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royalsunshinehotel · 3 years

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"one more time” (jay menha x f!reader)

@dickacorn @idealfigment @hecuba-of-troy

Warnings: YN scraped the HELL out of their knee, other than that it’s just smut. The stutter in this fic is a reference to @umbrielchip000

EMOTIONAL JAY???? SMUT??? YEAH!

You had made a habit of studying your travelling companion, and he knew this. Jay had several emotions he kept muted, but after weeks of knowing each other, one finally broke through to full volume.

Jay’s pissed off. You’ve never seen him pissed off before.

All you had done was fallen up the stairs. You’d had skinned knees before. What was he so mad about.

This was a good thing. He picked you up like a bride and carried you the rest of the 2 flights. You get carried, and you get to feel him, it’s a win.

But now he’s dabbing alcohol onto your disturbingly bloody knee. He’s pissed off.

Reflexively you take a grip on the counter and try to figure out if you should focus on his large, warm, hands, or if you need to be responsible and remember why you're in this position.

“Jay. I’m fine.” You protest as he stares at the offending leg. You keep your hand on the hem of your yellow dress, toying with it to distract yourself.

“Your knee says otherwise.” He replies flatly, hitting a spot that makes you hiss.

“I’ve scraped my knee before.” He huffs, getting gauze out of his kit.

“Why are you mad?” Your exasperated tone makes his whole face shift.

“I’m n-not.” Jay chokes out. His eyes are round, like he almost was shocked with what he just said.

He had a stutter as a kid. Was that it?

He just stuttered in front of you. A warm flower blooms in your chest, and you take advantage of his shock. You’d worked so hard on maintaining a level of trust with him. Jay doesn’t tell people anything, only his name if they’re lucky, and you’d gotten that AND minimal information about his childhood. Your next move was vital.

...

You reach up and kiss him.

Jay inhales sharply before you reach his lips.

He’s stiff, and his beard is soft. The feel of having him so close sends goosebumps across your skin. He tastes like the croissant you’d force-fed him earlier. Jay eats like a bird.

He positions himself between your legs and you let out a sigh as you feel the scratch of his jeans.

“One more time.” You ask lightly.

“I-I-” He tries, mind trying to catch up with his mouth. He thinks for a moment, about a time where his mother explained his stutter by telling him he “had too much to say.” You're not laughing, you haven’t pitied him. You’re hearing his stutter, and you like it.

“Beautiful.” You look at him and press a firmer kiss into his mouth, when he doesn’t pull away, you pepper his whole face.

He’s smiling when you pull back. That’s a good sign. Maybe you shouldn’t push it.

Jay slowly reaches behind your bandaged knee and raises it up. He presses a kiss into the bandage. You were holding your breath and he knows it.

Your sending shocks into his hand and you have no idea.

He’s in love with you.

Fuck.

His words are gone. He hates when he gets like this. All he can do now is keep kissing you. You're digging your nails into his shoulders and he hopes you leave a mark.

“Jay.”

You plant another small peck on the corner of his mouth, not quite sure what to do when his eyes close. Jay couldn’t do this, he needed to stop. He knew how he felt for you, but you were far too dangerous for his peace of mind.

Against his better judgement, he reaches a large hand to the side of your neck, not allowing you to pull back.

You feel good, so good.

You feel correct somehow, in a way that was totally foreign. He had the growing feeling if he took you right there against the counter, you’d feel even more correct. You’d fit underneath him and around him perfectly.

But he can’t think like that.

The dynamic the two of you had built was delicate, but it's something he’d tried his best to maintain. He’s been traveling with a stranger for months, and you didn’t want to get involved with the likes of him anyway.

He shakes for a moment, halting his movement, trying to release his grip on you, but he can’t.

You’re surprised, pleasantly so, that he was being soft. You were expecting something more firm, even harsh, but he wasn’t. Firm maybe, but not harsh. You’d definitely noticed how large his hands were, but now that he had you in his grasp, you appreciate them even more.

You let out a low whine as Jay licks a warm stripe up your neck before starting in on your jaw. After you’d gone out of your way to keep everyone at arm's length, and here you are, wrapped around someone, hoping he’d take you apart.

“So much for that,” you think to yourself.

You take his hands, and place them on your thighs, hoping that he’d take the hint, as you currently couldn’t for a full sentence. He takes advantage of the opportunity, pulling you closer.

He groans inwardly at his actions. Jay should let you go, you’re shaking in his grasp. He should make you go lay down. Alone. This is ridiculous.

He should say something, but he doesn’t. He just lets his hands wander up your legs, brain clearing when he doesn’t feel anything.

You didn’t have anything on underneath your dress.

The breath he’d been holding leaves his lungs in a gust, because what the hell was he supposed to do about that? He can feel your lips on his neck, working desperately. He needs to match you, he needs to keep up.

He’s running his hands everywhere. You're so soft, he’s losing his mind.

You brace yourself against the counter, cursing internally that you can’t hook your injured knee around him. You have a fist in his hair, and he’s got you completely suspended. You don’t mind.

You trust Jay. You always have. And now you know he trusts you.

You kiss him again, clearing his head. Jay kept his face neutral, trying to be cold, but his eyes couldn’t hide what he was feeling. He couldn’t take his eyes off you, but he’s scared.

You know. You always do.

It wasn’t fair of you to look at him like that. You fit so perfectly in his hands, it made him lightheaded. If he didn’t pull away soon it wouldn’t be good for either of you.

You take a half-step forward, humming absentmindedly as you toy with the hem of that sky-blue shirt you love so much. You move one of his hands to your rear and start sucking at his neck. You feel his skin getting hot underneath your touch.

He’s not pushing you off, or running away, or worse- yelling, so you take his shirt off, happy to be rid of the soft fabric.

Your mouth goes dry seeking him like this. He’s quite stunning.

You’re soaked, and warm. All he can do his groan, dropping his forehead against your shoulder, his grip on your thigh starts to dig, pulling you closer.

Jay drags a damp finger over your slit, trying to reconcile how wet you were for him as you rock against his palm. He’s in awe of the fact you’re nearly crying as he rubs the pads of his fingers over your clit. Your thighs shiver, inching closer to him if that was possible.

God he’s freezing, he’s trying to stop his own teeth from chattering.

“Didn’t know yo-you’d be like this-this,” you gasp raggedly into his ear because even though he’s got two painfully long fingers inside of you, this could still be a hallucination.

He feels the same.

You tell him, rasping into his ear how good he is, how much you love his fingers, how you’ve been dying for this. He’s gritting his teeth, trying to keep it together.

Jay feels you jerk suddenly, taking your hand, your arm stiff on the counter, and planting it around his neck. Your other arm follows. You brace yourself with a tight grip on his hair as your hips bear down against his long fingers. In spite of yourself, you squeak when the arm he has wrapped around you crushes you tighter against him.

You're able to feel the ridges of his knuckles while your ears start to ring and your heart pounds in your head. Your eyes well up. You already feel so good.

You want more.

What if he doesn’t? Jay gave you nothing personal about himself, and you’re still here against a kitchen counter, with him. What if he just called it a night and went to his room? It still wouldn’t hurt to ask.

Yet as soon as you open your mouth, the only thing that comes out is a whine because Jay’s pressing the heel of his hand against your public bone while his fingers proceed to work. He’s grinding your clit against his hand, making your heart skip.

Where the fuck did he learn this?

You can feel the bridge of his sharp nose pressing into the soft skin between your jaw and your ear. His breath huffs over your skin, and it’s the last straw.

You clamp down on his hand and your mouth opens, gasping for air. You hear Jay moan in your ear. He presses you harder against the counter, and his hand stills, keeping his pressure tight.

He curls his fingers ever-so-slightly, and tears form in your eyes.

Jay doesn’t notice how your nails are digging into his wrist, and the hand you have in his hair is slipping, but still holding on.

You just want to pull him closer as your hips stutter and grind into his palm.

You don’t realize you’ve started speaking until the ringing clears.

“Jay, please. I just-” He sighs and looks down, pressing his forehead against yours in spite of himself. He’s going to walk away, but then he looks back at you, his logic fading. You tug firmly at his belt. He’s going to walk away.

“I need you, Please,” you sound as destroyed as you feel. Jay can’t handle it. He’s going to go to his room and not think about how easy it would be to take you with him.

But he does. Jay’s melting for you, and you know it. You love it.

The next thing you clearly remember is being plopped down on Jay’s mattress, hair fanned out behind you.

Jay’s doing his best to ignore how you’re biting at his ears.

He’s going to stop, and send you to your own room, right? He’s going to turn you away. It’s the best choice for the both of you, things were going to get complicated.

You hear the clanging of Jay’s belt come undone and smile to yourself as his beard brushes your face. A blunt pressure hits your slippery folds and you could just cry.

Jay and you had been in a standoff for some time, and today was the day it finally ended.

You give him a soft peck, gripping him as he pushes up into you. He catches your gasp in his mouth like he’s hungry.

“Just right,” he thinks, not recognizing the dig of your nails into his back.

Even when you're completely at his mercy, you’re still the one overwhelming him. He was right about having you underneath him, It’s all too good. He gives you a soft kiss on your jaw while you adjust.

You let out a pathetic whimper, testing Jay’s patience. His hands are determined to touch every part of you he can, and he just…

“You're so sweet, baby.” You rasp into his ear, slowly grinding forward. You hear him groan as your nails graze his scalp, grip on his hair firm. Jay lets out a sound somewhere between a groan and a growl, and you’ve got a mental list going of how you can use this again.

“C-Call me that again.” Your heart skips. You feel Jay shiver above you as you tap his shoulder lightly. He pulls back, leaning into the hand you put up by his face.

“Baby.” You sigh. Jay doesn’t shiver. You’d been travelling together for three months, and he’d barely caught a cold.

“What was that?”

“What?” He replies, you narrow your eyes at him. Your hazy brain clumsily puts pieces together.

“Do you like when I talk nice to you?” His face gets warm in your hand.

“F-Fuck.” He says, pressing a kiss into your wrist.

“I think you’re pretty.” You sigh. It’s an understatement. He’s beautiful, completely wrapped around you, curly hair pushed forward. His beard is sticking up haphazardly. His pupils are blown wide as he looks at you, leaning down for a searing kiss.

His breath against you is torture. He knows it.

“I'm s-supposed to tell you that.”

“I know.” He hits an angle that makes stars appear behind your eyelids, and he doesn’t let up. You feel him twitch as your breathing gets thin in his ear.

“How’s that?” He asks, clearly knowing the answer.

“Perfect. More please.” Your arching your back, grinding to get closer to him. He presses a kiss into your collarbone, loving how you wrinkle your nose in response.

Jay rolls himself, hitting as far as he could when he halts. He grabs your face to meet his. Your eyes flutter open, hair standing on end when he takes one of your hands from his back and places it on your stomach.

The praise you were giving him earlier was gone, only because your mind had completely cleared. All you can recall next is a question. A lovely question.

“H-Harder, Jannu?” Jay looks down to see your eyes tightly shut.

“Yes, please.” He quickly takes a leg from around his waist, and holds it down flat. This is all Jay wants and you don’t need to ask twice.

His pace shifts into something desperate and hungry. You're out of your mind, you're completely at his mercy, and there’s nothing else to be done. You're powerless.

You haven't passed out yet, but there’s darkness on the edge of your vision making you more slick for him. He catches your shaking leg, and puts it up over his shoulder, hitting you deeper than before.

You're gone. You're a feral, sobbing mess, and Jay’s only regret is that he has two hands.

He adds his thumb to your clit, and begins to play you in harmony with his cock.

And then you know. You're supposed to be with Jay. Whatever weird circumstances put you into each other’s orbit, it was meant to happen. If he breaks your heart, he’s going to be worth it.

Your whole life you’d either been seen as a weak, helpless pet, or someone who had it handled, only visible when you break. You're supposed to be something great, a big deal, never satisfied.

And now there’s Jay. He can throw you around and use you whenever he likes. You hope he does. You’re more satisfied in this “relationship” or “friendship” or whatever, than you had ever been before.

You want to be a toy, his toy.

With Jay inside of you, it’s like you have a sense of every organ of your body. You feel the head of his cock grind inside of you, and your vision goes blurry.

You bear down around him, and you're beautiful. Jay’s gone. You’re beautiful and Jay’s gone.

All he knows now is how to thrust as deep and as hard as possible. He’s trying and it’s enough.

You squeak against him as he grinds painfully slow against your cervix, releasing himself with tense muscles and a soft rumble in his chest. His groans vibrate through the air as you follow him all the way down.

Jay does his best to fuck you through, face in your neck, thumb massaging your exposed clit. Your breath is soft, high pitched in his ear. He moves to take some weight off you, but you catch him again, digging our nails into his back, and his neck.

You feel overheated, but if he moves away from you, you’re going to die.

His breathing’s getting ragged, and yours has almost stopped completely. You don’t do things like this. You don’t let people make you feel like this.

Whatever poise you had tried to maintain had shattered in his hands, you’re terrified. He’s terrifying. Your neck had given up, head lolling to the side, limp and fucked out, eyes unfocused. Jay reaches down slowly, pulling your face to his.

You just want to be good to him, and for him. He’s trying to be good back.

“Jannu I-I . . .” He trails, takes your hand in his and presses a kiss into the palm. He can’t get the words out.

He thrusts into you a few more times, and you faintly squeak underneath. His hand is resting on your throat, carefully keeping track of your pulse. Jay’s relishing how warm and pliable you are underneath him. Only him.

He can do whatever he wants to you and all he wants to do is take you apart with his teeth.

Again and again and again and again.

And again.

And he does. He’s playing with you and teasing you, memorizing the little whimpers and sobs you give him, even if you're not quite coherent. You feel so full, and you can’t do a thing about it. It’s perfect. You wouldn’t change a thing.

Jay considers being responsible, but you smile at him, catching a lazy hand in his hair. He can’t. He’s never been logical, or sensible, and he needs to accept that about himself.

He says something in a language you don’t understand, pressing a kiss in between your breasts.

With a low groan, Jay pulls out of you. You let out a little gasp as you feel his eyes between your legs, likely watching himself spill out of you. The thought of what he must be looking at sent a chill up your spine. Jesus, when did you get to be such a slut?

You take a large hand in yours, separating two long fingers. Jay inhales sharply, as if you’re going to attack him. You don’t, obviously, instead you work the digits into your mouth slowly, letting yourself suck freely. He takes his hand back.

Jay pulls your legs further apart, making you squeak, but he collects himself on his fingers and pumps them back up into you. He’s quick with his pace, and he doesn’t let any of himself spill out of you. It’s brutal and it’s perfect.

You twist away from him, overstimulated, but he doesn’t let you go. He’s too strong, he’s bigger and stronger and faster and . . .

There’s something so scary about being exhausted, beyond words, and fucked out in every sense of the word, but still ready for someone who just destroyed you.

Your arching your back as you cum around his fingers, you shiver in the cold air of your room.

God, he’s been holding back

You fall apart into his hands and Jay decides right there that this was it. That you were it.

It’s a lot to think about.

Jay gets off the bed, head spinning, trying to figure out where your comforter had gotten to, but you don’t know. You’ve twisted your way into the pillows and you can’t seem to move out of them.

You can’t feel Jay and your heart skips.

Everything is cold and terrible and you're going to die if he doesn’t come back to you immediately.

“Jay,” you gasp,” please.”

You shove your wine into your hand, which he turns into a hum when he gets back into the bed, pressing a kiss into your spine, and pulling you to him.

You feel a low rumble from his chest. Your words make him feel like he’d been shot again. Well, not exactly that feeling, but the haze that came after.

“You’ve been p-patient with me,” He leans back, pressing a kiss into your forehead, “thank y-you.”

Your heart’s pounding in your ears. You can’t respond, there aren’t any words in your head. You're asleep in less than a moment, unceremoniously spread over the pillows.

Jay wraps you tightly in the yellow blanket and two strong arms. Jay mumbles into your neck, soothing the bites he leaves with his tongue and gasping lightly to himself, because every few seconds he’d remember where the hell he was and what he was doing.

The most Jay had ever felt of you was the occasional hand on your lower back, but the dull realization came walking into his head that there was so much of you he’d never felt. If he could speak, he’d ask for more. He’d ask for everything.

And one day, he’s going to tell you.

#mine mine mine #jay menha #this is messy no one LOOK #i live in colorado don't judge me #REQUESTS I HOPE YOU LIKE IT #dev patel #my BELOVED

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