#memorecipes

[glitchdollmemoria]

tumblr user glitchdollmemoria is a samefooder! its safe food is broccoli and rice AND ITS SHARING THE RECIPE MOTHERFUCKERS

[legal disclaimer: im a broke autistic cunt who was not taught many life skills as a teenager and is now learning to cook through trial and error and page 1 of google]

Obligatory Unrelated Pre-Recipe Storytime:

when i was a child my mother bought me the first percy jackson book and i read it like a starving dog devouring meat scraps from a mcdonalds dumpster. i then tried to check out the second book from my school library, but the librarian told me my mother had told her not to let me check it out. i was very confused and hurt, but quickly found out this was only because she was planning on buying me a hardcover box set of the entire series.

Ingrediences:

broccoli florets

jasmine rice

garlic powder

dried minced onion

kosher salt

soy sauce

teriyaki glaze

vegetable oil (or other oil of choice)

Steps For Proletariat Rice (no rice cooker available):

rice goes in pot water goes in rice. jasmine rice is softer than standard white rice so you dont need as much water. i think the article i read said to use 1 and 1/4 cups of water per 1 cup of rice, but i cant find that article again, and i estimate water amounts by eyeballing it based on how much rice im cooking and where the water comes up on my pinky finger. i could not begin to explain my methods, so please follow your heart, or a better recipe writer

start by bringing the contents of the pot to a boil without a lid

once the water is bubbling, change the heat to the lowest temperature and put a lid on that thang. monitor the rice because i dont have an accurate internal clock and dont know how long it takes for my rice to cook. all rice dishes are unique individuals and you have to meet them where theyre at

rice is done

Steps For Delicious Broccoli:

put some oil in a frying pan. the amount of oil you use will determine the texture of the broccoli, less for crisper broc, more for soggier broc. follow the mouthfeel. experiment with it

broccoli goes in the oily frying pan

shake garlic powder, onion bits, and salt on those veggies. you want them FLAVORFUL so do not be shy. just watch out for the hubris (adding too much and becoming overwhelmed by garlic). mix your broc to disperse seasonings

fry those tasty morsels at medium-low heat, i usually go with about a 3 on my stove. LET THEM SIT. LET THEM REST. you want them to get a little itty bit charred for maximum yummy crunchiness. occasionally flip them around in the pan to allow other sides to become charred as well, or else theyll feel left out. once again follow the mouthfeel to decide when theyre ready. i dont generally put a lid over the broccoli as it fries because that results in them being steamed -> extra soggy texture

broccoli done

Bring That Shit Together:

serve broccoli on a bed of rice and top with both soy sauce and a generous drizzle of teriyaki glaze. mix it to spread the sauce joy evenly. dont burn your mouth. love you

[glitchdollmemoria]

☆ ♪ about (mobile version) ♪ ☆

comfort character tag format is "#cc: [NAME]"

potentially triggering content will be tagged as "#[THING] cw". example: "#bugs cw". please dont hesitate to ask for something to be tagged!

under 18 please block "#minors dni"

PRO ANA BLOGS STOP FOLLOWING ME I WILL REPORT YOU <3

[glitchdollmemoria]

new drink or maybe a potion which i call the Condensed Adulthood + name reasoning annotations

3 week old cream soda (cannot drink all at once due to increasing health concerns)

vanilla ice cream from a tub of ice cream which youve been eating from directly whenever the hankering arises (health concerns again) (no one can make me use a bowl)

cheap (im poor) vodka (i can drink as much as i want forever)

use however much of whatever you want because life is finite