#like i get indulging in content that confirms your views and biases once in a while when ur feeling down

[writtenjewels]

Dance

Cullen glanced around the library looking for one particular face. He was hoping to see the man at the front desk but no such luck. Sighing, Cullen slid his book into the return bin and started going through the shelves. He did enjoy reading so these frequent visits to the library weren't entirely because of the handsome librarian. But he had to admit that he was much more eager to come by these days because of the man.

He turned the corner toward the next line of shelves and felt an excited thrill in his heart. Dorian, dark hair swept in an elegant style as always, was putting books away. He wore an outfit of blue and white today, which Cullen thought complemented his dark skin well. Dorian shifted to grab the next book and noticed Cullen. His mustache was perfectly styled too with just the hint of a curl.

“Finished your book already, Cullen?” he asked.

“Yes, I enjoyed it.” He was aware Dorian had learned his name as a show of good customer service, but it still thrilled him to hear it. Dorian's lips curled into a smile and he picked up a book from his cart.

“Here, you should read this one next. I've read it myself and found it wonderful.” Cullen took the volume with a muttered thanks. “You'll have to let me know what you think when you're finished.”

“I will.” Damn it all, why couldn't he have a more coherent conversation with this man? It was easy to talk when he was giving out orders or discussing strategy, but the idea of expressing romantic interest had him tongue-tied. Not wishing to stand there like a fool, Cullen turned on his heels and went to check out the book.

Naturally, his friends felt the need to tease him about it later.

“So did you finally talk to the handsome librarian?” Josephine wondered. “For more than five minutes?”

“No,” he was forced to admit. Varric let out a groan.

“You're hopeless, Curly. You've been pining over this guy for... what, a month now? Why don't you ask him out already, for Andraste's sake?” Cullen squirmed uneasily. He didn't know how he would go about doing that. Varric seemed to come to the same conclusion. “You know what you need? A night out. Friday, we're going out for some fun. No excuses.”

There was no point in arguing with Varric Tethras. And knowing the dwarf, his idea of “fun” was not going to line up with Cullen's. He contented himself with seeing Dorian again in the meantime. As they chatted about books, a thought came to him. If he could just ask Dorian out, he could avoid whatever “fun” Varric had in mind.

“Are you doing anything interesting this weekend?” he asked, hoping that came out as casual and friendly.

“Not particularly. I have to work my second job.” Cullen deflated a little at that. “I forgot to mention,” Dorian continued. “The library is going to be putting out a chess set for patrons. You said you liked playing, yes? Maybe you can help me break it in.”

“Play chess with you?” Cullen confirmed. Was Dorian flirting? Or was Cullen simply hoping, and this was all just the same friendliness as usual? Either way, it meant more time spent with the handsome librarian. “Yes, I'd enjoy that.” Dorian's face practically glowed in a responding smile.

Friday night found Cullen with Varric and Josephine about to enter a club. He was already regretting this before they even walked through the door. What he found inside had him nearly choking on his own tongue. There were half-naked men everywhere: walking around serving drinks, sitting on top of tables, dancing on a stage....

“Varric, is... is this a strip club?!” Cullen squeaked out.

“Yeah. I figure this was a good way to take your mind off your librarian.” Too stunned to speak, Cullen turned to Josephine hoping to get her support. But her face was alight in a grin. “It doesn't do anything for me,” the dwarf continued, “but you and Ruffles can go enjoy yourselves. I'm just here to foot the bill.”

When Cullen still couldn't speak, Varric herded him over to a table where the three of them took a seat. A waiter came by to get their drink orders. Cullen supposed that the tight shirt and short shorts could be considered a uniform, but it left little to the imagination.

“My friend here is a first-timer,” Varric informed the waiter, patting Cullen on the shoulder. “What would you recommend?” Cullen blushed as the waiter gave him a once-over.

“You have a good view of the stage. Sparkler is going on the pole in a few minutes. He's one of our best dancers.” Going on the pole...? Cullen gulped as he focused on the men sliding up and down metal poles, draping one leg around it and arching their backs. He dropped his eyes down to his lap. He was relieved that his arousal wasn't that noticeable.

There was no denying that this club hired attractive men. All varying sizes and shapes to appeal to different customers. Qunari, elves, humans, even some dwarfs. Josephine was hooting and clapping, loving all of this. Someone announced the next set of dancers and Varric nudged Cullen hard. He sighed, lifting his head again. He would indulge the dwarf a while longer before insisting they leave.

The one called Sparkler walked onto the stage and positioned himself at the pole nearest where Cullen and his friends were sitting. Cullen's mouth dropped, his heart gave a lurch in his chest, and he momentarily forgot how to breathe. That styled dark hair, the gently curled mustache, those sea-grey eyes... Cullen's whole body started buzzing. It was Dorian. The man was wearing form-fitting clothing that sparkled when he moved.

The music started and Dorian began to move along the pole. He slid his hands up its length until they stretched above his head and then he bent his back in an elegant arch. Straightening again, he sank down with legs parted until he was nearly sitting on the stage. Dorian rose up slowly, jutting his ass out as he did. Cullen gaped, spellbound. He was likely biased but he could see why Dorian was one of the best: he had a way of moving that displayed his body in a sensual, almost teasing way. Making the crowd hungry for more.

Off to one side a group of men were cheering and calling for Dorian to start stripping. Cullen glared at them. Dorian placed a hand on his chest and pretended to swoon. He winked at the group and ripped his shirt off in one tug, throwing it toward the delighted men. Now Dorian was bare from the waist up. Cullen was finding it more difficult to breathe. He'd seen half-naked men before-- hell, he'd seen a completely naked man before when that one recruit lost his armor. But seeing Dorian like this, beautiful and glistening under the stage lights, was quite a different matter.

It struck Cullen that he might not have reacted so strongly if he didn't know Dorian from the library. Superficially, yes, the man was just as attractive as every other employee in the club. But Cullen had heard his laugh, seen his smile, knew some of his interests. Seeing the friendly librarian like this only added a new layer to the man. Dorian was stretching himself on the pole again, displaying his body shamelessly. His head was tilted up, his lips parted as if caught in pleasure. Cullen felt a stir of desire inside him. He wanted to be the cause of that pleasure...

Dorian was gliding his body down the pole and Cullen followed the progress. The man's legs were spread wider and Cullen leaned forward. Keeping his back pressed against the pole, Dorian trailed his fingers down the planes of his chest and stomach. Cullen's breath hitched in excitement. Dorian's eyes slowly opened, his expression hooded and sultry for whichever man he happened to be focused on. And his eyes met Cullen's.

Cullen saw the moment when the persona of the wanton seducer dropped. Dorian's eyes went wide and his mouth opened again, in surprise this time. It was hard to tell with the body oil glistening on him, but he might have even been blushing. Dorian wet his lips and rested his hands on his knees. He ran them up the insides of his parted thighs, Cullen following the progression. His eyes darted back up to Dorian's face. The man's eyes were still locked on him and he was breathing heavily. Not, Cullen thought, from the exertion of his dance.

Cullen wet his own lips and swallowed. His eyes went back down to Dorian's spread legs. The man's fingers gripped onto his inner thighs and tugged. The trousers ripped off, revealing his legs and the small bit of cloth covering his crotch. Cullen nearly fell out of his chair. He managed to recover but he had to get a hand down and press against the straining bulge between his legs. Dorian noted that and shuddered a little. His mouth moved in a deliberate forming of Cullen's name, spreading his legs out even wider, throwing back his head and arching his body.

Thoughtlessly, Cullen rubbed the heel of his palm against his clothed erection. Some part of his mind was aware he was still in a club and other men were drooling over Dorian right now, but it was all background noise. All he could see was Dorian stretching, sliding up and down the pole, displaying his body for Cullen. He continued rubbing and Dorian's eyes kept centering on him with every dip and sway he took on the pole. The song ended far too soon. Dorian swept a bow, again lingering on Cullen, then turned to the group who had his shirt.

“Well,” Varric spoke up, reminding Cullen that he wasn't alone after all, “you seemed to like that one, Curly.”

“Yes,” Cullen agreed, clasping his hand tight over his rock-hard erection. “I suppose I did.”

[a-student-out-of-time]

(Mod, can this anon just say I really appreciate how much self-control you have? When that Haiji defender showed up on your blog, you just said "get off my blog". This anon really appreciates how you didn't scream at them, accuse the person of secretly being a pedophile themself, tell them to kill themself or to choke on broken glass, encourage your followers to harass Haiji fans, etc. Today's generation of pop-culture-fandom could learn from your example.)

//Now that you bring this up, if you’ll indulge me, I’d like to talk for a bit about fandom toxicity.

//There is, in a way, a feeling of entitlement and ownership when it comes to characters or properties. That, because these things hold a special place in our hearts, that they belong to us and that our interpretation of them is the correct one and that anyone who disagrees is wrong.

//So when there comes creative decisions or opinions made by others with those properties, even ones by the actual creator of the work, that don’t match up to our own, there can come a feeling that these are a direct attack against us as well. With that comes a lot of the worst parts of fan culture: harassment, insults, bullying, threats, and even actual attacks on these people.

//But the truth is, these people were probably just expressing their feelings and emotions about the same work, because they enjoy it too. They were never trying to directly or indirectly attack you, they just simply had a different opinion. It’s important to keep that in mind: the people you talk to online are human beings with thoughts and feelings of their own, and those feelings are rarely going to be the exact same as yours.

//An unfortunate part of the problem are the inherent psychological biases that we all have, and confirmation bias especially. Where we’ll focus on information we agree with (even if it’s factually wrong) and ignore anything that conflicts with that (even if it’s factually correct). This goes beyond just fandom, but I’m going to stay on topic.

//There is not a single human being at any point in history who hasn’t been guilty of these biases. You, me, everyone you’ve ever met, we’ve all done it at one point or another. The issue is when these biases get us to leap toward intolerant conclusions about those whose viewpoints we disagree with. “You don’t have the same opinion as me, so you must be stupid/evil/bigoted/brainwashed/etc.”

//It can be so easy to draw those conclusions about people, especially when the arguments aren’t well-structured and you’re in the heat of the moment. But let’s be real: we’re never all going to 100% agree on everything. And that’s okay. Hell, if we did, that sounds more like a dystopian nightmare scenario where free thinking has been suppressed.

//And thinking is an activity I’ve always encouraged. Toxicity is ultimately at odds with critical thinking, where any dissenting opinion is hunted down and suppressed and anyone who speaks up is bullied into silence. That is not what my blogs are about. It does kinda make me sad that I’m being praised for not being a toxic asshole, because I don’t really feel like that’s praiseworthy. I want that to be a normal thing.

//Here’s an experiment: take your favorite DR character and ask yourself why you like them. What is it about them that drew you to them? Their personality? Their backstory? Their role in the narrative of whichever game they were in? When you have those reasons in mind, consider the following: what about this character is flawed? What about them is inherently dark or troubling? Why might someone else dislike them?

//And then work backwards from there: take your least favorite DR character and ask yourself why you dislike them. Then find all the ways why someone else might like them without diving straight into intolerant conclusions. Look past the surface and dig a bit deeper to see what exactly makes them tick.

//That’s not me asking for essays, that’s something I want you all to consider for yourselves.

//I’ll be the first to admit I really disliked Junko. I didn’t consider her all that interesting of a character or a villain, and she just cames off as very annoying and overblown to me. I considered everything that she sets in motion to be far more interesting. 

//I have, however, seen a lot analyses and in-depth looks at her as a character and after going through those, I came away with a lot of insights I didn’t even consider before. My opinion hasn’t changed too much, but I can definitely see (DR3 notwithstanding) all the way she can and does make for a interesting villain.

//So the takeaway is, even if you don’t end up changing your opinion, you can at least say “I still disagree, but I’ve gained some perspective into why someone would feel this way and I’m better for it.” Critical thinking does not mean you have to give up your opinions, and there does exists a very wide middle ground between total agreement and toxic harassment.

//But critical thinking is at odds with the idea that it’s best to retcon, ignore, or fabricate details of canon that we disagree with to justify those opinions. This is why I got so mad at the anon who claimed Haiji was talking about fictional underage girls, something that is not at all substantiated by evidence in the game. You can’t simply ignore these details because you don’t like them.

//Critical thinking is about being able to either say, “Okay, I fully acknowledge that these details about this character I like are problematic and I understand why it might upset people, but they’re not the sole or central reason why I like this character”, or “Okay, after careful analysis, maybe I was wrong about what I originally thought about them.”

//Me personally, I look at these details and ask “Okay, but how can we build off of this? Can we tell a new story with it?” For example, while SDRA2 Chapter 0 left a bad taste in most everyone’s mouths, I didn’t want to just retcon it. Instead,  thought Kokoro being regretful over her actions and wanting to reconnect with her daughter would make for a very interesting story.

//But the most important part of this that I’d want anyone to take away is that it’s important to listen to others and consider their viewpoints as well, and again without immediately jumping toward conclusions and talking over them before they make their case. Listen to people, ask them questions, and remember that on the other end of the conversation is another human being with thoughts and feelings of their own.

//Now, there is that invisible fear that “understand that others have different opinions” is shorthand for “just accept that some people are into r*pe/inc*st/p*dophilia and let them make content of it.” I promise you that is not at all what I’m suggesting here. I hope my previous angry rant about Haiji cemented that fact.

//What I am saying is that we need to be acutely aware of both the thoughts and feelings of others and those of ourselves. That it’ll be better for us as well as others to apply critical thinking and careful insight into our opinions, not taking them as inherent fact simply because we hold them, and understand that others will not always enjoy the same content the same way we do.

//And most importantly, being able to separate those who are willing to listen vs. those who’ll prefer to stay toxic, bitter, and unmoving is a very important skill to learn. There is no shame in withdrawing yourself from any sort of talk with a person who upsets people for fun, and it will be better for your health in the long run.

//Finally, let’s be real, what’s gained from arguing with people online? People who you never have and probably never will meet? Not much. But if someone is not going to budge and only wants to share their toxicity with the world, it’s better for you to simply walk away, block them, cut yourself off, and move on. Their toxicity is their deal, and it doesn’t have to be yours.

//But I also think there are people who are willing to listen, who may simply not know that they’re engaging in things that are hurtful or toxic. And some frank but kind insight as to why can change their opinions. A willingness to listen, not to just defend their position, is what’s important.

//I’ll be completely honest here and say I was in that position once. I’ve said and thought some awful things before, and I feel so fortunate that I met the right people who stopped me from going down that road before I got too far. Not with hostility or arguments, but honest and kind discussions and insights.

//As fans and as people in general, we can, should, and need to be better. That’s why I don’t want my space to be full of hate and bullying, but just storytelling and creative discussions, where people are welcome to express their opinions, and even if we disagree, that’s alright. We’ve at least gained some insight into each others’ views ^^

//Compassion and wisdom are what I consider the most important virtues, and being more critical of ourselves is how I think we can solve the issue of fandom toxicity. That’s what I’ve tried to apply here. My goal is just to tell a good story for you all to enjoy here, and I appreciate each and every one of you who’ve followed, liked, reblogged, or even just considered any of my posts worthwhile to read

//And if you made it all the way through this, I hope you’ll consider everything I’ve said here as well. You can’t change every single toxic person out there, but you can change yourself for the better and encourage others to do the same.

[thisiswhereiwriteaboutyou-blog]

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