#like theres no way they didnt do that on purpose theres no way portuguese and spanish are too similar

[aesteasis]

do you have any brazilian literature recommendations :))?

ooohohoho yes i do, im glad you asked >:)) grab some snackies and a water bottle, this is gonna be a long post.

most of what i've read from brazilian literature are classics and like books that are at least decades old lol (uni life go brr), so my recommendations will probably rotate around that. so lets go!

first of all, of course, i recommend Dom Casmurro by Machado de Assis (black author btw!), it wouldnt be a br lit rec if i didnt mention this one at some point. this is like the ultimate classic i'd say, but im not recommending just for that. i REALLY enjoy unreliable narrators and this book is all about it. its a novel about a guy who marries his childhood love, but suspects she's cheating on him, but yk, he's a white man from the 19th century, he thinks he's always right and is privileged af and it shows in the way he tells his story, so his opinions arent that trustworthy. and the author knew very much what he was doing, and he did it on purpose.

still about Machado, i must mention his short stories. i really really enjoy grotesque and gothic literature (think the vibes of poe, lovecraft, gogol, dostoevsky, etc) and Machado nails at it. he's also translated poe's works to portuguese back in the day, so we know for certain there's some influences in there. well, i recommend Machado in genereal, my guy really knew how to criticize society with some great witty and sarcastic comments if you know where to look.

if you want more grotesque but is tired of reading stuff written by men, i recommend Julia Lopes de Almeida (who isnt as known as she should be, she was done dirty and purposefully neglected by ABL - brazilian literary non-profit society) and Lygia Fagundes Telles. both of them have some reeeal creepy stories, just the way i like it.

now, if you're into authors who dissect the human mind and master the stream of consciousness and love to relate to the thoughts of the characters of your books, i highly recommend Clarice Linspector. no one does it like her, my girl knows how to transform thoughts into a narrative and its insane, her books are really endearing to read imo.

but if you want something that will thresh the brazilian society (or well, any third world country's society i'd say) and expose every flaw about the system, racism, misogyny, colonialism and class conflict, i recommend specifically the books Vidas Secas, by Graciliano Ramos (idk if theres a translation, but the title says Dry Lives), The Slum, by Aluísio Azevedo, and The Devil to Pay in the Backlands, by Guimarães Rosa (this one is sooo hard to read in portuguese bc it uses a lot of regionalisms from a region im not from, so hard that i actually got a copy in english to read for my finals lmao. but worry not, the english translation is much easier to understand. it also has some queer themes, both gender and sexuality wise, and its a literal masterpiece).

for poetry, i highly recommend Augusto dos Anjos, a personal favourite. im not that into poetry, but Carlos Drummond de Andrade and Cecilia Meireles are very good too.

there's so much more i could recommend, but these are the ones that come to my mind rn. idk if thats what you were thinking about, and sorry i coulnt bring anything contemporary, if thats more your vibes, but i really recommend all of these, for anyone, they're really enriching to read.

[unrrrreliable]

alcoholic dad

i found out that my dad is an alcoholic. he has been one for 20 years. my fathers story is very complex, but basically when he was in his mid 20s he got punched in the face in the middle of a train and his brain got “slightly” damaged (as in he didnt fucking die). his frontal lobe got kinda messed up, so he makes a lot of actions impulsively . and he’s reaaaallly bad at managing stuff like money and planning stuff like trips. for example, if you tell him to buy 1L of milk in the grocery store he’ll buy 3. because of that, my mom always makes the decisions, thay always have to pay the bills together and my mom needs to check if he isnt “wasting” any money as in giving it to the church (which doesnt need any money at all since we’re in fucking switzerland and the government funds the church). theres some stuff we dont know if he already had or if it was caused by that accident. nonetheless, my dad only told that to my mom when she was pregnant with me, the youngest of 2 children. of course, my mom couldnt just leave. she said, if he had said that before my brother and i were born, she would’ve left him. honsetly, i cant judge her, because he is disabled, kind of, so it would be really hard to build up a family with such a person (spoiler alert - it was). my dad is also really detatched from the world, like he lives in his own world. sometimes, when i was 1-3 and my brother 3-6, he would just leave the house with 0 warning and stay out for 7 hours without answering the phone. obviously, my mom would panic because she’d always think something bad happened to him but then, at the end of the day (literally), he would come back as if nothing had happened. he would do that constantly. until we moved out to brazil. this happened in 2007. i was 3, my brother 6. life there was really nice: my brother and i started kindergarten and prmary school, my mom was studying to make an exam which would allow her to work for some kind of fbi (receita federal). it was a really good job with a high salary, but she had to study hours a day. my dad was making a phd in something in germany but living in brazil. side note: he didnt put any effort to learn portuguese, search a job in brazil, anything. that was his passive-aggressive way to tell my mom that he didnt want to live in brazil and he wanted us to come back to switzerland. in 2010, after hours of hard work and study, my mom passed the exam and could work in rf. but then, my dad was  depressed and said he wanted us to come back to switzerland. my mom says he wasnt actually depressed. honestly, depressed or not, he shouldnt have used that as an excuse to take us out of there and my mom after she had put on so much time to study for that exam. basically he didnt give a fuck about her. i feel really bad writing this because my mom really studied a lot and she wouldve been an excelent professional. flash forward, we move back to switzerland, this time in the italian part. my mom says she wanted to come here because of the language and because in this city theres a mountain that looks like pão de açúcar (sugar bread or whatever its called - that one in rio). obviously its not because of that, i assume its because she just didnt want to live in the german part since she was very discriminated and that lead to her hating the language and just the energy. and of course he didnt do anything to defend her. so we move here and my mom gets depression. i dont remember much of her being depressed, but i vividly remember calling her to watch some “family movies” but she would never come because she was in her room, precisely in her bed, depressed. she would sometimes sleep until midday, but since i was like 7 i didnt really mind or be worried. neither did my brother. side note: my dad is a really weak person: he doesnt tell what he thinks in your face, he has to drink to have the courage to tell my mom something when he’s angry at her. i think thats one of the worst things a man can do to their women, especially my mom, since her dad was an alcoholic. she tells me when she was 4 she used to be extremely afraid and embarassed of her father, and she doesnt remember him being sober. when she was 13 he eventually died and she and her siblings had to take care of the bills. long story short, she absolutely despised men who drank, and thats exactly what my dad did. of course he knew it btw. everytime he drank my mother would hide it, and in send him immediately to their room or just not argue with him. but one time, in summer, my brother was at a summer camp and i was at home with my mom. my dad came home drunk and i dont remmeber much but they started arguing. he wasnt aggressive at all but he was just talking nonsense and lock himself in the bathroom and cried? i dont know. i just remember him making wierd noises. anyways, my mom sent me to my friends house and i was really happy lol. that day, my mom was fed tf up, so she decided that the 3 of us would move back to brazil and my dad would stay here and visit us once in a while. once or twice a month. this was in 2013. from 2013 until 2017, we lived our best life. my dad would send the money from switzerland to brazil and it would multiply by 4 more or less since the dollar was pretty high, so it converted to the brazilian currency. we would eat out at restaurants every week, my mom would buy clothes every week (not too much because she knows how to control herself and she never buys what she doesnt need), have pilates lessons, have coffees with her friends, we would have lunch and dinner with our relatives. we were at home. my mom was at home, at her hometown. my dad would come visit us once every month. everything was going pretty good. of course we had problems, especially my brother, who struggled a lot in school since in brazil you have much more stuff to study and school is genuinely harder. in 2016, brazil’s president dilma rousseff got impeached and my mom already knew the political situation was only starting to go downhill. also, she didnt want my brother and i to do highschool there, so we came back to switzerland in january 2017. in the beginning, it was pretty shit for me and my brother, my class was shit and my classmates were a bunch of idiots. but at least i had some friends. things were going ok. once in a while my dad would come home with a wierd facial expression, talking a lot of nonsense and making random speeches but i would think nothiung of it, he probably just had a tiring day. flash forward to 2019, my dad is like that again, this time my mom actually tells us he drank. we are a little worried, but he’s not acting up or whatever, problem is, he drank some hours before we went to the aparmtment we were going to rent (in which we’re living right now). of course, he drank on purpose because he knew it would piss my mom off and she would be embarassed, but he doesnt give a fuck. thats his way of telling her he’s angry at her for whatever reason. flash forward to some weeks ago, july 2020, my dad drinks again. now, we already know thast he *sometimes* drinks, so were like “ffs he drank again”. but this time its a little different: my mom actually argues with him. they start a discussion because my mom was pissed that he was constantly drinking and said that she would leave him if he could, so he went outside and drank. anyways, they were arguing and then my dad started crying and slammed the door. we went there to try to talk to him, but as soon as my mom opened the door he pushed her using actual strength. if she hadnt had both of her feet stable on the ground, she wouldve fallen and probably hurt herself. he then proceeded to push me but i yelled back at him. i could feel the anger in his voice and how he pushed us. he slammed the door again and threw himself onto the bed face down and started loudly crying, it was just awful. my brother and i went to the kitchen and my mom told us to go there and try tzo talk to him. my brother sat on the bed and i laid against the door. my brother was trying to talk to him and i was cringing really hard. 

[viralhottopics]

20 Things I Learned During My Weight Loss Journey Of Losing 96 Pounds

Did you ever see one of those before and after weight loss transformation pictures and think, That doesnt even look like the same person! or They purposely picked an unflattering before photo?

I have lost almost 100 pounds, and have kept it off for so long that there are people I know now who never knew me during the time in my life when I was heavy. One such friend saw an old picture up while visiting and said, I still cant believe it, you look so different, Id almost think you had cosmetic surgery. If she had a true understanding of my intense fear of needles (I passed out getting my ears pierced!) shed know that absolutely wasn’t the case.

Another time, a house cleaner didnt recognize me in my own wedding photo and, when I confirmed it was me she looked at her friend and said something in Portuguese that included the word gorda. After three years of high school Spanish, I know the word fat in Spanish when I hear it!

Which brings me to this point: You’ll be surprised how weight loss affects you. I mean, sure you think youll look better, and you will, but the way you feel, the manner in which you hold yourself and the amount of times youll flash a smile, all change too.

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Because of the dramatic changes my body has undergone since I lost weight, I get asked quite a lot how I did it, so here is my own condensed guide to getting into great shape. Let’s call it the Cliff Notes version of everything I’ve learned along my weight loss journey.

1. As a general rule, unless its cauliflower or a White Chocolate Luna bar, if its white, dont eat it.

2. Think of food as a choice, and not as a reward or a punishment. You dont deserve a decadent dessert, nor are you depriving yourself if you dont have it.

3. Dont get comfortable with some success. Theres no finish line or touchdown dance. As I was losing weight, and every time I went down a size, I would only buy one pair of jeans, one pair of tan pants, and one pair of black pants. I wouldnt spend a lot, and I would tell myself, Dont invest in this size, as youre not going to be staying here for long.

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4. BLTs count: Bites, Licks and Tastes add up and Sips too (so try your best not to drink your calories!)

5. Eat foods in their lowest common denominator: Think orange, not orange juice, and shop the outside aisles of the supermarket. Its where the least processed foods are.

6. Avoid any food that has a television commercial.

7. Do, dont watch.

8. Make rules for yourself. I have a rule that, unless its a family movie or sporting event that we are watching as a group, I DVR my favorite programs and hop on my exercise bike when I want to watch. Do you have a pedometer? Make a minimum step commitment for each day. I also have a rule of not taking the elevator unless its going up or down more than 20 flights.

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9. Never walk by a source of clean water. Drink up!

10. Make your workouts like brushing your teeth, just something you do without question.

11. You getto workout, you dont haveto workout. (This one is a biggie!)

12. Meals should be a balance of lean proteins, complex carbohydrates and healthy fats.

13. A stumble doesnt have to be a free fall. Having a row of Oreos doesnt have to be a full out surrender.

14. Nix the excuses. Youre no busier than a fit person. Theyre all busy too.

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15. And now, to quote Vezzini from my favorite film, The Princess Bride: You fell victim to one of the classic blunders. The first is, never get involved in a land war in Asia, but only slightly less well known is this

16. Never order a grilled chicken Caesar salad and think you ordered a fit and clean meal. Theres as much fat and calories in this standard restaurant salad staple as a cheeseburger and French fries. Still want the salad? Get it without the cheese and croutons, and skip the Caesar dressing for a lighter dressing on the side and drizzle, not drown, your greens. Plenty of times people go off track as they ate something they thought was a good choice.

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17. Never avoid lifting weights thinking that they will make you bulky. If it was that easy to bulk up, there would be a lot more men walking around looking like Arnold Schwarzenegger in his heyday. Speaking of lifting weights, nix the weenie weights too, unless thats really your starting point. If you can breeze through twelve repetitions of a move, its time to increase that weight! Heavy weights do great things for your body. Resistance training boosts your metabolism, burns more calories, even after youve stopped working out, and builds muscle, which burns even more calories at rest.

18. Its very tempting to let food be a stress reliever. Theres a reason why theres the term comfort food. My suggestion is just to try to be accountable for what you decide to do or not do. Ultimately, youre captain of your own ship, and you shouldnt put the wheel in other peoples hands. Caught up in some drama? Figure out if its really your problem. I find myself breaking out the Not my circus, not my monkeys, idiom a lot. Even when it is my circus and my monkeys, I tell myself that working out will give me the strength to handle it. If I decide Id rather trade my dinner for martinis and tortilla chips, I do my best to take responsibility for my choice.

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19. Never solely rely on your workout buddy or diet challenge friends when weight loss is on the line. While it can be fun to workout with a friend, or as part of a group, ultimately your weight loss and fitness goals are an individual achievement. If your friend needs to skip the gym one day, thats not a license for you to do the same.

20. Likewise, if youre out on the town and a challenge mate suggests splitting the fried Blooming Onion, youll need to be the one throwing a fork at them, I mean, politely declining. Did you ever hear that expression, Show me your friends and Ill show you your future? If youre trying to develop healthier eating habits and a solid fitness routine, you may be surprised by how those people closest to you respond. Ive said it a hundred times, saboteurs are everywhere with their very tempting catchphrases: Well start tomorrow. Just this once. Youre no fun anymore. Dont deprive yourself. Youre going to need to be the captain of your own fitness ship. As captain, you should also be aware that your crew is not always going to be supportive or encouraging. There may be for a million reasons why, and youll drive yourself crazy trying to figure it out.

Charlene Bazarian is a fitness and weight loss success story after losing 96 pounds. She mixes her no-nonsense style of fitness advice with humor on her blog atFbjfit.comand on Facebook atFBJ Fit.

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