#internalised misogy . and it was Loud. and i’ve unpacked that (and still have more to go ofc!) but u am way more comfortable in myself now
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feeling v . hmm. interesting
#not bad actually ! just. interesting#my roommate cut my hair into a mullet/wolf/shag cut Moment and i luv it#but i’m hearing a oversized hoodie and gaa shorts and feeling lowkey gender? in a way that i have never felt?#like i’ve looked at ppl and felt Gender and seen that but i’ve never felt it like this when looking at myself?#and it’s a little. hmm . huh . bc i was very Like That when i was younger. 13 - 15 and didn’t want to be a Girly Girl bc.#internalised misogy . and it was Loud. and i’ve unpacked that (and still have more to go ofc!) but u am way more comfortable in myself now#and i luv makeup ! and dresses ! and traditionally v feminine things ! and i don’t give a fuck if ppl see me like that or if that’s their#first thought when they think of me ! it doesn’t bother me if they don’t think of me sparring or playing gaelic or any Tough Lad Stuff#and i’m not questioning my gender (rn anyway. who knows what the future holds) but i’m kinda vibing in this Gender feeling if that makes#sense? lol mb it doesn’t. mb i am wayyy too in my head and hyped up on no sleep but it is what i am feeling ! so i am going to enjoy it !#thank u for coming to my ted talk#will delete later#probably#if not ->#diary posting
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