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pellicano-sanguino · 5 years

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I was recently made aware of the fact that there's a freaking Dragonlance musical (yes, made all the way back in 2014, I'm late on the news). It's uploaded to Youtube in full (according to them, it's uploaded with the permission of the creators) and with subtitles (it's a Russian production).

I went in expecting it to be just as badly made and cringeworthy as the animated movie, and I was motivated to watch it purely by nostalgic feelings about the books (they were the first fantasy books I read) and general interest in musical theater. But turns out I... actually liked it??? Not in a so-bad-it's-good kind of way, I genuinely found it enjoyable. What an unexpected turn of events.

Heh. Quality subtitles.

Disclaimer: It's been ages since read the books, so if I remember something wrong, feel free to correct me.

Now, this is not the next Phantom or Elisabeth or anything like that. This seems to be a rather small production. The props and effect are minimalistic and cheap, looking more like a bunch of larpers than actors (not saying larpers can't have great props, I used to larp myself when I was younger). The singing carries the story, there is very little spoken dialogue and the actors don't dance. We do get a bunch of background dancers, who at first seem really out of place crawling on the floor while the main actors just stand there and sing.

I'm also going to point out that the Dragonlance books are not the easiest or most obvious choice for a story to be adapted into a musical. These books have long, complicated plots that often arch over several books and have a whole bunch of characters. Also, being able to open the vast world and history of Krynn to an audience who may not have read a single book is challenging. Not gonna lie, I am unsure how much someone without any prior knowledge of the series will get out of this show. They do plot explaining surprisingly well but there are plenty of times where you're going to be a bit confused if you don't know the backstory.

The musical's name is The Last Trial, and it's (somewhat loosely) based on the Legends-series, describing the rise and fall of the dark wizard Raistlin Majere, who is probably the most popular Dragonlance character ever. Well, it's a wise choice, since you can tell this story with a slightly smaller cast and don't have to prop dragons. However, I question one thing. You're really going to make a musical about Raistlin? One of his trademark characteristics is his failing health, his violent, chronic cough, resulting in a creepy, raspy voice. And this is the guy you're gonna make sing.

More quality subtitles.

Oh yeah, and another thing I'm going to have to question. Are we really making this a love story? I mean, yeah, I get that all that happens between Raistlin and Crysania does also happen in the books, but I never saw any kind of romance between them. All I saw was a heartless bastard manipulating the feelings of a sensitive and naive woman. The impression I got of Raistlin from the books was a person who's asexual, aromantic and hates everyone (and who's not handsome by any standards, but rather creepy looking, especially his eyes). Not a romantic hero at all. But hey, I can kinda understand the appeal (after all, I do like such musicals as Phantom and Elisabeth, so I can totally see why a cruel and cold character gets all the fangirls; everybody likes bad boys).

The musical opens with a short introduction of this story's Greek Choir-character, Astinus. Astinus is tasked with recording the history of Krynn so he makes a good plot exposition role. I recall there being some hints that he might not be fully mortal. After the intro, stage lights reveal a violin player, who begins to play the musical's theme. The violin player stands out a little, since she's wearing modern clothes despite the story being set in a medieval-ish world. But I got to admit, the music is very, very nice, with a rather calm melody that fits the setting of a magical world of fantasy very well. This could easily be soundtrack for a fantasy movie. The beautiful music is what made me like this show.

Speaking of music, it's time for the main character to deliver the show's first song. Despite rolling my eyes at the thought of Raistlin singing with his ruined voice earlier, I have to admit, they chose the actor really well. There are at least two castings (maybe even more) of this show, and the one I saw, had Evgeny Ergorov playing Raistlin. His voice is very pleasant to listen and it carries hints of ambition, arrogance and of a powerful will that is calm and calculating but under its seeming calmness also very dangerous. I am surprised how quickly I accepted the fact that Raistlin can sing and that instead of having a voice that mirrors his suffering he has a voice that mirrors his might. The lyrics being in Russian helps, being sung in a language I don't speak a word of makes everything sound more magical and poetic. There is certain lyrical beauty to Russian and it fits the songs perfectly (obviously, since the songs were written to be sang in this language).

If we handwave the fact that Evgeny is way too pretty to be playing Raistlin (I'm presuming he's not that bad looking by het standards here, as a lesbian I'm not really the person to be judging male beauty), he looks the part and gets nicely into character. He has Raistlin's prematurely grayed hair, black robes and the staff with a glowing gem held by dragon claws. The musical goes out of its way to disrobe him, though, probably as a fanservice thing (robes really don't let you see his body well...). In the books I don't recall him ever wearing anything else, the mages in Dragonlance wore their robes everywhere like uniforms. Oh well, if wizards can prance around in muggle clothes in the Harry Potter movies, we can do the same here.

Evgeny has a rather strong stage presence. His eyes, while not as creepy as in the books, cast a very cold and powerful gaze, judging everything with distaste and cynicism but never underestimating anything in his arrogance. This Raistlin is full of pride but not blinded or hindered by it. The only trademark part of his character that I consider to be missing is his failing physical health, that creates an opposite to his powerful mind and allows him to manipulate people by using the compassion they feel when seeing a sick, suffering man. Many more prideful men would be insulted when offered help and proclaim that they can take care of themself, but Raistlin never does this; he relies on the help of others whenever it's convenient and never considers such a thing to be below the world's greatest wizard.

Astinus appears again and explains the next song number to the audience. In the war preceding the events in this show, Raistlin fought with a bunch of other heroes to defeat a dark dragon goddess called Takhisis, the primordial source of evil in the Dragonlance pantheon of gods. According to the musical, Raistlin's role was to work as a double agent – he swore an oath to Takhisis and became her servant only to stab her in the back so she could be sealed away in Abyss. It's been ages since I read the books, so I can't tell if this is how it really went. My faint memories claim it wasn't quite like that, but this is what the musical tells us so let's just go with it. Takhisis, the highest ranking of all the evil gods, is trapped in Abyss, but she still plots her escape and bears grudge to Raistlin. She can't enter the world of mortals in the waking world, but she can appear in their dreams.

Like evil, Takhisis takes many faces aside from her iconic multiheaded dragon queen form. She invades Raistlin's dreams in the form of the Dark Lady and torments him with nightmares and ominous predictions that he'll one day be her servant again and open the gate of her prison. In this version, Takhisis is played by Vera Zoodena. And wow. Just... wow.

Her Dark Majesty can easily be interpreted as a kinda succubus-like, sexy and seductive femme fatale (because god forbid we have evil female characters who aren't overly sexualized...). This kind of role is very easy to overdo and instead of intimidating and charismatic turn out to be just... cheesy and slutty. But Vera Zoodena knows that a revealing outfit and sexy posing isn't all you need for a powerful female villain. Yes, she is very much directed as seductive, but instead of making me feel like someone made her wear that costume and ordered her to pose like that, I feel that she is in complete control of everything. Vera's stage presence is amazing. Femme fatales rarely have any effect on me (well, they are usually geared towards a male audience anyway) but this Takhisis makes chills run down my spine when she sings. Her voice is so haunting and sexy, I can feel her fingers tipped with deadly claws menacingly caress my skin by just listening to it. (I'm sorry. I promise to keep the TMI to a minimum. But I'm totally hot and bothered for Takhisis.).

Raistlin's nightmares are interrupted by his twinbrother Caramon, who intuitively knows his brother is suffering and rushes to wake him up. Raistlin thanks Caramon for driving away the unwanted dreams, but remains distant. Caramon then begins to sing, advising Raistlin to give up his ambitious plan, which he now reveals to the audience; Raistlin intends to descend into Abyss and challenge Takhisis, ascending to godhood himself if he manages to defeat the goddess. We have fought our wars, says Caramon, the Dark Lady is safely locked away in Abyss and the world needs heroes no more. Well, that's easy for you to say, you're not the one getting your dreams invaded.

Let's talk about Caramon a little. He is supposed to be the opposite of his twin; physically strong but mentally not the brightest, a handsome fellow with a big heart that overflows with kindness towards his friends and family. No ambition, no selfish arrogance guiding his actions, all he longs for is a simple, comfortable life and he cares deeply about the wellbeing of his loved ones. Compare that to Raistlin, who cares not about the feelings of others, uses people as stepping stones to reach his own selfish goals and in his pride desires always more power; when he has become the most powerful wizard in the mortal world even that is not enough, he needs to challenge the gods.

While I do think the actors in this musical do a pretty decent job mostly, I have to say I'm a little disappointed in Andrei Loboshov playing Caramon. His acting is a bit wooden occasionally and he comes off as comically dumb sometimes (I mean yeah, Caramon wasn't the sharpest sword in the weapon rack but still). Also his voice is kinda mediocre compared to others. This is Caramon, he is supposed to be charming and lovable. And handsome. Again, I know I'm not the right person to judge male beauty, but compare this guy to the one playing Raistlin (who is supposed to be the ugly twin). Like, come on.

Raistlin refuses Caramon's offer of simple living. He points out that as a creepy weirdo he will never belong anywhere and will never be as accepted by others like someone normal like Caramon is. He is determined to seek godhood, and abandons his brother's company while making plans how to reach his ambitious goal. He receives a letter that informs him that a priestess of Paladine (the highest ranking of the good gods, adversary of Takhisis) called Crysania seeks to meet him. Fate seems to smile upon the dark wizard, for a priestess of Paladine is exactly what he needs for his plan...

So. Crysania. I have... mixed feelings about this character. On one hand, I admire the sincerety of her character, her genuine kindness (she is the priestess of the greatest of the good gods after all) and her determination to attempt to do the right thing. And yet she is doomed to betray her god out of her love for a heartless man. Stories about a pure maiden who falls in love with a cursed prince are numerous and the appeal of such stories is clear. However, Beauty and the Beast this is not. My main problem with Crysania is this: I fucking feel bad for what happens to her! She is dumb and naive and thoroughly amai and a very good example of what happens when a woman tries to ”cure” or ”save” a cruel man. It's not even her own fault because Raistlin manipulates the fuck out of her (and even if it were purely because of her own stupidity, victim blaming is bullshit so there!). I just want to rush in there and swoop her in my arms and give Raistlin the middlefinger like NO, you do not deserve the love of this woman, you do not get to use her for your ridiculous ego-inflating power fantasy plans, farewell and up yours!

When I read the books, I imagined Crysania looking unearthily beautiful, like a Greek statue come to life, and having an aura of holiness and piety in her voice. Here she is played by Elena Minina and damn, she is amazing. I don't know how they managed to find someone who so much resembles the official artwork of the character. I find her beauty stunning (just my opinion, there are probably a ton of people who consider her mediocre) and her voice is incredible. It's so clear, like the singing of birds and the sounds of running water on a stream, like silver bells tied to a dancer's ankle. I don't know how to describe it. I know nothing of opera or other top quality singing but I could easily imagine Elena being a truly professional singer. And this is really what made me fall in love with this show; the songs and the amazing singers delivering them.

Raistlin and Crysania meet in the city of Palanthas and have a little talk. Crysania reveals to the black mage that her god Paladine is aware of his plans and does not approve. She attempts to convince him to abandon his plan, not just for the good of mankind and the cosmic balance (the proper balance of good and evil is very important in Dragonlance pantheon) but for his own sake. Repent before it's too late and save yourself! Knowing that this is a chess piece he very much needs, Raistlin immediately goes into manipulation mode and starts to suggest things to Crysania. Oh, you came to me just as a messenger of your god? What if I told you he sent you to me for different reasons – to help me. He proceeds to flatter Crysania, praising her faith and purity (maybe to suggest that someone like her couldn't commit anything unholy, and thus can help him without fear of angering her god) and plants the idea to her head that light and dark mages aren't so black and white, and that sometimes dark magic is necessary to reach a noble cause.

Crysania listens and admits that Raistlin makes many good points but still she advises him to give up his plan. At this moment Raistlin has a coughing fit (the only time we see the fragility of his body in the musical) and Crysania's heart is immediately melted by compassion and she offers her help (as a priestess of Paladine she has healing powers). Raistlin accepts her healing magic but refuses her plea to bring him to the temple to be treated properly there, since even Paladine's clerics can't cure the curse that ruined his body. But appealing to her compassion works for his advantage, as did letting her get close and touch him (it's like he knows she's going to fall in love with him and attempts to bond with her to make it happen.). He insists on leaving but invites Crysania to meet him at the Tower of High Sorcery if she wants to speak with him more. Once she's alone, Crysania sings about how she understands that her fate is tied to this mysterious man who she used to think of as an enemy but is fast growing more fond and respecting of. She feels sorry for him and wants to save him so badly. Let the fire burn my hands, I will endure it or die trying. Meanwhile, I'm here whispering ”don't do it” under my breath. This is a very pretty song.

Astinus steps once more on stage. Crysania asks him how does Raistlin think he can break open the gate of Abyss. Astinus reveals that the gates of Abyss were locked so that they could only be opened by a black mage and a light priest working together (which the gods thought would be unthinkable, apparently, since that would be bringing together two sworn enemies). Crysania understands now what Raistlin had in mind for her. So, he thinks I'm going to be his key. Despite knowing this, she still wants to see him to learn more and asks how to find her way to the Tower of High Sorcery. Astinus tells her that the road there goes through the Grove of the Dead, making it a very perilous journey. Crysania considers this a test of courage set upon her by Raistlin and declares that she will go there.

Next we visit a charming little place called the Inn of the Last Home. The inn is run by Tika, Caramon's wife and she merrily spends time with the customers who sing and dance the night away. Tika is played by Irina Kruglova and it's a shame she has such a small role, since she has a lovely voice.

Back during the war Tika was one of the heroes and fought just as well as everyone else, but now has settled down since just like Caramon she longed for a peaceful, adventure-free life.

When I saw this character, I got worried. It looks like it might be a kender. Good grief, the goddamn kender are the worst thing Dragonlance universe came up with. * shudders* Back in my larp days there was a universally known unwritten rule among gamemasters: no more than one kender per ten other characters. Everyone obeyed this rule and good for them. I never got to play one, but a friend of mine did. She crawled under the tables and stole everyone's shoelaces.

The joyful tune is disturbed when Crysania comes in and asks if anyone can show her to the Grove of the Dead. Tika tries to convince her not to seek the Grove, explaining that wizards enchanted the forest so that non-magic users couldn't find a way to their tower.

The guests agree with Tika, no one knows what the Grove hides, for the Grove never returns its dead. Crysania is still determined, if no one comes to be her guide, she goes alone. The guests and Tika then come up with an idea to have Caramon go along to keep her safe. No one else dares to go there, but Caramon is a true war hero.

Unfortunately this is the exact moment Caramon enters the inn, drunk as a lord and holding a letter he wrote to Raistlin. Look, Raistlin sent my letter back unopened, and even wrote on top of it ”I have no brother.” The separation of the twins was hard for Caramon and he started to drink his depression away, becoming less like a hero and more like pathetic drunk every day. He sings a sad, drunken, wailing song about how this letter hurt him so deeply.

They are stealing his axe - they are kender! Out! Throw them out!

Crysania rolls eyes at such a guardian, baffled that the intelligent and well mannered Raistlin could have such a disgraceful twin and she goes forth on her own. Tika then shames Caramon for being such a wreck and giving everything up so easily like the opposite of Rick Astley and sends him after the priestess. Your brother messed with her head, now it's your job to get her back safely! Reluctantly Caramon goes, not thrilled to be back on the adventuring business.

The background dancers felt out of place earlier, but in the Grove of the Dead they fit in perfectly, creating an ominous atmosphere. These living shadows creep up to Crysania, who faces them without fear and sends them back with the power of faith. She's prevented from proceeding any further when she comes face to face with an undead warrior named Lord Soth.

In the books, the death knight was sent to assassinate Crysania by Raistlin's sister Kitiara, to prevent the opening of the gates of Abyss. Lord Soth failed in his attempt, Crysania didn't die but she was wounded. Kitiara doesn't appear in this musical, and we don't actually see Lord Soth wounding Crysania. Instead he just poses dramatically and seems to scare Crysania and Caramon from approaching the Tower. He and the rest of the shadows are sent away by Raistlin, who appears to sing a new song.

The song is all about how names have power. It's a very fitting song for a mage, but kinda out of place. I guess it implies that by the power of knowing the name and origin of the creatures of the Grove he can send them away and allow the travellers to reach the Tower. But it looks like he's singing it to Crysania, which makes no sense. Also, what is he doing there? He should be far gone by now, time travelling to the past (yes, this story involves time travelling, a kind of magic that I've always thought way too powerful to exist, since if you have the power to go back in time, wouldn't you be able to keep trying a thing over and over again until you reach a timeline where you're successful? Way too convenient for my taste in magic.).

In the Tower of High Sorcery the Conclave of Mages is holding a meeting re: what to do with Raistlin. There are the white robed light mages and the black robed dark mages, but where are the neutral red ones? Balance of power is important in Dragonlance lore, and besides the forces of good and evil there existed the middle path that was kinda allowed to do whatever they wanted because they held loyalty to neither side. They could have easily put some red mages in the background here, so I wonder why they didn't (local prop department only had white and black robes?).

The conclave calls forth Dalamar, an elf who was spying Raistlin for the Conclave while being his apprentice in dark sorcery. Dalamar reveals all that he knows of Raistlin's plans; that his teacher has time travelled to the city of Istar to look for the gate to Abyss and to learn from another dark wizard who lived there at the time. By doing so Raistlin has apparently broken some union laws the Conclave held and they are disgusted with this (I told you time travelling should be banned!). But then they decide to send Crysania back in time to Istar too, for whatever reason. In the book it was because she was injured and needed a level of healing only the clerics of Paladine back in Istar's days of greatness could offer. But here it's a bit unclear, since we don't see Crysania get wounded and the Conclave never mentions any reasons behind their decision to send her time travelling. Maybe they were just as naive as her and thought she could stop him. Crysania tells them she intends to prevent Raistlin from opening the gates of Abyss and they just... seem to go with it.

Dalamar and Par-Salian (leader of the Conclave) high five at their decision. Classy wizards are these.

One nice detail they kept are Dalamar's scars. You can see them on his chest. Raistlin wasn't born yesterday, he knew damn well that Dalamar was spying him and to show him that he knows, he burned the elf's chest with his fingertips like branding a calf. Just so you know, I'm on to your scheme and could dispose of you any time I want, I just don't think of you as a threat and don't care if the Conclave finds out because they won't be able to stop me. In the books Dalamar had a bizarre habit of flashing his scars to people. Look at what he did to me! No, stop, put your robes back on, nobody wants to see that, you kinky biscuit!

While the background people are working on propping Istar (mainly just covering everything in white), Dalamar sings a short song that reveals that he actually sends Crysania back in time because he is loyal to his teacher. Whatever you say, Dalamar. Whatever. Anyway, we have travelled back in time to Istar now. Everything and everyone is white and shiny and full of faith. Crysania is awestuck at the beauty of the city and the grandness of faith. Istar is a theocratic city state, and we also meet the guy who runs the city, known as the Kingpriest.

Good god, Alexi Tolstorkorov who plays the Kingpriest has the perfect voice for the role. It's a powerful, booming and majestic voice, making him sound like a charismatic cult leader when he preaches his truth. His voice demands respect and acknowledgment of his authority. Alexi is also rather tall, which makes him look properly intimidating. And considering they probably didn't have much of a budget, they propped him rather decently. Very good Kingpriest, 10/10.

Kingpriest. Dude. You’re saying that to a blind person!

Crysania finds Raistlin among the crowd (disguised as a cleric, because he's smart enough not to prance around in his black robes here) and informs him that Caramon got sent back with her as well but they got separated in the crowd. Raistlin didn't expect his brother to join Crysania in her attempt to stop him, but accepts this new turn of events and is already figuring out how to use it to his advantage. Raistlin tells her that he has already located the gates of Abyss here and soon they will open them together. I was expecting Crysania to tell him she has no such intentions, but here she just seems to... be too distracted by Wow such great city! Very pure! Much faith! Which is... awkward. Because this is fucking Istar, in the past. Crysania should know what happens to this city. Like, did they not teach history in whatever school priests of Paladine go to? Apparently they did not and it is up to Raistlin to open Crysania's eyes and reveal the ugly truth to the audience.

Raistlin sings a song about the corruption of Istar, how the priests are drunk with power and use it in manners that should be blasphemous to do in the name of good gods. Not only is magic and the worship of evil and neutral gods forbidden, some of the good gods are banned too and there's racism (I wholeheartedly cheer at the guards jailing kender, though.) and all other disgusting misuses of religion as justification for evil. The city if full of narcisstic men who put their own words in the mouth of god and present it as truth. It's interesting that Weis and Hickman came up with Istar, since Hickman is a devout mormon, so you'd think he's not the kind of person to present a theocracy as a corrupt cult. Anyway, Raistlin uses this moment to again cultivate in Crysania the belief that light and dark are not the same as good and evil. If priests of Paladine can be capable of such wickedness, then logic follows that a black mage can seek a noble cause. Maybe I'm not your enemy, aren't the ones who betrayed your god while claiming to serve him much more deserving to be your enemies? I only seek to rid the world of the source of all evil, while they seek to tear the whole world apart in their crusade against even the smallest shadow.

And then Crysania goes and confronts her fellow priests and the Kingpriest himself like the dumb shit she is, accusing them of their false faith and questioning their authority. Like good grief Crys, how fucking amai can you be?! Did you really think that one woman marching in front of a cultist leader and his brainwashed minions could make them see the light and better their ways by just shaming them? Like oh no, she is giving us the shounen anime protagonist Convincing Shouting treatment and telling us to give up our corrupt religion that benefits us greatly, whatever shall we do? Tell her she's right and that we are ashamed of ourselves for not noticing earlier? Or how about... we just burn her at the stake for heresy?

Seriously Crysania, did you stop for two seconds to consider what could go wrong with your master plan? Anyway, it's a very nice song between Crysania and the Kingpriest. It also shows Crysania's budding doubts about her faith. She is disgusted that she had to have this revealed to her by an enemy, that her brothers and sisters who she is supposed to trust were holding an ugly secret from her.

So, Crysania is held captive at the temple for heresy. Raistlin doesn't seem particularly concerned with this. Having Crysania doubt her faith works for his plan. Caramon gets imprisoned too, after asking people if they've seen his brother, who's a mage. Use of magic being forbidden, even family members of mages get thrown in jail. There Caramon sings a song how he trusts that his brother will soon come save him. It's sad to see Caramon projecting his own family loyalty to his brother who has never helped anyone if it wasn't relevant to his interests. You poor man, still blind to the truth that your brother can't be redeemed.

In the book Caramon was made to fight in a gladiator arena with other prisoners. This musical also makes him fight, but frames it differently. Here the Kingpriest arranges the fights to find the best warrior to be the Chosen One to deliver world of evil or something along those lines. Disguised as a cleric Raistlin declares Caramon as a volunteer to fight. He is brought to the arena but refuses to pick up his sword, because it's one thing to fight in a war and for self defence but this is just slaughter for the amusement of others and he wants nothing to do with it.

I like how when Caramon refuses to fight, his opponent strikes this seductive pose. Fight me, my love, you know you want to...

The Kingpriest is not pleased for Caramon's refusal. Raistlin explains to him that the man is an honorable knight (yeah sure) who cares not for his own life but will defend the life of another. He suggests that they bring Crysania to the arena. The Kingpriest agrees to this, and Caramon immediately picks up his sword to protect the lady. The fight is fierce and has surprisingly many real swordplay techniques used (I usually expect very little realism from stage swordfights). Yes there's still lots of unreasonable things like turning your back to your enemy and coming way too close during the close combat (you come to a distance I can punch you, you will get pommel to the face) but this is still one of the best stage swordfights I've seen. It's also unusually fast, more often stage fencing uses slower, wider strikes to make it easier to follow the fight. Here, I noticed many of the techniques used only when I was taking screenshots, they happen so fast.

I didn’t even notice this block by grabbing blade at first viewing.

Oh, this looks like a throw! Are they really going to do a throw?

Apparently yes.

I have to tip my hat to the guy who plays Purple Fake Dreads here. He is agile!

He is fierce!

He is bouncy!

Fly away, Purple Fake Dreads!

I especially like the move where he places his foot on Caramon's leg and steps up on it to kick him in the groin.

Go, go, Purple Fake Dreads!

Caramon, who fought more carefully and defensively than his aggressive and impatient opponent, wins the fight, and the Kingpriest grants him and Crysania their freedom as a reward. The citizens of Istar then begin a mass with the Kingpriest, and the chanting gets more and more ominous until everything goes red. The event known as Cataclysm happens.

Angered by the corruption and arrogance of the Kingpriest, the gods threw a fiery mountain down on Istar, sinking the city to the bottom of the sea, changing the landscape and geography of Krynn permanently. Raistlin, Caramon and Crysania escape the divine wrath by time travelling again, to a timeline little after the Cataclysm. This they do offscreen.

Having witnessed the destruction of Istar, Crysania grieves for the innocent lives struck down for the crimes of a few. Her faith weakens once more. Her god doesn't answer to her call, so Raistlin asks her to follow him, which she does. After all, he is the one who showed her the truth and hasn't lied to her, and for that she respects him. She still believes that her fate is tied to the dark wizard, but she is beginning to doubt if her role ever was to help him see the light and not the other way around.

Istar being at the bottom of the sea now, Raistlin can no longer use the gates in there, much to his annoyance. However, there is a second Gate hidden in Zhaman fortress, in a well guarded dwarf kingdom. The black mage needs to find a way to get inside, and simple knowledge of history tells him how to do it.

Caramon comes to his brother, demanding to know why he betrayed him and made him fight in the arena instead of helping him escape. After listening to this for a while, Raistlin tells him that he's being an idiot; arranging for him to get chosen to fight in the arena was his plan to get him out from jail. You got yourself arrested out of stupidity, getting you to be chosen as the one to fight wasn't easy either, you know. So don't come to me claiming I didn't help you and Crysania to get your freedom so we could all escape together instead of leaving you behind to go down with the rest of Istar!

Okay, I get it, Caramon admits. But I'm still done with all of this and I'm going back home! Oh really, Raistlin comments, what a shame, I could have used your help. It hurts me to see the change in Caramon as soon as Raistlin says that, because the dumb man doesn't understand that he's just being manipulated. Caramon is so desperate for any sign of brotherly love from his twin that as soon as Raistlin hints that he could help him, he's ready to do anything. Of course I will help you in any way I can, my dear brother! You poor man, you poor faithful dog wagging your tail no matter how many times your master mistreats you.

What Raistlin has in mind for Caramon is war. Around this time in history, there was a war waged against the dwarf kingdom. Raistlin intends to make history repeat itself, and he needs Caramon to lead the army. What army, it's just the three of us, asks Caramon. And then Raistlin begins to sing, while the background dancers begin what looks like a yoga session. Raistlin is a good speaker and manipulator, he easily convinces warriors to join their attack to Zhaman fortress. Knowing history helps him, for he knows what kind of people went into this war and what their motivations were. Little by little they gather quite an army to march into war. Caramon questions if what they are doing is the right thing and that they are lying to people to lure them into an unnecessary war. Raistlin convinces him the war is inevitable, and Caramon, too eager to please his brother, turns a blind eye to the unethicalness of it all.

While Caramon is working his hardest to earn them an entry to the gates, Raistlin focuses on working his mindgames with Crysania. He needs to get her to agree to go along with his plan. So he attempts to use her compassion, and sings to her a sad song about his childhood, colouring everything a little to make himself look more like a sympathetic victim of forces beyond his control. He claims to have began learning magic purely for self defence, being bullied as kid, and then goes on to claim that magic is an addiction that can't be fought once you've tried it. He also very clearly has become aware of Crysania falling in love with him and fans those flames as best he can, being all gentlemanly and nice to her even if he's a jerk when he's with his brother. This is one thing that people don't get about abusive people; they are perfectly capable of playing nice when it's beneficial to them and just because someone is ”such a nice guy” doesn't mean they can't be monsters.

Crysania is smart enough to call bullshit on Raistlin claiming to have always been an enemy to Takhisis, pointing out that he did fight on her side during the past war. But Raistlin pulls the ”It was all according to my plan, so I could betray her”-card out of his sleeve. I'm a traitor to both sides and both good and evil look forward to my funerals. Pity poor me who attempted to do what was right but ended up being unfairly hated by everyone. Well, Crysania buys it all, poor woman. They get closer and closer and looks like they are about to kiss...

But no kissels. Excited Caramon arrives to bring news that Zhaman has been conquered. Crysania leaves the men alone, and Caramon sings a happy song about how much glory he has gained in these battles and thanks Raistlin for making him the leader of the army, giving his life meaning and saving him from being a useless, depressed drunk.

Raistlin is initially annoyed that his alone time with Crysania was interrupted, but knowledge that he now has access to the gates he so desires to open puts him in a good mood and he joins Caramon in the victory celebrations. At some point it even looks like he... smiles a little... and not sarcastically. Who is this stranger and what have you done with the real Raistlin?

Now all Raistlin needs is to make sure Crysania will follow him to the gates. At night, when they are alone again he begins to sing a romantic song for her, posing sexily while he gazes at the starry sky, and she joins the song. By now she is completely and utterly in love with him and filled with joy when suggested that the feelings might be mutual.

Raistlin does an excellent job at seducing her considering he has no prior experience in romance whatsoever. He often takes Crysania's hand while they walk but never makes any more forward moves himself, allowing her to be the one who initiates their first kiss.

Except this time too they are interrupted before the kiss can happen. This time by peeping tom Takhisis making her nightly visit to Raistlin's mind and being all Oh my, things are getting juicy in here, wait until I get my popcorn! Raistlin is startled, looks away and tells Crysania to get out. This is the first time Raistlin's behaved like that in front of her, so she's frightened that by making that first move crossed his line and angered him. She runs away, brokenhearted.

Raistlin is left alone with Takhisis, who in her turn tries to play mindgames. She suggests to Raistlin that maybe he wasn't encouraging Crysania's love just because it was convenient for his plan, maybe he too is falling in love.

Raistlin is horrified of such a thought but compliments her Dark Majesty for pointing out his weakness so he can make sure to overcome it. I made her fall in love with me, using her weakness of compassion and pity against her, surely I am above falling into my own trap! Well, regardless of how her love was born, comments Takhisis, your feelings are genuine – don't you want to keep her? Love is stronger than you are, puny mortal, it would overcome you.

Love brings no happiness, only suffering, sings Raistlin. Look at Crysania, who was so fearless, yet now is afraid, made so weak by her love. I must not return a false love, not fall for a creation of my own making. And so he fights to resists the basic human urge, the need to be loved, considering it a dangerous weakness. Without love I can't be hurt. I won't let my feelings hinder me, my brother is nothing but a sword for me and Crysania is nothing but a key. Love will break and weaken any ruler.

Nothing matters more than love, whispers Takhisis (rather uncharacteristic for the goddess of evil to spout such sappy fortune cookie aforisms). No, power is much more dear to me, answers Raistlin, but he is a complete emotional mess after fighting his feelings and can just tiredly beg for the Dark Lady to leave him alone.

Caramon, while unable to hear Takhisis, heard everything Raistlin said and his heart breaks when he finally learns that his brother doesn't love him. So it was all lies, I meant nothing to you? Or maybe I knew this all along and was lying to myself. When Caramon says he's leaving, Raistlin calls out to him, weak and exhausted after chasing Takhisis out of his mind. And even now, after hearing the truth, Caramon hesitates only a moment before coming to Raistlin's side, making sure he's alright. He even takes off his cape to cover the sleepy wizard warmly.

Kind people are unable to ignore a call for help, even when uttered by someone they know wouldn't return the favor, because for kind people there is no such thing as ”someone who doesn't deserve help.” I still want to kick Raistlin for being such a dick, though. While watching Raistlin sleep, Caramon sings a sad song about how he misses the lost happiness and innocence of their childhood.

The next song is very painful. It's Crysania basically slutshaming herself. Instead of recognizing that her broken heart is the result of Raistlin's mindfuckery, she blames herself. And more alarmingly, she makes a decision to change. By now she is as desperate for Raistlin recognizing her worth as Caramon was for any sign of brotherly love. It hurts me to see her like this, because it reminds me too much of real women who end up trying to change to better please their male lovers. This is what has become of her – the fearless lady who went forth to save a wicked man and prevent him from going through a horrible plan has turned into a blind minion of said man, willing to do whatever he wants. Raistlin has corrupted Crysania, broken her in an incredibly vile way. Instead of leaving the cruel man, she is finally convinced to aid him in opening the gates to Abyss. In her despair to be deemed worthy, Crysania decides to do the one thing Raistlin has always been asking of her, even if that means going against her god's will. At one point in the song it looks like she's talking to Paladine (kinda looking skyward) and saying something along the lines of ”I expect you to condemn what I'm about to do.” And so she betrayed her god and went down to Abyss for the sake of love.

Into the Abyss they go, singing a triumphant song together. They went with music forth to battle, not knowing what horrors lie beyond the gates. Crysania is made fearless by her faith, but not the faith she had for her god but her faith in Raistlin's might, sincerely believing it to be powerful enough to defeat a great goddess. Raistlin is made fearless by his trust in himself.

Not too long after passing the gates, they are welcomed by her Dark Majesty herself. Takhisis is aware of Raistlin's plan to kill her, but she pretends not to know. She congratulates Raistlin for opening the gates for her like a good little minion and offers him a place at the foot of her throne. Either she is being sarcastic, or she is attempting to avoid the fight with intimidation tactics, allowing Raistlin a peaceful way out if he chickens now that he is actually face to face with a powerful goddess.

Look at those four women standing beside her Dark Majesty. I didn't get it at the first viewing, but look at them; different colours, wearing a crown decorated with dragon horns – they are the rest of her five necks! The iconic fiveheaded dragon queen form does appear in the musical, cleverly interpreted!

Intimidation tactic seems to be working, Raistlin looks hesitant for a while, but Crysania turns his head so he can't see the Dark Lady and instead looks her in the eyes and this seems to break the fear instilled in Raistlin after so many nightmares. Time for mindgames and backstabbing is over, Raistlin steps up and voices his intentions loud and clear, challenging the goddess of evil.

This is the first time we see Takhisis express anger, now that all pretense has been thrown to the wind. You can almost see her breathe fire as she gives the INSOLENT MORTAL I WILL BREAK YOU IN HALF!-speech. She then summons her minions to fight for her. Including some weird glowstick-lightsaber wielding guys. They didn't have the budget to prop actual horrors from beyond, so they got creative. I think Takhisis should have summoned a bunch of her evil dragons. No matter how incredibly powerful your wizard is, if a flock of red dragons appears, he is toast. Delicious magical toast.

In the next song Takhisis sings about how great her powers are, with a big emphasis on the fact that she can take countless forms. One great way they show this is the actress playing Crysania also joining the song as clearly a Crysania-shaped incarnation of the Dark Lady. She has been tormenting Raistlin with nightmares and goes to work with his fears and darker memories again. It is fascinating that Crysania seems to be one of the things he fears, but that is probably because of his fear of falling in love and therefore becoming vulnerable.

You know, seeing Takhisis and Crysania together and hearing their beautiful voices simultaneously, makes me want to ship them. I know it's a ridiculous crackpairing, Crysania would deem it blasphemous and Takhisis would be like ”She's not as good as Mina.” But hey, if Crysania is ready to betray her god, why not go all out and fall in love with her god's literal rival? Like how deliciously angsty would that get? I'm sorry, this is stupid. Actually, no, I'm not sorry. Because you know what, I can't go to any show's fandom without seeing a fuckton of male/male ships of characters who hate each other in canon/are sworn enemies, so I should not have to be ashamed for blushing at the thought of femslashing Crys and Taksu. The ship may be full of holes but I will sail it!

More random minions. The background dancers just really, really wanted to show off their cool fedoras and scarves, no matter how unfit they are in a fantasy setting.

The next foe Raistlin faces is a succubus. She unfortunately lacks the charisma of Vera Zoodena and comes off as trying too much. I'm sorry, but whatever she's trying, it just doesn't work. Raistlin seems nervous though, and shouts to her ”Don't touch me!” Oh, the bookworm nerd doesn't like me, eh, says the succubus, I'll just pick his brother then. And she goes to snuggle with Caramon's doppelganger. This is a rather interesting scene, because there's a book that tells about the twins' childhood and apparently there was an incident where a girl initially showed intered towards little Raistlin and got his hopes up and then crushed them by deciding to go for the handsome twin instead. So, yeah, Raistlin has brother issues, and of course Takhisis uses them against him.

Time for more childhood trauma. Takhisis summons the images of the kids who bullied Raistlin when he was little. As someone who still occasionally has nightmares of my own bullies, I have to admit I feel sorry for him here. The cruelty of children can wound a person very deeply. The creatures make Raistlin retreat, tearing open wounds he thought had scarred permanently long ago. Anxious and unable to fight his fears, Raistlin falls on his knees and, much like in his childhood, instinctively cries Caramon for help. But his brother is not here to protect him, to chase away the bullies and watch over his sleep so he can wake him up from nightmares.

Now that Takhisis has Raistlin exhausted and crawling on the ground, she appears to him in the disguise of his mother. She calls for Raistlin, and the wizard reacts to the familiar voice, rushing towards her but stopping midway when he finally gets a grip of reality, that these are all shadows summoned by Takhisis and nothing more. Once Takhisis realizes her game is discovered, she drops the pretense and appears as herself, casting her dark spells on Raistlin, pulling him closer. Eventually all of his strength is consumed and he collapses, fallen victim to the Dark Lady's power.

Crysania to the rescue! Having been separated from Raistlin in the darkness of the Abyss, she finally finds him and immediately puts her healing powers to work. Takhisis tells her she is too late, death has claimed the wizard. I will not give him to you, Crysania exclaims, continuing to revive the man she loves. If needed, she is willing to give her own life in exchange of his. Takhisis speaks to Crysania, telling her that even she feels sorry for her, but a flame always leaves its mark. And then, just as life is returning Raistlin's body, the Dark Lady blinds Crysania's eyes.

And now we get to the most painful scene in the show. Blinded Crysania seeks Raistlin's hand and tells him that they have defeated darkness (What?! How? When? The last I checked, Takhisis seemed to be alive and well. I don't get it.). My eyes can see light no more and I am wounded, but your path to godhood is open now. And then Raistlin answers... that I don't need you anymore. I... I... fuck... Crysania begs him to stay with her, to hold her hand. She was ready to give her life for you! All she wants is for you to hold her hand! I don't cry often when reading books but I remember sobbing all the way through this horrible ending.

Singing arrogantly, Raistlin leaves Crysania behind, blind and wounded, all alone in the darkness of the Abyss. I did what was necessary to reach my goal. The gates were sealed cleverly but with the help of a fool's love I opened them. I don't need you anymore. The price of love in exchange of becoming a god is not too high.

Takhisis speaks to Crysania again, and it's clear now that when she said earlier that she feels sorry for Crysania, it wasn't because of her grief over Raistlin's death, but because she wasn't aware of being used.

Taksu, please, can you not. (Why is everyone in this musical such a dick to blind people?)

Crysania sings a sad song about the senselessness of cruelty and my heart breaks for her. After devoting her life to a man who abandoned her to die alone in the dark, the inside of her chest is pitch black and a void deeper than Abyss where her heart used to be. A final song of grief echoes among the shadows. The Dark Lady's minions dance with Crysania, surprisingly calmly considering they are creatures of evil. Even Takhisis herself holds her in her arms for a while (please kiss her. I know you're not the goddess of death but please. Just kiss her.). Eventually she collapses at the foot of her Dark Majesty's throne and ends her song. The only thing I can do is close my eyes before this void and wait for someone to push. And that's the image we leave Crysania with. A betrayed, blind woman standing on a cliff's edge, waiting for the moment she has to fall down.

Astinus appears again and tells what happened next. Raistlin went on to challenge all of the gods until he was the only one left. However, he did not possess the gods' ability to create. In his war against the gods he had left the mortal world in ruin, and now as the only god of Krynn, he could not repair it. The mortal world had become as desolate, dark and lifeless as the Abyss.

Now, in the books this is not what happens. It's what could happen, but Raistlin gets shown this grim future and that scares him to finally give up his ambitious plan. However he had already opened the gates and entered Abyss, so he chose to remain there and prevent Takhisis from coming through the gates until they had been properly closed behind him. Some versions of the musical also apparently have this ending. However, I prefer this one, where Raistlin reaches that future and has to for all eternity bear the heavy burden of being the one who brought forward the end of the world, all alone in the darkness, the only remaining witness to the devastating results of his actions. I think an ending where we allow him the chance to correct his errors and sacrifice his life nobly for the sake of preventing Takhisis from entering Krynn, is cheaper and doesn't give proper emphasis on the fact that actions have consequenses and often, even in stories involving time travel, once you've made a mistake, you cannot undo it! I prefer stories with the moral ”Don't do this, once you do it there's no going back” than ”Don't do this but if you do, there's always a second chance if you're ready to make some sacrifices.” I know this is fantasy, but in real life, there often aren't second chances. You can only break a fragile thing once. You can only lose someone's trust once.

We get one final song, Lord of Nothing, and it's a great song number. For whatever reason Takhisis sings it with Raistlin, despite the fact that she should be long since defeated in this timeline. Maybe she will forever live on in Raistlin's mind, a fragment of his imagination formed from the memory of nightmares. I don't know, but I don't even care, Vera Zoodena has such a great voice that she can raise Takhisis from the dead any time she wants.

One reason I love this song is that it's basically the Dark Lady vigorously rubbing salt on Raistlin's wounds. Yeah, you wanted this, you wanted this so bad, well look at your kingdom now, oh great Lord of Nothing! As she sings the background dancers gradually take away all of the props, including Raistlin's staff and his robes and then disappear offstage, leaving him standing there alone on the empty stage. It is very satisfying to hear Raistlin sing in anxious manner, desperately trying to lie to himself that he can still fix this, oh please don't let me be left alone in the void. The last one to leave is Astinus. He gives Raistlin his quill and scroll of history before disappearing.

I liked this show and was amazed how nicely it adapted the original material. It's very different to the kind of musical theater I usually watch (Takarazuka). But even a smaller production, with a very small prop budget and actors who sing well but don't dance at all, can be as entertaining as a big, colourful spectacle.

There's been some translating projects going on. Maybe some day there might be an English version done.

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rantingfangirl · 7 years

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Cross Life Chapter Ten

Summary: Moving across the pond was supposed to signify new beginnings for the Kirkland family. Arthur’s parents seemed to take that a bit too literally for his liking.

Chapter Index

This was moved from my old account

“Arthur? Are you almost finished?” His mother’s voice was muffled as she rapped on the door to the bathroom in three quick successions, the tone of her voice showing that she was growing impatient.

He took a sharp breath as he buttoned up his sleeve, his breeches cutting into his thighs as he twisted. “Yes, in just a second.” Arthur reached for his shoes, wincing at how terribly tight everything was. Sure, the tailor had told him it was supposed to be this way, but in her own words, “It’s only supposed to be a bit snug”.

Arthur felt as if he were about to pop, as if all his insides would come oozing out in a bloody and chunky smoothie.

The tile was freezing cold under his stockings, making him shiver, taking in another sharp breath. The shoes were easy enough to put on, the heel cap short enough that he could slip his feet in. His smallest toes rubbed against the sides, and would most likely cause a pair of nasty blisters, but Arthur figured that would stop once he broke them in.

Arthur made a quick glance in the mirror, cringing at what he saw. He told himself that everyone else was going to be wearing the same thing- or at least something similar- and that this was considered high fashion many centuries ago, but it did little to calm his ever-growing embarrassment.

Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, Arthur twisted the door handle, slowly pushing a small sliver open and sticking his head out.

Along with his family, Vlad and Lukas stood in the living room, tapping their feet with anticipation. They smiled upon seeing him, Vlad pushing himself off the wall and taking a step forward. Lukas look as if he were about to do the same, but stayed where he was. “C’mon out, Arthur. Can’t be that bad.”

Arthur snorted, shaking his head. “And that’s where you thought wrong.”

His mother frowned, tsking. She had been on her very best behavior while his friends were over, which thankfully meant no yelling and no looks of disappointment, but at times like theses, some of her true self slipped through. “Arthur, dear, stop being silly. Come out this instant.”

He huffed, stepping back to pull the door open. Their faces lit up as Arthur stepped out of the bathroom, the fabric between his thighs rubbing together.

His mother put her hand over her mouth, her face reddening. Her eyes became watery, and she quickly wiped the tears away before they could ruin her caked makeup. Arthur had to suppress a groan and an eye roll. If she was like this seeing him in a damn choir uniform, then he dreaded when graduation came around.

If they even went to his graduation, that is, considering their current pesky situation.

“Arthur… you look-”

“You look like an alternative coloring of Lord Farquaad from Shrek.”

“Shut up, Peter.”

He stuck his tongue out at Arthur, kicking his feet against the bottom of the sofa. Vlad chuckled at his actions, most likely being reminded of his own little brother, but was quickly cut off by a glare from Arthur.

Arthur’s mother shook her head, clucking her tongue. “Peter, don’t be rude.” Arthur’s eyes went wide, and if he wasn’t watching, he would’ve choked. It was rare that his mother would scold Peter for anything, even if important people visited, which made it even more surprising.

She walked up to Arthur, tugging down his tunic and picking a piece of lint off his puffy green and white striped sleeve. Straightening his hat- which was probably the only part of the costume that fit correctly- she ruffled up the feathers and took a step back, looking him up and down. And frowned.

Vlad and Lukas snickered as she licked her thumb, setting her hand on Arthur’s shoulder to keep him still. The latter grimaced as she rubbed it across his cheek, erasing whatever trivial spot she found, leaving behind a sticky, slimy trail.

“There. That’s better.” She put her other hand on his free shoulder, shaking him a bit. Her smile was soft, warm, like it used to be when she looked at him, and when she spoke, she whispered, quiet enough that only he could hear. For once, she wasn’t screaming at him from across the house. “Don’t listen to your brother.” She brushed some of his hair away from his face, her fingers soft and gentle. “He’s just jealous at how handsome you look. He wants desperately to be like you.”

Arthur snorted, shaking his head. “I somehow doubt that.” He made sure to be as quiet as she was, if not more so.

Shaking her head, her smile grew as she walked backwards towards Arthur’s father, a few of her teeth showing.

The living room fell silent, everyone staring at Arthur with various amounts of awe on their faces. Everyone expect for Peter, who had left mumbling about how he hoped Arthur would do something- go to hell, most likely- and pouting.

Lukas watched as Peter walked away, navigating around the various pieces of furniture, and running up the stairs, an unreadable expression across the former’s face. He turned his attention to Vlad when he spoke, the latter clapping his hands and rubbing them together. “So~, how does it feel?”

The room seemed to perk up, seemed to lean in at Vlad’s question. His father drummed his fingers against the arm of the armchair, his eyebrow raised. A telltale sign that he was actually interested in what he was listening to. A rare occurrence.

Arthur looked down, wiggling his toes in his shoes. The rough fabric of his stockings clung to his legs, his knees looking awkward and gangly. His sleeves rubbed against his side, causing a slight scratching sound each time he moved his arms. A collar of lace wrapped around his neck, engulfing most of his chin and lower jaw. Arthur would surely get a rash later, as it was rough, rubbing against wherever it touched. The only way he could describe his outfit was-

“Itchy.” Vlad’s eyes narrowed, Lukas’ brow furrowing as he cocked his head to the side. Huffing and rolling his eyes, Arthur cursed that he was being forced to clarify. Who knew the reaction he would get from his mother. “It feels itchy. The fabric does.”

His mother tsked, shaking her head. The unusual kindness that she had displayed not even minutes earlier was gone, eaten up by whatever demon was living inside of her. Arthur knew the only thing holding her anger back was the fact that they had friends over. “What do you mean, dear?” She smiled, batting her eyelashes. Her words were honeyed, hiding the venom. Arthur knew where to find it, though, from years and years of practice.

He shrugged, relishing in the pure annoyance that flashed through her eyes. It was always something amusing to see, despite what usually came after it. “I dunno. It just doesn’t… feel right.”

“Do you not like it?” There she was. Her true self was budding its head, slithering out of its disguise, regardless of who was with her. Vlad and Lukas sent quick, discreet glances laced with questions in her direction, their eyes narrowing. She was starting not to care, consequences be damned.

“I-”

“I’m sure he’ll get used to it. Eventually.” It was the first time Lukas had spoken since Arthur went into the bathroom. He had a small, serene smile on his face, similar to the others he had been sporting these past couple of weeks.

His mother whipped her head to him, her eyes cold, calculating. Planning. She reminded him of a green snake, observing- measuring and sizing up- her prey.

He only hoped that Lukas- and Vlad, too- would be smart enough to get out while they still could.

She nodded, her smile growing even sweeter. Taking a step back, his mother put her entire, unrelenting focus on Lukas. “Yes… I’m sure he will. Eventually.” She put extra emphasis on the last word, mocking him. Not that he would be able to tell, considering the fact that his mother’s had years of perfecting of perfecting her craft. What’s more, she learned from the very best: Arthur’s grandmother, the Wicked Witch of England.

Her heels clicked against the hardwood floor as she turned to Arthur, cocking her head to the side and folding her hands over her stomach. Arthur tensed his jaw, pursing his lips into a fine line bracing himself for the full brunt of whatever she was planning. “You’ll get used to the itchiness, won’t you, Arthur?”

This was a test, he knew it was. She was trying to see how he would react in front of his peers, in front of his friends. Whether he would stay calm when faced with her typical methods or resort to one of his “temper tantrums”. Of course, this was only the first part, and would be followed by many more, but Arthur had learned to spot these kinds of things from the moment the words come flooding from her mouth. She had been doing things like this since he was a kid, after all.

He smiled, giving her a simple nod. When he spoke, he made sure his words were kind, sweet, reassuring. The doting son to go along with the ever concerned mother. “Of course, I will. I’ll just have to wear it a few times, break it in.”

The two shared a look. One that, if it weren’t for Vlad and Lukas patiently standing next to them, smiling in a washed down version of the typical American fashion, would’ve become a long and grueling battle of wills. With a huff, his mother broke eye contact, Arthur relishing in the fact that he had won. For now.

Shaking her head and tsking, something that she had been doing many times these past months, she turned to face Arthur’s father. His nose was stuffed in a thick paperback, his fingers having slowed down to a soft tap, in rhythm with his foot. Her dress- calf length and floral, a pattern that seemed to be a staple for Kirkland family women- swished as she made a swift turn, wrapping around her leg. As she approached him, she tried to discreetly fix it, but failed miserably, glaring at Arthur and Vlad as they snickered.

“John?” His father answered with only a small nod and a huff. His mother had always found his non-verbal replies irritating, and had complained about it many times through Arthur’s life, and, once again not finding what she received satisfactory, tsked and snapped her fingers in his face. “John.”

Groaning, he leaned back in the chair, deadpanning. He closed his book with a snap, not before setting a flimsy receipt in the crease of his current page. Brushing strands of his thick red hair out of his face, he raised an eyebrow, his deep voice grumbling as he spoke. “What, dear?”

She crossed her arms, frowning. “Have you noticed your son’s new outfit?”

“I have.”

“And?”

“And what do you think of it?”

Watching the two speak to each other, Arthur felt as if he were in a period drama, his parents a pair of templates copied straight from a Pride and Prejudice-style trope. He glanced over to Lukas and Vlad, giving the two an apologetic smile when he found them looking back. Arthur earned a reassuring grin and a nod in return.

He straightened up as his father turned his head to him, looking Arthur up and down. The latter tapped his foot, staring at the ceiling, his shoulders tense. He would gladly take Peter’s non-stop whining over this, or perhaps a weekend trip alone with his mother. It had always made him uneasy when he had his father’s unrelenting attention, that critical eye sweeping over him. It was uncomfortable, made him want to swiftly walk away and lock himself in his room or apologize, even if he did nothing wrong.

It made him remember, made him angry.

Opening his book again and situating himself in his chair, his father huffed, pushing his reading glasses up his nose. “It’s nice, I guess.” He crossed his legs, resuming his reading.

Rolling her eyes, his mother put her hands on her hips, cocking the latter to the side. She tapped her foot, her heel clacking against the hardwood flooring. Out of the corner of his eye, Arthur could see Lukas put a hand to his temple, rubbing it slowly. A pet-peeve, then.

“You guess? You guess it’s nice.”

“What else do you want me to say?”

Arthur took his chance and quickly stepped over to his friends, standing in the middle of them. “If they start yelling, we dart to my room,” he whispered. The chance was rather slim, but he had to have them be ready should it happen.

Vlad glanced at them, then at Arthur, then back at them. He put his hand on Arthur’s shoulder, leaning in to whisper with enough volume that Lukas would be able to hear as well. “Are they always like this?” He sounded… cautious. Wary. As if he were actually concerned for Arthur and his family.

Lukas cleared his throat before Arthur could answer, grabbing the latter’s arm and wrapping his hands around it. He leaned back, his voice even softer than Vlad’s. “When she looked at me, I saw my life start to flash before my eyes. It was terrifying.”

Arthur nodded, feeling a bucket of sympathy for his friend. “She sometimes has that effect, believe me.” Not entirely true for him, but it was different for others.

Vlad cleared his throat, and Arthur remembered the former’s question. He didn’t- no, couldn’t give the real answer, if only to reveal his family life and have to explain all the shallow ups and deep downs that came with it. And that might lead to having to explain why exactly they had chosen to move to America and what followed, something that he desperately wanted to avoid. So, he lied. “No, it doesn’t happen often. It’s rare, actually. Don’t worry, it usually boils down quickly, we’ve nothing to worry about.”

Vlad nodded, his eyes narrowed. Arthur’s reassurance didn’t seem to help ease his nerves at all, but he didn’t say anything else. Lukas’ grip around his arm tightened, his fingers surely leaving a mark.

“I don’t know, one would think that since we spent four hundred dollars on that damn costume-”

“I didn’t spend four hundred dollars. You did.”

Lukas froze, looking up at Arthur with wonder and surprise. “This thing cost four hundred?” He tugged Arthur’s sleeve, running his thumb along the bumpy fabric. He scrunched up his nose. “That could buy me a really good violin case.”

Vlad snorted. “That could get me a shelf’s worth of books.” The other two nodded at Vlad’s statement, rows and rows of special edition books flooding his mind.

He would have rather bought that, or at least some nice stationary and merchandise for various books he had read, instead of this scratchy heap of cloth. At least then he would actually use it for more than a year, whereas the fate of this costume was unknown the second the last note was sung of the final Madrigal concert.

The three watched as Arthur’s parents bickered, providing commentary when they felt like they needed it. From how tense she was, Arthur could tell that his mother was a few minutes from blowing her top off, and knew that his father wouldn’t be far behind once she started yelling.

He had to admit to himself that it was rather embarrassing for his friends to see such a side of his family, but was shut down when he tried to apologize for it. A normal family issue, they had called it as they started making bets on who would win. Although he thought it mental at first, Arthur quickly joined them, all the while quickly conjuring up a layout of the house, should they need to escape.

He had to admit, though, that his betting was a bit watered down, sullied by his exhaustion of dealing with their fights year after year. Arthur pretended to be enthusiastic, to overestimate his parents’ wrath, and thankfully they believed him. “My mum, definitely. She’s a force that can’t be stopped.”

Vlad leaned in front of Arthur, nodding his head in agreement to Lukas. “Definitely his dad.” He pursed his lips into a fine line, furrowing his brow. He stayed like that for a few seconds, before perking up and puffing up his chest, saying in a voice that even a wrestling announcer would seethe in jealously of, “The unstoppable force versus the immovable object.”

Arthur tipped his head back and cackled, not entirely caring about how loud he was or if his parents saw. Lukas giggled, covering his mouth with his free hand, his cheeks growing red.\

Confident with what turned out to be a successful bit at comedy, Vlad grinned, a little bit of teeth showing, huffing through his nose. He muttered something under his breath, so quiet that even though he was practically on top of Arthur, he could barely make out a single word. Arthur was sure it had something to do with “earning proper appreciation”, but he couldn’t be entirely sure.

The laughter died down, Lukas removing his hand from his mouth. “Oh god, I just can’t believe the way ya said that-”

“Boys?”

They looked up to see Arthur’s mother standing in front of them, her shoulders tense and chin high. Her face was a rosy pink, yet her eyes weren’t watery, so she was likely more furious than anything else. Arthur sincerely hoped that everything went smoothly and without a hitch for the rest of the evening, since he wanted to avoid one of her “venting session”, as she called it, as much as possible. And, by extension, a nasty headache.

Lukas released Arthur’s arm as soon as her eyes went to it, taking a step forward. “Is there anythin’ wrong, Mrs. Kirkland?” Arthur had to suppress a snort, rolling his eyes at the sweetness in Lukas’ words. He was sucking up to her after their previous interaction, it was obvious, but Arthur felt sorry for Lukas. If only because he had yet to learn that his mother would take names and smuggle grudges down to the bottom of her grave. And the fact that they didn’t know that they had wronged her, if only by association with Arthur.

Many, many times in the past, she had openly disagreed and mocked Arthur’s choices for friendship in his face and in front of his brothers, and while he hoped it would be different for Vlad and Lukas, it didn’t seem to be the case. She always found something wrong, whether it be taste in music and literature or something as trivial as they way they laughed. It never failed, she always hated every single one of his friends, unless, of course, it was someone she had arranged for him to meet with, and did any and everything she could to try and drive them away.

Sometimes, she had even succeeded in her mission. And while Arthur knew that if Vlad and Lukas didn’t want to associate with him anymore due to his psychopath of a mother, he would let them go and find someone else , but that didn’t mean that he wanted to.

Besides, he was too deep into the plan to have to suddenly find another set of allies.

When she smiled, it was a sweet, sarcastic little thing, one of her trademarks, and when she spoke, her words were filled with thinly veiled disgust and hate. “Oh, Lukas, don’t you worry your little self about it. It’s fine.”

Taking a few steps back, she took in a deep breath, her shoulders rising as she did so. If Vlad and Lukas weren’t there, Arthur would have no worries about saying that that was most likely why she was removed from the church choir back home. Of course, he had to think about them now, and the consequences of his mouth around them, so he would unfortunately have to save his witty comment for a later date.

She looked back and forth between the three of them, ignoring Arthur’s father as he abandoned his book on the coffee table and left the room, making his way towards the kitchen. Arthur would’ve thought that she had not noticed his departure, were it not for the footsteps thumping across the hardwood. They were loud enough that even the most distracted person in the world would snap up in a tizzy from whatever they were doing.

Just as she had done previously, his mother folded her hands across her stomach, and spoke, ever the queen addressing her court of rather questionable teenagers. “So, Arthur, I must say that you look simply dashing in that outfit of yours. You’ve always looked good in green.” He nodded once at her compliment, smiling only to keep her anger at bay. “I would like you to continue wearing it throughout the evening, you know, so you can get used to it. Eventually.”

Her smile grew at the last part, and she quickly glanced at Lukas, measuring his reaction to her mocking. The latter frowned, his cheeks turning red, but didn’t say anything. Smart.

Arthur nodded his head again, his smile growing smaller. He clenched his fist, not before hiding it behind the folds of his trousers. “Sure.”

She huffed, slightly shaking her head. A dismissal. “Vladimir and Lukas.” The former perked up, cocking his head to the side and giving her a smile with his teeth on full display. The latter slumped his shoulders, his face falling. “You two are staying over for the night, yes?”

Lukas let Vlad speak, the former crossing his arms. “Yes ma’am. If ya don’t mind, of course.”

“Not at all. And you’ve notified your parents?” It was subtle, but Arthur knew she was referring back to the night of Lukas’ date, when he hadn’t felt it necessary to inform her he was not coming home that evening. Not that his friends would know about that, but in his mother’s world, everyone was at fault.

While Lukas only nodded, and a bit timidly at that, Vlad’s smile grew wider, the skin around his eyes scrunching. “Yes ma’am, you’ve got nothin’ to worry about.’

“Fantastic. I’ll go and make sure that we make enough food.” And with that, she was off, clicking down the hallway and towards the kitchen, the fabric of her dress fluttering behind her.

Arthur cringed, pulling at his stockings, goosebumps rolling up his arms as it let it go. His friends remained silent, Lukas breathing in as the mood of the living room began to grow lighter and lighter.

“Arthur.” Vlad’s smile faded, falling into a frown, his posture slumping.

He deadpanned. “Yes”

“I hope ya don’t get offended with me saying this, but yer mother’s bat-shit crazy.”

Lukas snorted. “Crazier than that.”

He supposed that since they were bluntly and openly insulting his own mother, he should feel offended and somewhat angry about it, but Arthur couldn’t help but agree more.

Over his many, many years in the Kirkland family, Arthur had quickly learned that while his mother valued her reputation, she cared about her curiosities and uncalled-for theories more. It was one of the few things that matched between the two of them, though this particular trait usually did the former more damage than anything good.

Arthur took a sip from his glass, his teeth scraping against the glass. He swirled his water around as if it were fine wine, chunks of solid ice crinkling around. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see his father’s grip tighten around the handle of his fork, but payed no mind to it, sentencing him to deal with it. The noise wasn’t even that loud, but his father had a twig up his ass at best, and found anything that Arthur or his brothers did to be mildly annoying.

“Mrs. Kirkland, this casserole is wonderful.” Vlad took another bite, smiling as he chewed. He circled his fork above his plate, waiting until he swallowed to swoop in for another mouthful. A bit of rice fell onto his shirt, but he picked it off quickly, discreetly glancing around to see if anyone noticed.

His mother smiled, setting her silverware down to fold her hands onto her lap. She cocked her head to the side, nodding in thanks and appreciation, Arthur already knowing what she was going to say before she even opened her mouth. “Thank you, Vladimir. It was a recipe my grandmother taught me when I was around Peter’s age.” She motioned to her youngest son sitting across from Vlad with a swift wave of her hand. “I always try to make it when we have a few guests stay over for dinner, to see what they think of it.”

Peter snorted, covering his mouth, fork still in hand, when their father sent a look in his direction. Their mother’s smile didn’t deflate a single bit, as she didn’t even give any indication that she noticed Peter, staring at Vlad with the utmost intensity.

The latter’s, however, faltered just a tiny bit, boosting up back at full force as he nodded. “Oh, really?” He took in a deep breath, letting it out through his mouth, his chest shaking as he did so. “Well, that’s always nice, I guess. Trying to keep the tradition up and runnin’.”

Arthur considered revealing the truth to the table, that she had actually ripped the recipe off the Internet a few years ago and claimed it her own for a sense of self-importance, but decided against it. If only to spare himself from the storm that would brew up only seconds afterward.

His mother nodded, perking up, and thanked Vlad. As what usually happened when such an occurrence came up, her smile turned smug, and she glanced at the ceiling, basking in her new-found attention. Arthur hoped it wouldn’t be too bad, and would be- unfortunately for him- about Peter, but such luck never seemed to be with him these days.

“You know, I have a funny story involving this casserole and Arthur.” She looked at him, her face loving and kind, though if you looked close enough, you could see that it didn’t reach her eyes.

Arthur could feel the color leech from his face, and he clenched his fists under the table, careful not to let anyone else see. She was going back to that one. He had asked her multiple times to stop telling the story, especially in front of people that he liked, but here she was, about to spill it out all over again.

He took a deep breath, cocking his head to the side, his smile tense and back stiff. “Mum, I don’t think that this is a good-”

She shook her head, lips pursed into a fine line. And right at that moment, Arthur realized that this was the beginning of the second part of her test. The vile woman. How cruel of her, to reveal the more angrier moments of his past into the light when he had purposefully and skillfully covered them these past couple of months. “Arthur, it’s not too bad. It was years ago, and it goes perfectly with out dinner pallet.”

He glared at her with what he hoped to be enough hate to make a small child cry. She stayed the same, persistent, didn’t do anything to show that she was affected by it.

Lukas looked back and forth between the two, sitting at Arthur’s right and his mother’s left from the head of the table. Before, when everyone was sitting at their various spots, the former balked when the only remaining seat was right next to her, and had mostly kept silent throughout the dinner. Until now, apparently, when he d3decided to make their current situation that much worse. “Er, if you don’t mind, Mrs. Kirkland, I would like to hear yer story.”

Arthur suppressed a groan, sending a deadpan expression in his friend’s direction. The fool had no idea what he had cause just by saying those handful of words, and he probably wouldn’t get it until it was too late. “Too late” being the second after she finished humiliating Arthur.

His mother perked up, clapping her hands then lacing her fingers together. Peter scooted his chair forward, leaning in and setting his elbows on the table, already knowing what she was going to say as much as Arthur did. The thing was, the former enjoyed it- still getting a degree of amusement out of it, even after hearing it so many times- and regularly asked for it to be repeated, unlike the latter.

Tapping her fingers against the wooden dining room table, her stylishly manicured nails making an irritating clicking sound, her words were slow and emphasized as she spoke, pouring a bag of salt into the wound she was viciously ripping open. “Well, it was around the time when Arthur was in- what you you Americans call it? Year… Freshman year. Yeah.”

Arthur tipped his head back and groaned, knowing that once she started, there was no way he could effectively get her to stop.

She frowned at him, lightly clucking her tongue, before dismissing him with a wave of her hand. “Anyways, at that time, Arthur’s older brothers were still at home. All four of them are currently in uni back home in England, but that’s besides the point.” She picked up her fork, pushing the almost untouched food around her plate, Arthur wincing at the scrapes and scratches as she spoke. “Arthur has never really gotten along with his brother Dylan-”

“They practically hate each other!”

“Yes, thank you, Peter. Anyway, they were getting into a nasty argument one evening, over something that was so trivial that I don’t even remember what it was, and a few moments prior I had just taken this casserole out of the oven and had set it on the table.”

Arthur closed his eyes, breathing in deeply. The moment of truth, the time when the gates that were his mother’s mouth would open and out would come the things that would mercilessly smear the reputation that he had so carefully and painstakingly built up with his friends.

Not because he was ashamed of it, of course. He looked back at his past, his hard-earned and bravely faced accomplishments with pride. He praised them each time a memory popped into his mind, reliving each moment detail by detail, remembering the smells and the sounds, noting what he could’ve done better and smiling at the highlights. Each of his “outbursts” were wonderful, beautiful. They were his to cherish and his alone.

However, in front of his friends, with the way they considered and thought of him, this story would do damage. A lot of damage that he couldn’t take. Which was something that he could surely- and preferably- go without.

Of course, she didn’t see it that way, nor did Peter, the little fool, for that matter, as she continued the second Vlad and Lukas nodded, giving her their full, undivided attention. Arthur considered telling them that it was nothing they wanted to hear, and it was an old story with no significance anymore, but figured that that would only peak their curiosity. He leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms and huffing, watching as his mother ruined everything he had so far worked for this school-year.

“By then, they had turned almost violent, and their yells could be heard from the kitchen. Since I new no one else was going to do it-” She sent a quick glare towards Arthur’s father, who was eating and didn’t pay her any mind. She frowned. “I made my way to the dining room to stop them, and right as I walked in, Arthur grabbed the back of Dylan’s neck, or maybe it was his head, and dunked him face-first into the casserole.”

Arthur sunk into his chair as the room fell silent, dropping his fork to rub his temples. He waited for the looks that he often got after she got to the climax of the story, the ones filled with disgust and disappointment and shock. The ones that would grow worse and worse and she began to tell even more, going into an analysis of Arthur’s life in England. The ones that were prior to the averted eyes, stuttering, and general awkwardness. The ones that led to those “friends” of his quickly fading out of his life, gone faster than they came.

He had to say, it was nice knowing Lukas and Vlad while they had their short run together.

Her smile grew into a cocky little thing as she leaned back in her chair, taking a sip of her beverage. When she noticed Arthur was staring at her, his mouth etched into a sneer and his brow furrowed, she shook her head, lightly tsking.

His fingernails formed dents in his hands as multiple vulgar insults passed through his mind, most- no, all of them not something you would want to say in front of your mother. Arthur supposed that they would be worse, considering he wanted to say them to her. But with what she had just done, cussing her out like he oh-so desperately wanted to do probably wasn’t the best thing, and would do more bad and good.

But it would feel so, so good while he did it.

What had to be even more surprising than the events of this evening was when Lukas- Lukas, of all people- broke out into a howl, his shoulders and stomach shaking. He cupped his head between his hands, his fingers messing up the hair that covered the side of his face as they rubbed up and down.

Vlad quickly followed, covering his mouth as bits of water spilled out. He shook his head vigorously, lightly tapping his free hand against the table, his laughter muffled. He swallowed his water, not without struggle, and joined Lukas in his shrieking.

A soft tint of cherry red spread across their faces, Lukas wiped a tear from the corner of his eye, and then the other. It was shocking, Arthur seeing the exact opposite of the reaction he had anticipated, had figured would happen. He couldn’t help but grin, then break into a full-blown smile, teeth and all, berating himself for thinking them to be like all the others.

His mother looked more taken back than Arthur felt, her eyes wide and smile faltering. Slowly setting down her glass, she straightened her back, taking in a deep breath, and cocked her head to the side. She watched the two laugh, and eventually Arthur when he joined them, her jaw tense and her eyes cold and hard. Her plan, her method that had been tried-and-true more times than Arthur could count, had backfired at its most basic level.

It was amusing to think about it, really. To see her so angry about her failure to continue ruining his life. Arthur could only compare it to a toddler who didn’t get the toy after causing a tantrum in the store, which only made her seem so much more pathetic.

Vlad’s laughter died down just enough to where he could get a coherent sentence out. It took a few tries, however, as every time he got out a string of words, he burst into another fit. Eventually, he spit out his sentence, literally, his words bunched together. If Arthur hadn’t been listening so intently, he’s sure he would’ve missed it. “And then what happened next?”

Lukas nodded his head, smiling and giggling with enthusiasm. The two leaned in, Vlad propping his head on the palm of his hand, drumming the fingers of his free hand against the table with impatience.

Arthur rolled his shoulders back, smirking, feeling smug. He glanced up at the ceiling, just as his mother had done earlier, studying the wrinkles and creases that covered it as he uncovered the memory. Tapping his finger against his chin, making sure to go agonizingly slow, Arthur took his time as he told the rest of the story. “Well, Dylan’s face was covered, and he was screaming bloody murder. The neighbors even came over later, thought that we were being abused or something like that.” He chuckled, a quick glance to his mother showing her rolling her eyes and shaking her head, muttering something under her breath. She frowned when he snorted. “And, since the casserole had been tainted with Dylan’s disgusting face, it’s not like anyone was going to eat it.”

The two nodded, grinning as they listened. Peter was laughing breathlessly in his seat, and shook his head as he reached for one of the large serving platters that lined the middle of the table. His arm shook as he carried it over, and though Arthur’s father put down his fork for once to try and help him, Peter waved him off, making a whiny comment about how he could do it himself. He received only a huff and a shake of the head as a reply.

Arthur watched their exchange, suppressing a snort at his little brother’s antics. He snapped out of it, rolling his neck back, before continuing. “Of course, he was livid, though he’s hotheaded to begin with so that didn’t really make much difference. Anyway, he grabbed the dish, which had his face printed into it, and threw it at me.” He made a throwing motion with his arm, reenacting it, his fingers tensed and curled.

Their eyes widened, mouths gaping. Lukas shook his head, taking in a sharp breath, giving Arthur a concerned look. “Did it hit you?”

Arthur’s smirk grew, and he chuckled, scratching the back of his neck. He remembered his other brothers cackling as they watched, cheering them on and placing bets n when their “fight” would turn even more physical. And even though his mother pinpointed that moment as one of the “starts of all their problems in the poor Kirkland family”, it made Arthur feel good. It made him feel like he had finally done something right. To him, at least. “No, it didn’t. I ducked just in time for it to fly over my head. It hit the wall and smashed into pieces, though.”

His mother snorted, scooping helpings of food onto her plate and Lukas’. The latter sent wary glances in her direction as she did so, but still paid attention to Arthur. “And I’m sure you boys could guess who got the honor of cleaning that up.” She scowled at that, her mood souring.

Peter frowned, looking up from his plate and to his mother. “But mum, if I remember correctly, you left the room yelling about how you were done with us and Allistor was the one who had to clean-”

“Quiet, Peter.”

Vlad chucked, but returned to his food upon receiving a glare from her. Arthur snickered at that, shaking his head at his friend.

Lukas straightened his back against the dining chair, grinning as he turned to Arthur. “Please don’t tell me that that’s the only store ya got like that.”

He opened his mouth to speak, to suggest that they move on and focus on a different, less suspension-riddled topic, but his mother cut him off before he could get a single word out. “Actually, that was one of the more mild ones.”

Lukas and Vlad’s eyes widened and their brows shot up as Arthur glared at her. Compared to some other ones, the dreaded casserole story was like Arthur giving a lolli to a baby. Of course, they never needed to know the worst of the bunch, and never would, if Arthur had anything to do with it, but that would mean keeping his mother in check. Something that he had never been able to do.

Vlad took a quick sip from his glass. “Really?”

Her smug smirk was back, and with the attention of the table being returned to her, she rolled her shoulders back, giving sparing looks at each person seated. “Indeed. Arthur’s good behavior and tasteful clothing has only been… recent.” She put extra emphasis and nodded once at the last word, raising her glass and circling it. “In the past, calling him unpleasant was possibly the largest understatement you could think of.”

Arthur deadpanned, holding back a cruel insult. How dare that woman insult him while, at the very same time, congratulating herself for her “accomplishments” of “taming” him? It was distasteful, and while he knew this was her he was talking about, Arthur expected even a little better.

Lukas turned his focus to Arthur, looking him up and down with an inquisitive eye. “Well, I’ve noticed those two little holes under his lip-”

“Oh. Those were piercings. He forged my signature and got them without permission. Among other things, of course.”

Arthur let out a huff as Lukas’- along with Vlad’s, for that matter- eyes grew even wider, sinking into his chair. At the time, he thought his actions completely justified, and he still did. His mother had been vehemently against it, complaining about how it would lead him into trouble later on, but had no problem with letting his brother take money out of the swear jar for his cigarette addiction. Let them pay for the lung cancer and see how they liked it.

Vlad looked impressed, pursing his lips and nodding. “That type of piercing, what’s it called?”

“Snake bites.”

Another nod.

Sensing the conversation turning into a directions he found undesirable, his mother cleared her throat, rolling his stiff shoulders back and holding her chin up. “They were awful. Every time you looked at him, your eyes went straight to them. My friends would comment to me about them all the time and-”

He rolled his eyes as she went on and on, talking about how much of an embarrassment he was to her in her various social groups. Arthur took a sharp breath, letting it out harsher than he intended to, earning a glare from his father. A warming.

As if he would ever take it.

Vlad and Lukas listened along as she announced her woes, her frustrations of having a son who turned out oh-so wrong when she had only a mountain level of high expectations. Who “only had to follow his brothers’ examples, get into playing football, having good grades, and then just easily succeed like that”, but had to end up the way he was. Who would give her a near heart attack every time she saw the school’s number calling her cell phone. The son who was the bad crop of the bunch, and how she “figured that with six sons, at least one of them had to turn out bad”, which happened to be him, of all of them.

Arthur stayed silent throughout her rant, his blood boiling. Multiple violent outcomes of this situation swimming through his mind. Not a single one of them ended well for him. Whether it was prompting an outburst from his mother, going off on her and ruining the progress he’d made with his friendships, or having a later screaming match after they left. None of them were desirable, none of them made him erupt with excitement.

As she went on, his friends’ faces went from curious to angered to offended. From what Arthur could tell, really. Vlad’s brow was furrowed, his shoulders stiff and mouth gaped. Lukas’ lips were pursed, his eyes cold and hard. It surprised Arthur, to see them this angry for him, and it felt nice. Amazing. This had never happened before, never, with most agreeing with his mother. He had gotten used to it happening.

But this. This was so much better.

Vlad shook his head vigorously, throwing away most of his impeccable manners in favor of cutting Arthur’s mother off. “Excuse me, ma’am, but that isn’t how I see Arthur at all. From the time I’ve known him, he’s been nothin’ but kind and respectful.”

Lukas leaned against the table and looked over Arthur, nodding at Vlad. He then turned to her, shaking his head, mouth forming into a subtle sneer. “And if that’s how you view your own son, if that’s what you really think of him, then you need to stop looking at him as the problem and turn the mirror onto yourself.”

Arthur sunk even further in his chair, his shoulders raised to the level of his chin. He looked tot he end of the table, measuring the reactions of Peter and his father. The former had frozen completely, staring at his plate, eyes wide and jaw dropped to the floor. He slowly raised his head, looking between Lukas and Vlad with awe, wonder, and just a bit of horror. The latter, however, being his usual self, kept eating, staying out of the conflict as he always tried to do.

What Arthur feared most was the reaction of his mother. She might not yell at his friends- no, she would never do that and risk her reputation, even if it was nonexistent in the states, but that didn’t mean that Arthur himself would be saved after they left. He was definitely going to be on the receiving end of a tongue thrashing tomorrow evening, or maybe the minute- the very second- the front door shut and they were out of the driveway, but the real situation was in the present.

Her jaw tensed, so much that he thought it would snap, and she smiled, one that dripped with hatred and frost and fire. One that told him that while she might let them into the house again after tonight, she would not do it without an argument, and would shun them from the moment their left feet stepped onto the hardwood of the entry hall.

She grabbed her glass, her fingers wrapping around it and gripping the ridges hard enough that her knuckles began to turn white. For a moment, Arthur thought she would throw it, and prepared to duck should it happen to come in his direction.

She looked straight at Lukas, her smile turning into more of a sneer. “That’s what you two think. So you just wait. I know my son, so you just wait, and once one thing goes wrong, once you slip up in even the tiniest way, then you’ll really know what your ‘kind and respectful’ friend is like.”

When she finished, the room fell silent, tensing. She gave each person at the table a look over, and when it was Arthur’s turn to be inspected, he could feel her already searing gaze grow hotter, and he felt relieved but sympathetic when it moved on to Vlad.

In one of her very own temper tantrums, one that could rival Arthur’s worse, she stood, the wood of her chair scrapping against the floor. She grabbed the folded cloth napkin that had sat on her lap, throwing it onto the table with an angered grunt. It flapped against her plate, which still had food piled up on it. He cringed, knowing that it would stain

“I am done with all of you.” She spat out each word, her chest jumping up and down as she heavily breathed. “All of you!”

Her heels clicked as she stomped out of the dining room, cursing and ranting to herself, though Arthur would be lying if he said he didn’t hear every single word. He was, along with everyone else in the dining room, frozen in place and silent, listening to the heavy thumps from the stairs to the second floor, and then the eventual slam of a bedroom door.

He didn’t move, didn’t think at all, just replaying the past ten minutes over and over and over again. Arthur should have expected it, should have seen the rapidly blinking signs, should have stopped it when he could. But no, he had to let it happen, had to sit there like a damned fool as a known active volcano blew her top, spewing her lava on anyone in a limited radius. Idiot. He was an idiot.

Picking up his glass, Peter took a sip from his drink, making sure the noise could be heard throughout the room. When he finished, he pulled his lips away just a tiny bit, his voice deeper than it usually was. “Well, that was awkward.”

Arthur’s father grunted in agreement, before continuing to eat.

The three quietly filed into Arthur’s room, Vlad and Lukas going to sit on the edge of his bed as he shut the door.

Following his mother’s rather embarrassing episode, Arthur figured it best to get them out of the dining room. Ushering them out of the dining room, he left his father and Peter to clean up the dishes- ignoring their whining and protests- and made a beeline towards his bedroom. Sure, they were closer to her, but they were behind a close door. One that locked without any trouble, and had a connection bathroom. Arthur was also confident that at least one of them had snacks in their bag, and he had an electric kettle sitting on his desk along with a full box of tea, so they were set.

As the lock clicked in place, he left to join his friends, tossing his shoes into the corner, his bed groaning as he sat. Arthur stared at his toes, wiggling them in his stockings and tapping them together. From the corner of his eye, he could see his friends fidget and twiddle their thumbs, but didn’t say anything, and neither did they.

They sat there for a few minutes, the entire house silent. Waiting. When someone finally spoke, all three of them did it at the same time, their words bundled and rushed.

“I apologize for the behavior of my family tonight.”

“Oh, hell, I did somethin’ really stupid, didn’t I?”

“Arthur, I think yer mom’s gonna murder me in my sleep.”

They froze, looking back and forth between each other. Arthur deflated, hanging his head and shaking it side to side. What a disaster.

Vlad tipped his head back and laughed, flopping down on Arthur’s bed. He folded his arms under his head, his shirt rising to reveal a slip of soft stomach. “My lord. Did ya hear how she said that last part. It was like she was a witch and was gonna curse us.”

Lukas snorted. “Did y’all see the way she looked at me when I told her to turn the mirror on herself?”

“This was one of her good days,” Arthur added. Not entirely true, but at the moment, he was pissed off and wanted to blame her for his terrible mood. Making her seem like a bad guy was a good way to do it, he figured.

Vlad winced, taking in a sharp breath. “I feel sorry for ya, Art.” He moved his arms to pat his stomach, smacking it in a random rhythm. “I really do.”

He shook his head, cringing. That was one of the last things he wanted to hear. “Don’t be. She’s been this way for years and she’ll never stop. I’m just surprised she did it in front of you two, since she usually values herself more than humiliating me.”

Lukas shook his head, muttering something under his breath. It sounded like he was saying, “That isn’t right at all,” but Arthur couldn’t be entirely sure. And if he did say that, then he would have to agree, even though nothing about his family had ever been right.

Groaning, Arthur pushed against his knees, stretching his arms after he stood. The carpet was soft under his feet as he turned, folding his arms behind his back as he faced Vlad and Lukas. They looked up at him, expressions neutral and just a bit defeated, as if his mother had sucked all the life and energy out of them. Since they’d not yet gained their immunity to her, she probably had.

“So~.” Arthur clapped his hands together, locking his fingers and squeezing. Vlad watched as he did so, patting and rubbing his knees, a frown on his face. Lukas had his eyes closed, taking in deep breaths. “Are you guys still planning on staying over. If you don’t want to, that’s-”

Vlad shook his head, waving him off. Arthur had no idea what exactly he was dismissing, him staying over or the thought that he wouldn’t want to, but Arthur waited for him to clarify, cocking his head to the side and furrowing his brow.

“Yes?”

Vlad sighed, slumping. He chuckled, his smile returning, which was a relief. “Arthur. I’m not gonna ditch ya cause yer mother’s a psychopath.” Arthur’s eyes shot up, a smirk forming as Vlad perked up, waving his hands back and forth like his life depended on it. “I mean no offense, of course.”

Lukas snorted, crossing his arms. “Of course, ya don’t.” The two shared a look, one that Arthur didn’t bother to figure out, as it was gone before he could even start. Lukas broke into a smile, huffing, before turning his attention to Arthur. “I agree with him. Yer mom is… interesting, and even if she had her… thing, it’s not a valid reason to break our friendship.”

Arthur nodded, smiling, happy with the answers that he received. He turned, walking to his closet, and as he pulled the doors open, scanning for extra blankets and pillows, Lukas added:

“Oh, and I told my mom that I was stayin’ over and I don’t wanna call her to pick me up.”

He scowled as Vlad snickered, turning his head to give Lukas a look of distaste. The latter shrugged, a small smile on his face, looking away and shrinking into himself as Arthur deadpanned. Lukas took in a sharp breath, letting it out through his mouth, silently tapping his foot against the floor. “And because you’re one of my best friends, of course. Though it hasn’t been long, our friendship is valuable to me.”

Arthur smiled sarcastically, turning back to his closet. As he took a step inside, nudging some thrown-in junk with his foot, he spoke. “Thank you. That means a lot.”

His friends nodded and the three exchanged smiles, Arthur’s a bit more fake than the others. The last few minutes of that disastrous dinner kept replaying, and though they had said otherwise, Arthur couldn’t help but feel as if his mother had done some damage. Irreversible damage.

Arthur could’ve gotten them out of there. He could’ve shoved Vlad and Lukas up the stairs and into his room, plates in hand, promising to bring them down when they were done. But no, he had to sit there and watch as she cracked and snapped, attacking everyone as if she were a rabid honey badger. It only showed that he was losing his touch, losing that sense of his when shit was about to hit the fan.

They took turns going into the bathroom and changing into their pajamas, the two that were free pulling the blankets and pillows from Arthur’s closet and off his bed. Throwing them onto the floor in a giant heap, the three were set on making a makeshift bed, ignoring Arthur’s in favor of using it for their planned shenanigans for the evening. Even if they did decided to use it, it was too small to fit all three of them in it.

The carpet was plush, and comfortable enough that none of them would be waking up before the crack of dawn showed, complaining of back pain. Since they had only moved in during the height of summer, which wasn’t that long ago, the carpet was stain-free. Well, except for a minor tea spill back in August. But he’d gotten that cleaned up quickly and thoroughly, to the point where one would have to get down on their hands and knees to notice the stain.

Vlad unfolded one of the thinner blankets, laying it over the top of a thicker one. “So, what’re the plans for tonight?” He looked between Arthur and Lukas expectantly, pulling the corners of the blanket flat.

Arthur froze, looking up from his patting and stretching. “Uh…” He didn’t want to admit that he had not gotten that far, had not expected to get this far, so he racked his mind for something to do, Arthur said the first thing that popped up, acting nonchalant, as if he had it planned the first time he proposed them staying over. “I was thinking that maybe we could talk and read. Stuff like that.”

Lukas looked over to him, raising an eyebrow. Arthur smiled back, his eyes wide, sending over a silent message not to ask him anything about his answer. He received no reply in return.

Hanging his head and going back to what he was doing, Vlad talked as he worked. “That sounds like a good idea. I’ve got a new one to show y’all.” He stood, brushing invisible dust off his knees, looking over their little ensemble with a critical eye. Arthur did the same, and when he noticed that it was a bit flat and thin, cringed. Vlad followed suit, putting his hands to his hips and giving Arthur a wince. “You don’t happen to have any more blankets, do ya?”

Arthur nodded his head, rolling his shoulders back as he stood. They had a closet in the hallway, one that was filled with sheets and bedding for the guest room. He had thought of it earlier, had acknowledged it as a possible trip, but didn’t think they would need it. He had hoped they wouldn’t. “Yeah, we do. I’ll be right back.”

He padded to the door, putting his hand against the lock and freezing. Behind him, he could hear a confused noise and some shuffling, but he ignored it. A wave of thoughts ran through his mind, but he waved them all away, thinking himself pathetic. He twisted the lock and pulled the door open, light from the hallway pouring in.

Arthur shut the door on his way out, a soft click sounding as it connected with the doorway. He stood in his place for a second, blowing a deep breath out, carding his fingers through his hair. This entire evening was a mess.

His socks swished against the hardwood, the hem of his cotton pajama pants ghosting over his ankles as he walked. The closet was at the end of the hall, right next to his parents’ bedroom, so he would be able to sneak in-and-out quickly, should he stay quiet.

He wrapped his hands around the cold, metal handles, rubbing his thumb over the engraved patterns. It was smooth, his finger gliding over its dips and bends. He continued rubbing even as he pulled both doors open, wincing at the squeaky noise that was a result. They would definitely be putting something on that.

Knowing that someone likely heard the shriek of pain that the closet emitted, Arthur stepped inside, pushing up on the tips of his toes to reach the very top shelf. He grabbed onto the blanket at the very bottom, pulling it down with a hard yank.

Arthur shielded his head as piles and piles of bedding came tumbling down on top of him, falling from his head to the floor. He looked around, scanning for anyone in the area that might’ve seen his blunder, before quickly picking up all the fallen blankets.

He piled them all up in his arms, doing an odd dance to keep them from falling back down. Arthur leaned to the side, attempting to use his foot to close the closet, before giving up after a few failed tries. Coming back out after dropping off the blankets would be a more efficient way to do it, he concluded, and would save him a few embarrassing tries.

Scanning the floor for any ones he had dropped, Arthur nodded, feeling satisfied, when he found none. He turned, waddling his way down the hallway, stopping every few moments to adjust the pile and stretch.

“Arthur.”

He froze, cursing under his breath, and turned to his mother. Her eyes were red and puffy, trails of black makeup running down her cheeks. She had changed into sweatpants and a solid t-shirt, a box of tissues being clutched in her hand.

Rolling his eyes, he turned and continued his way back to his room, not wanting- no, not willing to give her the mind and attention she oh-so desperately wanted.

“Arthur, Arthur come back here.” Her voice was wobbly, as if she were just about to burst into another fresh set of tears.

He shook his head, huffing. “I don’t want to deal with you right now.”

This was just another part of her game. A pity party to try and draw Arthur in, to make her seem like a caring and empathetic mother who had just gotten into a petty argument with her son. She would wrap her arms around him, softly rubbing his back, whispering about how sorry she was. Of course, her apology would only be a group of thinly veiled insults, blaming him for what happened, and her grip on his shoulders would have her nails digging into it, but from the outside, from far away, you wouldn’t be able to tell anything was wrong.

Arthur was disgusted with himself that he had fallen into her trap more than once in his life, and quite often during those years when he sought validation and praise from her exclusively.

From the corner of his eye, he could see her shake her head, pulling a tissue from the box and dabbing it under her eye. Her breath hitched. “Don’t say that.” She took a step forward just as he resumed moving. “Arthur, dear, don’t ever stay that.”

He rolled his eyes, maneuvering the blankets to sit between his chest and right arm as he used his left to open the door. He pushed it open, seeing Vlad and Lukas’ heads rise.

Arthur stopped in the doorway, turning to her one final time. He deadpanned. “I don’t care. Go get some eye drops, your tears are a bit lacking.”

He could hear Vlad snort and his mother scramble for words as he walked into his room, throwing the blankets haphazardly onto the floor and slamming the door shut. Arthur squatted as his friends started grabbing blankets and adding them to the “sleep zone”, as it had been called one time, Arthur joining in once he got himself situated.

Vlad glanced up at him multiple times, obviously expecting something, but Arthur ignored it until the former stopped working. He looked up, raising an eyebrow, frowning. “What?”

He shook his head, huffing. “Are you okay, Arthur?”

“Excuse me?”

“I mean, after tonight, with yer mom and everything, it’s just kinda worryin’ that you go through that every single day.” He averted his eyes, fidgeting, as if saying so might set Arthur on a warpath.

Arthur nodded his head, smiling. “Yes, I assure you, I’m perfectly fine.”

Lukas sighed. “If ya say so.”

The room fell silent as they started diligently working, the pile of blankets Arthur retrieved slowly but surely dwindling. It gave him some time to think, and he went on autopilot, letting his hands do the work as he was lost into his thoughts.

Mathias had said that he was pretty sure that Heracles had a crush on Kiku. However, a “pretty sure” was not a definite, and if Arthur were to go in and talk to him in the blind… It would be disastrous. It could spell the end for his entire plan, gone and revealed before it even began. He would have to go in and probe for himself, bring it up to him to see his reaction, but for now…

A bit of outside opinion would do.

“I’ve got a question, and I want it to stay between the three of us.” Vlad and Lukas looked up, Arthur’s attention going immediately to the latter of the duo. “This means that Mathias is not included.”

Lukas blushed, a rosy red spreading across his cheeks. He hung his head and crossed his arms, grumbling under his breath.

Vlad snickered, but nodded his head, waving his hands for Arthur to continue. “Yeah, sure, whaddaya need?” He scooted closer, leaning in, as if he expected to hear some deep and dark secret.

Arthur sat, criss-crossing his legs. “Er-” He tried to figure out how he was going to say this, how to make it sound like he was doing nothing but asking a question out of pure curiosity. Arthur tipped his head back, humming and studying the ceiling, his throat vibrating as he did so. From the tapping and huffs and puffs, he could tell they were growing impatient.

He sat up straight, tsking, and said the first thing that came into his mind. “If you have a crush on someone, what are some of the signs that would show?” He trailed off at the end of his sentence, his voice growing quieter, and he crossed his arms.

He waited for them to speak, preparing a mental list of all of Heracles’ behaviors around Kiku, or at least the ones he had already seen, where he would check them off one by one.

Vlad’s eyes widened and he lowered his head a bit, pursing his lips. Lukas deadpanned, staying silent and watching Arthur with keen interest. Vlad stuttered as he spoke, taking a few pauses to think of more. Arthur nodded each time he brought up a symptom. “Well, uh… when you’re around them, you’re constantly blushin’-”

Check.

“You always wanna talk to ‘em, no matter what it’s about-”

Check.

“I guess you can’t help but have a distaste of those that are really close to them, like a boyfriend or a girlfriend or someone like that.”

Check. It was extremely obvious that Heracles had a dislike for Alfred- at the least- and vice versa, for that matter.

“You can’t stop thinkin’ about them.”

Arthur winced. He could assume, but assumptions weren’t confirmations and it was iffy.

“And, uh… every time they do somethin’, you can’t help but-”

“Arthur.” Vlad frowned as Lukas cut him off, but the latter didn’t seem to care. He narrowed his eyes, looking Arthur up and down, his head cocked to the side.

He raised his eyebrow, a silent question to Lukas’ verbal one. They sat that way for about a minute or two, Arthur drumming his fingers against his thigh in a random pattern to pass the time.

It wasn’t until Vlad huffed, crossing his arms and pouting, that the silence broke. “Lukas~! Come on,” he whined, lightly shoving Lukas’ shoulder.

Lukas ignored him, keeping his eyes on Arthur. He repeated his name again.

“Yes?” Arthur pushed some strands of hair out of his face, giving his friend a sweet, honeyed smile.

When Lukas spoke, he asked such a question in such a blunt and dead way that Arthur couldn’t help but choke on his own saliva. “Do you have a crush on Alfred F. Jones?”

Vlad erupted, jumping to his feet, a large smile on his face and eyes wide. He pumped his fist up in the air, yelling about how he knew it, doing a small happy dance.

Arthur gave Lukas a look of horror, who returned only a raised eyebrow. He was expecting an answer, then.

Reverting to his instincts, Arthur started waving his hands, shaking his head with the same amount of vigor. When he spoke, he stuttered over his words, something that made his cheeks heat u. “No- no, of course, not. Why would I- why would I have a crush on Alfred, of all people.”

Lukas broke into a smug smile, leaning back and crossing his arms. Vlad had by then finished whatever he was doing, and sat down with his legs in a butterfly position. A small dimple appeared in the corner of his mouth as the latter spoke, his teeth showing as he smiled. “Ugh! Why didn’t I think of it before? Yer always talkin’ about him, always run into him, and-”

Vlad perked up, eyes growing to the size of saucers. His mouth gaped, and he raised a hand to cover it. “Oh my god. At Lukas and Mathias’ date, when you followed Alfred into the bathroom, were you two-”

“No. No. Don’t you dare go there. You have no idea what actually hap-”

Lukas nodded, getting what Vlad was trying to say. “Arthur, if you’re in a secret relationship with Alfred, we’ll support ya. But I really think that you two need to tell Kiku or it’s gonna get pretty messy-”

“I’m not in a relationship with Alfred,” he yelled, running his fingers through the carpet. How could they, his very own friends, assume that he was in love with someone he hated? Sure, Arthur found the fool attractive, had since the first day they met, but as soon as he opens his loud mouth, all of the perks of his looks went down the drain. He would never be able to stand such a person so much as to be his friend, much less in something more. “And I’m not telling Kiku, because there’s nothing I need to tell that snake.”

Vlad pursed his lips into a fine line. “You and Alfred would be such a cute couple, though.” Nodding his head, Lukas said his words of agreement.

Arthur deadpanned. “I doubt it.”

“But you would!”

Lukas stood, stepping over their pile of blankets and squatted next to Arthur. The latter balked as he was pulled into a loose hug, the former resting his head on his shoulder. “Don’t worry, Art. You supported me in my awkward love affair, so Vlad and I’ll support you in yours. Even if it’s three times worse.”

Vlad nodded, clapping his hands together, and Arthur wondered for perhaps what was the millionth time in the past few months what exactly he had just gotten himself into.

#Aph UsUk #UsUk #Aph America #Aph England #RantingFangirl #The Fanfiction Life of RantingFangirl

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