#if u are transmasc and have experienced transphobia i'm really sorry that happened to you.

[babsaros]

hey. when cis society is oppressing a trans man, what he is experiencing is. In Fact. misogyny. i'm sorry i know none of us like to be reminded of our agab, and it hurts whenever people perceive you as the wrong gender. but a cis person hate-criming, assaulting, verbally abusing, etc, a trans man is not doing "transandrophobia" because they do not perceive him as a man.

they perceive him as a woman failing at her gender, as a woman who has been seduced and lied to and manipulated because women are so easily led astray, just like it says in the bible. they perceive him as a woman who has been mutilated. they perceive him as a dyke that needs to be fixed. if they are hate-criming him because they *do* perceive him as a man, because he passes well enough they aren't thinking he could be trans, then they're doing so out of homophobia, perceiving him as a gay man, a pervert, a sissy, a danger to children. OR, they are being transphobic but specifically because they think he might be transfeminine instead. when cis society oppresses a trans woman, they are able to do it on multiple levels at once. She's a woman failing at her gender, a dyke that needs to be fixed. Or she's an evil and grotesque crossdressing pervert, a rude caricature, a danger to polite society. she will never be doing enough to escape oppression entirely, no matter if she gets every surgery she can and wears makeup every day and passes perfectly, because she lives under a patriarchy, and she's a woman, so she lives in a panopticon, and HAVING to get surgery and wear make-up to be respected IS oppression, especially if the alternative is being hate-crimed.

trans women (and trans men who pass) are not experiencing "transandrophobia" when a 'queer women and nbs" event turns them away at the door for being too masculine. they are. IN FACT!! experiencing the byproducts of misogyny in a patriarchy!!! where the terfs and coward cis women running those events and occupying those spaces have been taught (sometimes through experience, sometimes by men, sometimes by women) throughout life that men = stronger and more dangerous than women ALWAYS. That they need to protect themselves at all times and always be vigilant. That men and women can't be friends without sexual tension (and so as queer women the mere existence of what they perceive as a "man" is a threat). That women need a separate sports league because they can't possibly compete with someone who has even a little bit "extra" (an unquantifiable amount actually because there isn't a standard range) testosterone. That women should cook and men should fix cars. i promise you, i promise i promise i promise. it's misogyny. like!!! you don't say cis gay men experiences "androphobia", bc that's not a thing!! you sound like fucking mens rights activists guys please! you don't say a black man experiences "misandrynoir"!! because living in a patriarchy fundamentally means men do not experience oppression based on their gender. its not happening. shut the fuck up. stop walking us back to 2014 can we please take a step forward and stop bitching about this. there are genuine issues in the world and i'm frankly sick of people who should be smarter than that needing to be gently hand-held through this fucking explanation for the millionth time and still stomping their feet.

[catgirlforeskin]

I feel like you saying that transfems somehow experience this godly level of oppression that trans men won't ever understand is really ignorant and childish in the face of the very real experiences we have? Like.

I didn't end up in online sex work where I was taken advantage of and praised specifically for being transmasc for u to say that. People specifically used me and my trans body as a way to alleviate their guilt for sexually abusing a 14 year old because I wasn't a girl (but not a boy because that makes me too human, acknowledging what i actually am, that I'm anything more than a goddamn fuckdoll.) They fetishized me for being a subhuman tranny and they convinced me that it was totally kinky and cute to call me transphobic slurs during e-sex and blackmail me into telling them my deadname. I've sat through degrading comments from family members asking about my reproductive system with the invasiveness of a doctor and Ive been harrassed by every member of my family about the "irreversible damage" and I've watched the biggest fucking public figures talk about me like I'm a baby and tear away my transition opportunities one by one.

I'm fat and disabled and I'm in constant fucking pain but doctors haven't taken me seriously, and it was even less so when I came out. I have not gone through this fucking hell for you to be a whiny shitass. You are a goddamned adult, act like one.

I like your blog, I think you're funny and I'm sure we'd get along great irl but this is not the shit and you need to cut it out. You need to realize that hurting your trans brothers like this gets you nowhere. Trans people need each other.

I need you to realize how triggering it is for a trans man to read your blog and see the stuff you say about us. it is dehumanizing and gross and you're contributing to transphobia, whether or not you like it.

I enjoy how all your jabs on me are done in the most paternalistic way possible, was your transition goal “shitty dad”?

Not really sure what sparked this, feel like I haven’t talked about transphobia at all in a while on here, and when I have never once said trans men don’t experience transphobia, I’m genuinely sorry those things happened to you, though it’s also weird for you to drop all that in my inbox. I’d rather not strangers tell me in intimate detail everything bad they’ve ever experienced, including sexual violence, for the sake of an argument, y’know?

Is this because I’ve spoken out about transmisandry and its variants not being terms people should use, and those posts are circulating again or somethin? I’m more confused than anything