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the-eldritch-it-gay · 2 years

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Splash of Color Saturday Prompt: Tell us about important figures in the history of specific regions, and cultures, in Thedas! Past kings, queens, leaders of empires, and leaders of tribes. Perhaps there are infamous rebels, gentle healers, renowned teachers? Or someone else who has extraordinary importance to your narrative from the past? Let us remember them, here!

Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin and Aclinde

[An excerpt from a letter written by Ghi’la’nas’len of Clan Eir’melamem. Originally written in an Orlesian-Elven pidgin, it has been translated by Warden N’Abjidynen of Clan Eir’melamem]

I hear life in the cities has taken a turn, with all that’s going on with the royalty and nobles. I fear it’s not uncommon.

My dear cousin[1], have I ever told you about my clan’s history? We have a long history, of course, but your stories of your hardships working in noble estates have reminded me of one particular story. My clan has always roamed Orlais, we’ve witnessed and learned much of both historic events and mundane happenings. Some we even played a part in.

Do you know of the unrest among servants during the late Storm Age and early Blessed age? I’m sure you can assume the basis of it, I fear such unrest is ever-present in Orlais, regardless of the age. The unique part of this unrest had to do with the Keeper of my clan, at the time, Keeper Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin, and an elf named Aclinde.

Generally, our clan and most I know try to keep their distance from human cities. But one time during the late Storm age, a snow storm and damage to the aravels caused Keeper Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin to settle the clan temporarily on the outskirts of Val Firmin.

Meanwhile, in the city, the servants of the noble houses were beginning to band together. It is a familiar scene, one that had taken place before and has taken place since, as you well know. And I’m sure you are also well aware of how the nobility deals with such issues. Plenty of servants are fired at best, and at worst…

Perhaps the Creators were watching over our people that day, as one of the servants who had been fired, an elven woman by the name of Aclinde, had gathered with the others who were still free, and together they raided the jail, freeing are their fellow elves. The group thereafter split up, some going home to their families, some quickly packed up and fled towards nearby cities hoping to create a new life. Aclinde gathered a group of her own and led them south of the city, perhaps hoping to find refuge in the wild.

Her group, a few dozen elves, some children, some elders, made their way to the outskirts of the Val Firmin. It was winter, and a great blizzard soon fell upon them as they walked, freezing and with no home to return to. It was there that her group came across where Clan Eir’melamem had settled. The hunters noticed them first, and Keeper Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin was quick to welcome the group, urging them to sit by the fires, to eat, to rest. And as they did, Aclinde met with Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin, to tell them of what happened to their group and to ask for a short refuge until the storm passed.

Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin agreed, and took it upon themselves to ensure Aclinde’s group was cared for and protected. Even as city guards came looking for Aclinde and her group. When the guards asked Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin if they had seen Aclinde or her people, Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin would simply shake their head and tell them there were no strangers among their clan, they had not met or seen any servants.

Once the storm stopped, neither Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin nor Aclinde felt rushed to go off on their own ways. By the time the aravels were fixed and the snow began to melt, both groups had grown accustomed to each other. As the clan readied to move again, Aclinde met once more with Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin to speak of the future.

Aclinde felt as though she and her people had overstayed their welcome and wished to not intrude further on the clan’s hospitality. Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin, though, proposed that she and her people stay instead.

“You and I are knit from the same cloth, your people and my people are knit from the same cloth. You are free to go your own way, but do not let it be due to worries of whether you are welcome. Never were you strangers here, your arrival was not an intrusion, but rather a homecoming.”

Thus, my cousin[1], is how my clan came to be as it is today. There are many more tales I could tell you of Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin and Aclinde, if the Creators allow, perhaps you will one day hear our harhen tell you the story properly.

You might think I know not of the struggles you face in the city, and perhaps I do not first-hand. But as Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin said, our souls are of the same cloth, we are not so different. Elders in our clan are descended from Aclinde and her group, my own mother spent much of her life as a maid, my spouse was no stranger to such work, most of our clan have cousins or aunts[2] in the city. Our worlds are the same. The stories of what you face now are interwoven with my clan’s history, are told as one of our own.

Remember, we have more in common than you have with the nobility. There is always a spot in the aravels for you[3], my cousin. It is together that we can be Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin[4].

Translator’s notes:

[1] In this case, the term cousin is being used akin to an endearment or show of familiarity, rather than actual blood relation.

[2] The actual term used is a general term akin to aunt or uncle.

[3] Meaning, “You are always welcome among the clan”

[4] Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin translates to “One who searches for a gentle tomorrow”. In this case, the name is being used both to mean to live in Gwillen’il’cam’ienvunin’s footsteps, and also to do as their name means and search for a gentler tomorrow.

#splash of color saturday #DA Abjid #OC: Ghi'la'nas'len #live hasn't been kind to me recently but i wanted to do smth #clan eir'melamem is the dalish clan I have Abjid (an Orlesian Warden in DAOA) come from

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chuuyasheaven · 3 months

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RAAAAAAAAH idk if this counts as an ask but this specific scenario has been marinating in my mind for WEEKS and i think you might enjoy it :3c

to put it shortly ive been thinking of hot-headed reader who has trouble containing their temper (im not projecting whar do you mean) x chuuya (established relationship) that goes from angst to smut…. teehee

basically chuuya and reader begin arguing bc i hc that EVEN THOUGH CHUUYA IS EXTREMELY LOYAL AND DOTING TO THE ONES HE CARES ABOUT…. his temper often gets the best of him. Recently, chuuya had been very busy, and reader knew that, and continuously made an effort to help him in whatever ways they could, be it making dinner/lunch for him, offering to help with paperwork, etc. BUT thing is.. chuuya isn't really noticing this and treats them like a nuisance. He hasn't said anything outright insulting or upsetting, but he treats reader so differently, like he's silently blaming reader for his own temper and mood. He doesn't even call them by their nickname/petname anymore, everything feels so distant now.

So in an attempt to yk, NOT give up on their relationship, reader decides to confront chuuya about this in a calm manner, but he blindly lashes out and reader is NOT having ANY of it… cue a petty back and forth between him and reader, and reader gets out of the house to cool off and meanwhile chuuya finally comes to his senses. He tries to reason with reader when they come back, but they end up doing exactly what chuuya did to them, dismissing him and not accepting any form of half-assed apology. and so,,,,,, chuuya tries to make it up to reader,,,, if ikwym :3c

cue chuuya eating out reader like his life depends on it /jjj ((THIS IS SO LONG LMAO IM LITERALLY SOSORRY))

"You're not getting tired of me, are you?" // C. Nakahara

Summary. Recently, Chuuya has been kinda distant lately, mostly due to his work. This also resulted into you mostly overthinking— what if he isn't at the office all the time just like says? With this thought at the back of your mind, you tried to make an effort to be nice and caring as possible, only for Chuuya to decline the food you make him, denying any help you offer and barely spending time, which made the thoughts even more scary. When you can't take it anymore, you snap, at first he didn't get what your problem was until he thought about your earlier attempts. Now driven with guilt, Chuuya wants to assure you're the most important thing to him and makes up for his actions in the process.

Tags. Chuuya N. / afab! Reader, the summary pretty much already tells the story, angst to smut to fluff maybe, miscommunication, Reader prolly has anxiety, swearing, ooc! Chuuya, suspicions of cheating, Chuuya didn't notice at first but it's okay he'll make it up by licking pussy ^_^, might be cringe, short too idk, Reader might be KINDAAA based off me, petnames (baby, doll, darlin', sweetheart), oral sex (afab! receiving), praising, overstimulation? , p in v, who knows maybe i fucked up the ask and wrote smth else, for the first time ever porn WITH plot, might have a rushed end, might contain grammar errors, etc.

"Hey, Chuuya, wanna eat? I made your favorite!", you said with a nervous tone painted in your voice, which Chuuya didn't really notice. "No, baby, I can't. Sorry, maybe next time?", he answered without even exchanging looks with you, just doing his paperwork as if it was more important to him. It's been like this for several days already and you did nothing but trying to help Chuuya to make things easier, but he didn't budge. You slowly started to get annoyed and just walked away to eat by yourself, silently.

With all kind of negative thoughts which caused you to overthink. These "thoughts" didn't leave you alone since he's become more distant. What if he's losing interest? What if he's not always late in the office? Am I annoying him and a burden? After you finished eating, you just put his plate into the fridge and sat alone in your living room. Some while later, Chuuya came to see you for a few minutes before returning to work. He tired hugging you but you rejected it. Confused, he looks at you before asking. "What's wrong, doll?", did he seriously just ask you that? After pushing away for the— what? The millionth time for his work? At this innocent question you snapped, well, not really but you were beyond pissed.

When Chuuya told you that he was probably busy for the next days, you understood, at first. Knowing Chuuya, he could make some time for you in between, right? He was your really loyal, sweet and loving boyfriend, caring was he too, of course Chuuya should be able to make atleast a little time. And to his credit, he did, at first. He took breaks in which he spent time with you, cooking your food with you, and also other activities you guys normally do. But with time, Chuuya got more and more work and spent less and less time with you. You also understood at first, and trying to be a good girlfriend, you tried to take some work off his back by doing some paperwork with him, only to deny you. Don't get Chuuya wrong, he appreciated it, but he'd rather do it himself. You understood, leaving him be, but then he started to work late, staying behind in the office. That's when you started to overthink a little. You really didn't want to let you thoughts get to you, Chuuya is loyal and so loving he would never, right? Why was he even staying so late in the first place? Was it because you constantly asked him to help to the point he wanted to work in the office at work? These thoughts would slowly consume you later on, and instead of speaking with Chuuya about it, you kept it to yourself, you didn't want to annoy him anyways. It's been 3 days later and he didn't even say a single word to you, just work, work, work. Were you even Chuuya's top priority at this point? You just let him distance himself, in hope of him noticing your presence. All this did was make the situation worse, to the point where you cried yourself to sleep at night feeling unwanted. Did Chuuya finally notice? No, his head is still drowned in paperwork. "Chuuya, do you have time right now?" — "No. Go do something else, doll, I still have work left." His tone had some harshness to it, a hint of annoyance too. But maybe it was because of the stress because of work. "I could help him maybe.", you told yourself, you don't want him to overwork himself, has he even eaten today? "Well, maybe I could help with the paper—" — "You can't, so please go. I still have a lot left." — "But I could—" — "Just go, I'm busy. I can't really talk with you 'cause you're gonna distract me." What a reason, but you can't let him push you away now, can you? "Chuuya, please, I just wanna help you—" — "Just leave me the hell alone and do something else. Look, I love you for trying, I don't need your help the only this you're doing right now is distracting me." "If you say so." Was all you said before leaving his home office without saying another word.

That was the last time you talked to him during these days, but today, was the day you finally snapped at him for pushing you away all these days. And for what did he push you away? For trying to be nice and take some shit off his back? "What's wrong?! What's wrong is that you pushed me away for— what? A week and a half?!", you explained with anger behind your voice, which Chuuya wasn't familiar with. "Doll, I didn't push you away—", before he could speak you went on. "Stop with the bullshit. Whenever I tried helping with anything you always denied me! I can't do this anymore.", you said with a crack in your voice, now Chuuya slowly got pissed too, was it his fault for having an asshole of a boss?

"Do you think I want to do this? Who in the hell would participate in such work as a fucking joke?!", he said rather louder than you. "Your damn work seems to be more important that me, when was the last time you looked me in my face?", you stood up from the couch. "You wouldn't even know what to do!", "I could've if you took some fucking time to explain!", you shouted back, this is where Chuuya might have lost his temper. "Why the hell should I? You won't even understand when I tell you to leave! I'm sorry if the world doesn't fucking revolve around you, some people have other priorities?!", his voice got angrier and louder.

"Appearently I'm not your first priority, which is what I'm supposed to be?! I just wanted to spend time with you, but if I'm so fucking 'distracting' then I'll leave!", "Oh, so now you can take a damn hint?", he called after you tried to walk away. "What?", you stopped and turned around to face him. "Fuck you, then. I'm done, go do your work which is more important to me! All I was doing was to try—", "I don't give a fuck if you were "trying" shit! Just fucking don't because it won't matter anyway all you're being is annoying and desperate.", Chuuya shouted at you.

"So I'm annoying you now?", you said, your voice going quieter. "Yeah, with the way you were constantly up in my shit. You're not the most important thing right now, just stop trying to stress me more than you already are.", when he said that, you were facing the floor, fighting back the angry tears that were building up. "Alright, go do your work. I'll leave you to it.", you muttered, walking towards your door to take a walk. Chuuya just tsk'ed and went back to his room. It was quiet in the apartment, Chuuya was working on some papers left when he thought about your earlier argument. Wondering why you started it, he thought about what you said and slowly realized that what you said was true. He has gotten more distant, he was a little rude to you about leaving him alone and barely paid you and your attempts to help attention.

Knowing he probably fucked up in those past days, hurting your feelings and calling you 'annoying and desperate' probably caused the biggest guilt he ever experienced. Chuuya tried calling you but you hung up instantly. Okay, reasonable. The second time he called you took you're time to pick up. "Hey, baby—", "What do you want?", you asked coldly. "I thought you wanted to be left alone.", Chuuya could hear the pain in your voice. "Look, darling, you know I didn't mean what I said. It was the stress—", you really didn't wanna hear him right now, especially his excuses. "Sorry, Chuuya but I don't really wanna talk right now, since I'm annoying you anyways, talk to you later.", before getting another word out, you hung up. Chuuya just took deep sigh and thought of ways to apologize and make it up to you.

You first left at 6pm but returned at 8pm, you were a little tired after walking a lot so you looked forward to lay in your shared bed, alone again probably. You changed into Chuuya's shirt just like you have been these last several days for some missing closure, not forgetting your shorts before you sat on the bed to be on your phone. Not even five minutes later, the door creaked open, revealing Chuuya with a guilt driven face. "What?, you asked him once again. "Can we talk, please?", you just stared at him before nodding. He sat down on the bed, patting the space next to him, you moved to the edge of the bed to sit down next to him.

"I'm sorry,", Chuuya started. "I'm sorry for neglecting you these past days, didn't mean to make you feel like a burden.", "So you finally got the hint?", you ask sarcastically. "Baby, I mean it. I shouldn't have priotized my work over you and pushed you away during it. I never wanted to feel unimportant.", he held your hand now, gently caressing it. "The stress made me act this way probably and i shouldn't have lashed out at you. You forgive me?", your gaze was still as cold. Chuuya just pulled you close to him, finally after a week, this made you realize that you missed him more than you thought.

Chuuya stroked your back, kissing your forehead first, then your cheeks, and lastly, your lips— those lips he hasn't kissed for something which felt like an eternity. He just wanted to make it up to you one way or another. "Lay down, dollface, wanna make you feel good.", Chuuya said to you while he was holding your chin. "I haven't fully forgiven you yet, y'know that, right?", looking away while you said this, Chuuya just had to chuckle. "You're gonna when I'm done with you, trust me.", you rolled your eyes and just laid back like he wanted. Chuuya moved himself between your legs, removing the shorts and panties blocking his path and letting your legs hang over his shoulders.

"No need to tense up, pretty, jus' relax,", he whispered, pressing kisses to your thighs, never breaking eye contact. Those kisses started to get closer and closer to your cunt, which was waiting for his tongue. Once his mouth got to it's destination, Chuuya started his work. He ate you out like his life depended on it, but he made sure he won't make a big mess. You where quietly moaning, trying to not be heard by him. "Why so quiet, sweetheart?", he lightly teased, you just looked away again. "C'mon, look at me. I wanna make you feel good, remember that?", you looked back at him, your cheeks were slightly flushed and lust was filled in your eyes. Chuuya dived back in and kept his eye contact with you, looking at you while you try to bite down your moans. This only made him suck on your clit, which also broke your silence.

It didn't take long for you to finish with Chuuya looking at you while pleasuring you. As you came on his tongue, still breathing unsteady, Chuuya got up between your legs. "You're so perfect like this, darlin'.", he whispered before kissing you, you could loosely taste yourself on his tongue. While he was kissing you, he freed his cock out of his pants. Chuuya stopped kissing you for a second to insert his dick inside you. He stroked your folds with his tip to catch some slick and entered almost easily, as if your cunt was sucking him in. "Fuck, I forgot how good you felt around me. Forgive me for neglecting this perfect— oh, fuck!", he cut himself off by starting to thrust.

If you weren't loud earlier, you definitely were now. Chuuya was kissing you while being inside you, thrusting while his lips were on yours, whispering "I love you"s and apologies to you. "You're so good for me, fuck— I love you so much.", his thrusts got sloppier, meaning he was close. Your arms were thrown around his neck as you threw your head back, you could feel your upcoming orgasm. "Chuuya— shit, 'm so close, please don't stop!", "Wasn't planning on it, you feel way too good for that, baby.", as your cunt clenched down around him, he surprisingly moaned, instantly cumming inside you. He thrusted once more and that's when you came undone a second time.

"So. . did you change your mind, doll?"

@moth-of-mythos // @pretendtobesick04 // @alastors-deerest // @shi-nakano // @samutoru // @munnaitorei // @sjsnsidream // @shuwyyx // @skelitea // @xaviawinter // @cvidy // @cherrytreegrove // @skk-lover // @pe4rl-diver // @walking-simp

Sorry if ur tag didn't work 😕 also sorry if I fucked the storyline up

#chuuya'sheaven ♡#chuuya nakahara #chuuya nakahara smut #chuuya smut #chuuya x reader #bsd chuuya #bungou stray dogs chuuya #bungo stray dogs smut #bsd smut #chuuya angst

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misc-obeyme · 2 months

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LISTEN. (cw torture, barb thirst, mc infofump, mentions of murder and devildm politics, a bunch'a spoilers for Barbatos live ★ & Tea time w you-, obey me whump, conditioning, rant about newer fandom this ask is a wild ride)

But I also like the idea of him discovering what you’ve been doing & then questioning you about your methods. Like he’s impressed you would take matters into your own hands, but he is also an expert and can teach you many things~

Cue you getting taken on as the torturer’s apprentice. When you tell Solomon, he just goes pale and stammers out a joke about how he doesn’t like sharing his apprentice lol.

I'm gonna interrupt you like the potato i am but like???yes????? you do not understand my obsession with torture. I always thought I'm a masochist but I've recently figured i was wrong and Boy it Was the best feeling in rhe world to figure out whats wrong with me-

also my mc is both Sol's apprentice in magic and Barb's student in torture and baking. mhmhmmm. I also Do Not Like the brothers so much my mc was never an exchabge student. I did some black butler shit back there and now he lives in the castle. like two years before the exchange program- (no my canon doesnt follow the game's canon caue thats so very badly written) and he also helps w murdering people who are against Diavolo. and people just ?? can't believe it- there has to be some sort of a war shit going on. Dia is too kind to do this- also, if anyone figures they don't. Barb has POWERS-

and BOY DO I LOVE BARB FOR THAT. Also dia but he isnt important rn sjsksk. in the new event's card he said smth like he would cross his own boundries for the sake of Diavolo and Devildom. althought he didnt say for mc so 😔 but thats hot af still. But buT BUT vvv

villain wannabe. wdym darkness?? you said itll be for the sake of devildom! idk im misinterpenting or no but this is so side ways I'm a bit ????ing rn

also in Tea time with you when you ask him what the fuck he did that even being a 24/7 slave butler to Diavoli won'y undo the mistake he had done?? he laughs?? HEEHEEE???? what are you Michael Jackson? and the other option he goes straight to anger so idk whats with the huge difference in replies-

anyway angry Barb is also best Barb i dont make the rules. also he's the butler of their PRINCE noone gets to harm mc. they'd dissapear. go missing. possibly either killed or very altered. Came Back Wrong™ ohoho, imagine if some of the castle workers/maids etc used to be high ranked nobles and demons and they've done smth so wrong that lowered them to this. and they don't remember it?? and noone else does remember too. just some lost names. okay not to get far-

BUT LISTEN Barb has definitly done some conditioning bs out there you can not prove it otherwise. also, Mammon keeps getting punished by Lu and hasn't changed so imagine the pain those demons have to go through for that-

JSKSKAJ!! BARB IS HOT OKAY- HES SADISTIC. I live sadistic demon butlers . also the fact that he has a torture dungeon- and who says there aren't demons in the hidden prisons waiting for their turn? i imagine Barb would randomly take one, do the things™ and leave for the next few months. the second the demons think they're forgotten/ theyre doomed. its also not in order so yep more stress. so wha i was goimg to say is imagine a very sadistic and mentally ill™ mc whos very angry tortuing some " innocent" souls in the dungeons. also, I tend to imagine Barb has taught Lucifer a few forms of torture when he fell (cough, Believer cough-) so-

Barb is such an interesting character (like Sol) and the older fandom used to really put those aspects in mind but the newer fandom is stripped completely from darkfic. like. can we have more darkfic i am begging I want obey me whump I dont want mc angst i want mc whump i want these bad boys dying of pain and being saved the last minute i want more stories on devildom politics i want more dark! demons/dark! mc aus- like can we bring that back??? can we stop w 24/7 fluff/comfort/angst thats just mc's death ?? no hate to those but can we bring back the dark shit i want to see demons getting their asses whooped in barb's dungeon or Dia being manupilative af--😭😭😭

ok ok ill shut up now😂

There is so much happening in this ask, but for some reason I keep coming back to "HEEHEEE???? what are you Michael Jackson?" because wow that made me actually LOL for real.

I'm always going to be for canon divergence. I say do whatever makes you happy! Your MC must truly have their hands full learning all that stuff with Barbatos and Solomon. But like if you're gonna learn those things, might as well learn from the best, right???

The thing I like about Barbatos is that he is very versatile. They've kept him very mellow in the game, but he has so much potential to go dark if you want to write him that way. I mean they don't even confirm that he actually has a torture dungeon in the game... I'm pretty sure it's just Mammon who says he's rumored to have one. But like by leaving it open ended like that, we can speculate all we like about it, you know?

And traditionally, wasn't that the point of demons? Aside from tempting humans, they're supposed to torture souls, right? I mean, I don't know how accurate that actually is, but it's interesting to think about.

I'm not especially obsessed with torture and I think it's pretty clear from my writing that I'm generally on the fluffier side of things lol. But it's interesting to think about, especially considering the types of characters we're dealing with here. And I really like the exploration of morality and inner evil and that sort of thing when it comes to heavy stuff like torture.

I thought it was very interesting in Barbatos Live how he calls MC his good conscience. 'Cause in Tea Time with You, he very much indicates that he used to do crazy stuff all the time, but then the Incident happened and now he doesn't. So wouldn't his guilt over whatever happened be his good conscience, like it has been all this time before MC showed up? Is he saying that MC just makes him want to stick to that even more?

Though he also says that it's like demon nature to have some darkness, so I don't know if he's talking about his specific experience necessarily. It's more like he's saying he wants to fight against his own nature? I dunno.

OH DANG but I love that idea about the maids and such in the castle! Demons that messed up so bad, now Barb keeps them at the castle to work??? What was that about not giving into the darkness???? lk;asdfkjlfd

I'm afraid I can't really comment on the amount of darkfic present in the fandom at any given time... due to being a Fluffster Extraordinaire, I'm faaaar more likely to read sweet lovey romance fics than Barb torture dungeon fics. Which isn't to say that I don't like the Barb torture dungeon situation because I do indeed find it very intriguing lol. I'm just usually like yo I want that guy to bake for me and make me tea, I don't care what he does in his spare time.

In fact, I really like the idea of a sweet and doting house husband Barbatos that pampers MC all day every day while being a ruthless and loyal demon butler the rest of the time. Like the dungeon isn't a rumor but as long as he washes off the blood when he comes back, MC is like whatever lol.

Oh but I also like the idea of MC being just as bad as him, now that I think about it. Like MC isn't ignorant, they don't turn a blind eye, they are right there with him, actively participating. The torture couple aadsflkjdfkjldf

I dunno, I think I'm considering it in more of a humorous way than a serious way, though.

Anyway, it's fun to consider all aspects of Barbatos because he has so many facets! And I think it's fun to explore the different sides of him.

#I've just been feeling like I prefer MC to be a badass lately #so I think it'd be cool if they were just unbothered by it all #um okay I do feel like I need to cw this so #cw torture #tw torture #obey me #obey me barbatos #expressionless-fr #cc mutuals #misc answers

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plague-of-insomnia · 1 year

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hm idk how ur gonna feel abt an ask like this but i do want to get smth off my chest & u seem p safe. feel free to delete if u want

i saw a post recently talking abt how "gay" got used as a slur a lot more than people acknowledge. and it got me thinking of my school years & how often it got thrown around.

thing is. and heres where my train of thought goes off the rails. i actually experienced the word "incest" as an attack more than the word "gay"... which. ill explain. but it really got me thinking on this whole purity culture & demonising of incest depicted in literature & yknow taking things too far with whats considered incest.

bc at the end of the day. the reason incest is illegal (mostly) is to prevent inbreeding & the health issues that come along with that. if ur not blood related then theres no problem.

and like. the reason i got called incestuous and generally ostracised was bc i was close with a boy in my year. like we dated for a week as 14 yros do. and at some point i discovered that hey. his last name is the same as my aunts and lo and behold hes my 2nd cousin thru marriage or smth. so. not incest at all.

anyway that p much ruined our friendship (& it was a friendship. i broke things off before i even knew we were related bc i just didnt feel the same way and we stayed friends for a little bit) all bc some kids couldnt let it go that we had the vaguest relation to each other. he got bullied for the rest of our school year & ive felt horribly guilty for leaving him bc i wanted to be "cool" & ended up without any close friends like we were.

sorry if thats a weird thing to put in ur inbox.

Hey, anon. I don't mind this ask. I hope you don't mind me replying publicly. (In future if you don't just say so.)

This post will be a bit long, so I'll go ahead and put it under a readmore.

TW for discussions of "gay" used in a negative way, and discussions of the use of the word "incest," and its association with child sexual abuse, though there's really nothing terribly bad here as I'm not going into detail on any of thse topics. (If you need something tagged, though, let me know.)

Now, I'm old as dirt by tumblr standards, and I remember VIVIDLY the word "gay" being used in a negative light. As a kid, I didn't really see it used as a "slur" per se, but it was used to mean something was bad.

Like, if you saw a movie that sucked, you'd say "Man, that movie was so gay." It meant something like "lame."

So obviously, it wasn't a good thing, and when I got a bit older and was explained why using the word was bad, I stopped, and fortunately most other kids did too and it mostly faded from use (in that sense) at least as far as I noticed.

(I'm not saying gay hasn't been used as a more nasty slur/word ofc, this is just my personal experience with it.)

Granted, keep in mind when I was in high school, our LGBTQ+ club was just the "Gay/Straight Alliance." Back then, it was basically, you were gay/lesbian, or you were an ally. We never talked about trans people or nonbinary people or ace/aro people. Ofc every one of those identities/kinds of people existed, but as far as my world went, they didn't. Most of my circle of friends was queer in some way, but many were closeted or semi-closeted for various reasons.

Anyway, sorry for that detour. Now, as to your incest situation. I'm sorry that happened to you. It definitely wasn't fair. You didn't have any way to know if you were related, and if/when you did it was "easy" to end the relationship. But kids are kids, and they always love to find a way to single people out, and they probably didn't really care what the actual truth was.

Even if you'd discovered having a similar name was total coincidence, I'm sure they'd still have bullied you for "incest."

I wasn't bullied for it, thankfully, but I did have a classmate in high school with the same last name as mine. My name is very common in some places, but where I lived at that time it was not, so everyone assumed we were fraternal twins. He was a nice enough guy, but I really didn't want people to think we were siblings. But no matter how many times we both explained we weren't related, no one believed us.

Sometimes, once someone makes their mind up about something, there's no changing it.

As for "abandoning" your friend because you didn't want to be left out and regretting it, I get that too. There was a guy I dated when I was around 16, and we were very passionate, but I think honestly I entered a major depressive episode and lost all interest in everything, including him, and... anyway, I regret how things ended between us even today, many, many years later. I wish I could shake my 16-year-old self and tell them not to be so cruel, but we can't change the past, only learn from it and move forward.

With regards to antis/purity culture taking incest so far, I do agree it has gotten ridiculous. As you said, the reason incest is taboo is because of inbreeding, because if your (general you) DNA is too closely related, you increase the chance of having major/significant diseases due to a lack of genetic diversity. But antis tend not to understand the WHY's behind things (since they also believe pedophilia is bad bc it's disgusting, and not because it hurts children, who become real grown adults).

But I have seen some really wild takes called incest. Like a ship from one fandom where the male and female characters are friends. A lot of people consider it "problematic" apparently, because they have a "sibling-like" relationship. They did not grow up together, they aren't related, and yet that's "incest" according to antis.

I do want to mention another reason that incest can/is considered so bad, and it's because, despite what antis may think, most sexual abuse of children comes from someone close to them in their lives, often a family member or close friend. So for a lot of people, when they think of "incest," they closely associate it with sexual abuse of a child. It's possible that's why antis get so upset about it. I don't know. But that is another aspect to it. (Ofc for you, in your past situation, you were both around the same age, so that's not the case, but that association is there.)

But, in the end, in fiction, it doesn't matter, because there are not actual children who can be conceived or harmed, and so the whole purpose behind why incest isn't allowed in many places in modern times doesn't exist.

I hope you're doing OK now, anon. Don't be to hard on yourself. A lot of people have done things when they were young teens they regret and wish they could "undo," but as long as you learned from that experience so you could become a better person than that 14-year-old version of you, I think you're doing OK.

Sending you some hugs. <3

#poi answers #not kuro #anon

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