuz or their weird ass fandom.. i couldn't deal with that shit they're ruining my damn nostalgia. but whatever I'm not gon hate on their success.. jk is still jk to me i hope he reaches the stars with his success

but yeah damn ntc made everything sooo good damn how u not have 1 dime but like 8 LMAO in one group

literally lights of my lifeee

jn😤jh😤hc🍅😩m😤jn😭jm😭WTF BITCH so much possibilities tf

love them they made me so happy

also their fandom is so funnny love the bitches i been following and talking to

anyways i saved up my money a lot but now its like all gone cuz nadas work so idk

UHMMMM I BOUGHT MMM??? WTF BITCH WTF

I WIN IDC I WIN fuck all these bitches

glow up glow the FUCK up

lost a lil weight.. probably gained it all back idk fuck me -.-

since fall 2017.. i been happy.. i got my friends..my groups..

rm, mc, ys💘 

nz,suz,lul,mar💖

prgl,sr,joan💞

hct!

nm💗

ayt

zainb,rame

xiny, jelly

and more...

hearts 4 all I'm just lazy lol

nice to have friends, nice to know there are people who actually like u and care for u and are fun to hang with, nice to know people like u for who u really are unconditionally 

nice to know bitches i hate will never NEVER have that

stay lonely pitiful boring unsuccessful and fake . 

priorities straight. emptying out ugly shit, rebuilding myself and who i am. having fun, fixing my look. investing

music music music GOOD MUSIC

movies movies movies

books books books

those 3 things will never change

unbrainwashing myself

realized so much shit.. istg my glow up is associated with freeing my mind from all this bullshit...

RATHER BE PROUD OF WHO I AM RATHER THAN TRY TO BE SOMETHING IM NOT JUST TO FIT INTO SOME LOWKEY RACIST UGLY BORING BULLSHIT

crazy how deep into my coma i was

BITCH IM BACK OUT OF MY COMA

going forward.. going forward.. investing.. changing... 

mentality shifting.. my image of diserable.. who i want to be 

better important goals, fun goals, fun shit, cool shit, new shit

destroying the fuck bitches who tried to kill me

bunch of fucking losers. 

I'm better now I'm happy now i ended 2017 happy as fuck

i DONT have my gl but i don't need him rn. I'm loved. i love me. my family and friends got me. so until i act on some long awaited shit and gain more resources and achieve more personally UNTIL I'm ready and deserve some shit. then ill get gl. I'm going towards him. 

you're with me.. even when you're away.

hope u feel all this happiness too, hope you're warm, hope you know I'm not where u are right now and hope ur working your way towards me too

ill meet u in the warm .

happy. i spent many nights happy no fights no drama no sadness (other than not having gl i get hopeless being in love with someone i don't know yet but i cant help it)

soon tho dw.. it 2018 now lol

anyways!! i grew so much in 2017 I'm back to who i really am I'm motivated I'm happy I'm inspired I'm ready for the next year

i ended this year losing my bitch ass acne studios scarf!! like a dumb bitch!! so I'm still a dumb bitch!! but who cares -.-

need so stop buying dumb shit.. ill get the trousers when i get a job and the fucking scarf won't matter.. yo ass don't even like scarfs wtf -_-

lool see this optimistic dgaf mentality.. 

CAASH DONT LAST MY FRIENDS WILL RIDE FOR ME

and thats exactly what we did tonight, dance and sing to disney hits and sean paul . happy and careless af 

I GOTTED WHAT I WANTED RIGHT NOWWW 

GOD DOES IT FEEL SO GOOOOD

2018 lets fucking go. I'm ready . I'm going to make so much shit. I'm out my coma, i know what the fuck i want . no more dumb shit, we do dis. LETS FUCKING GOOOO.