#its ok peepaw lets get you back to bed

[iidgm]

Follow up, he has a weak heart (old) and a weak heart (given a gift by a child)

the way roxie could have been charged with critter manslaughter and sent to critter prison just for that gift . . .

[slasherhoe87]

we need more of old man Myers ☹

Yes, dear Anon, we do! Which is why I'm going to write these headcanons for all of us.

Peepaw Myers x GN Reader

👨🏻‍🦳WHAT IT'S LIKE LIVING WITH PEEPAW MICHAEL MYERS👨🏻‍🦳:

Peepaw never speaks - ever. The only noises that pass through his easily bruised lips (DON'T give him corn on the cob again!) on a regular basis are grunts and grumbles

Leaves the toilet seat up

Misses most of the time too - expect to find urine on the seat lid and the wall behind the toilet

Never wears his work boots anymore - even on hunts.

Peepaw doesn't give a shit anymore and wears his slippers and bathrobe over his coveralls all the time, even when out killing

Its certainly a sight when he comes back home in the wee hours of the morning, his blue and green tartan slippers tracking blood through the kitchen, bathrobe swaying gently behind him

Sits on the porch in your grandma's old rocking chair most of the day eating soft candies just waiting to scare off pesky kids who dare to put one toe on the lawn

Technology is the devil

Holds the cellphone you bought for him like its going to eat him alive

Only replies with 👍🏻 and 'ok' when you send him a text

Thinks modern horror films are garbage and lack the charm and suspense the superior older ones had

Naps regularly throughout the day. Either in the rocking chair on the porch or the recliner in the living room

He's dying for a nice steak but his poor teeth just can't handle it.

Generally doesn't drink but enjoys a small bourbon or brandy some nights before bed

Takes up most of the bed and hogs the duvet

Stares longingly at the harder candies - especially candy corn at the store before you pull him away and guide him to the softer candies

Backseat driver

Feeds all the stray cats at the nearby park

Chases away all the dogs

Complains at the prices of everything

Gives waiters/waitresses and cashiers the stink eye because of this even though its not their fault

Has a picture of Laurie behind the side door of the garage and throws darts at it

Your threaten to send him to Sunny Meadows nursing home when he gets too difficult

Will try and fix something before you buy a new one

Likes rock 'n' roll and classic metal

Thinks modern music is trash and soulless noise

Likes to take late afternoon strolls with you in the park while holding hands

Doesn't own a single pair of underwear - he's commando all day every day

Refuses to go the doctors for anything

You end up bribing him with making his favourite pie: strawberry and rhubarb

Gives you the reins more often in the bedroom than he used to

Happy to lie on his aching back at let you do the work (he wouldn't even dream of letting you be so in charge a few years prior)

Enjoys soft love making more than he used to

Likes drinking your homemade sweet tea and lemonade on the porch

Will pinch your bottom every time he walks past you

Likes to crack his knuckles

Wants to murder your neighbor (she's a clone of Corey Cunningham's mother)

Hates loud parties. Will go to the offending house and cut their power before walking back home with a satisfied smile

Likes cuddling with you in bed and peppering your neck and cheek with chaste kisses

I could go on and on really. But anyway, hope you enjoy! 🎃❤

[desiresign]

mike is funny to me as touhou character sorry because bro was like hmm today i shall very briefly touch upon colorism in a characters backstory...WITH AN KITTY CAT! and its like ok peepaw lets get you back to bed

[alldeadallbread]

sorry guys im turning peepaw into a slur. if i call you peepaw know its with rage and malice and evil intent