#like the amount of trans guys i'm following that i am envious of? embarrassing.

[uncanny-tranny]

The thing that sucks sometimes about transition envy is that, I guess you almost expect yourself to "grow out" of it the more you transition. I used to feel so much envy, and it was something I hoped would stop once I transitioned medically, and while it's absolutely less frequent... man, when I experience transition envy, it's still just as bitter a cocktail as I remember. It can be hard to move past that, and almost... resent the other person/s, but what helped me is knowing that the person you're envying isn't specifically trying to make you, personally, feel like absolute shit. Just as you can't always help what you are envious about in other trans people, they can't help that they have traits or transition experiences or opportunities you do not have, you know? And absolutely, it sucks. But it's something that helped me because then it's a reminder that the world isn't Out To Get Me, you feel?

I think a lot of us can relate to the experience of transition envy, and it's shameful to admit to it, I suppose. It's hard to admit to envy in general, but it's important to not be judgemental about yourself. Your transition is as unique and beautiful and worthy as literally everyone else's and I hope you remember that forever