#like a shitty computer when the fight or flight endorphins finally kick in

[bitegore]

yknow. it's funny. i may just live in a family where i actually got my necessary amount of human touch contact (too many fucking hugs. i do not wike them) and i didn't appreciate that much growing up but my god. at least i have never been one of the people who someone like, held their hand and said something nice and i immediately fell in love with them or whatever. if i were touch starved i think i would literally fling myself off a building. fuck off

[blackmentalhealth-matters]

Diary of a Stressed Black Woman

Hey yall! 

So first I wanna start off by saying thank you to everyone for all the love and support I’ve received since I decided to start this blog a couple months ago. I was really nervous to be so open and honest and you guys really made me feel like I wasn’t as crazy as I thought lol. I know I haven’t posted in a minute, I’ve honestly been kind of self absorbed in bullshit but I’m back and I’ll remain consistent this time lol. With that being said.....*ahem, clears throat* excuse me while I wild out on my soap box for a minute....I AM muthafuckin tiedddddd, i am STRESSED tf out and I don’t know wtf i’m doing with my life. I seriously ask myself is this shit even worth it anymore?!. As I wake up each and everyday and start prepare myself for the same ol routine, these thoughts often circulate through my mind. I feel like im constantly jugging that long to do list of shit that never seems to end, shitty niggas, dramatic friends, pestering family, deadlines and homework assignments due dates approaching for classes, outstanding bills due and that cloud of pressure hanging over my head. Some days I literally feel like I’m about to explode..... if you feeling anything how I’m feeling take a second as your reading this...to just B R E A T H E. I have to remind myself when I finally sit my busy body head ass down to just relax and breathe. As human beings were constantly on the go and overwhelming ourselves with shit that either can be handled differently or with adequate preparation completed with minimal stress. 

We all know how stress feels because it affects us all in almost every aspect of our life. But what exactly is stress? Stress is your body’s way of responding to any kind of demand or threat. When you sense danger, whether it’s real or imagined (mine is often imagined lol) your body's defenses kick in and your fight or flight reaction occurs. What is so crazy is stress is not always a bad thing, I honestly feel like I perform my best when I’m stressed out. I tend to work better in high fast, stressful situations. For example if I have a paper due at 11:59 my ass is scrambling to write a 5 page paper at 10:30 lol. I’ve found myself getting better grades when I do last minute shit compared to when I take my time lol. That’s honestly how I got through college, and the way my semester been going thus far seems like how I’m gonna get through grad school. (Disclaimer: plz don’t be like me, be better and do your assignments in a timely fashion lol. 

Stress starts to become an issue to your mental health when it occurs over a long period of time. Suffering from chronic stress can be extremely dangerous and start to affect you mentally, cognitively, emotional, physically and behaviorally.  Your nervous system that responds to you enduring stress cant distinguish between you being stressed over a an argument or you facing an actual stressful situation (things that are life threatening). So the more you experience that emotion of stress the more you trigger you nervous system and the more your heightened state of stress level is increase and can become exacerbated.Every system in your body is affected by stress. Ever have a huge fight your boyfriend/girlfriend and feel like you don’t have an appetite? That’s not because your sad but because your digestive system is affected. Or maybe you start to feel sick after completing a stressful ass project? Your immune system has been affected by your stress.....Stress can leave your brain vulnerable to lurking variable like anxiety and depression, that I personally know how well it’s compatible with stress. 

Our generation puts so much pressure on ourselves because of society. I often find myself setting these unrealistic goals to stay relevant with my peers, or family and mentally endure hell and stress myself out just to half way accomplish it......as a black female my risk of high blood pressure and stroke is higher than white women so experiencing this high level of stress for me isn’t good for my health in the long run....

Survey shows that even though most Americans stress level are falling

Then we look at coping mechanisms....I’ve already discussed how I negatively cope with shit in my life. I touched on drugs and reckless behavior in my last posts, but I didn’t say one of the most common things people do when they are trying to cope...especially with stress. Can you guess what it is? Eating...lol if I’m trying not to be an alcoholic or drug addict, I indulge in huge binges where I eat everything I can and pass out. Clearly this is not an appropriate response to dealing with stress.

So how does one deal with stress in a healthy manner? Well for starters, not putting too much on your plate would help. 

Honestly there’s no appropriate or specific way to deal with stress....like any other mental health disorder you do whats best for you to help you cope.

I’ve learned that mediating throughout the day has caused a huge relief. When I feel myself getting overwhelmed I just remove myself and mediate....confiding in friends and family is also always a good outlet and resource. Journaling or blogging (like me) is also a stress reliefer! Honestly typing this post has caused such a relief for me because it gives me a chance to get out of my head and read what I’m saying on a computer screen. Managing your time more efficiently definitely can help rid yourself of all that time constraint pressure your feeling as well. Physical activity is also a great way to get those endorphins bumping as well.  

*To my fellow readers who are stress, just relax! you got this! tell yourself words of affirmations daily to keep your motivation level high and stress level low. Remember God timing is always perfect and you can rush the process....

Leave your stress in 2017, that’s what I’m doing, with my new year, new me head ass lol.

**xoxo’