#like wtf did those 50000 words entail I dontfucking remember at all

[variousqueerthings]

tagged by @secondclassfangirl

Rules: Post your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers!

Lol, four out of five of these aren't even Cobra Kai. Thank you though, this really gave me the chance to look at how much I've written (much more than I thought I had)....

For We In Our Youth Did These Things (Kingsman) M

Summary: Eight years after the disappearance of Merlin, Roxy Morton receives a mysterious clue that could lead to the destruction of everything that she once believed in.

This is possibly my least engaged-with fic in comparison to the effort and time I put into it, and I can't say I blame people. It's a lesbian rare-pair, I didn't finish it until long after Kingsman had lost its lustre because of the horrendous sequel, it's a a tinker tailor soldier spy AU, a sequel to a different (quite intense) WWII AU, and it's very bleak and novelly rather than fanficcy. There is nothing I've written that so much encapsulates the "I Write For Me" ethos of fanfiction. I haven't read it back in a couple of years, and I'm sure I could pull out things I'll want to edit on my next read-through, but holy damn! Good Stuff! I did that! My world-building and playing with a relatively twisty-turny plot and creation of the lesbian spy drama that we deserve was fucking incredible (if I do say so myself)!

2. the language of change (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine) G

Summary: When Kira - newly-appointed ambassador for Bajoran/Cardassian relations - arrives on Cardassia to see her old friend Garak, she's immediately pulled into another one of his schemes. Not everyone is as convinced of the plan as he is, so now Kira has to try not to yell, punch someone, or accidentally engage too hard in argumentative flirting.

This began a longer endeavour (that I'm not finished with) across a whole series to create a post-DS9 climate that I wish could exist in Alpha Canon, where the end of the Dominion War, the destruction of Cardassia, and Bajoran politics affect the wider story (as they damn well should). I also wanted to create a story about various different DS9 characters and their continued relationships to each other, and finally let Kira be a lesbian! So much of my DS9 HC was born out of creating this fic.

To be honest I could put several fics from this series alone on here, because I love it very, very dearly, but I think this one. It makes me feel so so happy.

3. between the devil and the deep blue sea (Peaky Blinders) E

Summary: Tommy hallucinates that Alfie is Death and almost kills him. Alfie responds by trying to choke him to death. Tommy moans and well, who is Alfie to kill something that moans so prettily, while his hands are around its neck.

This was uh... lockdown gave me so much time and I live with kinky people who enable the fuck out of me. This is my first really graphic fic and it is really fucking graphic. I did not know I had it in me. What I really love about it, was that it felt like I was really beginning to understand what kind of a writer I am with this. The ways everything is to the benefit of character study, including sex, and the way I like to create large, intricate things that reference back to themselves and include a lot of re-read gratification (I think so at least)! It gave me so much freedom to push myself and - if you're into some serious dubcon - I think it's uh... pretty hot... to pat myself on the back.

4. Smalltown Boys (The Outsiders) M

Summary: Johnny and Dally survived, but it turns out living is very different to surviving.

This one is still in-progress, but the chapters work as their own little narratives. I have wanted to write this for awhile, and it's very rewarding. I get to think about queerness in a historical context and pay little pieces of respect to queer writers of the past in various little ways (either through plot structure, modelling characters off of them, or referencing their works in the text). And of course, I get to let these two flipping live! It's also started me on a journey of reimagining texts as queer in ways that for the most part just... nudge them to the left a little, because as anyone who hangs around me for more than 5 seconds knows, I'm obsessed with the ways creators use queercoding tools without knowing it. I just think it's a very beautiful little slice of life, with the realities of queerness affecting how they move through the world.

5. Breathe With Me M

Summary: Daniel discovers that all it takes for Johnny to do as he's told is the right touch

I wanted to include something from Cobra Kai, because obviously that's my main sandbox right now, and I think it's this one, simply because it establishes how far I've gotten in my thinking about Daniel, Johnny, and Amanda so far. It's also what I wrote while I was really getting into the fandom itself, while before that I was still getting to know people. I think cementing an aro-Amanda in my head was such a breakthrough to my view of her, before that I couldn't quite pin her down, but now I get to develop her in lots of different directions (and will do so!) -- as for this Daniel and Johnny... well, everything after this is painted a little bit by this dynamic.

I think? I've seen most everyone get tagged by this? @obstinatecondolementent if you haven't been tagged, @mimsyaf if you're around and feel like it, no pressure ofc!