#im super tired so i wanna stay home but my friend is in town today so i wanna go hang out but im tired.

[zhuhongs]

having a #girl moment 😔😔😔

[jeonchan26]

Used To Be (Part 10)

Warnings; Angst, A Little Bit Of Fluff(Maybe) Self-Esteem & swearing. Mental Abuse, Toxic Relationship, Don’t Read If It Might Trigger You.

This Is All Made Up, I Don’t Believe The Boys Would Do Any Of This. Our Boys Are Angels❤️

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“Hello, Mrs. Bang. How are you today?” the receptionist asked you as you signed in. You hated the fact that you had to change your last name. You cringed at the thought of it but smile anyways. 

“I told you to call me (y/n), but Im good. I’m excited to see my son!” You said feeling Chan’s eyes on you. 

You took as seat, and just looked around at all the couple smiling at each other. You envy them, you wish you could have what they did, the love of their partners. Instead you were stuck with someone that hated you with everything part of their body. You sigh deeply and heard Chan clear his throat,

“Why did you tell her to call you by your first name and not your married name?” He asked looking at you. 

“Umm I’m not used to the last name yet and I rather just be called by my name” you told him quietly.

“Ha, don’t you think this act of you playing innocent is getting annoying? You act like if I can’t see right through you” Chan told you with venom in his voice. 

You were about to answer him back but heard you name being call to the back, you got up without a second glance and smile at the nurse that took you to the ultrasound room.

You saw your baby and heard his heartbeat, every time it brought you tears to your eyes and just looking at him you finally made up your mind. You needed to leave and hide until it was safe. Your son cannot grow up with a father like Chan. 

Chan got an important call from his job so he had to step out for a moment, just in time for Jimin to come in with a smile on his face. 

“Ah (y/n), how are you feeling?” Jimin asked you. 

“I’m doing good. Just getting used to him moving around a lot more” You told him.

“I can see your due date is getting closer, how are you feeling about that?” 

“Not going to lie I’m nervous but excited. I’m ready to meet baby groot” You told him putting a hand on your tummy. 

“There’s nothing to be nervous about, all of it will be forgotten once you deliver him.” Jimin say.

“Jimin, would it be safe to travel? Since my due date is so close?” You whispered to Jimin scared that Chan might hear you.

“Wait, you wanna travel? Why?” Jimin had his suspicion since he first saw you with Chan he knew something was going on but didn’t want to comment on it.

“I need to leave Jimin. I still want you to deliver my baby but I don’t think I can stay with Chan anymore.” You said to him wiping your tears.

“Look I wouldn’t recommend you to travel with your due date being so close but I can’t stop you.” Jimin wrote his number down on a paper and handed it to you. “Call me if you need anything. I will deliver your baby as planned. No matter where you are at. I’ll go okay!”

Chan came in right before Jimin was telling you the finishing his talk, you got up and left Chan following your footsteps. “What did he tell you?” Chan asked you. 

“He said the baby is fine and that my appointments are going to be once a week since we are getting closer to the due date” You said waiting for the nurse to schedule your new appointment.

At home.

You secretly packed a bag in your closet with all your necessities, tonight was going to be the night you ran away from this miserable life with Chan. 

Chan came into your room without knocking, “My friends are coming tonight. Stay in your room you know the drill” He told you leaving you with no room to interfere. 

This was perfect, Chan and his friends usually went down to the basement to talk “business” and would stay there for hours. You could leave as soon as the sun went down. 

After what felt like hours you heard the doorbell ring and voices could be heard but they started to disappear as they walked doing the stairs to the basement. When the maid came in to your room you pulled her in and quickly closed the door.

“Where is Chan and his friends?”

“They are down in the basement?” The maid gave you a questionable look.

“Okay thank you! You may leave” you quickly dismissed her and walk towards your closet preparing your stuff. It was now or never.

You quietly walked to the front door & opened it. You could feel the cold freeze on your face and you loved it. The taxi you called was waiting for you at the corner of the street, you quickly made your way there and got in.

You finally let out the breath you were holding on since you got out of your room. You were finally free, away from Chan and his torment.

“We are going to be save baby. I promise you that nothing will harm you.” You smiles smiling at your baby bump as the taxi drove through the city. You arrived at his house and knock on his door.

You prayed he would let you stay until you could leave without having Chan following you.

“(Y/n)? What are you doing here?” Jungkook asked you as soon as he opened the door. Looking at you confused, he saw you packed bags. “Is everything okay? Where are you going?”

“Jungkook, I’m sorry to come so late at night but I need your help” you said looking at him with hope.

“Umm yea, come in. It’s cold outside.” He quickly rush you in taking your bags from you putting them by the door as he closed it. Jungkook looking at you he saw you looked different besides being heavily pregnant you looked tired and sad.

“Is everything okay?” He asked you as he walked you towards the living room going into the kitchen getting you water. He sat next to you waiting patiently for you to say something. He never pictured you being at his house so late at night.

“I’m sorry for coming so late jungkook. I just needed to get out of the house. I can’t take it anymore. I know you don’t care or believe anything I tell you. But I still want to be honest with you jungkook” you told him looking at him with tears in your eyes.

“What is going on? Tell me!” Jungkook was getting worried. He started to think that maybe you didn’t lie to him in the first place but his anger got the better of him at the time.

That night you opened up to Jungkook telling him everything from Chan threat, to his rules and everything Chan has been doing to you since you got married to him. Jungkook was angry at Chan and himself for being so stupid to believe Chan’s words in the first place. You were his best friend and he didn’t believe you.

“You Can stay here for as long as you want” Jungkook said after all his emotions were under control.

“That’s the thing Jungkook. I can’t, he will find me and bring me back. I need to leave this place.” You told him.

“I actually have two cousins that live in the next town. Maybe you can move in with them for the time until you have your son. They are super nice and umm they know about you” he told you while scratching the back of his head, nervously.

“How do they know about me?” You looked at him with confusion.

“Umm I told them about you.” He said looking down at his lap.

“Oh” was all you could say. “Are you sure they would be okay with you” you asked him.

“Oh yes they would. They are super nice people. We can go there tomorrow. I’ll let them know what is going on. Don’t worry they won’t say anything.” Jungkook told you as he walked you towards the spare room. “For now just rest okay. We will leave tomorrow early in the morning”

“Thank you Jungkook! I missed you!” You said pulling you in for a hug.

“I missed you too. And I’m sorry I didn’t believe you. I don’t know why I didn’t but I promise I’ll make it up to you and my nephew.” He told you giving you a kiss on the head.

You both said goodnight and parted ways. Tomorrow you will be in a new city starting a new life.

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Im sorry for the late post. I’ve been busy but since I work at a school and my job is a closed for the next 3 weeks. I should be able to upload more🦋 I’ll try my best to post more.

[aacetrainer]

In a very rambly mood and bored at work so I guess I'm gonna talk about my life (positive, reflective) in a read more?? Idk friends/mutuals/curious passer bys if you wanna see what my lifes been like recently

May has been a WILD month y'all. I moved into an apartment, got my 2nd vaccination, survived mothers day, and I went from temp work to be hired full time and salaried :00

The apartment has been so nice!! Ive been very tired of having no control over my living space so that's been very lovely. Its def still a mess but we are slowly moving in; working on getting hanger to hang clothes up and stuff like that 😂

I didnt expect it but we are also fairly furnished at this point?? Between my parents and my boyfriends family donating stuff they had, them buying a few things as house warming presents, and us buying a few essential items -- we've got a fully furnished kitchen; both have desks; a living room set up is on the way (TV stand, TV, couch); comfy ass bed; and a dresser to pick up when we have time. So like ? Its awesome. Just need to finish cleaning

It actually may be put together when my sibling comes to town! They are moving back to CA/home after spending college + 2 years out in Boston so its going to be the first time in like ? A decade that most of my siblings and i are living on the west coast. With them coming out tomorrow (holy shit its tomorrow!) That means weve got 3/4 in CA

Work itself isnt very exciting but coming on full time is for sure. Nearly doubled my salary 🙏 which is badass ngl. Excited to be the sugar mama/aunty ive always wanted to be 😅

The work itself is fine - if anything i wish they gave me more because I hate having nothing to do 🙃 ik others would kill to play phone games all day but after the 2nd week of 8 hour days of phone games you start to miss busy work lol!

I also think its playing into my energy? Ive just been super exhausted lately. I think its partially because im doing nothing at work? Counter intuitive but sometimes my depressed ass is less depressed and exhausted when I DO stuff. So i think its work (or the lack there of) feeding into depression which the messy ass state of the apartment also feeds into and the feeling of never ending organization/cleaning all has left me very tired ;-;

All in all been an upward trajectory recently I think! Biggest complaint being i wish i had more energy to stay up later and visit w/my boo :( and i wish i had more work just to keep me busy/the day going by quicker. Otherwise I kinda cant believe how good its going?

Idk if you read this you clearly care enough about me/were curious enough to read this and i hope you know ily! A lot of y'all on this hellsite have seen me break down so its nice that for once im coming on here to ramble about things that arent catastrophic and horrible. A lot of yall have been there to support me and are def part of why im still kicking it today so thanks for caring about me! Whether it was enough to be my friend/mutual or if it was just enough to read my post :)

Y'all are fabulous! Much love