#maybe i dislike how this blog was initially a 'vent blog' when i created it and i kinda want to leave this dead snake skin behind

[sgkjd]

i actually maybe don't like "blogging" at all. maybe it was just the best option i had at a certain time in my life. maybe i even feel repulsed by it now. maybe i just feel sick of the blogging i personally tried to do. maybe i have thoughts on creating a completely new account on here and experimenting with how expressing myself in the blogging format works best for me. (maybe i never really considered that i can blog in ways that'd be more enjoyable for me). maybe i want to only have one blog instead of 363828 sideblogs for different interests, maybe i finally know how to fit my multitudes inside one body and one mind.

[glittering-snowfall]

EDIT: Since the making of this post, beingpassionateabout has apologized to shy-peacock in a respectful and earnest fashion. She and I have had a civil conversation and I have apologized for misjudging her. We still disagree on certain things, of course, but can do so respectfully.

I still feel that Isa can be overly hostile and antagonistic to others, including those in her own ship, and the words she said about me today when I did my best to make this post as respectful and calm as possible still sting. Many of my feelings about Isa’s behavior still stand, though I never meant this post as an attack on her - merely a discussion of the times I have seen her behavior hurt friends of mine.

I am glad, at least, that positive things have been able to come of this post, like beingpassionateabout and shy-peacock being able to patch things up. That is a testament to shy-peacock’s sweetness. 

Elsanna has been my OTP since 2015. I’ve dedicated years of my life to this blog and still cherish the beauty of the ship as deeply as the day I first admitted I shipped it. Yes, in the intervening years, I’ve become a multi-shipper, but my love of Elsanna has never dimmed and it’s out of that love that I’m choosing to speak up now.

I’m concerned with the way hereisisa and beingpassionateabout push fellow Elsanna shippers away with their overly-confrontational and antagonistic attitudes. 

Before Frozen 2 came out, I remember when hereisisa reposted a piece of demonfencer’s art. When fellow Elsanna shippers told her that she could reblog the piece from the artist’s tumblr or at least link to the artist, instead of listening she blocked fellow shippers (x). (I recognize that now isa gives credit for the art she reposts, but the fact she reacted so negatively initially shows the overzealousness of her personality - even when engaging with fellow EA shippers.)

More recently, isa lashed out at @shy-peacock because shy-peacock disagreed with the overly-negative things isa was saying about Honeymaren’s voice actress (x) Both isa and beingpassionateabout mocked shy-peacock and blocked her in spite of the fact that shy-peacock ships Elsanna and loved isa’s blog. This hurt her deeply (x). All shy-peacock was saying was that Isa did not need to be so rude about the voice actress, and for that reason, Isa chose to shut her out - regardless of the fact she ships Elsanna. (Personally, I agree with shy-peacock. Isa can dislike any character she wishes, but I feel like her tone towards voice actors is overly extreme. She’s made negative personal comments about Kristen Bell as well.)

Finally, Isa and beingpassionateabout’s behavior has alienated @angelshizuka, distancing her more an more from the ship. Angelshizuka, like shy-peacock, can vouch for this - and before anyone accuses her of being a multi-shipper who is biased in favor of KA or EM, I want to remind everyone that she was shipping Elsanna from the very beginning and making beautiful gifsets for the ship. She has defended EA and ships like it for ages, and stood tall against antis. The only thing pushing her away now is the painful experiences she has had with people like Isa and beingpassionateabout. And Serena, I’m so sorry.

The thing that vexes me about isa and beingpassionateabout is that they can behave like antis - and as Elsanna shippers, we know firsthand how horrible antis can be and do we really want to be like that? Recently, I recall @dee-house discussing how EM and EA can coexist and negativity towards EM is pointless, and Isa decided to start a fight over that. Again, dee ships Elsanna, but I guess that hardly matters to Isa (x). 

Elsanna is a ship rooted in True Love, a love that spreads warmth across Arendelle - touching the farthest reaches of the land, touching the hearts of everyone therein. It is a beautiful and all-encompassing love, and as Elsanna shippers, we should follow the example of Anna and Elsa and be open-hearted. People like Isa and beingpassionateabout push fellow Elsanna shippers away, suggest that they don’t belong for one reason or another. But if you ship Elsanna and you’re kind, you belong. Maybe you disagree with someone’s negative behavior, but that doesn’t make you less than. Maybe you’re a multi-shipper, but that doesn’t mean you love Elsanna any less - and hereisisa’s and beingpassionateabout’s gatekeeping seems like a painfully narrow and hostile attitude to create from a ship that is so truly loving and all-embracing.

I still love Elsanna so much (and indeed, just a few days ago I was venting about anti-EA negativity I’ve been forced to witness as a multi-shipper, so if someone wants to use my multi-shipping against me, remember that I’ve also condemned negativity from anti-EA people) and, as Elsanna shippers, I know we are all stronger together. There’s no need to gatekeep or be mean to fellow shippers (there’s no need to be mean to anyone). As shy-peacock pointed out, “We have enough people mean to us as is.”

And I know that there are so many open-hearted, loving, understanding people out there who ship Elsanna. And we can focus our efforts on making beautiful fanart, creating beautiful fanfiction, spreading the beautiful love of our ship instead of negativity.

[marvelousescapism]

hey sorry honestly i have no idea how any of that read as bucky hate bc. it wasnt and also like im not saying no one can find him compelling or interesting or anything lol i just meant that the huge amount of hype around him in and out of fandom spaces is absolutely a result of him being a hot white guy first and anything else second. like the amount of people who make sexy edits of him being tortured and the like is. staggering and kinda uncomfortable

ah you're back. first of all, thank you for clarifying that what you said wasn't meant in a hateful/malicious way. sorry i thought that way initially (but there is a fair bit of drama-baiting going around and i really don’t want to engage with fandom drama myself, so i hope you understand).

second of all, i'm not sure what sort of answer you're looking for from me here exactly. like, i'm not sure what i said or reblogged that prompted your asks. maybe you just feel like my blog is somewhere you feel safe venting about things that are upsetting you - in which case, i’m glad you feel that my little spot on the internet is a safe place to express yourself, but please do keep in mind that i personally would like to avoid engaging with quite a lot of d*scourse that’s going around.

i'm gonna go ahead and assume that your intentions are good and that you’re just looking for some reassurance for how you're feeling about this - which i understand completely. i've put my response under a cut so that it doesn't clog up other people's dashes - i hope you don't mind.

now, because i know nothing about you and i suck at communicating in general, it’s hard for me to tell what your specific feelings regarding bucky and his fandom are. so i might be getting this wrong, but i think what you’re saying is that you like bucky as a character, but his fandom annoys you.

i think the healthiest thing for you to do is to disengage with blogs and fans and content creators whose opinions are making you feel uncomfortable and annoyed. go on an unfollowing spree. block people. block me if i reblog a lot of bucky content you don’t enjoy. don’t feel like you’re being rude - you’re just creating a fandom experience that you can enjoy.

sexy edits of his torture scenes and other objectification-for-the-sake-of-objectification content about bucky makes me uncomfortable too, so i don't follow people who post or share that kind of content (which is why it surprises me that you've found staggering amounts of it - i hardly see any myself!).

i don't dislike people who do make or enjoy this content, though, because that's how they personally engage with this character and that's not for me to judge. but if you personally feel like you dislike these people, that's even more reason to disengage with them.

now, when it comes to your aggravation over people engaging with bucky’s character predominantly because he’s a hot white guy, i really do sympathize. i agree completely that, if bucky weren’t conventionally attractive, or if he were a person of colour, or if he were a woman, he would not have nearly as many fans as he does now. and it really sucks.

fandom spaces are microcosms of the misogynistic, racist society we live in, and have been catered by white people for decades (due to, among other reasons, lack accessibility to these spaces for people of colour, and people of colour not being made to feel welcome in these spaces). it’s something we all need to be wary of and the fandoms i’m in definitely have a whole bunch of issues when it comes to racism and sexism.

however!! this is not a conversation i, as a white person, feel i should be leading. so i’m gonna leave it at that and move on.

i do feel that, when it comes to your annoyances over people only engaging with bucky’s character only because they find him attractive, this may be something you ought to practice forgiving people for. how people personally engage with a character - whether you feel it’s a shallow engagement or an engagement that makes you feel uncomfortable - does not need to be something that encroaches on your personal engagement with a character. try to understand that the person posting/reblogging this content did not mean for someone like you (i.e. someone who would be annoyed at this content) to see it, forgive them, unfollow or block them if you feel that’s best, and try to move on. it will get easier the more you do this.

the fact of the matter is that some people do only engage with certain characters because they find them hot. and that’s okay! that’s how those people are having fun in fandom - it doesn’t mean you also have to participate this way, and it is not your duty to persuade them to participate in a different way. engaging with a character just because you find them hot isn’t a bad thing. it harms no one. and, at the end of the day, as long as the way you are engaging with fandom harms no one irl, there’s nothing wrong with it.

phew. okay. im done.

sorry this response got so long! i really hope it didn’t come across as condescending because that was not my intention at all. but i do hope there’s something in this long-winded ramble that you find helpful. adios, my friend.