#if halbrand isn’t sauron what are we doing here

[apoloadonisandnarcissus]

"The Last Temptation": One Megathread to Rule Them All - Clues and Speculation, PART 3

9) How will Sauron prove his love for Galadriel?

We are back, and we are cracking the code here, we are cooking, and I want to thank @justacynicalromantic; @pearlstomyeyes and @historical-romances9, for their ideas, and with whom I wholesome agree. And there's foreshadowing to back it up.

In both Part 1 and Part 2, we already discussed some crucial points leading to “The Last Temptation” scene: (1) Sauron in love with Galadriel, (2) Galadriel having conflicted feelings for him in return and (3) her seek him out alone at the finale, and how the director of the finale, Charlotte Brändström teased on “X-Ray Vision” podcast:

I think Sauron even really loves Galadriel and you see that at the very end. 

The season seems to be building towards: 

Against all warnings, Galadriel will seek out Sauron alone at the finale; 

She’s ready to sacrifice herself (based on the visions of Nenya in 2x04, my bet is that Galadriel knows she’ll die in her duel with Sauron, but will go to fight him anyway);

She’ll 100% want to destroy Sauron, and there is no doubt in her mind (especially after seeing first-hand what he did to Celebrimbor, in 2x07).

Sauron will somehow prove he really loves Galadriel (to both her, and the audience).

The question is: how?

As I’ve mentioned on Part 2 of this megathread, I don’t think visions alone are enough to put this point across, because Sauron will always look/sound manipulative by showing Galadriel visions of Halbrand/“what could have been”/or whatever.

He can show her all the same, but I don’t think that will be *the* proof that he truly loves her, and that everything they shared before (when she believed him to be “just Halbrand”) wasn’t a deception on his part. 

Morgoth’s iron crown isn’t only a means to lure Sauron out or to used as a mere "sword", as we’ve seen on the trailers. And, as I’ve discussed in Part 2, my bet is Galadriel will try to test Adar’s theory that Morgoth’s iron crown + Nenya can destroy Sauron for good.

From this “Behind the Scenes” teaser, we know that Galadriel will get Nenya back, and has it during her fight with Sauron in 2x08. 

I already talked about this being Galadriel’s plan in Part 2, but I will develop it here. With that being said, and as @justacynicalromantic so brilliantly observed, Morgoth’s iron crown is not a MacGuffin, but the Chekhov’s gun of the plot. The iron crown is a very powerful object, infused with Dark magic (maybe Blood Magic even) who has the power to destroy Sauron’s physical form, as we’ve seen in 2x01.  

Now, prepare for strangeness and to be mind-blown because Morgoth's Iron crown is fatally wounding someone at the finale (coming full circle). And there will be some healing involved, to save this character’s life. Now, this sounds out of “Star Wars” (and I'm not sure if I’m a huge fan of this myself), but stay with me.  

In 2x04, we already saw that Nenya has powerful healing properties, when Galadriel saves Camnir from a fatal Orc arrow wound, before heading to fight the Orcs alone, and allowing Elrond & co. to escape back to Lindon and warn Gil-galad the Orc legions are marching towards Eregion.  

(This screenshot looks terrible because I had to up the brightness otherwise, we wouldn’t see anything).

We have two possible scenarios here: 

Either Galadriel stabs Sauron with the iron crown, regrets it, and heals Sauron; 

Or Galadriel accidentally scratches/stabs herself or Sauron does, with Morgoth’s iron crown during the fight, and is dying, but she’s healed by Sauron (hence proving his love for her). 

My main problem with being Sauron getting stabbed in this scenario: (1) we already saw that happening; and (2) it wouldn’t prove to the audience and to Galadriel that he’s actually in love with her. And I do believe Galadriel’s mindset going into this fight will be to destroy Sauron, and so I don’t see her regretting stabbing him, nor leaving him for dead.

My bet: Galadriel is the one who gets fatally wounded by Morgoth's Iron Crown.

This season, there’s already been a female character dying of poisoning by an Orc arrow (R.I.P. Bronwyn). And as Arondir explains to the audience, in 2x03, Orc arrows have a foul substance the flesh doesn’t forget (couldn’t find the actual quote). So: can this be foreshadowing?  

With Orc arrows the poison is slower (Bronwyn didn’t die right away), but what of Morgoth’s very crown? The Dark magic on it it’s 10000 times stronger. Meaning, a mere scratch can be enough to be fatal, even to an Elf. So, I can definitely see this mirroring Frodo’s Morgul wound from the “Fellowship of the Ring”, leaving Galadriel at the brink of death. 

Now, will Nenya come into play in this scenario?

I think it can go both ways, really. Because Sauron is a powerful Dark sorcerer on his own and he’s a servant of Morgoth, so he doesn’t exactly need Nenya to save Galadriel’s life. But maybe he’ll have to use it? The magic on the crown can be so strong, that Nenya’s power might have to come to the rescue (meaning Nenya's healing powers in 2x04 are also foreshadowing to this scene).

This would make Galadriel “touch the darkness” for real, because with Frodo the wound from the Morgul-blade never fully healed throughout the years. So what will happen to Galadriel if she does get stabbed by Morgoth’s iron crown, and is healed by Sauron himself? Unless the power of Nenya acts as counterbalance to this.

Can Elrond’s choice come into play in this scenario, as well? 

If Elrond isn't forced to make this choice in 2x07, I think this scene will be it (especially since fans have already noticed "Elrond’s theme" on the "Last Temptation theme").

Elrond can witness Galadriel get wounded by Morgoth’s Iron Crown and falling down, and have to face the choice between saving her life or stopping Sauron (in the future), just like he promised her in 2x04. And, in this scenario, he would eventually choose to save the Elves, and leave Galadriel for dead.

Where do we go from here? 

As I’ve already speculated in Part 2, I think Galadriel’s true feelings for Sauron will either be: (1) explicit portraited or (2) highly implied in this scene, and that’s why Magda Walma aka “the Polish reviewer” believes that Celeborn won’t ever in “Rings of Power” (he will, but I’m betting no earlier than Season 4 or even Season 5, to help Galadriel heal from all of this).

In this scenario, I can only see two possible outcomes, really: 

Either Galadriel willingly goes with Sauron at the end; 

Sauron goes away by himself, and leaves Galadriel behind, unarmed and saved (further proving his love for her). 

Either way, and even if these theories aren’t true, I think it’s safe to say we can expect an insane and highly emotional scene between Sauron and Galadriel at the finale. I don’t believe for a second, she’ll outright resist him again. It’s not what the season has been building up towards.

[liminal-zone]

Halbrand!Sauron/Galadriel is healing some huge reylo wounds I still carry. GRATEFUL.

In the third age, she is Not answering that boy’s FaceTime calls and he is screaming ‘blow that piece of junk out of the sky.’

[just-trying-to-fangirl-in-peace]

Galadriel x fem!Elf!reader

-> in which she sees you in her 2x02 vision instead of Celebrimbor

Warnings: angst, implied Sauron x reader

An immeasurable weight lifts itself off of Galadriel’s chest when she sees you there, safe and sound in Lindon. Your name leaves her lips as she stands from her brother’s grave.

“They did not tell me you had arrived.”

“Well, here I am,” you say softly. And so you are, but...

Something is not right. The guarded smile you give her does not quite reach your eyes. And whereas before you would not have hesitated to come to her and take her hand in yours, or even embrace her in joy of your reunion, now you make no move towards her at all.

Of course not. You must be cross, she thinks, and you have every right to be. For centuries on end you had fought by her side, believed in her even when no one else would. You were the only member of her company that had not turned against her in the mountains. You had not hesitated to leap into the ocean when she had.

And yet, despite all that, she could not find it in herself to be honest with you when she left you in Eregion. Even when you begged her to tell you what was plaguing her, the words would not leave her mouth.

Sauron is alive. You stood by his side and called him friend. Because of me.

Her shame had been too great. Rather than endure it, she had betrayed your trust. And now you will not come to her because the wound has not yet closed.

So she closes the distance between you instead, wrapping her arms around you the moment you are within reach.

“Forgive me,” she says in a trembling murmur, her regret mingling with relief as she feels you return her embrace. “I should not have left without telling you the truth. I should not have left without you.” She pulls away to look into your eyes. There is still care in your gaze, but now it is tainted by deep sorrow. Your name is heavy with regret on her lips as she says it once, twice, resting her hands on your upper arms as if to brace herself for what she must, at last, confess to you. “The reason why I acted like I did... The reason Halbrand left was because—”

“Because you discovered he was Sauron.”

Your voice is nothing but calm and understanding. Yet your words are a tidal wave, threatening to steal the ground from beneath Galadriel’s feet. Her eyes grow wide, her lips trembling. How do you know...?

Your hands settle beneath her elbows, like you are seeking to soothe her as you answer the question she hadn’t gotten to ask, “We’ve had an unexpected visitor in Eregion.”

“He has returned already?” she breathes out. There is no concealing the dread that chills her bones.

“Yes,” you nod once, “but you must not blame yourself. Had I known, it would have made no difference. I would still be standing here, as I am now.”

A half-sob escapes Galadriel’s throat. Yes, you are here, and you are unharmed. Yes, she knows you are as fierce in battle as she is and just as capable of protecting yourself, but to think how close you have come the Lord of Darkness, to a threat that might have been beyond your skill to escape, tears at her soul in ways she cannot bear.

“Had I lost you...” she murmurs.

“Oh, Galadriel,” you whisper. Your hand cups her cheek with utmost gentleness, catching a tear that had slipped from her eye. She leans into your touch, is painfully grateful for it. Your eyes shine with tears as well, carrying the same pain she feels as you speak. “You have lost me. All is lost.”

“No,” she shakes her head, willing fiery determination back into her limbs and heart as she grasps at your hand on her cheek. “No, it isn’t too late. It cannot be. We shall find the Enemy and—”

The words die in her throat. Because when she touched your hand, she found something that hadn’t been there before, and which at once demanded her attention. Her gaze drops to your hand, and she sees what it is that felt so cold and rough beneath her fingertips.

There is a ring on your finger. One with a gem black as the night, so dark it barely even reflects the sunlight. One she knows, deep in her bones, to be no ordinary ring.

One of his making.

She says your name again, this time in question. She knows the answers, but dares not ask. And you know she knows, but you tell her anyway.

“It is a Ring of Power. The very same as yours.”

“No, not like mine,” Galadriel is quick to deny, voice sharp with anger as well as fear for you. “The Three are free of his influence. Yours is tainted by the dark, poisoned by shadow. It will bring you nothing but ruin. Remove it, I beg you!”

But all that you remove is your hand from within her grasp, a small yet sharp movement which puts what feels like an insurmountable distance between you and her.

“I cannot,” you retort. You glance down at your Ring, and your voice softens. “I will not.”

You sound almost... affectionate. The sort of affection with which you would speak of her.

“You will not?” Galadriel says, barely above a whisper. For a moment, you shut your eyes, breathing as if to steady yourself before you meet her gaze again. It is your turn, now, to make a great confession.

“Because it is a ring of promise as well.”

“Promise? What sort of—?”

But she knows. As the skies darken overhead and the dread settles in her lungs, she knows exactly what you mean. Only, she cannot believe it.

She knew you had come to care for Halbrand, but she had not imagined your feelings ran so deep. Or perhaps she had not cared to see it. But even if you had fallen for the supposed lost king of the Southlanders, surely once you learned of his true nature, you would never so much as consider—

“I know what you must think,” you say, in the same eerily calm tone you did at the beginning. “All the years we spent together... Fought together... Had you asked, I would have been yours in a heartbeat. But there was nothing you wanted more than to find him. You always chose him. Now, so have I.”

“No,” Galadriel says. “No. These are his words, not yours!” She surges towards you, aiming to take hold of your hand again. You let her, but this time it isn’t only the gem that feels cold to the touch—it is your skin itself. “What has he done to you?” she asks, frantic. “Speak to me. Please, tell me what has happened! There must be a way to put this right.”

“All is right,” you insist, shaking your head as if explaining the simplest of things to one who cannot understand. “Do not fight him. Do not fight us. When next we meet, I shall be your queen. And I shall be kind to you. But I cannot be yours.”

Your words cut deep, fueling the flames of despair that have taken hold in Galadriel’s heart. She cannot believe what she is seeing, what she is hearing. You do not have to be hers, she wants to say, even if she wishes desperately that she had told you what you meant to her when she had the chance. You can belong to whomever you wish, so long as you are happy—so long as it is not Sauron himself—

She means to say it. But in a blink, you are gone, and she is back inside Gil-galad’s council chamber.

“And what says the Commander of the Northern Armies?” the High King asks. “Galadriel?”

And so Galadriel knows that the nightmare is over. You truly are in Eregion, and Sauron in the guise of Halbrand may truly be on his way there, or already with you. But the Ring on your finger, and the way your mind had been twisted... She knows that was but a vision given to her by her own Ring of Power, a possible future which has yet to materialize, but which is terrifyingly possible.

She vows to herself, then and there, that she will not let it come to pass.

[ivfrankenstein]

got power over me; 

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: Halbrand/Sauron x fem!reader 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘:

“It's not an enviable fate they've given you. There’s s no mercy in tying you to me.” “It was you, not them, who did the tying. Wasn't it you who named me that precious word — lover? Aren't we bound by the same ties?”

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: maia!reader, angst/fluff here, guess it’s star-crossed lovers trope 𝐚/𝐧: seren — star [in welsh]. gif: @ladyhawke​; eng not my 1st language, so be merciful for mistakes, my stars 🫶🏻

𝕹𝖔𝖓𝖊 𝖔𝖋 𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝖁𝖆𝖑𝖆𝖗 understood the purposes of the One so clearly as Manwë. With Manwë dwelt Varda, Lady of the Stars, and the light of Iluvatar still lived in her face. Melkor feared her more than all others whom Eru made. Back in the days when Melkor's misdeeds began, an idea was sent to Varda to summon a spirit she had created earlier from the Light of the Stars, capable of bringing back those of the good powers who had been seduced by Melkor's darkness.

That light of the combined creation of Manwë and Varda was to reveal the true path to those of Morgoth's devotees who were still capable of seeing it and hesitating.

By the time Serena was descended upon Arda, the Great Enemy had fallen, but his strongest and most loyal servant was still wandering among the living, bringing himself into voluntary exile. Only one and only once did he fall into the despair that led to his repentance. He was called by many names by those who suffered at his hand, but Sauron was his last. 

In those relatively early years of Y/N's life, a name Serena bore in Middle–earth, she lived by instinct rather than orders from above, the way she was able to. Left alone to face all the new things, Y/N was just at the stage of exploring the world that was to become her home for centuries when, along with the rest, she faced Mairon. Which is why, when the two met, it was more of an accident than a successful hunt. But that’s a different story from this one.

That one was about how it's not hard to stop a dagger when it's already so close to someone else's chest, and also how it's not hard to be penetrated by another. This story, on the other hand, is about what you have to deal with when trust isn’t your strong suit after all. 

“Even if it was me who did the tying, I won't let it be used against me.” 

Many days in this wilderness and in this hut overgrown with moss on the outside. No longer than usual, in fact. But apparently too little space, and in its absence, too palpable is the addiction into which he has driven himself and not even noticed. 

“Used? W-what do you think it is? The nets I cast to catch you?” 

Y/N always deftly handled his temperament — not fervent, but at times so chilling that it scorches better than any fire. But this time Halbrand noticed how her lower lip trembled slightly. He didn't care if it was caused by the anger he'd driven her to, or by resentment. All he wanted was to push her to the level of vulnerability to which he himself had reached, so it would be fair.  

“It could become them,” dense shadows ran across his face, dispersed by the warm light of the candles, as he stepped back to curtain the small window. “Have you forgotten what you were created for in the first place?” he looked at Y/N half-turned, just enough to see her reaction, but not enough for her to see his.

Such a typical move of his. Which, in context, is a silent acknowledgement that Sauron is almost defeated, and it touches those deep strings of Y/N's heart that make her cheeks blush. It was obvious that she shared this defeat with him, though to his eyes it remained hidden. 

“You don't think they're proud of what you've accomplished in this, do you?” he taunted Y/N on purpose, outwardly mocking the way she had missed, failed, and fallen, keeping quiet that it was actually him who did all of this. With an impenetrable grin on his face, Halbrand feared that Y\N would seriously back down, obey his deceptive speeches or voice of reason, or anything else that would raise doubts in her faith in him. 

He was seeking devotion, and that devotion was a treasure she would not give him so easily.

“Take off your cynical mask when it's me you're talking to.” Y/N said sternly and rose from her seat, “You wanted me to call you Halbrand,” she took a step toward him, keeping his provocative gaze on her, “so deign not to treat me as if it were Melkor's right hand that appeared before me.” 

“But it is.” Halbrand was gloomy, like an enraged sky before the onset of a rainstorm, and it was almost like he physically exhaled the flames he was diligently extinguishing somewhere in the depths. 

Yet, Y/N kept walking forward, “No, not anymore,” her palm reached his chest and he shuddered, “You were created like Mairon, and there wasn't a single trace on you of what torments you now,” she could feel how his heart pounded out of his ribcage through the thin fabric of his tunic, “The traces will go away if you let them.” She stared at the throbbing vein on Halbrand's neck for a long moment, then looked up at him, “Is it possible for you to let them?” 

Her lips were in such a pleasant, pampering closeness and it made him so angry. It was a desire... something, in this mortal form, that Halbrand had to get used to for quite a while. He ran his hand across Y/N cheekbone the way it was the blade of a knife, not his finger. 

“If all this turns out to be the intention they put in you, my Serena, just to punish me..” he grabbed her neat face, “It'd better not be, because I'm going to be dead pissed.” 

Y\N only laughed at it, “You should know me better than that.” she found his hand, only briefly averting her gaze from his eyes fixed on her, and wove their fingers together, “But instead, you choose to be blind.” 

Whether it was the sweetness inherent in a woman's nature or the the prodding effect of Maiar, Halbrand, yet, wanted to believe that this was how love was functioning. He had only basic notions of this curse, but even that was enough for him to classify himself as one of these poor doomed men as well. This weakness, seeping into him like poison, urged him to give in, to give more than he had, to the one he had chosen (or not chosen), but wanted to keep near him either way. 

He was holding Y/N by the chin when, for the first time, the crystals of tears gathered at the border of her fluttering lashes became obvious to him. Her soul languished in oppressive anticipation for at least a word, his word, to be spoken. 

“I will spend entire years needing you if you ever abandon me.” he said in a low voice, “Will your love be enough not to condemn me to such a fate?” 

Y\N gently moved her palm to Halbrand's neck, and softly drew him to her until their foreheads touched. To her relief, he followed easily. “I don't know what our fate is, Hal,” his breath was warm on her, and it reminded her that this was reality, a peaceful one, not that which she was accustomed to in all her chilling visions, “Is yours enough to keep us both from getting there?”

[thegreatzombieartisan]

Rings of Power + Tolkien Fusion Meta

What’s in a Name: Case for ‘Halbrand’ as Sauron’s True Name - One That Shall Never Be Known Part t. 2

Series : Pt 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

Why does Sauron have an Elvish name? Well ‘Mairon’ isn’t a name, it’s a title

*

The most pragmatic reason? Sauron once coexisted with the Eldar in Valinor and moved among them. Not far-fetched, as even post-prison Melkor was re-welcomed among the Noldor, who ‘took delight in the hidden knowledge that he could reveal to them' [1]. If so, dare it be asked, did the Eldar bestow their future tormentor “The Admirable” title? After all —Sauron, Gorthaur, Thû —Elves ain’t shy about giving old boy nicknames.

What is sure, as Noldor royalty, Galadriel and Mairon would have definitely met under better circumstances.

In contrast to the published The Silmarillion -- which has Mairon yelling #YOLO and joining Melkor in Middle-Earth long before the Elves awoke -- Tolkien did experiment with such a backstory origins storyline[8].

In S1:01, we see the light of the Two Trees of Valinor destroyed.

In The Silmarillion, Melkor forms an uneasy partnership with a giant spider named Ungoliant to carry-out the dastardly deed [2].

But in a different version, Sauron replaces her as the reason why Elves can’t have nice things before joining Melkor in Middle-Earth.

Sure, The Silmarillion is a draft yet it’s unlikely Tolkien would have reintroduced a plotline where Sauron and Eldar could be potential besties. It would require rewriting intricate lore. Besides, pre-Second Age was Melkor's time to wreak havoc on the Elves.

So again, why is Mairon an Elvish name?

*

'Mairon' is a Quenya Elvish translation of 'The Admirable' in the Ainur Language

Valarin -- the "tongue of the gods" -- predates all Elvish forms. Few every learn it ,as most little Elf ears judged Valarin as unpleasant and alien AF. Some Valarin words and names into “fair Eldarin” (Elvish) [4].

See translations below. Listen to them said in Valarin here:

Aulë - Aȝūlēz

Telperion - Ibrîniðilpathânezel 

Manwë - Mânawenûz 

⁠Oromë - Arǭmēz

Ossë - Oššai/Ošošai

In Valarin, ‘Mairon’ is most likely Mayarônôz (pronounced my-yah-row-noze)

Although Tolkien never fleshed out Valarin, enough exists to fairly conceptualize ‘Mairon’. Translation credit to @valarinventures [4]:

Known Valarin words starting with a “M” + vowel translate exactly into Quenya. Now it’s ‘M’.

In Valarin, Ainur = Ayanûz. So the ‘ai’ of ‘Mairon’ is translated into ‘aya’ in Valarin. Now it’s ‘My-yah’.

(+/- z) suffix might indicate the nominative singular or plural noun. That is, Mayarônôz (+ z) might be ‘The Admirable’ (singular), while Mayarônô (- z) might be ‘The Admirables (plural).

If Mayarônôz left Valinor before they awoke, how did the Eldar learn of his name? In the Valaquenta, it’s written:

Among those of his servants that have names the greatest was that spirit whom the Eldar called Sauron… he was of the Maiar of Aulë, and he remained mighty in the lore of that people.

Surely, the Valar warned the Eldar of Melkor and Mairon wickedness. Possibly Oromë told them first, as he was tasked to find and protect the newly awakened Elves in Middle-Earth.

Did Galadriel know Valarin? Once Aulë’s apprentice, Yavanna's handmaiden, and Melian protege — it's likely Galadriel would know more Valarin than most Eldar.

Mayarônôz is still not Sauron's true name

Now the names that we have for the Valar or the Maiar, whether adapted from the Valarin or translated, are not right names but titles, referring to some function or character of the person; for though the Valar have right names, they do not reveal them. Save only in the case of Oromë…[Quendi] asked him what that signified, and again he answered: Oromë. To me only is it given; for I am Oromë. Yet the titles that he bore were many and glorious; but he withheld them at the time, that the Quendi should not be afraid [3].

(Say, what’s with the Ainur “no name reveal” policy?)

Oromë's admission here is profound: Ainur true names lack a primitive root meaning in Valarin. Only the sound of their names distinguish them. He also states that his name (and presumably all Ainur) was "given" to him. By Eru Illuvatar or other Ainur? It's unknown.

Thank you for reading! Your likes and tagged reblogs are appreciated. Got feedback?

What did you like? Got theories or insights to share?

Disagree? I love good faith debate and sparring!

Need clarity on points? Got feedback on readability?

Spot an inaccuracy? Hey, Tolkien's work is complex. Drop it in comments or DM.

Works Cited

[1] On Fëanor and the Unchaining of Melkor, Morgoth’s Ring

[2] On the Darkening of Valinor, Morgoth’s Ring

[3] Quendi and Eldar

[4] Valarin - Like the Glitter of Swords

[5] Why You Should Love Your Guardian Angel (And Not Name Him)

[6] Osanwe - Tolkien Gateway

[7] Orkish and the Black Speech - base language for base purposes

[8] Name for a Dark Lord

[9] Quenya Grammar

[wyrd-syster]

I loved your theory about Halbrand! I couldn’t understand why his arc was dovetailing with Adar’s if he isn’t Sauron, but I loved your ideas. I thought the scene where Adar offers to spare the villagers in exchange for the sword-key was interesting in that Arondir was wise not to fall for it, and when Theo did to save his mom, IMO the show made it clear Adar was about to kill them all anyway before Numenor arrived, which I think supports your first idea for Adar using and killing Halbrand’s loved ones to get him to kill the king. I also wondered if you’d thought at all about him being a repentant!Sauron, something I wasn’t familiar with since I supposed it’s from Tolkien’s letters? I agree if he’s supposed to have been playing some sort of long game this whole time, it makes no sense.

Oooh I hadn't even made the connection between the Adar/Arondir storyline, but you're totally right! Adar is clearly comfortable with using loved ones as leverage to get people to do his bidding. Also consider the scene in the tavern before Númenor arrived – not only was he willing to use the whole village as leverage, he followed up on his threats almost immediately. The orcs stabbed like what, four innocents before Theo relents and hands over the sword-key? And with Waldreg already loyal, I agree that there's little doubt Adar would've finished the job and killed all the Southlanders and Arondir anyways.

I am not familiar with Tolkien's repentant!Sauron theory, though I've seen the phrase thrown around quite a bit on Saurbrand theories here. Again, my problem with this (superficially, I admit, since I obviously need to read into this a bit more) is that we know how Sauron ends up. Even if he is repentant here and has taken on the form Halbrand presents as a way to separate himself from evil, we know this ends in failure because we know Sauron is the big bad of the Second and Third Ages.

And I am all for sympathetic villains (see: Adar) but I think the narrative of, "Welp, tried the whole 'good guy' thing and it didn't work so guess now I have to cover the world in a second darkness ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ " is just not as satisfying or compelling as one of a man who believes he has no choice but to do evil, goes through the acts of atonement, achieves self-actualization and goodness...and then stands up to the evil that first compelled him and is struck down by that foe.

To me, the latter is an arc of Tragedy of Fate, while the former is an arc of Tragedy by Choice. And I just think Tragedy of Fate is sadder. And I live for the pain.

[centrally-unplanned]

Have finished Season 1 of Rings of Power, so for the last two episodes:

Episode 7: HAHAHA they *killed Celeborn*, *offscreen*, *in the backstory*. My man can never catch a break. Virgin till the end

Episode 8: Okay on its own terms this episode is an improvement, finally Galadriel has real character moments and like, rings show up, name of the show and all that. But, as everyone knows now, “Halbrand was ~Sauron the whole time~”, what a twiiist, and he tempts Galadriel to join him.

Alas it really doesn’t make any sense. Its funny because I complained about the bad writing in Episode 6 about how the people of the Southlands never mention the king that Halbrand claims to be, their country gives no evidence of having a king, etc, and it turns out that was true! They haven’t had a king for a thousand years, he was lying. But that doesn’t resolve the contradiction, because the world contorted to support the lie; the people of the Southlands cheer the arrival of their king when he shows up. Why did they do that now, in their memory they never had one? Galadriel & the Elves say “we have had little contact with the Southlands kingdoms for so long we don’t know their royal family status” my dudes in the first episode you had an entire Elvish base in the Southlands, monitoring the kingdoms to make sure they didn’t align with evil like they did with Morgoth! That is why Arondir’s characters exists! Literally what were they doing if they didn’t know the kingdom fell 1000 years ago??

And this is not a ‘guessable’ twist because Sauron’s plan is now to....get shipwrecked and drown in the Sundering Sea? Flit around Numenor, get into bar fights, try to be a smith? Then fight a bit in the Southlands, achieving nothing while down there? Then he fakes an injury to get into Eregion? This isn’t a plan, this is a retcon, if you told me they decided this twist literally while writing the Episode 8 script I would buy it. Sauron in the show is an idiot, this is an awful use of his time. People mention that he ‘manipulated Galadriel’ but he didn’t, he just hid his identity - every single thing Galadriel did she wanted to do from the outset, she was crusading against the orcs, she discovered the ‘symbol is a map of the Southlands’ thing with Elendil, no manipulation happened. I can see Sauron being an opportunist observing to find an opening wherever he is, that doesn’t bother me - but not about the One Ring, that should be a plan, not a rush job. The ring plan almost looks like an accident now, nothing he did all season was related to the rings at all! It was about Galadriel, who isn’t special to him, and wasn’t part of the ring plotline.

Outside of being the Main Character of course, and our PoV. Twist addiction and media tropes are really reigning here, and way too much is being sacrificed for them. You can make this story work, but not without Halbrand being way more suspicious to give his actions logic, and that is anathema to the showrunner’s priorities. Which is sad, because the Galadrial/Sauron scene in Episode 8 is, in isolation, very good. You can make this work. You just have to put in the work.

[fanficlibrary-world]

Rings of Power: 5 Reasons It’s Not a Good Show and the 1 Good Thing About It

*Sigh*  I had such high hopes when it was first announced that we were getting an LoTR series.  Was so excited when the speculation was that it was going to be a story in the First or Second Age.  Thrilled at the idea of Galadriel being the lead character.  Expectations were quickly tempered with the first preview.  And now I can say all of my fears of what that first peak hinted have came to pass.  

First things first, I’m nowhere near a Tolkien scholar.  I know only a small bit, but I know enough of cannon for me to have expectations of certain characters.  And, I know that’s partially a me problem, but seriously, if you’re going to say that you’re doing Galadriel in the Second Age, I don’t think it’s completely my fault that I’m disappointed that I didn’t get anything like what I expected.  You chose to make your main character Galadriel as opposed to making up an OC.  And I get that was for name recognition, but that also means you’re setting expectations, which the writers definitely did not fulfill.  Regardless of expectations, though, RoP just isn’t a good show.  I spoken to a friend a lot about this and I’ve said as an LotR show, it’s bad, but even if it were just a run of the mill fantasy show, it would be mediocre, at best.  And here’s why - and, yes, here be spoilers! 

5. …because plot 

What I mean by this is too much in this series happens because they’re just looking to move the plot along.  Arondir gets captured but we need him back with Bronwyn and in the fight, so just have Adar let him go.  We want Galadriel to return to Middle Earth in glory so let’s have Mirel do a complete 180 because the leaves are falling from the tree.  Galadriel’s only hope to keep Mirel and Numenor in the fight is for Halbrand to agree to return as a king so does, even though, two episodes ago he was begging Galadriel to let him live in peace.  Oh, and Halbrand is Sauron, so, why the hell did he save Galadriel from drowning in the first place?  There’s no rational reason for these decisions.  And really, it cheapens things.   Nothing seems earned.  Everything just goes the way it needs to because plot. 

4. You know they live forever, right? 

From (almost) the moment they introduced Celebrimbor, I was mystified at how they had him act.  All of his bluster about wanting to do something great, to create something great.  He sounds like mortal man who’s realizing that his days are numbered and wants to ensure he leaves a legacy.  (And, I’m going to speculate, he’s likely to cause a lot of trouble in the pursuit of this.)  It was the most nonsensical

thing.  Not only because, as the title says, elves live forever so I can’t really see legacy being something they worry about, but also this guy is Feanor’s grandson.  If there’s anyone that should know better about the danger and price of chasing greatness, it should be that guy!  

Also, this guy is apparently the greatest smith of his time and he doesn’t even know how to combine alloys…

3. 2 + 2 = 5? 

Okay, I know that at times we have to suspend belief and that movie physics, movie time and space don’t always correspond to the real world, but RoP took that to the extreme.  Right from episode one, Galadriel tries to swim back to Middle Earth from Valinor?!?  (Also, that little boat that they shoved the elves in to go to Valinor seemed rather small and uncomfortable for a journey of that length.)  Then, of course, you have the Numenorians arriving in the village just on time.  Forget suspending belief because heroes always arrive in the nick of time, how did they even know where to go?  Also, horses cannot continually gallop.  And they can only travel like 35 miles in a day, tops.  And considering they were carrying fully armoured soldiers, I’m gonna say that those horses aren’t going to manage even that.  And, of course, all of that came over on 3 boat

2. That’s not how Valinor works!

Okay, this is a cannon thing, but I really can’t get over this whole Valinor is like Heaven.  A reward for elves who’ve done enough good.  Just no.  Elves we’re never meant to stay in Middle Earth.  Middle Earth is for men.  And no elf, no matter how powerful can declare who returns to Valinor and who stays.  The call of the gulls, the pull of the sea, this is what calls elves home into the west.  Well, that and the Valar.

Strong Female Character TM

And, yes, Galadriel, or this character that they’ve named Galadriel, is the absolute worst part of this show.  Note, this has nothing to do with the actress.  She works with what she gets, which unfortunately is all the worst traits of a stereotypical “strong female character”.  Angry, entitled, self absorbed, and always convinced that she is right.  Throws a tantrum every time she doesn’t get her way.  This is who the writers decided the Galadriel of this verse would be.  What a travesty!  

They took a character who should be wise, powerful, well respected, with over two millennia of life experience and an understanding that the past cannot be changed and the future will be what it will be, the character described as “the greatest of all elven women”, and slapped her name on a whiny brat.  And the worst part is, none of her flaws are actually presented as flaws.  She’s rarely gets called out on her terrible and hypocritical behaviour, and worse, she gets rewarded for it.  

Her behaviour and the way she gets away with everything means that I don’t have one ounce of sympathy for her.  I don’t care about her loss.  I don’t care about her grief.  Because she hasn’t shown that she actually cares about anybody else’s.  Instead, I spent most of my time yelling at her character, “Not everything is about you!”  

Honestly, at this point, I’m almost Team Sauron, because at least his character has the potential to be fun.  

The One Plus

I’ve written off RoP and will not be tuning into season 2, but there is one thing I will miss and that’s Elrond and Durin and their friendship.  Maybe that’s three things, but seriously, this plot line is everything that I wish the rest of the series was.  Two mature characters who aren’t perfect but have good hearts and put their ppl and their friendship first.  Naturally, conflict comes out of these competing interests, but they deal with them with honesty, and it’s refreshing.  No self-righteousness, no presenting them lying (even if inadvertently) to each other as right or doing the wrong thing but it’s for the right reasons.  Just truth, understanding, and faith in their friendship.  

These are the two I root for, that I feel for, that I worry for.  I know Elrond has to survive but I worry for him because I care.  And I don’t even want to think about what happens to Durin.  I’d take a whole series dedicated to just these two, and Disa!  And, honestly, it’s frustrating because I consider this plot line, these characters, these relationships to be amazing, and if the show were even mediocre I might consider tuning into S2 just for them.  But it doesn’t even reach that bar.  So I wish you Namárië, Rings of Power.  Though I don’t have much hope of you being good, if I did would have stuck around.

[rivalsforlife]

I have better things to do with my time other than think about lotrop and yet here I am. I’m still mad about the celebrimbor/annatar plotline being completely . I can’t say it’s completely ruined yet when I guess they’ve got a season where they can finally fit it in? but I’m still so mad celebrimbor who arguably is the most important character in these first few seasons (if they were doing it right) has such a minor role. maybe that will get better in season 2. probably it will not.

also are they doing annatar? like either “halbrand” comes back and we all just have to accept sauron disguising himself as a lowly human and this somehow working at all, or (hilarious option) he literally leaves as halbrand and comes back as annatar and THEN they actually jump into the canon plotlines which would be so incredibly funny because what was the point of anything in the first season really. hey guys who was that loser human. anyways I’m annatar I have the exact same knowledge as that other guy but I’m pretty now?

also still frustrated by the logic of not just going with annatar that isn’t “we don’t have the rights”, which I could understand, but I’ve read both “we want non-book readers and book readers to be on the same page” (IT’S SUPPOSED TO BE AN ADAPTATION! THEY’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE!) and “who would believe this random guy who shows up claiming to have knowledge from valinor” (THAT’S WHAT THE WIZARDS WERE. THAT’S WHY SAURON DID IT. YOU SHOULD KNOW THIS.)

[tolkiendefiled]

Season 2 Episode 4

Okay, I want everyone to look at the following screenshots. Because that’s right. You get a callback.

You get a callback.

You get a callback.

Everybody gets a callback.

I said in previous reviews that it seemed like the showrunners and writers for the Rings of Power really wanted to retell the Lord of the Rings, and boy, did they prove it with episode four. There’s barely a scene that doesn’t callback to something from the book or the films, and they’re all just painfully on the nose. If they were just going to pigeon hold the story beats from the novel, why not make a Lord of the Rings TV show? I mean, that’s actually what people expected Amazon to do. Instead, we got the Rings of Power and an hour of weird references to things that have nothing to do with the creation of the rings.

Like I said in my previous review, I’d be less bothered by this if the callbacks weren’t so frequent. But this episode hammers home another problem with the constant callbacks: continuity errors. We see this all the time with prequels. Someone says a line or does something that doesn’t connect to or instead contradicts the events of an existing story. Sometimes, it’s a little thing. And sometimes, it’s a story-breaking problem, like having Darth Vader and Obi-Wan fight twice when Vader said, in Star Wars, that when last they met, he was but the learner. Or having Kenobi save Leia as a child when, in Star Wars, she sounded like she’d never met him. Or having Padme die after giving birth when Leia says, in Return of the Jedi, that she remembered her real mother looking very sad. None of those make any sense, and they’re easy to avoid, and yet we have a similar thing happen in this episode.

The worst example is the Elven Rings. Elrond, Galadriel, and their crew head to Eregion to warn Celebrimbor about discount-Jesus… I mean Halbrand. And the whole time, Elrond and Galadriel bicker over her ring Nenya. Galadriel keeps getting visions of dark tidings, and later uses the ring to heal someone, and Elrond keeps telling her not to trust the ring. There are two story-breaking issues with this. One, that’s not how the Elven Rings work. And two, Elrond eventually gets a ring, so they’re going to need a good reason for him to change his mind.

Galadriel keeps getting glimpses of evil events as they head to Eregion. It’s implied that this might be Sauron’s doing; that since he’s connected to the rings, the visions are tied to things that will come to pass because of his actions. So, when the group gets blocked by a broken bridge and try to figure out another route, Galadriel gets a vision of the Barrow-downs near what will eventually become the Shire. By the way, with all the callbacks, I fully expected one of them to look at the bridge and go “Oh, we can make it,” but no one did. I would have let that one slide. Missed opportunity.

But here’s the thing. This isn’t how the rings work. They don’t give people visions. The Elves can have visions on their own, and items like a palantír - or Galadriel’s mirror - can cause visions of the future or past, although the mirror is probably an extension of Galadriel’s natural powers. But the Elven Rings don’t do that. They just preserve. You might ask how this is a problem. Well, if the rings now give people visions about future events, one specifically tied to any darkness or evil stoked by Sauron, why wouldn’t Galadriel, Elrond and Gandalf use their rings to figure out Sauron’s plans during the events of the Lord of the Rings? Why wouldn’t the rings warn them about Sauron’s return in the Hobbit? Better yet, why wouldn’t the rings tell them where the One Ring was or at least who had it? If the rings now have this power, where did it go? After all, the Elven Rings are unchanged by the events of the Second Age, so whatever powers they had during that age they should still have thousands of years later.

The other power that makes no sense is the healing ability. After Elrond scolds Galadriel for listening to the ring, the Elves make their way to the Barrow-downs because it’s the fastest way to get to Eregion. While there, they get attacked by Barrow-wights. Yes, the same Barrow-wights that attack the Hobbits thousands of years later. Now, who do you think, in this merry band of diverse Elves (screenshot below), is the first and only one to die? Yup, it’s the black one. Say it with me: that’s racist. Seriously, you kill the black one? And not just kill him, you do him like the dude from Jurassic Park? Well, at least he got killed after the opening credits. I mean, the show is all about diversity, but then again, they’ve only got room for one black Elf, and Arondir doesn’t share power.

That said, the scene (below) looks awesome. The Barrow-wights are beautifully rendered. This is some stellar animation. If anybody tells you it looks like garbage, they’re not being honest. The movement of their eyes alone sells it. This is some high-level VFX. However, the Barrow-wights are not supposed to be here. The Barrow-downs don’t become a fell place until the Third Age. In the Second Age, they’re actually part of the kingdom of Arnor, and held in high esteem. I double checked that because I was sure that they were fine during the Second Age, and I was right. It’s in Appendix A: “The Númenórean Kings” from the Lord of the Rings. You know, the section the show is supposedly based on.

Anyway, after this, they come across Adar’s forces, who are also headed towards Eregion to get to Sauron, and they get spotted by some Orcs. The Orcs shoot at them, and when one of the Elves gets hit and Galadriel comes over and touches him with the ring, it heals him. That’s also not how the rings work. None of them work like this. We know this because Frodo gets stabbed on Weathertop when he’s wearing the One Ring - the Master Ring, and it doesn’t protect or heal him. The Elves have the ability to heal because of their knowledge of how things work. It looks like magic, but it’s really just a deep understanding of the natural world. However, when it comes to Galadriel, part of her power comes from being taught by Melian, who was a Maia and the mother of Lúthien. Melian was incredibly powerful, using her skill to veil and protect Doriath during the First Age. She taught some of her skills to Galadriel, which were later used with the ring Nenya to protect Lothlórien. So, Galadriel should be able to heal people on her own, although it wouldn’t be instantaneous. She doesn’t need the ring, and the ring wouldn’t do this anyway. At best, they might slow the guy’s death, since it can preserve, but I don’t know of any instance of the rings being used like this. And again, if this were how they work, why wouldn’t Galadriel, Elrond or Gandalf use these powers all the time?

Of course, the scene wouldn’t be complete without Galadriel living up to her nickname (strong-woman), so she gives up her ring to Elrond for safekeeping, and goes to fight the Orcs as a distraction so Elrond can go help Celebrimbor. She does the cool fight scene stuff, but eventually gets caught by Adar, who says this: “Elen síla lúmenn' omentielvo. (A star shines on the hour of our meeting).” Fair enough, but “Mae govannen (Well met)” would have sounded way more badass.

As the Elves leave, one of them comments on how Galadriel is sacrificing herself to save them, and Elrond corrects him, saying that she’s not doing it for them but to save the ring. He really doesn’t trust the rings, which makes sense given the changes to the lore, but it creates a massive continuity problem because, later on, he gets Gil-galad’s ring Vilya, and uses it to preserve Rivendell. That’s one hell of a party switch. How will the show explain this? Especially since there is no One Ring yet, so the book’s pretense of the Elves avoiding their rings while Sauron had his doesn’t work. Maybe they’ll try to claim that, once Sauron is defeated, that his power to influence the rings is gone. But if that were the case, wouldn’t that apply to everything he influenced from this time, like the Nine Kings of Men who eventually become ringwraiths? Once the show gets to this point, we’ll find out how they handle it. But do you see the problems they’ve created for themselves? The more they change things, the harder it is to make it jive with the Lord of the Rings.

Then there’s the Tom Bombadil scenes, where a whole lot of nothing happens. I’ve mentioned the pacing problems with the show, and these scenes are a perfect example of this. It’s just lots of meandering dialogue without any payoff. We find out that the stars the Stranger was looking for were actually on Bombadil’s ceiling, meaning dude’s search was actually for old Tom, who’s apparently supposed to guide the wizard or help him in some way, which he doesn’t do in this episode. And we had to sit through ten minutes of vague dialogue just to get that tiny bit of information, but not before Tom Bombadil gets to say his famous lines to Old Man Willow - excuse me, Old Man Ironwood. That’s right, the wizard gets attacked by a tree (below) and saved by old Tom, who kind of takes his sweet ass time coming to help. We’ve just got to throw that in there, even though Bombadil has nothing to do with the events of the Second Age, or any age for that matter. This is, by far, the most bizarre inclusion for the show because Bombadil literally doesn’t do anything major in the story because he’s not concerned about such things. Why would you add him in to basically do nothing?

Honestly, that’d be a fair question to Tolkien himself because the films prove you can cut Tom Bombadil out of the story, and it really doesn’t make a difference. I mean, I get giving old Tom a cameo in the Rings of Power, like someone randomly encountering him for a moment and then moving on, and even then it would be a stretch. But to try to tie him in with the wizards just makes no sense. He’s so removed from anything like that.

Speaking of making no sense, we’ve got Ents. Is there really any reason for them to be in the story? No. In fact, if you cut the scene out of the episode, you wouldn’t miss anything because it has nothing to do with the overall plot. In the previous episode, an Entwife captured Theo, so Arondir and Isildur decide to look for him. However, the villagers want to get revenge against the people who stole Isildur’s horse. I need to make a correction here. I said, in the previous review, that these were followers of Sauron, but they’re actually followers of Adar.

Anyway, before they leave, Arondir confronts the girl Isildur saved because he suspects she’s a spy. I’ve watched the scene a few times, and I’m not sure if the girl is actually a spy. She kind of admits it, but kind of doesn’t. Arondir demands that she show them where her people live, and on the way, the trio get attacked by some discount kraken (below), so Arondir can spout some lines about the “nameless things in the deep places of the world,” which he calls supper. Oh please, don’t put that in your mouth. You genuinely don’t know where that’s been. Do not. Put that. In your mouth.

Then we get to the Ents. They attack the trio right after Isildur frees the girl for helping him. She draws Isildur’s sword to try to get away, and the Ents think the sword is for cutting wood. The Entwife knocks the girl away - who survives this - and tries to kill Arondir, but he manages to talk her down. Why are the Ents here? Well, because there are Ents in the Lord of the Rings. Oh, you meant in context to the show? Well, remember back in the first season when the Orcs cut down the forest? Okay, that triggered the Ents because they knew some of those trees “from nut to acorn,” so they came to get revenge, like Treebeard with Fangorn.

Now, you might wonder what happens with the Entwives, since Treebeard says - in the Lord of the Rings - that they lost the Entwives and can’t find them. We don’t get an answer. She’s just there and gone after she frees Theo. But it is a valid question, given that the Ents operate on a different sense of time than anyone else, so the Second Age would be a short time for them. The way Treebeard spoke made it sound like the Entwives have been missing for more than a few thousand years. So, all of this is wrong - wrong on such a level that you’ve got to ask why even put it in the show. Do you think Isildur wouldn’t mention coming across Ents? That this wouldn’t be recorded in some lore and then passed down? That certainly someone like Saruman, Gandalf or Elrond wouldn’t know about this? Wouldn’t Elrond or Gandalf tell Treebeard about it, especially after the war when many of the Ents died and the lands needed repair and tending? Again, this creates a very strange continuity error. There’s no reason to do this. It doesn’t even add anything to the story because we don’t learn anything about the Ents. They’re just there.

That said, the Ents (below) do look awesome. I don’t know if any of this was practical, meaning if the Ent models were built for real, but they looked fantastic. I wouldn’t say the effects are better than House of the Dragon, but they’re much better than this show’s first season. If the show gets snuffed for VFX nominations this year, it’d actually be pretty unfair. This stuff is really good.

What’s not good is this nonsense with the Hobbits. Nori and Poppy wind up near the Stoor city, and bump into Merimac (pictured below), who answers the unasked question of what happens if you leave a Dwarf in the middle of Mad Max. I haven’t seen character designs this bad since the Hobbit films. And them ears! God damn! It’s because he’s brown, isn’t it? How come none of the white Hobbits have them janky ass ears? And how come he has to be dumb as dirt? My man is so stupid that, if you told him to tie his shoes, he’d actually try to do it and then pop back up and say, “I haven’t got any.” No, what gave it away?

Merimac unintentionally leads the girls to the Stoors’ village, which is just sitting in the middle of the desert. My first thought was: I hope they don’t light fires at night because people could see them miles away. And wouldn’t you know? If they were trying to hide, they failed. Anyway, they meet the leader of the village, who’s full of sass, and ties them up when they tell her that they’re looking for their friend, the wizard. Why? Because the only wizard this group knows of is the dark wizard. But later that night, she frees Nori because of what Nori said about her people traveling around, following a man named Burrows. Why? Well, because in the before times, another man named Burrows left the Stoor village to find a green place and promised to send someone back, and this woman thinks it might be Nori. Again, none of this is in the books, but that’s not my main problem with this part.

My problem is that, in the show based on a story written by a linguist who was very keen on tracking the progressions of his languages, the Harfoots have traveled around for thousands of years, and apparently the Stoors can still recognize their surnames. Words change over time, especially hundreds of years. That’s the thing Tolkien constantly mentions in his stories - that people can’t understand each other because of the changes to the languages. It seems like a major oversight, and a missed opportunity to throw in some respect for Tolkien’s love of languages, and actually make the show interesting - by the woman hearing Burrows, and later realizing this sounds similar to some old legend’s name, and then going there. I don’t know if that ever occurred to anyone on the show, but that’s an opportunity wasted.

At any rate, the dark wizard sends Xerxe’s extras to harass the Hobbits into handing over Nori and Poppy, but they don’t comply, and the men threaten to return with the dark wizard himself. That’s the episode. Overall, it was okay. It was very mid and still incredibly slow. 

That said, the VFX were fantastic. My favorite shot was the opening scene (screenshot below). The only things that are real are the actors and part of the set. Everything else is digital or composite, and that’s madness because it’s a single moving shot. The camera moves, stops, and moves again into this wide shot seamlessly. Not an error or flaw to be found. It’s absolute magic. I’ve got to give the effects team credit because their work for this season has been phenomenal.

Unfortunately, the story is still a mess. Since I already know, from the trailer, that Adar and Galadriel team up to fight Sauron, I’m guessing the next episode is where that happens. I swear, if Sauron is easily routed out of Eregion, the show will have killed their own story dead in its tracks. 

[ichabodcranemills]

Episode 4, here we go!

UGHH, Galadriel's crown braid!!! I love it so much!!!

“Trust? Me?” she's so petty, I love her. And she puts so much contempt on her “commander”, poor baby Elrond 😂

TOM BOMBADIL!!!!!

ugh, what is this straight nonsense, Poppy is already taken, kind sir (don't get me wrong, I liked Merimac, he seems fun and interesting, BUT. My Nori x Poopy heart 🥺)

Sorry, I can't stop talking about this, I’ve dreamed of live action Tom Bombadil for so long, he’s so precious. And Goldberry is hidden there somewhere!!!

For real, though, the Stoors are pretty cool. Early Hobbits 🥺🥺🥺

Ohh, we’re getting a Galadriel giving into some sort of dark temptation for sure. WHY else would she say that to Elrond and her vision with Sauron back to Halbrand aaaahhhh

Oh, no the parallels are paralleling 😭 (re: Isildur x Estrid/Haladriel, “They’ll cast me out eventually”)

ENTWIVEEEES

Not to name any names, but isn’t it tasty and fresh how TROP allows women to be pissed and willing to wage war to protect what they love, at times even more than men do? unlikesomeothershows

Oh, the Ents speech was very Tolkien. I’m in tears now.

Oh, no the parallels are paralleling pt.2 😭 (re: Isildur x Estrid/Haladriel, her long lost partner returns 😭)

AAAAAAHHHHHH THAT ENDING

lmao finishing with “Old Tom Bombadill” after the tension was a genius move. I'm obsessed with this song

[liminal-zone]

Okay I know I need to pump the breaks on IF HALBRAND ISNT SAURON WHAT ARE WE DOING HERE as obviously he could also be the witch king or the king under the mountain, etc. and I need to guard my heart from disappointment.

BUT an excellent counterpoint I heard on the Ringerverse podcast was this: we have tv literacy, right??? So when Adar is like ‘no but for real for real who are you?’ and Halbrand just pauses before ghosting him — that means Halbrand is someone known in this time period and all the theories around him being a third age villain are then not really valid. HE HAS TO BE SAURON OR WHAT ARE WE DOING HERE. I AM FAILING AT PUMPING THE BREAKS. 😭

[minetteskvareninova]

Minette watches Medici, part 9 (Old Scores)

- Yes, my friends, the triumphant return of Minette watches Medici is here! The series that noone liked, Minette least of all... Like, you thought reading it was painful?! Try writing this shit!

- Okay, first off, the theme song - FUCK the theme song. Either reuse Renessaince, or don’t. Do NOT fucking cheat by using its inferior knockoff. Understood?!

- The characters aren’t good enough for me to fall in love with, but I still Vibe with them in general. Except for Lorenzo, who is hot, smart and in general a veritable boyfriend material - well, except for the whole “banging a married woman” thing, but it’s renessaince Italy, people are having extramarital shags left and right, we can’t go all Savanarola on their asses, not when real Savanarola is just around the corner...

- Speaking of clergy! My stupid ass mistook Piero for some kind of family priest. Would the Medici even have a family priest at this point? Like, maybe, they were of course loaded and their household might’ve been big enough to warrant it...

- The evil Pazzi brother has a strong “if villain evil why hot” energy. What can I say? Minette loves herself some good cheekbones, and I strongly suspect this guy is going to be the old Albizzi of this season. Helps that his most evil act so far was beating the shit out of Giuliano, and I personally don’t care about Giuliano.

- The most thrilling subplot of this season is “did Sean Bean keep true to his vow to stop feeding the meme machine and never ever take another role where he dies?”. Also, Ned Stark did NOT age well. Which, okay, he’s not there to be hot, and his show son is hot enough to cover the raging unsexyness of not only his father, but also his stupid brother.

- Speaking of! Lucrezia’s boyfriend is apparently played by Halbrand from The Rings of Power. Yes, the man meant to be Sexy Sauron that doesn’t end up being all that sexy. Honestly, I cannot fathom how the producers over there at Amazon looked at this show and were like “why, yes, wouldn’t EVERYONE be tempted to join the dark side by this hot piece of ass?”. Like, no, I personally wouldn’t be tempted into a game of spin the bottle. Baby Pazzi’s personality doesn’t help any, like him and Lucrezia are just Mehmet Giray and Fahriye hardboiled without salt. I mean, it is just the first episode, so maybe they get better later, but still.

- “We raised Sandro as our own” - NO. Show, I am willing to swallow anything, but do not try to convince me the Medici family has taken in Sandro Boticelli of all people as their ward. From now on, I am just pretending this is some kind of Lorenzo’s artist buddy, who just happens to be named Alessandro, and very much not the author of The Birth Of Venus and Primavera.

- Political stuff is still the best part of this show bar none. Just... A+++ out of the gate, no notes. “Did the Pazzi family orchestrate the attack?” may not be as exciting a premise as “Who killed old Giovanni?” (or “is Sean Bean going to die again?”), and probably doesn’t have an answer that interesting, but it still gives some juicy, juicy drama. Though if the whole thing was orchestrated by the guy who wanted to marry his son to Lucrezia, I will get pretty mad at the blatant ripoff of the last season, where a third party also turns out to be the real villain.

- One annoying thing that persists (and if anything seems to have only gotten worse) is the attempt to whitewash the Medici family. Like, I get that we want to add layers(tm) and likeability(tm), but the show’s attempts to pretend they are anything but ruthless protocapitalists trying to make their way in an oligarchical political system do sometimes go way too far. Lorenzo is already hot and smart, I won’t get mad if he isn’t also perfectly good and saintly and shit.

- Contessina had a cameo in this episode! Yay! Also, I wonder if Piero’s second daughter appears in the show; I mean, she doesn’t have to, considering she was already married at this point, but you know. It would be nice.

- Overall a nice return to form, no big complaints from me so far...

[sentimental-darkness]

Amazon Caused Re-wiring of Tolkien Fans???

I’ve seen people excited about RoP discussing Halbrand being Sauron and many of the arguments were like “in canon Sauron is the King of the Southlands, before he goes to Numenor” and I. JUST. CAN’T. Are their brains rotten or something? How much of self-rewiring do you need in order to enjoy something that’s not at all in agreement with any canon? Did Amazon just change their entire perception of Tolkien with a switch of a button?

No, “Southlands” didn’t exist, it’s an artificial creation unique to Amazon and in the show it was occupied by the elves... which is a whole new level of stupid in Tolkien’s Second Age but nevermind.

In canon Sauron called himself King of Kings (among other titles) as a ploy against Numenoreans to piss them off - even though he didn’t exactly control all of it, because there must have been some ports and enclaves still controlled by the Numenoreans and resisting him. There was no “king of the Southlands” - there were many kings and different chieftains and different peoples, and everything seemed to resolve around Eastern shores of Middle-earth, politically - Harad, Far Harad, Umbar, parts of future Gondor like Harondor and slightly above maybe. Anfalas and the entire coastline North of Numenor, even if somehow developed and with Numenorean outposts, seemed rather untouched and untamed by larger forces yet (based on Tal-Elmar), so it should matter less in a story centered around Second Age and Numenor. The South should matter more!

But the actual “South” in Amazon’s “adaptation” is completely erased, what they call “Southlands” isn’t really South. No Harad and no Umbar, no Eastern coastline (nor any coastline for that matter, probably just things near and around Mordor area). It’s a subversion of the highest degree and now people who call themselves Tolkien fans act as if Harad never existed in canon and didn’t matter, as if Sauron was interested in being “a king” of these underdeveloped areas which were less strategically important, as if artificial Southlands truly existed in canon... because apparently they forgot all about Harad and vast Eastern territories Numenor and Sauron waged war on and where Al-Pharazon ultimately “humbled” Sauron. Basically, they’re fine with whitewashing (and American-style diversifying) unique Southern cultures that should have played key parts in this story... and they act like this is all canon... 

I'm done. This is a farce right now. Can’t believe what happened to this fandom and all it took was Amazon fooling them with a fake territory that has a “south” word in its name.

Also, they’ll call as “racist” because we actually wanted to see some canon POC cultures and kingdoms in the show, because we dare to point out they actually existed and Amazon ERASES THEM. The level of denial and psychological rewiring here is OUTSTANDING, something incredibly sad and worrying.

[elis-corner]

The fact that I don’t get how people can watch the same thing over and over without a decent gap in between and complain if they do so without headphones in, and yet that’s exactly what I do with animatics and trailers, is highly amusing to me.

And because it’s been long enough without me having ranted about Lord of the Rings here you go XD

The trailer for the Amazon show. Oh my god it’s gotten me hyped. Honestly, I forgot about that villain Amazon has made, Adar. Why are you naming him Adar? Adar is elvish for father, that’s common knowledge! I swear he better not be one of Galadriel’s brothers like everyone is assuming. While typing this up I came to the frightening realisation that the photos we have of him match a certain First Age elf who is likely still alive at that point, and his name is Adar. First Age elf who matches this OC, most likely dubbed “Adar” by the characters within the show... I swear if Adar is Maglor I will personally go murder the showrunners, scriptwriters, and anyone else responsible. /j /lh

Hands down Meteor Man is Sauron, and you can’t convince me otherwise.

Next, OCs. Look, I don’t mind a bit of variation from the original text, but the elf/human relationship they’ve created is questionable in my eyes. 1. When has that ever ended well. 2. They have a perfectly good love story to focus on already.

What love story you may ask? An important one, thanks very much; Elrond and Celebrian. The issue is that we have no hints that they’re showing it, as we have no confirmed actress for Celebrian. However, there are rumours that someone was hired (and the lady gives off Liv Tyler vibes so perhaps), Tolkien fans will be annoyed if this is excluded, it leaves people who don’t know much outside of the Third Age wondering who Elrond has kids with, so they hopefully will include her. Personally, she’s one of my favourite elves, and when I got back into art and writing last year, most of what I did centred around her. Also, it gives more content and tension for those scenes with him and Galadriel, since she likes Elrond and his forebearers, however despises those who raised him. Anyway, I just think they should use her to their advantage.

The shot from the most recent trailer of elves standing in a circle raising their swords. I am hyped. If it isn’t a flashback to the Oath of Feanor I’m going to cry. Maedhros and Maglor are two of my favourite elves of all time I need to see them. If it is though, we actually see four elves (one only for a split second), all with black hair, which probably means it’s Curufin, Caranthir, and Maglor (since Maedhros, Amros, Amras, and Celegorm do not have dark hair, and Feanor would likely be in the centre).

Halbrand looks way more like Aragorn than Isildur does, just saying. Not to mention Halbrand follows Dunedain naming schemes, and there is a LotR character called Halbarand which is awfully similar. On the topic of names, our first on-screen female dwarf is called Disa. The only named female dwarf Tolkien ever wrote about was Thorin’s sister, and her name was Dis. So wow, Amazon, big creativity right there. What does Disa mean anyway? Same with Theo (theod what you see in names such as Theoden, not theo)...

The casting for Gil-Galad is perfect. Not only is he a great actor with the perfect vibes, but he looks a lot like the Gil-Galad we see in the LotR prologue, which is great. Talking about continuity, those close-ups of Galadriel’s eyes are clearly reminiscent of the same thing happening in the original trilogy.

My sister thinks Elrond looks like Tom Holland, which I sort of see... I think she’s just trying to ruin the best elf for me.

That scene with red has my mind going haywire excuse me while I theorise every possible moment- Let’s see, is this Melkor being destroyed, the fall of Numenor, the curse of Mandos, or the First Kinslaying... I reckon that it isn’t the Kinslaying because Galariel says “you have not seen what I have seen”, and Elrond is also a Kinslaying survivor. The only other thing I know is that it looks sick.

Rest assured, if I have any more random thoughts you will receive essays >:)

This? Oh, no, this isn’t an essay. These are dot-points.