#it’s almost like a Hail Mary for him. he has this problem of obsession but with your gentle words and affirmations it gives him a chance

[cloudyyangel]

HELLO??? your tags on my shiggy post?? g*d !! 'he'll take nothing less than total devotion'.....devotion is just...the perfect word choice bc he is the personification of the 'love is my religion' philosophy. ur mind is so !!!

Your mind!! Your mind is so >>>>!!!! Like I’ve always seen Shigaraki as having parallels to godhood/royalty but you absolutely blow it out of the water every time.

[pocketfulofrogers]

Planes, Trains, and Firetrucks

Pairing: Kelly Severide x Reader

Summary: What’s a polar vortex to a desperate sister trying to get home? With a little determination and the luck of a stranger, you might just be able to pull off a Christmas miracle. 

Notes: So I got drunk with my aunt and uncle on Thanksgiving and watched the only Thanksgiving movie to both exist and be quoted in it’s entirety by my whole family. I woke up with a google note that said ‘Planes, Trains, and Automobiles but make it a love story.’ Kinda wished I had payed more attention to the movie now. 

Pinching the bridge of your nose, you try to reign in your frustration. You had been all over this airport for the last six hours desperately searching for any way to get home. So far, you had only been strung along.

“Is there anything to Chicago at all? I’m just trying to be back for even a portion of Christmas. Seriously, at this point I’d saddle up a horse.”

The woman scrunches her nose as she scrolls through her computer, a sense of defeat looming over you until she smiles quickly. “I found a 5am to Detroit that connects…” She trails off and begins to frown again. “Just canceled.”

“Seriously?!” The word explodes from your mouth unwarranted and much louder than intended and your hand flies to your mouth in embarrassment.

Before you can begin to apologize profusely, you hear the man behind you mumble under his breath. “Probably because of the giant winter storm and white out conditions covering the entire North East.”

You whip your head behind to glare at him, but he’s too focused on his phone to even notice that you had overhead him. Defeated, you turn back around and quietly apologize before grabbing your phone and sulking away, the guy behind you chuckling slightly.

Mom: Your sister just got here, she’s so excited to see you!

Barely managing to suppress your groan, you lean against a nearby pillar to type a response that hopefully won’t break anyone’s hearts.

The man pockets his phone and approaches the counter. “Hi, can I get a hotel voucher?”

“We’re prioritizing vouchers for flying families and couples first.” She smiles.

“Really?” He groans, loud enough to grab your attention and hears your chuckle from what he assumes you think is karmic justice. But when he locks eyes with you, he gets an idea. “That is so kind of you guys!” He exclaims with a smile. “My wife will love that.”

In the middle of trying to explain to your mom that you couldn’t have left any early, chuckles steps up in front of you with a grin, holding up a pamphlet and you narrow your eyes. “Be my wife for a night, cow girl?”

You roll your eyes and walk away from his laughter and fake apologies, not stopping until he calls your name. “This?” You gesture between the two of you. “This is creepy.”

He holds up his hands before sliding the voucher in his dark jean jacket pocket. “They wouldn’t give me the voucher unless I put another name down so I just said you were my wife.” He shrugs his shoulder as if he can’t see the problem. “Now I can’t check in unless you’re there.”

You grab your bag and start walking again. “Not my problem.”

To your dismay, he keeps up with you. “We’ve been running around this place all day, so you have got to be at least a little tired.” You really were. “I let you use my charger.” He did do that, but it doesn’t seem to him that his small act of airport kindness has swayed you. “How about we get some sleep and then I promise I will help get you to Chicago?”

This causes you to pause again and look him up and down, almost hating yourself for even considering it. Those piercing blue eyes didn’t seem to hold any malice, nor did his small smile. He was charming, that much was obvious, but so was Ted Bundy.

You cock a hip to the side. “You could be a serial killer.”

The smirk he flashes makes you a little weak. “So could you.”

“Fine, but we’re stopping for pepper spray.”

**

Each time Kelly closes his eyes and feels his exhaustion begin to pull him under, he hears you curse under your breath. You had been obsessively scouring the internet looking for a hail mary, but each time you hit a wall.

He had given up somewhere between the last car dealership left in a 100-mile radius to endure your guilt trip and the proposition of hitch hiking. Honestly, he was more concerned than surprised when you seemed disappointed at him shooting down the idea.

Despite this budding friendship, you had offered no details of yourself, even when asked. You made another serial killer joke when he asked you why it was so important you get home, but he didn’t miss how guarded you became.

The next time you groan is when he also gives up the idea of any form of rest. Kelly sits up quick enough to see you throw yourself back into the creaky swivel chair.

“Is there a battery pack on you or something?” His voice is gravely, thick with exhaustion and just a hint of frustration.

You wince. “I know, I’m sorry. I just can’t believe that there’s not a single taxi or rental car available.”

“You could just buy a car.” He suggests it as an outlandish joke, but then your eyes light up.

“You’re a genius!”

**

Standing out in the middle of an alleyway, snow coating your hair, you can’t say your not a little nervous. Kelly is stood beside you despite very loudly voicing his opinion on how this was a terrible idea. Actually, that it was maybe the worst idea you’ve ever had.

“If anyone is going to be a serial killer, it’s going to be this guy.” He mumbles another remark, shifting his eyes to check your surroundings again.

You shoot a glare at him, but have to admit he’s probably right.

There wasn’t much in your bank account to spare, especially when you consider the price of a decent car. Craigslist offered one result in your price range within reasonable walking distance and you didn’t really stop to think it out.

Now you were in a barely lit backstreet leaking a smell you’d rather not name.

“You didn’t have to come.” You state, again.

He scoffs. “With your lack of self-preservation and this piece of shit that won’t make it out of the state? I won’t be responsible for you ending up on a milk carton.”

You want to comment that that’s not a thing anymore, but he had stuck by you for the last few hours and that’s more than you can usually expect from a stranger. “Aw, you care.” You reply instead.

**

It smells, terribly, but if you roll the windows down enough, you can hardly even notice. Wearing enough layers to not fell the cold is another story. You had expected Kelly to bail on you, insisting you wouldn’t blame him for running back to the warm comfort of clean sheets that weren’t his own, but again he shook his head.

He slept for the first six hours, grateful that you seemed to be a decent driver, but you tossed and turned in the back for about four before you climb back up front and ask to take over. There was only a little bit of gloating each time you passed through a city and grinned an ‘I told you so’ at him.

He doesn’t tell you, but he finds your giddiness contagious.

You don’t notice, but he keeps watching you whenever you’re not paying attention- intrigued by the woman who is actively going to hell and back just to get home. Matt told him he was insane, but there was something about you that he just couldn’t let go of.

He had watched you give up one of the only plane tickets left to a younger woman. Feeling touched as she cried in your arms. When you bought lunch for an unaccompanied minor and let her use up the entire battery life of your phone to watch a few movies, he knew he had to at least talk to you.

The only opener he had was a charger and it seemed to have been enough to get your trust.

“You know,” He starts, pulling his jacket tighter around him, hoping the rising sun would bring some form of warmth soon. He wasn’t hopeful. “I think I’ve earned a few questions.”

You glance at him and raise a brow. “Fine.”

“Are you always like this?”

“I’m sorry, what?” Your surprise makes you laugh.

“Prickly.” He clarifies.

“I’m not prickly, I’m stressed.” You defend yourself. “How are you not? Aren’t you trying to get home too, to see your family?”

He shrugs. “It’s out of my control, and the only family I have are people I get to see pretty regularly.” He smiles at you. “Guess I’m pretty lucky.”

“Well, it seems I’m definitely not.”

As if on cue, there’s a loud pop from the front of the car and it begins to sputter and smoke. Kelly is quick to calm you down and ease you into pulling off the road in the most soothing voice you think you may have ever heard.

**

Sitting on the side of the road, you only pick up your head from your knees when you hear a loud sigh and the hood slam shut. Kelly wipes the dark grease on his pants and gives you a solemn look.

“It’s toast.”

You let your head fall back onto your knees, not paying much attention to the encouraging words he tries to use to raise your spirits or the almost comforting hand on your shoulder, not even when they both disappear.

It isn’t until he’s grabbing the bags from the worst impulse buy of your life that you decide to check back in. “What are you doing?”

He points back to a semi-truck stopped not far behind with a smirk. “I told you I’m lucky.”

**

Your elbow bumps the trucker again and you pull you arms in closer to your body, try to scoot further away while being mindful of Kelly pressed close to you on your other side. Why you agreed to sit in the middle, you’ll only understand once you figured out why you agreed to this in the first place.

The man seemed nice enough, but it was two hours to the next city and you hadn’t slept in 36 hours.

“I don’t know what we’re going to do when we get there. Maybe find some wifi and look for our next ride?”

Kelly purses his lips. “How about we take an hour?”

“What are we supposed to in Dyersville on Christmas day?”

There’s a sparkle in his eyes when he smiles and shrugs his shoulders.

**

“Alright. This was a good idea.” You mumble around a mouthful of the burger you were trying to not inhale.

Somehow, Kelly had managed to convince a food truck to kick out one more order before packing up to get home. The smell hit you just as your hunger did and it didn’t take long for you to start stuffing your face.

He picks up his drink beside him on the bench and nods. “We needed this.”

“So bad.” You gush. You look around and finally feel like you can breathe again. “Maybe my luck’s turning. It’s a beautiful day, we’re so close, and this just might be the best burger I’ve ever had.”

He starts to laugh, but stops suddenly when he looks past your head. Before he can even react, the man he had been eying grabs your purse and takes off, Kelly quick on his heels. You yell after him, almost taking off too, but then his feet catch a patch of ice.

He goes down, hard and you rush to his side.

“Kelly? Kelly are you okay?” He’s touched by your concern, but he doesn’t have the breath in his lungs to convey it.

“Fine.” He grunts out.

“You folks alright?” A man with peppered hair and a thick grey mustache approaches behind you in a white button up. “We were just fixing our lights outside when we saw what happened. We’ve got two EMTs grabbing their bags if you’ll just stay where you are, son.”

Kelly waves him off, calling him chief, and tries to sit up. “Guy got her bag.”

You shush him and quickly help him up. “There’s nothing in there that can’t be replaced.” You assure him.

“Holy shit, is that Kelly Severide?” A woman calls out from across the street before jogging over. “Can’t wait to let the boys know that the great Lieutenant got played by a kid.”

Kelly chuckles at your confusion as he wipes his dirt covered hands on his jeans. “Gomez, nice to see you again.”

“You know each other?” You ask.

Gomez nods. “Lieutenant Severide here held a rope rescue training, whipped us all into shape. What brings you back here?”

Kelly sighs, adding a voice to the very rough time the last 20 hours had been. “Got snowed in just outside of Seattle. This one,” He points over to you and raises a brow. “Just had to get home and dragged me on and insane trip.”

Your jaw drops. “Dragged? You definitely refused to leave.”

“Only because I whole heartedly believed you’d get yourself killed.” He winks at you and you can’t suppress your smile.    

The chief contemplates for a moment before offering up an old battalion car to get you through the final stretch. Kelly looks to you, smile beaming and makes another comment about his impeccable luck.

**

“So, you’re a firefighter.” You begin when the silence becomes a little too thick. “Is that why you were in Washington?”

Kelly nods. “Small city fire departments don’t have the resources we do. I try to go to a few a year to teach them how to use the stuff they have for difficult rescues.”

“Wow…” You trail off.

“You can’t ask me that question and not answer it for yourself.”

Rolling your eyes, you have to agree. “I was there for an interview. Some doctors there created a revolutionary treatment, and I was able to witness one of the surgeries.”

“Must be important for you to give up your Christmas Eve.”

You shrug. “My sister got really sick a few years ago. She’s okay now, but we weren’t able to see her for a really long time. Doctors saved her life and this could save someone else’s. It’s important information.”

“That’s why you wanted to get back?”

The moment becomes a little too heavy, but you manage a sad smile before you feel compelled to look out the window. “It’s her first Christmas since, it’ll be the first time I’ve seen her.”

He grabs your hand and your attention after a moment of silence and his stare is intense. “We’ll be there soon.” He assures you.

**

12 hours into shift and Matt Casey is as bored as he’s ever been on a Christmas. No calls, no Christmas spirit, and most importantly Christmas dinner was a bust. So, when Severide open his office door, covered in dirt and oil and grime, he was intrigued at least.

“You look like hell.”

Kelly rolls his eyes. “I need to borrow your truck to take Y/N home.”

Casey’s eyes widen. “She’s here?”

Kelly isn’t sure why he seems so excited until he hears him grab almost the entire firehouse to lead them to the floor. To you. Despite his protests, Gabby is positively thrilled. You however, surprisingly, are not overwhelmed by all the greetings and hugs. The environment is so warm and welcoming that you can’t help but slide right into conversations.

“She is gorgeous.” Gabby tries to keep it to a whisper. “Your texts do not do her justice.”

Kelly nods, well aware that just a few words typed while you were focused on the road could never be enough to describe how incredible he believed you to be.

“This isn’t it, right? You’ve got to see her again.” Joe butts his head between Kelly and Gabby. “We already like her.”

**

The drive to your house is quiet, somber. Not a single sound besides tires crunching through packed snow. There’re so many questions you have unanswered based solely on the fact that you don’t know how to ask them. Staring out into the night sky to watch the snow fall is no longer enough to comfort you.

It isn’t until he pulls up and puts the truck in park that you start to feel the pit in your stomach become overwhelming. You’re worried you’ll never see him again. Worried that the past day will be the final one and that thought is terrifying.

“Stay.” You blurt out.

He’s caught off guard by your request, but still smiles. “My family is back at the station and this is too important for you to be worrying about your parents meeting me.”

Your nod acknowledges that he’s right, but your eyes convey your sadness. “Merry Christmas, Kelly.”

“Merry Christmas, Y/N.”

**

“I cannot believe you just let her go!” Matt walks in on Gabby yelling. “You liked that girl, she invited you in, and you left?!” She’s pacing back and forth in front of a freshly showered Kelly. He looks like a puppy in trouble and Matt’s smart enough to know not to butt in.

“That was not a first impression I wanted to make.” He tries to defend himself.

Gabby turns to Matt, exasperated, and he raises his hands.

As if someone were listening to his silent prayers, Capp comes in to tell Kelly that he had a visitor on the floor. His heart began to race, filling with hope that maybe, just maybe…

He rounds the corner and there you are, dressed up with a delicate smile. For a moment he’s breathless, the only thing he wanted to see. He wants to open with something witty, but you beat him to it when you hand him a tupperware container, stepping close enough that he can smell the light layer of perfume you’re wearing.

“This is to thank you for letting me drag you and your luck all over the northern states.”

He laughs. “I believe it was me that refused to leave.”

“And I probably would’ve made the national news for being missing if you hadn’t.” Your smirk makes his heart skip a beat. “You know milk cartons aren’t a thing anymore, right?”

He laughs. “Well, how am I supposed to thank you for pretending to be my wife?” You laugh until you realize he’s being serious. “How about dinner tomorrow night?”

“I would love that.”

When he leans down slowly and presses his lips to yours, you have to laugh at the cheers that erupt from the background.

[nerdgenie]

Vermish musings - part 2

Here's the second part of my not quite a fic but close enough? Part 1

They ended up talking all night. They talked about everything and anything while carefully navigating away from discussing anything that had to do with their relationship. They both didn't realize they stayed the entire night until the first rays of sunlight started trickling in through the window. To Hamish’s surprise, Vera agreed to get coffee with him in a cafe just outside campus. After their coffee, they eventually parted ways to go home and change before starting their day.

Vera's talking to him again -- like really talking, not brushing him off whenever he offers to help or giving him polite responses, Hamish observes. Okay, so Vera had never been very good at allowing people to help her. He has no doubt Vera can take on the world by herself, hell, she’s been doing it all this time, but that doesn’t mean she has too.  And he’d finally gotten through to her, but after she broke things off, she started closing herself off again. Vera doesn’t have any feelings for him. There’s a still a knife cutting through his heart because of that, one he suspects will never go away, and he can’t do anything about that. That, however, doesn’t mean he can’t be there for her as a friend. She deserves to have someone to help carry the heavy load she seems to always put on herself. He still wants to be that person, so it makes him extremely happy that she’s allowing him to do that again. She's finally giving him assignments and consulting him on different matters. It's a small victory, but he'll take it.

"Why is Hamish grinning like a drunk cat?" Lilith asks Jack. "Vera's asked him to help her with a research project this weekend." "She finally took pity on him then," Lilith snorted. "Let's hope so. I don't know how much longer I can take his moping."

Asking Hamish to help her with her research was a terrible idea. Most of the books they needed were at home. She'd taken them there before she even thought about asking Hamish for help because she knew the work would take all weekend, and she didn't want to be stuck in the temple. If she's working all weekend, she might as well do it comfortably at home. Then like the stupid idiot she is, she told Hamish about it. Hamish always drops by the temple after his classes are done, and she always sends him home. She knows he doesn’t want her to feel like she can’t rely on him for work anymore. She appreciates it, but she can handle the workload load. She’s not going to impose on the time he should be spending with his girlfriend. If she's being honest though, she’d admit that it just hurts too much to be around him and not be with him. But after that night, she's still a little worried about him and why he almost relapsed. She's not his sponsor, it's none of her business if Hamish doesn’t want to share his problems with her, and he did seem better, happy even, when they parted ways in the morning. She listed all the things why she doesn't have to worry about him, but she can't seem to get her brain to work where Hamish is concerned. She started asking him to help out with Order business again, so she can be there for him in case he needs it. Again, if she's being honest with herself, she'd also admit it that after spending a night talking with Hamish, she doesn't really know if she has it in her to stay away again. Cutting him off from her life was harder than she expected, and she really can't do it again. Which leads her to her predicament now. She said yes to Hamish's offer to help with the research before she remembered she's all set up at home. It's impossible to move everything back to the temple, so she basically invited Hamish to spend the weekend at home with her. Why does she get incredibly stupid around that man, she berates herself.

Hamish was surprised when Vera accepted his offer to help. He was even more surprised when she told him they’re working at home. She explained she's set up there, and it's too much work to move everything back to the temple. It makes complete sense, but it doesn't stop Hamish from being excited. He hasn't been back home, her house he corrects himself, since they broke things off, and he just wants it back. It's only for the weekend and only for work, but he can't bring himself to care. Spending the weekend with Vera in their home is all he wants, and thinking beyond that is too devastating so he refuses to do it.

Hamish showed up with coffee and breakfast at 7 in the morning. "Sorry, I know you like to sleep in, but with the work we need to do, I thought we'd get an early start." Hamish successfully got his mouth to work. He almost choked when Vera opened the door wearing his shirt and sleep shorts. It's nothing risque, nothing he's never seen before, but this is Vera without her armour. This is his Vera -- no makeup, hair still a mess from bed and in his shirt instead of business wear. He wants her so badly, but that's not what she wants, so he ignores the overwhelming pain in his chest.

"You're lucky you brought coffee and food. Can you set it up in the kitchen. I just need to change." She wasn't fully awake when she opened the door so she didn't immediately remember she's wearing his shirt when she opened the door. Hamish didn't comment on it because he really is a wonderful human being and doesn't want to embarrass her. She took a quick shower and put on yoga pants and hoodie. Her hair was still a little wet so she put it up in a bun and decided against makeup. Her skin needs to breathe. She had a hard week, and having Hamish at home is already frying her nerves, she just wants to be comfortable, okay? She doesn't need to obsess about her looks, too.

Hamish is navigating the kitchen like he belongs there. He used to, she thinks to herself. He's laid out the pastries he brought, but he's also cutting up fruit like he always does for her in the morning. She's very bad at feeding herself, and Hamish has taken on that responsibility. "Eat," he puts a plate in front her before handing her her coffee and sitting across her in his usual spot. If either of them observed they'd fallen back to how they were before, they're not going to examine that closely.

"Okay, I call time out." "Hamish, we've barely scratched the surface with this thing. There's still so much to go through." "Vera, it's 4 in the afternoon. I can't see straight anymore, and we haven't eaten anything since breakfast." Vera started to open her mouth with a reply when Hamish cut her off, "no, coffee does not count. Come on. Let's sit outside for a bit and get some fresh air. I'll order us some lunch." "Fine, but don't blame me if this takes all weekend." "Wouldn't want to be anywhere else." "Can you get..." "Pad thai, spring rolls and shrimp, yeah. It will be here in 15."

“I think we should call it a night,” Vera said glancing at the clock. She was surprised to see that it’s already past 11. “What? We’re finally getting somewhere. We can’t stop now.” They’re definitely on a roll. She doesn’t want to stop working as well, but they’ve made more progress together than she initially projected, and she figured she can complete the work on her own. “Hamish, I’ve already taken up your entire Saturday. I can’t thank you enough, but go home. You don’t need to do it.” “Vera, I told you, there’s nowhere I’d rather be. Let me just finish this chapter then I’ll go,” Hamish didn’t want to push her too hard. She’s been more open with him today, and he doesn’t want her retreating if he pushes too hard. “Okay, but I’m going to bed. Lock up when you go.” Vera didn’t think she can handle watching Hamish going home to the person he loves. “Will do.” “Hamish,” she turns back from the door. “Yeah.” “Thank you.” “Goodnight, Vera.”

Did someone break in? It’s 2 in the morning her clock says Vera was woken by the sound of someone stirring downstairs. “Hamish, what are you still doing here. I thought someone broke in.” “Vera, fuck, you startled me. Sorry, did I wake you? I found something...” “...and you just couldn’t leave it alone,” Vera finished for him, “I’ll make some coffee.”

While it was true that Hamish did finally find what they had spend the day looking for, he only managed it because he couldn’t bring himself to leave. The day had been perfect. He had his life with Vera back, and he didn’t want it to end.

They managed to finish everything just as the sun was starting to rise. “We make a great team, don’t we?” Hamish grinned at her. Vera snorted. They both have circles under their eyes, but they’re couldn’t be happier. After the initial satisfaction of a job completed wore off, Hamish started to feel dread set in. Is this it? Is this all he’ll ever get? He doesn’t know exactly where to go from here, but he knows he’s not ready for their time together to end just yet. “Are you hungry. I could make us some breakfast,” he throws a hail Mary.

“You know I love your breakfast, but shouldn’t you be going home to your girlfriend?” “My... what?” Hamish, for the life of him, could not understand why she’d think he has girlfriend. Oh, oh! Did she mean Cassie? It took several seconds before it clicked. Admittedly, he never really told Vera Cassie had left, but he assumed she found out some other way. She does talk to Jack and the other wolves. “Are you talking about Cassie? She left Belgrave 2 months ago,” he told her.

Hamish and Cassie broke up. No wonder he almost relapsed, Vera thinks. “Oh, I’m sorry. Is that why you...? “No! No, that’s not why I almost had a drink. Cassie and I never got back together. There was never anything there when she got back. Of course I’m happy she’s alive and well, but what we had was in the past. I don’t love her that way anymore.” Hamish explained in an almost panicked way. Hamish doesn’t fully understand why, but he can’t allow Vera to misunderstand what happened. He felt the need to tell her the truth -- that the one thing that truly push him to almost go over the edge was the idea of her being with someone else. He managed to get himself to step back, but Vera staying with him that night was what truly gave him the strength to stay sober. It’s not her fault that he can’t stand the idea of her being with someone else. That’s something he needs to work out on his own, but he recognized how Vera had tried to help him that night, as much as she tried to hide it from him. Vera deserves to be appreciated for how she cares about people. People rarely see that, much less thank her for it. He won’t be one of those people who doesn’t appreciate Vera.  He may be on a path to disaster by telling her his feelings, but she needs to know she’s saved him.

Vera’s confused again. “Ohh..” She really can’t form a coherent response just yet, but that didn’t seem to matter because Hamish doesn’t stop talking. “You went on a date,” Hamish stated. “What? Oh yeah... that wasn’t...” she tried to explain. “All I could think about how I could never have our life back. You were moving on from me, and I didn’t know how to handle that -- I still don’t if I’m being honest. But even when I thought I lost you, you were still there. Please don’t freak out. I’m not asking you for anything. I just need you to know that I see you. You care so much... about everyone...”

Hamish’s speech was interrupted by Vera’s lips on his. He still has a lot of feelings he needs to let out, but every single thought has left him. Nothing exists beyond Vera.

They’re both still shaking from their high. Hamish has pulled Vera almost on top of him after they came together -- her for the third time, he can’t help but smugly think. He’s never letting her go. He’ll stay in this bed for the rest of his life. “I love you,”  he looked down at Vera who was currently tracing patterns across his chest. His heart would not allow him to hold it in anymore. “I love you, too.”

Randall: “Has anyone seen Hamish. I haven’t seen him all week.”

Lilith: “He went to Vera’s last weekend. He hasn’t come home since.”

Jack: “Thank fuck. Finally.”

It only too forever, but I can’t leave you guys hanging. Hope you like it. @vlysian @everythingabouthatship @hellishseaqueen @seidling3