#im So Sorry xiao for killin' your not-yet-s/o

[heiayen]

sempiternal - xiao x gn reader

angst, fluff, major character death (no details), no dialogues, xiao dislikes changes, 3rd person view

no spoilers, word count: 596 + fic under the cut!

sempiternal - something unchanging, even eternal

despite the chaos, his life was full of never changing routines.

despite the chaos, things were always the same. the same balcony at wangshu inn, same people, same duties. but it wasn't something he disliked. he actually liked this peaceful feeling and somewhere, deep inside, wished, that it won't change. it was something that made him feel safe in this cruel world, and he wished that this, from all things around him will never change.

till one day, someone new came to the balcony with a plate of almond tofu.

their first meeting ended faster than he thought it will, and honestly he didn't mind. he wasn't in the mood (or rather, never was) to meet new people so it was great for him. he didn't even tried to remember who it was, being sure that they won't meet again. but they did. second time, third time, fourth time and fifth time was special, because this new person tried to talk with him.

and while the convo ended before it could even properly start, this new person tried talking again, and again, till one day, they succeed. and xiao realized that it wasn't... this bad as he thought it will. quite nice, if he really needed to say.

[Y/N], because this was their name, were kind and never pushed him to talk, which was something he greatly valued. and it was a small change that he didn't minded at all. he even... liked it a bit.

the second change was, however, not around him. but im them.

it was just a small change in their hairstyle, yet still noticeable for him. nothing worth mentioning... but he still did and honestly, he was happy that he decided to, because xiao earned the greatest smile in the return.

and the next time, they decided to wear more accessories and xiao noticed it too, and soon it became a small thing, small tradition.

they also had a habit of talking to xiao about their day. it was... cute, at first [Y/N] was trying to keep it short to not bore him, but later, they would start to talk more and more, often about small and not important details. he liked that.

but what he didn't liked was the way his feelings were changing about them. what he felt about them was... new, quite terryfing. how do you deal with the feel of happiness everytime you see them, how do you deal with the need to listen to them all the time? maybe he was sick, maybe he needed some medicine to get rid of it? or maybe, he can just ignore it till it goes away?

but, once he realized that it won't go away, he decided to just... let it be.

he knew that distancing himself away won't work for long, heck, it won't work at all! so he just decided to let it be. he will have plenty of time to deal with it.

...or at least he thought he will, till he noticed how [Y/N] voice was getting weaker and weaker with each their meeting. how they were getting weaker, how it was harder for them to talk with so much energy and passion as before. but they would just laugh at it, that it was fine, they were just tired after comissions, you don't need to worry, xiao.

till they missed one of their daily meetings.

and second.

third.

fourth.

fifth.

and just like this, his life once again, was full of routines.

despite the chaos, it all was peaceful again.

despite it all.

ehehehe. first time writin' xiao and it's angst with major character death, wonderful. next two fics i have planned (kaeya and zhongli) are also... angst. heavy angst this time. the name of the fic is so funny when you look at what happened in the fic itself, not gonna lie