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melancholyshadow · 3 years

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sunday’s with a solider || b. barnes

part one

summary: after a good date with bucky, (y/n) figures out who she’s really getting involved with.

pairing: bucky barnes x female!librarian!reader

warnings: kissing (??), swearing

an: im honestly speechless, the first part of this series has 150+ notes! i’m so happy you guys liked it! i’m debating on make this a three or a four-part series, please let me know what you think, but there will definitely be at least another part. one of the next, or the next, will include some spice, if you know what i mean. and who do y’all want me to write about next? im thinking mr. steve rogers.

tags: @biixlv

“Please tell me you’re a booth person and not a table person.” You chuckled, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Uh, yeah.” He laughed and rolled his eyes at you. He began walking towards one of the booths. You followed happily behind him, scooting into the opposite side of the booth. He pulled off his hat and both his gloves, setting them on the seat next to him. You propped your head on the palm of your hands, stopping yourself from looking at his metal hand, you weren’t even sure if it was metal.

The diner was one that had been in this town for, at least, forty years, and it definitely showed its age. It was trying to be a ‘retro diner’ in the eighties, so that aged it another thirty years. You grew up coming here with your family, the food was good, and you thought the inside was cute. The building was longer than it was wide, and the floor reminded you of a checkerboard. There was a long bar on the left, space for waiters to maneuver, and a long panel of metal enclosing the kitchen portion. Bright red bar stools were implemented into the floor, screwed into the floor, every two feet or so. On the right, were five or six booths, the same shade of red as the bar stools, big enough for about four people max.

“Hey, sugar!” A familiar voice chirped to your left. Your eyes met a familiar pair of green ones, and a smile immediately filled your face. “Hey, Mabel!” You cooed, half-standing under the table and wrapping your arms around her small, fragile frame. She smelled like coffee and smoke, as she always did. The two of you pulled away, and her eyes instantly went to Bucky. “Who's your friend?” She asked, raising her eyebrows at you. “Mabel, this is my friend James. James, this is Mabel.” You explained, quickly introducing the two. He smiled at her and stuck out his ‘normal’ hand to give her a handshake, which she was very fond of.

“Well, it is great to meet you, James! What can I get you to drink?” She had abandoned her notepad well before you were born, her ability to just remember someone’s order still amazed you. “Coffee please, no sugar or creamer please.” She smiled at him, and turned back towards me, “Regular for you, dear?” She asked, and you smiled, scrunching up your eyes and nose. She practically pranced away with a huge smile on her face. Bucky chuckled, pulling you from your thoughts, turning your head back towards him. His eyes were scanning over the faded laminated menu.

“How do you know Mabel?” He asked, looking up and unzipping his jacket, pulling it off his abdomen and onto the seat beside him, with his gloves and hat. “I grew up coming here with my family, she’s known me since I was in my mother’s stomach.” You explained, pointing to a picture above the bar. It was pretty faded after sitting in direct sunlight for over two decades, but it was a picture of Mabel, your mom, your dad, and you, you all had on party hats. “I had my first ten birthdays at this diner.” Bucky squinted his eyes and smiled once he made out the picture of baby you.

“That’s awesome.” He said looking back at you. He opened his mouth to say something else, but Mabel cut him off. “Here is that coffee, Mr. James.” She slid the coffee in front of him, “And a regular for you, (Y/M/N).” She wiped her hands on her apron, “What can I get you two to eat?” Bucky looked at me, wanting me to order first. “We’ll both take the ‘67.” You smiled. She copied, “You got it, dearie.” And she walked away. Bucky cleared his throat, “Just trust me, Bucky,” You chuckled, placing your hands on top of his, “You’re gonna love it.” He paused for a moment, “I’ll hold you to that.” He winked at you. Did he just wink at you? Was he flirting? You immediately shot back at a wink and a flirty response, “Deal.”

The two of you ate and chatted for about an hour and a half. “Okay, you were right, that was the best food I’ve ever had.” He said, stacking your plates and utensils together, making it easier for Mabel when she took them off the table. “Can I get you two anything else?” She asked, picking up the two plates with ease. Bucky looked at you and you nodded a ‘no,’ and he looked back at Mabel, “No thank you, ma’am, but I will take the check.” He smiled.

“No, Mabel, split the check pl-” But Mabel cut you off, “Sorry, dear, my hearing aid died, I can’t quite hear you. I’ll bring that check right to you, Mr. James.” Quickly walking away. “Bucky, no, I will pay for mine.” You insisted, going to reach for your purse. You looked around you in your seat in a panic, and then you remembered, it was in the saddlebag attached to his bike. He laughed at you as you came to that realization. “You did that on purpose, didn’t you?” You sighed, taking a sip of your drink. He simply shrugged and smiled, pulling his wallet out of his back pocket.

Once Mabel returned with the bill and Bucky’s card, the two of you stood, and he let you walk out first. It was a lot colder now, goosebumps layered your exposed arms, like a reflex you wrapped your arms around yourself. “Here, you take this.” He insisted, placing his heavy leather jacket on your shoulders. “No, I can't, you're gonna get cold too.” You began to shrug it off, but he placed his hands on your shoulders, stopping you. “I’ll be fine.” He smirked at you, his hands lingering for a little longer than normal.

“Ready?” He asked as he straddled his bike, once more. You stuck your arms through the long sleeves, which went way past your fingertips. You took your seat behind him, and he handed you the helmet, and you slid it over your head. Similar to earlier, you snaked your arms around him, clasping your hands together, and resting around his mid-abdomen. His hands, once again, landed on your thighs, pulling you even closer to him, making a different type of goosebumps cover your arms.

“Hang on tight, doll.” He said as the bike came to life. You were so glad you were wearing a helmet, so he couldn’t see the brush creep onto your cheeks. As you two rode, he used his prosthetic hand to steer the bike and kept his flesh hand on your knee the entire time. The sky had ditched the orange, pink, and red hues and was now littered in stars and moonlight. You didn’t want this to end, you felt like you could stay there for hours, but the library came into view a lot sooner than you wanted it to.

The next day came and you got excited, as always, to see Bucky. Today was a little different though, after your date last night. Wait, was that even a date? It had to be, right? I mean he paid and flirted with you.

“Bucky, why do you come in here every day?” You asked, peering at him over the book in your hands. He didn’t move for a second, you assumed he was finishing the sentence he was reading. “Well, all the libraries in New York City are crowded and noisy.” He explained, “So when I found this place while scoping out new libraries, even though it is quite a distance, I knew this place was it for me.” He smiled at you. “At least that was the reason initially.” He muttered, picking his book back up.

“And what is that supposed to mean?” You set your book down this time, squinting your eyes at him, and propping your head up on your hands. “Well obviously, I now come back because the shitty coffee you offer is to die for.” He said sarcastically. You gasped and threw one of your pens at him, bouncing off his chest and onto the floor. He broke out into a fit of laughter, and you soon followed.

“No, but now I come back to hang out with you.” He admitted to you, avoiding your stare. “Oh that so sweet…” You started, “...Dork.” Throwing another pen at him, this time hitting the bill of his hat. Bucky had come in every day for a little over a month now and missed not a single Sunday. “Hey (Y/F/N)?” Bucky asked, looking back up from his book. Your eyes didn’t leave the pages of your book, but you answered, “Yes, Buck?” You asked back, flipping the page.

“I won’t be here tomorrow, and for a couple days after that.” When the words left his lips, a wave of sadness washed over you. Your lips twisted into a pout, looking towards him. “Why?” You asked, dragging out the word. “I have some obligations.” You rolled your eyes at him, “Okay, Mr. Mysterious.” You scoffed, feeling a bit upset. How long had he known? Why was he just now telling you? “I’m gonna be so bored without you.” You whined, leaning back in your chair with a huff.

“I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”

It was closing time now, and as usual, Bucky walked you to your car. “You better bring me a souvenir from wherever you’re going.” You joked, tossing your purse into the passenger seat, and turning back towards Bucky. “Would you prefer a T-shirt? Maybe some socks? How about a shot glass?” He joked back, leaning against the side of your car. “Surprise me.” You laughed, pushing his chest.

As you went to pull away from his chest, his flesh hand wrapped around your wrist, softly. He placed it back on his chest, and his metal hand went to your hip, pulling you closer to him. The only distance between both of your chest was being occupied by your hand. You swore up and down that he could hear your heartbeat, but you were soon reassured because you could feel his heartbeat racing just as much as yours was. Bucky glanced down at your lips, and you did the same.

You closed the space between your lips, and without thinking your eyes fluttered closed, taking in everything happening over your entire body. His lips were soft, tasting like coffee and mint. The growing stubble on his chin rubbed against the softness of your cheeks. His flesh hand was warm around your wrist, gripping it softly, he never wanted to hurt you. But the gestures with his metal hand were very different. It was leaving a cool tingling sensation against the small patch of exposed skin, and his grip was tighter, pushing you impossibly closer to him. You took your free hand, and placed it on his face, thumb running over his cheek, and your other four fingers resting on his neck.

After what feels like minutes, but was probably only about thirty seconds, you pulled away from him. Reluctantly, of course. The two of you just stood there, not moving, relishing at the moment for as long as you could. “You know I meant to surprise me souvenir-wise, right?” You chuckled, messing with the hair on the nape of his neck. “Oh okay, we can just never do that again.” He sighed, messing with you.

“No, no, we can definitely do that again.”

It was the first Sunday without Bucky in a while, he had been gone for almost a week now, you assumed working on his ‘obligations.’ You had been keeping yourself busy with a new book series, one that Bucky actually recommended to you. But today would be full of dusting, reorganizing, putting away some newer books, and vacuuming. It was probably around 3:30 in the afternoon, and you were dusting the large bay windows by the front of the store.

You could feel the music moving through your body, making it impossible for you not to dance, at least just a little wiggle. You swayed your hips, the music taking over, singing into the duster like a microphone. Your free hand ran up the side of your body, from your thigh all the way up to your face. You threw your arm up over your head, and prancing around the tables, shifting the duster from a microphone to an electric guitar. When the song was finally over, and you were very much out of breath, you made your way back to the window. And when you did so, your heart dropped to your toes. There was a man standing on the opposite side of the window, watching you.

It only took a few seconds for your fear to turn into relief. It was Bucky. You dashed to the left towards the door, unlocking the door, and running out to greet him. Practically leaping towards him, you wrapped both arms around his neck, and his arms snaked around your waist. After a few moments of swaying and just taking in his presence, you pulled away. He was smiling widely, “I didn’t mean to end your concert so soon, I was enjoying it.” Adding a chuckle. Your face blushed, and you put your hand over your eyes, peeking at him through your middle and ring finger, “Did you see the whole thing?” You asked, dreading his answer. “The whole thing.”

The two of you walked back inside, the music still playing loudly. There was a slow song playing, and you grabbed your phone to turn it down, but Bucky stopped you. “Wanna dance?” He asked, putting his hand out for you to grab. You smiled, happily taking it. He pulled your chest against his. Your arms rest on his shoulders, your fingers loosely interlocked. Both hands on your hips, both of you just rocking side to side. The music wasn’t even registering in your brain, you were just focusing on this moment with him.

“I remember when this song came out.” He said softly. You cocked your eyebrow at him, “Didn’t this song come out in the fifties?” You asked confused, what did he mean by that? “So you really don’t know who I am, huh?” The question caught you off-guard, it sounded very egotistical. “No..?” You asked more like a question. And that’s when he explained everything, making a very long story very short. He explained the arm, the serum, and the ‘obligations.’

“You’re a fucking Avenger?” You asked, head in your hands, elbows on your knee. “Well, technically I’ve never been asked to be one, but kind of.” His hand on your back, rubbing it in small circles. “So you’re the James Buchanan Barnes from the Captain America museum?” He nodded. Everything kind of flooded back to your memory, you knew you heard the nickname “Bucky” before, and you knew he looked somewhat familiar, but you assumed he just looked kinda similar to an actor or something.

It was silent for a good five minutes, but Bucky broke it. “Hey, guess what?” He asked, trying to hide the upturn of his lips. What now? Was he gonna break some more news to you? Was he also part alien? “Hmm?” That was all you said, running your fingers through your hair. He moved his hand to reach into his backpack and pulled out a book, sliding it towards you.

“Russian Urban Legends.” You read the title, quickly flipping through the book with your thumb. “Flip to page 48, and tell me what it says.” He said, propping his head upon his hands. You did as he said and landed on page forty-eight. “The Winter Soldier.” You read the words written in a bright red font, the page decorated in grainy photos and ridiculously cheesy government lettering and drawings. Bucky looked at you, prompting you to continue.

“A ghost story or a real threat?”

#bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes one shot #sebastian stan #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan one shot #bucky barnes x librarian!reader #mcu #mcu one shot #james barnes #bucky barnes x reader

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readyplayerhobi · 6 years

Text

Papillon

; Taehyung x Reader

; Childhood best friends to lovers/Pregnancy!AU

; Genre: Fluff, light angst

; Word Count: 15k

; Synopsis: Kim Taehyung has been a constant presence in your life for the last 25 years. The bestest friend a girl could ever want; he’s been there for you through all the good times and the bad. What happens though when you find yourself pregnant and abandoned? What happens when your best friend steps up in ways you never imagined?

; A/N: Behold! My first Tae fic...FINALLY. I struggle to write him so...I really...really hope everyone enjoys this!

Sitting on the floor with your back to the couch, you let out a deep and troubled sigh as your fingers grasp at your hair. A slight tug makes your scalp smart, but you find that it’s a lot better to focus on that pain than the thoughts that are racing through your head right now.

What were you going to do? You’d finally managed to stabilise your life, with no student loans anymore and your job finally on the up. It had taken 6 years to finally get to the position of manager in your marketing team, being the ripe age of 30. Not that there was anything wrong with 30.

And you’d felt that it was all coming together, with a great job, a great family, wonderful friends and a boyfriend that you felt could possibly be the one. You’d only been dating Jin for six months, but you’d felt that the whip smart lawyer could be the one you’d finally tie the knot with.

Finally get your parents off your back about marriage and possibly work on providing them with the grandkids they so desperately wanted.

Leaning your head back against the cushions, you stare up at the white ceiling with a dull gaze as you consider that it’s probably for the best you hadn’t gotten too in depth when planning out your future. Because who would have seen this coming?

The door opening lets you know that your roommate has finally come back from his own place of work, and the rustling of bags tells you that he’s likely brought your favourite takeout from the Chinese down the street.

“Honey! I’m hoooome!” Taehyung calls out cheerfully, his tall and broad frame walking through the door animatedly as he places the bag of food down on the coffee table in front of you. He works as an art curator in the biggest art museum in the city, and his outfits are usually pieces of art themselves.

Today, he’s wearing a pair of black slacks alongside a uniquely patterned shirt that seems to be a few sizes too big for him with floaty sleeves, yet he works it elegantly. It’s probably the fact that Taehyung has the face of a god and the body of a model that he gets away with his eccentric fashion choices.

That and the fact he’s actually really good at his job too, with an eye for art that will not only sell well, but is likely to be worth millions in the future.

Anyone that sees you together often wonders how on earth you became friends with each other. Taehyung is loud and boisterous with a bright, boxy smile that enamours everyone alongside a magnetic personality that means he makes friends wherever he goes. You, on the other hand, generally stick to jeans and a cute shirt along with being more comfortable at home than anywhere else.

You like to say that your social battery runs out during the work hours, when you’re expected to socialise and play nice with other people and businesses to bring in the big bucks. There’s no way on earth you’d be caught out with even more people after work, particularly when you live with Taehyung!

But your friendship with Taehyung is actually decades old, matured like a fine wine. You had first made friends with him when you were only four years old. He’d moved in next door when his dad had got a new job, and the boisterous young boy had demanded to be your friend when he saw your awesome princess castle.

He’d stuck by your side during all your years of school, protecting you from bullies by attracting their attention instead. And when it had come to college, it had been a natural progression that you both attend the same college whereupon you’d developed a group of mutual friends that you could lean on when necessary.

Living together after college had finished had also been a no-brainer, particularly given that you had both found jobs in the same city. For two years, Jimin had lived with you both as well. The sweet guy had been a friend Tae had made during college, who had become pretty close with you as well.

You’d even dated him for a hot minute, before realising quickly that you both worked better as friends than anything else. But the threesome of best friends had meant that there had been no hard feelings, which you were thankful for.

Out of all of your friends though, you would always proclaim Taehyung to be your closest friend. The ultimate best friend. Now and forever. He’d been the reason a few of your relationships had broken down, and vice versa in terms of him. It turns out that some people don’t like the idea of their partner having a best friend of the opposite gender, never mind living with them.

But Taehyung and you had refused to give up your friendship over the prospect of a partner. In your opinion, if they couldn’t accept the wonderful, if slightly odd, man who had been at all your most important life events, then they weren’t going to get you either.

You watch quietly as he goes into the kitchen to grab your chopsticks, preferring the use of the ones you’d both bought years ago to the ones the store gives you. He comes back over and sits down next to you on the floorboards, crossing his legs as he hands you the box of lo mein while he takes a box of kung pao shrimp, placing a sharing bag of prawn crackers between the two of you.

“Is there a particular reason we’re sat on the floor and not the perfectly good couch we saved up while sacrificing good food?” He asks, brow raising underneath his straight hair while he shoves a pile of lo mein into his mouth. In peek Tae behaviour, he’d dyed his hair platinum blonde the other week and was particularly enjoying the use of non-permanent dye to bring all sorts of colours to life on his head.

Currently, it was bubblegum pink and you watched him in silence for a few moments. His presence was unbelievably comforting, and suddenly the emotion that you’d been holding in for the last few hours came bubbling to the surface.

A sniffle is the only sound that lets Taehyung know something is wrong, and he freezes in place with his chopsticks in his mouth. Turning slowly, he looks at you in confusion, his beautiful brown eyes going wide when he sees yours beginning to fill with tears.

Immediately he’s placing his chopsticks on top of his box, which promptly goes onto the table while he wiggles around until he’s facing you completely. Reaching out, he cups your face gently as worry paints over his own at the sight of you so upset.

“Hey, hey! What’s wrong? Eevee, come on. Tell me.” His voice, so deep and calming normally is lowered even further as he attempts to soothe your frayed emotions. The nickname is decades old as well, stemming from when you’d both discovered Pokemon and become obsessed. Eevee was, and still is, your favourite Pokemon and your love for it had let to him using it as a nickname.

Leaning forward, you let your face smush his neck as you breathe in the oh so pleasant scent of your best friend, the base smell unchanging since he was a kid. Despite Taehyung’s obsession with expensive art and clothing, he was surprisingly simple when it came to himself.

Wrapping your arms around his lean waist, you contemplate for a few moments how to tell him. It shouldn’t be this hard to admit this to your best friend, particularly given it should have been much harder to tell your boyfriend. But then again, you were more worried about Taehyung’s opinion than Jin’s, which should say everything about that relationship honestly.

“I’m pregnant.”

Taehyung freezes in places, his muscles stiffening as the words penetrate and compute into his mind before he slowly pulls away from you, face carefully blank as he looks at you. “Pregnant? Are you sure? It’s not like last time right?”

He’s talking about the incident in college, when you’d been afraid that you were pregnant as your period had come late. For a young guy, he’d been surprisingly calm about the whole thing and had been the one to buy the pregnancy test for you.

It had been negative, but you’d forever appreciate how Taehyung had become your rock of stability when the waters of your life had become rough and unstable. And right now, he was doing it again by speaking carefully and logically.

Wiping at your eyes, you nod slowly before glancing down at your hands which play in your lap. “I took a pregnant test this morning. I keep being sick in the mornings so I called in today, got the day off. Took the test. It was positive.”

Taehyung is quiet before he takes in a deep breath and lets it out slowly, your nose wrinkling as his lo mein smelling breath hits your face. “Did you take more than one? I don’t want this to sound callous but...it might be one of those false positives right?”

“I took three to be sure. All positive. And given the morning sickness, I’m pretty positive myself.” He licks his lips as his eyes flick all over the places, his mind evidently working at a few hundreds miles a minute.

“Okay...it’s Jin’s right? I mean, you’re not the kind to cheat but I just want to-” Reaching over, you place your fingertips over his lips and he falls silent underneath your touch. Giving him a tremulous smile, you let out a shaky breath of your own.

“Yeah it’s Jin’s. That’s why I...I mean the tears...I told him. He came over on his lunch break and...I just blurted it out. Probably not the best way.” Taehyung runs his fingers through his hair, making the carefully arranged strands fly into a mess as he does so.

“He didn’t take it well.” His voice is flat, and you can tell that he’s trying to control his emotions as carefully as he can. Taehyung hadn’t liked Jin, and he hadn’t understood why you liked him. He’d thought the lawyer was too cold and vain for someone like you, who seemed to be more interested in himself than with his own girlfriend.

You wished that you could turn round and tell him that he was wrong, but after your boyfriend, or rather ex, had coldly dumped you after giving him the news, you could only admit he was right.

“No, he didn’t. He said that someone like him couldn’t be seen to be having a child out of wedlock, because that matters in today’s world you know. And that kids were not part of his life plan yet. He said that he’d pay for an abortion if I wanted it, or if I chose to keep it then he’d pay child support. Jin’s not exactly a catch, but he’s not an idiot. He knows the law.” You say wryly, snorting attractively as you feel your nose running.

Taehyung says nothing though, simply wiping away your tears as they fall with flattened lips. “He’s an ass. A giant dick. I’m gonna kick him in his dick if I see him again. What a prick. Who goes and gets a girl pregnant after only six months then says that? God, I’m gonna call him Elsa whenever I see him because what an ice queen.”

Your best friend continues to grumble on, his anger over how your ex has treated you igniting the more he talks until you lay your own hands over his. Giving him a tentative smile, you shake your head.

“No, it’s okay Tae. As much as I’d like to cry and rage about it, I’m a fully grown woman who knew the risks of sex. I’m guessing we were the unlikely percentage where a condom breaks and my birth control fails, so this pregnancy must really have been supposed to be, huh?” You joke lightly, watching as his brows fall.

“How can you joke?” He whispers, confusion laced through every word as he leans forward and rests his head against yours. “He abandoned you Eevee, sweetheart. It’s not like he left you with a dog, it’s a baby. Lifelong commitment. Why is it fair that he gets to walk away and you’re stuck?”

You appreciate that he doesn’t even question whether you’ll get rid of it, as it’s not something you’d ever consider. If you’d been younger, then sure. But you were financially stable and had already discussed the fact that you wanted kids at some point to Tae when you’d started dating Jin.

At 30, you weren’t getting younger and while it may sound a little ridiculous to think that, it was the 21st century and there were plenty of capable single mothers out there. You didn’t particularly want to be a single mom, but you would be if you had to be. It’s be fine, right?

“It’s not fair, but what can I do about it? I already had my cry earlier. Now I just...I need my best friend please. I need to...to plan. I need to plan because...well he’s made it clear he’s not staying around. I mean...god Tae, what do I do?” You almost whine at him, a sliver of panic finally appearing to break through your calm.

“Hey, come on Eevee. You’ve been calm. You’ve been so calm. You’re an adult woman and you’re not alone.” Your bravado falters at that as tears begin to fall once more, slowly tracking down your face as you finally begin to face what you’d been so strenuously avoiding. In the space of only a few hours, your relationship had fallen apart and you were going to bring a baby into the world in only a few months.

“I am. I was. It’s just...this isn’t how I imagined it TaeTae,” You whisper, pressing your forehead to his shoulder firmly as the tears drip onto his slacks. “I just...maybe I was an idiot but I always imagined having kids with the man I love standing at my side. Watching him cry when the baby is born and seeing our child grow up in his arms. But now...it’s just me.”

Tae wraps his arms around your shoulders even tighter as he begins to rock you calmingly, pressing a gentle kiss to your hair as he does so. “I’m sorry. But...you’re not alone okay? It’s not going to go how you imagined it but...life rarely does. And you are, probably the most capable person I’ve ever met.”

He pushes you until you can see his face and gives you one of his heart warming, endearing smiles that make his eyes almost disappear as his cheeks rise. It’s only then that you can see the sheen of tears in his own eyes, letting you see how much he cares for you.

“You are going to be a great mom. And you’re not going to be alone. I can’t be that guy you talked about, but I’m damn well going to be your best friend who will do anything you need. I’ll be here for you, I’ll take you to your appointments, I’ll go to those...nasal classes or whatever they’re called,” You snort at that and interrupt with ante-natal. “Whatever. The point is. I’m here for you. I will be the best damn...non dad-dad there could ever be because I do not want my best friend to flounder, not when I can help.”

Your crying even harder at that, at the earnest expression on his face and the sincere words that fall from his lips. Shaking your head, you give him a shaky smile as you try to dissuade him, despite the sheer warmth his words make you feel.

“Tae, you can’t. I mean...you’re my best friend and we live together yeah but...I can find somewhere new. Your relationships already hate me, imagine them finding out I’m pregnant and you’re doing all this? Or you trying to bring a girl home and the baby is just screaming. You have a life too TaeTae, I can’t ruin that.” You beg, not wanting to make his life harder than it is.

He’s shaking his head in turn though, wagging his finger at you sternly. “Do not. Do not do that. Don’t isolate yourself already. You are not moving out of here, and I’m not moving out. Neither of us want to, nor do we need to. If you really think I’m going to abandon my best friend just for some pussy or dick, you’re wrong.”

Tae runs his fingers through your hair lovingly before he gives you a sweet smile. “There’s not a chance on earth I’m abandoning you now. I’ve been your best friend for 25 years. Now it’s time for me to prove that and stand by your side. You don’t have Jin, but you have Taehyung and I hope he’s just as good for you. Besides, you know I love kids and a baby, in my arms??.”

He grips his chest comically while making a funny face, trying to diffuse the moment. Letting out a choked laugh, you let him before you wrap your arms around his neck and squeeze tightly as the fear of what the future will hold and the sheer love you have for your best friend combine in an odd mix. “You’re the bestest TaeTae.”

The next few weeks pass by in a bizarre mix, parts of it zooming by whereas others feel like you’re stuck wading through syrup. You’d made an appointment with your doctor the very next day and Taehyung stuck to his word, attending that appointment and every one after it.

You’d been almost bombarded with information about pregnancy and the various tests and screenings that would be required. It had been a revelation to you that you’d be asked to be tested for certain diseases and other tests that were all aimed at ensuring your baby would be born in the best health possible.

There had also been plenty of advise on your lifestyle and what would change or what would need to be changed. Dietary advice and nutritional advice for what would bring the most benefit to you and your baby, along with the supplements that would keep you going.

The nerves of going to the doctor had been a little surprising, but Taehyung had been a calming presence next to you the whole time. While your mind had been jumping onto the panic button at all the information being given to you, he had been the rational one who had asked questions you wouldn’t have even considered.

What would you be advised to give up during your pregnancy? Alcohol and caffeine were no brainers - though apparently a little caffeine was okay -, but you’d been surprised to discover that it was recommended for you to give up certain cheeses along with random things like paté and liver.

It had been a little awkward when the doctor had given a smile to you both when he’d said that sex was still okay. You hadn’t even had to look at Taehyung to see the grin that he was sporting at that, and you’d half felt like pushing him off the chair.

That would have looked just a little immature though, and you’d been hoping to paint the image of someone who was totally prepared to have a baby. Because you totally weren’t, but the doctor hadn’t needed to know that.

The appointment had been rudimentary, yet it had seemed to be eye opening to Taehyung. That weekend, you’d come back from visiting your parents to break the news to find him sat on the couch with his nose firmly in a book.

Taehyung wasn’t particularly fond of reading normal books, he enjoyed his comics and manga but felt that fiction books took too much time. So it had been a surprise to find him reading what looked to be a whole tome, but a little bending over had let you see the cover.

He’d been reading a book about pregnancy, which had thrown you for a loop. It was such an expectant dad thing to do, causing you to go into the kitchen with a fuzzy feeling in your stomach at the knowledge he was genuinely trying.

As a result of the book, Taehyung had become a fountain of pregnancy related knowledge. He’d taken to cooking meals that were filled with all the nutrition you needed, which had you sitting and watching him with amusement as he wasn’t the greatest cook in the world.

His enthusiasm was adorable, but you were pretty positive he’d get tired of putting in so much effort quicker rather than later. But you’d enjoy it for now and you’d be the first to admit that his excitement was infectious.

It was purely thanks to him that you were actually kind of looking forward to this baby being born, if only to see his bright grin of happiness at getting to hold his nephew. Because Taehyung was totally going to be uncle number one.

Right now, you’re at week 9 in your pregnancy and about to have your first ultrasound. Your work was okay with your pregnancy, though they had no choice really, and you’d managed to get the afternoon off to head to your scan with relatively little fight.

You’re currently laid back in the couch thing they use, with your shirt lifted up and the top of your jeans pushed down. The sonographer is sat in the chair next to you while Taehyung sits on the other side, holding your hand tightly.

It’s stupid to worry, but you’ve been anxious that the scan might find something wrong. Or what if your baby had stopped growing? There was so many things that had run through your mind that you’d spent the night not sleeping until you’d finally got up to get into bed with Tae.

He’d been both tired and confused, but when you’d blurted out all your worries to him about what could be wrong, he’d simply wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you in tight. The comforting smell of your best friend had overwhelmed you while his hands had run along your back in gentle and soothing movements.

Taehyung had been half asleep, but he’d still managed to tell you that there probably wouldn’t be anything wrong but that it was likely natural to worry. Though your fears hadn’t vanished, just the comfort of being in his arms and his calming nature had been enough to allow you to drift into a, thankfully, dreamless sleep.

As such, his hand in yours right now is yet another balm to your soul. It’s easy to see how he manages to deal in art that is worth thousands, sometimes millions, right now with his placid nature.

The sonographer gives you an amiable smile as he turns on the machine, explaining what the scan should show along with what he’ll be checking for. “I’m going to put some ultrasound gel on your stomach now okay? It might be a little cold and ticklish, but that’s okay.”

You nod and watch as he squirts the gel onto your belly before grabbing the probe and pressing it down firmly. Eye flicking to the screen, you both watch with baited breath as it flickers and shows some odd images. Until suddenly, there’s a shape you vaguely recognise from seeing other people’s ultrasounds.

Immediately, you go numb for a moment before reaching out and looking at the sonographer with wide eyes. He smiles brightly as he nods. “Yep, that’s your baby. Looking pretty healthy too. Baby has everything it should have at this point and I can’t see anything that might be a cause for worry. Do you want to hear the heartbeat too?”

You’re nodding before he’s even finished, suddenly desperate to hear that your baby is alive. It’s good being told that it’s okay, but a heartbeat says that it’s alive and here. He smiles before pressing something on the screen and shifting the probe around more before a rapid beat echoes in the room, the tiny thumps making you think of the fluttering of a hummingbird's wings bizarrely.

Pressing your hand to your mouth, a film of tears appears in your eyes as you listen to the sound of your baby living. Growing happily and safely inside your stomach. Even though you’d logically known that you’re growing a life inside you, it apparently had never properly clicked until this moment.

Looking at Taehyung, you note with fascination the tears in his own eyes as well. When his gaze catches yours, he gives you his brilliant smile before reaching out and wiping away your own tears. “Wow. My best friend is really going to be a mommy.”

The sheer love and adoration on his face and in his voice makes you choke up, causing you to look at the sonographer instead. He smiles at the two of you before going on to explain some more things to you and you listen intently.

Once he’s about to finish, you finally get the courage to ask shyly. “Can I get a picture?” He nods and presses a button on the screen, letting you know that you can pick it up at the reception desk.

After that, it’s simply a case of wiping your belly clean before making yourself look presentable again. You thank the sonographer once more before leaving to the reception, stopping by the desk where the happy receptionist brings out your picture.

She hands it to you, letting you see the black and white representation of your child and you hold it like the world’s most important treasure. It’s only from the corner of your eye that you notice her give Taehyung one as well, and his raised brows say the question for him.

“One for mommy and one for daddy.” She says with a bright, customer friendly smile. Taehyung opens his mouth to correct her but you rest your hand on his elbow, shaking your head slightly. He frowns in confusion before acknowledging your request.

As you leave, he looks at you quizzically and you just give him a soft smile. “I think the guy who’s taking on such an important role should get to keep a picture right?” Pushing away from him, you head towards your car and unlock it. You completely miss the way he grips the picture tighter and takes a shaky breath.

At week 15, you’ve developed a small bump that is beginning to become visible to everyone. Taehyung had been beyond excited when he realised, and you found it strange to see your stomach slowly expanding. The tightness of your jeans was particularly unwanted though, and you dreaded having to buy a whole new wardrobe just to accommodate your pregnant body.

Today, you’d gone grocery shopping to fill the cupboards that were becoming rapidly depleted. Taehyung had come along to make sure you were getting the right stuff, he meant well truly, and he’d dragged Jimin along, ruining their weekly gaming night.

Jimin had been shocked at finding out about your unplanned pregnancy, but had shown his own best friend colours by telling you that he’d be there for you if needed. It made you want to cry sometimes when you thought about how lucky you were to have such phenomenal friends.

But right now, Jimin was kind of being a bad friend by trying to convince you to buy junk food. Normally, you ate pretty healthily and only indulged in things on the odd occasion. However you currently had Jimin wrapped around your frame to point out the bags of chips that lined the shelves, or the bars of chocolate opposite.

“Come on. You’re eating for two right? So what does it matter?” He whines at you, making you wonder whether he was wanting you to buy the snacks for yourself or so he could steal them. Raising a brow at him, you shake your head with a smile as you grab a jumbo bag of Doritos and place it into the cart.

“For you, greedy. I’m not at the stage of craving things yet. At least I think.” You muse, wondering when exactly that is supposed to start. As far as you were aware, you hadn’t experienced any but you were almost hoping to later on. What’s a pregnancy without getting some sort of craving right?

Jimin snickers however, following along with that loping swagger of his. It’s almost unfair how beautiful Taehyung and him are, and you eye him for a moment. Skin tight black jeans adorn his defined thighs while a stylish black leather jacket is draped over his shoulders, topping a white shirt while a maroon beanie is placed over his dark hair.

He’s always been the most stylish mother fucker in the room, and you desperately wish you could have his fashion sense. Unfortunately, it comes with a few thousand dollar price tag and you most definitely can’t afford that. Particularly now.

Turning around the aisle, you stop as you spy Taehyung stood further down as he looks between the two bottles in his hand. The sign above says that this is the nutrition aisle, and you watch with a fond smile at the frown of concentration on his brow.

Jimin pauses next to you, dumping the bag of gummy bears he’d picked up into the cart before looking at Taehyung as well. Smiling softly, he lets out a breathy laugh as he slings an arm over your shoulders.

“You know, he’s really excited about all this. More excited than I think he should be.” He murmurs quietly, so as not to bring attention to the both of you. Looking up at him, your brows dip together questioningly.

“What do you mean?” His face becomes serious and you feel your stomach flip at the sight. Jimin is the person who knows Taehyung the best outside of you, and in ways that only guys can know. Despite being best friends for so long, there’s some things that you and Tae have never discussed.

“Just...be careful with him okay? You know Taehyung. He feels strongly in ways people normally don’t. He’s...you know he’s going to get attached. Hell, he keeps that ultrasound picture in his wallet.” Running your hand over your stomach, you stroke the bump that contains your teeny, tiny baby and ruminate over Jimin’s words.

Taehyung has always loved deeply and strongly. It’s what makes him the perfect best friend as he’s so unbelievably loyal, but it also means he gets hurt so easily. You’ve lost count of the partners he’s fallen for that have broken this special soul.

“I’m not...I’m not going to leave him or anything. I mean...not that we’re in a relationship,” You flush at that, even though it’s a question you both deflect often. But it feels a bit awkward now. “He’s my best friend Jimin, I’m not just going to abandon him. Especially not now. I...god I hate to admit it, but I need him.”

Jimin smiles brightly before pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I know. But...be careful okay? You deserve happiness, and if a guy comes along and makes you happy then I’ll support that. But Tae...it’ll be hard for him to let you and the baby go in that case. Look at him. He’s acting like a dad, not a BFF.”

You stand in shocked silence at that, turning back to Tae who finally spots you both. Immediately, a brilliant smile takes over his face as he holds up the bottles. “Which one do you think you should have? Both have all the nutrients you need…”

He continues on and you simply watch him, feeling Jimin’s warmth next to you and anchoring you in the present. “I get what you mean Jimin, but he’s not stupid. He knows the lines. Maybe I’m being selfish but...I guess I’m glad someone is willing to act like a dad, you know?”

Walking forwards, you leave Jimin to watch you both as you take both bottles from Taehyung’s hands and read the labels yourself. You don’t see the way Jimin’s gaze trains on the both of you, focusing on the way Taehyung’s hand rests on your lower back while you almost lean into him.

He’s well aware that the two of you harbour no romantic feelings towards each other right now, and yet if anyone looked right now, they’d think exactly that. A boyfriend, being caring and supportive towards his pregnant girlfriend. “Oh Tae. Please don’t get too hurt.”

Looking over the ante-natal class acceptance email, you carefully input the class details into your shared calendar with Taehyung. He’d found a whole list of classes that would suit you and were at times that both you and he could attend. It had taken a quick query to get some dates confirmed, but you were pleased that you’d sorted that out before it would become impossible.

You seemed to have pregnancy brain lately, which often meant you’d forget the simplest things. It was incredibly annoying, even if it made Taehyung chuckle.

The classes weren’t going to be until towards the latter half of your pregnancy, giving you plenty of time to get prepared and research on what you could expect from them. Leaning back in your chair, you let out a deep breath and wince while rubbing your lower back slowly, hating the backache you seem to be plagued with lately.

The nausea had vanished a few weeks ago, but now you seemed to be reaping the bad sides of growing another human inside you with the almost constant backache. Not to mention your boobs that were growing. Some guys might think that’s great, but it just seemed to be adding to the aches and pains you were getting.

And you were going to have to buy new bras dammit!

But overall, things were going pretty well. You’d had another ultrasound last week at 16 weeks and had been given the all clear once more. Taehyung had wondered if you would try to find out the sex, but you were determined for it to be a surprise. What if they told you and it turned out to be wrong?

The door slamming closed distracts you from your laptop and you roll your head on the back of the couch to watch for Taehyung walking in. He does so quickly, with a bag in his hands and you’re momentarily reminded of when you’d told him. This time, he’s actually wearing a pair of jeans along with a white button up shirt but it’s the carton of ice cream in his hands that you care about most.

Reaching out, you perform grabby hands and he chuckles lightly as he flops onto the cushion next to you, one leg curled up under the other. Holding it in front of your face, he dances it for a few moments before placing it into your hands with the spoon he’d grabbed from the kitchen.

“You’re lucky. That’s the last Chunky Monkey they had in the store.” He says, a boyish smile taking over his face while his eyes crinkle in happiness as you delve into it. Leaning into your space, you watch as his blonde locks take up your field of vision while he takes a look at your laptop screen.

“Oooh, the classes are booked?” He takes the laptop from you and scrolls through the calendar before clicking onto the email. You shuffle closer to him and lean against his solid arm, resting your head on his warm shoulder while you continue to spoon ice cream into your mouth.

“This is good, I can work around these for you. Oh, and your mom called me because apparently someone’s phone died?” He teases, wrapping an arm around your own shoulders before he pokes at your ribs gently. You wriggle and pout, eyes flickering to the black screen of your smartphone on the coffee table.

“She wants to know if we’re going to theirs for dinner on Sunday. I think they want to get baby updates too or something, I don’t know. Or maybe she just wants to see my handsome face. And we can see my parents too!” He grins cheekily, placing one hand on his face in half a flowerboy pose.

Laughing, you nod in acknowledgement and watch as he begins to text your mom one handed. Your parents love Taehyung, and they’d been both happy and unbelievably choked up when they’d found out he was stepping up where Jin had failed. His own parents had been an odd mix of pride that he was such a good person and trepidation at the fact he was willingly giving up a lot for you. Which was understandable.

Given they still lived next to each other, it was only logical that you could both see your parents while giving them baby updates. You knew that Tae had excitedly sent pictures of the ultrasound to his parents.

Jimin’s words from weeks ago pass through your mind as you watch him play on his phone quietly and a hint of a frown touches your brows. Given how close Taehyung was being to this pregnancy, were his parents confused as to whether they should feel closer to you and the baby? Or were they just ignoring it and hoping their son wouldn’t throw his life away too?

“We should decide on the nursery by the way. I mean...we don’t have actually have space in this place for one. We’ve only got our bedrooms so...what do we do? Do you want to look for somewhere new?” He asks suddenly, dropping his phone into his lap while shifting slightly to look at you.

He’s close at this point, with his warm, chocolate eyes focused firmly on you. His wispy blonde hair covers the dark, serious brows and without even thinking you move his hair away to let them free. Taehyung’s always had a strong brow, and it’s almost frightening how he changes from cute with a fringe to walking sex when his forehead is free.

It was his go to look when he was going out and there’s a bizarre moment where you wonder what Taehyung’s child would look like. He has a superior bone structure, and you wondered if his kids would inherit it as well. There’s almost a slight pang in your heart at the knowledge your baby won’t have it.

Shaking your head, you look away from his serious gaze and rest your palm against your racing heart, wondering why you’re getting those weird thoughts and feelings.

“Err...no. We can’t afford a place with three rooms. Not without getting another job. And I’m going to be on maternity so we’ll be earning even less. I think this is probably the most we can afford. I can just...put the crib in my room.” Taehyung looks at your closely with raised brows.

“Really? Your baby is going to need space on its own at some point. Kids need their own space. And parents definitely need their own. You can take my room, I’ll just...use the couch until we can get a bigger place.” He offers and you recoil, appalled that he could be okay with the idea of sleeping on the couch for months on end.

“No way! You can’t give up your room Tae! How is that fair?” You pout at him, nuzzling your head into his neck. He laughs quietly and rubs your shoulder gently, pressing his nose into your hair.

“Okay...compromise then. We get rid of my bed, we put two singles in my room. And we try to save money so that we can get a bigger place. No one sleeps on the couch. Sound good?” You stay quiet for a moment as the carton of ice cream makes your thigh almost numb from the cold, but you’re too busy drawing silly patterns on his own thigh.

“What about your love life? I’m sure they’re going to be real happy coming back to find another woman in your room and a baby in the apartment.” Taehyung snorts at that and lifts up your chin with the tips of his fingers, giving you a sardonic look.

“Do you genuinely think I’m going to get my dick wet in this apartment when your baby is here? No way. Eww…this is your baby’s home just as much as yours and mine. I’d never do that to you.” You scan his face and note how completely earnest his expression is. Whether that means he’s just not going to get laid, or he’s just not bringing them back, you feel an odd sense of gratitude towards him.

“Okay. We turn my room into a nursery. But we’ll sort your room out at a later point okay? I don’t think we really have the money to buy two single beds right now.” You murmur and he nods slowly, his fingers finding your own and twining with them slowly. Smiling, you bump your head against his shoulder as you admire his long and elegant fingers that dance with your own.

“Awesome. Can I decorate it?” Taehyung’s voice is quiet and deep, yet you can practically hear the excitement vibrating in it. Laughing lightly you nod, wondering what he’d be planning. He knew that you wanted it gender neutral, but that could encompass anything and Taehyung was a phenomenal artist himself.

Watching him as he begins to become even more animated than normal as he explains his ideas, hand gesturing while his eyes light up with inspiration. A soft smile paints itself onto your lips as you feel a completely sense of contentment and happiness wash over you.

Taehyung is always handsome, but when he talks about something he’s passionate about he becomes quite possibly the most beautiful man in the world.

A sudden influx of emotion tightens your lungs as you watch him and you frown, rubbing at your chest slowly before you feel little bubbles erupt in your stomach. Your hand moves down to your stomach idly until it happens again and you suddenly jerk in Taehyung’s arm, causing him to stop and look at you with an anxious frown.

“What is it? What’s wrong? Is it the baby?” The questions come thick and fast, peppered into the conversation like tiny bullets of worry and you shake your head slowly. Running your hand over your bump, you smile as you feel the slightest movement in your tummy and immediately grab his own to place it over your firm stomach.

“What are yo-...” He stops suddenly, eyes widening almost comically while his jaw drops. He obviously can’t feel it but you can tell that he understands what you’re feeling, as the little smattering of bubbles ignites in your stomach again. “Oh my god. Is that...is it moving?” Taehyung whispers reverently, looking at your expanding belly with a sense of wonder and awe.

You nod slowly, the smile spreading on your own face when he’s suddenly laughing out loud and his own grin taking over his whole face. “Oh my god! That’s so...I mean it...sweetheart that’s...oh my god!” He can’t even get his words out as he fingers stroke the soft skin of your hardened belly.

Anything you might say vanishes when he suddenly cups your face and begins to kiss all over, his soft lips pressing to your cheeks, your forehead, your temples and even your eyes in his excitement. The giggles you let out are high pitched and full of cheer as he does so, the two of you experiencing something intimate and heart warming.

As he wraps his arms around your neck and hugs you tightly, even more kisses being pressed to your hair, you feel a warm feeling of bliss take over your body as his embrace. At least you never have to worry about your baby being loved.

A ruckus by the door interrupts your sleep from where you’d been dozing on the couch and you jerk slightly, sluggishly pushing yourself up onto your elbow while rubbing at your eyes. At 30 weeks pregnant, you felt tired a lot and often end up napping wherever you were, which was exactly what had happened when you’d sat down to rest for a few moments.

Loud voices soon follow and you blink blearily as Taehyung enters the room, holding a big box while Jungkook and Jimin follow soon after with their arms laden with boxes and bags. For a moment, your eyes track their bulging biceps with intrigue, noting that they’re just wearing plain t-shirts today.

It’s only then that you realise they both look remarkably casual which has you frowning slightly. Running a hand over your stomach, you see that even Jimin is just wearing a pair of grey sweats that pair with his white shirt nicely. But it’s Taehyung’s exceptionally lazy look that has your brows raising in surprise.

“What are you doing?” You ask, pushing yourself up off the couch and heading over to them. A tiny little tapping in your belly lets you know that your baby currently has hiccups and you tap in response happily, giving a soft, secretive smile.

Glancing back up, you note Taehyung’s eyes focused on you intently for a moment, gaze on your hand before it flickers back up to your eyes. Immediately he’s beaming at you as he holds up the box in his hand.

“The crib arrived! I got the email this morning so I asked if these two were free so we can do the nursery now if that’s okay?” He asks, a brow quirking in question as his head tilts endearingly. Smiling at him, you nod happily.

Immediately, the three head into your room and you stand in the doorway as you watch. You’d cleared out your room a few days ago with Taehyung’s help. Okay, it was mainly Taehyung clearing it out for you while you directed him but still. It was pretty much empty and ready to be turned into the room for your baby.

For now, you were sharing a bed with Taehyung until you both scrounged up the money to buy single beds. You’d both done it plenty enough over the years that it wasn’t too weird, but he got a little squirmy at the idea of accidentally hurting the baby or something in his sleep.

If anything, all he’d done was end up wrapped around your body tightly as he slept. Every morning, you’d woken up to him touching you in some way. Whether it was curled around you, his front to your chest or simply with his hand resting on your stomach while he slept on his side. It was adorable and you spent a few minutes every morning, just enjoying the peaceful and calming experience.

“Okay, let’s build the crib first and then we’ll move it into the centre of the room and paint the walls yeah?” Jimin says, a hand on his hip as he looks around. Jungkook produces a bunch of painting tools from one of the bags before pulling out a tin of paint. Heading over, you take the tin and turn it in your hands, a pleased smile taking over at the soft yellow colour.

You’d both discussed what colour the nursery should be and it was pleasant to note he’d managed to pick the perfect colour that would be perfect for either a baby boy or a baby girl. Suddenly, Taehyung is bounding up to you and gently pushing you out, his hand running along the small of your back with soft movements.

“You need to leave, I don’t know what paint fumes will do to you or something. You keep getting sick from random smells so...maybe you could go take a walk or something?” Considering him for a moment, you sigh barely nodding and heading over to the entranceway. He goes with you and helps you into your shoes, tying up the laces before looking up at you with a big, gummy smile. “Be careful. I’ll text when we’re done.”

Taehyung closes the door behind you carefully and you stare at it for a moment before heading out, wondering where you could go for a few hours. Somewhere where there’s plenty of places to sit, as you often find yourself getting a little tired lately and you decide on the local farmers market.

It’s a small place that you’d both discovered a few months after moving in and it had been a true haven of cheap, yet good quality, vegetables and fruit that were cheaper than the supermarkets surprisingly. There were also stalls that sold handmade items of various styles, and it’s here that you discover an adorable fluffy blanket that you know would look perfect in the baby’s crib.

It’s a soft yellow with tiny fluffy kittens and puppies bounding around while little stars and moons dot the spaces inbetween them. You have basically zero willpower when you see it and find yourself handing over money immediately while the stall owner folds it and places it into a bag for you.

Another stall finds you buying a bunch of tiny kitten and puppy figurines that are stylised from wood and painted so carefully, figuring that you could decorate a dresser with them and another produces a cute mobile that will hang carefully. It’s a bunch of tiny planets and stars, and you like the idea of your baby being able to see stars when they wake up.

It’s only when you realise that your shoulders are aching from the weight of the bags that you wonder if you should head back. It’d taken you half an hour to walk here, and the prospect of walking back is daunting.

Glancing over to the food stalls, you bite your lip and decide that you’ll make the guys your famous tomato chilli pasta and garlic bread. You seemed to have avoided the heartburn that spicy food could apparently cause in pregnant women, and you had a sudden craving for the delicious looking, fresh chillies on display.

A quick visit to all the different stalls found you with even more bags, full of fresh vegetables and meat. With a satisfied smile, you walk back to your apartment with slow steps and an aching back. In fact, by the time you finally place the bags on the kitchen counter, you’re pressing on your back firmly with a wince.

“What are you doing! Oh my god! Did you walk the whole way here with those bags? Why didn’t you call me? Or call a taxi?!” Taehyung frets over you, his hands fluttering along your stomach before he’s rubbing at your back. You can’t even find it in yourself to get annoyed at his fussing when his hands feel so good and when he presses on a particular spot, you let out a soft moan as you lean back into him.

“I thought I’d be okay. But look! I got stuff for chilli pasta and look at all the cute baby things I bought.” You gush, pulling out the items one after another carefully. Immediately Taehyung is looking them all over, running his fingers over the soft blanket while he looks at the figures closely with an excited smile.

Wrapping his arms around your waist, he grins brightly as presses a kiss to your hair. “Oh my god! This is gonna match the nursery perfectly. Come and look! We’ve almost finished painting it and then Jungkook and I are gonna paint a mural or something on it.”

He tugs you over to the room by your hand, his fingers entwined with your own and you gape at the room with incredulous eyes. The once cream coloured walls are now a soft yellow that is cheerful and calming while the white crib Taehyung and you had picked out is fully built in the centre.

Running back to the kitchen, you come back and carefully place it onto the tiny mattress while Taehyung sets up the mobile at the edge. Once finished, you both step back while his arm wraps around your waist once more, the edges of his fingers rubbing along your bump lovingly as your heart clenches with emotion.

“It looks perfect Tae!” You whisper, hugging him as tightly as your belly will let you. The room stinks of paint and it makes you feel the slightest bit nauseous while you watch Jungkook put the finishing touches on the wall he’s painting.

The younger man has an endearing blob of yellow paint on his cheek and you giggle lightly at it before noting the prim and proper Jimin is currently daubed in paint all over his body. He stands up from where he’d been crouched before coming over and taking your hand with a friendly smile.

“Let’s go cook yeah? It stinks in here and I have no artistic skill.” He teases, sticking his tongue out at the other two as Jungkook gives him a sarcastic salute. In the kitchen, Jimin begins to take all the pots and pans that you’ll need to cook out from their hiding places before pulling the ingredients out of the bags.

You take over cutting the vegetables to make the sauce while he begins to cook the minced beef, turning it over to ensure it’s browning nicely. The atmosphere is quiet, yet you can feel a little tension in him for some reason.

“Is something wrong?” You ask quietly, voice a little unsure as to what his reaction is going to be. While he’d been nothing but supportive of you during your pregnancy, there had always been something about Jimin that made it feel like he wasn’t being approving.

He turns over the meat in silence before letting out a sigh so deep, his shoulders physically fall as he grips either side of the stove. “Yes. And no.” Is all he says and you frown in confusion, wondering what’s wrong with him.

Placing the knife in your hands down, you head over and placed a hand against his arm in worry, running your fingers along him reassuringly. “Is it anything I can help with?”

Jimin stays silent for a moment before letting out a slightly strained laugh, shaking his head until his hair falls into his eyes. You’re not sure what to say until he tips his head back, the lean column of his neck all you can see for a moment as he showcases an expanse of golden skin.

“You’re going to destroy him. You know that?” It’s said so quietly that you almost don’t hear and you have to lean forward, until you register the words. Stilling, you note that he looks at you with a combination of love and exasperation.

Jimin points at your stomach before his eyes track back up to yours, holding your gaze firmly. “That is something we are all excited for. Jungkook, me, your parents, your friends. But Taehyung especially. But that is not his child. And the more that you continue to let this happen, the more it is going to hurt him when something happens.”

You step back away from him in shock at that, a hand placed over your stomach protectively as your brows almost meet in your befuddlement. “What do you mean? Why? What would happen?”

He laughs lightly and shakes his head once more, turning to face you. “I saw you both. In here. The way he holds you. The way he looks at you. That is more than someone should be feeling for their friend, and it scares me for him. You’re not treating him like your best friend anymore. You’re treating him like the father of your child. You even let him pick the name for god’s sake.”

An instant flashback to the night that you’d presented him with the list of boy and girl names you’d decided on runs through your head. You’d spent weeks on the list, finally coming up with five each that could be used, but you were stuck after that.

“Here. What do you think about these names?” You ask, thrusting your phone screen in Taehyung’s face abruptly. He lets out a noise of disgruntlement when you interrupt his game but pauses amiably, taking the phone from you to read through them.

Once done, he looks at you with barely contained excitement, his eyes practically sparkling with happiness. “You’ve got a short list? Already?!”

At that, you playfully slap his arm. “What do you mean, already? I’m 29 weeks! There’s like...11 weeks left until the baby arrives, as long as it arrives on time and not early! Anyway, I can’t pick one out of those. I like them all. I could have any of them.” You mumble, leaning your head against his shoulder while you wrap your arms around his own arm.

The rumble of his laugh vibrates through to you and you can’t help but smile at the lovely sound. “Okay? So what do you want me to do?” He asks jovially, scrolling back to the top of the list of names and reading through them again.

For a moment, you say nothing and bite your lip as you let the background music of his game fill the silence between you both. Inhaling, you finally decide to just ask. “I want you to pick.”

Immediately, he stiffens in your arms before looking at you with eyes that are like plates. “What? You want me...to pick the name of your baby??” He asks, his voice laced with more than just a little incredulousness.

“Yeah. I mean. I know I’m going to be a single mom but...you’ve been with me through it all. Normally, it would be me deciding with the dad. But the dad doesn’t want to be here so...I want you to decide with me.” Taehyung is thrown for a loop as he looks back at the phone, staring at the names with new eyes.

“Eevee, sweetheart. That’s...that’s a big thing.” He sounds almost choked with emotion, the knowledge that you’d let him do something as big as choosing the name of your child. The name your child would likely have for its entire life.

Nuzzling your face into his neck, you press a gentle kiss to the soft skin there before smiling to yourself. “Yes it is. And I can’t think of anyone better than you, Kim Taehyung.”

You can’t see him, but you feel him swallowing thickly and you have no doubt that he’s probably got tears about to fall at your words. Your best friend has always been the sentimental type, and something like this is sure to get his waterworks going.

“Okay then...I pick…”

“Well...yeah. He’s been a huge help Jimin. That’s the least I could have done to thank him for being here for me.” You mutter, arms wrapping around yourself protectively. He notes your stance and sighs, reaching forward to bring you into his arms gently.

“I get that. I do. And he really is. But you...the two of have always been so close. Like, there’s no surprise that every relationship had issues because of your friendship. But this? This is a whole new level. You’re not acting like best friends anymore. You’re acting like two people who are very much in love with each other.” Recoiling at his words, you try to pull out of his arms only to find his hands resting on your shoulders firmly.

“Think. Think hard on this. Please. You need to decide if you’re in love with him because you genuinely love Kim Taehyung. And by that, I mean that you want to be with him romantically, build a life together because it sure as hell looks like you are now. Or...you need to decide if you just love the idea of a having a father for your child.” You succeed at breaking free from him at that point, moving away from him with a conflicted expression.

Opening your mouth to speak, he shakes his head firmly and points at you. “No. You need to listen. Someone needs to say something before it gets too much. I understand if you’re wanting a father. Jin abandoned you, and you’ve never really wanted to raise a kid alone. And Taehyung will be more than willing to be that father if you need him to be. But you have to consider him too. That man has feelings for you, that are not platonic and they are not sympathetic. Not anymore. He has feelings that have nothing to do with that baby.”

Turning to the vegetables you’re cutting, you frown deeply as tears slowly begin to fall down your face. The silence is almost deafening and your hand presses to your chest firmly, rubbing at the space where your heart clenches in a combination of pain and panic.

The warm presence of Jimin suddenly presses to your back as he wraps his arms around your front, resting his head against your own in a manner that’s surprisingly comforting despite his words. “Hey. I’m not saying it to hurt you. I’m saying it to make you realise. Taehyung has never wanted to date you, but I’m 99% positive he would’ve never said no either.”

Placing a hand over one of Jimin’s own, you rub at the soft skin quietly as your mind races to catch up with everything. Finally you speak, letting your voice crack slightly with emotion. “What if you’re wrong though? And he just wants to be a dad without the relationship drama?”

Jimin laughs behind you, his body jerking against your own while your hair blows from his breath. “Believe me. With the way he looks at you now, that’s not an issue. I just...need you to know. To think. What happens if he thinks of himself as the father of your child, only for you to find some guy who takes that position? He’s setting himself up for hurt, and I don’t want that. Just as much as I don’t want you to get hurt either. You both need to sort this out, before the baby arrives.”

Anything you might say after that vanishes as you hear the outraged yell of Jungkook from the nursery, followed quickly by the mischievous laughter of Taehyung. Your stomach bubbles slightly, the feeling nothing to do with your baby for once as you consider Jimin’s words.

Maybe it’s because you didn’t want to look at it, but you’d purposefully avoided the way you’d both become more intimate over the previous months. The way platonic, quick touches slowly became more and friendly gazes became longing glances. The way you’d become more intimate with each other without even realising, the cuddles and the innocent kisses on arms, hands, necks and temples.

Becoming friends with Taehyung had been incredibly easy, sliding into the best friend role with Taehyung had been the simplest thing in the world. You shouldn’t have been surprised that crossing that romantic line had also been as straightforward as everything else in your relationship.

Now, you just had to decide if you wanted to try and cross that finally boundary officially. To see if Taehyung really did have these feelings that Jimin thought he did. To see if he wanted to have you as more than just a friend. Even though you were pregnant with another man’s child, you had to find out if he wanted you and your child.

Ironically, even though you were preparing to bring a child into the world in a few weeks, you found that this was perhaps the scariest thing you would ever do.

It’s two weeks later that you finally pluck the courage to ask Taehyung on a date. But you’re so nervy and worried about his reaction, the possible reaction making you feel as queasy as you had during your morning sickness, that you’re half tempted to call it off.

To make it even worse, you were pretty sure that he had no idea that this was even a date. Which was probably because you’d just mumbled out a request for him to go to the movies with you and then have dinner. It felt unbelievably childish for someone who was 30, but you couldn’t think of anything better.

If anything, the movie would at least let you have a solid two hours to build up the courage to ask. Which is exactly what you’d done, letting him eat the entire bag of popcorn to himself. It couldn’t be that hard to confess you were in love with someone, surely?

‘Hey Tae, I know I’m knocked up with another man’s child, but do you want to be my boyfriend?’ No that’s dumb.

‘So, I think I’m in love with you and was wondering if you are too?’ Wow, presumptuous much?

‘Would you be my boyfriend?’ Jesus, what were you? Twelve?

“Hellooooo? Are we leaving? I’m pretty sure this film has no after-credits scenes.” Taehyung says, waving his hand in front of your face. It’s only then that you realise the film has finished and you’d been staring blankly at the screen as the credits roll up.

“Oh, err...sorry. Pregnancy brain.” You smile, waving a hand in the air as you thank the baby in your belly for the excuse. Following him out of the theatre, you have to work hard to regulate your breathing as your hands shake when you enter the restaurant you’d both decided on.

There’s a bit of a wait, and you sit on the complimentary couch while Taehyung goes to grab you both drinks. It’s a nice restaurant, not too fancy, and you’re pleased that no one seems to be judging you by the lack of wedding band and prominent bump.

Still though, you’re deep in your mind as you contemplate what to say to your best friend to possibly move your relationship forward, you’re paralysed by the fear that you could be wrong. What if he didn’t want to be with you? What if you make a fool of yourself so badly that he decides to move out?

What if it all goes wrong?

You’re so in your own head that you don’t even notice the person sitting next to you until he suddenly waves a hand in your face. It reminds you so much of Taehyung that you look up with a smile until you register the face with a slight curdling feeling in your stomach.

“Jin.” Is all you can say, as it’s all you can get out right then. You never expected to see him again, much less in this random restaurant. A hand rests protectively on your stomach as you lean away from him while you look for Taehyung a little desperately, wanting to get away from your ex as quickly as possible.

“Yeah. Wow, I didn’t expect to see you here. I’m here with a few work colleagues and just saw you. I mean...you’re pretty big now.” Immediately you’re scowling and he’s holding his hands up, cringing slightly. “I didn’t mean it badly. I just...you look good.”

You don’t respond and simply stay silent as you stare at him, wanting him to just go away and leave you alone. Jin had his chance, and he lost it. Even just the sight of him makes your stomach turn with anger, though part of you tracks over his face and wonders what part of him your child will get.

“I’m not looking to suddenly push myself into your life. I still...don’t want kids. And I know, I’m a dick.” He pauses and looks at you seriously. “I’ll pay my child support, just let me know when it’s born.”

Standing up abruptly, you look at him with a carefully blank expression despite the fire bubbling inside you. “I’m sorry Jin, I can’t do this right now. I just...not now.” You whisper, conflicted as to how you were supposed to feel. How on earth had you ever found this man attractive?

He was attractive, yes. But so was Taehyung. And Taehyung had the sweetest, most beautiful soul in the world to match it. Jin was just...he was wrong. Laughing slightly, you ignore Jin’s raised brow as you realise that you had almost walked blindly into a bad situation with Jin.

Once, you’d thought he might be the one. Now you knew that he wasn’t even on the list. You weren’t interested in causing an incident here with him though, and instead you turn round to find Taehyung.

To find him staring at you with wide eyes, and oddly hurt look on his face as his gaze flickers between you and the man sat behind you. Stepping forwards towards him for a moment, you reach out and watch as he places the drinks in his hands on a random table before moving over to you.

“Can we just leave? Let’s order takeout.” He mutters, taking your hand and leaving the restaurant quickly. You don’t even get chance to say anything to him as you follow him out, turning your head to watch as Jin follows your movements with a curiously satisfied expression.

“Tae...what’s wrong?” You ask, confusion riddled in your voice at his actions. You’ve not been his best friend for over 26 years for no reason, and you can tell that he’s upset over something. Though what, you have no idea.

He gives you no response until you’re both safely in your apartment again, you toeing off your shoes before sitting on the couch with a heavy exhale. Taehyung stands at the entrance and watches you quietly as your head hits the back, eyes closing as a wave of tiredness suddenly takes over.

You don’t hear him as he pads over, his sock laden feet ghosting over the floorboard, but you do feel him as the couch dips next to you. The atmosphere is oddly tense, and you recognise that it has nothing to do with your anxious, hopeful feelings. It has everything to do with whatever has annoyed Taehyung.

And it normally takes a lot to annoy Taehyung.

Opening your eyes slowly, you blink bearily before looking over at your best friend. He’d dyed his hair back to black a few weeks ago and it’s almost strange to see him with his natural hair now, the colouring making his skin glow even more.

In the soft lighting of the lamp that you’d turned on next to the couch, you look over his face with interest. He’d always been a handsome boy when you were younger, but he’d been gangly. It had only been in his late teen years that he’d finally filled into his face, and only in his twenties that he’d developed the manlier face he has now.

With an elegant, straight nose and astonishingly delicate facial structure, you often wonder in amazement how such a beautiful man could possibly be your best friend. Unsurprisingly, he’s had men and women lusting over him for years, and yet those soft, crescent eyes are always filled with such friendliness that they practically sparkle with personality.

For years, you’d acknowledged your best friends attractiveness with a detached sense, almost as if you could see his beauty but didn’t feel anything for him. You’d watch the guys and girls drool over him with amusement, feeling pride that he was desired by so many.

And yet, there had still remained a tiny part of you that had been intrigued by him. You’d never touched it, nor had you ever even considered it, as pursuing Taehyung would have meant the possibility of losing his friendship. What if you started dating and then it all went to crap?

No, Tae had remained in the friendzone and he’d kept you there too.

But maybe...maybe Jimin was right. And Taehyung would be open to a relationship with you. You were already so close, it wouldn’t take a huge amount to shuffle over that line. If the last few months had taught you anything, it was that you could rely on Taehyung when times were tough, and you wanted him to know that he could rely on you too.

Which was why you needed to help resolve whatever issue was upsetting him now. There was no way you could broach that you wanted to move further when he wasn’t happy.

Reaching forward, you take his hand gently between your own and rub at his fingers soothingly. He looks down at the movement blankly for a moment before a tiny smile takes over, almost sad, and it makes your heart hurt.

Shuffling over, you cuddle up to his shoulder while you massage the joints of his long fingers, the feel of his smooth skin pleasant underneath your fingertips. “What’s wrong TaeTae?” You kept your voice soft, with just a hint of cajoling underneath it to get him to answer, letting him know that you’re willing to be serious but just as playful if necessary.

He’s holding himself stiffly and he doesn’t respond, simply staring at your hands before letting out a sigh that sounds like he’s been holding the woes of the world on his shoulders. “It’s stupid.” He mumbles, shaking his head before running his hand over his face tiredly.

“Hey, if it’s worrying you then it’s not stupid. Tell me. You know that you can tell me anything.” Tae looks at you for a moment, his warm brown eyes focused firmly on you and you can see the conflict as he fights with himself. Hesitantly, he licks his lips before placing his other hand on yours.

“I’m sorry. I just...I ruined our night and I mean...it’s dumb. You don’t need this stress this late.” He eyes your stomach before returning his gaze to his hands, stroking his thumb over your fingers gently. Thankfully, you’re not too bloated today.

Shaking your own head, you pull a hand free to cup his cheeks, providing him with physical support. Looking deep into your eyes, he sighs before letting his head dip forward and you watch as his fringe hides his eyes.

“I’m sorry, again. I turned round and saw Jin and it was like...it was like...like I was watching everything I’d built up in my mind slip through my fingers.” His words are so quiet that you can barely hear, the deep timbre of his voice almost just a vibration underneath your touch.

Frowning deeply, you lean even closer into his space as you lift up his head, catching his gaze closely. “What do you mean? I don’t understand Tae…” You trail off, bewildered as to what he was talking about.

He watches you quietly before laughing almost sarcastically, moving a hand to rest against your firm stomach. Almost immediately, your baby kicks out and you watch as Taehyung’s hand moves with the tiny movement.

A happy smile takes over his face as he lets his fingers run over your stomach but you note the tears in his eyes. “When I said that I’d be there for you when Jin left...I meant it. But I meant it as a best friend. I didn’t want you to be alone. And I still think that. But it...I...my feeli-...”

Frustrated, he tugs at his hair as he leans forward, elbows resting on his knees and you simply watch for a moment, his silk shirt straining over his broad shoulders. A choked laugh leaves him before he turns back, irritation at things you can’t even understand etched into his face before he lifts one of your hands to his lips, kissing the back sweetly.

“Jimin was right. I’m an idiot. I didn’t mean to, but over these weeks with you...I’ve felt closer to you than I ever have. And this baby...god sweetheart...in my head, I feel like I’m the daddy. But seeing you with Jin tonight...made me realise I was wrong. That was just my fantasy and the reality is that I’m just your best friend.” Looking at you with earnest eyes, he ignores the tear that tracks down his cheek slowly.

“I’m not leaving you, and I’m not abandoning you. Not this close. I’m here for you in any way you need me. But...I have to take a step back Eevee, I do. Because I don’t feel like your best friend anymore, and I don’t think I want to be just your best friend anymore either. I want to be the guy you wake up with every day, not just now. I want to be the guy you hold hands with, hug and kiss. I want to be this baby’s daddy very much. But I’m not.” His voice cracks and you get the strongest urge to wrap your arms around him tightly.

“And seeing Jin. It made me realise how fragile this dumb fantasy is. Because it’s all just in my head. It’s not real. And some guy is going to come along, and love you and you will love them and they’ll take you and this baby. I’ll be left behind, and I can’t say a thing. I can’t do that sweetheart, I don’t think my heart could take losing you both like that. Not now. Not when I love you so much.” He looks down, avoiding your eyes as his lips quiver and you sit in stunned silence for a moment.

Taehyung...loves you? “You love me? Like...not as a best friend?” You whisper, nerves causing your leg to jump repeatedly. His cheeks flush in response as he nods his head.

“I mean I do, but...more. And it’s not because you’re pregnant. I’d have dated you at any time if you’d asked, but you never seemed interested. But now...god. You’re perfect you know? The way you smile when you’re reading a book you like, the way your eyes almost wrinkle when you’re laughing at the TV, the little snores you do while you sleep. How brave you’ve been during this whole pregnancy and how strong you are. It’s felt I’m falling in love with a goddess...untouchable.” He snorts slightly, running his fingers through his hair.

You stare at him for a moment, taking in the way his shoulders hunch almost protectively as he waits for the blow to both his ego and his feelings. And yet you feel like a weight has been lifted off yours, in fact for the first time in months you feel genuinely happy. Almost giddy with excitement.

Wiggling in your seat slightly, you note his incredulous look as he scans over your body before you’re cupping his cheeks and squishing until he looks 10 years younger. His strong brows come together as he gives you a ‘wtf?’ look but you can’t help yourself as you give him the biggest and brightest smile.

“You silly, beautiful, adorable, funny, charming and loveable man. I’ve spent two weeks fretting over how to tell you that I love you and ask you if you’d want to try a relationship with me and then you blurt this all out because you’re jealous! Oh TaeTae, baby, there’s been no one but you for the last few months. Probably the last few years if we’re being realistic but neither of us realised. I mean...I’m not exactly a great catch right now but...I’m more than happy to have you if you’re willing to have me and the interloper on board?” You say, starting out bold before ending shyly as you glance down at your expanded stomach.

Taehyung is silent beneath your hands, his mouth open between his smooshed cheeks while his eyes are as big as you’ve ever seen them. Taking your hands in his own, he gently tugs them off before leaning closer to you, his breath shaking.

“Seriously? Are you...you’re being serious right now? You’re not joking with me? You’re being 100% serious? Please don’t joke with me about this. Please.” He begs quietly, the words filled with longing and more than just a little want.

Nodding slowly, you sniffle through your tears and curse your damn hormones as his expression slowly morphs into one of shocked excitement. For a few seconds, neither of you moves before he’s grinning that oh so familiar boxy smile that’s been making your heart skip frantically lately.

His hands are shaking as they trail along your cheeks slowly, moving until he’s cupping you with such tenderness that you almost cry even harder. Moving closer, his nose brushes against yours gently before he whispers. “Is it okay if I kiss you?”

A tiny nod from you is all it takes for him to press his lips to yours lightly, the soft skin dancing over your own before he’s pulling away. You’d worried that kissing him might ruin the image you’d had in your head, that you might discover that you don’t love him and it was all just pregnancy filled hormones.

But kissing Taehyung feels like everything in the world has shifted ever so slightly and clicked into place. Tiny sparks of excitement fizzle in your veins at him and you want to sob at how much you love the feeling of kissing him. How it felt like every relationship up until now was just a starter and Taehyung was the comforting meal you’d been waiting for.

“That...felt really good. Right? It felt good for you too right?” He asks, slightly unsure of himself as tiny micro-expressions flitter over his face. Nodding at him, you bite your own lip before pushing forward and pressing a second kiss to his lips. He giggles at the sensation and you feel butterflies in your stomach, whether it’s from the emotion or your baby moving you don’t know, but you feel happy.

Slowly, carefully, as if you’re afraid that the slightest wrong move might break the connection that you’ve both made, you wrap your arms around his neck and pull his closer. He smells like Tae; like home, like happiness and you want him.

You want him as a friend, you want him as a father for your child, you want him as a romantic partner and you want him as a lover.

At the thought, a spark of desire sets alight in you and you squirm slightly from where Taehyung almost hovers over you on the couch. You haven’t had sex since Jin, and you haven’t felt very sexy but now you want Taehyung in ways you’d never thought you would.

Running your fingers along his neck and jawline, you nip at his lower lip teasingly as you pull away. Giving yourself enough space to speak, you stare deep into his chocolate eyes and watch as careful desire is reflected there, giving you the courage to make the next move.

Dragging your hands down his front, you reach the waistband of his trousers and press another kiss to his lips. “Do you want to…” You whisper, voice quiet with lust and thick with want. He hesitates for a moment, and sudden insecurity flashes through you.

Instantly, you’re pulling back and clenching your fists as your head shakes. “I’m sorry, I mean. I can wait, we can wait. I understand. I mean, you wouldn’t want to...with me. Now. With this, I mean...it’s another man’s baby and I’m big and it’s not attractive an-”

He presses a finger to your lips firmly, giving you a loving smile that’s just a tiny bit exasperated. “Please. Stop. I find you just as beautiful as I did before before you were pregnant. I don’t care that this baby isn’t mine, because it’s mine in my heart. And please, don’t think I ever find you unattractive. You are perfect and I love you. If you’ll let me, I would very much like to show you, how much I love you. Now, and for a long time in the future.”

Staring at him intently, you scan over the expression on his face to see if he’s being serious. And he is. You know Taehyung, you know when he’s lying. And he’s not. He’s being completely, 100% serious and your veins fizz with love for him.

“Okay. I trust you.”

5 Years Later

A loud shriek of boyish laughter followed by a deeper rumble lets you know that there’s fun being had in the house without you. Closing the door behind you slowly, a smile spreads over your lips involuntarily at that happy sound of your son and husband having fun.

Heading inside, you pass through the hallway and take note of the wedding photograph of Taehyung and you. He’d proposed two years ago and you’d accepted with excitement. It hadn’t been hugely romantic, in fact Jae-Chan had only just fallen asleep after a huge temper tantrum and the both of you had been exhausted.

Yet it had been romantic to you, the way he’d pulled you into his arms and cuddled up with you on the couch, his hand running along your back slowly as you’d both lay there shell shocked from yet another stinker of a tantrum. And then he’d just asked, plainly and honestly, if you would marry him. Of course, you’d said yes.

Smiling at the picture, you let your fingers trail over the frame lightly as you admired the tuxedo clad figure of Kim Taehyung as he grinned brightly, love written all over his face like an epic story that would be treasured thousands of years from now and the beautiful, ivory dress you’d chosen for your special day.

This photograph didn’t have Jae-Chan in, but the one in his bedroom did. As usual, that photo was chaotic with Jae-Chan shrieking with toddler excitement while Taehyung laughs and you smile at them both. It had been perfect, and you’d never wish for anything better.

Entering the living room, you lean against the door and simply watch them both for a moment. Jae-Chan was a bubbly and rambunctious five year old, with a love of animals that meant you kept getting asked for a dog every ten minutes. That wasn’t helped by Taehyung’s equally adorable puppy eyes, but you were restraining well. For now.

You were told frequently that he looked like you, and to the uninitiated they also commented on his resemblance to Taehyung. That amused you both, given that physically he reflected nothing of his daddy. If anything, he was bizarrely the spitting image of Jin.

But no one would ever guess that Taehyung was not Jae-Chan’s father when they got to know your son and his wonderful personality. He was caring, kind and loyal to a fault and even had a bunch of Taehyung’s cute quirks.

Right now, they were both painting on the floor, the floorboards covered in an old sheet, and your little boy giggled every time he painted on Taehyung. Currently, your husband was daubed in vibrant paint all over his body, and you sighed quietly as you wondered how long that would take to wash off.

Still, as you watched them both you found your heart clenching. Taehyung might not be Jae-Chan’s biological father, but he was his father in every way that mattered. And that was all that mattered to you.

Heading over, you knelt down next to Tae while ruffling Jae-Chan’s dark hair, grinning as he whined out a complaint. Pressing a kiss to Taehyung’s own head, you looked down at what they were painting.

Taehyung had some weird, abstract thing going on and you weren’t even attempting to guess what it was. He’d long ago stopped asking anyway. Sometimes, you just really couldn’t fake interest in stuff.

Jae-Chan however, had drawn a whole scene with your house and three figures outside. Giving him an overly exaggerated look of interest, you point to it with widened eyes. “Is that us Jae-Channie?”

He grins gummily, nodding his head as he adds the finishing touches on a dog. Taehyung looks up at you with amusement, pointing to the dog with a cute pout. “Mommy, he drew a dog as part of our family so I think we need one.”

Eyeing him, you kiss his forehead gently before grabbing the paintbrush that’s lying on the floor. “How about, instead of a dog. We have this?” You muse softly, painting a tiny fourth figure that you draw wrapped in a green blanket.

Taehyung stares at it confused before pointing. “You have terrible painting skills. Are you buying a gecko or something?” Chuckling, you shake your head before gesturing to the painting with a soft smile.

“No dog, but perhaps a fourth member might be good enough for you?” You stroke your flat stomach gently and watch as his confused eyes flicker down to your hand. He’s still for a moment before his expression opens up into one of pure shock.

“Oh my god. Are you? Are we? I’m gonna…” He trails off, unable to speak and you simply nod with a toothy grin.

The next thing you know, you’re tackled to the floor gently as Taehyung kisses all over your face happily while Jae-Chan squeals with laughter at his parents excitement.

Being friends with Kim Taehyung had been easy, becoming best friends had been simple and a natural progression. But becoming a family with Taehyung had been the best decision of your life, easily.

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clickairadio · 4 years

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CAIR 29: Interview Blake Nubar - Get A GRIP on Your Business Numbers

One simple hack to increase your revenue. In this episode we discuss how to increase your revenue through your business numbers.

Grant Hi everybody this is Grant Welcome to another episode of ClickAI Radio. In this episode, I have the opportunity to discuss with the infamous Blake nubar on how to get a grip on your business numbers.

Everybody, welcome to another episode of click AI radio. This is Grant Larsen, I cannot tell you how excited I am today to have a visitor here with me someone that I've been dying to interview for a long time. I have really admired this man and what he's done. Blake nubar.

Blake I appreciate you having me here, man. It's a pleasure. I'm ready to have some fun and and thanks for having me on the podcast.

Grant Thanks for taking the time to do this. You know, I've chased you for some time, right? Just keep trying to track you down wherever you are on the planet, right? Trying to get a moment of your time. But thanks so much for doing that. In fact, I was remembering the first time that I met you. I happen to actually be sitting right next to you, right. And it was at a funnel hacking live. And I think it might have been the first one that I ever went to. And I'm sitting next to you. And we're just chatting for a minute. And then you were so humble all sudden, they're like, Blake nubar, please come up to the front. They call yell, I'm like what the heck, you had won this award for everything you've done to the business. How cool is that?

Blake Yeah, it was wild, I would award the growth on that thing was insane. Actually, that was on the product. And that was really cool. And yeah, I remember sitting next to you specifically. And I was like, Wait, are you Steve's Dad?

And you're like, yeah, I'm Steve's dad. I'm like, man, he talks about you all the time. Like in such an awesome way. It's fine. Nice to meet you. So, ya know, collecting the first is my first time walking across stage getting the the two comma club award. And that was done with an online business that it was called the b2b formula. I was working with a guy named Brian page on that. We kind of started that thing from ground zero type thing. Brian had a he had a course out really. But you know, wasn't making sales didn't know what a funnel was. All that good stuff. And we kind of like teamed up, you know, and we found each other through this thing. We started building this thing out. And you know, next thing you know, by implementing funnels and getting the right traffic sources in place. We did a million dollars in 43 days with that offer. And we were there at that funnel hacking live collecting that award that was actually here in Orlando, Florida, I believe, which is funny enough, because it's back here again, this year in 2021. Which should be exciting. So yeah, that that was a it was an exhilarating experience. A lot of crazy stuff happened. But on all Yeah, crazy to like help grow a business like that.

Grant I think about how you got started, I've heard a little bit of your origin story. But could you just take a moment to talk about how did you get started into this? Yeah, so

Blake Um, that my whole online journey and my funnel journey is different. My funnel journey is probably more applicable for this. So I was working in the nine to five, I was working in a fitness company. And we were working on building out this certification program for people that want to become personal trainers. If you want to become a personal trainer, you had to pass this exam. It's just like a standardized thing that you have to do. I don't know if it varies from state to state, maybe it does, maybe it doesn't. But we're building out the certification. And we want to like really go all in on this thing. So we spent we like really transformed how a training program should be. And we like we finished this thing. Like, it was crazy worth like nine months on this thing. It was a ton of time, but it was it was awesome. I had like a mobile app. It was this book. It was an online program and like all 360 views and amazing product. And we go and I hand it over to the marketing department and I'm like, Hey guys, like we're ready to rock and roll and start selling this thing and I almost like hand over the torch and they just couldn't sell it. Like nothing was moving and I just remember getting frustrated cuz I'm like, hey, like, Why is this not working? Like I thought that's your job. You're supposed to like market this stuff now and they're like driving traffic to like a website just like nothing was working. And I remember go I went home one night. And I was like frustrated Of course and I'm sitting there it's like three in the morning. I'm staring at my ceiling fan. And on my laptop on my on my bed. So I just remember pulling it open and looking through it. And I see this ad Come up. And I just remember the ad it just said weird marketing experiments to increase traffic conversions and sales online. I'll never forget the saint of it. And it's this crazy guy on it. His name is Russell Brunson. I had no idea who he was. And he was just like, full of energy. So I clicked on this ad. And next thing I know, I went in in a sales funnel. I didn't know I was in a phone, I thought I was on a website. But lo and behold, I was in a sales funnel.

And it's basically Russell just being like, you want to grow a business online, you want to start a business, you need a funnel, you need a funnel, and he's like, going through all these different types of funnels. And I remember I was like, so intrigued by it. I was like, a 90 minute presentation, and I was so captivated. I remember, I watched it. Again, I watched it twice. So I watched this thing twice. It's like six in the morning, I go straight into the office, I started sketching out a funnel on the board, and the marketing department like, what are you doing, man? I'm like, I know how we're gonna sell this. We're gonna use a sales funnel, like, what's the sales funnel? And I'm like, I don't really know yet. But this guy Russell talks about it. And I think I think this is how we can sell this thing. So I start sketching this thing out. I call up one of our celebrity trainers, who is like the poster child of this brand new certification. I'm like, hey, so and so we need a webinar. Like I bought the perfect webinar stuff. I sent it over to him, he like records this webinar, he sends it back like a week later, I build my first funnel out ever inside of clickfunnels. I put this thing in, and I go to the marketing department say, Hey, guys, instead of like what you were doing, just drive traffic, I do what you do, but just send them to this thing here. And they're like, Alright, so they send people there. And people start often. And people start watching this thing, right? When we go deliver the offer. No one buys like not a single person purchase this thing. webinar ends, we're done. I go outside. I'm like, I'm like Kirsten to myself. I'm like, Oh, another fail What idea. And I remember how like one more last, like lackluster hope of trying to get this thing to work. And I walked back inside. And I just went to my computer and I clicked on the refresh button. And we made our first sale for like, it was like 797 bucks like $800. And I went nuts. And it's like I this Russell stuff works right funnels work. And I walked in the next day and I quit. And I set out on this journey for the for the next year of trying to understand how you know, basically the science of selling stuff online, like funnels and offers and messaging and all that good stuff. And the rest is history.

Grant One sale. That's amazing. That's it.

Blake There's no I think that's one thing I think a lot of us will relate to. And if you if you haven't relate to yet, you know, some people are watching and listening, they have it. The one thing I think a lot of people will tell you is that when you make your first ever sale online, whether it's $5 or 500, there's this feeling that happens where you just like there's no turning back, I want more of this experience again and again and again. Yeah,

Grant Yeah. I love that, that so so your secret sauce as a business owner, it sounds like it's a combination of things. One, you stuck with this clearly right? And it took lots of tries to do. But I've watched you build from that, because I've seen some of the things you've created since then, which is just incredible. I think you've really been perfecting the art of the launch the product launch. He talked about that for a moment. Yeah.

Blake So anytime you have a really creative idea, right? I'm never an advocate anymore. I used to be right of building it out first and then launch it. And I've kind of flipped that on its head. Now it's more like launch it first and then build it out. Because a lot of things that prohibit entrepreneurs from moving forward that stopped them in their tracks as they think they have to go build out these products and services first. And it's really difficult, right? There's a lot of friction in that. And almost it's like a recipe to fail and quit and give up and not want to do it again. So I'm more of a fan of See if you can go sell the idea that you have first and then go spend the time building it out. So anytime we have an idea, what we like to do is really go really hard in the paint, when it comes to launching because launching is definitely it's the way to prove your concept. It's the way that it gives you the short term capital to inject into building the process and fulfilling on it. And even putting more even gives you the capital you need to put into evergreen strategies like paid media and things like that. So we're just like what we do really well here my business partner and I is that we when it comes to a new idea, we really like to watch hard and aggressively like we like, we don't just like to send an email. We don't like to just make a Facebook post or a couple ads. Let's say we like to be the loudest people in the room where by the end of it, I'm hoping people look at me and like man, that Blake nubar dude, he's super annoying, because then I knew we did a good enough job because you couldn't escape us during that launch. So launching is one of those things where it's like, it's you got to become a master of it. Like you have to know how to do it. But you never want to stay in it. It's like learn how to launch and then learn how to move that stuff to the Evergreen model where it just keeps producing for your business day in and day out. So watching is it's it's something you have wasted you have to learn it you have to become really good at it and There's so many different types of launches you could do honestly, it's like, fall one of the frameworks and put your idea into that framework and then just see how it does and see if the markets willing to judge and pull out their credit cards to pay for it.

Grant Are there certain social media platforms that you tend to focus on for your launches? Yes, so we, I'm a fan of Facebook.

Blake I like have this love/hate relationship with Facebook, because it's like, as much as as great of a place it is, it's like you have very little control as an advertiser. So Facebook's a really good spot we enjoy. I think the all our biggest launch we've ever done was only by utilizing Facebook, which is crazy, right? It's just because Facebook to me is the hub. Like if you're on social media, you're on you have Facebook, on your phone, or you use Facebook, you might have the other ones too, you might have like tik tok and Instagram and all the other ones. But Facebook is definitely the core. So I'm like, Okay, let's focus on Facebook, which a reason behind that was a we didn't want to get overwhelmed. I didn't want to like every additional platform, you have to like fake have to. It's just more stuff you have to create. It's different type of content you have to create because the platforms have different ways of posting and stuff. So we're just like, let's do Facebook. That's our favorite. But now as we've expanded the business, and we've grown, we really focus on Facebook and Instagram, those are kind of the the two big honey holes, I would say when it comes to it. We do email marketing and things like that. But it's really Facebook and Instagram, because like I said, that's where every I mean, everyone's on Facebook, I mean, and you take it literal ticket, figuratively, the world's on Facebook. So what better platform to use, and the one where everyone's kind of congregating.

Grant Okay, that's awesome. So you know where you're going to find your people. So you grew this business and you become expert at launches and launches. And you got to a certain point in your business, there was some time or place or condition you got into Lake where it led you to reach out and try to track down someone like myself, what were those conditions?

Blake Yeah, so I remember, you know, the business was growing, we were doing really big revenue numbers. And I remember when I was working with Brian, right, previously, I remember, he had a consultant that was really advocate about understanding your data. And I didn't get it at first, I'm just like, What does any of this stuff mean? And as you really start to see, when your business grows, if you don't have a grip on the numbers, you're kind of in trouble. And I remember we were getting to a point where our revenues were, you know, high six figures every month. And I'm just over here. And I remember I think I reached out to I don't know, if I reached out to Steve, or Steve reached out to me. But I remember one instance happened in regards to conversations like, you need to talk to my dad. And I'm like, he knows this stuff. And he's, it seems like it's what he does. And I'm like, Okay, done deal. And the reason I reached out to you is because I realized that in order for your business to have a grip on it to have a pulse on what it's doing to scale it right with predictability. You're you have to understand these numbers, and especially having understanding numbers in a way where you can make really educated decisions based on that data. See, most entrepreneurs, when you're first getting started, you let your intuition guide your decisions. That's great. Like you have a gut reaction. Oh, this is a cool idea. Let's go watch it. But as that thing works, you need to use less intuition and more data to kind of guide where you want to go. Now, if you want to develop new products sure where your intuition run wild, right. But when you want to make really educated decisions on growing your company and what different verticals to go after what different traffic sources, it should no longer be this game of guessing right, which a lot of entrepreneurs start making the mistake of it's like I touched one thing it turned to gold, we think we can touch some more turns to gold. And it usually always backfires. It has to be the data. So I started thinking, Okay, I don't want to make that same mistake where it's like you think you're the end all be all, and everything you're gonna do is going to be magical. It's not, who can I contact that knows data because I'm staring at this stuff. And I it's like a foreign language. I'm like, looking at like, I don't even know, but I'm just staring at these. And I'm like, this is this way too much data here. And like, no one had a really easy way of organizing it so led me to contacting you. And that's kind of where things began.

Grant That freaked me out at first and I'm like, Oh, yeah, we're gonna do some AI on this. That just sound weird to you.

Blake Yeah, I was just like, you know, I've heard of AI before. And like my geeky brain can like understand it to an extent. But I'm like, I have no idea what you're talking about. Grant, just do your magic because this sounds crazy to me still.

Grant Alright, so it's important to you to understand your business numbers, like you said, so that you can figure out some predictability. It helps you what influenced some of your planning or your next like, if you don't know your numbers in your business, right?

Blake You can skate, you can look you can get to you can just run a start a successful business and grow it to an extent flying blind. Like you can do that. You could you know, you can get a little lucky. You can have something that's pretty stable. But if you really want to grow your business and you're wondering why you're capping out and everything, your tribes not working, there's a good chance you have no idea what your numbers are, right? So if you really there's I don't know another Way to scale a company then by really understanding your data, because when you understand your data, you know, what's converting what's working, what's not. And you can focus more energy on the things that are working and put more money behind those, hence, scaling those. And like kind of divesting out of things that aren't working so well. And the only way to do that is to really have a grip over the data inside of your business, which honestly, is probably the last thing entrepreneurs do, right? Because it's just so overwhelming. You just like the one thing you want to avoid. But I can't express at least in the last few months, how much I like realized how important it really is, to having a grip on it and what it can do for your business. It's the difference maker in your business.

Grant Okay, that's, that's awesome. So when you got started working with us, how much did you have to know about AI? That, were we shoving it down your throat? We're like, hey, learn logistic regression. Come on Blake.

Blake Great, I had no idea of anything you you you had, like, I knew nothing going into it. And I still didn't have to know that much. Because working with you, you're able to articulate the data in a way my brain my, you know, kindergarten brain could understand with pictures and awesome things like that. So going into it. No, I knew absolutely nothing. I didn't have to know anything, which was great. Because you knew exactly how that data worked. You knew how to show me and you basically just were withdrawal. You're like, this is what this means. I'm like, I understand that instead of me trying to figure out what to do. Or the guess is it literally taught you told me what, on this day or this time or after a holiday or before holiday or during this season? Or during this quarter? This is what you should do? and not do. I was like, I can understand that. So it was simple.

Grant So let me ask you about that in terms of ways to make something like this easier for a business owner. Now that you've gone through this experience, what would be some some tips that you would share with others to help them in their journey going through this?

Blake Yeah, just look, data is one of those things. Again, I can't stress it enough anymore. And I don't think many people geek out on it. Like, the thing is, always have a grip on your business when it comes to the numbers, because then you can have the ability to have someone like grant come in and help and help you and show you on what to do with those numbers. Right. Having those numbers is great. You might tell me all day, I know my conversions in my business. And I know, I know my opt in rate. And I know this grants the person that can tell you what that really means and what to do with it. And that's the difference. Because it's one thing, knowing about the numbers, the next is being able to take action on what that data means. And if you look at most things, right? There's every software on this planet will tell you numbers, right, here's your conversion rate, here's your OPT in rate, here's what won the split test. But there's another layer after that. And that was like that was what I was really impressed working with you is that you were the second layer, you were the the team that came in, I was like, Hey, this is what this means. That's great. But this is what it means to do with it. So I would advise anyone, that's whether you're just getting going or you're looking to grow your business, start to get a little grip on your numbers, because then you're able to, you know, work with someone as amazing as grant to help you really scale those numbers by making those decisions.

Grant Blake, you've been more than generous with your time with us today. I really appreciate that. Thank you so much for doing this. Any final tips or comments to people who are starting to grow their business? Yeah, so starting to grow your business, always make sure a I'll start from the beginning, you're gonna solve a big problem, right?

Blake Find a big problem, if you find out that you're capping a lot, right? There could be a lot of reasons, like I said, data could be one of them. But just remember, like, solve really big problems, right? Because then it's gonna give you room to grow. And as you start growing, get a real grip on those numbers. Because seriously, there's no other way to scale. You can't scale a business without that predictability. And having that predictability is going to give you the chance to grow your business on a whole new level. Again, understanding what those is and work yourself like grant or some this AI technology. That's absolutely amazing, right? It tells you exactly what to do in order to make those decisions. So no longer do you have to guess anymore. I mean, we've been guessing our whole lives as marketers with split testing and things like that. It's amazing to know that you can go into situations right where the data is, this is kind of how this is how it works. And these are the these are the ways you need to react based on that on on all that information. So that's my final words. I know it's more like this is the geek mind going but solve big problems, get a grip on your numbers and then find a way to take that those numbers and use them to make those decisions to grow your business on a whole new level.

Grant Hey, thanks again, Blake for joining us. And thanks everyone for listening in. Until next time, get a grip on your numbers.

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