#jonathan snowflake starkgaryen

[ladystoneboobs]

catelyn

lysa

cersei

alannys

dany

gilly

i call this collection 5 highborn westerosi mothers worrying about and missing their sons + 1 wildling mother losing her son to a guy who never knew his own mother, a motherless son continuing the line of motherless boys and boyless mothers

[ladystoneboobs]

hey, he's not entirely wrong. the mutineers stabbed him in the back but left his face alone, as far as we know. the raven cannot be trusted to do that.

new theory alert: that bird is gonna peck out jon's eye while his corpse is still chilling just to make him look more like cousin bloodraven.

jon snow aka the fraudulent president of an arctic penal colony where everyone hates him also will 100% be assassinated tomorrow: my worst enemy is this fucking bird

[ladystoneboobs]

Toad stepped close. "The little lordling has a mouth on him," he said. He had pig eyes, small and shiny. "Is that your mommy's mouth, bastard? What was she, some whore? Tell us her name. Maybe I had her a time or two." He laughed. Jon twisted like an eel and slammed a heel down across the instep of the boy holding him. There was a sudden cry of pain, and he was free. He flew at Toad, knocked him backward over a bench, and landed on his chest with both hands on his throat, slamming his head against the packed earth. -Jon III, aGoT "The Bastard speaks and the peasants tremble," the master-at-arms said in that sharp, cold voice of his. "I remind you that I am the master-at-arms here, Lord Snow." [...] Ser Alliser's onyx eyes were fixed on Jon Snow. "It would seem our Bastard is in love," he said as Jon helped the fat boy to his feet. "Show me your steel, Lord Snow." [...] Thorne smiled. "The Bastard wishes to defend his lady love, so we shall make an exercise of it. Rat, Pimple, help our Stone Head here." Rast and Albett moved to join Halder. "Three of you ought to be sufficient to make Lady Piggy squeal. All you need do is get past the Bastard." -Jon IV, aGoT [Alliser Thorne:] "[...] To make room for them, I have decided to pass eight of you on to the Lord Commander to do with as he will." He called out the names one by one. "Toad. Stone Head. Aurochs. Lover. Pimple. Monkey. Ser Loon." Last, he looked at Jon. "And the Bastard." [...] He wondered who she[his mother] had been, what she had looked like, why his father had left her. Because she was a whore or an adulteress, fool. Something dark and dishonorable, or else why was Lord Eddard too ashamed to speak of her? -Jon V, aGoT Styr had taken off his helm to survey the scene of his triumph, and the bald earless whoreson was smiling. -Jon VII, aSoS "Why do we need to freeze it?" Grenn had asked him. "Why don't we just roll the barrels off the way they are?" Jon answered, "If they crash against the Wall on the way down they'll burst, and loose gravel will spray everywhere. We don't want to rain pebbles on the whoresons." -Jon IX, aSoS [Jon, to Stannis:] "[...]The Umbers have no love for the Boltons. If Whoresbane has joined the Bastard, it can only be because the Lannisters hold the Greatjon captive." -Jon IV, aDwD He'd had Mikken make a sword for Arya once, a bravo's blade, made small to fit her hand. Needle. He wondered if she still had it. Stick them with the pointy end, he'd told her, but if she tried to stick the Bastard, it could mean her life. -Jon VI, aDwD [Cregan Karstark:]"I see what you are, Snow. Half a wolf and half a wildling, baseborn get of a traitor and a whore. [...]" -Jon X, aDwD Bastard, was the only word written outside the scroll. No Lord Snow or Jon Snow or Lord Commander. Simply Bastard. And the letter was sealed with a smear of hard pink wax. [...] I have my swords, thought Jon Snow, and we are coming for you, Bastard. -Jon XIII, aDwD

gotta love when jon uses insults he hates being applied to himself against his hated enemies. what better way to express your contempt than insulting the enemy's mother and show how rotten they are just for being born to such a woman? and while Bastard of Bolton (or of the Dreadfort) could be considered almost a title like the Bastard of Winterfell for jon (as applied to him by ygritte and melisandre), but Bastard capitalized on its own when not even at the start of a sentence? only two characters are ever quoted that way about jon: ramsay the bastardliest Bastard himself and ser alliser, jon's very first nemesis.

[ladystoneboobs]

theon's thoughts of his existing black wardrobe when considering the watch has been talked of plenty, but let's not ignore the rest of this fantasy which is imo even funnier. bc a) he remembers jon snow joining the nw as a selling point but fails to consider what it would mean to meet jon again after taking wf and supposedly killing bran and rickon and b) he describes it as a life of honor but assumes he can bed wildling women, which watchmen usually see as the most dishonorable kind of sex, not just patronizing the whores south of the wall but sleeping with the enemy. his newly-turned and fleeting ambitions of captaining a ship at eastwatch, rising to first ranger and even lord commander look downright logical and realistic compared with forgetting the celibacy vows and the motive he's just given jon snow--who never really liked him to begin with--to oathbreak by murdering him on sight. (tho, funnily enough he is kinda foreshadowing jon's soon approaching experience of sex with a wildling woman and facing accusations that his black cloak was indeed turned, even after rising to the position of lord commander. biggest difference is jon did not plan and go looking for a wildling lover, was unaware of his own possible princehood, and ygritte likely would not care about jon's royalty except to joke about it if they did know.)

[ladystoneboobs]

were sansa and catelyn given the only warm bedchambers in wf while all the boys were made to huddle together for warmth or was sansa lying to lf just bc she was embarassed by his insulting vision of her home?

[ladystoneboobs]

i mean, one of those stepmothers was already forcibly resurrected before him. like i understand where you're coming from but they did very much forcibly resurrect catelyn stark. an undead corpse hanging people all over the riverlands is a bit more active in horror movie-style haunting than whatever rhaegar and lyanna have going on.

unfortunately for jon snow, the role of "dead girl haunting the narrative" is already occupied by his mother, father, brother, sister, uncle, grandmother and step mother x2 so he's going to have to be forcibly resurrected :/

[ladystoneboobs]

[Jaime, to Brynden Tully:]"I will permit you to take the black. Ned Stark's bastard is the Lord Commander on the Wall." The Blackfish narrowed his eyes. "Did your father arrange for that as well? Catelyn never trusted the boy, as I recall, no more than she ever trusted Theon Greyjoy. It would seem she was right about them both. No, ser, I think not. I'll die warm, if you please, with a sword in hand running red with lion blood." -Jaime VI, aFfC

there's always been some debate about how seriously to take the blackfish's words about jon here, and whether he's actually trying to keep the lannisters in the dark about jon being a possible new kitn according to robb's will. for me, after due consideration, what seals it (but seems to be overlooked whenever this subject comes up) is the reference to theon as equally mistrusted by catelyn. except she never did distrust theon in that way! cat may have found his constant smiling suspicious, but if anything, she trusted theon too much and took the loyalty and obedience of ned's hostage completely for granted.

[Catelyn, to Brienne:]"Bran and Rickon tried to escape, but were taken at a mill on the Acorn Water. Theon Greyjoy has mounted their heads on the walls of Winterfell. Theon Greyjoy, who ate at my table since he was a boy of ten." -Catelyn VII, aCoK

there's no sense of being proved right when she learned all that theon supposedly did at wf, only that he was a member of their household for 10 years, without any mention of his being a hostage from an enemy family as the only reason he lived with them.

and if that's not conclusive enough, let's look back to when cat reunited with robb after ned's arrest while theon was still a member of robb's entourage.

[Catelyn, to Robb, about his leading the northern army:]"No one?" she said. "Pray, who were those men I saw here a moment ago? Roose Bolton, Rickard Karstark, Galbart and Robett Glover, the Greatjon, Helman Tallhart … you might have given the command to any of them. Gods be good, you might even have sent Theon, though he would not be my choice." -Catelyn VIII, aGoT

yeah, she said he wouldn't be her first choice, but still the fact that she presented theon as a viable option at all, not her best suggestion as an advisor imo. can you even imagine foreign hostage theon leading an army of veteran northmen--a number of whom must have fought against balon's first rebellion alongside ned--to save ned? (not to mention that theon was 5yrs older than robb but in no way more experienced as a commander or warrior in any sense, and not any better trained as a leader in his perpetually subordinate captive squire position.) before that, she accepted theon's bs embellishments about ned being a second father to him and knowing his family owed hers a great debt without even a thought of doubt. and when she did argue with robb about sending theon back to the islands it was framed as distrust about balon only, not disputing robb's assertion that theon proved his loyalty by fighting in battle for them and saving bran's life in the wolfswood before that.

in conclusion, any idea that catelyn distrusted theon all along and was only proven right about him without any shock would have to a rewriting of history on her part, of which there's no evidence in her own pov in asos. it's possible she could have presented this false narrative to the blackfish sometime offpage in asos, just like it's possible she wrote letters to him in the vale airing her family's dirty laundry and complaining endlessly about jon's existence without ever mentioning that communication in her own pov, but the simpler and more likely explanation imo is that this discrepancy is bc the blackfish was lying to jaime. esp considering the blackfish was also in robb's inner circle and as both were non-povs all of their convos without catelyn would have to take place offpage moreso than brynden's with catelyn, and that edmure, another tully and the one in riverrun least close to robb, witnessed robb's will, and that sers desmond grell and robin ryger, two long-serving, high-ranking, and trusted riverrun retainers, did take up jaime's offer to go to the wall, which seems an odd choice if the blackfish was indeed wholly against that institution under jon snow's command and presumably would have tried to dissaude his men from joining. and i'd say there's no evidence catelyn ever suspected jon of willingness to work with ned's killers and robb's enemies or even hated him as much as the people who killed ned and twice tried to kill bran. which makes brynden's absolutely wild accusation of jon owing his rise to tywin lannister well beyond anything cat said or thought about jon in her own pov, which only further makes me thinks his words were insincere. (she may, at times, have wanted to believe jon untrustworthy to justify her own feelings about him, but such suspicion was not the source of those feelings. idt she actually needed to see him as a true enemy to dislike him when being ned's (alleged) bastard was enough without any sins of jon's own.)

[ladystoneboobs]

when it comes to the theon/starks pov trap, so many fans just assume jon's and bran's dislike of theon must be only bc they're just smarter, better judges of character than dumbly friendly robb, even somewhow foretelling theon's later actions at wf in clash. all of them missing that the explanation for why theon was closest to robb is clearly stated in his own first pov, after we've gotten to know jon and bran.

As for their[Ned/Catelyn's] children, the younger ones had been mewling babes for most of his years at Winterfell. Only Robb and his baseborn half brother Jon Snow had been old enough to be worth his notice. -Theon I, aCoK

when you've been sent to live with an unknown family in a strange land and the only boys in that family are ~5 years younger than you, it's natural you're going to learn to ignore that age difference to socialize with the only peers available. but that doesn't mean doing the same with little babies born after your arrival with 10+yr age gaps, that's an age difference too far. jon and robb have to care for all the starklings younger than them, that's their family, but theon was never a member of that family. it's only natural to only want to hang out with your friend and not adopt their hangers-on younger siblings as yours too. idt bran or rickon can be blamed for only robb ever being brotherly toward theon (as he once retorted to maester luwin while hunting for them in the wolfswood), they're little kids, but the point is everyone was reacting in regular kid patterns. bran had no reason to warm up much to an older boy who stole robb's attention from him while having no time for bran in return. (or at least that's how he'd see it.) the notion that bran was rejecting theon from a place of moral superiority implies there was something more there to be rejected. but i think it's more likely that, had it not been for the natural results of a ~12yr age gap, if bran had been a little older or theon had been a little more willing to befriend little kids, then imo bran would have been eager to join the club with all the older boys and truly feel like "a man grown". imho, a closer reading of agot would show that this explanation was also right there in starkling pov all along.

He[Jon Snow] missed his true brothers: little Rickon, bright eyes shining as he begged for a sweet; Robb, his rival and best friend and constant companion; Bran, stubborn and curious, always wanting to follow and join in whatever Jon and Robb were doing. -Jon III, aGoT Even when he was home at Winterfell, Robb the Lord seemed to have more time for Hallis Mollen and Theon Greyjoy than he ever did for his brothers. -Bran IV, aGoT

as for theon/jon ...

The bastard was a sullen boy, quick to sense a slight, jealous of Theon's high birth and Robb's regard for him. -Theon I, aCoK

i think that jealousy for robb's regard must have been mutual, and yet we know who'd win that contest as idt robb would ever yell at jon for saving bran's life. jon had reason to envy theon's station when he was sidelined on special occassions, the same as theon envied jon's relationships with non-catelyn winterfellians. (ie, "Even the bastard Jon Snow had been accorded more honor than he had." theon had a father who was likely a miser with affection even before his wars and here's ned stark and a good part of his household treating even a bastard better than balon greyjoy treated his youngest child, almost as good as the stark heir and more welcome than the ironborn heir who should be robb's equal.) wf castle may have been huge but still not big enough for two liminal quasi-outsiders/not-quite-starks in the same official household with only so much respect, regard, and honor to go around.

there's also just a bit of a personality clash from jon's side of things. idt theon ever really knowingly or intentionally hurt jon, much less bullied him. but look at the rest of his behavior in that first theon pov chapter, casually seducing the captain's daughter and quipping about getting her pregnant, with no thought of ever seeing her again, making it unlikely he'd acknowledge, much less care for, this hypothetical greyjoy bastard. imagine how this attitude comes off to a proudly voluntary celibate teen who at least once declared he would never father a bastard. theon doesn't understand jon's baggage anymore than jon understands why theon, living under an implied threat of possible execution, might make light of beheadings. (some of their reasons for sullenness were similar but others were different enough to ensure that the wf household wasn't big enough for the both of them rather than them finding common ground.) to jon, it's all one and the same, part of theon being a selfish ass. but jon is also the same guy who later kept loving ygritte after she murdered an old man right in front of him, so it's not impossible that he could have befriended theon if they'd met later under different circumstances.

the real difference wrt the wf boys and theon is that robb was just the right mix of naturally friendly extrovert, close enough in age, and without too much baggage of his own to be theon's closest friend.

but we can also see that dislike of theon =/= distrust of theon. bran, as a little kid, is bewildered by theon's invasion of wf, not really getting what it meant that he was always ned's hostage as well as ward. jon may understand more of the background there and reiterated to himself that he never liked theon when hearing of the sack of wf, but he was still confused by the details of what he learned, thinking theon would never do that. and he was right about theon then! the boys theon killed were not bran and rickon, and it's true he would never burn and sack wf, that part was entirely ramsay. theon would emphatically never sack and burn his great war prize, which meant so much more bc he grew up there. that's so true, jon! so, far from sensing a deeper depravity in theon or always seeing him as an enemy, (which rather goes againt the false impression that theon was practically an adopted stark with reason to be equally brotherly to all ned's kids) when jon is objectively right about theon, it's actually in a positive sense, just that he was a skilled archer who wouldn't murder bran and rickon and would never sack wf. that's the jon who sees more and understands when his understanding applies to theon.

[ladystoneboobs]

y’know, whatever the true parentage of aegon vi aka young griff, in a way he is more like rhaegar than jon snow is. by which i mean their attempts to force themselves into archetypal roles, rhaegar as the prophesied hero against supernatural dark forces and yg as the hidden-prince-in-exile come to save the country and restore peace and harmony by taking the throne.

rhaegar’s very existence is owed to a prophecy, when the ghost of high heart said the ptwp would come of aerys/rhaella’s line they were forced to get married by their father. his destiny was decided and agreed before he was born, as just a hypothetical male prince. bc ofc this promised prince must be a son born with a cock, right? no one ever looked for or expected a princess for this. and when he was born during the mysterious tragedy at summerhall, what could be more of a sign that the prophecy was fulfilled? no need to keep waiting for any more kids, anyone further down the line, this baby had such a dramatic entrance he has got to be the specialest boy of all. rhaegar likely knew all of this from a very young age. grandpa jaehaerys ii believed enough to force his kids to marry, so he wouldn’t want this important planning to go to waste by taking it to his grave, now, would he? was rhaegar reading all the time bc his favorite genre was old prophecy scrolls or was he always doing homework to become the hero he knew he already was? does it really matter when either way he never really had much choice in his role in life? one day he finally goes to train with the master-at-arms only bc he realized from his reading that he “must” be a warrior. he became as great at that as he was at anything else, according to ser barry, but he never enjoyed knighthood. 

to me that’s all a far cry from jon, who grew up idolizing daeron the young dragon and dreaming of glory and conquest. jon, who spent most of his waking hours training in the yard even when injured at the end of asos, just bc he didn’t know what else to do and it helped him blow off steam. jon, who had a nostalgic “hunger” in him when hearing the sound of swords in the yard as lc. the same guy who as of acok still couldn’t get why sam would consider old books and crumbling scolls to be treasure. jon, who has nothing but doubts once he does rise to power and herodom as lord commander and can’t conquer them. and most importantly, jon, the hero who chanced into his role as shield guarding the realms of men only bc ned won the fight at the toj after rhaegar died and took him to be raised in the north. if/when jon does return to life and take his place as a heroic head of the dragon, that role can only be his own choice, not one he was raised for his entire life, just as his membership in the night’s watch was ultimately his own choice based on his northern childhood. (jon’s conception may have also been prophecy-related, but beyond that, his path and rhaegar’s sharply diverged.)

know who was shaped for a royal destiny “since before he could walk”, though? that’s right, aegon in essos aka young griff. his destiny was already chosen for him by the schemes of illyrio/varys just as rhaegar’s was by grampy jae ii and other dragon prophecy nerds before him. he studied his scrolls and trained with the royal master-at-arms just as aegon studied in the routines of his entourages and was trained by knights of the golden company.

and, at some point, we know rhaegar realized he wasn’t the ptwp and decided it was his first son, aegon, instead. mostly bc a comet was seen the night of aegon’s conception. i remember seeing a post years ago saying rhaegar must have spotted the comet that night, run naked straight to elia, and declared they had to get babymaking asap bc the comet was a sign too significant to be ignored. a joke post, prob, but i feel like there’s prob a lot of truth to the idea of rhaegar desparetely forcing the signs to add up, concieving a child on that night after he’d already seen the comet rather than just happening to have sex with elia on the same night there just happened to be a comet sighting. i believe this bc why would it all just be lucky coincidence if aegon vi was not the ptwp? lbr now, whether he indeed got his head smashed in by the mountain or was switched out and sent to essos, rhaegar’s elder son was/is not the promised hero. (just like rhaegar himself could not be the pwtp, after all.) a previously-thought-dead-for-16-years newbie with shaky parentage credentials introduced this late in the game is not going to steal both jon’s and dany’s thunder like that, c’mon. so a comet appearing just for his conception feels about as likely as red rahloo actually killing 3 kings just for the sake of frickin’ stannis. it’s even possible that rhaegar later decided aegon might not be the ptwp either and put more stock in dragon head #3 bc of the whole ice and fire union aspect with lyanna. we just don’t have enough info about that part of the story to know for sure. but there’s no suggestion he was unhappy with elia beforehand or that either of them thought she could not bear more children until the maesters actually said so after aegon’s birth. and even if he was “right” about lyanna’s child being the most important one (ew), he was still counting on both aegon and rhaenys to be the other two heads of the dragon, and presumably planned to raise all 3 of them for their destiny together in kl as he had been. in which case his plans utterly failed, because that is just not at all what happened with any of those kids.

in that sense, death is what jon and his bio dad most have in common as they both walked fairly boldly and blindly into their doom. but the circumstances are still a bit different as jon was murdered in a mutiny rather than killed in battle, not to mention his likely resurrection as an actual hero of prophecy. despite being around 10 years older than either jon or aegon is presently, i’d say rhaegar was even more naively overconfident in his plans than jon was in his final moments. to go that quickly and without any known hesitation through each change of plans from simply being ptwp himself to becoming a warrior as well as a weirdo nerd to fathering 3 heads of the dragon to truly fulfill prophecy to organizing a political coup at harrenhal to honoring lyanna instead to eloping with her after aegon’s birth to make her wife #2 and mother of dragon head #3 to riding off to one definitve battle against cousin robert after hiding in his lovenest with lyanna for months, idk, that does not read to me as someone suffering the same questions and doubts jon did in the nw. rhaegar told jaime “when this battle’s done” not “if i return in victory” in their farewell. he had no back-up plans in case of his defeat, leaving elia with aerys and lyanna in the toj, no plans for how to protect either wife or any of his all-important prophesied progeny in the event of his loss, just as he had no immediate plans to deal with aerys yet. (compare that to idealistic young king robb stark, thought to be recklessly honorable and accused of thinking himself invincible in his youth, yet he still managed to make plans for his succession should he die childless in battle, and planned to put his wife and mother in strongholds held by trustworthy (sane) allies who could defend their positions for some time in his absence.) all that only makes sense to me if he always thought he’d still have time for all that later, never truly envisioning the possibility of house targ being overthrown so soon when all his hero kids were still babies. 

after all, whether he was the ptwp himself or only meant to raise the 3 promised dragon heads as heroes, surely their destiny was already written years before and he couldn’t go out in such a mundane way, right? i’d say aegon/yg shows the same kind of overconfidence in going along with all the gc’s changes in planning, from whatever varys/illyrio originally wanted with viserys iii alive to finding dany and marrying her after the birth of her dragons to leaving for an invasion of westeros first to conquer the stormlands himself before wedding dany as equals. he never imagined she could refuse him until tyrion told him so, and imo is still not grasping that his female relation could prove more important than him in westeros with her 3 dragons. rhaegar may have known he was doomed since his tragic birth among so much death and later knew he wasn’t the pwtp, but he likely still expected a higher doom, one as dramatic and magical as his birth at summerhall. he couldn’t imagine his chest being caved in by lyanna’s dumbass ex, his boorish cousin robert, just as aegon/yg can’t know what doom could be in store for him in westeros either. 

[ladystoneboobs]

i call this collection, contradictory quotes from two boys very, very confused about their families, homes, and loyalties.

[ladystoneboobs]

it’s def both. asos!jon could lift a grown-ass man off the ground one-handed, after all, despite being a lean teen too small to wear longclaw on his hip yet.

A visualization:

I think GRRM forgot how huge direwolves are. Or mister Jonathan Snow is fucking stronk.

[ladystoneboobs]

Just discovered your blog and your tag for jon snow makes my day! Jonathan snowflake starkgaryen you are loved by many

tyvm, i had considered just doing away with the joke tag since it's long and not one tumblr remembers for me, but that settles it. glad to know the tag is appreciated!

[ladystoneboobs]

we in fandom like to make jokes about jon snow needing to smile, being an emo boy, serious like stannis or melancholy like rhaegar. i know i've been guilty of that myself, at times. but on re-read these unsmiling accusations just don't hold up.

"There," Jon said. He swung his horse around and galloped back across the bridge. They watched him dismount where the direwolf lay dead in the snow, watched him kneel. A moment later he was riding back to them, smiling. [jon finding puppy ghost] -Bran I, aGoT

Jon grinned and reached under the table to ruffle the shaggy white fur. [petting ghost under the table] -Jon I, aGoT

Jon smiled. [after benjen asked how much wine he'd drunk at the feast] -Jon I, aGoT

He smiled. "Come here, then." [when arya comes to see the boys fight] -Arya I, aGoT

Jon grinned, reached over, and messed up her hair. Arya flushed. [watching bran and tommen sparring] -Arya I, aGoT

He gave her a half smile. [after arya asked why he wasn't down with the other guys] -Arya I, aGoT

Jon chuckled. "Perhaps you should do the same thing, little sister. Wed Tully to Stark in your arms." [after pointing out joffrey's lion-stag coat of arms] -Arya I, aGoT

Jon forced himself to smile back. [saying goodbye to robb] -Jon II, aGoT

Arya gave him a whap on the arm with the flat of her blade. The blow stung, but Jon found himself grinning like an idiot. "I know which end to use," Arya said. [after telling her "stick them with the pointy end"] -Jon II, aGoT

Arya ran to him for a last hug. "Put down the sword first," Jon warned her, laughing. -Jon II, aGoT

Jon Snow stroked Ghost's thick white fur, smiling now. [after ghost knocked tyrion to the ground] -Tyrion II, aGoT

"It was the grumkins," Tyrion told him, laughing. Jon Snow smiled. [after benjen said he was worried the others got jon when he wandered off] -Tyrion II, aGoT

[....]yet she could always make Jon smile. [jon remembering his bond with arya, and the many smiles she got from him] -Jon III, aGoT

Jon ran down the stairs, a smile on his face and Robb's letter in his hand. [after learning bran woke up from his coma] -Jon III, aGoT

Jon smiled at him. "I'm sorry about your wrist. Robb used the same move on me once, only with a wooden blade. It hurt like seven hells, but yours must be worse. Look, if you want, I can show you how to defend that." [making friends with grenn] -Jon III, aGoT

"No," said Jon, smiling, "but Grenn held his own against Halder this morning, and Pyp is no longer dropping his sword quite so often as he did." [after tyrion asked if ghost had learned to juggle yet] -Tyrion III, aGoT

Jon smiled. [making friends with sam] -Jon IV, aGoT

Jon Snow laughed with him. [laughing with sam as ghost licked his face] -Jon IV, aGoT

Jon smiled. [still with sam, telling him about dareon's singing] [....] They laughed at that together. [laughing with sam some more after telling him about toad's bad singing] -Jon IV, aGoT

"You'll do well at that," Jon said, smiling. [after sam tells him he'll be maester aemon's steward] -Jon VI, aGoT

It was only Jon, covered with flour. "You stupid," she told him, "you scared the baby," but Jon and Robb just laughed and laughed, and pretty soon Bran and Arya were laughing too. [arya recalling jon and robb's crypt ghost prank] -Arya IV, aGoT

Sam blushed a vivid crimson and tripped over his own tongue as he tried to stammer out a courtesy. Jon had to smile. [after the old bear compliments jon and sam for their insight about the corpses] -Jon VII, aGoT

The guards smiled at him from their niches as he wound his way down the turret stair, carrying the sword in his good hand. "Sweet steel," one man said. "You earned that, Snow," another told him. Jon made himself smile back at them, but his heart was not in it. [after being given longclaw] -Jon VIII, aGoT

The others laughed, and even Jon had to smile. [the boys teasing jon about being rewarded for burning the lc's chambers] -Jon VIII, aGoT

Ghost sniffed at his carved stone likeness and tried a lick. Jon smiled. [introducing longclaw to ghost] -Jon VIII, aGoT

"They'll do." Jon gave Sam a private smile. "We did." [watching satin and the other new recruits] -Jon I, aCoK

"He likes that word," Jon said, smiling. [hearing the old bear's raven call out "king"] -Jon I, aCoK

"Too few roofs for all of us." Jon mounted again, gave Sam a parting smile, and rode off. [meeting with sam outside whitetree village] -Jon II, aCoK

"A bastard," Jon said with a laugh. [as sam gets hung up speaking of craster's birth] -Jon III, aCoK

Jon smiled. "Want them all for yourself, Dywen?" [joking with dywen about craster's wives] -Jon III, aCoK

Jon smiled. "Well, I hear he's been here a long time." [after dolorous edd wonders if the hill is made of craster's shit] -Jon III, aCoK

Jon smiled. "He wants an axe. And wine as well." [after edd complained more about craster] -Jon III, aCoK

[as edd wonders about craster using the axe to murder them] Jon had to laugh. "Craster's one man. We're two hundred. I doubt he'll murder anyone." -Jon III, aCoK

"I remember," said Jon with a startled laugh. A young black brother on the wallwalk, yes . . . [as mance recalls the first time they met at winterfell] -Jon I, aSoS

"What could you do if you did find her?" Jon asked, smiling. "You said she bit your member off." [joking with tormund about his she-bear lover] -Jon II, aSoS

Jon laughed. "You'd freeze me to death." [when ygritte suggested bathing in a frozen river] -Jon II, aSoS

When Jon laughed, she pulled him in too. [when ygritte stumbled into the pool in the cave] -Jon III, aSoS

[thinking about ygritte] I know one thing. I know that you are wildling to the bone. It was easy to forget that sometimes, when they[jon and ygritte] were laughing together, or kissing. -Jon V, aSoS

Despite fever, exhaustion, his leg, the Magnar, the old man, Ygritte, Mance, despite it all, Jon smiled. It was good to be back, good to see Noye with his big belly and pinned-up sleeve, his jaw bristling with black stubble. [returning home to castle black] -Jon VI, aSoS

Jon made himself smile. "The Frostfangs are cold. This is a brisk autumn day." [when satin complained of the cold before battle] -Jon VII, aSoS

"The chariots, the horsemen, all those fools on foot . . . what are they going to do to us up here? Any of you ever see a mammoth climb a wall?" He laughed, and Pyp and Owen and half a dozen more laughed with him. "They're nothing, they're less use than our straw brothers here, they can't reach us, they can't hurt us, and they don't frighten us, do they?" [watching the wildlings from atop the wall] -Jon VIII, aSoS

[.....]Jon laughed, laughed like a drunk or a madman, and his men laughed with him. -Jon VIII, aSoS

Jon made himself smile. [after owen spoke of his dream of rescue by king robert] -Jon IX, aSoS

Smiling, he left them to it and rode down in the cage. [after giving command of the wall to pyp, shocking pyp and grenn] -Jon IX, aSoS

Jon had to laugh. Even now, even here. [as tormund explained that longspear ryk's name was a dick joke] -Jon X, aSoS

He watched the child nurse at Gilly's breast, and then he watched Jon watch. Jon is smiling. A sad smile, still, but definitely a smile of sorts. Sam was glad to see it. It is the first time I've seen him smile since I got back. -Samwell IV, aSoS

Jon Snow had smiled to see him too, but it was a tired smile, like the one he wore now. "You made it back after all," he said. "And brought Gilly out as well. You've done well, Sam." -Samwell IV, aSoS

Perhaps Jon had ridden with the free folk too long; he could not help but laugh. [after stannis offered to give him the "wildling princess" along with winterfell] -Jon XI, aSoS

[remembering his childhood time with robb] Every morning they had trained together, since they were big enough to walk; Snow and Stark, spinning and slashing about the wards of Winterfell, shouting and laughing, sometimes crying when there was no one else to see. -Jon XII, aSoS

That was so absurd Jon had to smile. "By who?" he said, looking for his friends. [learning he's been nominated as lc] -Jon XII, aSoS

Jon laughed, half amazed that he still remembered how. [at sam saying the raven almost made him wet himself] -Jon XII, aSoS

That made Jon laugh. [at sam describing his inability to swat a bug] -Samwell I, aFfC

“So if I can just convince the lords of the Seven Kingdoms to give us their Valyrian blades, all is saved? That won’t be hard.” No harder than asking them to give up their coin and castles. He[Jon] gave a bitter laugh. [after sam told him about the last hero using "dragonsteel"] -Jon II, aDwD

Jon smiled a strange, sad smile. "And pull your hood up. The snowflakes are melting in your hair." [bidding farewell to sam] -Samwell I, aFfC

Needle was Jon Snow's smile. [arya recalling all of jon's smiles] -Arya II, aFfC

Jon had to smile. "It will not come to that." [after edd joked about having to eat the wildlings in winter] -Jon IV, aDwD

Jon smiled. "Some had best not say so in my presence." [preparing to lead their new brothers to swear vows to the old gods beyond the wall, after edd warned him some men would disapprove] -Jon VII, aDwD

[telling emmett of his new command over a garrison of spearwives] The look of mingled horror and delight that passed across Iron Emmett's face was worth more than a sack of gold. "What have I done to make you hate me so, my lord?" Jon laughed. -Jon VII, aDwD

Jon knew he should not smile, but he did. "Only a mustache. Very wispy. You can count the hairs." [talking to val about selyse's facial hair] -Jon XI, aDwD

[dolorous edd complaining again] [...] Jon smiled. -Jon XII, aDwD

Jon had to laugh. "You never change." [after tormund joked about his dick ring] -Jon XII, aDwD

[tormund, as his people crossed through the gate]"You wanted warriors, didn't you? Well, there they are. Every one worth six o' your black crows." Jon had to smile. -Jon XII, aDwD

so that feels like a fair amount of smiles and outright laughter. only a few of them forced smiles, which is still different from a refusal to ever smile. more of them are "he had to smile" as in a smile he could not help, despite the circumstances, a natural instinct to smile, however sad and/or tired. that's not counting any unnoted by his inner monologue, or those pre-agot smiles or laughs not specifically recalled by arya or another starkling, or any asearchoficeandfire may have missed. not to mention all his jokes made without tormund-like grins or laughs but still with more intentional humor than stannis ever had. sure, he was never as smiley as renly or pre-reek theon, and the frequency of his smiles decreases as shit gets worse and worse, but the point is that his seriousness was never that abnormal. just teenage moodiness from someone whose life really was more unfair than his half-brothers, plus natural northern brooding noted in ned and even robb (who was said to only smile with jeyne and her brothers by asos), moreso than him just being a tragic dark-haired version of rhaegar, prince of sadsacks.

[ladystoneboobs]

This is no toy for children, least of all for a girl.

[Cat, to Robb:]”You were fighting with wooden swords less than a year past.” -Catelyn VIII, aGoT

y’know, it’s only in the context of lines like this i just recently realized the full significance of arya getting needle from jon. presumably jon didn’t have a real sword himself before leaving for castle black, as robb only started carrying one when he became acting lord of winterfell at the ripe age of 14 going on 15. jon tells her it’s not a toy, yes, but what does that make the swords he and robb used only just recently? it was while watching bran spar at tommen with wooden swords that arya expressed her wish to do the same, but jon gave her way better than that with needle. not knowing when he’d get a chance to see her again and knowing this would probably be his last chance to have a blacksmith do him such a favor, he has a steel sword with a true point made for her. it’s a real lethal weapon different from the usual westerosi swords in that it’s been custom made for her small size, but that just makes it a shorter version of the usual swords in braavos. jon knows arya wants a chance for swordplay like her brothers so he gives an actual lethal sword, even though she’s years younger than the age her brothers would need to reach to carry one and even though jon already spent all those years stuck with a wooden sword until right when our story begins. if arya wants a sword and jon’s getting his own steel sword, he’ll give her one too. never mind that he’s five years older and has been trained to fight all his life. jon doesn’t know who she could practice with once away from her brothers, and he couldn’t possibly know she was going to get a real braavosi sword master to teach her, he just knew he wanted her to have this lethal weapon on hand. 

ned got her syrio, yes, but you know he still hoped it was just a phase because he still wanted her to become a proper lady dependent on husband and sons. jon recognized the unfairness she felt in rigid gender roles and tried to make up for it with a lethal weapon so she’d have the means to defend herself if the need arose. i just think that’s neat.

[ladystoneboobs]

and thing is, auburn hair is not "fair" in the same way as lannister gold or targ silver, it's closer to brown than blond. bran's description of robb in that passage is of "red-brown" hair and elsewhere auburn hair is defined as "browny red". (catelyn remembers her father's hair as just brown before he went grey and white. and much later when bran sees the weirwood flashback of lyanna and benjen he realizes the girl can't be arya because "If the girl was Arya, the boy was Bran himself, and he had never worn his hair so long." only that benjen's hair was too long, not entirely the wrong color, which might be a detail one would notice first if there was such a stark contrast.) one could still say that reddish-brown would look brighter in the right light and the line is about how much darker brown the stark brown hair is, but that's just not as definitive as the targ and baratheon example and it would be much clearer if the line specified only hair. as stated above, some white europeans can have darker skin even when they don't live in hot climates.

where this argument loses me though is the assumption that drawing jon, arya, and ned as anything less than pale white is racist bc those characters are all meant to be (or are perceived to be by other characters) less good-looking than all their tully-featured counterparts. a contrast which is really only played up with arya/sansa, and only really believed by the girls themselves, jeyne poole, and septa mordane. what we have from catelyn on the matter is that arya "could be pretty if she would just wash and brush her hair and take more care with her dress", a backhanded compliment that is understandably more hurtful than helpful to arya, but it is a far cry from the insinuation that catelyn thinks her younger daughter is ugly for having the stark coloring and that sansa is beautiful only because her looks favor the tully side.

as for robb and jon, there's just no indication that i can find that either is considered the better-looking one. nowhere does anybody really describe robb's handsomesness or lack thereof. given catelyn's resentment toward jon you'd think it might come up if her son was considered to have inherited all the beauty. but in all the comparisons to robb and a younger edmure, nothing about them both being so handsome, and nothing about all the tully beauty whenever thinking he favored her side more than ned's. in fact, she's disappointed that none of her sons resemble ned the way jon does, which rather goes against the idea that the stark look is always considered inferior to tully looks. jon resembles young ned, yes, who was no great hottie, but that doesn't mean he was butt-ugly homely either, just that he was Just Some Average Guy. robb's looks could well be on the same level as ned's even if they don't look so alike. the one indication we have of robb's appeal is catelyn recalling jeyne poole mooning over him which duh, he was the heir to the entire north even if his face was just average. quentyn martell had girls interested in him back home too. by 15, he was a king and would have had even more appeal to the ladies. that was one of the areas he was always going to have the advantage over jon based on name and titles alone. jon's inferiority complex is all about his bastardy, throwing in arya's ugly duckling stigma too is pure fanon.

and then there's ned, who was originally seen as a disappointment looks-wise to catelyn, IN COMPARISON TO HIS BROTHER BRANDON. brandon was a fellow stark with stark features, and A Certified Hottie. as was their sister lyanna. no one comments on benjen's beauty either, so for all we know he could have been A Certified Hottie too, making ned the odd man out in his generation with his average looks. or if benjen is more like ned that's still a 50/50 ratio with no proof that the numbers are any better than that regarding tullys and tully-featured starks.

The whole drawing Jon with darker skin because Bran's POV states, "Jon was Dark where Robb was fair" is stupid when you know that GRRM writes Aemon and Jocelyn as "The Pale Prince and his Dark Lady"...it is not referring to skin color at all, it refers to their hair.

[ladystoneboobs]

seen a post saying it’s good actually if the starklings’ reunion involves conflict and awkwardness rather than pure warm and fuzzy, but may i offer an even warmer take? that it’s great that the family was introduced with conflict in the first place instead of being like some fantasy brady bunch perfect blended family. not to be yay child abuse and painful sibling fights, but when it comes to fictional families dysfunction can make for better-written dynamics. i like siblings who always have each other’s back and close parent/child bonds too, but even though i don’t find my own family all that fucked-up, having relationships with problems too just feels so much more relatable to me, and just flat-out more interesting. i love the greek tragedy of the lannisters too but sometimes dysfunction without incest and kinslaying is just the right level of relatable.

and it’s not like stark dysfunction is a new thing in the present generation with ned/jon/cat (which radiates out to robb, sansa and arya too). or with the other winterfell outcast, fosterling/hostage theon, whose situation would have been fucked-up no matter who ned’s wife was. i’d say the previous generation was pretty gd dysfunctional too. lyanna having to run away from her own family to escape an unwanted betrothal is a pretty desperate move imo*. in fact, the jon snow issue is a result of what happened with his mother, a direct continuation of previous dysfunction in a way. ned chalks lyanna’s tragedy up to her “wolf blood” as if it were pure passion with little rhyme or reason behind it, and nothing anybody could do to prevent it, but seems to me there was one sure way. lyanna’s death wouldn’t be shrouded in secrecy and no child of hers would be raised as ned’s bastard if someone had just listened to her concerns about robert and cared what her true feelings on the match were. ned could’ve done better with that, and maybe he should’ve advocated on her behalf to their father, but at least he was only a teenager himself. rickard had all the power over his kids and it seems lyanna didn’t even feel comfortable enough to talk honestly with him the way she’d tried to with ned.

*a desperate move analogous to alys karstark running from her unwanted suitor. and it’s pretty bad when house stark can be compared to house karstark bullshit, as they’re a northern Designated Asshole House where almost every male member is varying degrees of despicable.