#kaiwinterson

[rosiebutler]

closed starter for @kaiwinterson

   curtains close,  doors open.  fresh air from the lobby breezes in  &.  beckons from the top of the staircase.  when the dim lights raise,  you recognise this moment,  don’t you?  a show ends and the hive mind’s next line of sight is on getting out first.   because who the hell wants to get stuck behind the mob?  sid's no better.  consider her a caged animal,  lunging for the open gate.  and look,  for some reason she expected her friend to immediately find place behind her.  but nobody is quite as fidgety as her  ( did you notice her restless foot throughout the whole entire show?  ...sorry kai. ).  and nobody is quite as patient as her friend.  kai’s still in the stands,  giving way,  while she’s jogging up the stairs. a quick promise is thrown in his general direction,   “ i’ll get us the best seat at the bar,  yeah?  “      as though there’s any chance to counter it when sid has just as quickly vanished.   promise is upheld,  though;   these bar stools have a back and an arm rest, and she’s getting all comfy in them when he catches up.  sid spins on the swivel chair,  beaming grin ‘n all.   “  so ... how did that rank,  mister movie extraordinaire?  “  she slides him his rum ‘n coke,  quirking a brow.  theatre and films are two very different things.  but ...  still.

[nicholassimonjakubowski]

1 / 15 / 40

1 … First kiss?

“Ah, man. First real kiss?” It’s presented with a laugh and that iconic Simon far away look, considering, maybe even a bit embarrassed. “It was like... eighth grade, maybe? It was one of those uh... ‘experimentation’ things, I guess. I had a friend over for a sleepover and it was sorta like... fuck.” He laughed again, sort of exasperated that he was even talking about this. “We sorta pretended it wasn’t happening and then never talked about it again? I don’t know. It’s embarrassing. Let’s move on.”

15 … First heartbreak?

"That’s... a little tricky. ‘Cause there’s the first time I thought my heart was broken and there’s the first time I realized I had no idea what I was talking about the last time.” A considerate infliction, a brief pause. “The time I thought someone broke my heart was in high school with my girlfriend at the time, she broke up with my and had sex with my best friend which like... artificially devastated me and I listened to a lot of Eminem for two weeks. The first time it actually happened had to be Tyler. Sorta put things into perspective.”

40 … Last time you lied?

“My whole crew at work has been lying at work for like a week and a half, we’re getting paid double time to do this job that we already finished. The best part is they keep telling us how good we’re doing. I think we could probably keep it up ‘til Thanksgiving. The key is if you look busy — you are busy. At some point I just started carrying around random shit, ever seen a welder with a paintbrush?” 

[sydneyquin]

𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑.   @kaiwintersons​      last week was…   well…  SOMETHING ( shitty ) !     it’s been two nights since the last grimace at its thought.  shame is easier swallowed these days …  for this we thank decades of practice.  it doesn’t loom around the house of her mind like poltergeist on creaky ground.  it does influence where she takes him tonight.     sid flashes the man in her passenger seat that toothy grin.    it’s the sort that shows her youth,  when eyes cannot.   tupac sings them his california love.   it’s,  of course,  a classic… yet mostly done to make her friend squirm.  he doesn’t seem the gangsta rap kind and who else is gonna put it to the test?          “  so,   smart dude.   any guesses where we’re going tonight? “  with the wiggly brows.     he’d requested out of town.   have you noticed?   rules are nudges in the technically right  / definitely boring  direction.   at least they are in her neck ‘a the woods,  and hell—-  they’re knee-deep in the undergrowth with sid’s hands on the wheel.  

[julienesbit]

@kaiwintersons​

julia knows matt by the smell of cheap cologne he rides in on.  matt though, might not have been expecting her.  she usually works the nightshift, but this shitty, bright saturday morning, she’s called into the diner at the crack of dawn (11am, the horror).  let the smudged eyeliner and bottle of ibuprofen that rattles in her purse prove as evidence of the well-spent night beforehand.  the effects of her hangover seem to double when her least favourite (but best tipping) regular strides in.  the dark-haired man who accompanies him isn’t of note, to julia.  she’s much more focused on the sleazy problem that sits beside him.  but luckily for her, the usual leering and crude compliments are put on ice, for the sake of his company.  embarrassed, are we?  clearly.  no sooner had he come in, does matt provide an excuse to leave.  he slams down a meagre pile of cash on his way out, leaving his companion to dine alone.   “ oh c’mon, are you fucking kiddin’ me?! ”   julia complains, loudly.  making her rounds to clear the table, she picks up the scant pile of crumpled dollar bills left behind for her.  a poor excuse for a tip, but especially from matt.  she will direct her ire to the next best thing: whoever this asshole is who came in with him.   “ hey, listen -- tell your buddy, yeah? ... if he’s gonna come in here every day of the week that ends with a ‘y’ and stare at my ass, he better keep paying me like it. ”

[shamisani]

“Yeah, if you wanna be bored to death-” Shami stands by the bar, voice a little too loud for someone who’s on a group call with the boys to help the only single out with picking the right movie for his date tonight. 

“Sleeping in The Abyss, that’s a good one.” He laughs heartily. “Dude, seriously, I struggled to keep my eyes open. It made, like, no sense? And nothing even happens... Literally, bro, if you can’t sleep at night, just turn that shit on... Yeah, she’s hot... Really? In Phoenix? I don’t think I’ve ever seen him... What does he look like? Send a photo.” Shami checks his phone, thinks for a second and shakes his head. “Nah, never seen him... Alright, buddy, good luck. Let us know how it goes.” He ends the call and looks up to call the bartender over so he can order his drink.

@kaiwinterson​​​

[rosiebutler]

𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑.   @kaiwinterson        last week was...   well...  SOMETHIN’ !     it’s been two nights since the last grimace at its thought.  shame is easier swallowed these days ...  for this we thank decades of practice.  it doesn’t loom around the house of her mind like poltergeist on creaky ground.  it does influence where she takes him tonight.      sid flashes the man in her passenger seat that toothy grin.    it’s the sort that shows her youth,  when eyes cannot.   tupac sings them his california love.   it’s,  of course,  a classic... yet mostly done to make her friend squirm.  he doesn’t seem the gangsta rap kind and who else is gonna put it to the test?           “  so,   mister smart dude.   any guesses where we’re going tonight? “      he’d requested out of town.   have you noticed?   rules are nudges in the technically right  / definitely boring  direction.   at least they are in her neck ‘a the woods,  and hell----  they’re knee-deep in the undergrowth with sid’s hands on the wheel.  

[sydneyquin]

  𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑.   @kaiwintersons​

  this is the epitome of power.   sid dons sheer lace,  slithering down each wrist.  sid,  taller than most of the men here in these fuckin’ boots.  sid,  managing in spite of them,  to execute the perfect time warp.  not just once.  not just twice.  oh no,  this vampire-demon-whatever queen is a professional. she’s reaching the hundred mark.  about every kid in this place has filtered in and out of her dance corner, but none so much as wednesday and pugsley addams.      kai,  always a man on the outside looking in,  and always a man--- no wings or tails or horns tonight--- leans back and observes.  unfortunately,  sid loves this man,  which means there’s no escape from her torture.  did he seriously think he’d get away without busting a groove tonight?  like a true sadist,  sid waits until the last ten minutes of this set before reeling in her hook.  while seven year olds are jumping to the left,  sid puts good use to her power.  it comes in eye-level request with the kids more family by now.  well.  request is one word.  bribe is another.     “ go on,  get old man over here,  will ya?  ---there’ll be a pack of tim-tams in it for BOTH of you ---- if you can make it happen.  “   with that deadly wink,  made all the more deadly with blood on her face and horns in her hair.

[sydneyquin]

@kaiwintersons asked, 𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐒 : if your muse could convey one last message to someone they have lost or left behind , what would it be ?

    in a letter, that,   “  death hasn’t gotten in the way of my unconditional love.  i know how it looks.  i know.  but you have not been forgotten and you will never be replaced.   i just need stories to tell you,  for when i see you again.  and i can’t wait for that day...  but i have to.  “  for them.

[sydneyquin]

@kaiwintersons asked, 𝐃𝐀𝐈𝐒𝐘 : did your muse ever feel as though their innocence had been lost ? what moment in their life could be described as the end of their innocence ?

    oh,  sid’s innocence is long gone.  certain actions argue that she tries to get it back,  like the heart and soul she pours into friendships  ( it doesn’t matter what time it is,  if it’s before a big presentation,  if she urgently needs downtime--- if a friend needs a lap for their head,  fingers to stroke their hair,  sid is that bitch  ).   but innocence isn’t something you can leave and then return to,  it’s something that,  when gone,  is gone for good.  it’s thinking the world is one way,  then watching the curtain drop year by year / act by act.   childhood neglect chipped away at innocence,  her father raising a prettier,  white girl in the same suburb (the nerve),  did some too.  losing a child did a lot.  a chunk of it,  limb-sized.  the last remnants are lost when oneself is also lost.  external attack can damage it, sure,   but the total dissolution of a soul comes from your own decisions.  the rid of faith in yourself is the death of innocence.  so sid lost hers,  truly,  some point in a drug haze.  it wasn’t felt until rehab,  when guilt ate her stomach whole and she admitted to herself (and not to others) the women she had thrown under the bus to escape consequence,  the trauma she had allowed done to her body.  lying,  stealing,  manipulating,  cheating.  the sheer weight of it scrapes clinging innocence off the bottom of a pan.  the pan blackened and on fire.        it isn’t a bad thing.  sid would take the way she is now for innocent.  there’s a reason she doesn’t gravitate towards men that hurt her,  and substances that do too.  should a shadowed figure approach this woman in an alley,  they should be afraid of sid.  sid and her mace,  her switch blade,  her keys always poised between each finger,  above each knuckle.  sid wouldn’t take innocent for safe.

[sydneyquin]

@kaiwintersons asked, 𝐀𝐋𝐎𝐄 : how does your muse handle grief ?

    denial is the best blanket to cling to.  it’s warm,  some protective force field that shoulders the whole-body-felt sting of loss.  the death of her daughter witnessed sid still setting ivy’s place at the table,  still washing and hanging up her dresses,  hell,  even starting fights should rich leave without the baby-seat in the car.  as days of this behaviour turned into weeks and her husband’s grief clashed with her own,  rich’s patience expired.  when denial was no longer an option,  sid became ravenous;  toxic and verbally abusive,  it would have been the sole reason for their divorce,  had she not dabbled in drug use quicker.     TLDR:   not well  (ft. denial and drug abuse).