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angeltriestoblog · 7 years

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Your Comprehensive Guide to Surviving Grade 11

WARNING: The longest post I’ve ever made in the history of my blogging “career” is up ahead. Nevertheless, please read it so my efforts won’t be wasted.

In a nutshell, last school year was me trying to secure the Guinness World Record for the number of breakdowns on a bedroom floor. The amount of workload was unforgiving, the pressure to perform was crippling, the competition was inadvertently fierce and the standards set were higher than fun.'s friends in the Empire State. (Please get this reference.) Surprisingly, I survived and lived not only to tell the tale but to also help incoming Grade 11 students prepare for the year that is to come so they won't have to deal with the many risks of premature stress like I did! This is where this guide (with some unnecessary blabber on the side because will it really be an Angel Martinez post without it) comes in. Though it's a given that not everything that happened to me won't apply to you, I still hope you use these to better your experiences and emerge as a stronger and more productive person! Like me, I guess. In a way.

To kick this off, let me just say that I know this notice might be coming in a little late, since enrollment for most schools (in the metro, at least) have already come to a close. Thus, by the time you've read this, you may have already chosen a strand of your own! The selection of some schools may be limited to the basics: Science, Technology, Engineering and Math (STEM), Accountancy, Business and Management (ABM) and Humanities and Social Sciences (HUMSS) which are all pretty self-explanatory in terms of the topics of focus. But from what I know, others also offer Arts and Design and Sports for those who wish to devote their full attention to the talents they wish to hone and even a general academic strand for the benefit of those who remain undecided. I, for one, chose ABM: I didn’t feel like committing to a certain career yet and wanted to opt for the safest option among the choices.

The process of choosing which way to go is pretty intimidating at first especially once you figure out that the rest of your life may very well be at stake. But, it isn't that much of a pain once you reflect on your interests enough and see if those align with what you want to do and where you want to be in the future, if that’s not too forward looking for you! I know a couple of people who’ve had to compromise their true passions for the sake of pleasing their families. Whether it’s to continue a legacy that’s been passed down for several generations or fulfill a dream that belonged to someone else, some parents believe they have every reason in the world to demand their children’s future, even if it’s obviously against their will. Yes, I believe that it’s their responsibility to guide their kids through the process of figuring out what they want to be in such a fast-paced and ever-changing world where anyone can influence and be influenced for better or for worse. They must be able to provide the insight that only they possess after all the years they’ve spent collecting wisdom. They should help us plan out what’s gonna be on the blueprint of our lives, not finish it by themselves, present it and expect us to follow without any questions.

But as per usual, I digress. TL:DR choose the track you want, you don’t owe anything to anyone.

Generally, Grade 11 will be the hardest year on you. It doesn’t care if you came terribly unprepared, if you haven’t slept a wink in eons or if the people you live with barely even know who you are anymore. It’s unforgiving and relentless in the pursuit of giving you the biggest ordeal of your life. Based on my personal experience, I reckon it’s due to the fact that our teachers stand by their decision to treat us as young adults, seeing as we’d be in first year college anyway if the K-to-12 program wasn’t a thing. When we were children, everything we needed to know about a certain topic would be put on a silver platter and handed over to us, usually in the form of photocopied sheets of old handouts. All we’d have to do is memorize whatever was on them and eventually ace the tests that usually came in multiple choice or matching type form.

But now, we’re in charge of making our own notes, deciphering cryptic explanations for a certain lesson and most of all, making our own creative output based on what we could be often inaccurate interpretations. Grade 11 gave big importance to the performance task, much to the dismay of everybody. Whether individual or by group, it was always half our grade and due way before any of us were ready to face the task at hand. It also required coming up with original ideas, or solutions to the most common problems and it’s either bland when working alone or chaotic when with classmates, because everyone wants to be heard when we’re actually fighting for metaphorical spots.

I didn’t feel it much during the first semester though, because I had the best schedule on campus. Classes ended at 2:30PM for me so I had plenty of time at my disposal. I could hang out with friends, have a chat with my mom and procrastinate (responsibly) before proceeding with my work and still be able to go to sleep before the clock struck ten. My subjects weren’t terrible as well. Yeah, not all of them were anchored in the very foundation of my track but I was able to get grades far better than I would have expected, so it’s all good. Here’s a briefer on each:

General Math

A solid 8/10, which is a big deal considering the fact that Math has never been my strong suit. First quarter covers topics I barely understood when they were discussed to me in Grades 9 and 10, namely functions (linear, quadratic, polynomial, The Problematic Trio aka rational, exponential and piecewise) and equalities and inequalities. Second quarter focuses on business math, weirdly enough when there’s an entirely different subject for that, but the lessons don’t overlap. Annuities, stocks and bonds, and loans were explained plus a little bit of logic towards the end.

The key to Math is a heck lot of practice. Practice, practice, practice. Even when you know the answers, or more preferably when there’s no key given. Answer every problem in the book on a separate sheet of paper, make up your own, explain the procedure of solving to yourself, help a friend out and refresh your memory simultaneously. Do it when you get home, or when you have a free period at school or you have no idea what else to do seeing as that’s the only way you’ll develop the skills needed to become a human calculator.

Business Math

A more practical Math subject: every single topic discussed was something that could be applied in real life and useful to us when we have careers. The first few weeks consisted of our reviewing our favorites: fractions, decimal and percentage, and ratio and proportion, so it evidently started on a good note. It later on proceeds to buying and selling, computation for salaries and wages then the presentation and analysis of business data in table and graph form.

Though the lessons here are undeniably easier than our previous Math subject, it still wouldn’t hurt to practice, especially if everything isn’t clear to you from the get go. If your teacher is anything like mine and thrives on class participation, recite as often as you can whether it’s to give a recap of yesterday’s lesson or show the solution on the board. Her personal favorites in our class were those who made it a point to raise their hands as often as possible.

Physical Science

A mix of the deadliest sciences mixed in one subject. Physics and chemistry, folks. Just as appealing as it sounds. If you like both of them, you’ll breeze past this, no sweat. But if you’re like me and you stopped paying attention in science class after the teacher was done discussing the body system, you’ll have a lot of catching up to do. Subject matter included motion, energy, chemical reactions, force and energy. Don’t be too excited that there are only five, because these took two semesters to properly shove in our craniums.

There’s no downtime in this subject, you have to hustle every single day or else you’ll fall behind while the work just keeps piling up. Read up on everything and do not leave out even a single detail: know which causes what, and why well enough to the point that you can recite it in your sleep. Memorize the formulas and most importantly, invest in a double liner calculator! It’s a bit pricey but spending the amount required is far better than having to enter multiple parentheses to work your way around an equation.

Earth and Life Science

Personally the superior science for me, considering that the topics were genuinely interesting and made me gain a better understanding of how the world works. We studied the origin and structure of the earth and beyond, earth processes, natural hazards, bioenergetics, perpetuation of life, evolution, organ systems and interaction and interdependence.

The only downside for some is that many terms will be introduced throughout the course of this subject, and you’ll obviously be required to memorize them all and at the very least, identify their definitions. Making flash cards for each lesson would definitely come in handy, even if takes a while and could very well cramp your hand but there’s this app called Quizlet which basically serves the same purpose and is easily accessible in any device you download it on.

Oral Communication

I think I was the only one in class who actually enjoyed what was going on for the most part of Oral Com, since I enjoy talking to a crowd and writing. If the mere mention of that phrase alone gives you shivers down to your spine, I guess you’ll have a lot of mental and emotional preparation to do. Normally, this subject would heavily rely on application of learnings through exercises and presentations but there was still a bit of (unnecessary) discussion here and there on topics like public communication skills and communicative strategies.

Expect a lot of speaking in front of the classroom! Tasks will range from impromptu (no time to think beforehand), extemporaneous (short preparation time upon receiving the question) and prepared speaking. Groupwork is also high in number: the teacher will give you a situation (e.g. you’ll be selling a product, your house is on fire and you need to call the fire department, ya know… the usual [?]) and you’ll need to propose your solution in the most eloquent and spontaneous way possible. Which means no reading aloud of lines scribbled on your hand with a G-Tec.

Organization and Management

Basically an introduction to the world of business and thus an essential subject for my strand. Points discussed were the nature of management, the firm and its environment, environmental scanning (PEST and SWOT analysis) and the functions of a manager in detail (planning, organizing, staffing, leading and controlling).

This subject was very detail-heavy so as much as I was willing to learn, I couldn’t avoid being overwhelmed by the number of things we were trying to run through in around sixteen weeks. It also didn’t help that we didn’t have a book to refer to and had literal stacks of photocopied handouts to lug around instead. But I guess by now, your school has a textbook to provide you with and if not, there are some published by Rex Bookstore available in big branches of National Bookstore like in Quezon Avenue. The best thing to do to survive this subject is to read so you can understand all the concepts. Everything discussed is important and the quizzes and quarterly tests you’ll take will require not only what you think it means, but also how you’ll use it IRL

Understanding Culture, Society and Politics

Potentially one of your favorite subjects, if you’re given the right teacher, since it focuses on the intricacies of our lives as human beings. From the study of humans past and present and the complexity of our cultures (anthropology), we head on to the analysis of government systems and activity (political science) and the nitty-gritty of our development and functions in human society (sociology).

I didn’t have a problem with this step the lessons were comprehensible enough to grasp my attention but just make sure that you exert effort to understand everything! Because even though a chunk of the activities also include matching type, true or false or fill in the blanks, essays are a mainstay. Usually, they’re not based on facts too but on your own personal opinion and the teacher will be able to tell if you don’t have a particular stand or you do yet you fail to back it up with actual evidence, so be sure to find a basis for everything you say.

Unfortunately, all fun and games were over when the second semester rolled in. Our privileges were taken back and our schedule was reverted back to the usual 4:20PM. Thanks to the fact that my busmates never went straight to the bus upon dismissal and liked roaming around the campus, leaving our conductor to search for them like she was in some sort of treasure hunt, I went home at 6:00PM every day. To make matters worse, this just so happened to be the season when the research papers started rolling in, one by one, all poised and ready to kill us ever so slowly. Let me give you another quick recap:

Pagbasa at Pagsuri

Definitely not the kind of “Pagbasa” I was expecting, if I’m being frank. I thought we were going to be reading and analyzing contemporary Filipino literature, which excited me since my knowledge in that genre was close to non-existent. Turns out, we would be looking at different kinds of texts (informative, persuasive, analytical, etc) then finding out how to write them afterwards. There’s a chance you might not experience this unless we go to the same school, but our teacher invented the ADIDS method in order to help us learn this more effectively through application. I forgot what it stands for, but basically all you do is discuss each facet of a very broad topic thoroughly in the form of a well thought out class presentation.

Meanwhile, the research paper takes up one whole semester. Not to sound boastful, but I had thought that I would be able to do this with ease because all I ever do with my life is write I mean I practically came out of my mother’s womb with a pen and paper in hand and I speak more Filipino than English these days seeing as I spend a bigger portion of my day in school. But, the finished product is often bland and makes use of the same words over and over in a failed attempt to accurately describe what I want to put on paper. And as if that wasn’t bad enough, the topic also had to be narrowed down repeatedly to suit a particular audience, from a specific place within a specific time frame so we ended up doing a research on the effects of Jason Derulo’s songs on the opinions of Grade 11 students from our school in the academic year 2016-2017. Please don’t laugh at us.

You also don’t just write the entire paper, but also be briefed on its parts, their functions and determine what sets them apart from each other, and the specifications in making each of them. Which includes stuff as minuscule as the measurement of the margins, font sizes and types to use et cetera. It’s not that hard though because as you’re working on the paper, you familiarize yourself even more.

Komunikasyon at Pananaliksik

The easiest one I took the entire semester, and for obvious reasons, my favorite. Our teacher was brilliant in the sense that he was well-versed in the subject matter and got work done yet let us watch Train to Busan or Seklusyon on the TV if the schedule permitted. The topics weren’t mind-boggling either: we just covered the history of the Filipino language and communicative skills (which further cemented my belief that this was basically the counterpart of Oral Com). They may be confusing at first but the key is to notice sentence patterns! The number of activities given to us was reasonable and not particularly stress-inducing: just quizzes that were few and far-between, a groupwork and reaction paper for a performance task.

Fundamentals of Accounting

A lot of people are intimidated by the idea of studying Accounting, and I’m not surprised. It’s always described as something that relies on analysis and numbers, two things that we normally don’t excel in at school. But it’s actually nothing to fuss about as long as you do your reading, understand the basic guidelines, practice at home and have a qualified teacher who has the proper training and skill set. The first few chapters don’t even involve computation of any kind yet. You’ll just be acquainted with the very foundation of the subject: the branches of accounting, the users of accounting information, the forms of business organizations and types of businesses. Maybe the most important lessons that you could pick up are the accounting equation (assets = liabilities + equity), types of major accounts and the generally accepted principles because they serve as the rules to follow for making your accounting-related decisions.

Eventually, you’ll make it to business transactions and their analysis, where you’ll be taking a trip around the whole accounting cycle. You’ll have to fill out a journal, ledger and unadjusted trial balance then adjust that trial balance using the adjusting entries normally provided to create your income statement, balance sheet, closing entries and the end goal, the post-closing trial balance. Sounds like a lot of work, but it’s seriously not that difficult if you do your homework! It’s also best to invest in an actual journal and worksheet, instead of solving on sheets of yellow pad that can easily be misplaced.

Statistics and Probability

Stat was weird for me in the sense that our lessons were generally ambiguous unlike what their names insinuated and I seemed to understand everything while it was being discussed but the minute I got home to work on assignments, I found myself staring at a wall until a friend who actually knows what to do goes online on Messenger. Later on, I found out it was because I needed to practice on my own to be familiar with the procedure instead of trying to memorize all the steps when it depends on the type of problem. We covered random variables, probability distributions, normal distributions, sampling, estimation of parameters and hypothesis testing (which was actually quite fun).

If you’re not keeping up to speed with everyone else, please do work on it as early as possible. The lessons here are somewhat connected to each other so if you failed to catch the drift on one of them, it’ll create a chain reaction and by the last topic, you’ll have zero knowledge of how to solve anything. Ask help, preferably from your teacher because not only do they explain it most accurately but it helps them see your initiative to do better, which they take into consideration when computing for your final grade. Do not settle for the exercises found on the book. Make your own, if you’re in the mood to cramp your hand, or turn to websites like The Oxford Math Center for useful worksheets with answer keys.

Contemporary Art

The very bane of my existence. The perfect way to sum up this subject in six words. Art was never my strength, anyone who knows me is aware that I can’t draw to save my life, but it didn’t really have much of a dent on my report card since it happened to be a minor subject. But thanks to the implementation of the new curriculum, it is given a new sense of purpose as a core subject with a weight of O N E. We had dealt with the different periods of Philippine art extensively, the National Artists of the country and different contemporary art forms such as film and the oddly interesting performance art. (Trigger warning for some graphic content though, so do be careful when searching these up!)

Activities ranged from making presentations similar in format to those in Pagbasa at Pagsuri, creating manifestos for the Philippine youth in relation to their role in the art world, holding a class exhibit to display the work you’ve made and my favorite: going on a fieldwork to hunt for contemporary art in the city. All this will lead to the culminating activity: the creation of your very own output, where anything is possible and depends solely on the one calling the shots.

This art class is no longer focusing solely on the physical aspects of a certain work, but also on what it actually means and what its relevance to society actually is. So, a good tip would be to always look at the bigger picture when given something to analyze! It’s hard at first, I admit I didn’t have much to say during the first few meetings but as the floor is opened to more interpretation and intellectual discussion, you’ll get the hang of it and instinctively feel the need to join in.

** We are about to dive in a zone that is fittingly named The Deadly Trio. ** Actually, if these were stand-alone subjects, I’d be fine but the fact that there are three of them in one semester when they’re basically discussing the same things and giving the same ridiculous amount of take home work was enough to drive me up the wall.

Practical Research

As implied by the very name of this subject, the main focus would be the creation of a qualitative practical research paper throughout the entirety of the semester. Discussions here were very minimal, as the teacher thankfully wanted us to focus on getting as much work done in the classroom as possible. I slacked off moderately during her period instead of lessening what I’d have to do at home, and in the end I ultimately suffered. But anyway, topics discussed include the importance of qualitative research, finding a good topic and sources to build it up, reviewing different types of literature, understanding and collecting data and further analyzing it to later on be able to report our findings.

One another thing to look forward to (not in a good way) is the dreaded thesis defense, where your paper will be dissected and closely examined for any possible shortcomings and held against you in front of a panel. It doesn’t always have to be the bane of your existence: as long as you contributed to the making of the project, you’ll know enough that you won’t be humiliated the minute you open your mouth.

A tip to take into consideration is to choose the right groupmates. Unless teachers pre-determine who you end up working with for two straight quarters (in that case, you’ll just have to learn how to accept your fate, whether it is for better or for worse), as much as possible, go for those who are responsible and actually care about their grades. It’s never fun to work with people who send you a montage of copy-pasted statements from Wikipedia pages and pass it off as their “contribution”, go offline Messenger the minute you even think about asking for help and think that printing the paper is a valuable addition to the team.

Reading and Writing

Contrary to what I initially thought, this was not the counterpart of Pagbasa at Pagsuri in the English language and I was thankful in a way because God knows the pain that inflicted upon me. The first quarter starts off quite easy, with critical thinking, fundamental reading skills, selecting and organizing information and critical reading skills. It may sound like a mouthful, but most of these are stuff you’ve picked up long before, without the assistance of a teacher! Some people may find patterns of development a hard topic, but if you read books, I guess identifying them just comes natural to you.

The latter part of this subject is where the ugly stuff goes in. I personally felt deceived into thinking that it would be as simple as our first lessons: identifying and writing the thesis statement and topic statement then it suddenly escalates and turns into SO MUCH ACADEMIC WRITING. When I saw that we were going to be making book reports and article critiques, I shelled out some of my favorite fictional reads and Man Repeller stories of the month only to find out that we’d be reviewing serious, educational material with very specific and strict guidelines to follow to make it as formal and cohesive (and basically not fun) as possible. Research reports, project proposals and position papers will also be in the works at some point: they are very structured and usually have to revolve around topics that are related to your strand, so there is a chance you may find it boring.

English for Academic and Professional Purposes

When I saw I had this for a subject, I was actually glad at first since English has always been my forte. So I was anticipating a repeat tutorial on all parts of speech and the basics of the subject-verb agreement when in reality, all I got was a dupe of Reading and Writing. Which is why, I had no idea why we had to take up both of them during the same semester.

Besides all subjects that required the submission of a research paper as some sort of culmination, this was the most demanding in terms of written output. During the first quarter, it’s still permissible to chill as you’re only going through reading and writing different types of academic texts (does this sound familiar to any of you?) but as the next one rolls along, BOOM. Reaction paper. Reflection paper. (Yes, there is a difference.) Concept paper. ANOTHER position paper. Report.

Now, if you’re already thinking about how you’re going to make it through when your writing is as lifeless and flat as can be (e.g. It is a sunny day, I ate an apple, I need to pee), don’t sweat it. That is exactly what your EAPP teacher will be looking for anyway. Academic texts do not require flowery writing that went through EDSA traffic before getting to the point (which was obviously an inconvenience for me): nobody cares about your opinion unless they say so and even if they do, they’ll probably require a sentence limit.

Well, that’s a wrap! I spent approximately twelve hours working on this post: one of which was spent on the Kitkat bench in Landmark trying to find a catchy way to start it off, and my eyes hurt and I may be suffering from carpal tunnel but all of that means nothing as long as I’ve been able to guide one hopeless soul out of the dark. I’ll be back with much lighter content very soon if I can factory reset my head and get it to work properly again.

Stay in school, kids!

Angel

#advice #grade 11 #senior high school #k to 12 curriculum #philippines #angeltriestoblog #pagod na ako #recs #life dump

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islambeyondtheveil-blog · 8 years

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My Very Own Story

Salam Alakum to all those out there!!! I am a 37 year old female who has been a convert for 12 years in the USA. I created this blog because of the homelessness I have experienced as a Muslim women in part due to me being a Muslim convert and because I have seen A LOT OF HOMELESS MUSLIM WOMEN in my last 12 years, I have in my last 12 years faced homelessness on and off just because of being a Muslim convert. I was actually homeless when I converted to Islam a single mother with 2 children bouncing around from job to job working as many as three jobs at once trying to survive and take care of my children. It was not easy. I turned Islam as a source of peace and serenity. However, it also contributed in my acute homelessness. Before converting to Islam I was hidden homeless stay with friends and family and bouncing around. Once I became Muslim that all changed I became acutely homeless for a period of time. I was a Muslim for one month and then brought to Chicago by some Muslim men who helped me out to get an apartment. I transferred jobs. I was not accustomed to honor and shame culture nor was I experienced with Muslim dominated cultures such as Arab culture or Pakistani culture. I was quit to be recruited for marriage and it was not a story with a happy ending. It was an imam looking to use me for papers for one of his relatives, his plan was to marry me religiously, then once he got me overseas he said marry him in the court, but I later learned he had his brother on my visa application not him. Well, once he told me I would be moving overseas and staying there and he wasn’t staying with me, he was moving back to the USA with another wife and I would stay in his country, I couldn’t go to the store, but his 6 year old son could, I let my friends know what he told me after the marriage nuptials “religious ones” not in the court, they whisked me off from him, later forcing him to religiously divorce me. His plan was a very disguised plan to marry me off in the court for a green card, maybe sell my citizenship, but nonetheless it was an attempt at human trafficking and not a real attempt. He didn’t even tell his community he had married and subsequently they fired him as the imam. I was left homeless again and without a job. The local masjed in BRIDGEVIEW, IL wouldn’t help me in my situation that was about 12 years ago now. However I was able to rent a room from another convert who had been a convert 20 years. She had horror stories about her time as a convert and had faced homelessness as well. Then another convert friend of mine moved to North Carolina where she asked me to visit her Palestinian husband was a gas station manager, he offered to give me a job, so I hit the road and went to NORTH CAROLINA! Yeahs was excited. I got there and they offered for me to stay with them and he would give me a job. Although after a week he said he wouldn’t only hire me if I let him keep my paycheck and he would manage all my money. I said no that is ridiculous, I can pay rent from my paycheck and manage my own money. He asked me for $600 for staying at their house and then he kicked me out because I refused. I was left homeless again. Living in my car in a small city in North Carolina. So I managed to get a job working in retail making a little money and was in school online so had some money from financial aid. I was able to rent a room on craigslist after about a week of sleeping rough in my car. I had no idea there was a mosque but didn’t think to ask because I had the mosque in Chicago refuse to help me. I worked there for a while that year and was able to rent a small house for $400 a month on an old plantation, it had some real issues including well water that was very bland and I think poisoned with lead or fracking residue. It was orange and stained like rust. I had no other options. I meet some Muslim ladies that helped me get some furniture. But I lost my job again after having to go to court for my kids. Of course as a single mother who converted to Islam I needed family help and that I did get, at the expense of them alienating me from my children after I gave them temporary custody. But Islam was my foundation regardless all these foul experiences with Muslims… I kept up the faith. So Then the Imam who I married for like a month actually was still married but separated. I became friends with his wife an she told me about MUSLIMA.COM to find a spouse. She said Islam is half your deen you should get married and your husband will take care of you. I had tons of offers on there. I was skinny, a convert, cute, and religious. Except I was naive to think they were all genuine. I met a Moroccan man who told me he was a green card holder and had it all worked out. I refused to sponsor anyone. BUUUUT didn’t ask to see his papers in my face. We did marry after talking for 3 months. We never kissed or touched until the moment we married. I was very religious at that time. I was praying all my prayers, wearing a hijab and abaya mostly very conservative cloths. I was very happy with the faith and even I didn’t have any Muslim friends. Everything seemed like a fairy tale, he was handsome, romantic, we seemed to have everything in common. But not until after a month of marriage did he break it to me, he couldn’t work, nor had any money, and also, didn’t have a sponsor for his papers. His visa was expired. I was like seriously??? I had no idea what to do. I offered him $500.oo of my student loan money to go back from where he came from. But I hurt his feelings, he swore up and down he was in love with me. So I prayed about it. Yes I did pray salata istikara before the second marriage, I didn’t know what it was the first time around. By the way that Imam was a PHD in sharia Islamic jurisprudence, fiq and usul fiq from a Uni Saudia Arabia. What a jerk!! Ok back to marriage two. I was like barley surviving and now I was going to be homeless again with this guy from morocco who apparently I adopted. Like I needed another person to $$$$ dish money out for when I couldn’t even take care of myself. Guess what I asked everyone to help sponsor him. Friends, family, strangers, yes I did ask tons of people to help. But he had some friends in Florida so we went to Florida. Well there I got a job right away a good job too that allowed me to sponsor him. So I did for the sake of ALLAH and gave him the benefit of the doubt he was a good guy. He was my brother in Islam after all. And no the imam that married me to him didn’t ask him anything related to him needing a sponsor or if he could afford a wife. Notta. Just bismillah you are now husband and wife. Well, I only asked him to memorize a surate with me. He never even would pray with me let alone read the Quran. His total attitude changed once in Florida after I started the sponsor paper work. There were lots of red flags but I kept praying ALLAH would fix things. I ended up losing my job due to discrimination AGAIN……. AGAIN!!! But we were still married. He did work but I did get income from unemployment too. In fact the whole time we were married he didn’t spend money on me. I was financially contributing. He also managed all the money and yes–that was a mistake cause he was taking all my money. The only thing I got from him in the marriage was a new phone, the phone company gave for free with a new contract. Around the time limit being over for the temporary green card I was very sick and in and out of the hospital. I almost died and was very ill. He had me sign papers he said immigration needed another application for another temporary green card for him. I was sick during the last few years of marriage. Well besides all the red flags, he decided he was just going to abandon me and leave me. He said I got my green card in the mail and I never loved you. He put his stuff into his car “I payed for” and was going to leave me in an apartment with everything in my name. Just like that. Not even one care about me not having money, not having a way to survive, not having a support system. Nothing. He had what he wanted. I called police cause he tried to leave. I reported that he just got his green card. He stayed for another week. But he became very abusive. He put a knife to my throat and said that if I do not apply for divorce he was going to call the police and say I came after him with a knife and tried to stab him. I APPLIED FOR DIVORCE THE VERY NEXT DAY. Yes I did!!!!! And yes alhumdulilah I just said ALLAH knows best. So I ended up homeless again. Yes I did, and very sick and almost dying this time. I was staying with friends, and in my car. I tried to stay at the mosque but they said it was not a homeless shelter that I needed to leave or they would call police on me. I was very lucky alhumudlilah wasn’t for very long. But I was able to get a very bad paying job at Disney World and was able to rent a condo for my entire pay. I was really sick though and my medicine costed $80,000 a year if I didn’t have it to stay alive I would die. So I decided to head back to Chicagoland area. I had a friend I kept in touch with for the past 9 years while I was moving all around. She said come back to Chicago. So I did, got back to Chicago, only for her to try and force me to marry a man who needs papers, apparently that is a thing in Chicago. She also tried to some other very serious criminal stuff to me. But she was also doing this to other homeless women in the community. Yes I reported this as human trafficking. Either born Muslim or not, that is not right. So I ended up at the masjed once again at Bridgeview, IL and face to face with the IMAM who said not one word about how he was sorry, didn’t offer any support, no referral, no community referrals, nothing, just told me well there is a hotel down the street, JUST GET LOST - that the masjed is not responsible for the homeless. So after this experience, of being rapped, a domestic violence victim, repeatedly homeless due to discrimination and lack of support from the Muslim community I stopped, I repeat STOPPED wearing the hijab. I have also started really hating mosques, imams and Muslims. WORSE is that born Muslim women also face homelessness, its not a convert only thing. And there is no support or love for us in need at all. We are hidden and shamed. I mean if we were a shinny new mosque they would pay for us. But no because we are not valued members of the community we don’t matter, nor does our needs or problems. But Muslims are very much the problem here, born men and women Muslims often shame those in need. My experience had made me question my faith in the end. I feel like there should be some awareness around the issue. So I created this blog for ladies to share there stories.

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airoasis · 5 years

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