#im also REALLY stressed shes gonna be there and we're gonna come across her out of nowhere and ill have to explain why i didnt invite her

[whisp3roftheheart]

Sometimes I hate that my friend group is so close knit because whenever I'm having issues with one person there is never any real escape from them. At least no meaningful one because no matter what things will always circle back to them and I'll be forced to interact.

[cyarikakay]

In Every Universe I'll Find My Way Back To You

In Every Universe I’ll Find My Way Back To You

Part 3 for all of you have kept up with me🖤

Some warnings for this chapter, age gap, mean Tess, fighting, weapons, and language. If I missed any I apologize! Im sorry to make Tess the bad guy in this one 😭 I do also have Chapter 4 ready it is a heavy one and very long! I am so thankful for all the love you guys have been showing me and I'm super excited to share the next part with you!

Chapter 3: Surfacing The Truth

The sun peered through the cracks of the boarded up windows. Hearing the light whistling of the wind coming through was peaceful but enough to wake you up. Your brain was trained by now, it had its own alarm clock set inside for fight or flight. The heavy footsteps should have been what woke you. But this was the first time in a long time you felt safe.  Joel was your safe place being away from him for so long you forgot what safety felt like. You quickly jerked awake when the food steps got closer, totally forgetting where you were. You knew you were safe, you felt safe, but fear continued to creep up on you. 

“You alright?” he asked, thick southern accent coming through this morning.

“Yeah, just forgot where I was for a minute when I heard you walking.” 

“I’m sorry, always a little heavy footed huh?”

He tried to choke back a laugh, you on the other hand couldn’t help but to chuckle lightly. 

“At least you are aware of it.” 

He smiled, oh… that smile. It was enough to light up a room if he showed it enough. 

“Let's get going.” Tess stated.

Her sharp voice bounced off the empty walls. 

Ellie came out behind her with a smile on her face. 

“Morning Y/n, Joel.”

Her smile turned into a mischievous smirk. 

You all grabbed your things and headed out the door towards your next destination. 

Conversation was minimal right now. Tess and Joel were a head leading the way. 

Ellie on the other hand was back behind with you, curious as ever. 

“Sooo, you and Joel?” She smirked. 

“What about him and I nosey?” You said jokingly.

“I'm not nosey” she laughed.

“I don't get much entertainment and he really seemed to lighten up when you came around, that was the first time i've seen him smile. And i've been stuck with them long enough to know he never smiled.”

“Ohhh you caught on fast huh?” 

“Well yeah… Maybe I am a little nosey after all.”

“It's alright to be curious Ellie. Me and Joel were together before the outbreak, and we got put in a QZ, I was forced to be with Fireflies for a while and now I'm back.”

“Well that wasn’t juicy at all.” 

“Maybe I’ll tell you more someday, but for today we're going to keep it simple.”

“Ughhhhhhh” She sighed ever so dramatically. 

Joel whipped his head around. 

“If you keep sighing like that you are gonna catch flies in your mouth.” 

You couldn't help but to let out a laugh.

“Funny Joel.” she sassily said. 

“We will take a break here.” Joel ordered. 

No one was going to argue. 

It's been a long walk , but the scenery is gorgeous. Its been a very woodsy walk, trees tall, wind blowing. Very admirable. 

You sat down on some old fallen trees to rest, picking at some of your food that you packed. 

You sat next to Joel on one of the logs across from Tess and Ellie.  

Joel broke off a piece of beef jerky and handed it to you with a light smile. 

“Some protein, can’t live off peanut butter.” he jokingly said 

“Peanut Butter is a protein thank you very much.”

He left out a raspy laugh. 

Tess suddenly got up and walked off deeper into the woods. You weren’t sure to go after her or not to see if she was alright. Tess and you werent very close, for various reasons. But you did at one time consider her a friend. You went to get up to go check on her but Joel caught your wrist. 

“Let her go.” he whispered.

“Is she alright?” you questioned sincerely.

“Stressed.” 

It was a simple response but one that you could accept and respect. Everyone deals with stress differently. You wondered if this had to do with Joel. But Joel had admittedly told you nothing was or ever was going on between them. And you trusted that, completely.  

Tess soon came back and started gathering things and insisted that you kept going. You weren't too terribly far off at least another day or so walk. You quickly grabbed your things, Joel and Ellie started leading the way. You trailing shortly behind and Tess behind you making sure nothing was coming from behind. You decided to slow down and bit and try to talk to her, since you've gotten back you two haven't really spoken. You wanted to at least keep the peace. Don't get it wrong you were indeed still pissed at Tess. But you wanted to maintain a calm trustworthy environment for the four of you. 

“Hey.” 

“What?” she responded sharply. 

“Just wanted to see how you were holding up.” 

“I'm fine.”

Okay so no conversation got it, you thought to yourself.

You guys continued walking, from time to time in silence. You had mentioned to Joel earlier that if you cut through the trail it would save you guys some time. 

 “Joel, where the hell are you going?” Tess yelled to him. 

Oh boy she was mad. 

“Tess, I told Joel about the shortcut through the trail.” 

“ Oh got it so you're taking over now huh?” she huffed.

“Tess, I was just trying to help.” 

“Don’t think just because you escaped and found us means that you are going to start calling the shots, I’m in charge Joel takes orders from me.”

You suddenly stopped walking, anger filling your body. 

“Tess, I was just trying to help. I'm not making orders, I made a suggestion. I'm sorry that Joel took it.” 

She turned around towards you, Ellie and Joel still walking ahead. 

“You going to stop and throw a tantrum now?” she threw back. 

“Tess , I’m really not sure what your issue is, if anyone should be angry at anyone here it should be me at you.” 

“You’re ridiculous, you don't get to say anything. You are just as much a kid as Ellie so let the adults handle things.” 

This fueled the fire she had started inside of you. Everything was about to ignite.

“I am an adult, Tess. You don't get to be mad at me. And you sure as hell don't get to call me a kid.” 

“Why are you even here?” she said, raising her voice.

“For Joel, why else? He’s all I got.'' You tried to reason with her and be peaceful but it's getting hard. You aren't sure how far ahead Joel and Ellie were, but you're sure they would catch on soon. 

“You’re a child chasing a grown man y/n. That should tell you something about yourself. Joel doesn't need you. He had a kid and she's gone. He needs a woman, one to keep up with him and take care of him!”

Your chest was heaving at this point, ears were burning with anger. 

“So your behavior is jealousy? That's why you did what you did right? You wanted me out of the fucking picture? And you can't handle that I’m back and Joel smiles again?”

You're not going to give her the satisfaction of tearing you down. You need to play fire with fire with this. 

“I don’t know what the fuck your talking about Y/N.”

She started walking ahead, as if she hadn’t done anything wrong. 

“You do know! You know what you did to me, and it still didn’t work, did it?!” you shouted back. 

She didn't answer she was silent for a moment, her silence made you even angrier. 

“Did it Tess!?” you bellowed out of anger. 

She turned and started walking towards you. At this point you guys were inches apart. Chests rising and falling quickly, heart rates through the roof, jaws and fists clenched. Things escalated quickly at this moment. You didn’t even have time to react to her hand coming up and making contact with your cheek, smacking your face making your ears ring.

“It did work, A real woman took care of him while you were away, probably still going through puberty. That trip should have fixed you right up, but I see it didn't. You should have stayed a little longer.” She snarled.

You were a mature woman, you knew violence was never the answer, you respected those older than you and their wisdom. But enough is enough…

Anger taking over you, you planted a fist onto her already bruised cheek making it swell and redden even more. The impact was strong for sure, years of pent up anger sent behind it. 

She grabbed you by the collar of your jacket and drug you down to the ground laying some punches on you. Fists flying, skin slapping, curse words being mumbled here and there. Dust and dirt was filling the air, but harsh words and phrases were filling just as heavy. It was loud and intense; you didn't even hear Joel's shouts. 

He grabbed you off of Tess, your legs were flailing and you were still trying to send punches her way. 

“I didn't deserve that! What you did was wrong! I didn’t need to be sent away!” you shouted.

Joel was doing his best to hold you back as Ellie helped her up.

“What the hell are you two doing fighting?”

You and Tess angrily stared at each other, not saying a single word. 

“Should I ask why?” he questioned. 

“She's gone crazy Joel, She attacked me.” She played the victim. 

You wiggled trying to escape Joel's grip.

“I’m not crazy, you know what you did to me was wrong, I considered you a friend!” 

You shouted.

Tess had a look of guilt on her face. She knew Joel would question your remark. 

“Tess, what is she talking about?” 

Joel questioned you still in his grip. 

“Tell him Tess. Tell him how you ratted me out to the Fireflies for being in healthcare” 

Everyone stood silent for a moment Joel's grip loosened and you slid down to your knees, spitting the blood from your mouth. 

“Tell him how you had them come and take me because you wanted to be with him.” 

Tess was silent, guilt plastered all over her face.  Joel spoke up. 

“Tess, is that true?” 

“Joel, we needed a cure.” she replied.

“So you had them come and take her away? I trusted you!” he shouted.

Ellie was standing there blank faced. 

“I don't need this shit. We need to move.”  Tess said following the trail ahead. 

Joel reached out for your hand, offering to help you up from your spot, you accepted and stood.

He cupped your face in his hands trying to inspect the wounds on your cheeks. 

You pulled yourself away quickly, careful not to let him get too close.

“And you… you lied to me. What happened to nothing has or is happening between the two of you?” you whispered, hurt seeping through your voice.

“Y/N, I-”  You instantly cut him off.

“Save it Joel, Tess is right. We need to keep moving.” The four of you continued to move forward with a heavy silence filling what felt like the whole forest ahead. 

[gay-saltasaurus]

Ok so I just finished replaying BOTW post TOTK. Not a super detailed replay, just main quests and some of the larger side content.

Now that both are fresh in my mind...what the fuck.

I am legitimately kind of terrified of the team working on these games, they might be too powerful. How did they do this. How the fuck did they manage to hit it out of the park, then come back a few years later to hit it out of the solar system. So many big games are released half finished (looking at you Pokemon), and it would have been so easy to do a cash grab sequel. So many assets, systems, and minor sidequests were reused, as expected, but instead of just making botw+, they went in 100% to build somthing huge on the impressuve foundation they already had. As someone who works in games, I can't stress enough how so many people, in so many disciplines, had to be working at the top of their game for years to pull this off twice. Nintendo also deserves praise for giving the developers the time they needed to go above and beyond (this should be standard, but unfortunately the actual standard is to drive developers to make as much money as possible as fast and as cheaply as possible).

Replaying botw really highlighted how much totk was able to improve. Botw gave the player multiple ways to solve every problem, but the Zonai devices and new abilities make the solutions practically infinite, while somehow still making things challenging. The new abilities also feel more usefull, I think I only used cryonis twice outside of shrines.

There's also the little quality of life changes. I seriously missed being able to drop weapons from the hotbar, swap out an item after opening a chest, easily switch between inventory tabs, the little things that really streamline gameplay.

Totk's story is also made a lot stronger by botw's foundation. Everyone's already talked about botw's loneliness vs totk's theme of connection. But botw also creates emotional connections that totk builds on. Tarrey Town, the construction in Castle Town, the fucking Hateno house. It's similar to the environmental storytelling in botw. And despite Link's Tony Hawk syndrome, you know these npcs. You knew the Hateno kids when they were toddlers. You get to see the people you've met thriving. You know exactly what you're fighting for.

Botw tok a minute to get me emotionally invested in saving Zelda. "Yeah save the princess, I know the drill. You've seen one Zelda you've seen them all." At first I just expected her personality would be improved from Girl to Smart Girl. Then I saw the memory of her trying to force feed Link a live frog and instantly decided I would die for this character, and needed to save her asap. She's a full fledged character with an actual arc across games! And I love her! Yes there are things that could be better, the self sacrifice and not getting to do much in the actual game is an issue, but for what we got I'm pretty pleased with it. Botw got me invested, and totk used that to maximum effect. I saved a lot of the side content because I wanted to know where Zelda was, then when I found out I just couldn't get invested in sidequests because SHE HAS BEEN UP THERE BY HERSELF FOR 10,000 YEARS HOLD ON BABYGIRL IM COMING WE'RE GONNA GET YOU DOWN SOMEHOW.

So with Totk being so good, I have to wonder what's next. First, everyone who worked on this should get a vacation and a raise. And some awards. But after that, I think it might be possible to make this a trilogy. I have no idea where you could go from here, but that's what I thought after botw and look how that turned out. But if the team feels like they're done with this iteration of Hyrule, this is a perfectly good stopping point. There is just one thing I need first. Whether it's in a sequel or a major dlc. I need this Zelda. To not be having a terrible time. Just once. I know saving Zelda is the whole thing for this series, but my god she has been through enough. Just let me go on an adventure with her. You have the technology from the sage avatars. Or if that's too much, let me go in an adventure while she hangs out with Purah or something. Nintendo I'm begging you.

HOLY FUCK THIS IS SO LONG

[kookiecrumb]

hi bestie i just wanted a maknae line x reader smut where they r reader's next door neighbours and they accidentally see y/n masterbating because she leaves her door unlocked and they decide to "help her out ;) "

p.s : if you don't do threesomes or foursomes, im totally ok w only one member !! 💗💗💗💗

😆 Bro I've gotten SO many requests for a threesome/foursome. It's very hard to technically write and I'm still figuring it out simply because there are SO many elements that need to be happening at the same time.

Think about it! You could be riding Taehyung, touching Jimin and eating Jungkook and it would be absolutely hectic to write!

That being said...

I'll write it for you, dear anon. Enjoy.

BTS Makne Line's

Service

-

warnings: smut (18+), foursome, oral (f&m), anal (f), cumshots, some degration, some praise, dubcon, toys (vibrator), masturbation, feminism talk, caught in the act, unprotected sex* (don't do this), exhibitionism, fem!reader

-

"What I'm saying is, that if we just allow for women to assume more roles of power, then the world could be a lot more organized-- hell! We could achieve world peace," Taehyung says, taking a bite out of his apple while pacing the apartment.

"That's stupid." Jungkook is hanging off the side of the bed, throwing a ball up in the air and catching it. "Everything's stupid."

"No, you're both stupid," Jimin corrects. He's standing by the oven, spreading strawberry cream cheese on a bagel. "Haven't you ever read feminist literature? It's about equality, not supremacy."

Taehyung opens his mouth to say that he knew that, but he didn't.

"Well I think that we should just decide on what we're having for dinner, and--"

"Fuuuck~"

Everyone's ears perk up. "What the fuck was that?" Jungkook breaks out into a smile.

Jimin's eyes are glued to the wall, trying to focus on finding the origin of the sound they all just heard float through the air.

Taehyung didn't hear it at first.

"Ahhhh~"

He hears it the second time around and covers his mouth. "I know you hear it too," he says.

Jimin steps toward the wall and presses his ear to it. The younger men follow suit, hopeful to hear another morsel of your moans.

"Mmmh~ mmm! Mmm..."

"She's fucking herself," Jungkook says in disbelief. "Good thing too, she's hot...she deserves it."

Taehyung's eyes light up. "You think we should help her?"

Jimin crosses his arms and shakes his head. "I don't know."

"She works at a law firm, so...she must get a lot of stressful clients daily. This might be her way of getting rid of stress," Jungkook reasons, ignoring his flaming boner.

"You're fucking hard!" Taehyung exclaims, the biggest grin spreading across his face. "Just from hearing her! That's so fucked up!"

Jimin pinches his glabella in annoyance. "Stop it." He thinks for a while, leaning against the pale, thin barrier. "We either need to tell her to be quiet, or..."

"Join?" Taehyung interrupts.

Jungkook shifts around on his feet so that his tenting cock is less evident. He tugs his pants down inconspicuously.

Jimin shakes his head, weighing their options. Finally, he sheepishly gestures a 'maybe.'

"What do you mean, maybe?" He mocks. "Jungkook here," he pats him on the shoulder, "has a super hot neighbor who is in clear need of some help, and you're gonna say maybe we should help her?!"

"Also she did call me hot like...two weeks ago at the laundry room, so...just putting that out there," Jungkook mentions, clicking his tongue.

"Ahhhh-- ahhhh," a gasping moan breaks through Jimin's thoughtful silence.

"Mmmmm...yeah she sounds hot lets do it," he sticks his tongue out playfully.

-

Jimin gestures for the men to stand back before he raps on the door to your apartment.

"It's not locked~" you sing.

"Does that mean we can come in?" Jimin asks his friends. Really, he should be asking you, but he's trying his best not to interrupt.

Taehyung pouts. "I mean..."

Jungkook pushes the both of them aside and steps into the apartment, taking off his shoes before coming in.

He rubs his palms together and glances up to find you with a ten inch dildo about seven inches into your cunt. "Whoooa..." he freezes.

You gasp in surprise at their appearances, spreading yourself further on the bed so they can all get a full view of your naked body getting fucked by a pussy-numbing vibrator.

Jimin follows him in, mesmerized by the sight. Taehyung is the last to enter, but the very first to start taking his shirt off.

"Kim Taehyung, you have no shame," Jungkook comments as he watches him strip.

"You're right," he replies as he reaches the edge of the bed, only in his boxers. "Neither should you."

You instantly begin feeling up his torso, fluttering your eyes up to his face.

Jungkook turns tomato red as he can't keep his eyes off of your body.

"You should join him," Jimin says to him, softly. "She wants all of us." With a flirty grin, he starts stripping himself and lands on the heel of the bed, undoing his belt with careful fingers.

Jungkook bites his lip.

"You're the youngest, huh?" You mewl towards Jungkook as both men kiss and suck on your body.

"I want you too," your breath spikes at Taehyung sucking a mark under your breast. "I can see you're hard..."

Jungkook runs his fingers over his apparent erection, his focus honing in on the way you push out your vibrator and press it back in. His eyes flick back to your face, smirking at him.

"You don't have to be shy, Jungkook..." you sigh, your hand resting under Jimin's face, staring deeply into his warm, brown eyes.

Taehyung strokes your sides, pulling you towards his body and moving his hips in small circles against your thigh. His head whips back in relief.

You shift around a bit until there's a clear opening for him, and he cozies up to you naturally. Jimin reaches over your body to tug at Jungkook's jean button.

Your hands fall upon Jimins thighs. You squeeze them in gratitude, smiling softly. He plants several kisses down your torso in response as Jungkook towers over your body, a little lost.

You take his hands and place them on your stomach, moaning softly as Taehyung's throbbing cock pokes out of its confinement while riding your thigh.

You fixate on it for a while, biting your lip desperately before Jimin licks a fat stripe up your pussy, making you twitch.

Jungkook takes a hold of the toy, pumping it in and out of your pussy, keeping a firm pace. You sigh, feeling his knuckles brush over your folds as he does so.

You break out into a relaxed smile and pull Taehyung to your face, kissing him passionately as your hips buck up to meet Jimin's hot tongue. Your fingers card through his beautiful black curls, moaning against his lips.

"Your friend here can fuck," you breathe into him, riding your hand down his torso. "Ahh,"

Jungkook stretches his body to the side, reaching for the lube before handing it to you. You thank him and tug down his pants until his juicy cock springs out. You immediately attach your mouth to it and kiss it lewdly.

Jimin plants a small kiss on your cunt and takes the lubricant from your side, pulling himself out and drizzling a generous amount on his pretty dick. Your fingers stumble on his abdomen before wrapping around his cock and pumping languidly.

He kneels and groans, his breathing long and heavy.

Jungkook sheepishly pulls his pants down, pulling your buzzing vibrator out of your cunt and slapping his dick on your folds. He chases his immediate relief, pressing and grinding against your warmth. "She's so wet," he sighs, euphorically.

This sets off a chain of groans among the boys, each fucking themselves into one of your many holes. You feel your body heating up, the sight of all three bodies using you this way. Fuck, you love being a slut.

Jimin kneels over your face as you stroke him firmly, watching his face contort in pleasure while your throat gets used by Taehyung.

You latch off of his girth and tap Jimin's shaft against your cheek, playfully. "Mm," you hum.

Without warning, Jungkook lifts your legs and carefully inserts his cock inside of you, sedating your throbbing need. You readjust your hips for him, aligning your cervix with his tip.

Taehyung busies his mouth on your collar, his articulated hands roughly pumping his dick. Jungkook's grip on your waist tightens as he thrusts vigorously.

You remove Jimin's cock from your mouth with a quiet pop. His thumb drags your bottom lip and your tongue follows. He smirks, traveling back down to ask Jungkook something.

Curiously, you sit up on your elbows to view all three men congregating.

"I can't believe you want to rock, paper, scissors over this," Taehyung laughs.

"We should just let Y/N choose," Jungkook adds. Jimin pouts, indicating his indifference.

"I know what I want. He's right," you gesture towards the guy currently mangling your insides.

Jungkook returns a cocky grin to his best friends and nods towards you.

"Well, tell us then..." Taehyung hums.

"Where do you want us?" Jimin teases.

Several moments later you find yourself in the following position:

Jungkook is under you, his dick nestled inside your pulsing cunt. His hands are splitting your cheeks apart for Taehyung who is doing shameless backshots in your ass while Jimin is raw-fucking your throat.

You roll your eyes back as you feel nothing but the sound of your beating heart, your own breath, and the wet warmth of their fucking bodies.

Your legs shake every time Jungkook snaps his hips back up to penetrate you. Taehyung stretches and numbs you, causing you to feel almost drunk at the feeling of his massive cock.

Jimin has plunged into your throat at a mindful rhythm, reminding you to breathe correctly. Your tongue is spread against his underside so that you catch every melting drop of his sweet cum as it flows from him.

Jungkook feels Taehyung through your walls and competes to match his pace while your eyes begin to water from choking on Jimin's girth.

They synchronize in rhythm, one slutty groan after another eruption of delectation. You've never felt so full in your life. It's an overwhelmingly arousing experience, and you're sure you're about to orgasm at least three different ways.

You tap Jimin's thigh three times, signaling you're about to cream all over Jungkook's dick.

It hits.

The contractions are so strong that they trigger Taehyung's immediate orgasm.

He cums first, hard, followed immediately by Jungkook and then Jimin.

Taehyung tosses a random towel at Jimin and gets one for himself, lowering himself out of you, pleased with the mess of white cum spilling out of your hole.

Jungkook pinches his face as he pulls out, panting loudly as his entire body goes limp.

"Such a dirty little thing aren't you," Jimin praises as he taps the crown of his cock on your white-tinted tongue. He leans to your face and kisses your cheek.

"I thought we weren't objectifying women!" Taehyung speaks out, having watched the interaction.

Jungkook quietly rolls his eyes.

-

a/n: this will take some getting used to...but i think i did okay.

[simpinforyoongi]

Hey that's my water! ~ Shy!Jungkook x reader

Pairing: Jungkook x reader

Genre: fluff?? A bit of angst mAYBe like 0.002%, attempted humour but like, IDK how to make things funny ok don't attack me

Summary: Jungkook finished all your water while kinda confessing and you just ask him to give you time to get to know him. (and you're hoping that he doesn't change his mind)

{Note: This is my first imagine on Tumblr and I'd really appreciate any feedback and comments and notes. Thank you for reading. I hope you enjoy it!!}

{p.s guess where the picture is from!}

~~~~~~~

Don't look. Don't look. Don't look. Don't look. Don-

You peek at the confused boy to your right who sighs for the umpteenth time in the past hour.

Focus y/n focus . It's your finals.

You look back down to your half finished paper and start writing again, but not before taking yet another sneek peek at him.

You know, seeing such behavior of yours, one would think that you're crushing on this cute boy, Jungkook.

Well, it's not fuLLY wrong, I mean, he's kinda cute,ok. But its not quite true either.

Well its just, its hard to resist such a baby face and honey-sweet charms, okay?? And the fact that you're a hoe for shy boys isn't helping at all

I'd say you're giving exams a run for their money when it comes to being avoided by Jungkook.

I mean the guy hasn't held eye contact with you ever for more than half a second!

That day when you bumped into each other? Nopity. One second he was there with books sprawled across the floor and the next second he wasn't. He didn't even look at you!

Then there was that time when the only seat available was next to you and the rest were near his "fangirls". Its fair to say he shared his meal with squirrels that day.

And then there was that day when the teacher had asked you to explain something to him since she was in a hurry and you were the only one left in class. That was probably the only time he directly talked to you.

By "talk" , I mean the low "yes" when you asked whether he had understood or not. That's it.

Those were the only times when you interacted. In the past year.

And that last time was like 4-5 months ago.

Weird, considering the fact that you share a good number of classes with him. Well maybe he's just too shy, don't stress over it you dumbass.

You put your pen down and stretch out. One gets stiff after sitting in the same position for so long you know.

15 minutes are still left on the clock.

Jungkook still seems to be writing.

Your eyes linger on his face for longer than you'd like to admit.

Ok but like

Damn

he has a sharp jawline.

Slice my throat with that jaw please

But still those chubby soft looking cheeks? Howww?? Then there are those doe eyes that hold the soft chocolate brown orbs.

Oh how you'd love to stare at them for hours on end. And tangle your fingers in the soft brown locks that are hiding his forehead. Your eyes wander down to the sweet brown pools of caramel that I mentioned a moment ago and you can't seem to avert your eyes from his.

.

.

wait.

.

He's looking at you.

.

Y/N HE'S LOOKING AT YOU

You instantly turn back around and stare your paper with such intensity that if looks could burn, the flimsy piece of paper would've been long gone by now.

Well that's an amazing way to initiate contact. Great job!

Since that creepy eye contact, you didn't even dare look at his general direction

Unknown to you, he was smiling since he caught you staring at him with a hint of a dreamy smile.

He thought you looked cute with blood rushing to your cheeks.

He should try to make you flustered more often. Actually he should've tried a lot of things.

But him being a wimp is getting in his way of even looking at you nicely.

After revising your paper, you hand it in and head out.

Anyways

yeET FINALS ARE OVERRR

Walking to the entrance, you make a list of all the delicious food you're gonna eat and get fat now while binge watching all the dramas that had to be kept on hold due to exam season TT

BUT FINALLY ITS OVER SNSMMDMD

YEEEHEE

The sun suddenly seemed brighter and the sky seemed bluer.

you put in your earphones and settled on a favorite after much thought.

Ah life is sweet

And then it isn't

As you neared the entrance, a group of boys caught your eye. What surprised you more than them staring at you was the fact that Jungkook was one of them.

They immediately went back to talking amongst themselves.

Huh

Anyyyywaaaayyysss its time to PARTAYYY

So there you were, minding your own business, skipping along the song and mouthing the words.

You know, beautiful life.

But this peace didn't last long when your tranquil venture was interrupted by heavy and fast footsteps behind you.

Oh shit what if its a kidnapper. Oh shit oh shit oh shit

Instinctively, you looked behind.

Jungkook

Oh wait it's Jungkook. Hah not a kidnapper.

Oh wait

its JUNGKOOK

What if he's here to talk about the weird eye contact.

OhMY GOD OH MY GOD OY MY GOD OH MY GOD OHMY-

He stopped right in front of you and you swore your heart would leap out and break dance in front of you any moment now.

He glanced behind him at a black van.

Oh wait maybe he IS here to kidnap me.

Good as long as the weird eye contact isn't brought up.

He looks back at you and you're like ????

He says hey

You say hi

And then you're just standing there.

He again looks back at that kidnapping van and this time some of those boys from earlier stick their heads out and give him a thumbs up and you're again like ????

"So ummm.. hehe.." Jungkook looks away from you and your hoe-for-shy-boys side is just really to jUMp out of your skin and on him

"hey you tryna kidnap me or something" you smile, trying to ease his extrEMely visible tension thats being emitted from him in squiggly Iines like those in cartoons and stuff

but you're like honestly confused???when he keeps opening his mouth and closing it like a fish trying to breath in air

and as cruel as it sounds but you haTE it when someone interrupts your music sessions and its not an exception this time either,

even though the reason of interruption is extremely pretty and you're entertained just by looking at him

"...heyyy??"

"oh um... well..its just.."

"You know what nevermind Jungkook. I'll do the rest"

you look to your right and

its one of those boys

and boYY HE'S just as pretty as Jungkook if not more and you'd think you're drooling but actually you're quite a composed lady so you just normally very un-creepily look at him.

Composed lady my as-

"Hi I'm Namjoon. I'm Jungkook's friend. And I'm just here to-"

"Hi iM YOUR HOPE YOU'RE MY HOPE IM J HOPEEE"

"Hobi cAlm down you're not calling yourself that"

"hiii excujje meee I'm Jimin nice to meet you y/n"

"jimin calm down and get insi- TAE DON'T PUSH JIMIN LIKE THAT"

"GoddAMnit I'm being sqUISHED you guys let me breath-"

"ah sorry hyung but its y/nnnnnn"

"thats not an excuse to FRIGGIN KILL ME Jimin!"

"i said I'm sorry hyung but come out meet y/n"

"wait but let me breaTHsjnxxn hoBIII"

"GUYS CALM THE HECK DOWN YOU'RE SCARING HER" namjoon yelled.

wow

Ok

"umm we're really sorry. Please gimme a sec" and then he was like guys get the frick in or I'll personally kick your asses to the moon and it was supposed to be a whisper but you heard it lolol

So you're standing there like.. ok hi nice to meet you all Im y/n and wait how exactly do you know my name again???

"Jungkook talks so muc-"

"aaAAAHHHA BBBBSHHH ye ye i told them about you haha ye ye that's why they know" and he's like furiously sweating and stuttering and you're like waah ok ok calm down I don't want you having a heart attack or something good god

"Anyways, hi I'm Namjoon and I'm a friend of Kookie here" he smiles and OH THOSE GOOD FREAKING DIMPLES SOMEONE DROWN ME IN THEM

"kindly ignore these savages here" and you find that really funny so you're like "lolol that's fine XD XD haha" and smiling and all

The rest of them introduce themselves and by the end, your name just sounds unreal because of all the "hey I'm y/n"s and did i mention each of them is like.. a freaking living masterpiece?? and like so so sweet, except the Yoongi guy, he's a bit quite but you can't judge because you're like that most of the times too but you're an amazing person and so might be he .

then you ask them why they are here

"so actually, we're here because," he looks at Jungkook, "Jungkook is a coward."

"huh???"

"well you seem like a sweet girl and we decided we'd get Jungkook to ask you to hangout but he is of course a coward and thats why I had to pipe in to save him because Jungkook really likes you a lot an-"

"AAAAAAAAABABABA BALAKLAVA CHOCOLATE CAKE BANANA MILK yes hyung I'll handle this you leave" and he's just pushing all of them back in the van like a sack of potatoes despite their protests and then they just...take off??

What the-?

"ehh??"

"um..ijustwannaaskifyouwannahangoutsometimemaybeifyouwant" his eyes are closed and nose is crinkled and you just wanna SQUISH SQUISH SQUISH HIS GHADDAMNED FACE

"uh what?"

"i..i just wanna..askifyouwannahangoutsometime"

"umm?? Sorry could you please speak a tad slower??"

and he seems like he's suffocated now, like his ears are just red and sweating even more and honestly he's worrying you now

"dude you okay?? You seem really red. Here have some water" Dude. Yes. You're cool unlike those fanfic girlies with their blushing and stuttering. You're a complete badass actua-

He takes the bottle from your hand and gulps everything down and you're just like hey thats my water! but you gave it to him to drink so you can't really say anything

and okay he really seems like a fish who just got dropped in a bowl of water after being on land for 3 days

yea wait that won't work he'd die so like

he really seems like a fish who got dropped in water after being on land for like 3 minutes

So ok he seems human now

"yes you were saying?"

"Uh...do you..um.. would you wanna hangout sometime? If you're free that is.. only if you want to though" and he's like blushing a little and just so cute and you just nsndnfnfkwk

But you're also like OoO

"i-i mean d-dont worry its not like a date or anything i mean if you want it can be a date but i don't think you want that so like its just normal two people hanging out and its just like I really like you you're really cute and i just wanna hangout and just-" he takes a deep breath

"uhh.." you look down.

He just kinda confessed to you so you're kinda ?!?!?!?! right now but you also don't like dating and stuff because? Why would you waste your time on someone when in the end you're gonna just get your heart broken and like, yea that might not happen but you'd just rather sleep

But like, this weird voice at the back of your head says that you should go for it even though you're breaking your rules but like rules are made to be broken you know but you're also scared but you really don't wanna say no to him cos

well you kinda maybe a little bit like him ok?

"uumm.." your brain still can't form coherent sentences

"it's ok. Don't worry." He says and you look up and he has this sad expression and you're like NXNFFDND DON'T BE SAD PLEASE HEAR ME OUT but of course you say that in a more composed way

Ms. Composed lady

"no Jungkook that's not what i mean um.. actually.." so you explain how you think its a waste of time and stuff and you also explain that you really really really wanna get to know him more

"so..can you give me some time? Please?? So at least I can have you as a friend if you don't like me anymore later??" and he seems to be thinking and you blurt out the first thing that comes to mind

"I'll take you for ice-cream!!" and that seems to convince him

"and banana milk too??"

"sure"

And the sweetest little smile dawns on his lips and he's just nodding his head and you're just UwU

"but you finished all my water though."

[leelee10898]

Fast cars & Freedom: Bad Liar (12/?)

The end of summer zoo trip has arrived, as tensions run high will the trip be a disaster? Catch up HERE

Pairings: Logan x Ellie, Colt x Ellie

Rating: Mature

Ellie had gotten herself in well over her head again. After Logan told her what he wanted, and the blow up with Colt. She made herself busy with work, and spending her free time with Luca. She had been looking forward to the zoo trip all summer, but that morning she woke up dreading the day. She had minimal contact with Colt, and Logan was often at the track preparing for a big race coming up. She got up and got herself ready before waking Luca up. Once luca was ready they went down and had breakfast. Ellie sat there picking at her muffin, not having much of an appetite, and her stomach was flopping all over the place.

“Hey guys. We're sorry but we're not going to make it to the zoo today.” Ellie gave her dad a confused look. “Um ok. Not that I didn't want you guys to come but, it was only supposed to be The four of us. Luca, logan, colt and I.”

“oh Logan invited us the other day. But, sally and I are going away for the day.” Frank grabbed a cup of coffee while the frustration swirled in Ellies head. “You ok kiddo? You look a little pale.” Ellie shook her head “Yeah, im fine just, my nerves are shot.”

“Grampy, I'm going to the zoo today. I'm going to see Lions and pandas and tigers and hiphopitamuses.” she grinned, Ellie and Frank chuckling at the mispronunciation. “You mean hippopotamus’s” Frank snickered. “Yeah, that's what I said hiphopitamuses. Silly grampy.”

“Well you have fun. And don't let the monkeys fling poop at you.” Frank waved. “Dad! Seriously?” Ellie scolded him. He stuck out his tongue and walked out the door.

Ellie and Luca drove alone, meeting Logan and Colt there. After a 2 hour drive they pulled into the parking area of the zoo, meeting Colt at the gate. “Colt.” Luca went running, a wide smile spread across his face “Hey princess.” he scooped her up in a hug. “Hi Colt.” Ellie walked up to the too. “Ellie.” He acknowledged her. He still was angry, her stomach churned again, the stress was eating at her. “Hey Luca, Hey Ellie, you guys made it finally.” Logan came walking up, Ellie turned towards his voice glad he was there but her face falling slightly seeing Stacie standing next to him. “Oh, hey Stacie I didn't expect to see you here.”

“Oh, yeah Logan asked me to tag along.  Riya and Darius couldn't make it.” Stacie grinned.

Ellie chewed the inside of her cheek, trying not to say something she might regret.

They paid for their tickets and made their way into the zoo. Luca was ecstatic,  she loved the zoo and Ellie would often take her back on the East coast. She would always tell her how her parents would take her when she was a little girl, and her favorite animals to see were the otters.  Logan was just as excited as Luca he had never been to the zoo before. They walked around coming up to the Arctic Fox. "Wow, so pretty. Its fur is snow white." Ellie marveled at the beautiful animal before her. "Well, its white what did you expect." Colt snorted, Ellie shot him a dirty look. "Let's move on." Stacie suggested, sensing the tension.  

They walked up to the baboons, they watched them run around and jump, playing with each other.  Ellie stood next to Colt, who had Luca on his shoulders, her gaze set on Logan standing with Stacie. His hand planted on her shoulder as he stood behind her, pointing things out.she watched as Stacie laughed, and then playfully slapped his chest.

"Ok. Let's move on." Ellie snapped, they all looked at her as she quickly turned making her way to the next animal.

They stood in front of  the penguin display. "OOH penguins, I love penguins Colt. Get closer. " Luca tugged on his hair. "Ouch. Alright, Alright. I'll move closer." Logan stood next to Ellie and Stacie. "Awe look at the babies." Stacie swooned. "Did you know the father hatches the egg while the mother hunts?" Logan crossed his arms, pleased with his input. "Oh yeah? Where did you hear that?" Stacie quirked her brow, Logan gave her a lopsided grin "happy feet." Ellie rolled her eyes annoyed.  Stacie was her friend, but why did Logan invite her on their family outing, or for lack of better terms, dysfunctional family outing?

Of course you'd be impressed by that Ellie mumbles under her breath.  Colt cocked his head to the side.  "Something bothering you Elle?"

"NO." she snapped.

"You know most penguins go through life with one partner. Once they find them, they never seperate." Ellie shot him an unamused look. "If only some humans were like that." He focus on her as he spoke.  "Come on squirt, lets go look at the giraffe's."

Ellie stood there alone a minute while everyone followed colt. She could feel her stomach churning again. This was not how she anticipated the day going. Once she semi composed herself she joined the others.

After an afternoon of snide remarks and jabs between the 3 of them Ellie finally had her fill. They were standing in line to get drinks. It was hot, and tensions were running high. "Can we go see the tigers? Mommy, I want to see the polar bears, you promised we could see the polar bears. When Can we see something else. " Luca whined.

"Luca, we will go in a minute. Calm down and let stacie get her drink." Ellie snapped. "Whoa Ellie calm down. Are you mad about something?" Logan questioned as Ellie stood there, mouth agape "Seriously Logan?" She threw her hands up in the air "Why did you invite Stacie here?"

"I didn't think it would be a problem." Ellie rolled her eyes. "Of course not. Nothing is ever a problem. This was supposed to be a family outing. Is. Is something going on with you and Stacie?" She pointed at him, just as Stacie walked up. "No, were just friends Ellie." Logan said in defense prompting stacie to chime in "Ellie, I told you I would never do that to you."

"Why do you care so much Ellie? You want to be with Logan?" Colt broke his silence. The four began to argue amongst themselves for a few minutes, finally Ellie spoke up "I'm done with this. Come on Luca, lets let's go see the polar bears." She turned looking for Luca, she was nowhere to be found. "Luca? LUCA!" she shouted panic setting in.

"Luca." Logan shouted, still not getting a response.  Ellie began to hyperventilate colt on her immediately "Ellie, Elle I need you to calm down. We're gonna find her. Breathe in." He looked up "Logan, go look by the polar bear enclosure, and then to the Lions.  Stacie, go tell a staff member we have a missing child." The two nodded and took off.

"Colt, my baby. What if we." Ellie sobbed.

"Hey, calm down. We're gonna find her, trust me." He pulled her into a tight embrace, calming her down. "Now, is there anywhere else she would go?" Ellie's eyes went wide "Hippos."

Colt grabbed her hand as they took off running, darting around the other visitors. They came upon the Hippo enclosure, their eyes darted around before Colt locked eyes on the small brunette child "Luca." She shouted, she turned smiling at him. "Ellie, I got her." He shouted as he scooped her up in his arms. "Luca, you scared us. You can't wander off sweetheart."

"Lulu, oh thank god. Baby you can't wander off, you scared us to death." The three stood ellie and colt holding onto her for dear life.  

Logan and Stacie ran up, thankful she was ok. A slight pained look on his face as he watched the interaction between the three. "I'll go and inform the staff we found her." Stacie gave his shoulder a squeeze as she parted. Logan made his way to the trio "Thank god you found her. Hey lulu, you really gave us a scare." Luca reached over for Logan. "Are you mad at me uncle Logie?" Logan chuckled "no. I'm glad you're ok. But you can't wander off like that ok."

They decided to call it a day after that. Luca having school the next morning. Both men agreeing to come see her off. As Ellie put Luca to bed that night the day replaying in her head. How did things get so screwed up. Was there really something going on between Stacie and Logan? She knew Colt was upset about the divorce, but the way he stepped up and took control of the situation made her really believe he would be a good dad, if he was Lucas father. And the few minutes Luca was gone terrified her, it was just a few minutes but it felt like a lifetime. The nagging nauseous feeling crept back up again, she couldn't wait for it to be all over, the divorce,  the paternity results. She laid down, tossing and turning in bed most of the night.

The next morning she woke up, got Luca ready and sure enough both Colt and Logan were there to see her off. Luca was excited to start school, she excelled in preschool,  and placed much higher than a kindergarten level on her school entrance test. Though she most likely got her smarts from her mother, Colt was also very smart, and Logan really showed his intellectual side during the study date with Riya and Darius all those years ago. She would definitely be a force to be reckoned with in school, that was for sure.

Ellie took the day off of work, she knew she wouldn't be productive with her mind occupied with Luca being at school. She spent the day wandering around the house,  cleaning up, unpacking boxes she still hadn't gotten around to. If she were being honest with herself she was also trying to block out the fact the court date was the next week. She often found herself wondering if she were making a mistake,  and every time she wondered it, Dracys words popped in her head. He loved Luca, he really seemed like he would be a good dad. But what if being a family wasn't enough? What if he turned out to be just like Kaneko, wanting more, the crew again. She took a deep breath, allowing herself to think those thoughts brought back the familiar nauseous feeling. She took a deep breath calming herself down,  she would cross that bridge when the time came, only if she were Colts.

Before she knew it, it was almost time to get Luca from the bus. Logan had a race he coming up, so he had to take off right after they got Luca on the bus. Colt however, would be there. Ellie sat on the front patio waiting when she heard the familiar sound of a bike coming down the street. She watched  him as he pulled into the driveway. She always loved the way he looked when he rode. He had traded in his old leather jacket for a new one, his shoulders broader than when he was 19 going on 20. He was still as fit as ever, ellies mind flashed back to the night they hooked up, her hands pressed against his muscular chest. She bit her lip at the thought,  his impossibly tight shirt not helping the situation as he walked towards her . "I knew you would be out here already." He smirked as he walked onto the porch. "Yeah, how'd you know that." She tilted her head at him. "Because you're always like an hour early for everything."

He was right, and she couldn't believe he remembered.

"You ever think you'll go back to a car?" She asked.

"Not anytime soon," He chuckled "Guess I'll have to use one of the cars I Have sitting around for when I have Luca."

"I miss it." Colt eyed her "miss what? The bike? You want that too?"

"NO. I miss the riding. The thrill, the feeling." A blush crept up on her cheeks she prayed he didn't notice.

"Let's take a ride. " He stood holding out his hand. Ellie hesitated "I ahhh. I dont know, Luca-"

"will be off the bus in 45 minutes, we have time. Come on, we have plenty of time." Ellie contemplated for a split second, before an old feeling she had tucked away ignited her body. "Let's do it." She jumped up following him to the bike. They climbed on and he fired up the bike.

She wrapped her arms around his waist tightly, her head rested against his back. She watched as the scenery flew by in a blur, the sound of his peaceful breathing putting her at ease. She missed this more than she thought, she needed just one last ride before she closed that chapter of her life completely. They drove for about twenty minutes and then came back to the house. They got off the bike, "thanks. I needed that." Ellie smiled as they walked together to the patio. "Yeah  anytime." He sat down fidgeting with his thumbs. "I'm leaving town Elle." He blurted out. Ellie felt her heart drop into her stomach. "Colt. We have court, and what about Luca?" She was shocked, she couldn't believe he would just leave.

"I can't go to court, I can't go and I won't.  If I go, I will contest it all. But if I leave, you'll get what you want,  you'll be happy." He turned looking at her "That's all I want for you El, to be happy, that is all I ever wanted. I'll tell Luca, it's not forever,  just until after the court date." His voice cracking a little, she could tell he was giving everything he had not to break down, she had seen it once before, the night his father died. She tried to do the same but her eyes failed her terribly.  "Colt I. I'm sorry." She began to sob, a wave of emotion crashing over her. She hated this, she hated all of this. Why couldn't he of just got the annulment 6 years ago, why did she still have to care about them both?

"Ellie please don't cry, please." His voice wavering more. As he pulled her into a hug. "What. About. The test results,  what if they call?" She sniffled. "You call me, text me leave me a voicemail. Its shotty connection so I may not get them right away. If for some reason i can't get there, and she's not mine, just don't call me and tell me." Ellie shook her head. "When will you leave?"

"This weekend, friday morning. Just  for a week."

Before they knew it the bus pulled up. They were greeted by a bright eyed, big smile little girl. "Mooooomy, coooolt." She flew into Ellies arms almost knocking her over. "Whoa." Ellie goggled, steadying herself. "Did you have a good day?" "I had the best day ever!" She ran to colts arms as he scooped her up twirling her around. "Hey sweetheart, what did you do today?" He put her down as they sat down "Well my teacher tried to teach us counting today and they only had us count to 20. I said that's it?"

"Oh yeah? Well what did she say?" Colt cocked his brow, knowing Luca she gave this teacher a run for her money. "Well she said that we would work on counting past 20 later on in the year. So I said, lady I can count past 20 with no problem." They looked to her to finish.  "And she said oh yeah, that's excellent what can you count to? And then I said um like 1,000. So she didn't believe me so I started counting." Her face going somber "She. She cut me off at 497." Ellie and Colt both looked to each other and laughed.

"That's amazing squirt. You are so smart, just like mommy." Colts sincere gaze met her eyes. "Hey Luca. I have to tell you something ok?" Luca looked up at him "I just wanted to let you know that I have to go out of town for a little bit."

"You're leaving?" She sniffled.  "Yeah but not til Friday, and just a few days."

"Will you put me on the bus every morning?" She batted her tiny little lashes, Just like her mom, he was a sucker for it and Colt was warped around her tiny little fingers. "Yes I will."

"And get me off the bus?" Ellie chuckled, she was persuasive.

"Of course, wouldn't miss it for the world." Colt hugged her.

The week flew past, she missed Logan and wasn't sure what to do about him. Could she really divorce Colt and then date Logan? Was that even fair? Would she lose him forever? Could she handle that? Friday morning Colt came to put Luca on the bus, Ellie thought it best if he did it alone, it would be hard on them both when he left. Just a few short days and it would be over, but was she ready? Only time would tell.

Colt drove the biggest part of the day. Fighting back the urge to turn around and show up to that court house next week.  He needed to push through to get to his destination and try to clear his mind.

After almost 8 hours he pulled into the Lake Tahoe area. Up a gravel driveway to a nice cabin that sat by the lake. The woman stood there hands on her hips,  "Bout time you came up here to see me."

"Hey Mom."

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[queenattheopera]

Opening Number, Part 5

Prompt: This is the story of the band that skyrocketed beside Queen and how their singer was fated to be with one of them.

Warning: Cussing and implied smut

If you want to catch up with previous parts they’re linked on my Masterlist in my bio

January 1, 1971

If it weren’t for the enticing smell of food I don’t think I would’ve considered leaving my bed. Sitting up I could feel my head pounding. I grimsed and closed my eyes. I refused to move for a few seconds. I could feel the intense pounding in the back of my head, it me a few deep breaths to find some relief but i knew that wasn't going to last. So I tried to redirect my attention to recalling what happened last night.

I took some shots, danced with Fred, and then I made out with someone. I couldn't seem to remember who it was but I remember how their hands felt as they roamed my body. I remember their lips exploring just as much as their hands did. I remember the smell of alcohol in their breath and how intoxicating their scent was. I sighed and opened my eyes. The noise in the kitchen hadn't stopped but I was too nervous to see who was causing it.

Who do i want it to be?

As I pushed myself off my mattress, I was met with nothing but cold air. I pulled the comforter off the bed and wrapped myself with it. As I'm tried taking the first few steps away from the bed frame I began to limp. Sore could barely describe how my legs felt. As I try to move further the blanket gets caught on something, not caring enough to find out I decide to yank it. I heard something fall but it didn't sound broken so I continued to make my way towards the mysterious figure in my home. The closer I got the more anxious I became. I could feel my heart begin to race. As it sped up more and more, it was all I could hear. I was about to turn into the kitchen when they stepped out.

I froze and forced myself to make eye contact with the them.

“...Noah?”

“I was wondering when you would get out of bed.” My stomach dropped. I don't think i slept with him, right? Not that he's not attractive, but he's my best friend. “Are you okay? You left really early last night, I mean I don't think you got any sleep going from the bags under your eyes.” I don't want to look at him because I felt beyond embarrassed but I need to know what happened last night.

“Wait so we didn't..?” He was silent for a few seconds before beginning to laugh, “Wow you must have been fucked up if you really thought that we would ever do anything.I mean no offense-” Before he could finish I punch his shoulder. “Shut up!” I feel my face growing warmer but I was relieved that he wasn’t the open who I had slept with.

“What the hell are you doing here anyway?” He walks towards the dining room but I don't make any move to follow him. “Cmon, at least take a look to see what I did.” Rolling my eyes I begin to make my way over while trying to hide the extremely obvious limp with the comforter. I'm sure he noticed after he snorted but he didn't say anything.

“Ta-da! I made you a birthday breakfast!” Seeing the table setup my eyes begin to water. He had made all my favorite foods and there were even a few gifts in the corner of my room. I looked at him and he had the biggest proudest smile plastered on his face. He was admiring his work but his smile disappeared when he saw that I began to cry.

“What happened? Did I do something wrong? I mean I know it's just me but I remember you told me not to tell anyone else and that you usually celebrate alone. I just thought you would like this.” I laughed at his rambling and wiped the tears away.

“It’s fine Noah, It's actually perfect, I just haven't really had a party or anything since my parents passed away. I- um Thank you..” His demeanor changed, and instead of getting a look of pity, he smiles and gives me a hug. “Why don't you go clean up and get dressed so we could eat and you could open your gifts okay?” I nod and go back to my room.

Walking back towards my room I see a puddle, I guess when the blanket got stuck I had knock over a glass of water resting on my nightstand. Bending down to pick up the glass I find a piece of paper under my bed.

Sorry I couldn't stay love. Let me make it up to you. I’ll pick you up tonight around 9. -hbsdcbaib I reread the paper a few times, then I just stared at the smug as I tried to decipher whose name was written.

I want to scream. I feel nothing but anger towards myself. If I hadn't spilled that water on the note than I would have known exactly who the I slept with last night. Instead my lover is faceless.

There was nothing I could do but wait. I grab some clothes and head towards the bathroom. Before I entered, I let the blanket fall than close the door. I standing in front of the mirror I take in every detail. My eyes look much worse than to what Noah had led me to believe. Then there was my neck and chest. I was covered in bite marks and hickies. When I turned to step into the bath tub I could feel some tenderness in my hips. Looking down I see bruises, resembling someone's hands. When looking at my legs, I’m met with two more hickies.

Ignoring the achiness I take a hot shower. As I'm standing there I think back to last night. I remember the passion and roughness that my counterpart used. When he had me against the wall or when his head was between my legs. He was confident with very move. He worshiped my body. Together we fit like puzzle pieces. I could feel the heat between my legs begin to intensify. I push it away and finish my shower. After I'm dressed I look into the mirror. I know Noah has seen most the marks on my neck but I still had the urge to cover them. I grabbed some makeup and covered most of them. The others were too dark to hide so I grabbed a turtle neck from my closest and changed. Satisfied with eth look I walked back toward the dining room.

“Finally, do you know how hard it was to have all this food but not to be able to eat any of it.” I laugh and sit down across from him. I don't say anything as I grab a fork and stab the food in the plate. None of it ever makes it into my mouth a dn instead just gets moved around. I could feel Noah's concerned gaze on me but neither of say anything. He comes around the table and bends down to my height.

“Did something happen? If something did you don't have to tell me, but just know that I'm here for you. And if it was one of the guys, I swear I'll kill them.” I smile and roll my eyes. “No you won't, you'll have Em do it.” He laughs but he still looks worried. I sighed, i think back to last night. “I was um, um I was almost attacked last night.” I can't bring myself to look up at him, I was embarrassed, blaming myself for what could’ve happen.

“Who?” I look at him and i'm surprised by how intense his gaze his. A few tears slip out, my anxiety and stress had finally taken hold of the wheel. “Don’t worry about it, Im fine, it was nothing. Its what happened after. Roger saved me. Then Brian and John comforted me. Then i slept with someone and I don't even know how. They left a fucking note that I ruined so now I have no idea who it was from. I’m confused and I don't know what to do and my head hurts and -” I couldn't finish my sentence because I began to cry. Well I was actually sobbing. This only increased the pain I was feeling and it made me feel weak and powerless.

Noah holds me and doesn't say anything. He pulls away when I had started to calm down. “Its okay, it's going to be okay. Let's figure this out. You should eat, I'm going to call the gang and Freddie.”

After sitting there for a minute or two began to eat. I don't have much of an appetite but I forced myself to eat and drink a glass of water. When Noah came back he cleaned up and began to hide the gifts. I silently thanked him for still considering how I felt about my birthday. Just as we had finished cleaning up there was a knock at the door. It must have been Fred because everyone else had a key.

I walked towards the order. I was happy when I noticed that i could walk normally despite the ache. When I opened the door the first thing Freddie did was gasp. “Oh you poor thing! Come here love.” Freddie pulled me into a hug. I guess the crying made my makeup run and that's why he gasped. He didn’t say anything. All he did was shush me an rub my back. It was actually really comforting. When I pulled away freddie began to fix my hair. I smiled softly before taking his hand off my hair. I led him inside. “Thanks for coming Freddie, I'm sorry if you were busy, we shouldn't have called.” I didn't want to be another and I wasn't feeling my best. Frankly I didn't have the energy to be my usually bubbly self. “Nonsense darling, I'll always be here for you.” He rubs my shoulder and gives me the biggest smile.

“Alright love, since we dont know whos coming to pick you up, let's get you dolled up.”

“Lets get her comfortable first, Y/n, we know youre probably aren't feeling up to anything right now so here's what we're gonna do. You're going to take some pain medication, take a nap then we'll get you ready okay.” Emily had let herself in and was beginning to take charge. Usually Fred and her would annoy each other but after their silent communication Freddie turned to me and smiled. “She's right love, get some rest.” I looked between the too and nodded. Once I was in my room I began to run last night over and over again. I felt stupid, I got drunk last night for a reason, now I'll have to live with the haunting my actions for the rest of my life.

“Hey y/n, Em told me to give this to you.” Charlie handed me the medicine and sat at the foot of my bed. “I know how you are. I know you're blaming yourself right now but I also know that it's not. You're okay. We're here for you.” I took the pills and nodded. “Thank you.”

In the next few hours while I slept, my house guests cleaned and prepared everything for me. They had set aside an outfit they knew I would like and they spoke about how they would help me feel better.

When I woke up my headache was alleviated and I felt more nervous than ever. I stood up to find an outfit set hanging on my closet door. I put it on and reapplied my make-up. When i walked out of my bedroom I found the gang in my living room playing scrabble.

“Y/n you're up!” I walk to them and Noah gets up and offers me his spot. He then walks away. I turn to the others looking for soe response as to what they're doing.

“It's your turn.” When i look u at them, i realize they are speaking to me. I make a calculated move. Noah comes back with some tea. They don't bring up anything from yesterday and instead play a friendly game of scrabble. Their passive actions put me at ease. I became so focused on the game I forgot about yesterday. It was what Emilly planed. They distracted me, they took my focus away from all the bad and gave me a moment of peace.

Before I knew it, t was 8:50. “Alright y/n, your dates gonna get be here but were going to be in the bedroom. They’ll be here soon. I know you're going to be nervous, but if you ever feel uncomfortable, just know we're here for you.” “Yes darling, and if any of the boys do anything, then ill kick their arses. You know I was pretty good boxer.” I smile and nod. “Thank you, I mean in.” I pull Em and Fred into hug. Charlie and Noah don't hesitate to join. I watch as they walk into the bedroom and close the door. I take deep breaths but I could feel myself getting nervous all over again. I'll admit it's not as bad as before but I was still really anxious. I was spacing in the living room while trying to relax.

I jumped when I heard a knock at the door. I was frozen and I stopped breathing for a second. When they knocked again I let out my the breath I was holding in. I moved cautiously towards the door. I unlocked the door and put my hand on the doorknob. Here goes nothing.

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[kyunsies]

Hello Mädch ahsdjaksdh <3 !!

how is college going? dw, I hope you are settling in super well and feeling optimistic about school and all the amazing things I know you are going to achieve this year! I am excited that you are starting your rotations now! you are going to do awesome, I know it! I'm sorry that you didn't get that ICU first like you wanted but hopefully it's all part of the plan so that you get it at the right time for you <3 let me know how they go, of course. I hope they go super well.

the week has been a bit weird to be honest, in my team I had a semi argument that was properly tense for the first time with someone and it was just so unpleasant. you know those people where they aren't horrible but you know that you'll never completely see eye to eye with them? i think it's just one of those things, where we'll never just completely read each other or get each other? and it's not, like, a massive issue or anything that we can't deal with, but I feel like usually I get on really well with people or not at all (all or nothing person I guess haha) but with this person I've just got to admit that we're always going to be a bit in the middle? like, we talked it over, and I've still found sometimes we misunderstand one another? so things are still good in work and clients, but with workpeople it has been the more difficult battle? hopefully we should get some more cool media stuff with the K-pop people soon, so that's an up?

OMGsh your coworkers are so much older than you! [lease do post a picture of your room, I am 100% confident that you have made it so dreamy and pretty. Thank you sm for telling me more about these operations though! I feel like everywhere is on red alert at the moment when it comes to health and care and making sure that people look after themselves and not put others at risk, you know? the doctors that to talk to me about my potential surgeries too have said the same but it's nice hearing it from a friend, you know? so thank youuuu <3 <3

I was the same as you, I would get so so so anxious and stressed if I wasn't studying or working or anything like that? but my mum is like your mum and grandma, where she gets up early too! but I feel like I need to do the late night thing instead? but then once I got into this crazy spiral where I would wake up really early and go to bed really late and like nap in between so I ended up like having two hours of sleep either side? that was peak wth at the time haha XD so now I try and let myself wake up a bit later really XD ha ha I'm in barely adulting! like I work so much but I don't earn a lot ha ha – I don't think that's very effective adulting? or like, I don't know I guess for a lot of people my age there's a work hard and hope it pays off thing in certain industries? so you're definitely more effectively adulting than me right now! like, you're going to do stuff that's gonna actively help people and you'll see that right in front of you, you know!!? sometimes my work gets out there but I rarely see directly if it gets to make peoples lives better you know? so the path you're on is so so admirable <3 <3 <3

I get you though, do you find that you thrive under the pressure even though it's sometimes a lot? I find that sometimes it does help me, but sometimes I forget to identify the times when it isn't helping me? or, sometimes I take it too far? so please look out for yourself and take care of yourself <3 and when you're worried if you're on the edge know that it's enough for you to take a rest and not be super perfect. i sometimes tell myself to except that I'm probably gonna make two or three stupid mistakes a day? It sounds kind of silly but it means that it makes it easier for me to accept when I mess up, idk, I think it helps me balance the pressure sometimes? i 100% understand what you're saying - at school do they have people that can directly help? or like peer supporters so it's not as stressful or official feeling as a therapist? if you ever want me to come off anon to help lemme know <3 i'm always here for you <3

oh my gosh your grandparents have been able to live long too! all my grandparents lived close to 100 before passing, and one of my grandmothers had the same as your grandfather. he sounds so sweet and so kind though! i love that he knows how to FaceTime you! Some of my aunts and uncles still don't properly haha. it sounds like he knows that he's super loved though, he's very lucky <3 <3 i've been thinking about all this really lovely stuff and how it grounds you when stuff like careers can stress you out and feel like the most important thing when it shouldn't be? what are the personality differences between the different areas of the US? my East Coast friends seem to straight talk a lot more than my West Coast friends? like they're a lot more realistic as opposed to being, I don't know laid-back or if not laid-back sometimes just more comfortable with superficial stuff? Not like my West Coast friends are superficial people, but I think they accept it as part of the world a bit better? my friends on the east coast will rail against that stuff a lot more, like they buy into the influencer bullshit less? but I guess these are all sweeping generalisations anyway... I might have to travel a bit in europe soon... I got asked to go to otaly for some work today, and to holland next month. Idk if it will end up happening though, things change all the time? I have to keep checking quarantine rules all the time with countries! but YAY and YES Europe tour trip one day :D !!!!!!!

you know what? when I first saw you compare bowling and golf I was like, wait, what? but now I totally get it! i know a golfer and they talk about how physical and strenuous it is on the arms and stuff all the time which I don't think always comes across when you watch it and it makes a lot of sense with how you describe how you trained for bowling! i used to cox in rowing and I always used to find it really funny that I said that was the sport I did because honestly I just sat in the boat all the time and steered XD

obligatory YES WTF ARE COTTON SCENTS! quite a few shops in the city where I live have been closing down because of Covid but our Jo Malone is still going strong! I love that lots of already classic clothing shops have now gone out of business but for some reason the people where I live cannot live without their perfume XD I think I'm gonna go in later this week or next week to take a look! with all this travelling I kind of want to buy something new? also, my hands have been acting up with injury so I have to rest my hands more anyway – so might as well look for perfume right? do you have any recommendations or would the blueberry one you've just gotten be at the top of your list?

the exciting thing is that I'm doing a bit less this week! I need to wait and see if that job wants me to fly out to Italy within the next 48 hours, if not next week, but if not I think I'm gonna figure out how to rehabilitate my joints a bit and get my brain okay? It's been existential Covid crisis week haha - I think a lot of me and my friends have been feeling like we've lost so much of our lives and potential during this time and I've really tried to hold in and ignore it for the past 18 months? i'm not one to ever feel lonely or to really really want to be in a relationship like some of my friends, but I've just been feeling it this week? like, I love my independence, but I wouldn't say no to a boyfriend right now you know? I feel silly saying that sometimes because I'm so against feeling like you have to have someone in your life to be okay, but I guess that's just a result of how the world is has been recently?? but I think all my feelings exploded around this stuff now so, I am trying to get back into a better place? so it's not as exciting as some of the stuff I've told you about before, but it's what's up I guess?

how are your mum and grandmother doing? are they doing good? [lease send all my love to them too. I'm glad these help you reflect on your week! they do with me too and I'm always happy to hear from you, no matter how long you might need <3 <3 hope you manage to reward yourself for working so hard these past days and that you remember you're always doing 110% so you deserve the best!

love you lots and lots - 💥

ANGEL HELLO !!!!!!!!! i told myself i would stay on top of this and swear in a timely manner but ;_____; a full week + 2 clinical rotations later here i am on a sunday, it seems this is always the case :( maybe my get back to you day will only be on sundays LOL i will try my best in the future babe, but ofc thank you so much for being patient with me <3

uni is going fine so far hun !!!! i've started clinical rotations as i've said on thursday and friday, and then my first exam is on tuesday so i read some chapters yesterday so i'm not squished for time lol :) and ,,,, what you said "hope it's all part of the plan" is very much my way of thinking lol wha is your sign? i'm a sagittarius and that's like, a philosophy i go by like everything is how it's supposed to be even if it's not what u want like everything will work itself out :') i'm wondering if we are one in the same !!!!! <3

and omg ;_____; conflict within the workplace is NEVER easy bc all everyone wants is to reach the goal you all are reaching and bc there's some bumps in the road it makes everything that much more stressful :( and i know exactly the type of person you are talking about LOL i've had to work with some of my peers in the hospital who really didn't treat me all that nicely , but i still have to partner up with them anyways bc we had to move a patient lol ; like they never do anything terrible to you but you just cannot come to a proper agreement with them? i know the feeling :( but i can tell you are doing ur absolute best ;_____; it's a tough situation ,,,,,,,,, but may i propose something ??? maybe since things are high stress in the workplace, would u be willing to meet them outside the workplace, like a quick coffee meet up and then discuss those issues? maybe talking about it in the work environment is way too stressful for both of u and it is hard to come to an agreement, but maybe in a calmer, more informal setting do u think maybe the both of u could be like "hey, what u were talking about i'm not really head over heels for but this is what i think and do u think we can do something where both of us will be happy?" im thinking maybe will opening up a means for more civilized discussion?? just a thought LOL :') let me know how it goes :( i hope u are all able to figure everything out !!!!!

about the surgeries !!!!! like i said i know it's super stressful to think about bc this is one of the very few times in life where things are absolutely out of our control and that scares us, and we as medical providers aren't supposed to give u a false sense of security, but i promise u everything will be just fine as long as u correctly follow up with care post-op :) we wouldn't want an infection !!!! >;( i remember last year i had a patient and she was going in for a routine colonoscopy and she was scared shitless ,,,,,,, but i was like "listen ma'am i know it can seem scary but i was just in there with the doctors and everything is super relaxed and they know what they're doing in there, you'll be out in no time and i'll be here waiting !!" and that seemed to help her a lot, after the surgery she was on me like flies on shit LOL she was like "THANK U HONEY" (but i think most of it was bc she was still drugged up hhh)

LOL us with our family members waking up early <3 literally this morning i decided to do my laundry at 8am (its only 10 right right now lol) but idk it just make u feel a little bit better doesn't it? but oh my gosh no i don't see u in this way at all ;_____; babe like you're already THERE in the world working and to me like ,,,,,, being an effective functioning person in society is like all i ever want i just want to be COMPETENT and the fact that u manage ppl ???? it's already a lot of responsibility but you do it everyday like you go to work u make food for yourself u pay bills like yes this all kinda sucks but you're there doing it and idk ,,,,,,,, like u being in this position is like yeah their surviving in the world and doing okay !!!! so that’s how i see u hun ;_____;

and i don’t think i necessarily thrive under pressure but i just kinda ,,,,,,, handle it?? like i think i handle my stress quite well !!! i think the reason why making mistakes scares me so much in my field is bc if i make a mistake i can like, kill someone or seriously harm them if i do something wrong SLKDFJ but i have to remember i’m still just a student and a lot of the things that i’ll learn won’t even be in these last few months of nursing school, but rather during my months of orientation on the floor i’ll be working on when i finally land a job ,,,,,, i know i just have to be patient and kind to myself, but it’s hard not having these high expectations for myself bc everyone else pushes themselves super hard (nurses i mean) so i feel like i should be too , ya know? ;_____; it’s a hard balance that i’ve yet to find but hopefully once i graduate i’ll have just a little bit more confidence in myself :’)

and omg your grandparents lived a long life as well !!!!!!!! a lot of my friends’ grandparents are really young still, so it’s hard for others to relate i think LOL but :(((( i’m really lucky to have them around still and like, i feel like my grandparents are the cornerstone of our whole entire family; once they pass i’m not quite sure what will happen ;_____; so i’m just trying to cherish every moment that i have with them even tho sometimes it’s stressful lol ; also BOUT THE DIFFERENCES FROM EAST TO WEST COAST LOL ; i think u described it really well actually :) like among the friends u have the are from different parts of the states, it’s very accurate in my opinion !! and again after all it is just a very broad assumption, in general east coasters have this “workaholic” attitude, they tend to be very realistic which i actually appreciate a lot lol, i’m hoping to live near the east coast when i move out <3 now where i am from it is considered the midwest even tho it’s more east than west if u look at it on the map LMAO and like, it’s really funny bc if u say to someone you’re from the midwest they’ll tell u our reputation is being “too nice” LSKDLFJSKLD and like that’s our thing, a happy medium between coasts with big cities but small towns too and generally just very chill and nice ,,,,,,,, the south of the US is also known for having that “southern hospitality” overall very cheerful ppl with personality and super kind attitude on life :) now the west of the US i’m not saying there aren’t nice ppl out there bc there are LOL but esp near lost angeles or hollywood ofc you’re going to have ppl very stuck up bc ya know they made it to big bad LA and they want to be trendy with all of the fake health shit (celery juice does NOTHING FOR U sorry lol) generally my view of the west is just very fake and i would never want to have my family grow up there LMAO but that generally like, california and washington but like, utah or wyoming or colorado are just absolutely gorgeous and they have small town ppl there bc there are a lot of ranches there ,,,,,,,, does any of this make sense to u ??? KLASFJ 

i’m going to skip a few paragraphs bc this is so long already LMAO but trust me i’ve read everything so far lol ; it seems like you’re doing a lot of traveling !!!!!! <3 i’m so jealous !!!!!!!! italy sounds so beautiful i would love love to go some day :( ALSO U SMELLED THE BLUEBELL PERFUME RIGHT ???? U LIKED IT ?????? doesn’t it smell absolutely divine??? no matter how many scents i smelled after that i knew it was the right one for me ldkfsdlkfj <3 i’m still so in love with it ;____; also about ur lil rant about feeling lonesome :( bub i can really relate to this and i feel the same way like my mom and the rest of my family never pushed me to meet anyone and i’ve always never had a problem making friends, but like, as i’m older and i realize i’ll be alone a lot more of my time once i graduate like i really do want to share my life with someone :( i have a lot of love and i want to be able to show it to someone i care about a lot but i just never really take the initiative to do that bc quite honestly i’m not confident in myself lMAO so ,,,,,,, i know we never feel like we need to be dependent on someone but sharing experiences with someone who feels very strongly for u seems nice, doesn’t it? i wish this for both of us really soon okay?? <3 i tell my friends i would LOVE to be engaged right now lskdjfslfjs :’)

but anyways !!!!!!!! my mom and the rest of my family is doing well <3 and i’m doing okay too !!!!!! i don’t want to bore u with how clinicals are going but if u want me to tell u just let me know LOL and angel i know i say it all the time but always thank u so much for being patient with me okay? u are the absolute best !!!!!! also as promised, here are a few pics of my dorm room LOL it’s a shoebox but it’s my shoebox :) enjoy !!!!!!