#like thats not a valid reason. anyway she clearly feels more abt me than i do abt her but i also kind of implied previously id be ok w

[oatbugs]

ok so heres what happened

[normal-thoughts-official]

Wait you said you watched the Rourke ending in youtube? Ahhshshsjs that makes a lot of sense, but I replayed that chapter so I could briefly experience them, my final choice was mc ending but not for more noble/reasonable reasons like yours (it makes more sense/the others are happier) but because I'm dramatic and I want to see them grief mc dramatically (cough-not-like-ilitw-cough) 10/10 also Quinn and Michelle seemed way closer ? Which was a nice bonus and I've enjoyed a few fanfics of them (in a lor of cases as secondary couple but nice)

Wait what are your thoughts on alestair and Estella being half siblings? Or honestly give me all your thoughts on all the crazy things because there were so many plot points, I wasn't as good as a detective as you so our thoughts were probably different <3

Also if you don't have a li Diego is the one being with you in most moments (my bff <3) and it's really heartbreaking watching all the moments when they pass all together, recommend also watching in youtube

i watched it on youtube yeah. i replayed the last chapter to check out the endless' ending but i disliked it so much i replayed AGAIN just to pick vaanu's ending again lmao jdndidm but i wasn't willing to pick rourke's. tbh i wasn't even that interested until i saw a fic that was set in rourke's ending and i was like alright i should probably check that out. i was glad i didn't pick it even to check it out cuz once it said the vaanti were in c*ncentration camps i was filled with so much disgust i dont think i couldve lived with myself if i picked that one, even out of curiosity, lol

also ur reasons are valid lmaooo. i never played ILITW sacrificing the MC (like rip noah i love u but i dont think MC sacrificing themself even makes sense in ILITW) but ive seen many ppl complain that we aren't mourned jdndidndidndod thats gotta suck

and yess quinn and michelle!!! i think i mentioned before that i shipped them quite a bit (michelle/quinn/grace ftw honestly, also like i said michelle was such a RAGING lesbian to me, her energy with every single female character was off the fucking charts). once im gone inhaling variego fic quinn and michelle are definitely next on the list

as for estela and aleister being half siblings, i DEFINITELY didnt see that one coming. altho to be fair i didn't give it a lot of thought. but it made sense i guess? idk i didnt have that many thoughts abt it other than well, at least that explains why estela is so light skinned. cuz like i love her and shes gorgeous and all but seriously. i know that there are latines who are that light skinned but no more fictional light skinned latines the world has evolved past the need for fictional light skinned latines. just once i want to consume media with unambiguously brown, clearly indigenous latines - you know, like most of us are. and estela is COLOMBIAN. like come ON man

but anyway! i think it made sense but not really in a "wow, this explains so much" way, u know? more like damn ok im accepting this. which is not a bad thing necessarily but yeah. im pretty interested in finding out how estela dealt with that knowledge afterwards, tho. like she had dedicated so much of her life to killing him and then she finds out he's her dad. which doesn't change how she feels about him in the slightest but does make her revisit everything she thought she knew about their relationship. and to know that her own father had her mom killed has to be. oof. i feel so sorry for her. she's gone through so much and she deserves to be happy, u kno

and yes, i know!!! i want to replay it without romancing anyone cuz honestly diego might be my favorite character and im just a sucker for a good platonic relationship. honestly even romancing sean id have been so much more down for diego being the one to show up when the endless shows his memories for example, u know in that "one moment repeats over and over" scene??? i think it makes more sense if it's diego than a LI even if you HAVE one. diego's relationship with the MC is definitely the strongest one because like, he literally needed us so bad we showed up already being friends, you know? hes a part of the MC more than anyone else just because of that. and that doesnt make MC's relationship with the LIs any lesser! it can even be a "soulmates are built, not found" thing which i always think is more powerful. and diego is just... really special. and i wouldve loved to see a platonic relationship take the front seat instead of being like, plan B in case u didnt date anyone. but well

either way im excited to replay without a LI and have all these moments with diego ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ i ended up not getting a lot of moments with him cuz because of the m*d i had infinite gems so i could pick as many gems scenes as i needed and most emotional diego moments were like "backup", which i only found out later and really sucked

so i have quite a few replays lined up as i want to do one replay im livereading with my friends, one to get all the clues (i think i got like, 50-something out of the 62), one to get the platonic moments with diego, and i already did one replay without spending any gems to see what the results would be. so yeah dunddid consider me hooked on this story, damn you /j

[witchysleepingbeauty]

Hi princess! So imagine this lady who's always ALWAYS being negative abt her kids, never a kind word and only belittling, every other day, like "what did I do wrong really? What kind of kids have I raised? They're bla bla bla" with venom. And worst who doesnt acknowledge how negative + painful she is

When i try to talk to her nd ask her exactly whats the issue with 'me' or how can I help her to ease her burden as she keeps complaining how we're ungrateful or keeps comparing to other 'more acceptable in her eyes" children, she gets defensive nd won't answer properly. She says "ohhh, why don't U know that? arent u old enough to know?' and then starts ranting. when time after time ive begged her to clearly tell me, no passiv agressiveness please! it doesn't work nd i end up wondering why i even bother when im only the villain... Yes this ig is my role in her story that ive writen? confusing 😅

when I can, sometimes i try to help her even tho shes the sort who likes to stay busy so she'll find smth else to do lol, nd inside hope for her to be at least a little NOT negative today.... she either ignores or gets angrier nd goes all "hey, I didn't ask U to do that! How dare u act like u did me a favor! U think ur perfect while im just ur servant right?" when i never even intend that? i effing HATE negative reinforcement nd i feel so damn bad for her, nd shes taught me how negative reinforcement is the worst thing to use, cuz it never teaches anything only builds resentment!!

this is smth i realised that she cant be pleased, she wants to get attention what I mean is, whenever we spend time together, she is perfectly fine when we're talking abt her hobbies nd interests which tbh im NOT that interested in personally but since she likes them i like to discuss them with her nd help her out with projects. not to say "ohhh im so cool i help out with her projects look at me so kind of me! lol" its just it hurts when ur own mother doesn't even rpetend to care abt ur interests. i suspect deep down i carried this feeling of unworthiness ie if even my own mother doesn't care abt my hobbies/projects, no one will . which is why i feel so uncomfortable sharing anything personal to my rl friends cuz im so afraid theyll reject me too :(

By not caring i dont mean I expect her to listen nonstop to me. she has her own life but i mean she purposely zones out, rolls her eyes which HURT SM when i was a child, or even worst she says "im not interested" nd shuts the convo. again, at this point, idec anymore as ive learned slowly to value nd cherish my own value nd hobbies etc which is an important lesson anyway

the only thing i want is to stop her being so painfully negative LOUDLY. Yk I suspect becuz of her dwelling on whats wrong in her life, shes gotten severe numbness nd swelling in one arm? and even the doctors cant detect whats wrong! nd its hella painful nd she can't even lift it up sometimes!!!! THIS GOES ON TO SHOW HOW INNER CONSTANT NEGATIVITY CAN BE REFLECTED IN THE OUTER AKA OUR BODY!! To anyone else who cant help have negative thoughts ONLY, u gotta try to change them! Please! Bcuz my mother's pain in her arm is sometimes crazily too much! Nd this in turn, esp on days where all i hear is her gripe, its worse at night!

Anyway I was compeled to write this as a while ago i went to the kitchen for water nd from her room i heard her loudly complain nd mutter abt how her kids are "socially unacceptable" nd "dear god i pray please please don't let me rely on them in old age, i made a mistake raising them!" She's the sort whos got so many limiting beliefs that initially led to my deep unhappiness w/o knowng it was these beliefs at play eg if you dont become a certain career, youll have no security, or recently she keeps nd keeps lamenting abt not havjng 'enoufh money' (we r having kinda financial crisis due to some rlly terrible decisions by my other parent) or 'oh Im STUCK with this [bad word] family!" when she saw a movie abt someone who went on a trip nd began comparing her own life to it. She's so talented we all ask her to start an online business but she backs away nd says 'how will i ever get capital? im doomed to never have what i want' nd I myself have a bit empty wallet temporarily so i cant help her. Nyway, while im trying to fix my own beliefs, seeing her rage nd let negativity completly take over her is alarming nd worrying to me. it makes me feel negative emotions too. im not entirely confident in mastering my mind ywt. i was that overly sensitive kid at school nd i absorv her energy a lot. Those who u love the most, hurt u the most. nd i agree bcoz while im hurt by her (not that shes intentionally hurting me. THRU her im hurt), i do love her. Nd now thanks to the law ik by changing my beliefs abt things, i can change the world

My reason is i cant change her bcuz she gets hella maddened if i suggest a less negative thought. Nd she instead starts blaming me for my 'decisions in Life' which SHE would NEVERRR make oh no... -_- Nd im not saying i try to be obnoxious abt it hell no! im talking abt getting frustrated at the table talking abt smth abt a random topic, then suddenly listening to her start complaining abt e g. Some kid whos "richer" than i am heatedly! nd if i steer the convo away, nope, she keeps fuming a bit

so since i can only change myself, how the hell do i change my assumptions of her? i affirm having a great mother, happy nd open with her thriving business etc. i affirm this but i cant focus cuz doing so inevitbly makes me sad lol cuz i rmmbr how happy nd liveky she used to be before some unfortunate things in our family that started yrs ago. Which affected us all. Any advice, please? im on a mental diet hwoever the earlier incident of her complaining abt us again caused smth in me to snap. im distancing myself from her but the short times im with her there's only a strong air of disapproval, pain nd misery around her. Tbh i was like that pre-law, not knowing how destructiv my thoughts were, while she was the happy optimistic grateful one. Nd now? Im only slightly more self aware than before ie im NOT saying im able to rise in consiousness SOo much that im 'untouchable' nd buddha-like! Nor is my mom wrong bcuz she's me pushed out! its only her lvl of conciousness nd thats it. its just I don't want to cause or feel more pain or hav any excuse to curse her ,when ego sometimes takes over, anymore. im having some personal issues to take care of too, which is why this is affecting me too much. Sort of like having a weak immune system already?

I want my happy intelligent mom back. ik i got to change me... but the doing is way harder than the saying

🫀anon

Okay first of all imma say it cause I don’t think nobody else will…. Your mom is shitty…. There, I said it. She is abusive and selfish and a bad mom. No parent should ever treat their children that way and make them think they need to fix them.

Other than that yes it’s true she is your manifestation but I think it’s important to let emotions out. Be mad at her for once, stop rationalizing her bad behavior. You have the right to feel mad, angry, sad. YOUR FEELINGS ARE VALID.

I know it seems impossible to keep a mental diet when you see the negative behavior you wish to change every day. I assume you live in the same house. My suggestion is to stick to your mental diet and try to interact as little with her as possible. Go out more often or stay a bit more in your room. Every time you see a behavior from her that you don’t like, and you feel like affirming doesn’t help, close your eyes and see her hugging you and telling you all sorts of beautiful, loving things you’d like to hear from her.

You should also work on your self concept. Parental issues often manifest from poor self concept. Affirmations like “I am worthy, I am loved, I am enough, I am respected, I am cherished” work amazing.