#mother daughter torture FirstBorn Family siblings expectations Shelby

[saracusic]

My poor first born...

Tonight around the dinner table we were discussing life and all the fun (they say painful) things my children had to deal with growing up.... As if I wasn't the perfect parent all the time!

After some realization I might feel slightly sorry for my Shelby.  Being the first born some times could have been a little harder then say middle or baby.   I may have had some crazy expectations that she needed to live up to, failure wasn't an option for her.   She would be a straight A student with perfect penmanship!  Now fast forward to Jackson and well lets just say my expectations could have fallen to the way side.  I mean he is my baby my last little Cusic.  Kinda helps me over look A LOT.

Anyway we are here to talk about this beauty.

Look at my baby girl, so cute that some days I want to lock her up.  Her cuteness, silly deposition, and all around wholesome personality makes me so proud to be her momma.   I like to think all that “extra parenting” helped mold her to being a wonderful daughter she is today... Even with being a teenager I can't complain. 

So tonight sitting around the kitchen table you can imagine my surprise when she starts listing all the things I made her do that Hailey and Jackson get by with.  Lets look at a couple of her issues...

Apparently in Kindergarten I would ensure (she says threaten her life) that she knew her sight words and could spell all of them with ease.  Doesn't matter that we would need to study for hours sometimes (which to a 5yr old may have felt like days). Another awesome parenting skills that she felt could have used some adjustment was, I would make her write each word that she spelled wrong 5 times...  I have you know that to this day she still knows how to spell dog like a champ..... Your welcome!  Hailey got a “good job you just need to work on spelling dog better”  and Jackson got sight words AGAIN... UGH whats the easiest thing we can do..

Moving on to grades 1 thru 5... handwriting.   So I get that some kids in elementary school could have bad handwriting, but not my Shelby.  To help ensure her perfect penmanship she would need to practice writing her words like I wrote them.  IF I found fault with what and how she wrote them I would possibly make her do it 10 more times...  I say Your welcome because now I make you do all the writing I need when it comes to labels or if I want something to look good.   Clearly if you saw Jacksons handwriting you would be asking what language is he writing in.   Again your welcome Shelby even if you did have hand cramps and I would yell because you were complaining... I still feel completely ok with life

You are your sisters keeper and while your at it watch your brother!!    This line makes me laugh so hard.... I can still remember yelling it from the kitchen window.  The hard life of a 7 year old managing 6yr old Hailey and 3 yr old Jackson.  I like to think this is why she is so good with kids and wants to be a pediatric  surgeon.   Your welcome for a great career ahead of you.  You would have never wanted such a career without needing to care for your sister on a daily and an occasional jackson too.    Learning to mend her wounds not matter if they were real or not... Hailey maybe or maybe not being a hypochondriac taught you patience and a caring hand.   Jackson... well he was never bad because lets face it, he is perfect :)

Now don't you see how all that “extra patenting” has molded her into the sweet caring teen you see today.   

I can't really relate to being a first child... I am the beloved yet sometimes forgotten middle child. This could be why I may or may not have been harder on lil Shelby.   I think as parents we all want our children to have that life we always wanted but were to afraid to get or weren't able to have.   I struggled with school and had the worst handwriting until the day my mother sat me down and made me write from a book, pages and pages, until they were neat.  During this torturous moment and swearing I would never do this to my child, I learned how to parent and have great handwriting.   

We all learn little things, some work some don't but as long as we keep our lil angels on the right path to being the wonderful people we know they can be we are doing the best we can.   With each kid we might change up our game, lessons are learned and priorities shift.  It might just be ok if they don't have the best handwriting in school or can't remember how to spell Dog, isn't that what spell check is for anyway. 

I love you my shel belb, and you love me even if I  slightly pressured you as a kid.