#lensman tags: ruminations

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Headcanon: Titan Camera likes baths

TCam is more waterproof than the other two Titans (the other two are waterproof enough to fight in the rain, but they don't like it), because CCTV cameras have to work outside in all weathers. TCam was the first and most experimental Titan, so she had problems with overheating and with her gravity engines.

(I saw someone else's headcanon that the Titans probably have some sort of gravity fuckery going on, because they're so big and heavy and wouldn't be able to move as fast as they do without some kind of grav manipulation. I've folded that into my own headcanon.)

Sitting in a huge pool in her hangar helps TCam with both problems. She loves sitting in her cosy pool while her engineers scrub her down with long-handled brooms. It takes a lot of time and energy to clean and fill a Titan-sized pool, so TCam only gets to have a bath as an occasional treat. She very much looks forward to it.

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How hard is it to visit the Titan hangars if you're not a member of the engineering teams?

Cameras

The hangar has a glass-fronted viewing gallery that you can go inside, with much the same protocol as watching courtroom trials. Submit to a search for contraband, don't record or broadcast, don't bang on the glass or be a dick.

TVs

Do you have orders from the Imperator or a summons from one of the engineering team? No? Go away.

Speakers

"Yeah, go in if you want."

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My current headcanon about the Void

Not based on anything in canon, just a 'this would be cool and it's not currently contradicted by canon.'

We know (because Boom said so) that the Astros have conquered many worlds. The Void was a gift to Earth from one of those worlds. This unknown civilisation realised they couldn't overpower the Astros and that annihilation was inevitable, but they could package up their greatest achievement and launch it into space to assist the world that (this civilisation predicted) the Astros would invade next.

As this gift reached Earth, it detonated and released a huge web of secret pathways around the whole planet. The dying cilivisation fervently hoped that the inhabitants of whichever planet it landed on would learn how to access the Void-pathways, and use them to avoid the Astros. And as it happens, the TVs learned how to do just that. (How? I haven't decided yet. Maybe the answer is in the books that Lucky Cam found in Alpha Hills.)

When did this Void-package reach Earth? The 30th of June, 1908.

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Headcanons for techfolk vision

Cameras

As we can see from the episodes themselves, Cam vision is very similar to human vision! One way it differs is that when Cams are physically hit or shocked, their vision greys out with scanlines and other artefacts.

You can see a real-life example of this in this video, in which a skydriver drops a video camera and it keeps recording until it lands (in a pig pen!)

As the camera tumbles, it spins faster than its sensors can keep up with, resulting in the video turning into a series of diagonal lines. Most digital cameras record in a 'sweep', going from one edge or corner to the opposite one. It looks as though this camera records in a diagonal sweep.

This also means that Cameramen possibly don't see things like propellors and hummingbird wings as a blur, as we do - they'd see it as a choppy effect, depending on how the movement syncs with the Cameraman's framerate.

Here's a bird appearing to hover perfectly because its wings happen to match the camera's shutter speed:

As far as Cameramen are concerned, that's probably just how birds are! They don't see bird wings as a flippa-flappa or propellors as a rounda-rounda blur.

Presumably, Cameramen cannot perceive the chimerical colours, which are colours humans can see thanks to how our retinas form afterimages:

Soundkind

I headcanon that Soundkind primarily perceive the world through echolocation. It's not really possible for humans to grasp what this 'looks' like. We've all heard of Thomas Nagel's essay 'What is it like to be a bat?' But at least a bat is a mammal like us, so it'll have mostly the same neural pathways as us. It's not outside the realms of possibility that bats 'see' the world in the same colours as us, but the colours are triggered in the brain's perception by wavelengths of sound rather than light. But Soundkind aren't even animals! Who knows how a tech brain processes this data?

I also headcanon that the Soundkind can see with light to a degree, just not as well as a human, Cameraman or TVman. Their vision is low-res and is heavy on the reds (hence their use of red as an emblematic colour), similar to a human with tritanomaly.

Here's Tri-Cam, approximately as a human or Cameraman would perceive them (from this SketchFab model):

Here's how Soundkind might 'see' Tri-Cam with echolocation. (I took the 'matcap + surface' version of the model to get just the contours without textures, then noodled with it a little in GIMP.)

Here's a scene approximately how a human or Cameraman would perceive it (source):

And how it might look to a Soundkind using their visual processing - mainly red (achieved using a tritanopia simulator), and low resolution:

Here's another 3D model, a bit more colourful than Tri-Cam, as a human or Cameraman might perceive it (source):

Putting together the above info, here's how a Soundkind might perceive it using their echolocation overlaid with their optical vision:

TVs

TVs are primarily optic-based, like humans and Cameras. Their vision overlaps less with the human range than the Cameramen's vision does. TVs see further into the infra-red than humans and Cams (unless said Cams have specialised thermal vision), and their vision has much more of a purple cast, hence their use of purple as an emblematic colour.

TVs can see even in complete darkness (by our standards), because everything above absolute zero gives off IR radiation. However, an environment of absolutely uniform temperature would appear blank, because there would be no differences in IR for the TVman to see. In addition, TVs can't see the temperature of stuff behind glass - they would only see the temperature of the glass itself (same as the limitations for real thermal cameras).

My infra-red headcanon is purely based on the fact that TV remotes are usually IR-based (more modern ones use Bluetooth).

...I don't have a speculative image to show, because to my surprise I couldn't find good quality pictures online of the same scene taken with RGB and with thermal (so I can combine them the way I want them). They were all either postage stamp-sized or they didn't align properly. Hopefully you can imagine something!

This video shows something a bit like what I'm thinking of:

The video shows that the thermal cam has something called 'MSX', which combines the thermal image with the light image, giving you the thermal imaging info combined with the surface patterns from the light imaging info. However, my headcanon is closer to 'human vision (but a bit more purple) combined with a black-hot greyscale thermal image', as opposed to the purple and yellow mess seen here.

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I'm more pessimistic. I think that without a common enemy, the techfolk will devolve to in-fighting.

Also, techfolk have less incentive to reverse carbon emissions. They don't need crops, trees or algae to exist. They don't really need animals to exist. There's no incentive for them not to terraform the planet into a crystalline desert that's incompatible with life.

Some techfolk might be fond of humans and want to keep the planet in a habitable state, whereas others would have the belief that the human population isn't going to bounce back, so keeping the planet viable for them isn't a priority (especially if the techfolk believe the humans were responsible for summoning the Skibidis to begin with, via Cathy's team and their opening of the gate).

A possibility that just occurred to me: the Skibidi invasion came from the future to prevent this terraforming apocalypse from coming to pass.

Question.

What do you all think will happen when the astro's are finally defeated? Would the Skibidis and alliance go back to fighting each other or will it be a sort of tense peace? I would like to see your opinions please!^^

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My headcanons for how the Alliance factions handled their Titans' transitions from normal units:*

TV faction: handled in secrecy. 16 candidates were shortlisted, and one was selected by the Engineer Prime. The remaining 15 had their serial numbers redacted and re-issued (like how people in witness protection programs get new names), and all their shells partially broken down and reconstructed from a mixture of all the candidates' shells, so that no-one except the Titan themself and the Engineer Prime would know which candidate became the Titan.

Camera faction: it wasn't publicised, but everyone knows. The Titan's former squad will tell anyone who'll listen that their pal was selected to become the Titan.

Speaker faction: "Oh, the Titan? Yeah, she used to be unit 7460." Everyone knows. Why would it be secret?

*It's not addressed in canon how the Titans were made; I and many others have the headcanon that Titans and large units used to be normal ones. Is this the point where I tell you to read tabieeee's comic? Yes it is.

(I pulled 7460 out my arse just now, it's not a hidden-meaning number.)

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My headcanon is that these 3 are the leaders of the hardware factions.

Mainly because I love the trope of 'smol boss with giant henchmen'.

I know the fandom wiki says the titans are the leaders, but... they're clearly not? The titans are like sentient battleships who play a figurehead role.

Also (and this is just me; this is not supported by anything in canon) I see the hardware-heads as like eusocial insects, in that they're colonies led by queens. (Except the metaphor is imperfect because the hardware 'queens' don't lay the worker eggs. That would be silly.)

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I am a big fan of 'humans are the scary ones' in settings with multiple sentient species. Humanity, fuck yeah.

(I mean, we are scary. We are pack-hunting pursuit predators that, compared to our prey, do not get tired, and we are fiercely helpful to one another. Attack one human and you aggro every human in a 400m radius.)

I love the idea of lone-survivor humans and alliance units befriending each other because they have a common enemy in the Skibidis (and because they're both co-operative species and humans pack-bond readily) -- and in battle the human becomes downright terrifying with their anger and bloodlust. The hardware-heads get a reminder that a human is effectively an uncorrupted Skibidi and are grateful this human is on their side.

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Expletives and insults headcanons

I think the hardwares do use human-style expletives in addition to their own: we've heard TVs say 'shit happens', 'ugly-ass bitch' and 'shut the fuck up' in canon. Plus, the cameras use the rude middle finger gesture. They've probably picked these up from human media and/or living in human society before the war.

(Doubleplus, humans say things like 'that really grinds my gears', so if humans can use machine metaphors, hardwares can use biological metaphors. Maybe their form of 'that grinds my gears' could be 'that twangs my tendons'.)

All hardwares:

Shit, shitty etc equivalents: rust/rusty, corrosion/corroded, dust/dusty. 'You're fulla dust' = similar to 'you're fulla shit'.

'Skibidi' is a general curse word, of course. 'That's a skibidi idea' = that's a stupid/worthless idea.

Cameras:

'You're loose-lensed' = You're crazy/irrational etc.

Speakers:

'Doesn't know their woofer from their tweeter' = equivalent of 'doesn't know their arse from their elbow'.

TVs:

'Go and de-gauss' = similar to 'go and touch grass'

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Feel free to add your ideas!

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Cursed biology o'clock

Would Skibidi Toilets be classified as Homo sapiens skibidi (or some other subspecies name, such as Homo sapiens latrinus (toilet) or Homo sapiens murrine (porcelain)), or would they have to be put in their own genus? Skibidi sapiens?

Do they count as a dual organism, like how a lichen is a composite organism (made of algae and fungi working co-operatively)? Maybe the human part is still plain Homo sapiens and the toilet part counts as a separate life-form (Skibidi latrinus)?

I'm reminded of Buddenbrockia plumatellae, which is a myxozoan: a 'worm' that's genetically a jellyfish (cnidarian). They evolved from jellyfish into uni-cellular life-forms, then evolved a different multi-cellular shape from the one they had before! Looks like a wormy, technically a jelly. A skibidi toilet is presumably genetically a human, but has acquired a completely different shape.

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Petting headcanons 💕

Cameras (normal): 📹

💖 Preferred: Petting the headlamps (the torch slung below below the main head casing). They don't like having the front of it touched because you might dirty the glass/diodes; they just like having the sides of it petted and cupped in the hand.

🩷 Accepted: Petting the top of the head-casing, maybe the sides (if you're careful to avoid the converter box).

💢 Avoid touching: the glass of the casing, the converter box on the side of the head, and the cables at the back of the head.

Cameras (large): 🎥

💖 Preferred: Petting the matte box (the ridges surrounding the lens). Be careful to not touch the lens itself. It might be best to touch only the back surfaces of the matte box ridges.

🩷 Accepted: Gentle petting of the microphone stem.

💢 Avoid touching: the lens, the microphone head itself, the viewfinder and the film magazines.

Speakers (both sizes): 🔉

💖 Preferred: Gentle slow pats on the top of the head (least likely to interfere with their sound output).

🩷 Accepted: Petting the grille plate. Gently; don't push it hard enough to risk touching any components underneath.

💢 Avoid touching: the driver (the vibrating part that makes the sound) - not that you'd be able to while the grille is in place anyway. If they have a bass reflex port, don't put your fingers in it.

TVs (normal): 📺

💖 Preferred: Petting the screen gently. The TV has to trust you a lot before they'll let you do it, though. Otherwise, pets to the front corners of the head-casing are usually welcome if you're careful not to get too close to the screen. TVs with aerials are 50/50 on whether they like receiving pets to these; always check first.

🩷 Accepted: Pets to the sides and top of the head (not too near the back).

💢 Avoid touching: any dials, buttons, etc. and the ventilation holes at the back of the casing.

TVs (large): 📺

As above, plus:

💢 Avoid touching: the stems of the extra screens.

All hardware types:

💖 Preferred: hand-holding and gentle hand-rubs.

💢 Avoid touching: necks. They all have powerful swivel joints, so that's a pinch point for your fingers.

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Throwing spaghetti at the wall based on episode 74

What does the picture show that Sabre ('Mind your own business' TV) found?

At first I thought it was a simulation showing what G-Toilet would look like if upgraded to an Astro - but LucileDrakkhen suggested that it was a photo of G-Toilet crashing to Earth.

What if G-Toilet's treason was assimilating the human population into the toilet faction, in a violation of the Toilet Prime Directive? Maybe the Toilets spread through space assimilating other species but only if the civilisation agrees to it. G-Toilet saw that humanity would not be willingly assimilated... then decided to assimilate humanity and conquer Earth anyway.

Bonus random bullshit: What if G-Toilet was heading for another planet but crashed on Earth because of a signal that Alpha Hills sent out?

This leaves unanswered where the Alliance came from. Did humanity build them to repel the toilets?

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Blurry picture because this part (of episode 66) is in motion, but notice the lack of safety rails at height in TV Base. If you watch the episode you can see a few TVs walking around like this.

Headcanon time: if a TV enters freefall, they automatically teleport back to their last safe location. They do it without thinking, like how a falling cat automatically rights itself to land on its paws. Hence they're not worried about falling from heights.

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Today I learned that the Ford factories in Cologne are so big that they have three metro stations.

On the map, you can see Fordwerke Mitte, and you can see Fordwerke Süd and Fordwerke Nord further up and down the line.

Naturally, I thought 'what if the Alliance bases have a little rail network?!'

...What if it's a little monorail like at the start of Half Life 2?

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Headcanons for the Speaker Base

I reckon that the Titan's hangar is bigger than the other two Titans' because it's lined with false walls with interchanging panels that can rotate to display different textured surfaces. They can range from anechoic (absorbs and quietens sound) to reverberant (reflects and amplifies sound).

Any large open spaces (such as the Titan hangar, and the outdoor grounds of the Base) have poles installed with paddles on top, to act as surfaces for echolocation. (I've seen photos of these installed at roadsides where trees have been removed, so bats have something solid to echolocate against. I haven't been able to find the picture again because whatever I put into search engines, they think I want poles for bat roosting boxes.)

There's got to be a room something like the Reverberant Acoustic Test Facility.

I've joked in the past that the Speaker Base needs to be full of mirror balls, nightclub lighting, confetti cannons etc. because the Speakers are the Party Time faction. I hope that's also true!

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Scenes we'd like to see: Titans edition

(As I write this, the latest episode is 67 part 3.)

I want to see TCam and TSpeaker sitting in adjacent repair bays, holding hands as they both get fixed. (I doubt DFB would depict something so cute/tender but I can dream.) I need them both to be okay! (Also I want to see them both get swarmed by their tiny comrades!)

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Once TSpeaker gets patched up and is ready to formally encounter TTv for the first time as an ally, TTv starts playing EWTRTW as a 'no hard feelings' signal, until TSpeaker gets the courage to join in - with a bass-boosted version. (Maybe TCam is watching and gives a thumbs-up.)

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TCam using their core flame and TSpeaker using their core beam, then TTv comes in like 'Aw, that's cute' then CORE BLAST BOOYAH!

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Everyone assumes TSpeaker will be nervous around TTv, but the other way around is likely too - after all, TSpeaker was able to get the drop on TTv and stab them. What if they were both hugely shy and nervous around each other, so TCam sat between both of them and held hands with them both until they felt okay. (Way too sweet to appear in canon, but I like thinking about it.)

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TTv does their screeny doom thing on G-Toilet, then TSpeaker comes with a knife. So it's like an echo of the first battle, but this time TSpeaker is wielding their knife FOR TTv instead of against them.

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The one we all want to see: all 3 Titans doing that fist-bash that TCam and TSpeaker did in episode 57.

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Add more if you want.