#my first prison reid fic omg | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

isthisthingeven0n · 4 years

Text

knowing you : s.r

spencer has been a regular at your cafe for a few months, and after working up the courage to ask you on a date he disappears out of the blue without an explanation. (2.4k)

knowing you / forgetting you / remembering you / with or without you / starting over, with you

There were elements to your job that you had a love/hate relationship with. The mornings where you woke up before the sun fully had, dealing with rude customers deprived of their first dose of caffeine along with the pseudonyms they provide you with (which you’ve learned you can’t always yell out as the elders freak out.) And lastly, your staff (but they tended to lean heavier on the love side of things.)

Yet, amongst all of it, you still managed to smile by the time you closed up in the evening. You adored your little cafe, though it was never heaving with people, it was comfortable.

“Hey, look who’s hovering outside.” Your colleague, Maggie nudges you playfully as you glance over the counter to the large window filled with your menu written in calligraphy.

And standing in front of it, the quiet smart guy you’ve grown fond of; Spencer.

A smile grows across your face, but you hide your head in the steam that rises from the milk for a second. “It’s been what, two days since he was last here?” Maggie quips, waiting for you to comment.

“Everyone’s gotta get coffee somewhere, Mags.” You remind her, brushing it off.

Spencer was a customer at the end of the day, just like everyone else. Just because he came to your cafe doesn’t mean he’s here for anything more than his double espresso and a blueberry muffin. Even if your heart wished it could be more.

Pushing open the door, the little bell sounds and Spencer looks up before smiling over to you. “Morning, Spencer.” You beam as you lean across the counter as Spencer eyes up the various pastries and paninis you had to offer this morning.

“Hi,” Spencer speaks quietly, clutching his satchel across his chest. “could I get a double espresso and two muffins, please?”

“A double?” Maggie pitches in, and Spencer looks over to your colleague who stands beside you, holding back her tongue as Spencer nods.

“Caffeine stimulates a similar effect as the stress hormone cortisol, which is secreted in large amounts after an hour or two of waking up in the morning. It takes on the form of waking you up, making you believe you need the caffeine as, without it, you can have stomach aches, headaches and trembles.” Spencer rambles, and you nod in appreciation for the knowledge. “And I prefer a double.”

“Guess you like strong coffee, then.” Maggie mutters, giving you the eye as you smile to yourself.

Turning around you carry on prepping the machine as the espresso drips into the paper cup. “Two muffins, huh? Saving one for later?” You chuckle as you pick the two freshest muffins out that are still warm from the oven.

And then you hear it, Spencer’s awkward chortle that causes butterflies to flutter in your stomach and rise to your throat.

Swallowing the butterflies back down, you place the box onto the counter alongside his coffee, his name written across it with a smiley face.

“Well, I wanted to take one for my friend, Garcia. She’s been by here before, I don’t know if you’d remember her?” Spencer explains and watches you closely, noticing how your eyes drift off into deep thought and your tongue slips through your lower lip before you shake your head. “She probably complimented every single detail in the cafe, wore something colourful?” He adds, and suddenly your eyes light up as you remember.

“Penelope? How could I forget! I’ll give her a complimentary muffin if she comes in again.” You giggle, and Spencer’s eyes crinkle up as he accepts the small box and coffee.

“She’ll love that. Thank you.” Spencer states as he places the cash onto the counter and adds a few dollars to your tip jar- something you forget exists as it collects dust most days, but Spencer always leaves a three dollar tip.

“Thank you, Spencer. Have a good day.” You begin to turn away as you clean up the counter and coffee machine, missing the longing glance Spencer has before he heads to the door, but thankfully Maggie is watching like a hawk.

“Have a good day?” Maggie mutters, crossing her arms. “He was giving you the eyes, babe.” She comments, but you roll your eyes in response once more.

Picking up your tray, you move past the counter and over to clean up a table. “He wasn’t, Maggie.” You simply reply.

“He was dear.” A new voice pitches in, one of your regulars, Annie. “Finding someone who looks at you like he does is a rare thing, I would know.” Annie’s focus drifts to the empty seat opposite her, one that has been vacant for a few months since her husband passed.

“I don’t know, Annie,” You trail off, but some of your other regulars also comment on the small looks exchanged between you and Spencer. “Sorry. am I being interrogated in my own cafe?” You joke as three of your regulars laugh before returning to their own conversations.

“Don’t let it slip out of your grasp, Y/n.” Annie finishes as she rises to her feet, leaving her mug with a few dollar bills underneath before walking out of the exit.

Sighing deeply, you run your fingers through your hair as your mind goes blank, unable to apprehend how various people have seen you giving Spencer those soppy glances and the fact they might be reciprocated?

You shrug it off, allowing your mind to return to work as another customer comes in, and your day can proceed as normal.

“Bye guys,” You wave off your colleagues as Maggie closes the door behind her, leaving you to close up for the evening.

It had been a fairly slow day, but Thursdays tended to be in the cafe so it wasn’t anything to worry about.

As you walk around to the counter and bend down to collect the leftover cakes you hear the bell chime. “Sorry, we’re closed!” You call out, placing a few cakes away before lifting your head up to see a rather flustered Spencer. “Spencer?”

Pushing his hair out of his face, Spencer sighs happily as he smiles to you. “Hi, I, I’m sorry I didn’t realise you closed at 6.” He rambles, a look of hopelessness in his gaze. “I’ll head out, sorry for bothering you, Y/n.”

Spencer turns around, but before he reaches the door, you stop him. “Spencer?” Immediately, Spencer awkwardly spins on his heels, facing you once more. “Would you like a coffee, one for the road anyway?” You shyly suggest, watching as Spencer’s smile only widens as he nods.

“I’d love that, I, I only just got back from a work trip and thought I’d see if you were still open.” Spencer explains as you push aside your containers and take out a go cup.

“That’s alright, I like to do what I can for my regulars.” You chuckle, placing the cup on the counter. As Spencer reaches into his satchel, you shake your head. “Oh don’t worry ‘bout it, Spencer.” You tell him and Spencer pauses.

“I have to pay you, Y/n!” He laughs, but you insist. “Well, at least let me help you close up.”

“Spencer it’s fine honestly. You’re probably tired as it is.” You shrug him off, expecting him to just walk out after that.

But Spencer isn’t like any other guy, he takes a sip of his coffee and removes his satchel and places it on a chair. “Where do I start?” He questions, rolling the sleeves of his purple shirt up to his elbows, prepared for business.

The sight makes you laugh lightly, he looks adorable in every sense which makes you slightly flustered. “Well erm,” You look around, trying to think of an easy job that’ll result in the least hassle for him. “how about you put these cakes away? I’ll drop them off to the food shelter on my way home.” You explain, motioning to the containers and Spencer nods, taking his place behind the counter whilst you clean the tables.

Pausing from placing the cakes into containers, Spencer looks up in awe as you carry on cleaning. “Do you have any flaws?” He thinks to himself, knowing the answer rationally is yes, as every human being has 10 design flaws in the human body, but you personally, he can’t imagine any.

“Did you say something, Spencer?” You quip, lifting your head up as Spencer quickly shakes his head, missing the smile on your lips as you hold back a soft laugh.

“Which food bank do you take these to?” Spencer asks as you move onto your last table, picking up your small menus and coasters whilst you place them onto the chairs.

“Usually the one two blocks over, but sometimes I stop on the way to Gary - he’s a homeless veteran who camps out under the bus shelter. He’s a good man, but life hasn’t been kind to him.” You explain, thinking how different his life could’ve been. “I’ve tried offering him a job here before, but he shakes uncontrollably.”

“That sounds like a sign of PTSD, Veterans used to go undiagnosed during the war and suffered from vivid flashbacks, trembling, nausea and intrusive thoughts. Most were outcasted from society, but expected to adjust to normal life afterwards which is what leads many to the streets.” Spencer explains, and once he finishes, you raise an eyebrow.

“And here I thought you were just a pretty face.” You chuckle, causing a blush to cross Spencer’s cheeks. “You’ve never told me what you do Spencer, outside of drinking heavy doses of caffeine.”

Spencer rests his hands out over the ledge behind the counter as you walk over, discarding the cleaning supplies beside him. “I work for the FBI.” He starts, and you nod along, trying to hide your surprise. “For the BAU, the behavioural analysis unit. We analyse peoples behaviour to assist in cases around the country to help solve crimes.” Spencer explains simply, not wanting to overcomplicate the matter as your eyes widen.

“So you analyse people’s behaviour? Does that mean you’ve analysed me?” You slowly trail off as you move away from Spencer and sit down at one of the tables, suddenly feeling self-conscious as his eyes remain on you.

Moving across the cafe, Spencer pulls out the chair opposite you and rests his hands on the table, firmly clasped together. He doesn’t want to lie to you, but he equally does not want to sound like a creep.

“You can be honest, Spencer.” It’s as if you can read his mind as you give him those warm eyes that greet him in the mornings, making him sure that whatever happens at work, you’ll be alright when he next comes in.

Fidgeting ever so slightly, Spencer closes his eyes to allow his mind to focus- something that is usually effortless, but whenever you cross his thoughts they become scrambled.

“You are a warm person naturally, an extrovert as you invite people into your cafe. Mornings are a struggle as you keep a refillable cup by your side next to the coffee machine. I saw you refill it last Tuesday and it must’ve been at least your third cup as I was later that day. You like to please others, make them happy and by doing so you sacrifice your own wellbeing. Helping people makes you happy, but you don’t do it for selfish reasons which I like a lot about you, Y/n.” Spencer explains, and as he looks up you stare at him in a state of awe.

“And you got all that, from interacting with me every week?” You laugh lightly, leaning back in your chair as astonishment crosses your eyes as you click your tongue.

“Yes.” Spencer curtly nods. “That and I have an IQ of 187, an eidetic memory and 3 PHD’s.” He adds nonchalantly.

“Just casually slipping that into conversation, Doctor.” You raise an eyebrow, and Spencer brushes his fingers through his curls.

Tearing your eyes from him, you look up at the clock and swear under your breath. “I’m sorry, Spencer, I’ve got to go.” You tell him with a sad smile, not wanting this to end as he gathers his things along with his cold coffee- not that he’d ever tell you otherwise.

Spencer hovers by the doorway as you switch off the last of the lights and juggle the containers in your arms along with your keys. “Let me help with that, Y/n.” Spencer reaches out, his fingers gliding over yours as he takes the boxes painfully slowly.

“Thanks,” You mutter as you turn the sign over on the door and lock it behind you whilst Spencer stands idly outside, the temperature dropping fastly compared to the LA sunshine he had experienced mere hours beforehand. “my cars just up here, do you mind?”

Shaking his head, Spencer walks alongside you. It feels strange, interacting with him outside of your little bubble, but to him, he likes the chance to burst the comfort bubble.

Bearing in mind all that Penelope and Derek have told him on the jet home, Spencer places the containers in the trunk of your car before you close it.

“Well, this is me.” You rock back and forth on your heels as Spencer wracks his mind to communicate with his mouth. “Spencer?” You wave your hand over his face, and suddenly he snaps out of his deep thoughts.

“Sorry,” He mutters, tugging on his scarf. “Y/n, would you like to go out somewhere, sometime? I mean, I love your cafe, but a change of scenery never hurt.” Spencer asks, and he can see the surprise in your expression as you glance away to your feet. “If not, that’s okay. I understand-”

“I’d love to.” You cut him off from his own doubts as you step closer and rise to your tiptoes, kissing his cheek. “Here’s my number, I keep some business cards in my pocket.” You hand him your card and Spencer runs his thumb over the embossed logo.

“I’ll call you.” Spencer tells you with a bright smile, one that causes butterflies to swarm in your stomach as you walk to your car door. “Drive safe, Y/n.”

“Take care Doctor,” You salute to Spencer before you close your door, driving off out of sight as a squeal escapes your lips in excitement at the thought of Spencer calling you.

Except, what you missed as you turned the corner was Spencer getting a phone call that would change everything for the worse, leaving you in the dark as Spencer answers his phone with his full heart now sinking.

He’s heading to Mexico.

PART TWO

741 notes · View notes

rainy-day-gracie · 4 years

Text

Old Friends 10

OMG IT’S HERE

THE FINALE TO OLD FRIENDS

This series will always hold a special place in my heart since it was the very first ever fic I ever wrote. Thank you guys so much for all of the positivity !! I LOVE YOU ALL AND ENJOY :)

Spencer Reid x Reader

Angst, MAJOR FLUFF

MASTERLIST

It was the way my head was throbbing that finally woke me up. Spencer was tied to a chair across from me, not daring to say anything. He looked at me with concerned eyes, asking if I was okay. I gave him a small nod, and he seemed to relax a little.

We were in an abandoned warehouse of some kind and rat traps littered the floor. “Hello?” I croaked out.

Mrs. Lorretta came out from behind me and grabbed my face, studying it. Her thumb dug into my cheek, and I bit down on it, hard.

She screamed out as I licked blood off my lip. “Oh, did I hurt you? I’m sorry.”

“You little bitch!” She shrieked at me, storming off somewhere behind me. Spencer just looked at me gravely.

“You shouldn’t have done that,” he mumbled.

“Couldn’t resist,” I whispered, and Spencer rolled his eyes. My hair was suddenly tugged back, and the barrel of a gun pressed into my temple. “Whoa, whoa. We can talk about this.”

“Not before you know your place, Agent.” Mr. Lorretta’s voice hissed in my ear, and Spencer fought relentlessly against his bonds, suddenly extremely panicked. “You hurt my wife, I’m going to hurt you.”

I turned my head ever so slightly, looking him in the eyes. “My team is going to hurt you, buddy. They’re coming for us, are you ready for when that happens?” My fear didn’t show at all in my voice.

Mr. Lorretta just huffed and walked away, taking the gun with him. I let out a sigh of relief, restating my own words quietly as I heard him walking up some kind of staircase. “They’re coming for us…” Then I remembered something. “Spencer, where’s Lily?”

The look in his eyes told me all I needed to know.

Lily was dead. She knew too much, and that got her killed.

Spencer moved his hands, and I realized he was signing to me. Get the wife, he told me.

The wife must’ve not truly wanted to hurt Lily, and that would’ve caused a rift between them. She was our only way out of here, and I just nearly bit off her thumb.

I gave him a thumbs up, telling him I understood.

Now, he signed.

“Where’s Lily?” I called out, tilting my head back to whoever was behind me.

Mrs. Lorretta stormed in front of me, grabbing my face with her hand. “Shut up right now or I will shoot you.”

“No you won’t. Your husband will, and he’ll just drag you along for the ride.” She let go of my face, staring at me angrily. Spencer subtly nodded at me behind her back. “I know you don’t want to kill anyone, Mrs. Lorretta.”

She gave me an open handed slap across the face, tears in her eyes. “Shut up!”

“Don’t touch her,” Spencer growled as I hunched to the side, bracing for another slap.

I looked Mrs. Lorretta in the eyes as I regained composure. “Think about Lily-” another hit “-she wouldn’t have wanted this-” another hit “-please!”

Mrs. Lorretta looked at me angrily, tears forming in her eyes. “I just wanted to be the perfect mother, and now both my girls are dead,” she whispered.

“No one else has to die, Mrs. Lorretta.” I showed her a side of me that’s vulnerable, a side of me no one sees. “I’ve had to kill some of the most awful people, and I feel sick about it. I can’t imagine how you must feel. But you can still do the right thing, Mrs. Lorretta.”

She wordlessly took out a knife, and I was scared for a moment she had decided to kill us now. That moment subsided when she started cutting the bonds at my wrists and ankles binding me to the chair.

Spencer gave me a look of relief and signed with his hands. Good job.

I smiled at him when Mrs. Lorretta cut my final bond, and Spencer looked to her, expecting her to cut his bonds as well. I cautiously stood, facing Mrs. Lorretta.

She gave me a sad smile, tears flowing down her eyes. “You look so much like Jamie…” she breathed, seeming to be in a daze.

I had to cover my mouth from screaming as she shoved the knife into her own neck.

Running over to Spencer, I quickly untied his bonds before the metallic scent of blood completely filled the room. He stood wordlessly and dragged my hand to the staircase to get out of this godforsaken warehouse.

We ran up the stairs, me barely keeping up with his long legs, and ducked behind crates when we saw Mr. Lorretta looking from across the warehouse curiously. “Honey, everything okay?”

We barely breathed, sure that he could hear the sounds of our pounding hearts. His footsteps were careful, and the sound of a safety being clicked off made my blood run cold.

We scattered from the stack of crates as he fired the first shot at us, getting separated in the process.

I found another dusty stack of crates to hide behind, seeing Spencer duck behind a column.

“Come out, come out wherever you are Agents,” Mr. Lorretta drawled. My heart sank as he moved closer to Spencer, and I ducked closer to him.

“It doesn’t matter if I’ll go to prison. I’m too good for that, and with my resources I’ll be able to get a deal easily.” Mr. Lorretta taunted us, creeping around the cluttered warehouse.

He laughed suddenly. “Dr. Reid is it? Do you like working for the FBI? Get scared sometimes?”

Chills went up my spine as Mr. Lorretta continued taunting Spencer.

“I would be scared too… if my bitch was also my partner in the field.”

Spencer leaped behind Mr. Lorretta, pulling both of Mr. Lorretta’s arms back.

Time seemed to slow when the gun went off as they both fell to the floor. I ran out from behind my hiding spot and grabbed the gun that had slid across the floor. Mr. Lorretta got to his feet to run at me, and I fired the gun twice Once in his chest and the other in his head.

I was already running over to Spencer before Mr. Lorretta fell limp to the floor. Blood was seeping out of Spencer’s stomach, and I ripped off my blazer to stifle the flow.

“I told you we should’ve taken a sick day,” Spencer mumbled.

I laughed despite it all, tears pricking my eyes. “I should’ve taken you up on that offer.” I heard a door being kicked in and the familiar voices of our family calling our names. “Over here! We need medical, federal agent down!”

I seemed to be in a daze when Morgan and Prentiss pulled me off of Spencer, they were saying words but all I could focus on was the way the cold floor turned red with Spencer’s blood.

“Please, come back to me Spencer. There’s still so much more for us.”

I’ve always hated hospitals, but never as much as I do right now. Prentiss and JJ had helped me wash off Spencer’s blood, but they couldn’t erase the images of his pale face from my mind.

My foot tapped incessantly in the waiting room, my palms sweating in the hours of waiting for any news of Spencer.

Rossi held my hand firmly, and I gripped it like a lifeline. Nobody spoke, what was there to say?

“It’s my fault.” I mumbled, not realizing anyone could hear me.

“Don’t say that.” Rossi gripped my hand harder, getting me to look at him. “This is not your fault.”

“Lorretta insulted me… Spencer got angry and reacted… that’s what got him shot.” I kept replaying Lorretta’s words in my head.

I would be scared too… if my bitch was also my partner in the field.

Rossi shook his head. “Don’t do that kiddo. Reid saw an opportunity to get him and it backfired. Don’t make something Reid chose to do somehow your fault.”

A doctor walked into the waiting room. “Dr. Reid.” We all stood, holding our breath for the results. “It was a close call, touch and go for a while, but we managed to stop the bleeding from his stomach. And who is YFN?”

I released a deep breath. “That’s me.”

“He’s been asking for you. He’s still slightly delirious, but he has been wondering where you are. Says he misses you.”

I smiled, tears streaming down my cheeks. “May I see him?”

The doctor nodded, guiding me to Spencer’s room.

He looked so happy when I walked in the room, but also heavily drugged with painkillers. “YFN… you look like a goddess.”

I chuckled and sat gently on the end of his bed. “Hey, pretty boy. I was really scared.”

Spencer offered me his hand, and I took it, not wanting him to strain himself. After a moment he fell asleep, and I took the chair next to the bed, letting him rest for as long as he needed.

Looking at him, wounded and on heavy painkillers, I knew what I needed to do.

Spencer was checked out of the hospital a week later on the insistence that he needed to go back to work.

I took some personal time, which Hotch graciously gave.

We spent our days being lazy around Spencer’s apartment, reading different books and watching Doctor Who religiously.

I was dozing off on Spencer’s shoulder one night when he hit me with a bombshell. “I know you’re not coming back to the BAU.”

I sat straight up, looking him in the eyes. “Why do you say that?”

Spencer gave me a small half smile. “Because when Lorretta insulted you, I was impulsive, and you don’t want me to do something like that again because of my feelings for you.”

Damn, I sometimes forgot he was a profiler. “I can’t have that on my mind constantly in the field, worrying about you or me making a bad call because of personal feelings. Also…”

“You want to teach.” Spencer finished my sentence, a sparkle lighting up his eyes. “You don’t want to be looking at crime scene photos all day, and I understand that. Whatever you do, I will support you.”

I smiled at him, tears pricking my eyes. “I was thinking of teaching a language at Georgetown, or maybe some form of mathematics. I’ve already told Hotch, but I want to stay in the city. With you.”

“I love you, and I will do anything to make you happy, YFN.” Spencer stood up, pulling me by my hands to stand with him. After a moment, he ran off into his bedroom, seemingly looking for something. When he returned, a small black box was tucked into his hand, and he seemed much more nervous than before. Spencer sank to one knee, and the tears really started streaming down my face this time. He took a deep breath, staring into my eyes deeply.

“I bought this about a week after we started dating… the more recent time.” I giggled, watching his sheepish face become full of love. “After everything we’ve been through together since we were 16… I can’t imagine spending the rest of my life with anyone else. YFN YLN, will you marry me?”

It took about two seconds for me to make my decision. “Yes, definitely yes.”

If there was one thing Rossi knew how to do, it was throw a party.

It had been three days since Spencer and I had gotten engaged, and word had also spread to the team about me leaving the BAU.

We sat around a large table in Rossi’s backyard, telling stories, laughing, and sometimes crying. When we moved to the makeshift dance floor Rossi had set up, JJ, Garcia, Prentiss and I all swayed in a tight circle, crying and laughing.

“We will forever miss your badassery!” Garcia rested her head on my shoulder, tears streaming down her face.

“I’ll still be around!” I assured her. “I’m still going to be at every ladies’ night you guys invite me to, and I’m marrying Spencer! You can bet he’s not going anywhere!”

JJ laughed, tears also pricking her eyes. “The geniuses are getting married!”

“You can definitely bet that you are invited to every ladies’ night!” Prentiss hugged me with one arm, a glass of champagne in her hand.

A strong hand touched my shoulder, and I turned to Morgan. “Oh, Derek, don’t start crying on me too!”

He chuckled and pulled me into a hug. “Not a chance. I’m looking forward to you not constantly making me look unimpressive.”

I grinned even wider if that was possible. “I never tried to make you look unimpressive. It just kind of happened. I’m just that awesome.”

Derek laughed and Rossi appeared beside him, kissing me on both cheeks.

“Questo bellissimo capitolo termina, al prossimo!” Rossi yelled in Italian, handing me another glass of champagne.

Hotch pulled me in for a short but meaningful hug. “Congratulations, you two will forever hold on to each other. I can see it.”

I smiled, tears once again filling my eyes. “Thank you, Aaron. That really means a lot, coming from you.”

A hand fell comfortably on my back, and I knew Spencer was behind me. I turned and looked into his coffee brown eyes, the eyes I fell in love with when I was 19, and the same eyes that found their way back into my heart.

We danced together for hours, whispering to each other on the dance floor about anything and everything.

“I can’t wait for a life like this. It won’t be easy, but we’re prepared for that. I love you so much, YFN.”

“I love you too, Spencer.”

Questo bellissimo capitolo termina, al prossimo!

This beautiful chapter ends, onto the next!

TAG LIST: @itsarayofsunshine @thesailbells @squirrellover1967 @softpeteparker @parkeroffline

#spencer reid #dr spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #dr reid #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fic #old friends

173 notes · View notes

ifeelbetterer · 7 years

Note

Ummm... I would like to know the most trash fire episode from EVERY season of Criminal Minds :D I could never pick a single season of my favorite trash show. And since you're watching them all- I swear there's an episode where Reid knocks over a map full of pushpins in whatever random police station they're in that week, and they all fall out and THEN he puts them all back because he remembers. And everyone is like... ::blink:: I can't figure out which ep this is and I've been looking forever

OK, first things first, the Trash Fire of every season (skipping seasons 2, 7, 8, 9 since I haven’t watched those yet):

Season 1: I don’t think the first season has an actual trash fire, but rather a low simmering sizzle of trash.

Season 3: In Heat, in which the unsub was killing gay dudes because of internalized homophobia. While laudable in its intention, the episode is utter trash fire in execution.

Season 4: 52 Pickup. There’s literally a bar scene that reads as Pulled Straight From Fic. It all revolves around an evil class to teach men how to pick up chicks in the worst way and I loved it so. 10/10 recommend Trash Fire.

(Season 4 is the season of seasons, IMO. All the best things are here including early Steve McGarett as unwilling serial killer and Skinner from X-Files as Mr Road Rage and other excellent things. If you watch no other season, watch this one.)

Season 5: SO MUCH TRASH in this season, but ultimately a tossup between The Uncanny Valley (unsub kidnaps and paralyzes women to be her dolls) and The Eyes Have It (and yup it is about a serial killer who takes the eyes). But there’s also an episode about how Goth/Metal (which the show actually cannot see the difference between) is a Bad Scene and will getcha.

Also, the bridge between these two seasons is Tim Curry as Garbage Truck Killer and yuuuuuup it’s that trashy.

Season 6: HAVE YOU SEEN REFLECTION OF DESIRE OMG SUCH UTTER COMPLETE TRASHFIRE. One of the many examples of the show being like I’m Above Gratuitous Violence But I Like To Talk About It At Great Length.

Season 10 aka The Ghost Whisperer Is Here: If The Shoe Fits is the MOST TRASH of all the Trash. It literally ends with Spencer like on one knee putting a glass slipper on a killer Cinderella. All logic is gone, there is only trash left. You will watch it with the face of WAIT WHAT the whole time because WAIT WHAT no seriously w h a t even.

Season 11: The Sandman is utter trash but wonderful and the show knows it and that’s why they adopted that unsub as their Villain Of Choice for like the rest of eternity. This is clearly the episode they gave Joe Mantegna to direct because he aaaaalways directs the trash and then it accidentally was awesome trash instead of trash trash like he usually does. But for actual trash? See Inner Beauty in which Criminal Minds thinks it is the right show to address body image.

Season 12: Obviously, everything about Spencer being in prison is utter trash. Complete, unadulterated trash. It’s hard to narrow it down when like half the fucking season is pure trash. The first episode of the arch is totes worth it for the ~Acting Gubler does and the last is great because Aubrey Plaza is the ideal villain from this show and they know it so they’ll shoehorn her into any old plotline.

i have so many thoughts about criminal minds, if you love me you will ask me about it, just anything at all about it, i love criminal minds and i have a lot of thinky thoughts about it

#ASK ME MORE THINGS ABOUT CRIMINAL MINDS #i have such thinky thoughts about it #seriously this is my area of expertise rn ask me ask me #also i will get back to you on the pin thing when i see it happen

7 notes · View notes