#mask on' i will wear one to spite you. only reason i dont is bc its very dusty where i work and you wpuld think otd help but it actually

[be-good-to-bugs]

i wish i had time 2 draw

[princeanxious]

:) so. No one ordered it, but, I have an Logan Angst(w/ hurt/comfort to balance it out a little) au idea to deliver!

So you know those AU fics w/ Virgil where he hides smth unusual abt himself( Like wings, Spider limbs, Being unusually tall, ect.) Bc he’s afraid of what the others will think/do if they find out?

Take that and apply it to Logan, But he’s actually been hiding it ever since (AU)!Thomas became Obsessed with Marine Biology as a kid!(i genuinely cant remember what Thomas's real life degree was gonna be b4 he switched to YouTube but for the au's sake im going with marine biologist)

What’s he hiding, you ask? Fish scales, of course!

(Continued under the cut)

Logan used to wear long sleeves all the time, and Sherlock bit with the scarf was a cover up for when he used to wear it constantly when they were younger, not that Virgil(who has spider traits in this but never thought to hide them b4 he was accepted, and by that point there was no reason to) nor any of the other dark sides with animal traits knew about it either, but his body, especially his legs and hips, were covered in shimmery sapphire blue scales, and in patches around the gills on his neck and ribs.

Why doesn't Logan wear long sleeves now? Because the scales suddenly stopped reappearing (coincidentally right around the time Thomas gave up on marine biology to do youtube) on his arms the few times they'd accidentally been pulled off some how, be it bumps/scrapes or eventually Logan getting fed up w/ the illogicalness of it all and 'removing' the rest on his arms so that he could finally wear short sleeves and not raise more questions about his health.

The scales around the gills on his neck are more tragic, as they do regrow still, to keep his gills safe. He plucks them as close to the gills as possible, before wearing masking makeup & a high collar with a tie to ensure his gills never peak out from his shirt.

It limits his normal comfortable way of breathing, but hes been doing it so long that he doesnt remember what it feels like, and thus isn't bothered by it anymore, as his gills dont open up fully anymore unless submerged under water for a long period of time.

Why is he so insistant about thomas drinking the healthy recommended amount of water? Because if Logan didn’t, he'd suffer migraines and get sick from being dehydrated in easily less than half the time it'd take for Thomas or any of the others to reach

Why doesnt he ever go swimming with the others? Because if he did, there's no gaurantee his body would let him leave the water after refusing to so much as even soak in a bathtub for years at this point

Hell, his body might even go into shock at that point.

No idea how his reveal would go, but the idea of the others spraying him with water spray bottles when he is over-dry and resultingly irritable has been brought up as an additional idea by @this-is-ske(my lovely frien who lets me info dumb abt all my aus so we can shout abt them together) and my only thought is that Logan is spiteful and petty enough to snatch a spray bottle and spray them right back.

He often needs to spray himself with water, even if he’d had a shower not two hours ago, because his scales dry out very quickly and its sensory hell in combination with even the softest of dress pants.

But the years of neglect slowly turned his shimmery sapphire blue scales into dulled greyblue, as a result from being dried out and flakey and unhealthy for so long.

He tries not to think about it too hard when he's forced to look at them.

Remus wouldn’t hesitate to toss post-reveal(and post-recovery)! Logan full out into a fucking pool, or just hop into one and drag him in with. "Dry Fishies are irritated fishies, be like me! Get wet and feel better!" *Cue Remus eye brow waggle that reflects to the rest of his tentacle arms*

No but srsly remus and janus finding iut and going "oh HELL no" bc janus knows what its like to not take care of your scales properly and Remus knows what its like to dry out.

Imagine the additional angst when Janus finds out not only about the scales but the gills on his ribs and neck too, and feels SUPREMELY guilty bc of the crook yank he did

"Its fine, its not like I could breath out of them anymore, they just bruised a bit longer" *even more concerned and upset Janus noises*

"What do you mean you cant breath out of them anymore!"

" ..One day they just wouldn't open? Sort of like the equivalent of a stuffed nose, except that they never reopened because they'd fully dried out, I think."

"I swear to god Logan I wish I could strangle you," *cue Janus wapping Logan w/ a rolled up paper, Edna Mode style, lecturing* "One day! You'll understand! Self care! Is good! For you!"

Cue them finally bullying Logan into taking care of them but no longer hiding the scales as the ones on his arms start coming back, but still greyblue, bc at this point Logan doesnt even want to deal with the immediate headache of them learning right off the bat that they Shouldnt Look Like That. He doesnt even really believe that they'll ever change back to their once brilliant blue, thinking it just a fluke with their age or something.

It takes months.

And then one day he wakes up, having been sleeping in the imagination with Remus, having indulged in underwater sleeping as a healing therapy, made better only by the fact that Remus is a rly good cuddler, and his tentacles keep them both locked together in the water, *and* one anchors them so they don't drift away in their sleep.

Remus is staring at him, his chest to be exact, where new patches of scales had been growing to meet in the middle around the gills on his ribs. He looks down and notices theres an uneven patch of brilliant blue peaking out from the sea of comparably grey scales. Then he notes that multiple patches of scales are slowly regaining their hue. It doesn't take long for the others to put two and two together about sick fish with dull scales. It confirms Logan had been sick for Years, and was only Just healing to a beginning state of equilibrium.

For some comfort w/ all this angst, when Logan does see his blue scales for the first time? He smiles, he smiles so wide at Remus. Remus probably falls in love with the way Logan's gills flare out prettily in time with Logan's smile. Logans finally convinced to take care of himself, and the first glimpse of progress has him Beaming for Days.

[grimmjowjaegerjaquez]

Nobody Wants This Bc She Sucks But Fuck You I’m Gonna Talk About Her Anyway

loly aivirrne sucks. shes the absolute worst and is an unrepentant bastard. but that’s what i like about her. also bc shes a centipede and it kicks ass. and because i keep thinking about a series thats been over for years and is never gonna have any more shit (theres light novels but i dont have the patience to read) im gonna develop her. DESPITE HER HORRIBLENESS, i am of the belief that she deserves what all the girls in bleach deserve: better. and like, fuck, im not going back to the rpc so heres some headcanons lmao

she hides her zanpakuto in her eye mask fragment. kubo makes a repeated joke that she hides it somewhere weird n nasty and i rolled my eyes both times. 

in a desperate attempt to prove her worth, she tried to sell herself as a secretary/aide rather than a fighter. she is not actually good at secretary work and is much better suited to combat, but because she wanted to be seen as attractive and traditionally womanly, she tried to repress that.

she ended up being very insecure about her femininity and appeal, and this may or may not have been subtly encouraged by someone who wanted to keep all the arrancar under his thumb. 

bc yknow if shes too busy being catty and petty to other girls and fussing over herself, then she’ll never notice that she’s being punked!

her treatment of orihime is just the culmination of that! it has nothing to do with orihime herself and all to do with loly trying to maintain her place in the pecking order and feeling threatened/intimidated by another girl!

i imagine she treated menoly much the same before orihime ever showed up bc she was another aide to aizen and you cant have that! but menoly followed behind her, and that kinda just encouraged loly to continue treating her badly. 

and bc of all this shit shes been internalizing, someone that doesnt strike back and is stubbornly kind, compassionate out of spite instead is incredibly alien to her. it disgusts her! how could anyone be like that! dont they know what this world is like? its hate vs hate! its dog eat dog! you weirdo!

and out of denial of everything that shes seen, she holds onto all of that for far longer than she should, because its the only way of life that makes any sense! right? right??

eventually she gets over it, and realizes that she used all of that to hold herself way back. who was she trying to kid with this “oh im an aide!! i do paperwork and stuff :)” bullshit. she wasted her time with all of that when she could’ve been making herself way deadlier!

now that she has no one to try and be sexy for shes free to go fucking apeshit and be the most bastardous she can be. and she can wear cute things bc now its what she wants instead of just being expected of her. Girls Night Every Night.

and in her own... way... she does end up apologizing to orihime. she doesnt say “sorry :(” but she does talk about it. and then immediately cover it up by calling her weird and never speaking to her again.

now for the most out there shit masterminded by me and @devilatelier​ who is the only valid nnoitra

aivirrne isn’t loly’s original last name. she changed it to distance herself from her big brother who she hates and is rebelling against. who is this big brother, you may ask? what are you pulling out of your ass now? well, it is of course, the other shitty bug arrancar, Nnoitra. hear me out:

they’re both complete bastards

they both have their mask fragment over the same eye

they’re both bugs

they both have dark hair and similar colored eyes (pink, purple, close enough)

they both have a voice of reason in the form of a more even-tempered blonde

they’re both rude as hell to their blondes

and if we go with canon and nnoitra is indeed dead, she never gets to reconcile with him. so thats just another extra thing for her to angst over. i mean he sucked, but she sucked too. sketchy of them in the past:

anyway heres a rough redesign of her post-aizen bc god damn why did you make this seemingly teenaged girl have her tits out 

[thankyoumskobayashi]

i think there is significance to the fact that shen wei wears glasses. i will have to go back and rewatch to find specific evidence but when we first meet him he is wearing glasses, as professors are oft to do. this helps him not only blend in on haixing but signal to the viewers that there may be more to him than what he shows.

glasses are a form of disguise. the best mainstream example of this is that picture of griffin mcelroy without his glasses on. i had seen pictures of griffin only with glasses on before that and would not have recognized him if the poster had not said "this is griffin mcelroy without glasses on". that said, the glasses are a form of disguise that shen wei wears, akin to the black cloak and mask he wears as the envoy of dixing. not to borrow phrasing from a certain video game franchise too much but when shen wei wears one mask, he adopts a persona to go along with it.

the three personas shen wei uses are his envoy self, poised and commanding; his professor self, patient and wise; and his true hopelessly gay self, who wants everyone to just live in harmony so he can marry the man of his dreams.

he started out the series with his three personas separate from each other. in the beginning he only wore his glasses and acted lukewarm yet friendly to zhao. if it weren't for the flashback that shows them together in ancient times, the viewer never would have guessed shen wei's true feelings towards zhao yunlan.

when shen appeared as the black-hooded envoy, zhao yunlan teased him bc that's how he is with everyone. shen replied formally and cooly, trying to keep his distance with someone he once knew well. he feels that, as envoy, there are certain things he must do to keep being respected. one of those is sticking to his morals and another is being formal everywhere.

under closer scrutiny, once can see that this "being formal everywhere" is applied to the professor persona as well. shen wei wears a suit everywhere when he is teaching and even when he is not teaching. i can imagine this causes many to admire him for good looks and care to appearance, but the other professors (we have only met a woman professor so far, but i would be curious what a man professor thinks of his brilliant colleague), that suit may be seen as a way to be aloof. personally i find it endearing that as someone who has been on haixing for so long, shen wei would only dress in formal wear or in sweater vests i affectionately nicknamed "history teacher sweaters." (named thus after my 8-9 grade world history teacher).

in fact, shen wei seems so caught up in keeping his own identities a secret that he misses out on a. the culture around him and b. just being himself. after he pulled off mesmerizing hua zong and saving zhao yunlan he was watching zhao get drunk and impulsively chugged one shot of alcohol, got blackout drunk instantly, and passed out for 2-3 days. after that, he has the life experience to say no when offered alcohol by zhao yunlan in the future.

similarly, when the face stealer was being hunted, shen wei was strolling home in the dark without his glasses on. he was caught by the SID and put on his glasses before turning around, because at that point in time, he HAD to keep up his professor persona to deflect unwanted questions. at the same time he had to be on guard against the dixing agents sent by jiu zhu to destroy the SID as well as not arousing suspicion from zhao yunlan. but he ended up interesting zhao yunlan even more with his cover story of "i am merely a simple college professor,,, who holds a PhD, ,, and is absolutely smart enough to handle having 2 aliases,,,, i just Hapen to appear in the exact spots you are investigating bc theyre all abt my students,, o Woe is me."

on the other hand, maybe the darkness and the unknown is shen wei's chosen aspect. he's gay, which is another thing he has to hide, and it would make terrible unfunny sense to shove him into the (dark) closet in the censored rendition of the gay novel guardian. not only that, but also shen's powers are possibly infinite, as he mirrors all the dixing powers he comes across. the darkness is infinite as well, so why is shen pursuing the spark of knowledge/science in spite of this?

that answer will arrive as soon as i start rambling some more. okay. so. probably bc it's a distraction from the angst over not being able to save zhao 10 000 years ago. and so that he can learn abt this world from a place of relative privilege even though his alternate ego as a dixing royal goes largely unacknowledged. academia is his position of power in haixing, while law enforcement and learning is his power in dixing. it's the balance he strives for, the mirroring of roles and sources of power. not that he can help but let those two roles bleed into each other once he joins the SID.

his feelings for zhao yunlan have helped him become his more authentic self in all of these roles. the hopelessly gay shen wei has been bleeding into his envoy persona recently, which is why he granted chu parole. the evil lost grandpa notes this when he, shen wei, and zhao yunlan's cat were looking for the trio accused of murder. he said something like "we have different ideas on this, so we should split up." then once they are found the envoy says "we have no reason to suspect the other two, let us just blame the new king candidate and call it a day" (paraphrase).

more to come later bc im not done with this essay but i dont have time. the main points to pick up with later are how he shows zhao yunlan his envoy persona when the evil old grandpa shows up to say he lost some important book. when shen wei yells at the justiciar and zhao yunlan is that both horny and scared gif.