#just remembering 13 year old tim at the club getting hit on by a grown ass woman 🤢

[zuzuzuko]

the "he should have been at the club" meme except it's Tim Drake and NO he absolutely should NOT have been at the club. He was 13 someone get his ass out of the club 😭

[kindness-bliss]

New Beginnings Ch. 12

Timothy Thatcher x OC

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: none

One year later   Tim looked at apartments with his fiance as they walked around, Emily was everything he could dream of. She had a good heart, educated, loved her job, was actually his age and extremely kind. It had started just days after that night at the club where she approached him at a coffee shop over the book he was reading, he was impressed that someone else could enjoy a George Orwell novel like him. From that day on it was non stop texting and late night phone calls which eventually turned into dates and then sleeping over at each others places and one day he just said fuck it and got a ring at a shop and proposed. It was nothing special truly, he didn’t even get down on one knee which he kind of regretted but not really. He liked her, he liked her a lot but part of him knew he didn’t love her.    “Sweetheart, are you alright ?” Emily asked petting his cheek “you look out of it”   Tim shook his head “Oh I’m fine, just thinking about what would be best is all. We looked at all the ones on our list and you seem to be keen on this area, this the one then ?”

 Emily grinned and nodded “It’s perfect, it’s near both our jobs and it’s a 2 bedroom just in case after the wedding you know….”   He sighed as he stepped back “Em, we’ve talked about this dozens of times already. I said I don’t want kids, I’m past that stage. Us together is enough for me and you said it was enough for you as well, remember ?”  

 “I did” she nodded “It’s just a maybe, like a what if situation kind of thing is all. I know where you stand on children and I totally respect plus we’re both 38, that’s a long shot honey”

Tim chuckled lightly, giving a nod “very true, but just maybe let’s leave it at that ?”. Nothing about moving in with her felt natural, nothing. He liked her a lot but he knew he had rushed things. Everyone had told him it was too soon and that he was only doing it to get over Maya but even they couldn’t stop him from proposing. The second he put the ring on her finger he knew it was a mistake.   

“I just think it’s good to talk about it because though you know I wouldn’t ever create an oopsie situation, it can still be a what if” Emily explained “Plus you told me at the beginning of us that you wouldn’t mind one, just one”   

“I said that almost a year ago, things and people change. Right now what matters to me is my career and your career and doing our own thing” he explains

“Wrestling won’t last forever Tim” she says softly “I know you plan on doing it for as long as you can which is great but we both know realistically it’s a good 5 years left before you have to call it quits for good. You should think about life beyond the ring, when it’s all done for good and you don’t have to put your body at risk every single day taking all those hits. I mean, do you ever think about that ?” “Clearly I do if we’re moving in together Emily '' he let out a little more dry than he had intended. It was one thing get on him about stupid shit like him leaving a plate out on the counter or leaving a damp towel on the sink but his job ? No way in hell he’d ever let anyone try to tell him what to do about his career.   

Emily sighed “Tim, I didn’t mean it like that at all okay ? I just meant it in the sense that there’s life after wrestling, a chance-”   

“I’ve heard enough” Tim said shortly “I um I gotta go, I’m late for some stuff down at the performance center. I’ll see you tonight”  he leaned over and kissed her forehead leaving   

He put his bag down in the locker room as he got ready and nodded at Oney “You look all sunburnt, were you at the beach ?”   

“Maya’s” he answered, lacing up his shoes “She had a small get together yesterday on a boat to celebrate her 26th birthday. The sun got the best of us” Oney chuckled   

“It was her birthday yesterday ?” Tim asked changing his tone

“Not yesterday exactly” Oney shook his head “It’s this Saturday but we celebrated it early since we’ve got that pay per view to get ready for , it was why I couldn’t go to dinner with you and Emily. I went to Marcel’s because he was surprising her with that and you know she’s grown to be like a sister to me, I couldn’t miss it”  Tim simply nodded, how was it that already a year had passed by ? How was it that he didn’t even know her birthday ? “How is she ?” he finally asked

“She’s good, doing really well” Oney nodded “You know her and Marcel are just still boyfriend and girlfriend, not engaged or moved in like you and Emily. But I mean in a way you two are alike, you both just had your one year come up”

“She and Marcel aren’t like Emily and I” he shook his head. “That's comparing apples to oranges man, two totally different things. Why even bring that up ?

“Because it’s clear you still like her, do you ?”

“Yes.” Tim answered

Oney sighed, shaking his head “Then why are you engaged and moving in with this woman ? Why did you fuck up so badly ?” “I don’t know and I’ll never know” he shrugged as he left the room and stretched in the ring. All great questions he had no answers for. ******  Maya sat as she rubbed her forehead and sipped her water on the couch “Baby do you mind getting me some tylenol ?”   

“Let me guess, once again didn’t eat anything but an iced coffee all day ?” he chuckled handing her two pills and sitting next to her  

 “Haha very funny” she rolled her eyes, taking them “Just feel tired, I’ve been working back to back and it’s getting to me is all”   

Marcel shook his head and sighed “You’ve been so out of it lately, we went to dinner last week and you fell asleep on the ride there, I’m getting concerned Maya”

She held his hand and scooted onto his lap kissing him “I”m fine, just work is a lot lately. I just gotta get it together is all, schedule things out better. Plus, I still have energy for plenty of things you know. Loads of them actually…”   

“I like that” he caressed her cheek leaning to kiss her and groaning as he heard the doorbell “That would be Johnny and Candice who you invited for a swim”  “I know” she giggled as she got up “deal with your blue balls somewhere else while I show them around”. Maya got up and shook off the slight dizziness she had going to the door “Hey guys” she smiled “Come on in”  

 “Jesus you said house not mini mansion” Johnny said as he barged in and put the cupcakes on the table “Damn Maya, is this what taking off your clothes pays for, because I might just change careers”  

 Candice shook her head as she gave her a hug “You know how he is, thanks for having us over before the week gets a bit chaotic. I feel like I rarely get to see you because of how busy you are, how are things ?”   

Maya grinned and took her to her backyard and sat with her “Things have been great truly, work is great and well as you can see things with Marcel are also still amazing. He’s here a lot but we don’t live together or anything like that” she admits taking a sip of her water “I see in your face you’ve got this look, like you wanna tell me something but you’re holding back”  

 She looked up and grinned as Johnny sat in the middle of them taking a piece of cheese from the charcuterie board and chewed “So did you hear Tim’s engaged to that one Emily chick ? I mean she’s pretty but she’s not as pretty as you and she has a boring job not cool like modeling. She’s a high school teacher ,math teacher or something dumb like that, and I heard from Eli that she’s his age so you know old and apparently they moved in-”

“Johnny !” Candice exclaimed with wide eyes as she moved her eyes in her direction

“Wh-what ?” Maya said softly “I-I had no idea, I haven’t seen him since um that night at EVE but it’s been a year, come on guys. There’s no need to tiptoe around things, that’s in the past and good for him. He deserves happiness as we all do, really Candice it’s not a big deal”   Lies all fucking lies she thought to herself, nothing but lies. Yes it was a big fucking deal, how the hell wouldn’t it be ?. What in the absolute fuck did she miss out on in a whole year ? She was having success, her relationship with Marcel was perfect yet her heart still fluttered hearing Tim’s name. Not only was he dating someone but he was engaged, engaged.   “Sorry” Johnny apologized as he put his drink down “I thought you knew since you seem to know everyone, I thought Oney had mentioned it or Alli”    “It’s fine Johnny” she grinned weakly “Really it is, there’s nothing you need to say sorry for at all truly. People are allowed to move on, I mean we never even dated. It’s nothing at all, look Marcel’s on his way out let’s get in before the sun goes down”  “I got you a little surprise” Marcel grinned, oblivious to what had just occurred. He smiled and put down the box in his arms “I know you said no gifts but I thought this one would be great for you” With a confused look Maya stood up and  grinned , walking towards the box and opening it slowly, smiling wide as she pulled out a golden doodle puppy “OH MY GOD YOU REMEMBERED !” She quickly kissed the pup and jumped in his arms. For the last 6 months, she had been going on and on about how she was ready for a dog and wanted one so badly yet Marcel seemed off to the idea and kept saying how they were way too much work and not even all that cute. Now she understood why, and her heart swelled in size.   “I searched and searched the entire state of Florida for this little guy” Marcel smiled. “He's about 8 weeks old, and when I saw him I knew he was perfect for you...for us. But he needs a name, any ideas ?”    “Biggie” Maya smiled “As in Biggie Smalls ?” he laughed   “Exactly that.” Marcel smiled as he put his arm around her and pulled her in for a side hug “You, me and Biggie”. He kissed her head as he pet their pup’s head and smiled, though far off and not entirely true it felt as if they were family already. Just them and their puppy, together and happy.   

The rest of the night was enjoyable as she sat and listened to them talk about the big pay per view that was coming up, everyone going on and on about certain feuds and matches. She turned and looked at Marcel who was in mid conversation with Fabian, sending him a wink as she got up and headed inside using the excuse she needed to answer an important phone call. Like clockwork she heard the screen door lock shut and laughed “It’s that easy huh ?”   

“You’re the one who gave me a wink” he answered with a crimson face “I-I assumed, I...I didn’t mean to”   “You assumed right” she grabbed his shirt and pulled him to her as she took them into the guest bathroom “we have 10 minutes max before someone realizes we’re missing so make it last”  

 Without losing any time Marcel lifted her onto the sink and slid off her shorts, rubbing at her core as he licked his lips “fuck you feel so wet already” he whispered getting a moan in response from her

“You talk entirely too much” she kissed him ,leaning her head back against the cabinet mirror gripping the back of his neck with her hands as she bit her lip to keep quiet   

“Fuck Maya” he mumbled as he began thrust in and out “you always feel so fucking good”

She whimpered in response “Baby….Baby please”

“You like that, I know you do” Marcel pumped into her with force, nuzzling his face in her neck as he did his best to keep his moans low, tightening his grip on her hips   

“I...wow” Maya panted as they finished, him still inside of her as she looked into his eyes “You do things to me you know, lots of things”

“And I always will” Marcel grinned as he wiped his forehead and kissed her lips softly “as long as you let me” “You’re so corny, you go out first so no one assumes” she chuckled as she closed the door and fixed her makeup. She opened a drawer to look for a brush, sighing as she picked up her birth control packet that had fallen.“Every time” Maya muttered as she put it away, feeling it slightly heavier than usual and opening the pack. With a shaky breath she slipped the packet out of the sleeve and widened her eyes when she saw 7 days of pills still in their spot, she had missed a whole week of birth control in the last month ***** “Would you just tell me what’s going on ?” Tim asked as he sat on the couch with Emily “it’s been a week and you’ve been quiet, you even missed a day of work which you never do. What on earth can be going on that has you like this ?”   

“Tim…” Emily spoke, her voice small and meek “Please don’t be mad at me, please. I...I went to the doctor for those headaches and fatigue and she-she had me to a blood and urine test and told me....she told me I’m pregnant. I told her it had to be a mistake, I have a patch and we use condoms, but she said it’s only 90% effective and there’s always a possibility especially since my ovaries release eggs during ovulation and well...I’m 9 weeks pregnant” she cried

 His eyes widened as he leaned back into the couch, feeling the air leave his lungs as he tried his absolute hardest to stop from dry heaving. He sat, rubbing his palms on his thighs and nodded over and again trying to convince himself things would be okay.   

“Then you’re pregnant and that’s that, accidents happen” he said softly as he scooted closer to her and held her hand in his sweaty one “Was this what we wanted ? No. But it’s what we’re dealing with and no matter what I’m here for you Em. I...I….I love you”   

“I love you so so much” Emily hugged him as she sniffled “I never ever meant for this to happen Tim, I swear to you. I’m so scared” she sobbed into his shoulder   Tim rubbed her back and sighed “It’s gonna be okay. We’re both adults here and this is something like the doctor said could always happen. I’m with you all this way, no matter what, but I must ask” he sits up and looks at her as he peels away from their hug “D-do you wanna keep this baby ?”

“I do” she whispered “I do, and you don’t need to stay with me. You don’t even need to help I can do this all on my own”   

He gulped taking her words in as he looked in her eyes, begging for her to just push him away and say she wants him out of her life but she didn’t. She wanted to keep this child and no matter what he was gonna stick by her whether he loved her or not. *****

  Maya looked up at Marcel as they waited at the doctors office, nerves eating up at her as she squeezed his hand in her lap. Immediately after everyone had left that day she sat him down and told him she had forgotten to take her birth control for a week and had reminded him they never used condoms. Just like she had assumed he was calm and collected and assured her he’d be with her no matter what and that he loved her. She broke down in tears that night on his lap crying until she passed out from exhaustion, when she woke up she found herself in bed with him. Now here they were one week later waiting to do some tests to get official answers, they had both agreed it’d be best to get answers from a doctor rather than a test at the pharmacy.  

 She stood up as her name was called and walked in with him, doing the usual routine with blood pressure and weight and finally getting her blood drawn and completing a urine test for them. The minutes seemed like hours as she sat in Marcel’s lap for comfort leaning her head over his.

  “I’m scared” Maya whispered looking in his eyes ``What if I am and it ends like…like how it did when I was 20 ?” she finally says

 “It’s different times” Marcel assured “6 years ago you were a kid with lots of stress that caused that to happen, now it’s different. And if you are, nothing bad is gonna happen. And if you aren’t, then we can go from there” he kissed her forehead. More than anything he wanted her to be okay, for them to be okay and just put that past life behind them completely.  

 Maya nodded and pressed her forehead to his, jumping up when she heard the door open and doctor come in

  “A-am I pregnant ?” she whispered quickly

“No” the doctor said softly “You are not, your tests all came back negative, what you do have to look out for is your severe dehydration levels. Other than that you’re in great health, and to be safe I’d stay off sexual activity until you can start a new month of birth control, and please use protection” she grinned

  “Oh my gosh” Maya let out a sigh of relief as she watched his face go back to its normal color “Thank you so so much”

 “It’s your life and your choices miss” she grinned “No matter what, I’m here to guide advice for whatever you need health related.”   

Maya let out a nervous laugh as she held hands with Marcel and walked out of the office, giggling when he spun her around in his arms

  “I love kids and can’t wait to have the, but this just wasn’t the right time” Marcel said softly as he kissed her “But our time will come soon, really soon”

“Sooner than later” she smiled as he set her down and walked down the hall with him, pressing the elevator button. She hummed happily as it dinged, gulping as it opened revealing Tim hand in hand with who she supposed was Emily with a barely there baby bump. She was sure she was gonna pass out had it not been for Marcel’s hand on her back.

  “Hi” Maya said softly, being the first to speak out of the 4 “Long time to no see”   

Tim stood speechless as he stared at her, unintentionally slipping his hand out of Emily’s and putting it in his pants pocket. He could’ve sworn he saw stars at one point from how dazed he felt seeing her in person for the first time in over a year.

“Hey” he finally said in response “um hey, this-this is...this is-”

“Emily” she spoke up quietly

“Emily yes, yes” Tim nodded “Um this is Emily my fiance, Emily this Maya and Marcel my...my…”

“Friends” Marcel grinned “So nice to meet you” he shook her hand gently “and um congratulations of course, what a beautiful thing”

 “Oh thank you” Emily smiled “Just here for our 14 week appointment, making sure all is well. You guys...are you guys expecting too ? Gosh that’s extremely invasive of me, I’m sorry I just assumed since this is the OBGYN side of the hospital and you two are together” she said softly turning red with embarrassment

“Nah you’re good” Maya shook her head “Just had a scare because I forgot to take my pill for a week and apparently the idea of condoms never came to my dumb ass brain that was too busy thinking about getting laid, but no babies in this uterus thank god” she tried to joke much to Tim and Emily’s wide eyes, Marcel being the only one laughing with her 

 “Alright tough crowd” she muttered to herself as she went through the middle of them into the elevator “But I wish you well, babies are super cute and stuff”

Emily grinned at her “You’re the sweetest, thank you ! Maya right ? Were you in a spread in Cosmo last month ? With the neon bikini in the pool for the safe sex while on vacation side ?

  Maya chuckled darkly.  She knew it was a dig, a sad attempt at one at least. “That’s me, that’s definitely me ! Got 20k for that spread, put a downpayment on a home with that shoot. I also did Maxim and got on the cover of that, I’m in Zara as well on a 10 foot poster right as you enter their store, and I just did a Victoria Secret ad that’s gonna be in every single mall in the states and that alone is probably gonna pay off my entire mortgage. You know, I did it once before in college and it paid off all my student loans too” she smiled “Now what is it that you do...M’am ?”

 Tim’s eyes widened as he watched the verbal drag go on, part of him knew he should’ve stepped in but he was too in shock to do a thing. “She’s a teacher” he answered sternly “A high school math teacher”

  “Still have those loans, but I love what I do” Emily nodded “It’s done for the love, not for the money” she hit back

“Aww” Maya put her hands to her heart “I remember when I used to say that too, I wanted to be a teacher so bad when I was teensy” she grinned “Then I realized how all teachers grew up to be nothing but bitter divorcees who thrive on making children’s lives miserable all whilst teaching pointless things like the Pythagorean theorem. Oh wait , that’s you ! My bad, my bad”

Marcel chuckled quietly as he bit the inside of his lip and moved his arm around her waist “We must go now, um congratulations on your child once again. Health and happiness for you both”. He smirked as he closed the elevator door and shook his head

  “Too far ?” Maya asked

“Just enough to piss her off” he answered back with a grin   Maya chuckled and looked down at her heels, trying to hide the disappointed in her face.

[getseriouser]

20 THOUGHTS: Anti anti-social behaviour behaviour

WOW that escalated quickly 

A Carlton muppet gives an umpire some constructive criticism and next minute the crowds are in uproar like they’re hostages within their own leisure.

I can sort of see both sides on this one, firstly AFL has actually been copping the Soccer’s fair share of negative press for crowd violence and misbehaviour, subsequently security firms have adjusted strategy. But if Joffa claims he won’t go to the footy, on a bye weekend, then it must be serious.

Oh yeah, and the footy onfield’s not bad either, in case anyone still cared about that.

 1.       A little bit of nanny state, a little bit of overreaction. Melbourne has been a nanny state for years, only a matter of time before it crept into football. And that’s the blame of authorities, the AFL is a client, an influential client, but they aren’t dictating to security firms how they do their job. Go tell a bouncer after midnight how to man the door and see how he takes that.

2.       But also, and to defend Gil on one point and one point only, this extra security has been around for a while, not just last week. You’ve never really taken notice of the wrinkles on your thumb knuckle before, but I betcha you just did and will again on and off for the rest of the day. We never notice security at games before but now its all we’re looking at because of the uproar. Don’t be fooled. It’s not right, but its not new.

3.       But Gerard Healy was right Monday night, Gil needs to be better. Calls for his resignation from minimum wage heroes in the suburbs need to realise the job’s a bit more complex than just reading the Brownlow votes out in September. But he isn’t so busy today’s press conference could not have been earlier, more so the concession it might be something ‘to look in to’, without the need to accept fault, could have come a lot earlier. Basic PR mistakes there, that’s all... Carry on.

4.       My main issue with Gil though is one not being spoken about, buried by the sexy headline of crowd non-issues: gambling. We all know far too many who have suffered to the plight of problem-betting, and right now the AFL has an amazing opportunity for a landmark moment.

 The official gambling partnership rights are up, BetEasy have been paying $10m a year for those, and for the AFL to say that at the end of this contract no such futher partnership would be pursued, akin to clubs too moving away from gambling revenue, would be quite something.

 But no. The AFL says a new deal is imperative as it helps them monitor integrity. Given Jaidyn Stephenson’s issue that’s breaking today I can see that point sorta, but don’t put your hand out for a eight-figure cheque for the assistance. Poor, poor, poor.

5.       And on the big issues, like serious issues, how many more players need to step away from the game for ‘legitimate’ mental health issues before we look into doing far more proactively. Lin Jong is just the latest of an increasing amount who are taking time out such is their predicament – it’s really unsettling.

6.       So Benny Stratton went the pinch. Well we don’t have capital punishment anymore but sure, on this occasion we need to make an exception, clearly? Please, its pinching, not the Kyoto agreement. Either pay the free kick early and he stops, or if Orazio swats him one in retaliation, then retaliation is an excuse and what happens on the field stays on the field. If Stratton gets weeks tonight for that because we’ve started noticing it, when he has done it for years, that’s ridiculous. Simple. Pay the free, or let players settle grown men issues out as grown men. Next.

7.       Jon Ralph. What Kent Brockman would look like if human, brunette and with far less credibility. Hawks vice-skipper and all round likeable jet Isaac Smith answered the delicate Stratton-pinching issue with line and length answers, so old Ralphy called Smith out for showing embarrassing leadership. I won’t whack Jon too much on this, clearly a bad day, realised once again his smile looks more like one’s pose mid-flatulence. Please Jon, we don’t ask for much.

8.       Quick one on the cricket – why hold a summer sport World Cup, like cricket, in a shit country where its Winter all year round. Instead of Finch and Warner opening our innings next game we’d be better off with Michael Klim and Daniel Kowalski. How’s Murray Rose going, is he still with us, and can he bat 3? Bloody hell England, sort your bloody rain out, its making me itch.

9.       Thursday night footy – we cop it what, half the year when you take into account the opening game of the season, Easter, then this mid-year crap when the byes happen. But given that it’s rating like an absolute beauty, and as long as broadcast revenue is by far the most important dollar the code seeks, I’d expect every round, as soon as next year, to have Thursday night football. Don’t say I didn’t warn you early.

10.   Ross Lyon, geez quick to whack the Boss when he took the early rebuild call so soon after their maiden Grand Final appearance, along with the four-year extension. Ross can’t rebuild, they said. Ross is going down a hole fast, they said. Well, this is the third of those four years and the Dockers are going beautifully. Good kids, nice new team, good team and look on for finals this year and the trajectory is only up from there. We await the apologies.

11.   Jesse Hogan, whilst we are talking purple, gee if he can get going that’s at least one winning final this year for the Dockers. Has genuine match winning attributes, and for a while he was either too young, too injured, or just playing for a team ‘too Melbourne’. Now, bit of fitness, bit of touch, playing away from a club charged for tanking, and look out. Hogan wins a Coleman for Freo one day, promise you.

12.   Essendon, nice, not pretty on Friday night but nice. Seventh best % after 12 rounds suggest you’re going ok. They’ve got two tough ones next in West Coast and GWS, but until the Pies in the last round have five bankable wins in between, and that’s just one short of a guaranteed finals spot. Should do it, their % is almost half a win in itself.

13.   Speaking of the Giants, I know Geelong deserves nothing else but strong favouritism for the flag, but the orange tsunami would need to somehow catch small pox to not win a preliminary final this year minimum. Nine games left, one which is a home game to Collingwood, everything else is there’s to lose Only other games against current top 8 teams are Brisbane in Sydney and Richmond in Melbourne. Will finish top 2, two home finals, boom, Geelong, Collingwood, last day in September, good luck.

14.   Rhycey Shaw moves to 2-1, but that first loss wasn’t a disgrace, the Giants are as good as there is so his stocks don’t take too much of a hit. Five of the last nine games for North are winnable, so if he can somehow muster a 7-5 record by the end of August he is a massive chance, ‘godfather offer’ to Horse Longmire to one side (got no read on that either way). However, Shaw goes 5-7, then thanks for warming the seat, do you happen to have Michael Voss’s number, he isn’t in our teledex?..

15.   Tim Kelly wanted to leave Geelong last year, for reasons totally away from football. So unless something gives, that will happen again you’d think in four-months’ time. Last year he was a very good footballer and the Cats wanted two first rounders, the Eagles couldn’t do it and Freo weren’t allowed in the conversation. This year, he’s got a top 10 Brownlow finish coming, might even snatch the medal itself at this rate, and could be part of a Premiership winning midfield. Remember the Chris Judd trade, well that’s the kind of value the Eagles and Dockers will need to find. Remarkable.

16.   Eddie Betts – the greatest small forward, of all time? Surely. Only short blokes who have kicked more are Leigh Matthews and Kevin Bartlett, one is the greatest player of all time, the other played a million games, but both are rovers first. So yep, Eddie, the GOAT.

17.   Dale Morris is back this week, what a legend. Did his ACL in March, he is the wrong side of 36 years old and looks odds on for some sort of game time this weekend. What a star.

18.   Lets whack Tom Lynch again coz we can, but this time, the contract. That’s seven years at a million per. In two years’ time when he is 28 he’ll be as cumbersome as your fat uncle passed out on the couch late Christmas Day, good luck getting any value out of him, good luck moving him. Just saying.

19.   Tassie team. Done some digging. So. AFL – keen. Local logistics off field and all of that – looks fine. It’s the league logistics that will struggle. The AFL is handcuffed to the straight jacket that is the Gold Coast, and to a lesser extent the GWS (who are looking far more on track than the Suns to be fair). So even though it’d be great to pack up shop and move the Suns down to Hobart, not going to happen, they are pot committed no matter how bad the hand.

 19 teams? Doesn’t make any more money, the broadcaster doesn’t get any extra games to sell advertising so it’s a wasted resource. So you go 20 teams? That’s the preference, but where else do you go to for team 20, we want Tassie but not because the league’s currently too small, and even then, do we have another 11% of good players not playing AFL out there to fill out two more lists? Probably not.

 So, all up, Tassie is ticking all the boxes it can, but making it fit into a league that accommodates it, that’s the struggle, and it’s a very big one at that.

20.   Lastly, how can I not, but State of Origin in Perth on Sunday. Watch it. Enjoy it. But have some comfort food on hand and a sympathetic ear once you realise how good representative footy looks at that ground, and this is a neutral game. Imagine if that crowd Sunday was there for a WA team. Exactly.

[itsjaybullme]

The 12 Most Underrated Celeb Physiques Ever

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Where's the Love?

YouTube/Maxim

The greatest physiques of all time are all well-documented. Beef monsters like Terry Crews and Dwayne Johnson get all the love for being massive and ripped beyond belief. But there are a handful of Hollywood stars like Hank Azaria—the voice of Moe on The Simpsons—who’ve gone under the radar concerning rips and cuts. Here’s a list of 11 overlooked lifters.

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1. Jason Statham

For such an accomplished action star, Jason Statham tends to keep his shirt on during his films. But, wait a minute…who is that scantily-clad dude dancing in leopard print underpants in this video? Looks like Statham got all of the on-screen nudity out of his system early in his career.

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2. Sean Connery

Before he starred in The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, and interviews in which he justifies slapping women, Sean Connery was a bodybuilder. No joke. He started at age 18, and trained with a former gym instructor in the British Army. Connery, according to his official website, took third in the 1950 Mr. Universe contest; however, other sources claim he placed third, or didn’t place at all, in 1953.

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3. Carrot Top

When you grow up with red hair, you’re going to get made fun of. Trust me. One solution to that plight is to get massively ripped, to the point that you resemble a kaiju more than an actual human being. Give Carrot Top credit for his build, though—he looks good from the neck down. And now it’s probably easier to lug around all those props.

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4. Dave Chappelle

The actor and former star of Chappelle's Show has shocked the world twice in his career. Once when he walked away from his hit sketch comedy show on Comedy Central, and again when he showed up a couple of years later looking absolutely jacked. Let's stop downplaying it, Chappelle has had one of the most stark physical transformations among celebs in recent years. What's more, he didn't need an upcoming movie role as motivation.

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5. Hank Azaria (Moe Syslak)

Why does the voice of Moe from The Simpsons need to be this jacked? Seriously? Character actor Hank Azaria is known largely for his comedic shtick—be it animated or live-action—but he could also be known for his can’t-pinch-an-inch physique, and immaculately hairless chest.

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6. Marlon Brando

The epitome of “steak and eggs” physique (before he went on to eat the weight of that physique in actual steak and eggs), Brando did a lot of shirtless work during his glory days. While most remember him as the grandfatherly-paunched Don Corleone from The Godfather, we mustn’t forget Brando’s studded physique as he yelled “STELLA!!!” to the heavens, strategically torn shirt and all.

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7. Sean Penn

Sean Penn is 57 years old and looks absolutely ripped.

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8. John C. McGinley

Karen Neal / Getty

You might remember him as one of the “Bobs” from Office Space. Or as Dr. Cox from Scrubs. But what you might not know is that John C. McGinley is a veteran action star, too, having appeared in badass form in everything from Platoon to Point Break to The Rock. It wasn’t until Wild Hogs, though, that we got a real look at his impressive physique (dude is 58!) as he eagerly hopped nude into an oasis with Tim Allen. More power!

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9. Robert De Niro

Come on, give the guy props, he's in his 70s and not afraid to pose shirtless with carved-from-stone Zac Efron. That's more than most of us can say. Two boxing flicks (Raging Bull, 1980, and Grudge Match, 2013), gave us a look at Robert De Niro’s evolving body. As Jake LaMotta (Raging Bull), he was wiry and ripped. As Billy “The Kid” McDonnen (Grudge Match), he’d put on some weight, but was still noticeably cut. We could all only hope to keep flexing for so long.

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10. Bruce Lee

The martial arts legend was ripped. Why? According to sources and historians, Lee was adamant about training in “functional strength”—the practice of building strength that could readily be converted to power. Martial artist Dan Inosanto, a close friend of Lee’s, recalled how Lee would size-up massive bodybuilders and ask, “Yeah, he’s big…but is he powerful? Can he use that extra muscle efficiently?” And, possibly, “Will his poster be on the wall of every freshman dorm room ever?”

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11. Drake

Frank Hoensch / Getty

Drake has been one of the biggest names in music for quite some time now, and just as his popularity has grown his muscles have as well. The Canadian rapper has put on significant weight since breaking through as a musician in 2008 with the hit song “Best I Ever Had”. As Drake has just crossed into his 30s he appears to be taking his fitness more seriously as he gets older.

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12. Ludacris

Jeff Kravitz / Getty

Many facets of Ludacris' career slide smoothly under the radar. In his rapping career he’s recognized as making some of the best club-anthem and hype records of his time, but not for the technicality in his rhyming ability. In his acting career, he’s carved out a solid role in the Fast & Furious films, and he absolutely delivers. 

Over the years he’s grown from a twig-like figure under extremely baggy T-shirts to a guy who fills out the sleeves on his shirts pretty easily.

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