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#im sorry but i wont shut up abt them bc they will finally be here on our screens with their voices and movements and scenes and ourgdjfjksk
baeshijima · 8 months
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they are everything to me e e ee ee e e
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pepprs · 1 year
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misery despair suffering etc etc
#purrs#delete later#two thoughts about separate things both causing the despair. thought / thing number 1 which i think ive talked abt on here many times before#but im saying it again: i am not good at being a friend in the ways my friends need me to be a friend. and in the ways friendship is thought#of societally i guess. i isolate myself constantly. i pull away from the opportunity to get closer with people i don’t know as well. i don’t#text back and then when im finally ready it’s been so egregiously long since it was appropriate for me to respond or reciprocate or#whatever it is i am so crushed by guilt and shame and embarrassment that i can’t bring myself to do it. i have so many unread messages and i#wont even let myself open them. and ive been like this for years. and i hurt someone very badly many years ago by being that way. and it was#more complicated than that but sometimes i remember it and how i acted and how i treated them. and i wonder sometimes if they check up on me#and i don’t want to be immature or weird or whatever for talking about it or wondering that openly. but if you do read this and you know who#you are: i am so sorry. i meant whst i said that i would never stop wishing you well and hoping the very best for you. and i hope you have#all of that and more. and im so sorry for not being brave enough to communicate with you or stick around. i really really am. and im sorry#to all the other people i have hurt by pulling away and shutting down and shrinking inside myself and not talking. ik it’s weird to post#that instead of just telling people directly but it’s the guilt. i am fully aware of how many people / groups of people i owe things to /#for but also just… miss. a lot. and want to talk to even though i won’t let myself. i don’t know why im like this and i don’t know how to#stop. but im sorry im not a good friend or even acquaintance or community member. and im talking to everyone now i guess including anyone#reading this bc god knows how many asks and messages i have on here. im sorry. i want to be a better friend. but i also never have spoons. a#and i also want to stay spoonless and cocooned on myself forever and never come out. and i hate that. i want to be a friend. i want to be#kind and giving and loving and generous in the ways you all have been with me. i want to hang out with people and send messages and be there#to lift people up and celebrate with them. but all i can muster is tapping like on social media and it’s horrific. i have gifts to make and#hello / checking in messages to reply to and roleplay starters to post and i just can’t do it right now and im scared i’ll never be able to#again. but it’s a self fulfilling prophecy. if i say i can’t do it then iwont. it’s not enougu to just be aware of it i have to act on it#and change it. but im exhausted and hurting right now and i have been for years and i need to heal first but what if this is healing.#idk. i rambled on that for much longer than i thought i would so nowim gonna say the second thing in a separate post. and it’ll be weird to#post about that in light of this and it’ll be weird to post this at all. but its been weighing on me so heavily today and i don’t want#anyone to think im ignoring them or not aware of being like this or whatever. and posting into the void is easier than telling individual#people to your faces even though i know it’s cowardly. im really truly sorry. i will try to get better once i have the strength to try.#actually yeah no not gonna say the second thing yet. it would be weird to say it now. this needs to sit a little first
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haojun · 10 months
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Gonna be me next week at derby practice when my new skates come in
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relaxxattack · 3 years
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(i dont care to do c! tags bc theres. so many characters. if i dont say cc! then im talking abt the characters) normally i am not one to think much about the syndicate bc outside of ranboo being there to protect tubbo the syndicate Frustrates me a bit but. if phil starts to realize just how fucked over tubbo got by schlatt being erased from the narrative (and especially how shittily techno has treated tubbo) then i really hope they lean into like. the fact that the syndicate may soon turn into phil, niki, ranboo, and possibly the mystery member (im including mystery member mostly because i think tubbo is on good terms with almost everyone except like. dream, possibly wilbur but we'll see, and like the eggpire ppl but none of them are likely options but it is possible that the mystery member could just be neutral) all like. wanting tubbo to be safe and phil is *just* reasonable enough that i think he'd realize how unfair it is for tubbo to have been subjected to so much shit just for techno to introduce even more fear and the need to hide in his life
like phil already keeps the bee duo marriage and michael a secret, he lets tubbo come over and while of course its mostly from the semi lore vibes phil seems vaguely fond of tubbo already (i dont think phil and tubbo have father/son vibes tho, more just like. tubbo is just That Kid that adults cant help but adore even though the kid will rob them of house and home. slightly amused elder watching a tiny fucking gremlin make sex jokes and talk about soviet russia), niki from what i remember still cares about tubbo (probably because she cant redirect any anger towards him without realizing how unjustified it would be kcnsks she can come up with excuses for hating tommy but tubbo didnt do anything that niki has a problem with outside of her maybe having a bad view on butcher army if she knows about it?), ranboo is. ranboo. i dont need to clarify. and then like said theres a very low possibility of the fifth member *disliking* tubbo or being unable to sympathize with him.
people talk a lot about how techno needs to lose in a way that he cant easily come back from without introspection and i think while the rest of the syndicate standing up for tubbo would increase technos grudge against tubbo initially its also like. something that i think would maybe force techno to see tubbo as a person because now theres nothing techno can box (haha gettit. tubbox tubbo in a box tubbo getting boxed into certain roles by people who refuse to let him out techno esp doin this teehoo) tubbo into that wouldnt just. acknowledge that tubbo is a person. hes not apart of the government anymore, not planning any failed revolution, the most negative title to his name is being one of the nuke makers but even then thats out of fear and safety and techno knows that. otherwise tubbos current crimes are nothing thats special to tubbo (like. stealing and searching for evidence in ppls homes and stuff, the latter of which techno doesnr even know about). right now tubbos a husband, a father, a friend, a kid, *ex*-government, a person. and just.
i think that with how much foreshadowing about tubbos execution no longer being a secret amongst the witnesses and tubbo himself and soon being something that people close to techno like phil and ranboo know about as well (in that i want phil to learn that techno did it and for ranboo to learn about it in general bc hes just biased enough for tubbo and just smart enough that i think even if somehow he wasnt told who did it he could figure it out), and with the fact that tubbos lore has been confirmed to now be something thats actively going to be played into? i think (or at least hope) that it might spur phil and techno into finally seeing tubbos side of the story (and probably also get into the possibility of tubbo opening up to tommy and ranboo but i do think realistically either tubbo will try to play it off/not truly open up about how much its effected him or tubbo will at first shut down or go into complete repression mode, especially if phil and ranboo get the story from other people rather than tubbo himself [but god do i hope they confront tubbo himself]. either those two or tubbo talks about his emotions through fucking snapping at something/someone like he did at quackity when reminded of his execution, which as long as its Not tommy or ranboo ill absolutely be cheering on him for)
which is all a very convoluted way of saying uhh. *grabby paws at the ccs currently involved in the arc of clearing up personal misconceptions about l'manberg (and especially tubbos involvement and how easily those around him judged him based off of their versions of the story)* tubbo lore? tubbo healing tubbo talking about his problems? characters learning to see him as a person and recognizing how traumatized he is and that hes not uneffected but actively repressing any effects? please? (also ending note as the cherry on top of this essay that im sorry for dropping into your inbox: im kind of glad that tommys healing arc and tubbos possible healing arc are going to happen at similar times but are still separate. something something its nice to see acknowledgement that tommy and tubbo wont heal in the same way and arent going to know how to help each other but theyre still going through it together. their arcs are intertwining without removing their individuality and as someone w major co-dependency issues its kind of nice idk. you can be there for someone and still acknowledge that you have your own things to go through too and that while you wont be alone you shouldnt force those around you to support you. the bench trio are all helping each other out of free will and genuine love for each other while still realizing they have some problems they arent ready to talk about yet that arent forced to the open because theyre all doing their best to handle each other with care and i just. bench trio my beloveds. the kids are alright.) -🎭🎪 (also as the actual end note if theres ever a need to refer to me as something other than the emojis mask or eyez works fine but the idea of my name being the emojis is also Very Funny to me so do what you will)
im working on my aperture camera college assignment rn and my brain is sort of fried so i dont have an intelligent answer, but i got the happy chemical reading this.
yeah. i think we all know here that my favorite character is tubbo, and i REALLY hope we get him addressing anything that’s happened to him in canon. pretty much all of what you said sounds very good. *grabby hands* spare tubbo lore? please? spare tubbo lore?
perhaps during the three weeks wilburs off in the fucking woods (/lh) we could have a the-others-find-out-what-happened-to-tubbo-(and in DETAIL)-arc. pleaseeeeeeeee and ty
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nodelinquent · 4 years
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an obnoxiously long liveblog where i react to the swedish dub of the steven universe movie (warning: i actually like dubs and wont constantly complain, sorry).
"come live with us in the palace, you can stay here FOREVER" jesus christ lmao
steven's voice finally fits lmao
wait it's sadie THRILLER in swedish????
some of these rhymes are impressive but hus and ljus? not great gang fdsjkhf
wow ok the lyrics for steven's part in here we are in the future is uuuh not great??? like they threw words in at random
FUCKING.... PäRLAN..... hate that still
they didnt translate homeworld..... im crying why is the dub LIKE THIS....
BUT KINDERGARDEN SHOULD BE TRANSLATED I SEE HOW IT IS LMAO
i do wanna show this movie to my nephew, he really liked watching the su clips i showed him back in the day.... i think it's the bright colors and singing honestly lmao
OK SHUT UP EVERYONE SPINEL IS COMING!!!!!!!!!
OH.... idk if i recognize this voice actress?? she sounds so cute
amethyst just said "pucko" and i feel blessed lmao
who IS this girl??? i like her but WHO IS SHE
lets hear her sing ahhhhhh
"ive listened plenty of times to steven's refrain, oh how fun it is to finally meet pink's gang" I LOVE THAT.....
the song is a lil meaner to steven specifically i kinda love it lmao
the actress does a good job kinda copying spinel's voice and laugh without overdoing it, i think? it's nice i like her!!
they missed the opportunity to almost have greg say "shit" and i will never forget, never forgive.
god the way they translated some of these lyrics makes it even MORE confusing to understand what's happening lmao
i recognize ruby and sapphire's voice actresses, veterans
theres actually a lot of talented veterans in swedish su, even if ppl complain all the time abt them lmao
like man steven's voice actor is finally allowed to emote now that he doesnt have to sound like a baby all the time
idk how i feel abt bismuth... i dont think ive heard her before so it might just be like, shock fhshjdshfds
bismuth's voice is very interesting??? she seems to have a lisp or smth? man i kinda like it?? too bad she has to sing THE WORST SONG IN THE MOVIE..........
"krullhåriga" is accurate yes but god they should have used "lockhåriga"....
"isn't it love" in swedish is very good, i have no complaints
i wonder how much of the cast is woc
one of my favorite songs is coming up ahhhhhhh
oh it's cuute.... the "no matter what"-end part could have been stronger but it's good!!
"what are you doing here now huh what?" like those old anime dubs...
they used "backa undan" but "håll dig undan" would have sounded more natural imo
"i'm back you nut" again, im blessed
half of the time i cant tell if the written lines are bad or if it's the actors dinking them up and no one bothering to fix it
YEAH IT'S SADIE THRILLER????? im crying that makes no sense lmao
man am i excited to hear steg
"disobedient" is also okay fjsdhfds
i wonder if these are on swedish spotify fdshkfsd (theyre not and never will be)
OOOOOOH I LOVE HIM!!!!!!!!!!!! good voice
"independent together" is VERY GOOOOD AHHHHH they're using a word thats more like "unbound/unfettered together" and thats very sexy lmao
OPAL??? her voice is omg??? not prepared. it's good tho lmao
they dont use happily ever after, instead they say "promising future" and idk how i feel abt that
we're getting to HERE IN THE GARDEN
theyre so hit and miss with the lyrics in swedish dub su so im very scared
HOMEWORLD im still not over that lmao WHY DID THEY NOT TRANSLATE IT?!?!?
here in OUR garden????
"och sen så log hon, till min förtjusning, ögonen blänkte, det var sån berusning" ("and then she smilled, to my delight, eyes shining, it was such an intoxication")  is actually SUCH a good translation ahhhhh
i quite like "gled iväg" for "drift away" too... it's the word we use for things like "slip out of my hands (gled mig ur händerna)". like she just WATCHED pink slip out of her hands.... ahhh
"she doesn't exist anymore, only the son is left, what am i waiting for now?" MAKES ME VERY SAD LMAO
"i feel so RAW" DANG....
overall "drift away" was also good, nice job ya dinguses
i wish there were subtitles bc it took me several listens to realize spinel was very quickly shouting "JUST POUR SALT IN MY WOUNDS WHY DONTCHA"
"Found" is interesting bc they make it sound like Spinel needs romantic love and not like, general love fdjskhfdsk also instead of found it's "needed" which is hm.... i mean.... a lil messed up fdskjf
i rly like connie's voice, idk if ive said that yet
spinel's voice actor cant quite be as unhinged as og spinel, but she's trying and she's good!! we stan!!!
"true kinda love" is also good, they say "cause i believe in love" which is cute... excited to hear steven's lil bit in it
wow... steven's bit was bad, very disappointing.
steven's voice actor is so good wtf??
why did they use "förgöra" (destroy) instead of kill??? the cowards at swedish CN can fight me
theres no good translation for "change" in swedish, which is very unfortunate for this bit of the movie kfdskdsfhds
steven's swedish voice actor obviously does not hold a candle to zach callison BUT it's extra bad when he sings lmao
ok i REALLY love the lyrics they did for "change" like good job gang i wanna learn this version and sing it all the time
"let us adore you reprise" is also good, now it makes sense why they used love like that in "found", so it'd match up with this
ok steven's voice actor could pull off the high notes for "happily ever after reprise" but he missed it so many other times bfdkshfhdskds DO RE-TAKES PLEASE SWEDISH CN I BEG???
overall this dub was good, i think?? at least they didnt censor any queers this time fdshjdsfjkfjds
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