#luke also gets jealous in his own way as you saw in the last chapter lol but he's so much better at hiding it

[collegeboysam]

i'm OBSESSED with ur lucemond fic i loveeee it! please please PLEASE tell me cregan and dalton will be in the list of prospects that will be courting luke. ur jealous aemond is my favorite and can imagine it so well :)

AHHH 🥰🥰 Thank you so so much for reading my fic and for the lovely ask, I'm happy you're enjoying the story <3 getting Aemond right feels like the best compliment ever AND a relief at the same time.

Jealous Aemond is sooooo fun to write, since he's obviosly half in denial about his attraction for Luke, thinks he's better than everyone else, terrible at sharing in general and too competitive to see the betrothing season as anything but a challenge he must out-smart to get what he's "owed". Perfect mix to have the guy chewing glass at the idea of Lucerys marrying some fucker.

I actually got asked the same thing on ao3, particullarly about Dalton, so I'll give you a bit of a spoiler (I guess you could call it that.)

Dalton appears and he 100% has plans to be added to the poll of suitors. His situation is particular, since they practice polygamy in the Iron Islands and marrying Lucerys would not affect his line of succession, he has saltwives for that. And there's something in particular he gains out of tying himself to Lucerys, much to Aemond's annoyance, since he has dealt with Dalton's ass before as Master of Law (since, you know...Dalton, raids, kidnapping women...the two of them have had issues before) and he knows Dalton is different from other highborns, he doesn't play by the rules, harder to deal with (impossible to get rid of, etc.)

Luke sure has a talent to be a magnet for blood-thirsty psychos. Good for him, since he's obviosly lowkey into it.

Cregan appears in the story but he cannot be one of Lucery's suitors. He's the head of House Stark at this point in time, he needs to produce heirs and so on. In this AU him and Jace have the same arrangement they initially strike in the book, where one of Cregan's eventual kids will marry one of Jace and Baela's. Lucerys has been to the North before a couple of times since Cregan and Jacaerys are such good friends, etc. So, does Cregan appear in later chapters anyway? YES lmao. Mostly to piss Aemond off, even if he has no intention to pursuit Luke, since his pressence annoys Aemond regardless (as most men who appear will annoy him). He knows well Cregan cannot marry Lucerys, but it irks him deeply that Luke behaves almost like a puppy with Cregan (old habits die hard, he always wanted to tag along with Jacaerys when he went to Winterfell when they were younger, bit of a hero complex there.)

Now if I might give you a hint, since Cregan cannot be...perhaps Martell? Dorne is quite accepting of same sex relationships after all 😏😈

[wastelandcth]

we’re going home - cth

we’re going home (calum hood x fem!oc) || masterlist || series masterlist

summary: how calum discovered home isn’t necessarily a particular place but rather can be a point in time, a memory, or a person.

warnings: calum is having a bad day. 

author’s notes: hope you guys enjoy this chapter! once again - based off of vance joy’s album nation of two!

previous chapter || next chapter

Calum hadn't been home in years. Sure he'd visited a couple of times during the holidays or whenever they were on tour or doing promo. But he hadn't been able to enjoy being home in years, not since he left with the band to London those many years ago. He missed not having to go to bed in a small bunk that made his back hurt in the morning when he woke up in a city he hadn't fallen asleep in. He missed being able to take Duke on a walk, hell, he even missed waking up to him barking at the birds in the backyard. 

Lying awake in the bunk for what seemed like the third day in a row, Calum listened to the soft breathing coming from Clementine next to him. She'd been asleep for a couple hours, something that Calum was extremely jealous of, she could always just fall asleep whenever and wherever. He'd held her close when they had gotten into the bunk after the band and they had played an intense round of Mario Kart, Clementine's laugh ringing out throughout the bus as. Michael had decided to call it a night, no longer being able to stand coming in second place and especially after Luke had beaten him and he was brought down to third.

With one of his arms wrapped around Clementine, their soft whispers about the day they'd spoken in the darkness of his bunk. Calum felt her breathing even out and eventually heard the soft snores leaving her body, with her mind in dreamland, Calum was left alone with his racing mind. The last couple of shows had been exhausting for him, his body still not accustomed to the ever-changing time zones they seemed to be experiencing every day. He was tired, exhausted even, of waking up after restless nights in a new city or in some cases, a new country. He was tired of the constant interviews that all asked the same questions. He missed the days when he could run home to his mother on the days when it all became too much. Calum was just tired and eventually, his brain shut off for long enough that his eyes closed and sleep overtook him. 

It wasn't much of a  surprise to the rest of the band and Clementine that Calum wasn't himself lately. He'd been grumpy ever since the bus had pulled into whatever arena they'd be playing at the next day. Clementine had noticed how his hands wouldn't stop shaking, his fingers playing an invisible bass. She had tried to cheer him up, to get him to talk to her about how he was doing. She even tried distracting him with pictures of Duke that the dog sitter had sent her and all she got was a simple nod before Calum walked off the tour bus with the rest of the guys, off to some radio show they'd have to do before they had the rest of the day off to explore whatever city Calum hadn't bothered to look up when he woke up to his alarm blaring. He was like this sometimes, locked away from the rest of the world as his sunglasses shielded everyone from seeing his tired eyes, so the car ride to the radio station was quiet and lonely for him, the rest of the band lost in their own conversations as he tried to get a couple extra minutes of sleep. 

Clementine had been checking out at a local grocery store when she got the call from Ashton. A sigh leaving her lips as she rushed to pay for the few essentials she'd picked up for herself and Calum. Ashton's retelling of the radio show made her nerves run wild as she made her way back to the arena, knowing she was walking into a situation her and Calum had only been in once before. Calum's bad days were an accumulation of multiple days gone wrong, finally spilling over. The man was known for his blank expressions, never showing emotions whether they be good or bad. So whenever those emotions did spill over, Clementine knew that he'd been holding something in for far too long. 

When Clementine saw the other three men standing outside of the tour bus, small smiles on their face, she realized that either Calum had kicked them out or he was a lot more bothered by this morning's events than Ashton had let on over the phone. Giving Aston's arm a small squeeze, Clementine walked up the steps and onto the tour bus. The lights weren't on, the windows filtering soft light into the bus. Calum's soft cries were heard throughout the bus, the only other noise was the bus engine, which hummed like a song you hear in a dream. 

Calum looked out of the tour bus window, his eyes focusing on the birds outside. Anything he could do to get his mind to be blank. He hadn't slept since yesterday, his mind was awake after the radio show, the adrenaline pumping through his body and mind. Even now, when the sun was shining through the bus windows, Calum was sitting on the couch, his fingers tapping against the couch as he watched the birds fly away when they'd eaten all the crumbs, moving on to their next destination. 

Making her way to the back of the bus, Clementine felt her heartbreaking as she saw Calum. His shoulders shook with every sob he let out, his body curled under a blanket with his back turned to the door, his gaze focused on the outside world.. The soft knock against the wall Clementine made caused his head to perk up and turn to look at who the intruder was. His eyes were overflowing with tears, his nose red from his hoodie sleeve coming up to wipe away his sadness. He stayed silent as he sat up, pulling open the blanket as he looked at her, his brown eyes pleading for her. Once she was in his arms, Clementine wrapped her arms around his torso, pulling him close as she laid back against the couch. They laid like that for what seemed like ages, Calum's cries muffled against her shoulder as she ran a hand through his hair, her lips pressing kisses to his curls every once in a while.

"I...I don't know what happened. I just couldn't play the damn notes and I couldn't remember the right words." Calum finally spoke after his tears had died down a bit, his voice shaky as he pulled Clementine closer to him, his face nuzzling itself in the space between her neck and shoulder. "I didn't feel like myself, didn't feel like I was putting on a good show for the fans and they all just seemed to laugh it off. And the stupid questions they kept asking were just...it's like they don't even know us, we're not teenagers anymore and they talk to us like we are I couldn't...I was an asshole to them, to the fans, to the guys, and even to you. I'm sorry..." He mumbled, his voice laced with sleep as his tired eyes closed, his brain wishing he could tell her about everything he was feeling.

Watching Calum sleep, Clementine couldn't help but hold him a little closer than normal. He was so good at hiding his emotions, she knew that the radio show going bad wasn't the reason for the breakdown. But she wasn't going to push him more than he had already pushed himself these past couple of days, she'd noticed the lack of sleep. How his eyes weren't as bright as she was used to while they explored arenas and the city sights whenever they had a chance. She'd noticed how he hadn't told her any facts about the cities they'd seen the last week, he hadn't mentioned the wonky buildings in Amsterdam and their meaning. He hadn't been Calum, and Clementine wasn't going to push him into admitting what was really wrong until Calum was ready to say it out loud. Looking back down at the sleeping man, she pressed a kiss to his forehead before her own eyes closed and she joined him in sleep. 

Clementine's arms were around Calum when he'd woken up, her hands running through his curls as she tried to soothe his anxieties, his worries, his fears. His body had stopped shaking a while ago, his sobs being replaced by soft breaths as he listened to the soft words Clem spoke into his ear. She'd only ever seen him like this once before when his thoughts overran him and the pressure of the world became too much for him. It was when their relationship first took a turn into something more than just sex, it was the first time he'd slept over at her place. It was when Calum realized that Clementine was different, that she was more than just a distraction from whatever the hell was going on in his mind. It was when he realized that Clementine was someone he wanted in his life whether that'd be as a friend or more. And as she let Calum cry into the band shirt he'd gotten for her from the merch stand a couple days ago, Calum knew she would always be there for him, in the good and bad days. 

Calum's head raised from her chest, his puffy eyes meeting the guys' as they walked onto the tour bus. Ashton's smile made Calum sigh, his body sitting up as he turned to face them. He knew he should say something, but all he could manage was a shrug of his shoulders as he ran a hand through his hair. 

"Alright, Hood. Let's get some good food in you. We got a whole night out planned." Ashton nodded, chuckling as Calum shook his head and sighed, "Oh come on, when have I ever led you wrong?" 

Calum's mouth was on fire as he ate the noodles, coughs escaping him as he took a sip of his milk tea. The guys laughed at him, Ashton teasing him about how he told him that the spicy was going to be too spicy. But Calum was always up for a challenge and he was going to finish his noodles even if it meant his taste buds would be gone for the next couple of days. Clementine laughed softly,  leaning against his arm, her lips meeting his cheek. Her laugh brought a smile to his face, his eyes looking over at his friends and then they landed on Clementine, who also seemed to be in as much pain as he was from the spicy food.  The guys had planned a whole night out for Calum, none of which included a club or a beer. Which Calum was eternally grateful for, he didn't think we could handle a night out with paparazzi following them and then having to wake up with a hangover tomorrow. 

After a very spicy and laughter-filled dinner, Ashton led them all to a park nearby, the place lit up with music and stalls offering different keepsakes. The night market was bustling with people, no one seeming to mind the group of them walking from stall to stall until they found their way to the open grass field where the music playing in the air seemed to float up into the stars. Even as they all sat down in the grass, a bottle of cider passed between them all, Calum felt like he was in a dream, a  dream he didn't want to wake up from. He felt warm, Clementine's hand was holding onto his arm, seeking warmth as he looked up at the night sky, his attention shifting to his best friends who seemed to be laughing at how Luke was horrible at trying to speak to the German shopkeeper earlier that day. His own laughter surprised him, the bottle of cider being passed to him as Michael went off into a story about how he'd almost broken his guitar at the last show they'd played when he tripped over a microphone stand Luke had thrown. Calum felt his worries slip away from him, even if it was just for a moment, he was happy about it. He felt content, he felt safe, he felt like everything would be okay in due time. Calum realized at that moment that this was home to him. That being there in the park on a cold winter evening with his best friends and Clementine, that was home. It might not always be perfect, hell, it was almost never perfect but at that moment as he sat in the freezing cold next to them all, he knew he'd always be home as long as he had them all by his side. 

[vipclifford]

Wildflower - Chapter 2

here’s the previous chapter

Soulmate AU where things in your life appear as flowers tattooed on your skin, each with their own meaning.

Calum inspected his newly acquired bloom in the mirror the next morning. It was small in size, which was good despite the fact that the bright blue petals made his skin look bruised. He rubbed frustratedly at the flower in hopes to make it go away, but that only made the petunia stand out more against his reddened skin. His actions were futile and he knew it. He pulled his shirt down in anger before storming out of the bathroom, unwilling to stare at the reflection of a cursed man a second longer.

He hated the fact that a stranger he had met twice had managed to mark his skin with such ease. He hated the fact that of all people, Calum was forced to associate his bloom with Rory, the girl he could only describe as a bitch. Because she was a bitch. He hated the fact that his body now housed two undesirable blooms.

Duke’s paws padded against the wooden floorboards as he made his way over to Calum, nudging his dad’s calf with his furry head to remind him that it was time for his daily walk. He crouched down to stroke the dog’s head, a gentle smile tugging at his lips for the first time that day. A walk could do them good.

The park was busier than usual, presumably to do with the fact that a small Christmas market had established itself there for the duration of the month. The smell of cinnamon and chocolate lured Calum closer to the stands that each year he fought hard to avoid. Maybe it was because he missed home, but Calum was always reluctant to embrace the wintertime Christmas culture. It made him feel like he was losing the person he used to be.

Calum remembers his first Christmas away from home.

He was staying in London with his four best friends, excitement in their eyes as they watched snowflakes fall for the first time in their lives. Christmas carols were playing in the background to get them in the yuletide mood; the roast dinner smelled amazing and multiple gifts were tucked neatly beneath the Christmas tree.

But everything felt so wrong to Calum as he sat down to eat his dinner. The fact that the sun had set at 4pm and that the temperature outside was below zero felt wrong. The fact that his usual barbecue had been replaced by a roasted chicken felt wrong. The fact that he was trapped inside a thick jumper when Calum was used to spending a shirtless day by the pool also felt wrong. All he could think about was his family, spending Christmas day in the sun as God intended. And it was that very day, at that very dinner table, that Calum bloomed a sprig of golden wattle on his forearm. The spirit of the Australian people.

He wrapped his coat tighter around his torso as he searched the makeshift aisles for the hot chocolate stand. The market was filled to the brim with children running around, racing each other to see who could reach the small grotto first to meet Santa. Calum smiled to himself as he noticed the excitement on their faces, ecstatic to meet the man who supposedly left them gifts every year.

The smell of chocolate became stronger and stronger with every step he took until Calum was finally standing in front of the place he was looking for. The hot chocolate stand.

“Hi Calum,” said the person he least wanted to see at that moment, standing across the wooden counter with a small smile on her lips. Rory.

He couldn’t help but roll his eyes at the odds of meeting her here. “What can I get you?”

“Medium hot chocolate,” he grumbled.

Calum stared at the ground as she prepared his drink, hoping to minimise their interaction as much as possible. She placed his drink on the counter but when he went to grab it, Rory pulled it away from his grasp. “Can I help you?” he muttered in confusion at her antics.

“It’s on the house if we could have a quick chat,” Rory said somewhat hopefully.

Calum pulled out the money that was due from his wallet and placed it upon the counter, pushing it slightly towards her with an unamused expression. “In that case, I’m even more inclined to pay.”

“In that case, I’m not giving you a choice. We’re having a chat,” Rory told him with determination, pushing the five dollar bill back towards him. She told her coworker she was talking her break before leaving from the side of the stall, Calum’s hot chocolate gripped between her fingers.

Calum released a frustrated sigh as he tucked the green note back into his wallet before following behind her. His hands scrunched up into fists as he thought about things he hated. Rory, the fact that he was following Rory like a whipped fool and Michael for indirectly putting him in this situation in the first place.

She sat down at a bench and waited for him to join her before speaking.

“I think I should apologise for whatever happened last night. I don’t actually know what you bloomed but you’re clearly pissed off at me so I wanted to say sorry,” Rory explained, watching as Calum unhooked the leash from Duke’s collar to let the dog run around freely. “I’m sorry.”

Calum took a long sip of his drink and fuck did it taste as good as it smelled. Rory took his silence as a hint that he still didn’t want to talk.

“You were right, you know? I was never validated as a child. Mommy never complimented my drawings. Daddy never came to any of my ballet recitals. But I wasn’t bullied for my bra size, thank you very much. I was bullied for the yellow carnations on my back.” Disappointment. The universe had deemed her a disappointment and Calum was feeling sorry for himself because of the small petunia on his hip. Calum’s angry bloom suddenly didn’t seem so bad. “So yeah, I’ve got an inferiority complex and I’m a bitch. But I’m a bitch that’s sorry.”

“I don’t need your apology,” he mocked, keeping a straight face. “Your words can’t change what happened, they do literally nothing to help me.” Calum held back a teasing smile when he saw Rory roll her eyes playfully from the corner of his.

“Touché,” she commended, tightening her ponytail. “What did you bloom?”

“Why do you work at the Christmas market?”

“I’m volunteering.”

“How selfless of you,” Calum nodded, not quite expecting that response from Rory. Duke ran back towards the bench and hopped onto Calum’s lap, muddy paws dirtying his jeans. “Fucking hell, Duke,” he sighed, placing his drink beside him before lowering Duke onto the ground. He grimaced at the sight of his trousers, hands trying to wipe the dirt off of his jeans.

“He’s a good boy,” Rory remarked with a playful tone, watching Calum hook the leash back onto Duke’s collar.

“The goodest boy,” he affirmed, a hint of sarcasm in his voice. He picked up his drink as he stood up, holding it out in the air to draw Rory’s attention to the cup. “So, we’re good? I don’t owe you anything?”

Rory shook her head, tucking her hands into the pockets of her coat as she stood up. “You don’t owe me anything.”

“Happy New Year!” greeted Calum as he let the friends of his friends flood into his home, ready to drink into the next year with semi-familiar faces.

Calum was hosting the New Years Eve party this year with his roommate Roy. Over the past three years, Calum and his band mates had taken turns throwing the annual celebration and this time the responsibility had fallen onto his lap. Calum didn’t mind though. New Year’s Eve felt the same wherever he was in the world, and Calum wasn’t one to turn down any excuse to party.

The speakers blasted classics through the decades, bouncing from one hit to the next for hours on end. LEDs lit the apartment in colours ranging from red to green to blue as he bounced to the rhythm of the music with his friends.

“I’m going out for a smoke,” he told Luke who shook his head incredulously at him, lips tilting upwards when his tipsy boyfriend began pressing kisses to his cheek.

“Weren’t you going to quit?” Luke yelled over the music, arms wrapping around Adrian’s neck to pull him closer. And then they were kissing, lost in their own little world before Calum got a chance to reply.

A small part of Calum envied them. He envied the forget-me-nots that covered the skin of Luke’s shoulder blade, matching the ones on Adrian’s hand. He envied the way they held each other softly, lovingly, like the only thing that mattered to them in that moment was the man in their arms. Calum longed to feel that way about someone. He yearned to have what they had.

Roy yelled that there were fifteen seconds left until midnight, turning down the music to let his voice be heard, and soon enough the whole apartment was counting down the remaining seconds. Calum was glad Roy had interrupted his envious thoughts before a jealous hydrangea bloomed on his forehead.

Excitement bubbled in Calum’s chest as he thought of the year ahead, happy that at least he’d be starting it off right; drunk and surrounded by all of his friends.

So much can change in a year.

His eyes met Rory’s across the room as they pronounced the last number and the clock struck twelve. Surrounding couples joined their lips together while the rest of the room erupted into cheers. It was only when Luke and Adrian wrapped their arms around him, excitedly yelling ‘Happy New Year!’, did Calum come out of his daze.

“Happy New Year guys, I love you,” Calum grinned, embracing his two friends back. He playfully rolled his eyes as they mocked his words of affection before going to find his other friends to wish them the same thing.

“You came,” he noted, somewhat surprised when he found Rory up on the roof terrace, leaning on the metallic railing beside her. She gave him a quick nod while she blew out a cloud of smoke.

“Michael invited me. You don’t mind, right?” Calum shook his head, hand reaching out to grab the cigarette she offered him.

“It’s New Years, anyone is welcome here tonight,” he smiled softly before taking a drag. “Happy New Year, by the way.”

“Happy New Year,” Rory repeated as she reclaimed the cigarette, fingers almost brushing against his during the exchange. Almost. “Any resolutions?”

“Uh, I don’t know,” he shrugged, brows furrowing when he heard the music turn off downstairs. “Excuse me,” Calum muttered as he made his way back down to the party.

Everyone appeared annoyed despite their inebriated state, trudging their legs towards the front door. Calum pushed past his guests to reach the front of the crowd, finding a policeman standing menacingly beneath the doorway.

Sounds about right, he thought.

Calum felt helpless as he watched his friends flood out of his home. His neighbours just had to file enough noise complaints to shut his party down, one hour into New Year’s day. They just had to ruin his first glimpse at the new year, tainting the months ahead with a feeling of dread. If the first hour had been bad, Calum didn’t want to know what else was coming his way.

He eventually walked back into his living room, confused when he saw Rory frantically searching for something around the room. Calum leaned against the door frame, watching her with an intrigued expression. “You alright?” Calum questioned, turning on the normal lights to brighten up the place.

“I can’t find my fucking jacket,” she complained as she retraced her steps a third time. “Both my phone and my keys are in there.”

Calum looked around the apartment with Rory for wherever it could’ve been misplaced, the pair of them ending up empty handed.

“I’ll ask around, it should turn up tomorrow if anyone’s got it. Do you have a way to get back home? Or to get in?”

“Uh, yeah, I live around six blocks from here and I’ve got a key tucked into a top secret hiding spot just in case. So, uh, see you next time.”

“I’m walking you home,” Calum stated, already making his way to the hallway where he could grab his coat and keys. Rory chased behind him speaking words of disapproval, telling him over and over that she would be fine on her own, that she didn’t need him to protect her. “You can’t change my mind, Rory,” Calum said pointedly, opening the front door. “I’m walking you home.”

“At least make me a hot chocolate for the road.”

They found themselves in his kitchen a few minutes later, countertops filled with spilt whiskey and empty beer cans. Rory managed to find a clean spot she could hoist herself onto as Calum carefully read the instructions at the back of the packaging. His curls covered his forehead, trying their hardest to reach his eyes but failing.

“Did you forget how to make it, or what?” Rory teased.

“I just want to get it right.”

A warm mug of hot chocolate eventually made its way into Rory’s hands who hummed in delight after the first sip.

“Task completed successfully.”

There was an air of awkwardness surrounding the pair as they walked down the barely lit streets, sodium lampposts painting what little they saw around them yellow. Music could be heard from the windows of apartments nearby and Calum did all but curse their neighbours for not getting their parties shut down as well.

“I think that my New Year resolution is to work out more,” said Calum, answering the question she posed at the rooftop in hopes to interrupt the silence.

“That’s such a shit resolution,” Rory snorted with a soft shake to her head. “It’s up there with quitting chocolate and procrastination. It’s the kind of standard goal that boring people set themselves because they have no true aspirations.” Calum rolled his eyes playfully at her words, kicking the can that was resting in his path.

“What does an interesting person like you choose for their New Years resolution, then? I need inspiration since apparently I’m so boring.”

“Can’t tell you or else it won’t come true,” she shrugged, tone nonchalant.

“It’s not a birthday wish,” he said incredulously, concentrating on not letting Rory kick the metallic can away from him. “Or are you too ashamed to admit that you’re boring too?”

“I guess we’ll never know,” she replied, a mischievous smile on her lips once she finally managed to kick the can onto the parallel road.

Calum was forced to face the adjacent door to Rory’s apartment once they reached it, not allowed to find out where she kept hidden her secret key.

The place was small, though it was also the perfect size for a person living alone. Paintings of flower-covered skin filled every inch of her walls. The colourful petals looked vibrant against drawings of shoulders and ribcages, standing out beautifully against flesh of different tones. Calum took a few fascinated steps closer to study the artwork, astounded by the realism and detail.

“You’re an artist?” Calum asked, turning his head away from the wildflowers on the wall.

“Aspiring artist,” clarified Rory, stepping towards the windows to close the curtains. “I work at a tattoo parlour though, so I still get to produce art in a way. On people, not canvases, but we’ll get there one day.”

“I’m sure you will,” Calum hummed, knowing from experience that if you really want something, it will happen. Or perhaps he was just lucky. “You’re really talented.”

“Thanks,” she murmured, throwing her hair over the chrysanthemums on her shoulder. Calum nodded politely as he took a few steps back towards the open front door. “I think I better get going.”

“Why did you walk me home?”

“What do you mean?” he questioned with a confused demeanour, hand resting on the doorknob.

“You know what I mean,” she insisted calmly, making her way to stand in front of him. Rory was tall, taller than average, and yet she still had to lift her chin up to face Calum. “Why did you walk me home?”

“Why did you let me into your apartment?” Calum challenged with a teasing grin, leaning his arm on the wooden door frame. “I only planned on walking you to the building to make sure you were safe, but you insisted on me making sure I took you to the door. You also asked me to make you a hot chocolate.”

“What are you trying to say?” she spoke almost menacingly, though there was a playful layer wrapped around her voice.

“I think those were all tactics to spend time with me,” he explained cheekily, mischief in his eyes. “You like me.”

“I do not,” Rory huffed, horror painted on her every feature.

“I’m only teasing,” Calum chuckled softly, stepping backwards into the hallway. Rory rolled her eyes at him, clearly unamused. “This was fun,” he admitted, tucking his hands into the pockets of his coat. “We should do it again sometime.”

“In your dreams, Hood.”

The sun was beginning to rise as he walked the empty streets, occasionally walking past a drunk group of friends that made their way back home after a wild night. Calum felt the familiar tingle on the back of his calf, waiting a few nervous seconds to see the new bloom upon his skin. It was a lotus flower. New beginnings.

Calum’s lips curled into a smile as he looked down at the soft pink petals, excited for what the year had to bring.

taglist: @cashtonasfuck​ @koalacal​ @maluminspace​ @castaway-cashton​ @calumsmermaid​ @punkrockpreferences​ @itsshynotshay​

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[little-merry-go-round]

There’s a lot of shit that was bothering me lately and i need to get it out of my system. I understand a lot of you don’t wanna read that kind of stuff so i’m tagging discourse and putting the rest of the post under the cut. Hope it’ll work

The first thing i wanna talk about is the way Jack interact with us here on tumblr but also on reddit. Do you remember favouritism drama that happened last february? People were pointing out Jack rebloging from same people all the time, he said he doesn’t do it on purpose, things were talked out and were ok for a while. However we came back to the same place again. I wouldn’t call it necessary favouritism but idk, ignorance maybe? I payed attention who Jack rebloging from, who’s posts he see in reddit vids. Before ya’ll jump on me, i don’t blame artists or people who he interact with at all. I’m glad they post and i hope they continue. The point i’m trying to make is Jack going through most popular most of the times. I don’t know why is this. I tried to ask him, i tried to ignore it, i tried to convince myself that i’m just jealous bitch and he does care about us all still equally. It’s really hard to think that when you see over and over popular creators, who already got good amount of notes, being featured in vids/ rebloged/ interacted with. Again, i don’t blame creators at all. I just feel frustrated that smaller creators doesn’t have chance to be seen, not only by Jack but by anybody really since a lot of people avoid tag to not see tea blogs posts. And then Jack saying in videos that he’s sad creators leaving… Are you surprised? Really? It was going fo so long and nothings changing in that regard.

I remember Jack said something along the line once “it’s better to interact with few than to not interact at all”. That’s true when “few” changes constantly but if it’s same few over and over you shouldn’t be surprised when people feel like worse of a fans and leaving.

“Draw for yourself, not for Jack”. Yeah, i do. I do draw and colour and i’m being creative whenever i have time. I just don’t post that often here anymore. Don’t be hypocrite. You all posting in the tag because you want to be seen. If you wouldn’t be seen you wouldn’t post in tag or even anywhere online. It’s very easy to say “notes doesn’t matter” when you get feedback whatever you post. I don’t want him to interact with everybody. A little bit of variety wouldn’t hurt tho.

I’ll quote something he posted on tumblr early this year: “I know I reblog and interact with certain people here more than others, I don’t think it ever really occurred to me properly because I usually just fly through the tag each day and interact with stuff as I see it and what it pertains to. It’s never been on my mind to do it for some more than others or “play favourites”. Some people are just FAR more active here than others and in the tag way more often, so just by sheer number alone it would make sense that I would see their stuff more as it’s usually more current. I’m sorry if people felt left out or underappreciated as a result of that. It’s a byproduct of things rather than the intent.” First of all I don’t believe he doesn’t recognize people artstyes at this point. Secondly it’s not hard to see the same popular people if you only going through most popular posts.

Another thing that’s bothering me are charity streams. Not that Jack raising money, that’s good. I’m not that much of a bitch. I mean the way streams are handle. Jack seems often unprepared. I don’t talk about games here, but about charity itself. Shouldn’t he know more about them instead of reading what they’re doing from their website? It was especially bothering me with team trees charity because this topic is talked about a lot and it’s really not that hard to find informations about it. “Let’s plant 20mln trees and save the planet!” No hun, it can and will help but it won’t save the planet as you claim.

“You’re going on the board” pissing me off so damn much everytime. I never watch streams if i don’t feel well mentaly because of that board thing mostly. I understand that you wanna reward people somehow, i get where it came from but again, it’s so unfair. Let’s give example. There’s person A who have a good job and earn quite a lot. It’s no problem for them to save thousand or two for charity. They will go on the board for that. There’s person B, who has shitty job, or is unemployed a lot of time. They have health problems and strugling everyday. They still wanna help out and give a dollar for a charity every month. Are you familiar with a biblical story about widow from Luke chapter 21? That’s what i mean with this example. Did you notice the way Jack read donations? How pumped he is when somebody give thousand dollars or at least few hundred and how he rush through one dollar donations? Because i did. Please don’t come to me saying he’s not guilt tripping people because he does. I don’t believe he’s doing it on purpose but don’t tell me you never felt that way. I just don’t believe you.

Forced PMA. This was talked about many times. Jack said it’s not about being happy all the time. Most of the community agree, yet i constantly see PMA = no negativity mentality and Jack incourage that by liking that kind of posts. Jack used to play “serious games” and tried to take opportunities to talk about mental health and about reaching out to friends, parents and getting professional help if it’s needed. I don’t blame him for not playing that kind of games anymore but he switched from that to making meme videos, and God forbid, yelling “a meme a day keeps the depression away”. And people take it seriously. They really do. I saw with my two own eyes on jse discord that somebody said they have depression and they don’t feel too well and another person replied with - go watch some MEMES because a meme a day keeps the depression away hehe. What is this??? Is it really the message you wanna send? Just google those memes. They’re disgusting.

Tea blogs. Again, are you surpriced they’re there? Are you surpriced that when one get deleted another two or three appear? I’m not at all. Because everytime someone try to voice their opinion respectfully (especially more popular people in community) they get anons saying things from “that’s not very pma of you”, “You’re just jealous”, “Jack would be disappointed”, “Jack doesn’t want you here”, “If you don’t like him then leave” to “go kill yourself”. Nobody want to get such lovely message. To avoid that they’re going to tea blogs. Sure, there is a lot of hate there too. Sure, there are people who just wanna talk shit and spread lies. But there are also issues like the ones i wrote above. They won’t disappear if we won’t talk about them. I do care about Jack. I really do. I want him to do well and i want have good time watching his vids. i wanna interact with people who i met in this community. That’s why i’m writing it all, because i believe we’re better than that. I wanna see us improve not go down.

I really like what Jack tweeted and deleted  "We all need love & support in life but also need someone to call us on our shit now and then. Don’t surround yourself with just “yes” people".

[wolfpawn]

I Hate You, I Love You, Chapter 102

Chapter Summary -   The media make comments regarding Danielle's friendship with Emma and two "fans" of Tom's are less than nice to Danielle.

Previous Chapter

Rating - Mature (some chapters contain smut)

Triggers - references to Tom Hiddleston’s work with the #MeToo Movement. That chapter will be tagged accordingly.

authors Note - I have been working on this for the last 3 years, it is currently 180+ chapters long.  This will be updated daily, so long as I can get time to do so, obviously.

All image rights belong to their owners

tags: @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog​​​​ @jessibelle-nerdy-mum​​​​ @nonsensicalobsessions​​​​ @damalseer​​​​ @hiddlesbitch1​​​​ @winterisakiller​​​​ @fairlightswiftly​​​​ @salempoe​​​​​ @wolfsmom1​​​​​

If you wish to be tagged, please let me know.

Tom Hiddleston’s new girlfriend use sister to get closer to the actor.

Betrayed – Tom’s sister betrayed by a supposed friend to snag the Marvel actor.

From neighbour to bridesmaid to girlfriend, Danielle Hughes’ scheme to snag actor.

Danielle was somewhat startled to see her name being dragged around online after two weeks of the pair being made public, but she knew that when her link to Emma was found, the leeches would try and use that to get their drama. She just hoped that it did not hurt Emma’s feelings. X-ing off the tabs she had put up to read the tripe, she sighed and decided that rather than mope about what was being written, she would just get a cup of tea. There had been other articles, all saying how she was perfectly suited, she was a true friend of the family, not some PR stunt, but she wanted to see the negative, she wanted to know the worst that was being said. Walking downstairs, she looked at Tom, who was pacing the living room, script in hand, his face contorting as he put on his Loki persona, channelling the character so to give the words on the page more substance, she watched as he made a note on the already doodled script and reread his additions, the tip of the pen between his parted lips. When he realised he was not alone, he looked up from the page. ‘Hey.’

‘Hey, I am about to make some tea, would you like some?’

He thought for a moment. ‘I’ll have a coffee actually, I need the extra caffeine.’

‘Sure thing, give me two.’ She smiled and walked to the kitchen, taking the kettle and filling it with water before pressing the button for it to boil. Halfway through taking the items she needed out of the press, however, she paused for a moment before putting them back in and getting her purse from the countertop and walking out the front door, grabbing her jacket as she did so.

The trip to the café was nothing spectacular, there was a risk of rainfall and the temperatures were slightly above average, but other than that, nothing seemed extraordinary. Getting their orders, she decided to treat herself and get some all-butter shortbread as well before leaving the premises. It was only when she was across the street did she realise something was amiss. Turning around, she noted two girls, both about seventeen years old at a stretch coming towards her. Sensing things were not as they should be, she turned and continued walking, deciding to not give any sign she was concerned.

‘You fucking tramp,’ One girl shouted. ‘you don’t deserve him. You’re fat and ugly.’ Danielle ignored her and walked on, noting that a dog walker stood looking between her and the girls.

‘Some friend you are, using someone to fuck their brother.’ The other girl started, again, Danielle did not act as though she heard anything.

Down the street she continued, both girls goading her, both berating her, and any around them staring on, shocked as the girls continued, while Danielle said nothing nor did she look anywhere but ahead of her.

It was only when she got to the street the house was on did she even pause for a moment. She was worried that she was leading the two less than polite girls right to her front door, where who knows how long they could remain in search of Tom. She also did not want him to realise what had occurred, she wanted him to never find out about it. She was wondering what to do when a car pulled up beside her, she did not look at it at first, not wanting to add to her woes, but when the driver called ‘Elle’ she looked over, relieved to see Luke looking at her. ‘Get in.’  He had barely said the words when Danielle ran around to the passenger side door and jumped in, all the time getting new comments about her being a slut. ‘Are you…?’

‘Just drive, please.’ She begged, her eyes starting to blur up with the tears in them. ‘Just…’

Luke said nothing and did just that, taking a left at the next junction rather than the straight road that led to Tom’s home. ‘I’ll bring us there in a moment, I just don’t want them finding the house.’

‘I know, that’s why I stopped when I realised they were going to follow me home, I didn’t want them to know where we lived.’ Danielle explained.

‘Good, that is good, I saw you didn’t react to them either, that is perfect.’ Luke commended. ‘What they said…’

‘They wanted a reaction, they wanted me to say or do something, make me seem crazy, get a story from me.’ She stared straight ahead as she spoke. ‘Right?’

‘Exactly.’ Luke nodded. ‘There are a few everywhere. Emma Watson’s boyfriend had them too, that he was too boring and ugly for her, that he was too dumb.’

‘I didn’t hear, did they call me dumb?’

‘Yes, I realised it was you just a second before I heard the words “dumb bitch” being used.’ Luke informed her, watching her for her reaction. ‘Are you alright?’

‘As much as anyone can be when two little…’ Danielle inhaled deeply, holding the breath for a moment before exhaling again. ‘I won’t let them get to me, they are jealous and juvenile. They want nothing but the man they see on posters and posing for photographs, they are just horrible people, me getting mad won’t change that.’ She was not even speaking to Luke, in particular, only trying to placate her own anxiousness. It was then she realised that they were outside the front of the house. Danielle looked around to see if she could see the pair. ‘I don’t have coffee for you.’ She realised. ‘Tom never said you were coming.’

‘Tom is rehearsing, he’s more than likely after forgetting I was coming.’ Luke chuckled. ‘With regards to the coffee, I think I will survive on the three I have already had today.’ He smiled.

‘Luke,’ he was about to open the door when Danielle spoke, causing him to pause. ‘Could you perhaps not tell Tom.’ Luke frowned. ‘He would take it personally and annoy me about it if he found out.’

‘Are you not taking it personally?’

‘No, they are just two jealous bitches, they are annoyed that while they are busy trying to convince themselves they are nice people worth his time, I am the one that is with Tom, and that is killing them. I don’t give a fuck what they think. Are they about to go home and see Tom rehearsing, knowing that tonight at bedtime, Tom will be in bed with me, no they are going to be hugging their pillows, pretending it is him.’

Luke paused for a moment, thinking about what she said. ‘That is your decision to make.’ Was all he stated in response before getting out of the car. ‘By the way, I had a few of those articles pulled down, the ones regarding you using Emma.’

‘They don’t matter, I got a text from her not fifteen minutes ago planning for us to go out next week, it is safe to say we are closer than ever and their shit-stirring doesn’t matter.’

*

Danielle was putting on the vegetables for dinner when Tom stormed into the room. ‘Hey, everything alright?’ she noted the angry look on his face. ‘Tom?’

‘Why didn’t you say anything?’ his voice was more hurt than angry.

‘About…?’

‘What they said.’

‘Sure, we knew that they would say that once they found out I was friends with Emma too, it’s hardly noteworthy.’ Danielle dismissed, wiping her hands with a tea towel.

‘What, what are you talking about, what are they saying about you and Emma?’ Tom asked confused.

‘What are you talking about?’ Danielle was equally as confused.

‘The two girls in the street, what are you talking about?’ Tom paused, ‘Wait, there were two incidents?’

‘This morning, someone realised I was friends with Emma and went for the whole, “used our friendship to snag you” malarkey.’ Danielle explained.

‘And the two girls in the street?’

‘Were just two jealous teenage brats who thought I would be bothered by stupid comments.’ Danielle stated. ‘I told Luke not to mention it to you.’

Tom’s brows rose, ‘Luke knows?’

Danielle froze. ‘Crap, he didn’t say it?’

Tom folded his arms. ‘No, he failed to mention such things when we were talking, it was Jeremy, remember him, he came to the house that night?’ Danielle nodded. ‘He messaged me asking were you okay. It’s online that you were verbally attacked walking down the street. What else have you and Luke been keeping from me?’

‘Nothing.’ Tom looked at her sceptically, ‘Honestly, only that and the ticket to Kong.’ Danielle stated.

‘Why didn’t you say anything?’

‘There is nothing to say, we knew there would be one or two that would do this, there’s no need to get mad about it.’ Tom looked at her for a moment, swallowing as he did. ‘You’re not mad,’ she realised. ‘You’re scared?’ He did not deny it. ‘Scared of what, that I would hear those words and leave; that I would let two little brats make me run from this, from us?’

‘It’s not the normal strains of a relationship, you never asked for this.’

‘Yes, I did. I got with you knowing exactly who you are and what you entail. I knew about the fangirls and the craziness and I chose to get involved.’ She pointed out, walking over to him, wrapping her arms around his waist and looking up at him, ‘I chose to allow myself to love you, and this is what it entails. I don’t care about them, I don’t care about their words. Em and I are going out together again next week and they are still going to be miserable in themselves.’ She gently slid her arms up his torso to his face. ‘And I have you. I am not going to run Tom, I made that mistake already, I won’t make it again. I am not going to run just because I am scared or don’t like what is being said, I promise.’

Tom gently pulled her against him, holding her so she could hear his heart beating in his chest. ‘I don’t want to lose you for something so inconsequential.’

‘You won’t.’

[reylo-trash-4ever]

FRIENDS IT IS I. HERE WITH MORE REYLO FANFICTION

Can’t believe I actually wrote this in one sitting... sorry if it’s shitty but I just wanted to get this ‘exposition’ stuff out of the way so that the REAL fun may begin! WHOOHOO!! Get ready for a wild ride my reylos!

As always, MUCH LOVE to my besties @scav-eng-er and @mojona1999 for being the coolest ReyloMates ever and for suffering through my endless snl “live tweeting” with me!

And special shout out to @lana-n95 and @firethebluesky for always supporting me. Enjoy! 

THE GAME: Chapter 3 (a Modern Reylo AU)

Word count: 2850

His voice was low and silky. He must have regained his composure before she did as she felt the skin of her palms being pierced by nails from fists she didn’t know she clenched. Her vision focused on him and him alone, as if they were suddenly the only people in the world. The surroundings faded and there was a white hot anger swelling in her from the very tip of her toes on up. 

“Oh good, I see you two have already me then?” Amilyn’s voice somehow found its way through the ringing in Rey’s ears, but she could do nothing besides stare into the face of the mysterious man before her. She didn’t respond, and there was an awkward pause where she realized the question had been directed her way.

“Not exactly,” the man spoke up first, answering for her, “we ran into each other last night, but nothing more.” 

The casual way he blew her off made her anger boil further and she noticed the subtle jab at ‘running’ into each other. If she remembered that encounter correctly, it was his carelessness and haste that caused the collision. She had nothing to do with it, and she hated the way he already seemed to twist the narrative to make it look like she was to blame.

“So you haven’t been properly introduced then?” Amilyn asked while motioning for Rey to take a seat opposite her and next to the man, who still stood. Her feet felt like they were stuck in place, and it was like walking through thick jello with every step she forced herself to take closer to them. She finally made it to the chair, giving Amilyn a nod and the smallest twitch of a smile in thanks. She took her seat and noticed that the man remained standing until she was fully below him. Only when Amilyn also sat, did he lower himself to their level, but even sitting down his presence seemed to flaunt over them. 

“Rey, this is Kylo Ren. He’s been with the company for a few years now, but he travels between firms so you probably haven’t had a chance to see him work in action before now. He’s an accomplished lawyer with many cases under his belt, and his father is-”

“That’s enough Amilyn,” Kylo cut off his superior before she could continue. Rey gaped at his audacity and waited for the cold response of Amilyn, but it didn’t come. Instead, she did the last thing Rey expected; she apologized to him.

“I’m sorry, Ren. I didn’t think it would be an issue here.” Her voice did come off as slightly chilled and Rey detected a greatly hidden offense, but it was nothing like the stern tone she often took with her employees. Rey couldn’t believe what she was hearing and wondered who this ‘Kylo’ had to be to make Amilyn the one to apologize when he was clearly in the wrong. 

“As I was saying, Rey” she continued, turning to look at her again, “I’m assuming you already made the connection that Kylo is who you will be working the Terrio case with. He will be an incredible asset to this specific case and a wonderful addition to our team. I’ve long awaited the days when he would return to us.”

Even though they were praising, there was a delicacy in Amilyn’s words, as if she were afraid that by saying the wrong thing, Kylo would react poorly. Rey tried to keep her eyes trained on the woman in front of her, but she dared a few glances at the man. She could feel his demeanor shift from pompous superiority to boredom. Amilyn was speaking as if he were her own son, something Rey found herself alarmingly jealous of, and he was on the verge of acting like a teenager who couldn’t care less.

There was a pause in the conversation where any normal person would show their gratitude towards such high praise, but Kylo didn’t respond. After a few more awkward moments where both of the woman simply stared at him, he finally spoke.

“Now that all of that is out of the way, are we ever going to get to start on this so called ‘important’ case?” Kylo leaned back in his seat, propping his left foot over his right knee and taking up an impossible amount of space with his lengthy form. 

“Ben,” Amilyn sighed, dropping her professional airs and rubbing her forehead with her hand.

“I told you not to call me by that name,” Kylo snarled suddenly, but Amilyn continued without even seeming to notice. Rey wondered why she called him ‘Ben’ instead of the previously mentioned ‘Ren’. Amilyn was not one to make simple errors on something as important as a name. 

“If you’re going to work with us, you need to have more respect for our process. Your mother told me that you were willing to cooperate here, and I fully expect that to happen. I will not go easy on you because of your parentage and you will listen to what I say.” 

Rey felt like she was put in the middle of some kind of family quarrel and she suddenly felt extremely uncomfortable. She looked to the floor, hoping that was the respectful thing to do, and heard Kylo try to make retorts, but Amilyn kept giving him no time to cut in. Should she leave? This didn’t really feel like it was about her anymore and she didn’t know what to do, or even if she should do anything at all. 

“Need I remind you of the consequences if this doesn’t turn out like your mother hoped it would?” Amilyn said in a hushed town, and Rey could sense a threat when she heard one. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Kylo clench the handles of his chair so hard that his knuckles went white. 

There was another long silence and Rey was about to scream from discomfort, every inch of her body begging her to run away, but finally it was broken by Amilyn. 

“I’m sorry, Rey, we’re going to have to cut this short. I’ll fill you in on the details when I’m finished here. Please close the door on your way out.” 

Rey knew it as an instant dismissal and she shot out of her seat, thankful for an excuse to get the hell out of that situation. She practically leapt from the room, crossing the long distance between the doorway and the chairs in a mere few strides. 

It wasn’t until she was fully out of the room, the door almost shut behind her, did she realize she left her bag with her laptop and case files inside. She silently cursed herself, wishing to god she didn’t have to go back in.

Mustering up all of her courage, she meant to knock and go back, but the conversation coming from inside made her stop. She knew she shouldn’t be eavesdropping, but she couldn’t help it when she heard her name. 

“Rey is incredibly talented, Ren, and I want you to teach her,” Amilyn sounded more serious and intense than she previously had. Rey wondered if she had been putting on an act in front of her, or maybe it had been for her? 

“She’s a kid!” Kylo hissed. 

“She’s a woman with high potential,” Amilyn corrected. Rey’s heart fluttered with the praise, “and I will not have you ruining it for me. This is your last chance to make your past mistakes right. Your uncle asked me to-”

“My uncle is a piece of shit!” Kylo yelled, and Rey heard his chair skid on the floor. She imagined him angrily rising from his seat with enough force to slide the chair out from under him. His intimidating height gave her those chills again as she could see the scene in front of her as clear as day. 

“Luke is a legend at this firm and if you want to hide your relation to him and your mother, that’s your choice and none of my business. But, you are sure as hell going to have to keep your temper in check.” Amilyn’s voice was as cold as ice now and Rey found herself wanting to shiver with a new kind of chill. She prayed she would never have to hear that directed towards her. 

It seemed to have done something to Kylo as well. There was a beat in their conversation and when he spoke again, his tone had calmed somewhat and his words were slow.

“I did not come out of my own volition, or because I had any desire to be here, in the slightest. You will be wise to remember that, Holdo.” 

“And you will be wise to treat your superiors with respect, Ben Solo.”

Rey’s mind clicked with something at the name. Weren’t the women in the office talking about a ‘Ben’ the other night? And Amilyn had used it just moments before. Was it not just a slip of the tongue? 

What caught Rey’s attention more than anything was the family name she used directly after. Solo… why was that so familiar to her? 

Suddenly it hit her like as fast and as forceful as a train. Solo was the name often associated with the whole Skywalker company. If she remembered her research right - which she always did - Solo was the last name of the man who helped the CEO create to company. He co-owned the business, although he himself didn’t practice law. Luke Skywalker, the world renowned and super famous lawyer created the business with his brother in law, Han Solo. Han married Luke’s sister, Leia, and they had a son together who Luke took under his wing from a very young age. The stories regarded him as a genius and he was quickly in line to take over the company for the both of them when he came of age. 

Except, he apparently wanted nothing to do with it. He was a spoiled rich boy born into high society New York who had a silver spoon thrust into his mouth since he was a baby. Even though he was known to abhor those of his class, his attitude was always that of someone who regarded himself ‘better’ than everyone else. He was reportedly one of the biggest assholes you could ever meet, but everyone constantly sucked up to him because of the standing in life that his friendship, and money, would gain them. Rey thought that sounded like a very lonely way to live. 

The rumors were that he and his uncle used to be very close, but they had a huge falling out, and it was the reason for Skywalkers early retirement. The company scrambled without him and his sister, Leia Organa, took over in his stead. She ran the business fairly, but when it caused a rift between her and her husband, they split shortly after. Everyone said the divorce was their sons fault because of his rowdy and rebellious antics and they couldn’t control him without Luke’s help.

That’s when Ben Solo fell off the face of the earth. Rey heard of this ‘Kylo Ren’ but she never suspected it was a fake persona for the man trying to hide his family name. The realization of everything suddenly hit her. Amilyn Holdo wanted her to work with the CEO’s prodigy nephew?! The son of the current leader and of the infamous Solo?!

She realized that Amilyn must have high expectations of her, and the thought was almost crushing in its responsibility. But Rey also found her excitement welling up within her again. She loved nothing more than a challenge, and working with that prick of a man was going to be just that. 

Suddenly, the door opened in front of her and she almost fell inside. Luckily, she caught her balance and saved herself from looking like a fool. Except, her eyes widened as she realized she was looking at the feet of Kylo Ren, or rather, Ben Solo. She slowly looked up as he glared down at her. 

“Were you listening to our private conversation?” He practically spat at her, making her wince. 

“N-no! I just forgot my bag,” Rey stuttered a whisper, trying to look inconspicuous, but knowing she failed miserably. What else could she have been doing? It was obvious that she probably heard every word of their very personal dialogue. 

“Is there something wrong, Kylo?” 

She heard Amilyn use his disguise name from behind them, knowing that his large frame completely hid her from sight. Was he going to expose her in front of their boss? It was an easy way to get rid of her, eavesdropping would surely make her lose favor with Amilyn and would give her the wrong kind of attention. 

Ben’s mouth twitched once before twisting into an evil grin as he never broke eye contact with Rey. She felt her stomach drop and she found she couldn’t breathe. She was completely at his mercy, and from the look on his face, that was something he didn’t posses. 

“It’s nothing, Holdo,” he said over his shoulder, still watching Rey, “I seem to have forgotten my things, is all.”

In one swift movement, he shoved the bag he already carried on his shoulder towards Rey with such strength that she was forced back a few steps and out of eyesight from anyone sitting at Amilyn’s desk. He turned around and she watched him move out of sight only to return a few seconds later with her own bag clasped by one of his large hands. He shut the door softly behind him, and turned to look at her expectantly. Rey realized that other people were beginning to file into the office for their day of work. She still clutched his briefcase with both arms across her chest and stared up at him with disbelief. 

“Why did you do that?” She demanded after he refused to say anything or make a single move. More bodies were coming from the elevator and they were quickly being outnumbered by easily gossip mongering men and women. Rey wanted to be seen with Ben as little as possible, and she could only imagine the rumors they would start by standing so close together in a small doorway. 

“Because now,” Ben breathed, leaning in close and whispering in her ear, “you owe me.” 

Rey’s eyes were wide and she instinctively shoved him away from her. Her cheeks felt hot and her brain was fuzzy. How the hell did he always get the better of her? 

“What is that supposed to mean?!” She said hotly, watching his smirk turn into a frown of obvious annoyance. 

“It means that you have to do whatever I say, kid.” 

He said the word as an insult and Rey felt humiliated. She huffed in response and rolled her eyes, trying her best to look as nonchalant as possible. She didn’t want him to keep thinking that he could get under her skin so easily. 

“I don’t think that’s what Amilyn meant,” Rey challenged, “now would you please give me back my bag?” 

Ben’s dark eyes flashed angrily and Rey could tell that his importance wasn’t used to being challenged. She could see the anger threatening to break loose from his fake ‘calm composure’ and she braced herself for the explosion.

But it never came. Instead, an idea seemed to form in Ben’s mind and the cockiness returned to his eyes, although he continued to glower at her. 

“Actually, I think I’m going to keep this,” he said, tapping on the bag he now had slung over his shoulder, “think of it as a get-to-know-you exorcise. You keep mine and I’ll keep yours. Should be interesting to learn a little bit about each other, no?” 

Rey glared at him, concern quickly growing in her with every word he spoke. Did he really think that was a good idea?!

“That’s ridiculous,” she said, pretending that her heart wasn’t pounding at the idea of him sneaking through her personal belongings, “you wouldn’t even be able to get into it because you don’t know the password.”

“Oh don’t worry, sweetheart, I’ll figure them out.” 

“Stop calling me that,” Rey retorted, making Ben raise an eyebrow at her ferocity. He simply shrugged his shoulders and stepped out into the hallway as people walked past them. 

“I think I’ll work from home today. We’ll meet up tomorrow once we’ve ‘gotten to know each other’ a bit more, I think.” 

Rey didn’t have any time to reply as he walked through the sea of people flooding in. He was easy to spot over the heads of everyone else, and Rey tried to rush after him, calling out that she still had no idea what he meant, but he made it to the elevator before she could and the doors slid shut in front of her face. 

And just like that he once again left her in complete and utter shock and silence. 

[painandpleasure86]

I Cannot Believe It’s True

A/N: Hi there ppl! I never participated in a ship week like this time… Thank u Mel aka @roger-taylors-car for hosting this special week ❤️

This little DeazelloNeighbors'AU haves the previous chapters:

Ch #1 “My new neighbor it’s my crush”: https://painandpleasure86.tumblr.com/post/190777536948/my-new-neighbor-its-my-crush-deazzello-week

Ch #2 “Gimme your comfort, I suffer of love”: https://painandpleasure86.tumblr.com/post/190796228203/gimme-your-comfort-i-suffer-of-love-deazello

Ch #3 “Life-changing decisions (and a lot of suspects)”: https://painandpleasure86.tumblr.com/post/190811616233/life-changing-decisions-a-lot-of-suspects

Oh! This time, I took the prompts Valentine’s Day and Cheating.

I deleted previous post because I posted it so late and with some imperfections... Also, yesterday was an occupied day (plus Valentine’s Day date with my bf). Sorry :(

I hope to post for Day 6.

Summary: a disaster was about to start…

Warning: Angst, Fluff and a pinch of humor.

Word count: 2300

Permanent taglist: @warriorteam1924 @toomuchlove-willkillyou @deakysgurl (if you want to be in this list, send me a msg or ask)

If you liked it, please reblog! That will help me to reach to more ppl :3

***********************************

Were long days without him. He wasn’t that happy. But, taking what he learned in acting school, he always was smiling, being kind, working hard in the dance studio.

A nice way to cheer him up was, ironically, help to Ronnie. Joe really liked that woman. She always was so kind, smiley and also even after 6 kids she still was beautiful. He couldn’t deny that, even being gay. “John straight taste was nice”.

How he helped to the mistress? Taking care of the children meanwhile she was to buy some groceries, gone to the hairdresser for her dye or meanwhile she was taking a bath or cooking.

Robert and Michael were old enough to take care (Robert was almost 19 and Michael almost 17) even Laura with almost 15 years; so he took care of the three youngest. To him, was so great. He loved baby Cam, and Luke that he was starting to walk… Joshua had 10 years old, but he also kept an eye over him.

Once he trapped Josh looking for porn mags at his dad’s office.

“How you know that? Isn’t something of your age”. asked Joe to the boy.

“I trapped to my dad once with his hands under the table and I asked what he was doing”, replied Josh without shame. He continued talking. “The strange thing is, that in that pics I didn’t saw women… but I didn’t found it repulsive at all. They’re getting sex between them because they’re alone and… they also have needs”.

That words couldn’t came from his own.

“You really thinks like that?”

“Were words of my Dad and looks credible to me”.

Joe couldn’t found words then to explain that Josh dad was gay.

“Please don’t tell to my dad that I found his mags with that naked men… and never to my mom!” begged Joshua.

“Promise” and Joe extended his right pinky finger.

The guy understood the signal and extended the pinky finger from his left hand and intertwined it with Joe’s pinky finger, smiling.

“Redhead power!” said Joe, raising his left arm.

Josh laughed.

“We’re the best!” exclaimed Josh.

That happy smile made Joe being sad internally. Josh was like a little redhead John.

Laura always was watching at Joe with love eyes. And was paradise to her when she hurted a bit one of his feet and Joe hugged her to comfort her. When Joe listened “y-your pa-parfum it’s so nice” he could knew that Laura was better. “Yeah sweetie, your dad also loved it…” thought Joe.

Ronnie didn’t left to Joe to grab Cameron often, but when that happened… he felt like he was with some of his younger cousins or better, with a step brother. That baby was his weakness. “You’re a cute boy!” he often said to the baby, giving a  smooch in the little forehead. Cameron always gave in response a cute giggle. But this time, that happy face didn’t made him remember to John. Cam haves Ronnie’s face.

———-

February 11th Ronnie received a call when Joe was around there.

“Take care of Cam and Luke please” said her, running to the phone.

“Hello?”

“Hi Ronnie!”

“John!!! How are you? we’re missing you here!”

The man smiled.

“I’m tired Ronnie. I just want to stay at home…”

“When you will come back?” asked the mistress.

“I’ll be there before Valentine’s Day. Tomorrow.”

Ronnie told to her offsprings “Dad will comeback tomorrow!” They smiled... And Luke said “Dad?” His first word.

Ronnie started to cry. She grabbed Luke in her arms.

“Ron.. Ron?”

“Oh sorry John! Luke told his first word, finally!! Come on son!”

The toddler didn’t wanted to say anything.

“Put him in the phone”

The baby started to listen his dad’s voice.

“How are you, little bud? I miss you so much!”

The baby didn’t said anything, just giggled.

Joe, having Cameron in his arms, watched at Luke’s eyes and cheer him up to speak. “Come on Luke, you can do it little champ!”

And Luke said “J-joe!”, pointing at the redhead.

John couldn’t react.

--

(In Montreux)

Roger saw John paralyzed with the phone in his hand and against his left ear.

“Deaky… are you okay mate?”

Trying to speak, he responded “Luke said his first word… and wasn’t mom or dad. Was the name of my new neighbor”

“Oh I see that Ronnie it’s having fun without you, then” joked Roger.

Deaky watched at Roger pretty annoyed. With that face. He preferred to not answer and continue talking with his family.

Roger approached to Brian then.

“John it’s acting rare..”

“Well, Roger, he’s so sensitive. Perhaps he isn’t in the mood to joke as he used to be.”

“No, not only for that. When he mentioned a couple of times to his neighbor, his cheeks flushed and his eyes brightened a bit.”

“You’re right Roger. I see that he loves to his neighbor” joked Bri.

“I think that’s serious. That he’s a kind of platonic love of John. But deaky didn’t wanted to accept. You know how’s deaky with things about his private life. If he didn’t want to tell to us, better not ask”

“I know it Roger. I know at the same person. I just hope that, at least he can have a nice Valentine’s Day.”

-------

Ronnie was asking “John? Are you there? John?”

“Sorry Ron. Roger made me a bad joke.”

“Haha! Do you wanna talk with the kids?”

“Sure”.

Joshua and Laura approached to the phone and talked a bit with their dad.

Meanwhile, Ronnie told to Joe “thank you for your help, really! The kids loved you!”

Joe smiled and his cheeks turned red.

“Now you’re the one with their cheeks flushed” joked Ronnie.

Both laughed.

“Was an honor Ronnie. Your kids are so great. And this little bud” pointing to Cameron with his chin “the cutest baby ever… well also Luke, haha! Don’t be jealous, man!” he added, caressing a bit Luke’s head.

Joshua screamed “mum, dad want that Cam listen his voice”.

Joe, watching at the woman, said “take to this bud.”

“No Joe. Gave to John a surprise and speak with him!” exclaimed the woman.

Joey, holding Cameron with his left arm and hand, took the phone and he said “Hi sir”

Another moment of silence for the bassist.

“John? Are you listening me?” asked worried Joe.

---

Meanwhile, John’s bandmates watched to him staring in silence.

“Joey” he finally replied in a sigh and smiling.

“See… he’s in love with that man” pointed Roger watching the scene.

“Let John alone Roger! If he’s happy…” said Brian. “Let’s coming back to our business” concluded.

----

“I- erm we miss you John… also this little guy that I have in arms! I must to confess that I love to be with your family”

“Even Ronnie?” John joked.

“Of course! I was helping her these last days.”

“It’s ironic… but well! Put me to my son to the phone please… we will talk tomorrow Joey.”

“Okay."

Joe approximate the phone to Cam’s left ear.

"Hi my little piece of heaven! How are you?” he said with the softest voice ever.

The baby giggled intensely.

“Dad loves you so much!”

The baby babbled.

All there were smiling for that cute scene.

Joe took the phone again and said “to Ronnie again?”

“No Joey. That’s all. See ya soon. Lov- take care of yourself”.

“Bye John”.

Both hung up.

Joe said “I think that I should to go to home…” and gave Cameron to Ronnie.

“Stay for the dinner, I even made a lactose free dessert for you”, she said, receiving to her youngest one.

Kissing to Ronnie in one cheek, he replied “I’d love that. But I want to sleep. I need that.”

“It’s okay Joe. Come tomorrow to have dinner with John please. He would be so happy to see you when he come back”.

“Tomorrow I’ll be here.” And watching to Cameron, he said “bye bud!”. Luke said “Joei” and extended his arms. Joe hugged to the little boy that was sat in the floor. “Bye champ!”

Josh and Joe made their “redhead power” salute.

“MICHAEL, COME HERE TO OPEN THE DOOR TO JOE” screamed Ronnie

He was until the stairs and said “No. Look how I’m dressed, plus outside it’s cold.”

“Excuses Mike, when Samantha came here you were dressed with that pajamas and you didn’t cared at all to go outside and close the main door” replied Laura, kinda upset.

Michael couldn’t respond better thing that “It’s better that you go to open the door to him, I listened how you says sometimes I love you joeeeeey ” meanwhile you’re sleeping.”

Laura’s cheeks were extra red. Mike made his bad action for that day.

Joshua started to mock Laura, but Ronnie stopped him.

Joe, in response of Mike’s confession, hugged Laura.

“You’re so cute, I like your style, and I know what you mean when you give me a flash of that smile but girl, you’re only a child ” Joe sung.

Laura laughed for the reference.

“I love that song, have my age! That’s so cool”.

“Great, but also there it says why I don’t reply to your flirth”

“I know... but anyways you’re so beautiful”.

Leaving the embrace, both walked to the main door. Laura still having that blush...

————--------------------------------------------------

John came back. Finally. And was huge his surprise when he saw Joe in the familiar table.

“Joe? Here? I-”

He stared at the scene and his offsprings came to greet him.

“You will say Dad again?” the man asked to his son Luke.

“Joei… Dad” pointing to Joe.

John laughed and hugged to the toddler.

“Luke really likes you Joe. Thank you for help to Ronnie” said with Luke in his arms.

“And you don’t greet me?” asked Ronnie giving a kiss in John’s lips.

Joe was a bit jealous.

Josh made a disgust expression.

“Hi Ron, this meal smell so delicious! Sorry, i’m hungry…” And watching at his youngest in Ronnie’s arms, he said “Hi my little piece of heaven!”

Leaving to Luke in his special chair, he said to Ronnie “I need to talk something with Joe…We will comeback soon.” In a whisper, he added “I’ll pay something for came to help you”. The men disappeared.

Both men were to the studio of John,there they hugged so tight for five minutes. Just hugged. In silence.

“I missed you so much Joe.” said finally the bassist.

“Me too… being here cheered me up, until I recognized that almost all your kids have the same smile that you have.” admitted Joe.

“Was masochist then” said the elder, leaving the embrace and caressing the right cheek of Joe.

“No… Well a bit. But was fun. I love to your children John.” replied the redhead. “And I love you. I do since a lot of time.” That last words were the speech that once his father caught saying to the mirror. Grabbing John’s face with both hands, he added  “Before knowing you in person I loved you. Now, even more. You’re the one…” and gave to him a sweet kiss in his lips. “Let me be your Valentine… the only one.”

John down his sight.

“I want that… but I can’t. My kids. My family…”

Walking to the door, Joe started to cry and say “You should think a bit more in you!” and watched at that greenish eyes again.

“Have the balls to do it, please. You’re happy with me, no? You told me how nice was to be alone and hug me… Don’t refuse to be happy” and he covered his face with his hands. Were a lot of tears.

After a couple of minutes, he said “I’ll go to the bathroom to wash my face. I don’t want that everyone watch at my eyes and ask me what happened”

When he opened the door, Joshua and Laura were there. They listened enough.

“Are you the boyfriend of my dad?” asked Laura, surprised.

“I’ll better call to mum” said Joshua serious.

“NO JOSH, COME HERE” screamed John and running behind him.

But John couldn’t catch to his son.

Meanwhile, Joe asked to Laura “Why you’re listening private conversations?”

“Mum wanted to call you and Dad because the chicken was ready, and well, instead of knock, we stared listening to dad and you talking… You’re the boyfriend, no?”

A question that Joe was about to reply, but Ronnie and the rest of her children were there.

“Kids, to your rooms… This is an adult conversation. Mike, take care of Luke and Cam meanwhile, please”.

Michael, with his brother Cameron in arms, said to Laura “I told you that those screamings were moans! And you didn’t wanted to believe me!”

Laura entered to her room, crying.

——–

Ronnie closed the door of the studio. Joe and John were there.

“I cannot believe it’s true… You, again... cheated on me… WITH A MAN! IN OUR HOUSE! BECAUSE NOW I UNDERSTAND WHY JOE SCREAMED. HE MOANED!!” Watching to Joe, she continued speaking… “YOU, PLAYED WITH ME AND MY KIDS, ACTING LIKE A KIND MAN. WHY YOU DID THIS TO MY FAMILY?”

“Ronnie, y-”

“DON’T CALL ME OF THAT WAY AGAIN JOSEPH.”

Watching to John, she added “AND YOU… GO AWAY OF THIS HOUSE. GRAB YOUR THINGS NOW”

“Veronica, I wanted to tell this soon…”

“HAHA… You know something John? I don’t believe you”.

The woman left the room, crying.

---------------

Both men left the house.  

“I’ll take a taxi and I’ll pass the night in an hotel. Again.” John told to Joe.

“Well John, in some moment that should happen…”

Both hugged tightly again.

“Love you John”.

“Love you Joe”.

And Joe started to go to his house.

Now there, his parents asked to Joe “What happened there? We listened some argues”

“Ronnie discovered that John cheated on her…” and, watching to his father, added “With me” replied Joe.

****************************

Again, if you liked it, please reblog! That will help me to reach to more ppl :3

Cheers, Lily

[highfivecalum]

Wouldn’t Miss A Chance {CH} 8

Previous Chapters: One Two Three Four Five Six Seven

❋ ❋ ❋

SOPHIE’S HEAD POUNDED as she sat at the dining room table, spinning around the cereal that was in her cup with her spoon, while Ashton and Luke talked about last night. Sophie was too nauseous to eat anything from her hangover, so she watched as the cereal turned soggy, repulsing her even more. “Mornin’ everyone,” Calum’s raspy voice spoke and Sophie looked up from her cereal to see him in a pair of sweatpants, a white t-shirt, and the worst bed head she had ever seen.

“Hey Cal,” Ashton spoke through his mouthful of cereal and Sophie scrunched her nose up at her older brother. “You hook up with Sarah last night? I saw the two of you leave together.” Ashton had a knowing smirk on his face.

Sophie refrained from rolling her eyes at the mention of the girl who was sucking Calum’s face off the night before. She hated that she was so jealous. “Nah,” Calum shook his head and poured himself a cup of coffee. “I took her home and dropped her off. Told her that whatever was goin’ on had to end.”

“What?” Luke laughed incredulously. “Dude she’s so hot. What are you thinking?”

“She’s alright,” Calum shrugged. His eyes bore into Sophie and she could feel them on her, but she didn’t dare look up, not wanting to meet Calum’s eyes. “I’ve got my eyes on somebody else. Somebody a lot better than her.”

Sophie dropped her spoon, it clanking loudly against the porcelain bowl, and she finally looked up at Calum. He was already staring at her, his mug in front of his mouth so she couldn’t see the small smirk that was on his lips. She rolled her lips into her mouth, tasting her chapstick, and tried not to give away that the new person Calum had his eyes on was her.

“Yeah?” Ashton cocked an eyebrow. “And who would that be?”

“You don’t know her.”

Lie. Total and complete fucking lie because Ashton knew Sophie better than anybody else did.

❋ ❋ ❋

Sophie hummed in contentment as her body sunk under the hot water in the hot tub. She had her hair up in a bun on top of her head, not wanting it to get wet, and lowered her body to her chin and closed her eyes. She had been living with Ashton and Calum for a little bit over a month and she hadn’t had the opportunity to use it. Ashton was inside watching movies and Calum was God knows where, so Sophie had the perfect chance to relax without anybody bothering her.

Sophie brought her waterproof bluetooth speaker out with her and connected her phone, turning the music up to a comfortable volume before sinking back under water. Sophie hummed along to the music playing when a familiar voice interrupted her alone time.

“Mind if I join you?” Sophie opened one eye, seeing Calum standing there in swim trunks with a towel around his shoulders. His soft brown skin looking way too inviting.

“Be my guest.” Sophie shut her eye and went back to humming along to the song. She heard the water slosh around and Calum hiss at the sudden temperature change and felt him finally get used to the water and settle in across from her.

The two sat in a comfortable silence; Sophie’s eyes still closed and Calum’s eyes nowhere but on her. She could feel his stare burning into her, but she tried to ignore it, tried to enjoy the water and forget about the fact that Calum had admitted that he was into her.

A song that Sophie didn’t like too much started playing and she reluctantly opened her eyes and crossed the hot tub, standing up and reaching over to pick her phone up from the table that it and her speaker were on. Calum watched her every move, not being able to keep his eyes off of her half naked body. The string bikini she had on didn’t cover much, her cleavage spilling out and most of her butt showing, leaving little to Calum’s imagination.

Sophie skipped a few songs until she stopped on I Wanna Be Yours by the Arctic Monkeys and settled back into the water, closer to Calum this time, and he reached under the water, his hand finding her ankle and tugged her towards him. Sophie’s eyes shot open at the sudden skin on skin contact.

“C’mere,” Calum mumbled, beckoning her over to him with his fingers, and Sophie didn’t hesitate to scoot down and sit right next to Calum, but that wasn’t enough for Calum. His hands found Sophie’s hips and he picked her up easily and set her on his lap. Her skin was so soft and his hands wandered up and down her legs, up her sides and arms, resting one hand on the side of her neck and one on her waist. “I can’t get you outta my head.” Calum’s eyes never left Sophie’s lips.

“Oh?” Sophie’s mouth lifted up into a smirk. She wanted to tease him, she really did, but the same was for her; she couldn’t get Calum out of her head. No matter how hard she tried. “Is that so?”

“Mhm,” Calum hummed and pressed his forehead against Sophie’s. Their lips were agonizingly close and all that both of them wanted to do was kiss each other. Lose themselves in each other. “Can’t stop thinkin’ about those lips of yours.”

“Watcha gonna do about that, Cal?”

The way his nickname tumbled out of Sophie’s mouth had him inching closer, his lips brushing over hers in a teasing manner, and Sophie had had enough of the teasing, the waiting, and the longing looks they sent each other from across the kitchen. So, without wasting any more time, Sophie smashed her lips against his, surprising Calum since he didn’t think she would be making the first move. Sophie’s fingers tangled in Calum’s hair and their bodies were flush together.

They sat there kissing, doing nothing other than that, and reveled in the feeling of lips on lips and the feel of their skin on each others. Calum had longed for her touch since the second she walked into his house and now that it was finally happening, for the second time, he wasn’t going to take it for granted.

“‘M turnin’ into a prune,” Calum uttered against Sophie’s lips, emitting a laugh from them, and she finally pulled away from him. She smiled at the sight of his plump lips and there was no doubt in her mind that hers matched his. “Should we move this party inside?”

Sophie’s words were suddenly caught in her throat at the new feeling of Calum pressing his lips to the exposed skin of her neck and collarbones and she had to hold in the moan that threatened to escape her parted lips. Sophie simply hummed in response and Calum pulled his mouth away from her skin.

“Come on then.”

Calum couldn’t wipe the boyish grin off of his face as he followed Sophie inside and up the stairs, not being able to tear his eyes away from her backside as her ass swung back in forth in her mini bikini bottoms. Calum felt like a lovesick teenager, but fuck it if he didn’t care, because it was Sophie that he was about to have sex with. Sophie; his best friend’s little sister. He knew of the repercussions of his actions, knew Ashton would have his head on a plate if he found out, but he couldn’t give less of a shit.

Calum was so lost in thought he hadn’t even noticed that Sophie had turned the shower on and stepped in, leaving the glass door open and looking at Calum expectantly. Shit, he thought. This is actually happening.

Calum’s lips were on Sophie’s in an instance and his hands wandered everywhere they could with her bikini still on. He didn’t want the material covering her anymore, wanting to see and feel her completely. Reaching his hands behind her he swiftly untied the top of her bathing suit, letting it fall the floor next to them, and united both of the ties of her bikini bottoms, those also following to their feet.

Calum leaned back, taking in every inch of her bare body and could feel his swim trunks tighten. They were still wet from the hot tub, cold now from the air outside, and Sophie could feel the cold against her body, so she took them off for him, tugging them down until they were pooled to his feet.

Calum had Sophie’s body pressed against the tile wall, strategically under the faucet so it was hitting their bodies, but not in their faces, and his lips were back on hers. Calum’s hands slid down Sophie’s sides and backs, landing on her ass and giving it a less than gentle squeeze, emitting a moan from her mouth and Calum took that as the perfect opportunity to slide his tongue into her mouth.

Their tongues didn’t fight, Calum’s dominated hers with little to no effort, but Sophie wouldn’t have had it any other way, loving that Calum was in control. His fingers slid through Sophie’s folds and hers jerked his length up and down and Calum let out a raspy moan against Sophie’s lips.

“Jump.” Was all Calum said, gripping the back of her thighs and hoisting her up. Back pressed against the wall, legs wrapped around Calum’s waist, the feeling of his hands on her skin; Sophie was in pure bliss. The longing looks, the kiss they shared in their kitchen at midnight, the way Calum looked at Sophie in pure and utter lust, led up to the moment of Calum sliding his length into Sophie. A loud moan left Sophie’s lips and Calum halted his actions. “Gotta be quiet, babygirl.” Calum whispered, his lips grazing hers. “Can’t let Ashton hear us. Yeah?”

“Y-Yeah.” Sophie exhaled the words and Calum smirked; she was already breathless because of him.

Calum’s thrusts, hard and fast, had Sophie’s grip on his hair tightening and sinking her teeth into Calum’s skin to suppress the loud moans that threatened to leave her lips. Calum liked the pain, loved the feeling of Sophie’s mouth and teeth on his skin, and he picked up his pace. Sophie’s free hand went between her legs, rubbing at her own clit since Calum didn’t have any available hands to do so himself.

Calum watched as Sophie threw her head back, it hitting the tile behind, squeezed her eyes shut, and bit down on her lips. The whimpers and moans were quieter than Sophie and Calum would have liked them to be, but they had to be cautious. They couldn’t chance Ashton finding out, not now, not anytime soon, so they stayed as quiet as they could be.

“Oh, fuck,” Sophie moaned rather loudly as Calum hit a certain spot that had her reeling and neither of them cared about the volume of Sophie’s voice, too caught up in that moment, too caught up in each other to worry about it. “Gonna cum, Cal.”

Calum groaned in response as he felt Sophie clench around him and cum. He quickly pulled out, one arm wrapped around Sophie’s waist to steady her and prevent her from falling, the other pumping himself as he came, the water washing any sign of it away as it swirled down the drain.

Calum panted, body slumping against Sophie’s that was still pressed against the wall, and rested his head in the crook of her neck. They both sighed in content and panted as they caught their breaths wordlessly. Calum slowly lifted his head up, examining the few marks he had left on Sophie’s pale skin and a lazy smirk made its way onto his face as he looked at a very breathless Sophie.

“Wow,” Sophie finally breathed.

“Yeah,” Calum laughed. “Wow is right.”

Calum turned the water off and slid the glass door opened and got two towels out of the linen closet; one for him and one for Sophie, and reluctantly handed it to her, not wanting her to cover her naked body. He had seen it once now and he knew, he hoped, he would see it again. And again. And again. “Thanks.” Sophie whispered and dried her body off- not needing to worry about her hair since it was only a little damp from it being in a bun- and wrapped the towel around her body.

Calum helped her out of the shower, shut the door behind the two of them, and cupped her face in his hands. Beautiful, Calum thought. “Sleep with me tonight?”

“Thought I just did that.” Sophie smirked tiredly.

Calum rolled his eyes. “Not what I meant. Sleep- just sleep, in my bed with me.”

“I can’t. Ash and I are getting breakfast with my mom tomorrow and I told him to wake me up. He’s going to come in my room and see I’m not there.” Calum pouted at the excuse. Sophie wanted to sleep in Calum’s bed with him, she really did, but she didn’t want to risk Ashton catching them. Not yet. “But another night? I promise.”

“I’m holdin’ you to that.” Calum warned.

“I figured you would.” Sophie exhaled a tired laugh.

Calum kissed her lips once. Twice. Three times. “Get some rest, yeah?” Sophie nodded her head. “Goodnight, Soph.”

“Night, Cal.”

That night both Sophie and Calum fell into a deep, dreamless sleep, and all either of them could think about was each other.

❋ ❋ ❋

Taglist: @wrappedaroundcal @allltimehemmo @catchinqcalum @plaidpantsluke @plainwhiteluke @irwinkitten @irwinvalentines @monsteramongmikey @talkfastfletcher @astroashtonio @irrevocablylukes @candidcalum @youmaycallmemrshemmings @complete-trash-101 @jupitergranger @sensationalmikey  @mysteriouslycali @lex-micole @sincerelycalum @calistheloml @kaxseychill @mermaid-merrick @verybelowaverage @honeycombcal @calumismyprince @trashforlili @forggetablle @ihatemyself21 @rexorangecouny @alotof1dlove @aybbblondie @dionnealberts @turtlenecktgc @nipplyportman @lauwenrodriguez @uncrowned-cal @ghstofcalum @cliffordcntrl @xx-cuddlemecalum-xx @checkeredcalum @thatonefangirlposts @it-was-a-lie @therainydays4 @booklove-2 @pattys-got-cakes @mpadge33 @pinkbubbles-and-bigtroubles @that1girlmary @sensationalmikey @buddhas-princess @nostalgia-luke @tothemoonwithclifford @calistajs @hopelessxcynic @dannisos @calpalbby @thebodaciouscth @parkerswebs @hood-af @blue-skies-are-alright @90s-good-vibes @sugarcoatedcalum @meanttobesecret @crystalisinfinite @toofadedtofight @girlstalkreality @mysticalbouquetblr @calumismyzaddyyyy @parkerspicedlatte @rip-lukes-balsamic @miahelizaaabeth

[crimsonbluemoon]

OhmToonz: I’ll Be Home For Christmas

I’m not sure if I’m going to get all of these done today because I’m probably getting too into this. I know I’ll deff get one more done, but I also wanna get some work done on Chapter 13 for Libahunt so we’ll see what the rest of the night holds. 

So until then, here ya go!

Ohmtoonz: “There’s a storm and omg I’m losing signal are you okay?? hold on let me drive 489432 miles to get you the night before Christmas”

“You’re stuck?” Ryan let out a sigh at the repeat of his words, glancing out the window of the common room of his college dormitory. His feet were buried in his bunny slippers, which had been unpacked from his suitcase. Snow poured down in the darkness, adding to the silence of the empty room. Most of the people in the dormitory had already left for the holiday season, but Ryan had been asked to stay behind as a Resident Assistant. “How the fuck are you stuck on campus on Christmas Eve?!”

“The storm came in earlier than I expected it to, and I can’t get to the train.” The night before had been a cluster in the college, as news of a terrible snowstorm heading their way made people leave early. He’d let the other RAs Momo and Squirrel leave the day before, knowing that both had large families that would be distraught if the freshmen weren’t able to make it back for the holidays. Being a senior meant he had less anxiety over the winter break, having done it plenty of times before. But the winter storm waited for nobody, and the dark clouds had come in much earlier than predicted by the weatherman. By the time Ryan had helped the last student out of the dormitory and done his rounds, the snow was up to his calves, and still coming down. It was pointless to try and trek the mile to the train station, especially when he didn’t even know if they were still running.  

“So you’re going to be stuck there for Christmas?” His best friend’s voice over the phone sounded strained, and Ryan blinked before he snuggled closer to the couch and sighed.

“The school’s sidewalks aren’t going to be their first priority to plow because there’s almost nobody else here. I might be able to get out tomorrow, but I’ll probably just wait until the snow fully stops.”

“You can’t just not come home. We’re supposed to go out to breakfast tomorrow, it’s a tradition!” And Ryan knew it was, no matter how far away from home he currently was. A two-hour drive and that was without the crappy conditions. Yet Ryan had made the trek every time in order to see Luke, the one constant in his life. Friends from school were nice, and the boyfriends he’d tried to date were always a pleasant distraction (from feelings he didn’t wanna talk about), but Luke was the one person that he always knew would be there without question. It’d been like that since there were thirteen and muddy from wrestling by the pond near their street.

It’d been how Luke had stolen his heart. 

“I’m sorry, Toonzy.” He hoped that his softer tone would show how sad he really was over missing the tradition. Christmas was a busy time for Luke, having a lot of friends and family to check in with. Ryan didn’t have that problem, as he’d stopped talking to his own toxic parents three years ago. Christmas morning breakfast was the only time the two carved out just for each other, and his stomach ached at thinking he’d have to miss his favorite part of the season.

“Is this because of last time?” The question came out of nowhere, and Ryan wasn’t sure the context despite flipping it over in his head.

“Last time?”

“When I-” A pause in the conversation was odd for Luke, and Ryan realized it was a technical glitch when fragments of his sentence came in. “--I won’t--just hold--soon.”

“Luke?” But nothing but static hit his ears, making Ryan sigh and end the call. He’d been hoping to convince Toonz to live stream a movie with him so he wouldn’t feel so alone, but it didn’t look like Luke was in a good place with service. Instead, Ryan shuffled his stuff back up to his room, ignoring the quiet that rung in his ears when burrowing under his covers and opening his Netflix to the Marvel movie selections. The bed felt cold despite the comforter, and Ryan wondered if it was more mental than temperature as he tried to focus on the movie playing on his screen. Picking the longest one he could find, Ryan pressed closer to his blankets and hoped that the empty feeling in his stomach would go away soon.

The end of the movie came fast, Ryan letting the attractive men and amazing fighting distract him. By the time Steve Rogers said his final line of failure, Ryan was half asleep, phone lazily clutched in his hand and nearly dropping off the bed. He was sure that sleep would claim him until a sudden vibration in his hand shook his away, Ryan yelping as his motion sent him and his computer crashing into the floor. Panic set in when he checked on his laptop, relieved to see the credits still rolling without a hint of damage. Focusing back on the thing that woke up, Ryan glanced back to the phone, mood lifting when seeing Luke’s name crossing his screen.

“Toonzy, you found service?” He asked, trying to hide his yawn when glancing to his clock. It was close to midnight, and Ryan guessed that Luke had managed to get back home from wherever he had been before. Maybe a party, from how long he was missing? He knew that Luke was spending his Christmas holiday with others. Their neighborhood always had a Christmas Eve party, and Toonz was probably warmed with spiced cider and happy memories of the holiday. The thought burned Ryan more than he wanted to admit. It wasn’t his friend’s fault that he was stranded. He had no right to be jealous, and yet here he was with clenched fists and a wounded heart.  

“I got service about an hour ago, but I didn’t wanna call while I was driving through this shit. Seriously, did mother nature decide all the fucking snow had to come in one night?” That made Ryan laugh, knowing how much Luke hated driving in the snow. It helped ease some of his bitterness away, leaning his back against his bed.

“Now you see why I couldn’t get home.”

“The fuck you can’t.” The statement threw Ryan off, and a weird noise bubbled from his throat loud enough for Luke to chuckle and continue. “Look outside, Ohm.”

“...No way.” Ryan’s feet were moving before he could get the words out, nearly tripping over themselves when they pushed up to the dorm window. His breath fogged up the glass for a moment, but he wiped it away with his sleeve in order to see what Luke was talking about. There, barely visible in the snow, was his best friend. Bundled up in ridiculous amounts of clothing and knitted accessories, yes, but still there.

“Luke, wh-what are you doing? Are you crazy?!” Ryan gasped out, already rushing to grab his shoes. Thankful he wore socks to bed, he jammed his feet into the boots before rushing out of the room, barely catching his friend’s response as he darted down the stairs.

“I wasn’t going to leave you here all alone on Christmas. Seeing you Christmas morning is my favorite part of the whole fucking holiday. Nothing’s cuter than that half-asleep face covered in maple syrup and eggs.” Ryan’s cheeks burned from emotion and exertion as he made it down the final few stairs, sprinting through the common room to get to the locked door at the front of the dormitory. Yanking it open, Ryan froze at Luke’s face peeking out from the scarf, which Toonz yanked out of the way before giving a hesitant smile. “About time you got out here, I was freezing my balls off.”

“It’s just breakfast,” Ryan blurted out, hands already reaching for Luke’s jacket despite not knowing if he wanted to push him back to his car to pull him closer for warmth. “You’ve got...so many family members and friends-”

“Christmas isn’t Christmas without the guy you’re in love with.” Their eyes met after Luke’s declaration, Ohm unable to close his mouth from shock. The roll of Luke’s eyes and huff of white air proved he thought the expression was unnecessary, hands grabbing Ryan’s wrists. “Yeah I know, don’t talk about it-”

“Wa-Wait, what? Don’t...what?” Ryan asked, not sure if he was dreaming. Did Luke just casually toss out that he was in love with Ryan? Sure that this wasn’t real, Ryan watched Luke hide a wince, shoulders slumping in a way that felt nothing like the confident, beautiful man he was used to.

“Last year, after breakfast? The card I gave you with your hoodie?” The words were spoken like Ryan should have had a clue, and he sort of did. Like tradition demanded, the two exchanged presents after breakfast was over, but neither were allowed to open the gift until after they got home. Ryan remembered the gift, his favorite hoodie which was now worn out from how often he wore it, but he had no idea what card his friend was speaking about. Luke didn’t look interested in reading the confusion on his face when he continued. “I got the message pretty clear when you didn’t say a word about it when we saw each other on New Years Eve.”

“Luke, what card?” Ryan forced out, getting to see his friend show confusion for the first time in the conversation.

“The one I put in the box, under the tissue paper.”     

“Luke, I was so happy about the personalized hoodie, I didn’t look in the box for more stuff. I’m pretty sure I just threw everything else away right after so I could wear the hoodie for the rest of the day.” Ryan spoke honestly, his heart racing when seeing Luke’s eyes widen after his response.

“You didn’t see the card.”

“So you drove all this way...”

“It was thrown away.”

“You thought I was avoiding you?” 

“You didn’t even know I-

“Luke, do you love me?” Ryan asked, hands releasing the lapels of his friend’s jacket to cup his cold face. The snow was covering them now, soaking through Ryan’s flimsy shirt and soaking his hair. But none of it mattered when he stared up at Luke, who couldn’t seem to maintain eye contact until Ryan spoke again. “Please, tell me you love me.”

“Of course I love you. Everyone knows it.” Except Ryan, who couldn’t stop his emotions from bubbling through his chest. Eyes blinked back tears of disbelief and joy, Ryan sure his sob of happiness seemed painful when Luke’s face crumbled. “Ohm, don’t cry. It’s fine, I’m not asking for shit I know I can’t have-”

“I love you so much.” 

“...What?” 

“I love you, Luke. I love you!” Ryan’s words felt like a dam releasing, laughing despite the tears falling down his face. Unable to resist the temptation he’d fought back for years, Ryan pushed up to his tiptoes, kissing Luke to prove his words weren’t a mirage. It was a slow burn of a connection, mouths quiet yet needy as they pressed closer together. Hands that hadn’t reached for Ryan now clambered to his waist, pulling him hard into the toned body of Luke. His own thumbs smoothed over Cartoonz’s face, as if committing him to memory while drowning in their kiss. They pulled away slowly, though Luke didn’t go far, brushing his nose against Ryan’s gently before pressing their foreheads together.

“Shit, that felt right.” Luke’s words of awe had Ryan giggling, content to relax in the arms that were circling his body and warming him up.

“Worth the drive?” Ryan asked, feeling the grin against his lips when Luke leaned forward to whisper into the new kiss.

“To bring you home to me? Every fucking time.”

Okay so this was a little bit of fluff and angst but TOTALLY still sweet so don’t yell at me! So as always, like, reblog, and let me know what you think <3

[theresnosafeharbor4myships]

An unexpected chapter Mr. Muse decided to add to Swept Away (earlier chapters here)

Swept Away: The Landscape of Life (also on 9L)

After all that’d happened, Daryl had expected to stay behind the walls a lot longer than four days. Lydia needed looking after, especially with her skittish demeanor and the way that several of the community folks felt about her. And Carol…he knew she was decently looked-after with the Kindomites, their friends, and Ezekiel always checking on her, but he couldn’t bear the thought of packing up and leaving her in her grief. After all, he alone understood how deep the sorrow ran, how the loss of Henry had also drug up the loss of a daughter none of them knew she’d had, compounding her sorrow.

With the demise of the Highwaymen and fear running rampant, the leaders had called a morning meeting and asked him and some of the other capable fighters to accompany the groups back to their respective homes. The fair had ended abruptly and felt frivolous and tawdry now, and everyone just wanted to return home.

He’d nearly refused to accompany everyone, instead deciding to remain at the Kingdom, but one look at Carol told him she wanted him to help. A soft nod, the intensity in her sad eyes, and a small, flat smile that told him she understood. He’d reluctantly agreed, and the leaders elected to set out the following morning.

Feeling antsy, he roamed the compound’s main square, watching everyone pack up their wares through wet or listless eyes and break down the tents like the destruction of their fortress.

“Hey, Daryl,” he heard someone call out, and he turned to find Yumiko and Magna jogging up to him, instantly putting him on guard.

What new emergency awaited?

“Hey,” Yumiko repeated in greeting. “How’s….nevermind,” she decided, looking to Magna for assistance.

“We brought these back from the wagon crash. Thought maybe…Carol would want one? Or you? Or the King?” She held out two wooden medallions, and he took them from her. “Gave one to Michonne and Aldan, Siddiq, Eugene, Rosita...we thought maybe…”

She let the sentence trail off as he stared at it, a crude H hewn into the circular coaster. Henry? Home?

Didn’t matter. He’d accept their token of sympathy and share it with Carol.

He nodded. “Thanks. I’ll give it to her.”

Yumiko nodded with the empathy of one who’d seen the ghastly border, and he nodded his appreciation before continuing on his way, putting the medallions in his pocket.

He dreaded fulfilling the promise he’d made, but he could hardly refuse her since she suffered in an altogether different way than everyone else. Accepted but an outsider, safe but still wounded and likely self-incriminating, Lydia had hesitantly asked him to take her to the empty stakes, to say goodbye to the boy who’d rescued her and given her something to live for—and to remind herself why she’d chosen to leave the monsters she’d never quite fit in with.

He’d wanted to rip the stakes out of the ground, use them as weapons to hunt and kill the ones who’d brutally slayed so many of their own with impunity, but the last time he’d been there—had it really only been two days?—he’d only had the thought, not the willpower to do it. Decimated, devastated, still reeling from his own grief, not to mention trying to hold it together for Carol and the others, he’d barely managed to wrap and bring home the only pieces remaining of the ten for burial.

He knew he’d have nightmares for years with the horror of the past few days, more visions from hell to join those he’d acquired like a collector.

Though he didn’t need the grave or the stake to say goodbye, he knew others did. Funerals, gravesites, memorials…those were for the living, not the dead.

Though the lines between the two became more blurred each and every time he looked.  

Feeling wearier than his forty-something year old body should, he slumped onto the steps of the theater, a long-forgotten token of joviality that seemed more mocking than haunted now.

His eyes roamed the grounds. Eugene and Rosita educating Rachel, Gabriel, and Michonne on the radios they’d built—an astounding feat of technology nowadays, and one he wished they’d had years ago; Aldan, Luke, Yumiko, and Magna helping others pack up; Jerry, Nabila, Siddiq, and Lydia playing with the kids in the yard away from the business of cleaning up the fair.

He hadn’t seen Carol since the meeting a few hours ago and wondered where she was. Likely with the King.

He sighed and dropped his head into his hands, rubbing his eyes with bottom of his palms. He wanted to check on her before he left, but not with the King around.

Ezekiel was alright in his book, but a bit too…fanciful for his liking. And for Carol, in his estimation. Always had been, and he’d nearly been bowled over when she’d chosen him as a partner.

He wasn’t jealous—he wasn’t, he assured himself—but he also never would’ve picked Ezekiel as a good match for Carol, and he often thought—too often for his own liking, if he were honest—that she hadn’t so much chosen the King as she’d chosen to become Henry’s mom and got the King as part of the deal.

Carol deserved someone who loved and appreciated her, saw her for the strong, compassionate, fierce, and loyal woman she was. He knew the King did those things, he could admit. But she also deserved someone who’d help alleviate the hurts she pretended not to have, who’d remind her that she’d rise like a phoenix after being burned, never to become ashes, who’d weather the forces of Carol until she remembered who she was and who she could become again.

That he felt sure Ezekiel couldn’t do that, if only because the King didn’t know Carol like he did.

“Hey.”

Carol’s voice broke through his thoughts, and he turned to see her plop down next to him on the shady steps.

Close. So close. Arms touching, legs inches apart, fitting snugly together with so much extra space around them.

“Hey.”

He stared out at the activity around the yard again, his thoughts leaving him too raw to say anything else.

“You taking Lydia today?”

Her voice, calm but heavy with emotion, startled him, and he looked at her, surprised. How’d she find out?

She stared at him for a moment before turning to watch the kids play. “Lydia asked me if she could go. She said she’d asked you to take her but wanted to make sure it was okay by me.”

He waited a bit before asking, “Is it?”

“I understand why she wants to go. She must feel…”

He heard the tears cloud her voice and regretted…so many things, he thought with a sigh, trying to safely tuck his earlier thoughts back onto a shelf.

“You sure you’re okay with this?”

“Mmm,” she hummed noncommittally. “Are you?”

He nodded despondently. “Gotta be.”

He realized as soon as the words had passed his lips that they’d dredged up one of the things that belonged to them. A phrase that told the other how hard they were trying. That’d somehow always meant a promise to keep holding on.

He meant it now just as much as he ever had.

She stared at his profile until he faced her again, an intensity in his eyes she hadn’t seen in years.

She recalled their lives before, the ones that had bent and shattered them into people who needed a mantra to speak of their hollowed out insides and faux-brave exteriors without falling into a weeping mass of trauma and brokenness on the floor.

They alone understood what this meant.

They alone were left.

“We can find someone else to take her,” Carol offered softly, the tears in her eyes brimming with ache for the man before her, all they’d suffered together, all they kept hidden inside, all they couldn’t let out.

“Nah…don’t feel right makin’ anyone else go back out there. She trusts me a bit…can’t give her a reason not to after all she’s been through.”

Carol nodded, resolved, brushing away the lone tear that had fallen down her cheek. She sighed and turned back to watch the kids playing, looping her arm through his and holding on tightly. “Come back safely, okay?

He covered her hand with his for a moment, gently reassuring her he’d heard. “I’ll let you know when we get back.”

They sat quietly for several moments, lost in the grief, watching the dichotomy of laughter and sadness play out before them, a confusing landscape of life.

Daryl reached into his pocket and pulled out one of the medallions, saving the other for Lydia. “Someone found this. Thought you might…wanna…”

He handed her the token, and she ran her finger over the H a few times before turning it over and over in her hand. “Thank you,” she breathed quietly, glancing up briefly at him before her eyes fell to the medallion again.

Still, he saw the tears pooling, the light he so loved in her eyes drowning in oceans of sorrow he wished he could mop up and drain away.

“I better head out,” he said quietly, regretfully, not wanting to leave her like this. Not wanting to leave her ever.

“Yeah…” She withdrew her arm from his, fisting her hands around the small token he’d given her. “Be safe,” she entreated as he stood up.

The concern and fear in her voice made him turn back to her once, everything within him crying out to stay put, to remain beside her until the loss felt less suffocating and more manageable, to just…be with her like he’d done the last time she’d experienced this cleaving of her heart, and the time before.

It wasn’t his place though, not anymore.

At least that’s what he told himself as he saw Ezekiel approaching out of the corner of his eye.

He nodded once in goodbye, then set out towards Lydia before he changed his mind.

[faejilly]

i am for you (10/?)

This chapter brought to you by that time I accidentally left Sucker on loop on Spotify for like three days. idk why either, that’s all I’ve got tho 

***

[misfit group mms]

[tessa]: oh, it's nice to be home on a Friday night [tessa]: I love the ALA con but my pajamas are so much more comfortable

[dot]: says you and Ragnor, maybe. The rest of you got any plans? I've got itchy feet but I can't decide what I want to do or where to go

[magnus]: you always have itchy feet

[dot]: you're one to talk

[cat]: so you're crowdsourcing for ideas?

[dot]: why not?

[cat]: Sorry, I have to work a double tomorrow, I'm with Tessa. Tea and putting my feet up, that's the life

[magnus]: Alexander and I are going dancing.

[cat]: I can see your giddy smile from here, you've got it bad

[magnus]: Yes, I do

[raphael]: you've had worse taste, I must admit

[magnus]: was that a compliment?

[raphael]: he's not a total idiot. He has a sense of humor, too

[tessa]: what [tessa]: did you make a joke? One someone else could recognize rather than one where you laughed at them in your head? And then he GOT IT? [tessa]: Magnus, your boy's magical, I can't wait to meet him

[magnus]: not today, sorry darling

[dot]: oh we know. Have fun

[magnus]: so much fun

[raphael]: please don't give us the details

[magnus]: just for that, you're getting pictures tonight [magnus]: so many pictures [magnus]: every possible outfit combination [magnus]: every menu item I consider for dinner [magnus]: every step in line on the way to the club

[raphael]: why are you such an asshole

[magnus]: but I'll stop once we get inside [magnus]: because I love you

[dot]: or because Pandemonium uses those weird spotlights and strobes so most pics look terrible

[cat]: oh no, it's because Magnus will be too busy admiring Alec

[raphael]: never thought I'd be thankful for Magnus' libido

[magnus]: harsh. I'll have you know he has a beautiful soul

[dot]: you're not going to a club to grind against Alec's *soul*

[cat]: apparently he can multi-task. Enjoy his soul, pretty eyes, and how he moves his hips?

[magnus]: stop objectifying my boyfriend [magnus]: or wait 'til he can hear you so I can at least enjoy him blushing

[cat]: ah, young love

[magnus]: you're the same age I am

[cat]: but I'm not in love, thank god, it sounds exhausting

[magnus]: bah humbug?

[ragnor]: exactly [ragnor]: But I also have plans, actually. Quieter ones.The observatory's doing a talk on the Lyrids, and then they're having a midnight picnic while we see how well they show up

[dot]: oooh. Can I come?

[ragnor]: if you can get here in half an hour, it's a bit of a drive to the site. Have to get far enough out of town to avoid the worst of the light pollution

[dot]: on it

[magnus]: hmmm, I have to start planning my photo montage [magnus]: you're gonna love it, Raphael [magnus]: you should get a new SD card [magnus]: so you can save them ALL

[cat]: I'm so sorry, Raphael

[magnus]: OH. IT'S ON. YOU'RE GETTING THEM TOO

[cat]: ohnomyphone'sdyingwhatwasthat

[tessa]: have fun, children. And Ragnor.

***

[maia]: Alec's here. With Magnus. Dancing. In public. Holy shit Magnus can dance. Alec's not bad, but wow. WOW.

[simon]: why are you telling me this when I can't come &see it for myself? That's just mean

[maia]: so you can tell Becky and she can give you that look that she does when she doesn't believe you? Because that look's hilarious

[simon]: you are a cruel woman

[maia]: you're just jealous Becky likes me better

[simon]: Everyone likes you better. You are objectively the best, I am proud of everyone for liking you better.

[maia]: awww. That was really sweet you big dork

[simon]: 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

[maia]: less sweet, more dork

[simon]: hey, at least I didn't try and make long-stemmed rose emojis for you [simon]: that'd be a bit much

[maia]: SPEAKING OF A BIT MUCH [maia]: I think there's glitter in Alec's hair. From Magnus' ... Everything?

[simon]: WHY DO YOU KEEP DOING THIS? I hate Pandemonium's lighting, I can't even ask you to get pics, they never come out

[maia]: well Lydia's seen Alec do this before, apparently, the dancing at least if not the glitter, and Clary's right here staring at them with me, and I can't very well tell Izzy or Jace, they're all stuck in *wait are we supposed to worry about him now?* mode and it's clearly very confusing for them that their big brother is his own person and has sex. Possibly a lot of sex? Alec and Magnus are very close together with this dancing thing. [maia]: They're really hot, babe

[simon]: I'm your last choice? AND you're telling me other boys are hot? I'm hurt

[maia]: no you're not, you know I love you (and you also know they're hot)

[simon]: I do, don't I? Love you too.

[maia]: were you agreeing with both of those?

[simon]: obviously [simon]: I can get away with that 'cause he's not actually my brother and also I know you'll never tell him I said that because you like me enough not to want me to be QUITE that mortified [simon]: aw shit, you'd totally tell Becky or Clary tho. Please don't tell Becky & Clary

[maia]: I'll consider it 😏 [maia]: Clary's probably safe. She seems really weirded out by Alec's date-behavior. Pointing out that we both already knew he was hot might make her head explode. [maia]: do you think it's because she thinks of Alec as a brother or just because he's so *Alec* iykwim?

[simon]: probably both. Clary's good at multi-tasking her emotions

[maia]: Was that a compliment or an insult?

[simon]: no idea [simon]: and Bubbie's back, gotta go. She did want to know if you're still good for Shabbat next week?

[maia]: course. Tell her I'll bring the wine

[simon]: told you everyone should like you best 😍

[maia]: 😘

***

[clary]: alinealinealinehelp in eed tot alkto you

[aline]: it's after 2 in the morning there what are you doing? Are you all right? Is someone dying? Do I need to get a plane ticket?

[clary]: SORRY. Everyone'sfine (alec's borfiiiiirnis so gorgeous and i don't even,i had to tell you because you'retheonlyone who gets it)

[aline]: alec's what? WHAT. [aline]: CLARY [aline]: CLARY WTF [aline]: I AM GOING TO CALL LUKE AND MAKE SURE NO ONE'S DYING

[aline]: clary? If you're asleep and no one's dying I'm going to kill you

[clary]: sorry, sorry. Got some water and a keyboard I candothisnow. Sort of. Sorry

[aline]: how drunk are you

[clary]: not too drunk for these conversation [clary]: thank god my phone's well trained

[aline]: thank god I woke up and had coffee already [aline]: can you start over now?

[clary]: yeah like. A week or twss ago this guy THIS GUY with the best clothes I've ever seen and eyeliner to rival Izzy's came into the store looking for a book and he said *ALEC* sent him

[aline]: what

[clary]: i KNOW. right. I did not know that was a thing for Alec. Maybe it's just Magnus is a thing for Alec? That would make more sense, I don't think he knew what he looked like at that point but MAGNUS HAD THIS LITTLE SMILE WHEN HE SAID aLEC's name and it was amazing and adorable and istg he's so beautiful i want his vests like all of them do you think if they get married I could borrow his vests?

[aline]: clary. You need to, idk. I cannot follow this story and if you don't figure it out I'm going to call you and if that doesn't help I'm going to call EVERYONE YOU ARE EVEN SORT OF RELATED TO UNTIL SOMEONE EXPLAINS

[clary]: NO you can't that's why I'm talking to you Maia went home to sle [clary]: sleep because Maia actually knows how to adult and Jace and Izzy are being like scowly because you know it's *Alec* and they're worried and Lydia is [clary]: Lydia more Alec's friend than my friend even though we are also friends and how does she make her hair stay like that do you think? It never falls out of those braids

[aline]: BREATHE

[clary]: ok

[aline]: drink some water

[clary]: ok

[aline]: try again

[clary]: so Alec has a boyfriend who he met via an accidental email message or something like in an actual freaking movie [clary]: and for their first date they came to THE HUNTER'S MOON AND SIMON'S GIG LAST WEEK

[aline]: why would anyone start with that

[clary]: and then they left early and Alec's was freshly shaved when he got to the bookstore the next *afternoon* like he had only just managed to get home and clean up before he had to show up and also he keeps smiling and I have a suspiciousness he hasn't slept back at his own place all week

[aline]: how did starting with meeting our family work, that's impossible

[clary]: I have no damn clue but we tried to tease him at dinner last week and now Maryse invited Magnus (that's the boyfriend in case I forgot that part?) to family dinner this week and apparently he said YES [clary]: IT'S BEEN A WEEK and ALEC IS BRINGING HIS OBYFRIENDTOD INNER S unday wait it's like almost three that's TOMORROW

[aline]: Alec's never invited anyone to a family anything ever. I've never even managed to figure out if he's ever gone on a date because wherever he goes it's not where any of us are. EVER.

[clary]: OH HE DATES NOW [clary]: I SAW THEM AT PANDEMONIUM TONIGHT AND I [clary]: they were *dancing* and I was maybe 4 people away and Alec didn't even notice [clary]: and Alec's my *brother* and they're boys but even I could tell they were really hot. as in people were staring hot and Alec didn't care

[aline]: holy shit

[clary]: like. I really don't want to know this about them but they may have had sex in the bathroom because let me tell you Alec was all blushing and dark eyed and hi's HAIR and you know that loose-happy-post-orgasm thing was going on with the dancing

[aline]: I don't want to know this about them or you that you would recognize that, you're twelve

[clary]: I am TWENV. I'm TWEMT fucking 21

[aline]: maybe he'd just had a drink and was enjoying a night out [aline]: ...

[clary]: yeah. Cuz that's not LESS WEIRD? Alec drinking and going out in public and not noticing someone he knows near-by? (MAIA. ME. we're not subtle) ALEC NOT NOTICING FAMILY? I HAVE NEVER. You have never. NEVER.

[aline]: this is the most disturbing conversation to be having. Especially with you

[clary]: WHY ESPECIALLY ME? You've known Izzy since she ewas actually a bb izzy and me since i was a teenager why'mI worse? [clary]: and i am not a virgin wtf aline you took me to the 18nighht at Galore togetherallthetime before you met Helen. And after you met Helen but before either of you had the balls to ask her out. Or the other her. Or you. I think I lost track of the nouns in that sentence

[aline]: drink more water

[clary]: k

[aline]: and then get some sleep

[clary]: BUT aLEC AND mAGNUS

[aline]: are adults and apparently very happy about that fact, they'll be fine

[clary]: but Izzy and Jace are being WEIRD ABOUT IT i need help

[aline]: why? How? What do you think I'm going to do from a different continent? And are you even going to remember this conversation after you get some sleep?

[clary]: that's why typing i can read it if i forgot

[aline]: uh. I think that's going to go a little differently than you expect

[clary]: oh, Simon's saved everysingle durmngdi drunk text I've ever sent him, this is way more like real words than usual

[aline]: that's terrifying I can't know that you're twelve

[clary]: stop saying that!

[aline]: you're drunk texting me about your brother's boyfriend [aline]: who you actually called both gorgeous and hot like he's a celebrity on a poster [aline]: stop acting like you're twelve

[clary]: oh [clary]: point [clary]: but

[aline]: and honestly considering Alec I think you're the one being weird [aline]: it's perfectly normal to be worried about someone doing something out of character

[clary]: ugh not you too [clary]: but the SMILES [clary]: the way they just. Everything. [clary]: I think they're soulmates

[aline]: there's no such thing

[clary]: I didn't think so either. but now?  [clary]: aw shit the tired hit I gotta go sleep [clary]: love you

[aline]: but [aline]: god damn it [aline]: I’m calling you back in six hours to wake you up and make you suffer

***

[aline]: I just had the weirdest conversation with Clary

[helen]: it's 3 in the morning there

[aline]: drunk!Clary. Not even why it was weird though. I think.

[helen]: what she's twelve she can't be drunk texting people on the other side of the planet, that's just wrong

[aline]: that's what I said!

[helen]: great minds

[aline]: hot bods

[helen]: 🥂

[aline]: 💕

[helen]: so what did drunk Clary have to say that was even weirder than the fact that drunk Clary was texting you from the other side of the planet?

[aline]: Alec brought a date to Simon's gig last week and they're going to family dinner Sunday AND they were apparently at Pandemonium last night. Alec didn't notice Clary. While he was dancing. In public. With some guy *Clary* called hot and gorgeous and beautiful.

[helen]: wtf Clary's possibly even more gay than you are. She and Alec are both solid sixes.

[aline]: I KNOW, RIGHT?

[helen]: I don't know what to do with this information

[aline]: exactly [aline]: and Clary was in all seriousness (I think) calling them soulmates and then she decided she was tired and stopped talking to me

[aline]: and it's 3am there everyone else is probably asleep  [aline]: I'm just staring at my phone. I feel like I should do something with all this? But there's nothing?

[helen]: so you had to share the WTF with me?

[aline]: obviously

[helen]: well [helen]: thanks? [helen]: but I'm at my stop so you're gonna have to figure out the WTF on your own for awhile

[aline]: but I don't wanna

[helen]: too bad

[aline]: ha. Just for that, I'm going back to bed. Blankets and pillows and that one line of sunlight that makes it through between the curtains...

[helen]: I hate you

[aline]: love you too, babe. 👋🏼 

[xocriminal-minds-imaginesxo]

Redamancy Pt. 10

A/N:The last few chapters have been going back up, thank you for sharing and loving the story! I spent a lot of time on it, it’s like my baby!

Some time had passed since Ella’s terrifying experience. There were a few nightmares here, though Emily essentially ordered her to see the bureau’s therapist. Things we’re finally beginning to get back to normal.

Luke and Ella were still spending time together. In fact, they were getting ready to head out for the evening now to go and watch a movie at Luke’s place. They had gathered up all their things and Luke reached for Ella’s hand. She tensed at his touch and he pulled away, slightly confused.

“Sorry I just… I don’t know if that’s ok. In front of the team?” Ella whispered.

“Why not they all know that we’re dating.” He replied. “I’m not going to force you to hold my hand, I’m just trying to understand.” Which she knew was true. Luke had been very understanding and so wonderful getting to know this piece of her. He hadn’t pushed or gotten frustrated, at least not that she could see.

“I just, public displays of affection really freak me out, but like… only in front of people I know.” She rambled on and he just laughed.

“Alright. Let’s go.” He gestured to the door. They said goodbye to the others in the bullpen and they were on their way. Once inside the elevator, Ella reached for his hand. Luke couldn’t help but chuckle, but gladly laced his fingers with hers.

Ella had become quite comfortable in Luke’s house. While she went to grab a sweater from his bedroom, because he kept his thermostat much lower than she preferred, he went to the kitchen to order Chinese.

“I’m not going to have any sweaters left!” He laughed, placing a kiss to the top of her head when she wrapped her arms around his waist.

“Ok but it’s friggin Antarctica in here, and besides, it smells like you.” She smiled up at him. His brown eyes were fixated on hers and it felt as if her stomach had done a summersault. “Also, I’m assuming this sweater says Lucy as in your sister?” Luke let out a chuckle, but he nodded.

“Why? Are you jealous?” He raised an eyebrow and Ella rolled her eyes.

“No, I just would’ve been a little confused as to why you would keep a sweatshirt for a softball league you weren’t in for a girl you don’t date.”

“Fair point.” A knock at the door separated them. “Do you want to eat at the island area or on the couch while we watch the movie?”

“I really shouldn’t be trusted to eat anywhere other than a table.”

Luke couldn’t help but laugh at Ella as she ate her food. He’d never seen someone get so excited about food until he saw her wiggling and dancing in her chair as she ate her Kung Pao chicken. Bopping up and down she went to take another bit but dropped it on the sweatshirt she was wearing.

“Oh…” She whined, spooning it up and popping it into her mouth. “I’m sorry I got stuff on your sweater.”

“I’ll get you a new one, toss that one in the washing machine.” Luke got up from his chair and went into the bedroom, coming back a moment later and tossing her the new one. Ella snuggled into it and smiled.

“Did you spray this with your cologne?” She bit the inside of her cheek trying to hide the smile that was threatening to spread.

“You know, it would be easier to make the food from plate to your mouth if you stopped dancing while you ate.” Luke sat back down, and Ella shrugged her shoulders.

“I just really like food. Where are the fortune cookies?” He shook his head laughing but tossed her a wrapped cookie. Taking it in her hand, she cracked it open, hid the fortune in her palm and started eating the cookie.

“What are you doing? Read your fortune.”

“You have to eat the cookie first or else it doesn’t come true.” Her voice was exacerbated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. He held his hands up in defense and grabbed the other cookie.

“Alright, I’ll try it, see what happens.”

“Everyone is an architect of his or her own fortune.” Ella read when she finished eating the cookie. “Ok well that was lame.”

“Better than mine. Do or do not, there is no try.” They laughed at the lame fortunes and tossed them with the trash. “You go pick a movie and get comfortable, I’ll take care of all this.”

Ella smiled and trotted off to the living room. Debating between a few movies she finally settled on The Avengers. She put it in the player and sprawled out on the couch. Luke came in and gave her a funny look. Though he didn’t say anything, he just ran over to the couch and dove behind her, laying down and pulling her close. She kicked and laughed loudly as he pulled her close, tickling her sides. Roxy started barking amongst all the excitement which only made Ella laugh harder.

“Stop it! Stop! Ok I give, I give!” She was twisting all around and almost went right off the edge of the couch. Luke’s strong arms grabbed her before she fell and pulled her close, their chests pressed together. She put her head to his shoulder as the giggles wound down.

They sat this way in silence, Ella fiddling with the buttons on Luke’s shirt, her heart felt as if it was skipping a beat. She had never felt this way about someone before and it made her the happiest she’d every been. Clenching her fist around the fabric of his shirt. She bit the inside of her cheek as she lifted her eyes to meet his gaze. The look in his eyes was intense, and it first it made her a little nervous, but then it made her excited.

Luke could sense her hesitation but didn’t want to push, so he waited for her to do what she wanted to do. She gently placed her fingers on his jaw, brushing her fingertips against the stubble. She inched forward, stuttering slightly in her movements. Eventually though, she made her move and softly placed her lips to his. They were soft, softer than she had imagined. He tilted slightly to the right and placed his hand to her cheek thus making the kiss sweeter, but no more urgent.

Pulling away, she chewed nervously at her lips and met his gaze again. His hand was still resting on her face, thumb softly rubbing her cheek. They smiled at each other and Ella buried her face back into Luke’s chest, cherishing this moment, making a wonderful memory.

[daxfarroh]

Chapter 3

“Ah, Rey. Thank you for joining me.”

Rey nearly laughed at the hilarity of this greeting, issued by the most magnificent woman in the galaxy. She would join General Leia Organa anywhere—in the fiercest of battles and in imminent death. Surely, she would meet her in this cramped corner of the Falcon for lunch.

“I’m sure you’re wondering what I’ve been doing here in my little office, all shut in for the past week,” Leia said, gesturing at a rather intimidating mess of maps and data pads. She sat down heavily with a cup of milk tea and a plate of rehydrated bread Rey had brought her. “Please, sit. Have some tea. Or something stronger—I don’t mind. God knows you probably need it.”

Rey collected her own cup of steaming tea from the galley just a few feet away and took a seat as Leia studied her with a furrowed brow. She looked horribly tired.

“I’m afraid I’ve neglected you, Rey. I know you must feel very alone.”

It was true that the just the thought of being so close to Leia every waking hour was one of the few pleasures of being packed into this ship with a dozen other souls, and it was true that Rey had seen much less of her than she’d hoped. When she wasn’t alone in her “office,” pacing back and forth, making calls and hovering over a holomap, her time was consumed with grave questions from Poe and others, asking about rations and plans and whether or not they were doomed.

“But I promise you you’re not alone,” Leia said now, placing a soft hand over Rey’s. “You are of great importance to the cause, Rey, and to me. I will train you as best I can—as soon as there is time. I can help you read the texts and make sense of all that dribble drabble.”

She winked and Rey grinned. Those texts had been nothing but a massive headache thus far. “I would like that very much. But I know your work here is more important.”

“Well, I can’t argue with that,” Leia responded, slumping a little in her seat to stare at her lap momentarily. “I’m afraid saving the Resistance has come down to food, water and a place to rest. We need to lick our wounds for a while. But once those needs are met, when we get a bit of time, we will rebuild. I’m sure of it.”

“I am, too,” Rey said. “Do you have a plan?”

“’Plan’ is a strong word.” Leia rose to her feet and turned on the holomap, summoning before them a hovering planet of swirling earthen colors. “I would call it a ‘proposal’—a proposal for charity which I’m going to make to an old friend. Have you ever been to Ryloth?”

Rey shook her head.

“Of course you haven’t, I’m sorry. My old brain,” Leia palmed her forehead in embarrassment. She then returned her attention to the spinning globe, moving her hand over it wistfully.

“Ryloth is a beautiful planet in the Outer Rim, inhabited by a fierce, freedom-loving race called the Twi’lek. On Ryloth, there are supporters of the Resistance, as many fear the First Order will soon cast its eye on them. And, on Ryloth, there is an abandoned shipyard from the Old Empire—one that still houses at least one viable battleship. But most importantly, my friend Yendor lives there. He’s retired and old, like me, but still respected in government. And he owes me a favor. … I believe he’s good for it, though I’ll admit it’s a longshot.”

“And if he can’t help us?” Rey asked.

“Well, then at least we’ll have a place to lay low for a few days and get our bearings. I don’t think B--,” she stopped herself, drawing a sharp breath. “I don’t think the First Order will come looking for us there. At least not for a while.”

A pang struck Rey as she wondered if she should share what she had learned last night. She was terrified to tell anyone about the Bond, but she wasn’t sure she could keep anything from Leia.  

“I could use some fresh air and a break from this tin can, couldn’t you?” Leia patted the rust-stained wall of the Falcon as if it were a living creature. “No offense,” she told the ship, her eyes wandering its dusty corners, seeing ghosts that Rey could not. “You know, I can feel him so clearly here. I keep catching myself outside the cockpit door, expecting to find him and Chewie inside, arguing. He sure did love flying this rusty bucket under the radar, where even I couldn’t find him. … Is it wrong to be jealous of a ship?”

Rey, all but speechless at this moment of intimacy, struggled to hold the stately woman’s raw gaze without betraying the chills that were overtaking her. “I miss him, too,” was all she could think to say.

“He is with Luke, in the Light.”

Leia sat down again, opposite Rey. For the first time, Rey saw the weight of age on her. It was the heaviest she’d ever seen, as if this woman was a thousand years old and had suffered the loss of a thousand loves. But, in truth, she had, Rey realized. Perhaps no one alive had witnessed more death. Now, here on this ship, who did she have? What planet did she call home? Leia Organa was, in fact, the loneliest person in the galaxy. And yet, still, she maintained this aura of purpose, of perpetual fortitude. What for? Rey wondered. How does she breathe, let alone lead us to yet another redemption?

“I’ll be joining them soon.”

The words wrenched Rey out of her own thoughts. “What? What do you mean?”

Leia sighed, taking time to choose her words and muster her token half smile that always padded the worst of news.

“Rey, after I was blasted out of the ship, I haven’t exactly been feeling my best.”

“I’m sure you haven’t. That was terrible. But you’re getting better. You’ve been getting stronger ever since, though I’m sure the food here isn’t doing you any favors,” Rey was spewing out sentences, delaying whatever was about to be said, because she knew she did not want to hear it. “But you’re doing better—”

“Rey,” Leia stopped her gently, taking her hand once more. “Perhaps twenty years ago I could have come out without a scratch, but let’s face it: I’m no spring chicken. The doctors told me, when I woke up, that my time is limited.”

“How limited?” Rey snatched her hand away, feeling cold. “How much time do you have left?”

Leia sighed again and, for once, appeared unsure, as if she was weighing all the consequences of telling her. After what felt like an eternity, she made her decision.

“Weeks. Maybe months, if I’m lucky.”

It was as if the Force was holding Rey in her seat, squeezing its ruthless fingers around her lungs and making her head spin. No, this wasn’t computing. This couldn’t be right. Not Leia. She was immortal.

“Rey?”

Suddenly, Rey’s senses flooded back to her all at once and the blood rushed to her legs, compelling her to leap to her feet and run from Leia without any explanation. When she returned, she was holding an ancient, leatherbound book the size of her own torso.

“I can’t really read it, but I’ve been studying some healing practices.” She opened the book to the marked page and pointed at the strange text. “If you help me, I can probably heal you.”

A smile lit up Leia’s face—the proudest, fondest smile Rey had ever received—but it didn’t reach the general’s sad eyes.

“I’m aware of the Jedi healing practices and, unfortunately, you can’t fix being old. Someday soon, you’ll be able to mend a bone with just a touch, but you can’t fix the damage I’ve endured. So many years of damage, Rey. So much living and suffering. It’s been one hell of a life, and I’m going to make sure I don’t waste a second of it.”

Leia smiled again as a tear slid down Rey’s cheek. There wasn’t a dry eye between them, but Leia had more to discuss.

“Enough of this depressing stuff. Let’s talk about the future.”

“The future?”

“Mhmm. You, my dear, are going to play a very important role in it. Are you ready?”  Rey nodded, though she was not ready for any kind of future without Leia.

“As you might have guessed, Poe is my heir apparent in this. I think we both know that it doesn’t really matter who I choose—it will be Poe just the same.”

Rey’s mouth formed a watery smirk at the thought of Poe, as she had recently come to know him. She liked to think of him as a friend. Their comradery had been immediate upon introduction. He liked calling her his “torture buddy,” since they had both survived an interrogation from Kylo Ren. Yet she also knew him to be a pilot who would fly through a sun if it got in his way. And he didn’t care much for taking orders.

“Poe has the potential to be a great leader,” Leia continued. “He takes leaps that others would consider suicide, which is how I’ve gotten this far. And he’s a bit insane. Which is why you must be his guiding light.”

“Me?”

“Yes, you. You are not only, well, you, Rey, but you are also the last Jedi. You represent all who came before you and carry all of them with you. When I am gone, my soul, too, will live on inside you, because mine is the soul of a Jedi. When Poe goes astray, you must bring him back, as I would. Do you think you can do that?”

Without hesitation, because it was Leia who was asking her, Rey replied, “Yes.”

“Good. Now, call me Master Leia.”

[dfroza]

A wedding miracle

when water became wine.

and God authored marriage. it originated in His eternal Heart. just as He formed the human body in His image, separated into male and female and the miracle of becoming “One” body through sex, which is why sex is actually a sacred act. its bond is something that needs to guarded, kept pure.

and even though people and earth were originally made perfect (pure) yet we were made free to choose how to act. to choose to be in God’s Love, or not. and since the rebellion of sin brought a curse to this world, the Lord came to restore it all in His own way, in His own timing.

and repentance on our part is an ongoing treasure throughout the course of life in humility and brokenness, in reverence, and there is even joy contained in this. because of the pure acceptance of Love despite who we truly are.

(absolute grace)

Today’s reading in the Bible is the 2nd chapter of the book of John that documents Hebraic History and the way the Lord came to earth to fulfill the Hebrew Scriptures:

[John 2]

Three days later, they all went to celebrate a wedding feast in Cana of Galilee. Mary, the mother of Jesus, was invited together with Him and His disciples. While they were celebrating, the wine ran out; and Jesus’ mother hurried over to her son.

Mary: The host stands on the brink of embarrassment; there are many guests, and there is no more wine.

Jesus: Dear woman, is it our problem they miscalculated when buying wine and inviting guests? My time has not arrived.

But she turned to the servants.

Mary: Do whatever my son tells you.

In that area were six massive stone water pots that could each hold 20 to 30 gallons. They were typically used for Jewish purification rites. Jesus’ instructions were clear:

Jesus: Fill each water pot with water until it’s ready to spill over the top; then fill a cup, and deliver it to the headwaiter.

They did exactly as they were instructed. After tasting the water that had become wine, the headwaiter couldn’t figure out where such wine came from (even though the servants knew), and he called over the bridegroom in amazement.

Headwaiter: This wine is delectable. Why would you save the most exquisite fruit of the vine? A host would generally serve the good wine first and, when his inebriated guests don’t notice or care, he would serve the inferior wine. You have held back the best for last.

Jesus performed this miracle, the first of His signs, in Cana of Galilee. They did not know how this happened; but when the disciples and the servants witnessed this miracle, their faith blossomed.

Jesus then gathered His clan—His family members and disciples—for a journey to Capernaum where they lingered several days. The time was near to celebrate the Passover, the festival commemorating when God rescued His children from slavery in Egypt, so Jesus went to Jerusalem for the celebration. Upon arriving, He entered the temple to worship. But the porches and colonnades were filled with merchants selling sacrificial animals (such as doves, oxen, and sheep) and exchanging money. Jesus fashioned a whip of cords and used it with skill driving out animals; He scattered the money and overturned the tables, emptying profiteers from the house of God. There were dove merchants still standing around, and Jesus reprimanded them.

Jesus: What are you still doing here? Get all your stuff, and haul it out of here! Stop making My Father’s house a place for your own profit!

The disciples were astounded, but they remembered that the Hebrew Scriptures said, “Jealous devotion for God’s house consumes me.” Some of the Jews cried out to Him in unison.

Jews: Who gave You the right to shut us down? If it is God, then show us a sign.

Jesus: You want a sign? Here it is. Destroy this temple, and I will rebuild it in 3 days.

Jews: Three days? This temple took more than 46 years to complete. You think You can replicate that feat in 3 days?

The true temple was His body. His disciples remembered this bold prediction after He was resurrected. Because of this knowledge, their faith in the Hebrew Scriptures and in Jesus’ teachings grew.

During the Passover feast in Jerusalem, the crowds were watching Jesus closely; and many began to believe in Him because of the signs He was doing. But Jesus saw through to the heart of humankind, and He chose not to give them what they requested. He didn’t need anyone to prove to Him the character of humanity. He knew what man was made of.

The Book of John, Chapter 2 (The Voice)

Today’s paired chapter of the Testaments is the 23rd chapter of Joshua where Joshua instructed the Israelites to remain faithful to God and not fall away into idolatry by turning to the false gods that the nations around them were worshiping. this world is full of “religious” thought, of different paths, yet the grace of the Son is the True illumination that leads the eternal heart “Home”

[Joshua’s Charge]

A long time later, after God had given Israel rest from all their surrounding enemies, and Joshua was a venerable old man, Joshua called all Israel together—elders, chiefs, judges, and officers. Then he spoke to them:

“I’m an old man. I’ve lived a long time. You have seen everything that God has done to these nations because of you. He did it because he’s God, your God. He fought for you.

“Stay alert: I have assigned to you by lot these nations that remain as an inheritance to your tribes—these in addition to the nations I have already cut down—from the Jordan to the Great Sea in the west. God, your God, will drive them out of your path until there’s nothing left of them and you’ll take over their land just as God, your God, promised you.

“Now, stay strong and steady. Obediently do everything written in the Book of The Revelation of Moses—don’t miss a detail. Don’t get mixed up with the nations that are still around. Don’t so much as speak the names of their gods or swear by them. And by all means don’t worship or pray to them. Hold tight to God, your God, just as you’ve done up to now.

“God has driven out superpower nations before you. And up to now, no one has been able to stand up to you. Think of it—one of you, single-handedly, putting a thousand on the run! Because God is God, your God. Because he fights for you, just as he promised you.

“Now, vigilantly guard your souls: Love God, your God. Because if you wander off and start taking up with these remaining nations still among you (intermarry, say, and have other dealings with them), know for certain that God, your God, will not get rid of these nations for you. They’ll be nothing but trouble to you—horsewhips on your backs and sand in your eyes—until you’re the ones who will be driven out of this good land that God, your God, has given you.

“As you can see, I’m about to go the way we all end up going. Know this with all your heart, with everything in you, that not one detail has failed of all the good things God, your God, promised you. It has all happened. Nothing’s left undone—not so much as a word.

“But just as sure as everything good that God, your God, has promised has come true, so also God will bring to pass every bad thing until there’s nothing left of you in this good land that God has given you. If you leave the path of the Covenant of God, your God, that he commanded you, go off and serve and worship other gods, God’s anger will blaze out against you. In no time at all there’ll be nothing left of you, no sign that you’ve ever been in this good land he gave you.”

The Book of Joshua, Chapter 23 (The Message)

my personal reading of the Scriptures for monday, August 24 of 2020 with a paired chapter from each Testament along with Today’s Psalms and Proverbs

Today’s message by the ICR:

August 24, 2020

The Great Divider

“Suppose ye that I am come to give peace on earth? I tell you, Nay; but rather division.” (Luke 12:51)

From the very beginning, God has been a great divider. On the first day of creation, “God divided the light from the darkness”; on the second day, He “divided the waters which were under the firmament from the waters which were above the firmament” (Genesis 1:4, 7). When God first created humans, they walked together in sweet fellowship, but then sin came in and made a great division between humans and God. Nevertheless, “when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son” (Romans 5:10).

The price has been paid for full reconciliation with our Creator, but “men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil” (John 3:19), so Christ Himself is now the One who divides. “He that believeth on the Son hath everlasting life: and he that believeth not the Son shall not see life; but the wrath of God abideth on him” (John 3:36).

Jesus Christ divides all history and all chronology. Things either happened “Before Christ” (BC) or “in the Year of our Lord” (AD). People are either under the Old Covenant or the New Covenant. Most of all, He divides humanity. “There was a division among the people because of him” (John 7:43; see also John 9:16; 10:19). These divisions because of Him can cut very deep. “The father shall be divided against the son, and the son against the father; the mother against the daughter, and the daughter against the mother” (Luke 12:53).

Finally, when He comes to judge all nations, “he shall separate them one from another, as a shepherd divideth his sheep from the goats:…And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal” (Matthew 25:32, 46). The division is life or death, light or darkness, heaven or hell, Christ or antichrist—and the choice is ours! HMM

[wolfpawn]

I Hate You, I Love You, Chapter 39

Chapter Summary -   Ben tries to eavesdrop on the women before Tom admits to his worries and concerns for his relationship.

Previous Chapter

Rating - Mature (some chapters contain smut)

Triggers - references to Tom Hiddleston’s work with the #MeToo Movement. That chapter will be tagged accordingly.

authors Note - I have been working on this for the last 3 years, it is currently 180+ chapters long.  This will be updated daily, so long as I can get time to do so, obviously.

tags: @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog  @jessibelle-nerdy-mum @nonsensicalobsessions @damalseer @hiddlesbitch1 @winterisakiller @fairlightswiftly @salempoe @lys-syl @youcantcatchafallingstar

If you wish to be tagged, please let me know.

“They seem to get on well.” Ben beamed, eavesdropping from the kitchen.

“Seriously, I hope they open that door and it hits you in the head. Stop listening.”

“No, I want to know what they are saying, why are they talking in the hall.”

“I neither know or care why ” Tom stated. “I am just glad they are getting on well.”

“Sophie feels like she needs to take her under her wing, she feels sorry for her that she was thrown to the wolves like she was that time at your dinner out, but she took it well.”

“She’s not the kind to say anything if she isn’t.” Tom sighed, causing Ben to frown. “I think she thinks she is overweight.”

“What? She is about a size ten at most.”

“Eight to ten, pending the make. But she is starting to look at food as though not certain if she should eat it, and she commented earlier about being called ‘wholesome’ by some papers.”

“Wholesome doesn’t imply fat, though, does it?”

“To us no, to women; I don’t know, I mean, they are all being told they are fat all the time.” Tom sighed.

“But it means down to earth, the whole package, the girl next door sort of thing. So you think she’s starving herself?”

“She said it is her new work schedule, I just…I love her, and I want to be with her, but if she is becoming unhappy in herself because of me, it is doing more harm than good throwing all of this at her, I cannot expect her to be okay with my life if she is not happy with herself because of it.”

“You need to talk about this with her, she needs to hear this from you, and for you to see what is going on with her,” Ben stated clearly.

“I’m scared it means losing her, I just got her.”

“I cannot believe it took you this long to get your shit together.” Ben shook his head.

“Me neither, she admitted today she has felt this way for years, years Ben, we could be like you and Sophie now if I took my head out of my ass.”

“You think she’s ‘it’ for you, the one you want it all with?” Ben asked curiously.

“I think she is the closest I have been to it. I am not saying that as though I am settling, or like it is the only viable option, but I always wanted a family of my own, I wanted a happy home, but never thought of who with, but now, all I think about is how long is it appropriate to wait for everything with her, I see it all with her, I never did with anyone else, they were all just a bit of fun, mutually understood, well since Susannah, but I mean, we were naive then.”

“Does she know you feel like this?”

“Are you kidding me, I can’t say anything like this to her yet, she would swim back to Ireland if I said I wanted to have with her what you have with Sophie this early.” Tom scoffed.

“You’ll need to have that talk someday.”

“Someday I can handle.”

“But for now, the whole other thing needs to be discussed,” Ben ordered. “Though she seemed to eat well at dinner.”

“Yeah, she did. Am I coming across as being paranoid and am I going to scare her off by mentioning it?”

“You are nowhere near as confident as you imply you are in public, you know that?” Ben shook his head.

“When it comes to her, no. I am scared of losing her to something stupid, I mean, if we cannot make this work, if there are too many things between us on a personal level, I would have to get over that, I would be gutted, but I would not want to see her compromise herself for this, but if I was to lose her for something stupid, some simple miscommunication, that would kill me.” Tom explained.

“Good, now tell her that,” Ben stated.

Tom nodded. “I will.”

“Before you leave.”

“What if she decides while I’m gone that I am a controlling jerk.”

“Her loss then, because you’re just concerned, not controlling, you are not forcing her to eat, just asking if she is alright if she is feeling pressurised. But she won’t go, she is smarter than that.”

“What if I’m the reason she is like that, that Paul guy seemed to like how she looked and she did not seem to think to change herself, but I…”

“Your last fling was with a woman that only feeds by sucking the life out of people through terrible music and singing.” Tom gave him a glare. “We went to dinner and she ate a starter salad as a main course, and don’t say it’s because she’s a vegetarian, I know vegetarians, and they eat a hell of a lot more than that, so it’s not that she’s a vegetarian.”

“I am sure it is some sort of diet.” Tom dismissed. “But Elle doesn’t need any of that.”

“Yes, I can see by the look on your face you think that,” Ben grinned knowingly. “I thought you dealt with that before we came?”

“I may need to deal with it again when we go to bed.” He winked.

“Fuck sake man, you’re in your mid-thirties, and you’re like a teenager.” Ben shook his head. “What are you taking?”

“I don’t need to take anything; I have a gorgeous girlfriend in her late twenties.”

“Yeah, yeah, you and your twenty-something-year-olds.”

“You’re jealous.”

“Not really, I have a gorgeous wife that I adore, who is smart and makes me happy, a great son, and another baby on the way. I rather it to emotionless thrills if I’m honest, it’s everything I have always wanted.”

“How did you know you’re ready for all of that?” Tom asked seriously.

“Fuck I wasn’t ready, I thought I was, but when the test told us we were going to be parents, that all went out the window, but I could never want it any other way.”

“I am so envious of you.” Ben scoffed. “No, seriously, I am. I spent so long chasing everything, terrified of missing anything, what if I am after missing the most important thing?”

“It’s not too late, I am four years older than you, you have time.”

“But is Elle ready for that, she is just starting out in her job.”

“I can tell you here and now Tom, she is not ready for kids today, but that does not mean she won’t be in the future, like I said, talk to her.” Tom sighed in resignation. “Has your mum said anymore?”

“No, I haven’t had the balls to face her.”

“How was she, after the initial shock?”

“Good, I mean, she seems happy with it, or at least, I think she is. I have no idea if I’m honest.”

“You look happier this time Tom, more yourself, she is a far better option for you.” Ben smiled fondly. “She is amazing, fun, smart, understanding, hardworking…”

“Give Taylor her due, she was hardworking too.”

“Yes, it takes considerable work to be that spiteful and hateful to people.” Ben nodded. “I have nothing nice to say about her Tom, and to expect me to be nice is bollix, she tried to pin her shit on Sophie and was nothing but rude to her.”

“I really fucked up there.”

“You still have your friends and you are out of it now, glass half full, mate.”

“But it could have cost me everything, for a while, I thought it did; there were a few weeks there where I swear, I thought I was relegated to shitty Rom-Coms.”

“Well, your actions…you looked like you were having a crisis.” Ben shrugged.

Mac rose and stretched before going to Tom, who scratched his ear as the dog lay his head on his lap. “I did, I just…felt so alone, it seemed the right idea at the time.”

“Understandable, but you’re doing fine now, work is going okay, your fans are as mad about you as ever and you have Danielle.”

“Will they like her?”

“You know there are some that won’t, they will hate her no matter what she does or is, but overall, honestly I think they will. She will be adored for being normal, everything but the tabloids will obsess with how she is the ‘girl next door’.”

“And the tabloids?” Tom asked though he knew the response already.

“They will do everything from saying she is brainwashing you to calling you gay and her being your cover.” Ben shrugged. “What did Luke say?”

“To ready her, to get her to block certain websites and he will do everything he can to help look after her, but to say nothing.”

“She seems to do that as is.”

“Except for when she met Taylor, if that was caught on camera, you know…”

“She would manipulate it around.” Ben nodded. “It’s her MO.”

Tom sighed and rubbed his hands over his face. “Why did I…”

“Don’t, you will get nowhere beating yourself up. Come on, I think the women will be wondering where we are.” He encouraged. “Danielle is strong enough for all this, you can usually tell who is and who isn’t.”

*

Elle and Sophie had made their way upstairs and were busy talking about the latter’s ideas for the logistics of Christopher and the new baby and having two little nurseries.

“If it’s another boy they probably can share for a while, but if it is waking at three am for a feed, I doubt you want to have himself up as well,” Danielle commented.

“No, separate rooms,” Benedict stated as he and Tom walked in. “I am not having Kit dictating nappy changings in the middle of the night and being as cranky as hell the next day.”

“Because of course, you will be the one that did all the hard work.” Sophie scoffed.

Elle edged towards the door, “I am not getting in the way for this.”

“I think I’ll join you.” Tom gently made his way out also. “See you two in the morning, don’t kill each other.” He joked as he did so. When he made his way into the hallway, to the sound of Sophie threatening Ben’s manhood, there was no sign of Danielle, assuming she had gone to her room, he went to the door and knocked.

She came out, thinking it was Sophie asking for something, possibly even how to drag dead weight, so when she saw Tom on the other side, she frowned. “What…?”

“Would it possible for me to stay over also?” he asked, giving her his best puppy dog eyes.

“You knocked?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“I didn’t want to assume…” he began, but she pulled him in and closed the door behind him, causing him to chuckle. “Elle,” there was a fondness in his voice, not born of lust or want, but of true feelings. “I…” he kissed her chastely. “I love you.” He smiled timidly, knowing that it was very early to say it, but her sleepy grumbles that morning had made her think he was not as serious as her regarding everything. “I adore you.”

She kissed him back, smiling widely at the declaration, “What a coincidence, Mr Hiddleston, for the feeling is mutual.”

“The food was great, the evening was great, I…I am so glad we could do this.”

“It’s all so very grown-up and serious,” Elle joked. “But I loved it, I loved being able to talk to people who actually understand all of this, who…” her hands moved around as she talked. “I can’t even think of the best way to say it.”

“I understand, and I am so happy you got to speak with Sophie.”

“She was able to understand stuff I can’t explain.” She stated.

Tom frowned. “You can always talk to me.”

Danielle nodded. “I know, but you cannot understand the perspective as well as she can. You can understand the scrutiny, the limelight, but not the exact feeling being the ‘plus one’ in that situation, you are the star, not the tagalong.”

“You’re not a…” Tom stopped himself, seeing she wanted to continue to explain herself.

“I am, and I understand that, so does Sophie, you and Ben are great, you make sure we feel secure, but you can’t really get it,” Tom’s brows furrowed. “I love you, Tom; but there is a lot involved in loving you too. It includes a lot of other people involving themselves, and I need to thicken my skin, I know that but I need to have a person that understands that too; so thank you.” Tom cocked his head slightly. “Having Ben and Sophie come here, I don’t feel so scared or stressed about it now, I feel like it’s nowhere near as difficult as my mind was telling me it was.” As she leant up to kiss him, Tom pressed his lips down to hers, pulling her to the bed. “But what about our guests,” she whispered.

“I don’t give a fuck, I love you, I hate being away from you, and I want you to remember me for the next few weeks.”

She giggled at his words. “It is three weeks, Tom. Not six months, we will be fine.”

“Don’t care, still going to fuck you.” He commented back, his lips still pressed to hers.

“You are insatiable.”

“You love it.” He grinned, starting to unbutton and unzip her jeans.

[swfanficbyjz]

SW AU - Fate of the Master Chapter 14

<- Previous Chapter

"Why are you taking me back to Tatooine? Don't you want me?" Luke asked Anakin just as the ship fell out of hyperspace.

"Of course I do, son. But your aunt and uncle have cared for you your whole life, and I want to make sure they're okay with you staying with me."

"Why wouldn't they be? You are my father."

Anakin sighed. "Yes Luke, I am. But you need to understand something... for years I've been on a very destructive path. I lost sight of everything good and important. I've been struggling to find my place in this galaxy again. I know what I should do, I know who I should be, but I'm not sure it's who I am. It's not fair to you, or your sister, when you already had loving homes, to have to follow me around while I figure it out."

"We'll help you find it. Fair or not, we should be with you! We're a family!" Luke begged him.

"Are we?" Anakin responded a little colder than he meant to. "I only found out I had kids two weeks ago. I'm not sure I'm ready to be a father. I'm not sure I was ever ready to be one." He regretted the last sentence the moment it left his lips. Luke looked up at him hurt.

He looked as if he was about to say something, but instead turned away. Luke was a good kid. And so was Leia. If he'd had any idea back when Padmé was pregnant, they'd turn out like this, maybe he wouldn't have been so scared. But there were two things that were bothering him about it. The first, was that as soon as he'd started having dreams about Padmé dying in childbirth, he'd stopped caring about the baby. He'd only been afraid to lose her. The second, was that he strongly suspected the reason both his children had turned out alright was because he hadn't been in their life. Padmé would have made an incredible mother, but every good thing she would have done for them, he likely would have ruined. Not intentionally of course, but he knew nothing at all about raising kids, he'd probably scar them for life. No, it would be better for both of them if he wasn't there.

Raising Ahsoka had been hard enough. She turned out just fine, but he didn't credit himself for that one bit. Maybe for her combat skills, but emotionally? Yeah, he had nothing to do with that. Where are you, Snips? Can't you see I need you here?

Returning Luke to Owen and Beru could have gone a lot better. They were understandably shocked that he was alive. Angry that Luke had run off and positively livid that Luke had been given some training in the force. They'd called Anakin irresponsible and told him that father or not, he had no right to come around there filling their nephew with silly dreams. And then they'd slammed the door in his face. He definitely deserved it.

He had felt their fear of course, he understood what they were scared of. They were afraid Luke would turn out like him. He was afraid of that too, honestly. He sat cross legged in front of his mother's grave.

"I failed you, mom." He wept. Where had things gone so wrong? He'd never asked to be some Chosen One. He'd only ever wanted to be more than a slave. "I miss you so much! I wish you were here right now. I wish you could tell me what to do. I'm so lost!"

He let himself cry for awhile. When the tears finally stopped, he got up and walked slowly back to the ship.

---

It started several days after his father dumped him back on Tatooine. He couldn’t believe after so many years of wishing to know his parents that miraculously one of them appeared in his life still alive. Not only that, his father had been a Jedi! One of the most mysterious and yet legendary fighters in the galaxy. He’d heard dozens of stories about their exploits during the Clone Wars whenever they went to town. He longed to know one, to BE one. How amazing would that be? Running off on an adventure, saving planets from tyranny and oppression and being a famous hero? It would be a far better life than a moisture farmer! Luke kicked the edge of the table out of frustration and then yelped in pain.

“Have you finished your chores?” his aunt yelled from the next room.

“Yes, Aunt Beru.” He replied. “Can I go to Tosche Station now?”

“Go check with your uncle and see if he needs help first.” She should have just told him no; his uncle could always find something for him to do. He mumbled under his breath wishing he was brave enough to just run away. Anything would be better than being stuck here. He wished Leia was with him. At least he wouldn’t be so bored.

Thinking about his twin sister made his heart ache. Ever since he’d met her that day on Alderaan, he’d hardly wanted to leave her side. He should have taken Senator Organa’s offer to stay there with them. But instead he’d foolishly thought that if he’d stayed with his father, he’d get to learn all about the Jedi and how to be one. Then he could go back to Leia and show her everything he’d learned. She’d be impressed. At least he hoped she’d be more impressed than the first time.

As he headed out into the sweltering heat, his eyes fell on the locked metal box in the corner where his uncle had secured his lightsaber. They’d both forbidden him to train further. They had blamed the Jedi for the war. And then they’d remind him what happened to his father and why he was so much better off not messing with the black arts. That’s not how he saw it though. There was nothing bad about the things he’d been taught. Every time he’d reached into the force as Ahsoka had taught him, he felt a sense of peace. He felt strong and calm and brave. He felt powerful. What was so wrong with that?

In spite of his aunt and uncle’s warnings, he still practiced using the force. Every night, he’d wait until they went to bed and then he’d sneak outside and practice moving things around with his mind. It was a freeing experience.

If only it could do my chores for me, he thought to himself as he met up with his uncle.

"Uncle Owen," Luke started, "I finished my chores, can I go to Tosche Station and see my friends?" It was worth a shot.

"Give me a hand with this control panel first, it's acting all funny. Next time the Jawas come by we need to get a repair droid." His uncle didn't look up as he answered. At least he didn't see the flash of frustration that Luke felt in response.

Sometimes he felt like a slave. He rarely ever got to do anything fun. The other boys his age were able to go spend afternoons in Anchorhead, shooting the breeze, pranking old Joe and having a good time. He was the misfit of the group, but they tolerated him when he could actually hang out. A couple of the older boys liked to dare him to pull stunts on some of the shopkeepers, but he was good at that, so they'd let him hang out with them. Just imagine if they could see me use the force or swing a lightsaber!

He was jealous of his sister. She got the far better end of the deal. She got to grow up as a princess. Trouble free- easy life. It just wasn't fair! Wait until the boys hear about her. Maybe then they wouldn't tease him so much.

Several hours passed as his uncle kept finding things for him to do. This was always what happened. Whenever he complained they'd just tell him there was too much to do and they needed his help. After a long day working under the two suns, he got to go inside for dinner.

He didn't speak to them while they ate. They didn't really care to hear what he wanted to do. Uncle Owen just went on about the days drudging work. They didn't pay any attention to him.

That night he waited in bed until his aunt and uncle finally fell asleep and then he went outside to practice the force techniques like Ahsoka had taught him. He wished she was here. Maybe she would have talked his dad into not bringing him back. All he'd told Luke about her sudden disappearance was that she'd had a mission to attend to. But where? What? Why did she have to go alone?

He liked Ahsoka a lot. He didn't really know why. She just had something about her. She was strong, confident, and powerful. But also soft, sweet and understanding. She was very pretty too, for an alien. He hadn't met many Togruta. They didn't come around slum worlds like this very often. It hadn't really been clear how she knew his father, and he'd never really had a chance to ask her. He could tell they were close friends, maybe more.

He stacked a few rocks with the force and then felt rather than heard a disturbance in the distance. He ran quietly back inside to grab his monoculars and his rifle. He could just barely make out a flurry of activity at their neighbors, the Darklighter's homestead. He wasn't exactly sure what was happening but it was something bad. He debated waking his aunt and uncle. If it was a raid led by the sand people, they could head their way next. He wished he had the lightsaber right now instead of the rifle. Maybe it would be enough to scare them off.

He watched through the monoculars for awhile, but couldn't really make out anything distinct. He suddenly realized they'd turned and were heading their way. Stang!

He ran inside and roused his aunt and uncle. They weren't real happy about being woken but they both grabbed their own rifles and ran outside. At least a dozen raiders were on the horizon. His uncle told him to go activate the signal horn while they locked down the farm.

Luke raced across the field to the far moisture tower to sound the siren. Nothing happened. He fiddled with wires for awhile, but he couldn't figure out what was wrong with it. He heard his uncle shouting and abandoned the alarm to help them scare off the Tuskens. By the time he got back to the house, there were three dead raiders near the entry. Two were in a fire fight with his aunt Beru and a group were fighting with his uncle. She yelled at him to help. He knelt down behind a pile of tools and took aim. He hit one of the ones shooting at his aunt, but missed the second one. Having given himself away, several turned to converge on him. He turned to run away from the house to see if he could lose them behind the barn. He could hear them chasing him. Crouching, hidden from their view, he used the force to send rocks flying at them. They started hollering as they got pelted by the stones and ran off into the desert. Then he heard his aunt yell for him. She sounded frantic.

He raced back to the hut. She'd managed to kill the other one that had been shooting at her, but there were still five of them leaning over his uncle. He could just make him out through their legs. He wasn't moving. He ran inside ignoring his aunt's pleas to get to him. He shot the lock on the metal box and grabbed his lightsaber. Then he raced back outside, dropped his rifle and ignited it. All five turned and looked at him. One tried to fire a shot that he deflected back at it, then he slashed his way at them cutting an arm and then the head off one and slicing one of them in half. The other three took off running into the night.

He felt power flowing through him. He was buzzed on adrenaline. He wanted to chase after them and strike them down. But he was able to come back to his senses when he heard his aunt scream next to him. He shut the lightsaber down and stowed it in his shirt. Then he gasped as he finally looked down at his uncle. He was in pretty bad shape. Several blaster wounds in his night shirt, blood gushing out of them and a couple slashes in his left leg. It looked almost as though the sand people had been trying to saw off his leg. His uncle was still alive, but just barely. His aunt went to work on stopping his bleeding and had him go fetch the med kit.

"Why didn't you sound the siren?" His uncle asked angrily when he finally came to.

"I tried! It was broken!" Luke complained.

"It was working just the other day!"

"It looked like some wires had been cut. I didn't have time to look closely."

"What are you doing with that?" Uncle lars demanded. Pointing to Luke's chest where the end of the lightsaber was sticking out of his pocket. "I thought I forbid you to use it!"

"I just saved your life with it! But instead of a thank you, you're yelling at me!" Luke whined, anger rising in his voice. This was just great. He couldn't do anything right! It wasn't his fault the siren was broken. And rather than be grateful that his nephew just used a powerful weapon to scare off the Tuskens, his uncle was acting as though everything was his fault.

"Give it to me, now!" His uncle yelled. "I should've destroyed the damn thing when I had the chance!"

Now it was Luke's turn to yell. "No!" And before either of them could stop him, he jumped into his landspeeder and took off toward Anchorhead, fuming. How dare they? It had been his father's! It was his now! It was his ticket to a better life and they wanted to destroy it! If they really cared about him, they wouldn't try to take it from him.

---

Anakin entered the unresponsive ship tentatively. He hadn't been able to determine much from the scans. Artoo beeped worriedly behind him. "Don't worry, buddy." He patted the droid. "Stay close to me."

The ship had sent out a distress signal just before going quiet. His awareness tickled like it could be a trap, but he met no resistance as he made his way through the ship. He felt something familiar aboard, but he couldn't make out what it was.

He bumped into a couple disabled security droids, but otherwise came up empty. "Artoo, plug into the ship and see what you can find out." The astromech beeped obediently and was soon slicing the ship's computer for any relevant information. It then turned and projected security footage of someone on the bridge with their head under a panel likely trying to repair it. They appeared to be the only person on board.

Well then, this should be an easy conversation. They made their way to the bridge and could hear music playing from inside. Whoever this was, clearly wasn't afraid of pirates. That put him a little on edge. He nodded to his droid and the door opened. He told Artoo to keep watch and then went inside.

The person repairing the ship didn't notice his entrance. There were a couple more deactivated security droids on the bridge.

"Are you Visago?" Anakin asked loud enough to be heard over the radio.

"Ouch!" Came a familiar voice after a clunking sound. Oh man... seriously? A male Weequay sat up and shut off the radio. "Oh hello! Did you get my message and decide to come rescue me?"

"Hondo Ohnaka..." Anakin replied feeling his lips curl a little with distaste. How did he keep running into this stinking pirate?

"Do I know you?" The pirate asked, "wait, don't tell me I owe you money!" He said reaching for a little device hooked to his belt.

"No, no." Anakin said, figuring that must remotely activate the droids. "Where's Visago? He sent a distress call, this is his ship."

"Oh well..." Hondo chuckled. "It WAS his ship but then he bet it and lost it in a friendly game of holochess. It's mine now, but I can't get the hyperdrive working."

"I'm sure my droid can fix that, but how do I know you're telling the truth?" Anakin didn't trust the Weequay any farther than he could smell him.

"Why would I lie?" The pirate grinned, showing rows of rotting teeth and gold fillings.

"Oh I don't know," Anakin rolled his eyes, "because you're good at that."

"I tell you what," his tone switched to business. "Help me fix my hyperdrive, so I can deliver my goods, and I'll split the reward right down the middle, say... sixty/thirty."

Anakin couldn't help the bemused smile that crossed his lips. But money did sound nice. Maybe then he'd be able to find a place for Luke and Leia to live with him. If they'd want to anyways. "And the other ten percent?"

"Oh, you'll want me to spend that on expenses. Food, fuel, drinks! That kind of thing. "Do we have a deal?" Hondo asked, sticking out his hand for Anakin to shake.

"Deal," Anakin said, shaking his hand. He slipped the remote activator from Hondo's belt into his pocket. Just in case the pirate tried double crossing him.

"Say, I do know you! My old Jedi friend! How are you buddy?"

"All the Jedi are dead." Anakin replied simply.

"Well in that case, welcome! I always wanted a ghost on my crew!" Hondo smiled widely without skipping a beat. "Now have your droid do its thing!"

"Where is the rest of your crew, anyways?" Anakin asked after directing Artoo to get to work and leaned back against the doorframe. Well there's a first time for everything. Once a Jedi, then a Sith and now a pirate. Everyone would be so proud. As long as Hondo behaved himself, it might not be such a bad gig. Who knows?

"Oh they got cold feet. The Empire scared off the ones they didn't kill. Took away everything from me; destroyed my home, all my ships, now I do odd jobs as they come up. It's not so bad, not always as much fun now though." Ohnaka replied casually as if it really didn't make any difference to him where he was. Anakin felt the guilt creep up his throat. How could he feel pity for this pirate after everything he'd put him through? Truth be told, he knew why he felt it. It was the same thing that held him back.

Ever since Ahsoka had pulled him out of the dark side, he'd felt like he had to stand trial a dozen times. Everyone had been nice about it, but the guilt ate away at him. Sometimes he wished they weren't being nice. He'd rather them be angry at him. Then at least he'd feel like he was getting what he deserved. He wanted to make it up to them. All of them, even this trouble of a pirate in front of him. But he couldn't undo what had been done; what he'd let happen.

He'd loved the thrill of war. The thrill of victory, especially in the face of bad odds. It had been like a game to him. Him and Ahsoka keeping a battle droid kill count as if there was some grand prize to be won. He was a man of action, always on the move. Even in the face of death he'd never been able to fully see it as a bad thing. The way it felt to reach into the force, to be hyper aware of every movement and sound around him, to feel these people he loved on all sides. Then to spring into action and strike down the enemy, to wield his lightsaber with deadly accuracy. To hear the grateful cheers from the people they rescued. It only served to fuel his need to go on. Strategy on the battle cruisers and in the ship, were like puzzles to him. He loved the challenge of breaking through blockades and defenses. Of pushing those around him and the ships to their limits. Of seeing how they rose above. But he couldn't ignore the price in blood that had been paid.

He had been known as the hero with no fear. The poster boy of the war. And he had thrived on it. Not because he needed people to cheer for him, but rather because it gave him purpose... meaning. But as it dragged on, he stopped enjoying it as much. He'd found himself missing Padmé more and more. Every mission walked him closer to the edge without quite pushing him in. They stopped being fun, stopped fueling his fire. Everywhere he looked, he saw failure. Failure to succeed, failure to take action, failure to end the conflict.

What was his life now? There was still a need for people to fight. There'd always be a need for that. Even when the empire was overturned and the republic could resume. But he didn't want to fight anymore. He didn't want to rush into another war. He didn't want to put his desires aside for something bigger; or be ordered around. He wanted to make his own choices. For the good of himself, and his family. He didn’t want to think about the entire galaxy anymore. He wanted to be selfish.

He wanted to be what no one really wanted him to be. What no one had ever let him be... except for Ahsoka. He wanted to be himself. I miss you, Snips...

Maybe being a pirate wasn't that far from his dream.

–-

Luke was going to stop at the Anchorhead cantina, but he was still so angry he just kept going. It was late, his aunt and uncle would be furious. He couldn't believe he'd just taken off like that especially after his uncle could have died. But as the fire continued to burn in his blood, he couldn't come up with an apology. He was mad at them for not caring about his own desires and dreams. He was mad at his father for being alive and giving him a taste of a better life and then dropping him back here. He was mad at his mother for dying. He was mad at Leia for having an easier life in a nicer place. And he was mad at Ahsoka for leaving without an explanation. He was mad at everyone.

It was so unfair! He'd always tried to be a good person. He believed in it. He knew it was what his parents would have wanted. But did being a good person mean getting screwed over all the time? Because if it did, maybe he didn't want to be one anymore.

He made it to Mos Eisley in the early hours of the morning. He didn't know what he was hoping to find there. A friend? A job? A ride off this dung heap? The only thing he was certain of now was no matter what, he wasn't going back.

He wandered the streets until the suns rose and the markets started opening. He found a fellow who bought his landspeeder for a small pile of credits. It wasn't enough to buy a ship, but it might be enough to buy a ride on one. He went from cantina to cantina, but all the pilots he talked to quoted prices beyond his budget. He'd tried to make some deals, but he'd never been good at negotiating.

The afternoon was turning into evening and he'd struck out every time.

He saw a junker of a ship land in the space port. Maybe he could get a ride on that thing. He headed that direction hoping to cut off the pilot and make a deal. He watched a boy not that much older than him disembark the vessel, followed by a Wookiee... but before he could get to them, a group of bounty hunters confronted them. He recognized Greedo, the local thug that worked for Jabba.

"He'll get his money," he heard the boy say. "I was on my way there right now."

The Wookiee growled something. And the boy whipped out two blasters and started a fire fight with the bounty hunters. He hit Greedo in the leg, and killed two others. The Wookiee hit another one with an explosive shot from his crossbow. Who were these guys? The boy flipped Greedo's blaster in the air and holstered it. Then walked away leaving the injured bounty hunter yelling after him. Something about the Hutt punishing them for killing his bounty hunters.

The odd duo ignored the threats. Luke didn't think they were the kind of people to strike a deal with, but then again... maybe they were just what he was looking for. They certainly knew a little something about adventure. He decided to follow them.

They stopped in the cantina for a couple drinks, and then they hopped a barge headed to Jabba's palace. Luke followed at a distance trying not to draw attention.

Next Chapter ->