#idk why lately its so bad (LITERALLY identifies as genderFLUID...HERe comes the FLUID part of your gender)
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i wanna die im sorry gerard i let you down but this gender stuff is kicking my ass
#dysphoria is fucking flarring up#idk why lately its so bad (LITERALLY identifies as genderFLUID...HERe comes the FLUID part of your gender)#i literally dont know anymore but fucking honestly i wanna cry and i think my brain is like.... ok so we are done mourning our past self?#ok nice! NOW lets deal with transgenderism :)#litwrally just want to cry infact i am crying yhis hurts im scarwd#like i just. idk i dont wanna describe it but rather talk about how much it hurts#i think bc i stopped repressing it or normalizing it#like me saying im being overdramatic or whatever#after i stopped doing that its knocking so loudly at my door#and i dont even want to tell anyone i feel somewhat ashamed about this too#so many fucking steps back man#i couldve fully understood and embraced myself#if anyone needs triggers for this stuff pls lmk somehow bc im gonna probably keep discussing this#instead of like. me committing suicide at least LOL#but yea Um wow i need to maybe like. think more deeper into thi#this**#i might change my pronouns again jesus fucking christ fjdjdjfjfjvjvgjf#im punching and eat ing dry wall#edit changed my pronouns :} *loud explosion*
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