#ig its implied dhdh

[waybrights]

sasha had always been the type of person to jump to conclusions. it wasn't something she was proud of, how her mind would jump to the worst possible scenario all because of the way someone looked at her, but she'd never cared before. not really. not when it never affected her relationship with her friends, with the two girls she would go to the ends of the earth for.

but then it did, because of course it would catch up to her eventually (life seemed to have a way of doing that to sasha, waiting until everything was going well to smack her with a thought she couldn't shake for weeks no matter how often she tried to reassure herself it wasn't real). she couldn't even remember what had caused that awful sinking feeling to climb up her chest and freeze her lungs, all she knew was that one second everything was fine, and the next she couldn't think about anything but anne's tone or the twitch of marcy's eye.

they hated her.

it was only a matter of time, she thought to herself, pulling her hands out of marcy's weak grip and dropping them to her sides, they were going to realise sooner or later that she was a bad person and hadn't changed no matter how much she pretended she had. she was okay with that, really, she'd come to terms with the reality of her situation years before it had even happened, even before amphibia and they'd finally told her how awful she was to her face, even before she herself realised how much of a bad friend she was, sasha had always known they would leave her one day.

of course they would, everyone else did.

in fact, she was surprised they stayed for so long. that even after everything they sat with her on anne's couch, wrapped around her and giggling at a joke she didn't even remember telling.

but all good things must come to an end, and here was their end: a single thought running through sasha's mind, there for a second but clinging to her like a cloud of smoke settling around her mind, blurring everything around her until it was just that thought left.

they hate me. i should just go.

she didn't go, though. she tried, she tried so hard to just wiggle out of marcy's grip, to slide anne's head out of her lap without causing too much of a disturbance, but anne had sat up, her eyes wide and lips pulled into a frown and asked sasha what was wrong in such a gentle, calming voice sasha found herself unable to speak. all her thoughts went silent as she sat there, perched on the edge of the couch like a bird ready to take flight, staring at anne with scared eyes.

"nothings wrong, annie," she'd tried to reassure her with a smile, but even to her it felt wobbly. anne, sweet, kind anne, leaned forward, her frown deepening, and took sashas hands in her warm ones.

"is it happening again?"

"no," she swallowed, shaking her head, "no, no i just need to pee, that's all."

"you're not a good liar, sash," anne whispered, a flicker of her smile crossing her face. "i know somethings up."

"i've always been a good liar," sasha huffed and turned to look at the TV screen, the film they had been watching was paused but that didn't stop sasha staring at it, eyes stinging with unshed tears.

"whatever you say," warm hands gently cup sasha's cheeks, "but please tell me what's up, even if its stupid. you keeping it inside isn't going to help anyone in the long run."

with anne's warmth enveloping her and her words finding their way through the smoke in sasha's mind, sasha felt something in her chest snap, and as the first tears trickled down her face she couldn't stop the sobs that followed.

before she knew it, anne had gathered her into her chest, pressing sasha's head so that it rested above her heart, and every single one of her sinful thoughts came pouring out.

"i'm just," she sobbed and her whole body shook with the force, "so scared you're going to leave, and that everything that's happened has been a lie." it sounded pathetic when she said it aloud, and god anne must think she's such an idiot. "i know it's stupid but i don't want to lose you again, either of you and i'm so scared i will."

"no its not stupid, sash," anne said ever so gently, her fingers carding through sasha's hair as she spoke. "but we're never going to leave you, okay? we made a promise remember, all three of us. we promised to never, ever, leave each other again, not if we can help it," she bent over and her breath tickled sasha's cheek, "and i intend to stick to the promise until i die."

"why? you should hate me!"

anne let out a sigh and shifted under sasha, not once though, did she pull away. "i did at first, sash, i'm not going to lie to you, and it took me a while to forgive you for everything. but i have now, and i'm not mad at you anymore, i haven't been since we came back-"

"but why? why did you forgive me after what i did?" sasha sniffled, trying to choke down her sobs.

"because, you were scared and young, and so was i, so was marcy. we were all kids who had to do what we had to to survive. we both know what you did was wrong, but you’ve shown me time and time again that you're sorry and i believe you. i know you won't betray me again, and i know you won't hurt me again. sure it took me a while to see it, but i do now, and i forgive you."

"anne-"

"no," anne interrupted before sasha could push out another apology, "i don't want to hear another apology from you today. i forgive you and i love you so much. so let me help you get rid of those thoughts, okay?"

all sasha could do was nod before anne was making herself comfortable, pulling sasha into her lap fully, wrapping a blanket around their shoulders and whispering kind words into her ears.

it wasn't long until sasha felt her eyes growing heavy and anne's warmth seeping into her very soul. the smoke had been cleared and all that remained was dried tears on her cheeks and anne's whispers in the dead of night.

sure, sasha waybright had a habit of jumping to conclusions and teetering on the edge of life and fantasy, but she had two friends that could pull her back even when she felt as though she'd fallen too far.