#ignores the heat in his stomach n the way seb’s eyes dart to him and down to his hips when he stands up. lingering…..

[milflewis]

Lmao Niamh. They all would use race debrefing as dirty talk, wouldn't they. It's like a praise kink. Or degrading, sometimes. Depending on whom we're talking about. Oh my god.

this is a sport of car fuckers. ofc they use debriefing the race as dirty talk

[rose-stardew-imagines]

Hi, I don't know if it's allowed, I'm new asking for writings and I would like something related to Sebastian discovering that farmer suffers ̶E̶a̶t̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶d̶i̶s̶o̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ and how he treats them. Maybe it's a touchy subject but i need some some support on it. I really like your writings. Hug 💕

Hello, this is absolutely allowed...though it will have a trigger warning obviously. Thank you for your compliment and I hope you get all the best, if you need anyone to talk to I am here...I know what it's like to go through that sort of thing 💜. I chose to have the reader be a female who suffers with Anorexia since that is the one I know the most about and this isn't the subject I want to be getting things wrong about, hope that's okay!

Sebastian x Reader who suffers with a Eating Disorder

TW:Eating Disorder, Weight Loss, Body Image problems, Weight Gain

It had been almost a year of this 'habit' you had acquired. You had started to truly dislike who you had seen in the mirror, your body wasn't as perfect as you had wished. Even though you had spent days working hard on the farm, you had still seen too many curves, too much skin and fat. It disgusted you.

You were determined to lose weight, so you had begun to skip meals. No breakfast one morning, no dinner and lunch the next. It had made you sick, but you saw it as progress...a good thing. So you ignored it. The outdoor heat made you feel dizzy almost instantly, the daily work of the farm was grueling. You had to sleep more, skipping saloon nights and game nights with Sebastian, Sam and Abby.

Your friends had begun to notice as the months drew on. You looked frail, sunken in cheeks and shaky hands. When they would bring snacks, or order pizza from Gus, you always declined. A faltering smile and a hurried response of you 'eating earlier' in the day. Sam and Abigail seemed convinced, though Sebastian had his doubts.

The final straw was in late summer, the sun was scorching down onto you and you were exhausted, having to use your hoe as a cane as you worked on the farm. Strong dizziness washing over you whenever you turned your head too quick or moved too fast. This happened so often, yet you never stopped, you didn't want to give up your goal of achieving the "beauty" you so desperately craved. Once you were thin enough, you would stop. You always said that, yet your goal kept raising and raising, you could never reach it.

"Y/N?" You head snapped towards the sound, gripping onto your tool and blinking the stars away. Sebastian stood in the gateway of the crop field, his purple hair pulled back behind his neck and his usual hoodie tied around his waist. "You alright? You weren't answering your phone." He asked, brow furrowing as he looked over you. You nodded shakily, feeling as if your knees would give out below you.

"Yeah, sorry. Just been working all morning and haven't had my phone on me." You apologized, running your free hand through your hair. "What's up Bas?" Sebastian hummed, diving his hands into his pockets, keeping his eyes locked on you.

"Abby and Sam wanted to go hang out at the beach tonight. Just wanted to see if you wanted to join." Sebastian bit the inside of his cheek, looking away briefly. "Abigail and Sam are planning on swimming, I'm just going to hang out though." Your heart sank to your stomach. You rushed to figure out some sort of excuse, anything to get you out of going, having them see you in a bathing suit.

"Uhh," You stuttered, wringing your hands together. "I...don't think I can. I am going to be busy most of the day with this," you vaguely gestured to the fields around you. "Autumn is starting soon, lots of new seeds to plant." You explained quickly, hoping he somehow wouldn't notice that you were almost done clearing the fields.

"I can help if you want." Sebastian hummed, "I don't have much work to do today anyway." He held his hand out for the hoe stuck against your side. "You can go take a break for a bit." A tiny smile found its way on his face. You chuckled, gripping the tool tighter in your hands.

"Didn't know you were good with farm work Seb." You teased, smiling. You hesitantly handed the hoe over to Sebastian. "Thank you." He nodded with a small smile, walking off. You dug your heels into the dirt, trying to keep yourself stable as you slowly walked over to your front porch, sitting on the steps and watching Seb as he cleared the fields.

It had taken him about an hour to clear the fields, you had run into the house a few times to bring him water, and to let your dog come out and say hello. The sky was painted with red hues, cool breeze sweeping through the trees.

"We should probably go soon," Sebastian mumbled, leaning back against your porch railing, hair pulled back from his tired face. "Sam and Abby are probably there by now." You nodded, quickly pulling yourself up. The motion caused to spin, stars flashing before your eyes as your knees lost their strength. You heard a low buzzing, a figure moving in the corner of your eye as your knees gave out, and the last thing you felt was a set of arms grabbing you.

You slowly blinked your eyes open, bright flourescent lights burning through your eyelids. You hissed, pushing yourself up to scan your surroundings. You were in Harvey's clinic, numerous machines and monitors beeping around you. Sebastian was sat next to your bed, leaning down and resting his head on the space by your leg. His hair was a mess, and his breathing was deep and slow, his face turned towards you. How long had he been here?

You hesitantly ran your shaky fingers through his purple hair, loosening the knots and messy spots. His eyes fluttered, and he sighed, turning his head and slowly sitting up. You quickly pulled your hand back, occupying it with the many blankets laid over you.

"Y/N?" He mumbled groggily, rubbing the heel of his palm over his eyes and looking up at you. His features brightened up slightly. "Your awake, I'm glad." He smiled, scooting his chair closer to the bed. "How are you feeling?" You shrugged, tightening your grip on the sheets.

"Fine...tired. What happened?" He swallowed hard, clearing his throat and glancing towards the door.

"You passed out. You wouldn't wake up so I ran you to Harvey's." His brow furrowed, "He said it was cause of malnutrition. How long have you been doing this? He said it must have been weeks since you ate properly." His dark eyes burned through you. The air felt caught in your throat as you fumbled for words. Desperate for anything to say that would calm him down.

"It hasn't been that long, I swear. I've just been busy these past days and forgotten-"

"Bullshit." You froze, looking up at him quickly. "That's bullshit and we both know it. You have been here passed out for days, Harvey didn't think you would come out of it okay and you try and lie to me?" He hissed, his now shaky hands darting into his pockets. "Tell me the truth, Y/N." Your heart sank to your stomach, your gaze drifting down to your lap. Hot tears pricked your eyes, sending large drops onto the bed.

"A couple of months...." You whispered, his hissed in a breath through his teeth. "I didn't....I-" You quickly wiped your eyes, anxiously running your fingers through your hair. "I'm sorry...Seb." He shook his head quickly, scooting his chair closer to you, nervously taking his hands out of his pockets to have them open on the bed. A silent offer.

"You don't have to apologize to me...just...you don't have to do this to yourself." You looked up and stared at his pale hands, slowly reaching out and placing your hand in his, your fingertips brushing over his many calluses.

"Yes I do, I-" His grip on your hand tightened.

"No. You don't have to starve yourself like that, Y/N." He slowly rubbed his thumb across the back of your hand, his gaze softened, a warm kindness kindling in his dark eyes. "You are perfect, please...don't do this to yourself. You aren't alone....I've got you." You bit the inside of your cheek.

"You don't have to...I'll be fine.."

"I want to." Hot tears brimmed your eyes again.

"Thank you..."

After you got out of Harvey's care, Sebastian stuck with you pretty often, inviting you to his place and texting you daily. You two would text till one of you fell asleep, he would listen to your every worry, bring you out of your darkest moments. He would always be there to support you, and you couldn't be more grateful. He didn't ever plan on leaving you, and you didn't ever want him to.

I know this wasn't my best work...this was really hard to write, but I hope you all like it. Apologies it took so long...I wanted it to be as perfect as I could make it... ~Rose💜

[imagining-supernatural]

The First Article

Part 11 of Seventy Percent

Series Summary: When you left on your trip to Vegas, you’d planned on letting loose for one last weekend before heading back to reality and getting your affairs in order so your best friend wouldn’t be left cleaning up your mess when your cancer finally ended your life. What you hadn’t counted on was waking up married to a celebrity who has a knight-in-shining-armor complex, connections with an oncologist, and amazing insurance…

Chapter Summary: You wake up after the big fight with Sebastian

Word Count: 1941

When you woke up, the first thing you noticed was a new glass of water, your morning pills, and a banana on the bedside table.

You’d been so caught up in your fight that you hadn’t realized you’d forgotten to take your medicine. Sebastian, apparently, had noticed. And if he laid them out for you, it would seem he wanted you to continue your treatment.

Because he was a decent person. Because it was his fault you were here. Because he pitied you. As soon as people found out you had cancer, they immediately pitied you.

But that’s all it was.

Pity.

As soon as the treatment failed, or succeeded and you were recovered from surgery, he was sure to drop the divorce papers in your lap, give you a one way plane ticket to Salt Lake City, and tell you he hopes you have a good life.

It’s what any sane person would do.

It’s more than you deserved, to be honest. After everything you’d done in your life…

As you stared at the pills, you debated with yourself.

On one hand, you promised to fight. You promised to see this to the end.

But on the other hand… you knew your track record in life. If you were being honest with yourself, you knew how this would end. And it wasn’t going to end with surgery. It wasn’t going to end with you being cancer free. It wouldn’t even end in remission.

So who were you fucking kidding?

Carefully, you swung your legs out of the bed, ignored the pills, and quietly exited the room. Your bladder was insistent, and, much as you wanted to, you couldn’t hide out in the guest room all day.

As you washed your hands, you stared at yourself in the mirror.

You look like hell, he’d said. And he was right. You lost so much weight that your cheeks were sunken. Sure, cheekbones were sexy, but not like this.

You looked like death. That’s what he should have said. It would have been more accurate. More predictive.

Walking out of the bathroom, you wondered if you should start packing up your shit. Maybe when you told the nurses that you would see them on Monday, that would be the last lie you’d ever tell. From now on, you could tell the truth. You wouldn’t be around long enough to see the fallout that blunt truth would have.

“Hey,” Sebastian greeted, startling you. He was sitting on the guest bed. “You take your medicine yet?”

“No,” you stated, beginning your new truth-telling life. Besides, he could very well see you hadn’t taken the pills, since they were untouched on the bedside table.

He swept the pills into his hand, grabbed the glass of water, and walked over to where you’d frozen in the doorway. “Take ‘em. I grabbed some takeout. It might need to be heated up a bit, but I thought it’d be easy on your stomach.”

“Seb—”

“And I’ll give you my lawyer’s number so he can help you draw up whatever papers you need to give you peace of mind that I can’t be responsible for your debt. That way you can focus on your treatment.” He shoved the glass of water in your right hand and dumped the pills in your left.

“Seb—”

“I’m not arguing with you, Y/N. Take your medicine.”

His eyes were unrelenting, so you huffed a deep sigh and downed the pills.

“Sorry for jumping on you this morning,” he said quietly.

“You don’t—”

“Shut up and let me apologize, Y/N. You were right. I didn’t really understand what I signed up for, but I don’t regret anything. I should have tried to talk to you before I yelled. I shouldn’t have made assumptions.”

“It’s okay,” you murmured.

“No, it’s not. I was wrong, Y/N. I just… When I saw all that, I got scared, okay? And I took it out on you. It wasn’t fair of me.”

What could you say to that? You nodded, hoping he’d accept that response.

Luckily, he did. You let him lead you out to the kitchen and sat on a stool while he set to work heating up the takeout.

“There’s something else we need to talk about,” he hedged.

“Okay,” you whispered.

You’d expected him to explain, but he didn’t say another word until your food was in front of you. Even then, he gave you an expectant look and waited until you took a bite. Once you swallowed, he was satisfied enough to pull out his phone and click around for a bit. “I’m surprised we’ve kept it a secret for so long, but word’s out. Someone saw us in Vegas and took a picture.”

He slid his phone across the counter to you. Right there on Entertainment Weekly’s website was a grainy picture of you, Sebastian, and Elvis in what was unmistakably a Vegas wedding.

“At least they didn’t get a picture of your face, so no one knows who you are.”

“Yet.”

“Yet,” he agreed.

Sebastian reached across the island and tucked your hair behind your ear before cupping your cheek with his hand. When he nudged your face up to look at him, he offered a small, genuine smile. “I’ll get you through this, okay? I’ll take care of the media and whatever shit comes our way from that. You just focus on the treatment.”

All week long, the only time anyone else touched you was when the nurses hooked you up to the machines. So, to feel Sebastian’s hand on your cheek was jarring in a way. It felt good.

You covered his hand with yours and gave him a weak smile.

With a decisive nod, he withdrew his hand and pushed your food closer towards you. “Good. Now eat.”

Your first mistake was telling Sebastian you felt better than you had all week.

It was a mistake because he had interpreted that as I’m definitely feeling up to leaving the apartment on a Saturday night.

And that was how you found yourself sitting in a booth at his favorite diner. No one asked any questions when he asked to be seated at the booth in the back. It was the one that had the most privacy.

As your waitress, Selena took your orders and made small talk, you kept second guessing everything you’d ever said to her. With how often you and Sebastian came here, you’d spoken with the employees here quite a bit. Outside of the hospital staff and Sebastian, they were the people you interacted with the most.

What did they know about you? What had you told them? What could they tell the media, if asked? What details about you did they remember?

“Hey, Y/N.” Sebastian waved his hand in front of your face. “Where’d you go?”

From across the diner, Selena’s laugh drew your attention momentarily.

A quick look around assured you that no one could overhear you, but you still kept your voice low. “Selena has a two year old son who had a cold two weeks ago, which is why she missed work on Wednesday and Thursday. His dad is a slime bag who bolted as soon as Selena found out she was pregnant and she works over 60 hours a week just to give her son, Timothy, what he needs. Timothy likes to be called Tim and his favorite animal right now is the elephant.”

Sebastian raised an eyebrow, clearly not expecting you to say that. “Okay?”

“If I remember all of that about her, what does she remember about me? What could she tell someone else about me? Especially someone who knows how to dig into people’s pasts? I’ve talked to so many people here, and what if they remember something that helps someone figure out who I am—who I was. I know you said you’d take care of the media, but I can’t stop worrying. I’ve told you I have a shitty past and I really don’t want it to ruin your career because trust me, if the gossip in my hometown is anything to go by, people won’t understand what I did.”

Hell, people didn’t even know half of what you did.

Just as he opened his mouth to respond after a moment of considering your words, Selena came back with your food. Besides your orders, she placed two slices of pie on the table. “On the house. Gwen says you look like you need some more meat on your bones and if you don’t want the pie, tough shit.”

Sebastian laughed, and you forced a smile on your face as well. Gwen was the owner of the diner and she was a charming old lady. In the few weeks you’d been here, you realized quickly that she considered Seb like her own family and was very generous towards him. And, by extension, you.

“We wouldn’t dream of saying no to Gwen,” you said, trying not to sound as weak or anxious as you were.

“Good. I don’t want to see her come over and give y’all a piece of her mind along with that pie.” With a wink, Selena turned to take care of her only other table of the night.

When she was out of earshot, Sebastian motioned to your plate and you took a bite of your salad while rolling your eyes. You’d nearly forgotten about his insistence that you eat while he was gone.

“Marvel’s got a great PR team, Y/N. Whatever the media vultures dredge up, they’ll spin it in a good way. When I told you not to worry about the press, I meant it. And if you want to take preemptive action, we can let the PR team know what might come up and they can have a plan in place if people do dig that deep.”

As you fixed your baked potato and took a bite, you considered his words. It made sense. Didn’t mean you wouldn’t worry, though. “I’ll think about it.”

He was curious, you could tell. But you appreciated that he didn’t ask you to tell him what you were so scared of in your past. Maybe he would bring it up again when you were home, in private, but for right now, he changed the subject.

Dinner passed quickly, and when Selena came by to grab the payment, her face was more serious than you’d seen her before. “Thought I’d warn you there are some cameras out front. Brett just came back from his break and said the back way is clear if you wanna avoid them.”

Seb’s eyes darted to yours and you saw his brain turning over as he thought of the best course of action.

“I’ll run your card and be back. Let me know what you wanna do then and we’ll make it work for you.”

She left and Sebastian leaned forward. “What do you think?”

You scraped the last of the apple pie filling from the plate. While your first instinct was to consider every variable and come up with a course of action, you made the conscious effort to push down those thoughts. “You told me not to worry about the press. That’s your job, so I’m going to leave it up to you.”

In the end, you did end up sneaking out the back. Sebastian kept his arm around your shoulder as you walked through the back alley to where Sean was waiting with the car on a side street. As you got into the car, you noticed a camera flash on the other side of the street.

So they patched things up... but can this shaky relationship stand up against the media? And what is she so worried about the media finding in her past? 

Chapter 12: The Second Check-In